生活大爆炸

生活大爆炸简介
《生活大爆炸》是一部美国情景喜剧，由查克·洛尔和比尔·普拉迪共同创作。

该剧首播于2007年，一经推出便受到了广大观众的喜爱。

剧中讲述了四个天才科
学家和一个漂亮但不太聪明的女孩之间发生的一系列搞笑故事。

主要角色包括，谢尔顿·库珀（由吉姆·帕森斯饰演），他是一个天才物理学家，拥有超凡的智商和极端的洁癖；莱纳德·霍夫斯塔特（由约翰尼·盖尔克奇饰演），他是谢尔顿的室友，也是一名物理学家，与谢尔顿形成了鲜明的对比；霍华德·沃洛维茨（由西蒙·赫尔伯格饰演），他是一名工程师，喜欢穿着夸张的衣服和使用滑稽的语言；拉杰什·库斯拉帕里（由卡纳尔·纳亚尔饰演），他是一名天才天文学家，但有一个问题，就是在女性面前会变得哑口无言；最后是佩妮（由凯莉·库柯饰演），她是一名漂亮但不太聪明的女孩，与四个科学家形成了一段有趣的友谊。

这部剧以幽默的方式展现了科学家们在日常生活中的种种囧事，他们的爱情、
友情和工作。

《生活大爆炸》不仅在美国取得了巨大成功，也在全球范围内赢得了无数粉丝。

该剧的幽默和情感深深地吸引着观众，让人在笑声中感受到了生活的温暖和快乐。

总的来说，《生活大爆炸》是一部非常有趣的情景喜剧，它以独特的方式展现
了科学家们的生活，让观众在欢笑中感受到了生活的美好。

如果你喜欢幽默风趣的剧情和搞笑的对话，那么这部剧绝对不容错过！。

柏杨先生在其《丑陋的中国人》一文提到，我们每一个人都要学会成为一个好的鉴赏家，我们不仅要学会鉴赏自己，鉴赏朋友，鉴赏国家领导人，还要学会鉴赏世间万物。

于是乎，这个学期我用了八个学时来学习《美剧鉴赏》这门选修课，不求成为专家学者，只求能够修身格物，健全自己的灵魂，丰富自己的知识，是自己成长为一个有内涵有故事的人。

很幸运，在这里我聆听到了白老师高屋建瓴般令人深思富有哲理的话语，使自己如醍醐灌顶一般，增长了许多知识，开阔了自己的眼界。

在这里我不仅可以尝试一下鉴赏美剧，还可以和老师畅谈几句哲学，听一听老师的读书心得。

总之这八个学时的课如“细雨湿衣看不见，闲花落地听无声”一般，使我不知不觉的浸淫其中，学到了许多自己喜爱的东西。

说到影视，影视是一门融合了文学音乐舞蹈美学摄影等艺术特点的艺术，是科技发展到一定阶段的产物。

影视鉴赏作为一种大众艺术以其主动的直观性和逼近生活的真实感而因此具有广泛的欣赏性。

一部优秀的影片能够使人得到美的享受和精神上的陶冶。

优秀的影视文化能够促进我们审美素质和道德素质的提高。

经过八个学时影视鉴赏课的学习，我了解到电影的发展以及从多个角度挖掘电影给我们深刻的启示。

这里我从看《生活大爆炸》的过程中，畅谈一下自己对这部美剧的认识，与诸君共勉！这是一部以科学天才为背景的情景剧，其中的人物都极具有个性。

主人公Leonard和Sheldon是一对好朋友。

他们的智商绝对高人一等，因为他们对量子物理学理论可以倒背如流，无论你问他们什么问题，都难不到他们。

但是说到正常生活，这两个不修边幅的男孩就彻底没了脾气。

生活中看似简单的事情，却让他们有迷失在太空里一般的觉。

他们所掌握的那些科学原理根本没有用武之地。

直到有Penny的加入，是这部电视剧增添了更多的笑点。

看电视剧时，我不禁捧腹大笑，看过电视剧之后，我想：海浪过后，沙滩上有贝壳留下；雁阵南飞，空中有悲鸣绝响。

那么美剧又给我留下了些什么呢？首先我是在中学时代的一个暑假期间初次看这部美剧的，也是人生当中看的第一部美剧，因此印象较为深刻。

目录第1集 (2)第2集 (13)第3集 (25)第4集 (36)第1集Previously on The Big Bang Theory... E01《生活大爆炸》前情提要I was offered a summer research fellowship at Princeton. 我得到了普林斯顿大学的夏季研究奖学金A fine institution. 很不错的大学The place where Albert Einstein taught, 阿尔伯特·爱因斯坦教过书的地方and where Leonard got his PhD, 莱纳德也是在那里拿到博士学位so it may have gone downhill.所以那学校可能没落了Gentlemen, you may remember Dr. Nowitzki. 各位还记得诺维茨基博士吗She's back at Caltech for her postdoc. 她又回来加州理工读博士后啦Question. are you seeking a romantic relationship withme?问一下你是想和我发展恋爱关系吗What if I were? 如果我是呢Well, that would raise a number of problems. 这会引起一系列的问题We're colleagues, I'm currently in a relation... 我们是同事我现在有女友Amy? Amy. 艾米艾米Amy? 艾米时至今日Will you marry me? 你愿意嫁给我吗One moment, please. 稍等我一下Really, you're going to answer that right now? 不是吧你真要现在接这电话吗It's Leonard. 是莱纳德打来I don't want to be rude. 我不想失礼嘛Hello? 你好Oh, hey, where you been? 你上哪去了We've been calling you for hours. 打你电话找你好久了Oh, I'm sorry, my phone was on "Airplane" Mode.抱歉我的手机之前在飞行模式Why? 为什么Because I was on an airplane. 因为我在飞机上"飞行"啊Hey, put him on speaker. 开公放Y eah. ‭H ey, where are you? 你去哪里了I came to Princeton to see Amy. 我来普林斯顿大学找艾米It's a funny story, actually.其实还挺有意思I was having lunch with Dr. Nowitzki,我当时在跟诺维茨基博士共进午餐and she kissed me. 然后她亲吻了我- Excuse me? - ‭W hat? -什么-啥I'm sorry? 你说什么And in that moment, I realized 在那一刻我意识到that Amy was the only woman I ever wanted to kiss 艾米才是我余生for the rest of my life. 唯一想亲吻的女人So I came to New Jersey to ask her to marry me. 所以我来新泽西跟她求婚Oh, that's so sweet. ‭你真是太甜了- Sheldon... - Y eah, although -谢尔顿... -不过呢there was one man whose blessing I needed first. 我的确是先去求得了某位男士的祝福I've thought about it, and I really want to spend 我想过了也的确想要the rest of my life with Amy. 与艾米共度余生Do I have your blessing? 你会祝福我吗Well, Sheldon... 谢尔顿...I think you should make her finger like Saturn 我觉得你应该将她的手指变成土星and put a ring on it. 再往她手指上套个土星"环"Y ou asked Stephen Hawking and not her father? 你去问了霍金博士而不是艾米父亲吗Stephen Hawking's a genius. 霍金博士是个天才If he said no, I wasn't gonna waste my time on her father. 如果他不支持我才不要浪费时间去问她爹But you did ask my father? 那你有问过我父亲吧I did. He said yes. 有他同意Although, not in a robot voice, so it wasn't nearly as cool. 但不是用机械人式语音说的所以没那么酷Okay. Oh, my God, I can't believe you guys areengaged.我的天啊真不敢相信你们订婚了We're not engaged, yet. 还没订上婚呢She's taking forever to answer. 她想了半天还不回答我Because you're on the phone! 因为你在讲电话We'll call you back. 我们稍后回电She said yes. 她同意了Y ay! ‭C ongratulations! 恭喜你们Mother, I have some good news to share. 母亲我有好消息与你分享We're engaged. 我们订婚啦I am so happy for you two, but I'm not surprised. 我真为你们开心但我一点都不惊讶I've been praying for this. 我为此事祈祷多时了Well, God had nothing to do with it. 这件事上帝没半点功劳It happened because I was kissing another woman, 完全是因为我跟别的女人接了吻and it made me realize I wanted to be with Amy. 令我意识到我想跟艾米共度余生More than one woman was interested in you? 超过一名女性对你有兴趣吗I might have prayed a little too hard. 我可能祈祷太猛了Wait, oh, and I just... 等等我想先...I want to let you know right now 我想现在就跟你说清楚that we are not getting married in a church. 我们不会在教堂里成婚That's all right, Sheldon.没关系谢尔顿Anywhere Jesus is is a church. 耶稣在哪哪便是教堂Well, he won't be at our wedding. 但他不会在我们婚礼上He's in my heart, so if I'm there, 他会在我心里所以只要我人在he'll be there. 他就在Okay, well, then, he's your plus-one. 行那他就是你带的伴Y ou don't get to bring anyone else. 你带人的名额就用完了That's fine. Love you. 没关系爱你Love you, too. Bye. 我也爱你再见Lord, thank you. 主啊谢谢您Even though you can do anything, 虽然您无所不能that was mighty impressive. 但这事真显出了您的无上威能We're engaged. 我们订婚了Oh, my God, that's amazing! 天啊太棒了Wait, uh, tell me everything.慢着快告诉我整个经过Well, Dr. Nowitzki was kissing me... 是这样的诺维茨基博士亲了我Okay, you can stop leading with that part of the story. 你可以别再用这事当故事开头了Well, congratulations. 恭喜你们啊I'm so happy for you two. 太为你们俩高兴了Hold on, I have to tell Bernadette.稍等我得告诉伯纳黛特Hey, Bernie, guess what? 妮妮你猜怎么着Sheldon and Amy got engaged. Can you believe it? 谢尔顿跟艾米订婚啦你敢信吗Oh, my God. I cannot believe it.天啊我真不敢相信She's so happy... I think she's crying. 她好像高兴到... 在喜极而泣啊Do you think Sheldon's gonna want 你觉得谢尔顿会想要办一场some weird Star Trek wedding? 怪胎的《星舰迷航》风婚礼吗I don't know. 我不知道Well, Leonard could barely finish the words 莱纳德当时想说"Doctor Who wedding cake" "《神秘博士》婚礼蛋糕"before I shut that down hard. 还没说完就被我狠狠拒绝Are you listening to me? 你有在听我说话吗Y eah, you're mean to Leonard. I heard you. 有啊你对莱纳德毫无人性我听到了Is everything okay? 你还好吗Look, I'm gonna tell you something, 我要告诉你一件事but you can't freak out, 但你不许惊慌失措because I'm already freaking out. 因为我已经很手足无措了Oh, my God, what is it? 天啊什么事I'm pregnant again. 我又怀孕了Wha... 什...Interesting. 有点儿意思Howard's gonna lose his mind. 霍华德要是知道会疯的Wait, you haven't told him yet? 慢着你还没告诉他吗No. 没有Y ou told me first? Oh, Bernie! 你先告诉了我妮妮小亲亲This wasn't supposed to happen-- we were careful. 这事不应该啊我们很小心的Y eah, I didn't even think you could get pregnant 对啊我本来还以为哺乳期内while you were breastfeeding. 女人是不会怀孕的呢Well, guess what? Y ou can. 结果呢老娘就怀了Okay, look, look, this is a good thing. 好吧听着这是桩好事Halley's gonna have a little brother 这样哈雷就会有个弟弟or sister to play with. 或者妹妹陪她玩了I guess that would be pretty cute. 我想那应该是会挺有爱And, you, know, I was a surprise to my parents, 你知道吗我也是我爸妈的意外之喜and my dad said it was the best thing 我爸说我是发生在他们身上that ever happened to them. 最美好的事Okay. Maybe this baby actually is a blessing. 好吧也许这个宝宝是上天的恩赐Oh, my God, honey, of course it is. 天啊亲爱的当然了How am I pregnant again? 我怎么会又怀上了呢Y eah, what were you thinking? 对啊你搞什么鬼啊All right, I'm all checked in to my flight. 机票确认好了Well, I'm sad you're leaving.你要走了我好难过Why'd you only book a flight for one day? 为什么你订当天来回呢I came here to propose. 我来是为了求婚If you'd said no, I wouldn't want to stick around 要是你拒绝我我可不想looking at your stupid face. 留下来看着你的蠢样Now, mind you, your face is only stupid 是这样的只有你拒绝我的情况下in the "No" version of the story. 你才会是一脸蠢样But I said yes, so I get a lifetime of this. 但我答应了能享用一辈子的你这货Y es, you do, smart face. 是啊机灵鬼Why don't you stay a few extra days? 不如你多待几天吧Well, I don't have any other clothes. 我没带别的衣服We'll get you some. 我们可以去买Oh, I don't know, I'm pretty particular. 不要了吧我这个人很挑的离这儿不到1600米的地方有家漫画店Well, there's a comic book store less than a mile fromhere.Perfect, let's go shopping. 棒买买买对了我今晚要跟同事共进晚餐Oh, um, and I'm having dinner with some colleaguestonight.I'm sure they'd love to meet you. 他们会很高兴见到你的Come on, what do you say? 来嘛好不好A w, you're nagging me. 你开始跟我唠唠叨叨了It's like we're already married. 感觉我们已经结婚了似的Is that a yes or a no? 那到底好不好嘛Geez, save some for the honeymoon. 天啊留点力等蜜月了再叨逼叨吧Look at Nowitzki over there. 瞧那是诺维茨基I can't believe she tried to steal 不敢相信她想从艾米身边Sheldon from Amy. 抢走谢尔顿Y ou know what? 瞧好了I'm gonna go there and tell her that they're engaged now 我要过去告诉她他们订婚了and that her little plan didn't work. 她的小把戏落空了Because you're sticking up for Sheldon, 这是因为你想维护谢尔顿or because you're still mad she rejected you? 还是因为你还在气她拒绝了你Too far away, can't hear you. 距离太远听不到你在讲什么Hello, Ramona. 你好拉蒙娜Hello. 你好Why are you sitting by yourself? 怎么独自一人坐在这呢Oh, that's right, 我知道了Sheldon's in New Jersey being engaged to Amy. 谢尔顿在新泽西他和艾米订婚了I heard. 我听说了Now that Sheldon's out of the picture, 现在谢尔顿闪边去了I could give you one more chance to go out with me. 我可以再给你个机会跟我约会Nope, I'm good. 谢邀不用了Y ou sure? 你确定吗I will not ask again. 小爷可不会再问第二次I sincerely hope not. 我真心希望你不会再问了V ery well. 行吧I'm going to leave before this gets awkward. 那在气氛变尴尬之前我先撤了Want me to make dinner? 要我做晚饭吗Uh, sure, but first, why don't you have a seat? 好啊不过你能先坐下来吗There's something I need to show you. 我有东西给你看Ooh, if it's how to make dinner, that'd be great. 是晚饭教程的话就完美了Is this a... pregnancy test? 这是... 验孕棒吗Y es. 是的That means... positive? 这表示... 阳性吗Y es. 是的No. 不是吧Y es. 是的N-- No. 不不是Y es. 是的No! 别啊How could this even happen? 这怎么可能发生呢Uh, w-- we were careful. 我们这么小心- Well, it did. - ‭N o! -就是发生了-不可能-Y es! Y es! - ‭N o! No! -我不能接受-接受现实吧Okay! Okay! Okay! 好吧好吧行吧Well, w-what are we gonna do? 那我们该怎么办What do you mean what are we gonna do? 什么叫"我们该怎么办"We're gonna have another baby. 我们又要生一个宝宝了- No! No! ‭- Stop that! -不不-别叫了‭- Y es! - No, I'm trying! -就是怀了-我也在试着不叫啊Look, I know it's scary, but... 我知道这感觉很可怕但是we're both responsible adults, we can do this. 我们都是可靠成年人我们能行Y ou really think so? 你真这么想吗No! 不- Hey, Stuart. - ‭O h, hey, Raj. -你好斯图尔特-你好拉杰What can I help you with? 有什么能帮到你的I need to buy an engagement gift. 我要买一份订婚礼物Well, you came to the wrong place. 那你来错地方了It's for Sheldon and Amy. 是送给谢尔顿和艾米的- No way! They're engaged? - ‭Y eah. -不是吧他们订婚了-是的Well, that's exciting news. 真是个令人激动的好消息Who would've thought Sheldon and Amy would be thenext two谁能想到谢尔顿和艾米会是下一对to tie the knot? 喜结连理的呢Tell me about it. I'm the one 可不是嘛我才是那个who caught the bouquet at Leonard and Penny'swedding.在莱纳德和佩妮婚礼上接到捧花的人通常是女生抢捧花\N抢到捧花的人会延续幸福/最快下一个结婚Okay. 好吧Uh... you know, 我看看they might like this. 他们可能会喜欢这个Superman and Wonder Woman, it's kind of romantic. 超人和神奇女侠挺浪漫的Y ou know what? 其实呢Why am I buying them a gift? 我干嘛给他们买礼物They have love. 他们已经拥有爱了Screw them and their happiness. 幸福脱单的都去死吧What do you have for someone who's bitter and alone? 你有没有适合苦逼单身狗的东西Literally everything. 全部都是Sheldon, these are the heads of my research team. 谢尔顿这两位是我研究小组的领导- Oh, hello. - Dr. Zane, Dr. Harris, -你好-赞恩博士哈里斯博士this is my fiancé, Dr. Sheldon Cooper. 这是我未婚夫谢尔顿·库珀博士That's the first time I've said that 我第一次这样叫他and it kind of gave me the goose bumps. 我都荡漾得起鸡皮疙瘩了Dr. Cooper, 库珀博士we are so excited to meet you. 很高兴能见到你Well, that's very kind of you. 太客气了If you'd like, I could autograph your menus after dinner, yeah? 想要的话饭后我可以在你们的菜单上签名But I better not see those on eBay. 但最好别让我发现你们拿去网上拍卖No, no, no, we're just excited to meet the man 不不我们只是很开心能见到who landed this brilliant woman here. 赢得这位才华横溢女士的男人That wasn't hard, 那一点都不难she threw herself at me. 是她倒贴我的Now, getting the universe to show me its naughty bits, 但要让宇宙向我展露"私密"that-that took some doing. 那才需要费一番功夫Sheldon's a physicist. 谢尔顿是物理学家‭O h, that's nice. 挺不错啊Amy, I recently read your paper on lesions 艾米我最近读了你in the olfactory receptors in the brain. 关于嗅觉受体损伤的论文It was inspired. 非常富有创见Oh, well, I guess it didn't stink. 看来水平不算太臭But if it did, that rat wouldn't have known it. 但即使臭了那只老鼠也闻不到‭I'm sorry, 抱歉I'm sure you don't want to sit here 你肯定不想坐在这儿and listen to a bunch of work talk. 听我们聊工作Oh, no, I love it. 不我很喜欢No, but let's talk about work. 我们来聊工作吧Amy's work, my work. 艾米的工作我的工作Y eah, why don't we start with my work? 不如就先聊我的工作吧Actually, I do have a question for Dr. Cooper. 我还真有个问题想问库珀博士When Amy first told you about her approach to synaptic tracing, 艾米首次告诉你她对突触追踪的切入点时did you think it was gonna revolutionize the field? 你有意料到会给这个领域带来巨大变革吗Really? 不是吧That's your question? 你要问的就是这个吗What are you, Entertainment Tonight? 怎么你是综艺节目《今夜娱乐》的人吗Y ou know what? 这样吧Let me give you a better question. Here, 我来给你提供一个更好的问题听着um, "Dr. Cooper, "库珀博士I heard you were working on a top-secret project 听说你正在为美国军方for the U.S. Military. 研究一个机密项目Why don't you tell us about that?" 不如跟我们说说这个吧"See, that's a great question. 这才是个好问题Okay, what was that like? 好吧那项目怎么样Oh, I can't tell you that, it's top-secret. 我不能告诉你那可是最高机密Boy, that was exhausting. 刚才好心累Y ou know, no offense, but your colleagues were prettyrude.无意冒犯但你的同事很无礼Really, they were rude? 是吗是他们无礼吗Y es. 是啊They just kept talking about you and how great you are, 他们只会一直说你的事说你有多了不起no matter how many times I brought me up. 完全无视我多次提起我自己Y ou know, these are my colleagues他们是我的同事and they want to talk about my work. 想谈论我的工作成果Why does that bother you so much? 这有什么好让你不爽的Because I was there. 因为我也在场啊It's like having Optimus Prime over to dinner 就像请《变形金刚》的擎天柱来吃饭and not asking him to turn into a truck. 却不叫他变身卡车一样Y ou know what, Sheldon? 你知道吗谢尔顿Y ou're not always the smartest person in every room. 你并非永远都是房间里最聪明的人Y ou may not even be the smartest person in this room. 你很可能都不是这房间里最聪明的人Oh, I am sorry. 不好意思What, is Neil deGrasse Tyson hiding behind the couch? 难道尼尔·德格拉塞·泰森躲在沙发后面吗著名天体物理学家'Cause if he is, he's not that smart, 如果真是也只证明了他也没多聪明it's pretty dusty back there. 因为后面挺多灰的Hey, where are you going? 你要去哪里I'm storming off to my room. 我要气冲冲地回我的房间Well, then where am I supposed to storm off to? 那我能气冲冲地走去哪儿Well, you're so smart, why don't you figure it out? 你那么聪明怎么不自己想Is there another bedroom? 还有其他卧室吗Perhaps a-a den? 或者小房间之类的So, how are you guys doing with all the new 你们对你子宫里那个新事件events in your womb? 适应得怎么样Good, you know? 挺好的Obviously, it was a surprise. 显然这是个意外惊喜There was some crying and some yelling.发生了一些哭泣和争吵Some suggestion of make-up sex that did not go overwell,有些打和好炮的提议被拒绝了even though it's not like we can get more pregnant. 即使我们并不会怀上加怀But then we realized that it's a gift, in the sense 但我们意识到这是一份礼物that we didn't ask for it, 虽然我们没有主动要求and we may not have chosen it... 也没有主动选择And we already have one. 而且我们已经有一个了Y ou know, whenever I find a top I like, 每当我买到喜欢的衣服I always go back and get a second one in a differentcolor.就会回去再买一件同款不同色的Which I hope is not the case with your baby. 希望你们的宝宝不会是不同色I know you guys are freaked out, but you're great parents, 我知道你们吓坏了但你们是很好的父母and if you ever need help, we are here for you. 你们如果需要帮忙我们随时都在Y eah, anything at all, just ask. 是啊不管什么忙开口就是了Ooh, you know what you could do? 你知道你们能做什么吗Y ou could have a baby, too. 你们可以也生个宝宝I'm sorry, what? 不好意思你说什么No, that's a great idea, we could go through it together. 真是个好主意我们可以一起经历这个过程Wouldn't that be fun? 那一定会很好玩对吧Y ou guys were just saying 你们刚刚才在说how freaked out and miserable you are. 你们有多害怕多凄惨I say a lot of crazy things. 我经常说疯话I'm pregnant and hormonal. 毕竟我怀孕了体内激素发生变化Do it! Have a baby, do it! 快点生个宝宝干起来Come on, it'd be so cute, our kids playing together? 那画面超级萌我们的孩子在一起玩耍What do you say, why don't you two hit the old mattress 怎么样你们俩快去把床单滚起and whip up a family? 赶紧搞出个娃娃来Okay, we're not gonna have a baby 我们才不会为了让你们开心just to make you guys feel better. 就赶紧生孩子呢Y eah, if we're gonna have a baby it's gonna be when we are ready, 想让我俩生孩子除非是我们准备好了or when I'm certain Penny is gonna leave me. 或者我确定佩妮要抛弃我了Exactly. 没错They're my friends, and I should be happy for them. 他们都是我的朋友我应该为他们高兴A-And I'm trying, 我也努力过了but all I feel is this gnawing, empty sensation in my gut. 但我只感到满腹纠结和莫名的空虚I had that once. 我也曾有过这种感觉Turned out it was a tapeworm. 后来发现是我肚子长了绦虫Cool. Uh... 好吧...It's just...it's hard talking to my other friends about this, 只是... 这种事很难跟其他朋友聊but I knew you would understand. 但我想你可以理解我Why is that? 为什么Because you and I are both alone, 因为你和我都是单身狗which is actually kind of comforting, 想想还真是抚慰人心because at least we can be alone together. 至少我们单着的路上有个伴Mm. This is-this is awkward. 这真是太尴尬了I, um, I was actually gonna close up a little early tonight 我今晚本来打算提早关店'cause I have a date. 因为我要去约会Really? 真的吗Y eah. 真的Forgive me if I'm having trouble being happy for you. 请原谅我无法为你感到开心Don't be silly, I'm loving your pain. 傻瓜痛在你身乐在我心Is this how our marriage is going to be? 这会是我俩结婚以后的状态吗Sometimes people will be more interested 有时候人们会更愿意和她说话in talking to her than to me? 而不是和我说话吗Are you sitting in a bathroom? 你现在人在厕所吗Y es. 是的I needed a place to storm off to 我需要一个能让我摔门冲入的地方and it was all that was available.这里是唯一可以的地方Fine. 好吧But if I hear a flush, this conversation is over. 但如果有冲马桶的声音谈话就结束了Those people were in the presence of a world-classmind,这些人都有着世界级水准的智慧and all they wanted to talk about was their ownnonsense.而他们却只想聊那些无聊废话Can you see the irony in that statement? 你能听出其中的讽刺意味吗How about now? 听出来没How about now? 现在呢I'll wait. 我会等待的Surprise. 惊喜Oh, crap, is it our anniversary? 糟了今天是我们的纪念日吗No. Wait. 不等一下No. No. 不不是All right, so what are we celebrating? 好吧那我们到底是庆祝什么事Well, you know, Bernadette and Howard are pregnantagain,你知道博纳黛特和霍华德又怀孕了and Amy and Sheldon are getting married.艾米和谢尔顿也要结婚了I didn't want you to feel left out. 我不想让你感到受冷落Ah. Left out? 什么受冷落吗Well, Bernadette has to grow a baby inside of her, 博纳黛特肚子里要长一个小宝宝and Amy has to marry one. 艾米马上要嫁给另一个小宝宝My life is great. 我的人生非常圆满So do you not want the cake? 所以你不想吃这蛋糕了吗Try and take it away, see what happens. 你把它端走试试看你怎么死Oh, crap, it is our anniversary. 糟了今天真是我们结婚纪念日Happy anniversary! 结婚纪念日快乐Amy. 艾米There's something I need to say to you. 有些事我要告诉你I'm listening. 我听着呢I've been thinking about the A vengers. 我一直在想复仇者联盟I believe that. 我相信But I don't think that's something you needed to say tome.但我觉得这没什么好跟我说的I realized that Iron Man is great. 我意识到钢铁侠超屌And also, that Captain America is great. 但同时美国队长也很不错And sometimes, Iron Man is in a Captain America movie, 有时钢铁侠还会出现在美国队长的电影里and he's not mad it's not an Iron Man movie. 他也不会因为这不是钢铁侠电影而生气Y ou know, he can fly in, give the audience a thrill, 他只是帅气飞来让观众热血沸腾and then fly away. 然后再霸气飞走And that should've been me tonight. 我今夜就应该那么做I should've been the delightful cameo in your movie. 我应该当你电影中的讨喜配角Thank you, Sheldon. 谢谢你谢尔顿Instead, I was like the Hulk, and I... 相反的我表现得像暴怒的绿巨人一样...Okay, please stop talking about the A vengers. 够了请不要再提复仇者联盟了Anyway. 总而言之I'm proud of you. 我为你骄傲And I'm going to try to do a better job 我以后会尽量学习分享目光焦点of sharing the spotlight because we're a team. 因为我们是同一个队的Y ou know? Much like t-the Dodgers. 你懂吗我们就像是棒球道奇队的球员If they had superpowers, and fought crime. 如果他们有超能力会打击犯罪And Thor was in them. 而且雷神索尔也在里面Sheldon, I know this isn't easy, 谢尔顿我知道这很不容易but you'll have a whole lifetime to practice. 但你会有一辈子来慢慢练习I-It could take that long, I'm really bad at it. 也许真的需要这么久我对此非常不在行Y ou know, maybe, um, 也许...I should start right now, and go back to Pasadena 我该从现在开始赶紧回帕萨迪纳and let you have this experience to yourself. 让你好好享受这一切Y ou just want to go back 你就是想回到那个'cause that's where everybody makes a fuss over you. 大家都稀罕你的地方吧Y ou know, your colleagues are right, you are brilliant. 你的同事说得对你真是冰雪聪明3个月后Hello. 你们好呀‭H e y. ‭A my, welcome back. 艾米欢迎回来Oh, l-let me see the ring. 让我看看订婚戒指Ooh, nice. 美死了H-Hey, her eyes are up there. 喂喂别乱看呀I-Is that the woman who kissed Sheldon? 那就是亲了谢尔顿的女人吗- Uh... Could be. - Hard to say. Tell us about Princeton. -有可能-很难说跟我们说说普林斯顿的事Excuse me for a minute. 等我一下Not-- well, we'll catch up later. 不我们待会再聊吧This is going to be the biggest smackdown 这将是自从我的阿姨在家族聚会上since my Aunt Noopur showed up at the family reunion 和我•表姐穿了同样的沙丽之后wearing the same sari as my cousin Sruti. 最大的一次撕逼大战了Dr. Nowitzki? 诺维茨基博士Dr. Fowler. Um, hello. 福勒博士你好Thank you. Thank you so much. 谢谢我衷心谢谢你全家第2集Maybe you should offer it to the pregnant lady. E02或许你该让给怀孕的那位女士And that would be... 那位女士是...Me, Sheldon. 我啊谢尔顿I'm obviously pregnant. 我孕相多明显啊Well, you never said it to my face. 因为你还没当面跟我说过And the last time I assumed a woman was pregnant, 我上一次想当然地认为一名女士怀孕时it did not go over well.结果还挺糟糕的Y eah, I'm still mad at you. 是的我还在生你气呢Y ou were drinking water instead of wine. 你这酒鬼当时居然在喝白开水What was I supposed to think? 我这么想有错吗Sheldon's right. 谢尔顿说得对I would never ask a woman if she was pregnant, 我永远不会问一个女士是不是怀孕unless she tells me or I see a human being 除非是她告诉我或是我看到有人类wiggling out of her. 从她下面被拉出来Well, Sheldon, I'm pregnant. 谢尔顿我怀孕了Congratulations. How far along are you? 恭喜你啊怀孕多久了About three months. 大概三个月吧Only three? 才三个月吗Good gravy, how many babies are in there? 天啊你肚子里是装的是几胞胎啊Okay, let's talk about something 够啦咱们来聊一些that won't infuriate my pregnant wife. 不会让我的孕妻暴怒的话题吧I read an interesting fact about elephants. 我读了一个有关大象的有趣知识Try again. 再换一个Oh, I've got something. 我想到啦I'm being interviewed on public radio this Friday. 这周五我要接受电台访谈啦Oh, cool. How come? 厉害为什么呢Uh, the university is trying to get more funding 大学希望物理系能获得for the physics department, 更多研究资金so they want me to go out and talk it up. 所以就派我出马啊Really? Y ou? 真的吗派你啊Well, they picked the right person for the job. 那他们还真是请对人了Thank you. 真是谢谢啊I think he bought it. 我觉得他信了Hi, I'm Ira Flatow, and this is Science Friday. 欢迎收听《科学星期五》我是艾拉·菲莱知名电台主持人曾在第本剧7季第10集客串过Joining me today is my guest physicist, Dr. Leonard 今天的嘉宾是物理学家莱纳德·霍夫Hofstadter, 斯塔德to talk about all of the exciting research 他要来跟我们聊他在加州理工they're doing at Cal Tech. 所做的那些激动人心的研究Thank you for having me. Whoa... 感谢贵节目给我这个机会...Could never get used to hearing myself in headphones. 还是没办法习惯在耳机里听到自己的声音Is that really how I sound? 我的声音听起来真是这样吗It is. It is. 是的真是That is good to know. 很高兴知道这点I told him his voice was annoying. 我跟他说过他的声音很惹人厌He didn't want to listen. 他就是不听Hey. 喂Y ou're saying it's not? 难道你觉得不烦人吗Just... hey. 就... 喂...So, it has been five years 所以打从五年前since the discovery of the Higgs boson-- 希格斯玻色子被证实存在后what's the next big thing gonna be? 您觉得下一个科学界大事是什么Wow, that's hard to say. 这很难说啊There's so much going on. 有太多大事在发生了We've been collecting tons of data 我们一直在搜集大量的数据that could revolutionize the way we understand the universe. 而这数据有可能颠覆我们对宇宙的理解For instance, there's a particle called a squark, 比如说有个粒子叫超对称性夸克which could prove supersymmetry. 它能证明超对称性That is interesting. Have you found it? 有意思那你们找到了吗- What, the squark? - Y es. -什么那个夸克吗-对啊No, no. 没还没Wouldn't that be exciting? 找到了就神作了But we're also looking for the selectron, 但我们也在试着找出超电子the gluino and the neutralino.胶微子与超中微子都是理论物理学家提出的物理模型中假想的一些粒子\N基本没有切实的实验依据很可能并不存在- Well, and have you found that? - No. -那找到那些了吗-没有Another fun sidenote-- 插个有趣小故事I went to high school with a girl named Theresa Gluino,我我有个高中同学名叫特丽莎·胶微子but it didn't cost $2 billion to find her. 但要找到她并不需要花二十亿She was smoking behind the gym. 她总躲在体育馆后面抽着烟So, what have you found? 那你们发现了什么Uh, nothing, actually.其实什么都没发现Should he be saying that? 他可以说这话吗Uh, probably not. 应该不可以。

Hey, uh, who's free tonight? 今晚谁有空- Oh, I think I'm... - Hang on. -我应该有... -别急We've made this mistake before. 我们犯过这个错误It's how we wound up at his cousin Deepak's Tupperware party.害自己身陷他亲戚迪帕克的特百惠直销派对Hey, you use that collapsible bowl all the time, 当时会上买的折叠碗你少用了吗and you know it. 你自己心里清楚And it's not like that. 而且这次不是那样I just thought we could, you know, hang out and go to a bar. 我只是想我们可以聚一起去酒吧什么的- Sure. - ??Sounds fun. -行吧 -感觉可以And watch cricket. 然后看板球比赛And watch cricket. 板球是印度最流行的运动之一That sound you hear, ironically, crickets. 现在听到的声音很讽刺的也是蟋蟀[板球] Hey, guys. 大伙们Hey, Bert, how you doing? 伯特你好吗Well, you know, 你懂的we geologists always get a little sad when Rocktober's over. 每当"石"月过了我们地质学家都会有点伤心- Wordplay? - Yes. -文字哏吗 -对Funny wordplay? 好笑的文字哏吗What do you think? 你觉得呢Trust your gut. 相信你的直觉Sheldon, I've got these four-billion-year-old meteorites. 谢尔顿我有一些40亿年前的陨石I thought maybe they'd show signs of neutrino interactions.我觉得或许能找到中微子交互作用的痕迹I could really use someone like you 我真的很需要你这样的人才to help me with the math. 来帮忙计算部分Oh, so they would act as natural dark matter detectors.所以它们能当做是天然的暗物质探测器That sounds interesting. 感觉很有意思It does, but it's still geology. 是啊但始终还是地质学Sorry, Bert, I don't have time to play rocks with you. 抱歉了伯特我没空跟你玩石头I'm not asking you to play rocks. 我不是找你来玩石头I'm asking you to collaborate on a research project. 是来找你合作研究项目Although, if there's time, 不过如果有时间I guess we could play a round of zinc, zinc, piece of quartz. 我们可以玩挖矿桌游"矿藏" Does sound better than cricket. 感觉比看板球有意思多了Thank you for asking. 谢谢你的邀请Unfortunately, I have real science to do. 但很抱歉我有真正的科学工作要做But you feel free to rock on. 祝你石石快乐石来运转That's how you do it. 这才叫玩转文字哏All right. 好吧Sheldon, what are you doing? 谢尔顿你这是干嘛呢Bert's one of the top guys in his field. 伯特好歹也是他领域的顶尖人物And somewhere there's a mime who's top in his field, 世上某处也有个哑剧界一霸呢but you don't see me rushing to collaborate with him 你有看到我冲过去跟他合作演出on new ways to be stuck in a box. 新版的被困在空气盒子里表演吗Also something I would watch instead of cricket. 又一个比板球更吸引我的东西Hello. 你好啊Hey, Sheldon. 谢尔顿I've been thinking about it, 我心里琢磨了一阵子and I suppose I-I could help you with your research. 我想我可以来帮忙你的研究What changed your mind? 是什么让你改变了心意Bert, I'm a gift horse. 伯特当人家送你马Don't look me in the mouth. 检查马牙口是很不礼貌的Sorry. I'm happy you want to help out. 是我不好我很高兴你愿意帮忙If it's easier for you, we could just work at your office. 如果这里不方便我们可以去你办公室No, no, no, not my office, no. 不不不不去我办公室Uh, let's-let's do it here, 就在这里吧in-in the evenings, after everyone's gone home. 晚上再开工等大家都回家后I just have to see if my evenings are free. 那我得看看我晚上有没有空That's a joke. They are. 那是玩笑话我有空Okay. Well, then I will see you tonight. 好的那我们今晚见Well, you know what? 其实呢Close the blinds. We can start right now. 关上百叶窗我们现在就能开工I don't get how you can enjoy cricket. 我真不懂板球哪里有趣了It makes no sense. 毫无逻辑可言Did you just come here to complain? 你来就是为了唧唧歪歪吗Yeah. That's the sport of my people. 对啊那是我们犹太人热衷的运动Ooh, that's Ravichandran Ashwin. He's amazing. 那个人是罗微查得兰·阿湿文他超厉害He makes Hardik Pandya look like Bhuvneshwar Kumar.能把哈迪克·庞德亚变得跟波文尼什瓦·库玛一样Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, save some syllables for the rest of us. 喂喂喂给我们其他人取名时留点字用吧Hey, I think that's Bernadette's friend over there. 那边那个好像是伯纳黛特的朋友Oh, yeah. 是啊Hey, Ruchi! 如琪I-I hope this isn't awkward. 希望不会太尴尬The last time we met, I kind of embarrassed myself. 上次我跟她见面我有点丢人Let's see if you can go two for two. 看看你这次会不会也丢人- Hey, guys. - ?Hey. -你们好啊 -你来啦Hi. ?Are you here by yourself? 你自己一个人来吗Yeah, I couldn't convince anyone to come watch cricket with me. 对啊我说服不了任何人来陪我看Tell me about it. I had to drag this guy. 可不是嘛我也是硬拉他来的You're more than welcome to join us if you'd like. 欢迎你加入我们一起看啊Thanks. 谢谢啊Arre uske taang pay ball kar! 阿力乌丝科当配波卡What'd she say? 她说什么Uske taang pay ball kar. 乌丝科当配波卡Oh, that clears that up. 你一说我就"懂"了Well, no, she's telling the bowler to bowl a yorker. 不是啦她是在叫投球手投脚前球It's the most brutal ball in cricket. 是板球里最凶的一种球I was at the match when Shoaib bowled back-to-back yorkers.我去了巴基斯坦球星肖波连投俩脚前球的比赛Well, I was there, too! What a coincidence! 我也去了呢真是缘分啊Well, there were 120,000 people at that match, so... 当时有12万人去看了比赛所以... Yeah, India, right? Everywhere you go, 印度嘛对吧无论去哪里there's, like, 120,000 people. 都有大概12万人左右So what do you think of our chances at the World Cup? 你觉得我们板球世界杯赢的几率如何Ah, World Cup. 世界杯吗You know, it'll all depend if Kohli's batting in form. 全看科利的打击手感好不好了I know. It doesn't even matter how many all-rounders you have. 对啊无论你队伍里多少全能手都没用Isn't that the truth? 可不是嘛You know, I was the best leg spinner in my high school?你知道我是我高中最厉害的旋球投手吗Yeah, like, I bowled the meanest googly. 我投的曲线球最刁钻了Speaking of googlies, I'm gonna go. 说到曲线球... 我要曲线走人了I've been modeling different types of dark matter 我给不同种的暗物质and the traces they would leave 以及它们会在你的陨石里的on the zircon inside your meteorite. 锆石留下的痕迹都建了模What's this one here? 这个是什么That's actually a dark matter model of my own creation. 是我个人独创的暗物质模型I call it the Cooper boson. 我取名为库珀玻色子Cool. I got to name a rock once. 厉害我也曾有机会给石头命名I named it Moderately Sedimented Shale. 我取名为中等沉积页岩Guess I kind of pooped the bed on that one. 那个名字我可能取得挺屎You know, Bert, I've got to say, 伯特我不得不说this work has been surprisingly engaging. 这研究出乎意料地让我乐在其中Yeah, it's pretty cool. 对啊挺酷的Hello, Amy. 艾米What do you mean, where am I? 什么叫我在哪里I'm in my office. 我在我办公室啊No, I'm at your office and you're not here. 才没有我在你办公室外你不在I thought I'd surprise you with dinner. 我本来想给你惊喜带了晚饭来For future reference, the best surprises 以后请记得最好的惊喜are the ones I know about three days in advance. 是我提前三天就先知情的那种Where are you? 你到底在哪It's a surprise. Doesn't feel so good, does it? 也是个惊喜感觉不好受是吧Well, I have food. 我有吃的I thought we could eat together, 我本来是想找你一起吃but I guess if you have other plans... 但如果你有其他的安排...What?! I'm here! 什么我在这里啊Exactly where I said I was. 就在我跟你说的地点Let's eat. 开吃吧Hello. 你们好啊Hey, buddy, what's up? 你来啦怎么了Um, I need to talk to Penny alone. 我需要跟佩妮单独聊聊What can I do for you? 有何能为您效劳Just a minute, I want to make sure Leonard can't hear us. 稍等一下我得确定莱纳德听不到I've got a box of cupcakes. 我带了一盒小蛋糕Okay, we're good. 没问题了I'm working with Bert, but I don't want anyone to find out. 我跟伯特合作了但我不想别人知道Well, you just told me, so strong start. 你已经泄露给我了好的开始啊Penny, this is serious. 佩妮事关重大My reputation is on the line. 我的名誉悬于一线What are people gonna think when they see us collaborating? 其他人看到我们合作会怎么想啊I don't know. Poor Bert? 不知道呢觉得伯特很可怜吧I am a respected theoretical physicist. 我是一名德高望重的理论物理学家I aspire to win a Nobel Prize someday. 我立志有一天得到诺贝尔奖But nobody's gonna take me seriously 但要是其他人发现我涉足地质学if they find out I've been dabbling in geology. 就不会把我当回事了Well, why not? They're both sciences. 为什么这两种都是科学啊And I know because they're classes 而我会知道是因为my high school counselor said "weren't for me." 我高中的辅导员说这两门课"不适合我" They're very different. 这两者差别极大Physics answers the question: 物理学解答了what is the nature of the universe? 宇宙的本质是什么Geology answers the question: what'd I just trip over? 地质学解答了我刚才是被什么绊倒了All right, well, then don't work with Bert. 好吧那就别跟伯特合作呗- Oh, but I like the work. - Then work with him. -但我喜欢那研究 -那就跟他合作Yeah, but I'm ashamed of the field. 可我觉得那个领域很丢人- Then don't work with him. - Yeah, but we could prove dark matter. -那别合作了 -但我们也许能证明暗物质- Then work with him. - But I just think that people... -那就合作吧 -但我觉得其他人... How many times are you gonna do this? 你还要这样纠结多少遍My record is 14. 我的记录是14遍Okay, this is about science. 这是跟科学有关的事Why'd you come to me? 你为什么来问我Well, because it's also about my reputation. 因为这也跟我的名誉有关And somehow you manage to hold your head high 而你虽然有着错综复杂的过去despite your checkered past. 但现在仍保有谜之自信Checkered past? 错综复杂的过去It's a figure of speech 这是个比喻referring to how sexually promiscuous you were. 形容你以前作风不检点Really? 真的吗Well, I've got a figure of speech about 我也有句话比喻how sexually promiscuous you can go be with yourself. 你可以"去你的"房间跟自己不检点And what is it? 什么话Look, while Bernadette's on bed rest, 在伯纳黛特卧床休息期间we're gonna have to divide and conquer. 我们必须分而治之I've got one monitor for her, one for the baby. 这两个监视器一个监视她一个监视宝宝Which do you want? 你想要哪个I'll take the baby. She's less emasculating. 我选宝宝的吧她没那么欺负人Good morning! 早上好- Scones? - ?Ah, thanks. -吃司康饼吗 -好啊谢谢They're all for you; I already had breakfast at Ruchi's. 这是买给你们的我已经在如琪家吃过早餐了You're kidding. You slept with her? 不会吧你跟她睡了吗Well, there wasn't a lot of sleeping involved. 倒是没有多少时间在睡觉啦I mean, she slept, I stayed awake. 我意思是她睡了我醒着I was afraid of snoring 'cause I didn't have my special pillow. 我怕打呼因为我没带我的特殊防打鼾枕Howard! 霍华德Can you help me to the bathroom?! 过来扶我去洗手间Well, at least the romance is still alive. 至少我们之间浪漫还没死绝So, you and Ruchi? 你和如琪啊Yeah, I'm sorry. I know you liked her, too, 对抱歉我知道你也喜欢她but we just bumped into each other last night and hit it off. 但我们昨晚碰到了聊得擦出火花No, that's fine. 不没关系You're my friend and I'm happy for you. 你是我的朋友我为你高兴Oh, thank you, Stuart. 谢谢你斯图尔特Plus, I don't know how you're gonna screw it up, 再说了虽然我不知道你会怎么搞砸but I know you will. 但我知道你终究会搞砸What's there to screw up? 有什么好搞砸的She just wants to keep things casual. 她只是想随意一点Oh, great, that's how you're gonna screw it up. 太好了这就是你会搞砸的原因Hey, I can be casual. 我也可以很随意啊I should get a haircut; this thing's going south fast. 我得赶紧去理个发这段关系很快就会玩完So Ruchi and I decided to keep things casual. 我和如琪决定让感情随意发展What? What? 怎么了I can handle casual. 我也可以只动鸡不动心Why do you keep doing that with your face? 你为什么一直做出那个嘴Because you keep saying stupid things with yours. 因为你嘴里一直吐出蠢话Okay, fine. 好吧I'm not great at casual relationships, 我的确不擅长随意的恋爱关系and I don't want to scare her off. 但我不想把她吓跑All right, just give her some space, all right? 给她一点空间就行了Don't call, don't text, don't e-mail. 别打电话别发短信别发邮件That's crazy. 那怎么行What if I see a sunset that reminds me of her? 要是我看到夕阳想起她时怎么办All right, when do you see her next? 你们下一次见面是什么时候Uh, we're having dinner tonight. 我们今晚一起吃晚餐Okay, put a rubber band around your wrist, 好在手腕上绑一根皮筋and any time you start planning your wedding 每次你开始策划你们的婚礼or naming your children, 或是给你们的孩子取名时I want you to stab yourself in the hand with a fork. 你就用叉子扎自己的手What's the rubber band for? 那皮筋是用来干嘛的To slow the bleeding. 用来减缓失血Hey, how's Bernadette handling bed rest? 伯纳黛特卧床休息得怎么样了She lies around all day 她整天都躺在床上eating Mallomars and hollering at me, 吃吃巧克力对我大声嚷嚷so her transformation from my wife to my mother is complete.她从我老婆转变为我妈的过程已经完成了Congratulations. I know that's what you were hoping for. 恭喜我知道你就盼着这一天Sheldon, you left your jacket in my office last night. 谢尔顿你昨晚把外套落在我办公室了Uh, oh. No-no, I didn't. 我没有我才没有That's-that's not my jacket. 那外套都不是我的Then why does it say, 那上面怎么写着"Property of S. Cooper. Stop touching it"? "谢·库珀所有物别碰"It sounds like someone named Scooper 听起来某个叫谢库珀的人doesn't want you touching his jacket. 不希望你碰他的外套Are you guys working together on that meteorite project? 你们是在合作研究那个陨石项目吗Yes, fine, you found me out. 是的好吧被你们发现了I'm doing geology. 我现在玩地质学了Just, please, don't tell anyone. 拜托千万别说出去Are you embarrassed of me? 你觉得我很丢人吗Oh, no, no, no, not you. 不不不不是你No, just the work that you've devoted your entire life to. 只是你毕生所投身于的研究事业If you're ashamed to be working with me, 如果你觉得和我合作很丢人then I don't want to work with you. 那我也不想和你合作Sheldon, that was pretty rude. 谢尔顿刚才真的很过分Well, what do you expect? He's a geologist. 他过分不很正常吗毕竟是个地质学家This place seems nice. 这地方挺高级的Uh, but not too nice. 也不算很高级Yelp called it "Good for groups." 点评网说这儿"适合聚会"Would you care to buy the lady a...? 你想为这位女士买...No! Get out of here! 不要走开Sorry about that. 抱歉I just, I hate when someone assumes two people are dating 我很讨厌有人擅自认为别人在交往just because they look like 就因为他们看起来they would make beautiful babies together. 能制造出可爱美丽的宝宝Are you sure you're okay with this? 你确定你能接受这样的关系吗Honestly, Ruchi, I don't have a lot of experience 老实说如琪我在随意的男女关系这方面with casual relationships. 经验不多I have some experience with serious relationships 我在认真的男女关系方面略有经验and a ton of experience with no relationships. 在没有男女关系方面经验超多You're funny. 你真幽默Glad it came off that way. 你这么认为我就放心了Uh, so tell me about your day. 说说你今天过得怎么样How's work going? 工作进行得如何Well, I spent the morning reviewing side effects for our fungal cream,我一早上都在研究那款真菌乳膏的副作用so it was a lot of ooze and pus. 看了很多流脓和分泌物♪ Almost paradise ♪ ♪ 宛如天堂 ♪♪ Almost paradise ♪ Almost paradise - Mike Reno/Ann Wilson♪ We are knocking on heaven's door ♪ ♪ 天堂之门我们触手可及 ♪♪ Almost paradise ♪ ♪ 宛如天堂 ♪And then I had to catalog it 然后我得把它们归类by color, viscosity 按照颜色黏度and percentage of blood. 以及血液百分比Sounds wonderful. 听起来很美妙What you got there? 那是什么A rock. 一块石头Did some mean boys throw it at you? 是某个恶毒的小男孩砸你的吗It turns out I'm the mean boy. 事实证明我就是那个恶毒的小男孩Although I did drop it on my own foot, so kind of. 不过我的确有砸到自己的脚所以你没说错What's going on? 出什么事了What if there was something I wanted to do, 如果我想做一件事but I was worried other people would think less of me? 但又怕别人会看不起我怎么办Is that other person me, and does it happen in the bedroom, 如果别人是指我而你想做的是卧室中的事in which case I think I'm cool with it? 那我觉得放马过来No. 不是It's about working with Bert on... 我是指和伯特一起...You know what? I'm not even gonna say it. 算了我都说不出口I am just gonna say the letter it starts with 我就小小地透露一下这个词的第一个字and "Ology." 和最后一个字"学""G"-- Oh, no, that's not gonna work. "地" 哎呀我都剧透完了Geology? 地质学吗Yes. But we parted ways 没错但我们散伙了because I was worried about my reputation. 因为我担心自己的名誉受损Sheldon, you've never cared what people thought, 谢尔顿你从来都没在意过别人的看法even when you really, really should. 即使在你真的应该在意的时候That dinner with my parents comes to mind. 比如上次和我父母吃饭的时候If I'm not gonna use "Your momma" jokes 如果和你妈见面时when I meet your mother, why'd I bother to learn them? 不能开"你老母"的玩笑那我去学了干嘛I'm just saying, if you think the work is interesting, 我只是想说如果你觉得项目有趣nothing else should matter. 那就不需要考虑其他的事情You're right, Amy. 你说得对艾米That is sage advice. 这真是金玉良言Which is surprising, considering your momma is so dumb, she... 真是神奇毕竟你老母那么笨...Nope. 滚She studied for a urine test. 笨到尿液"检验"都得读书I was supposed to go back to India and get married, 我本来应该回印度结婚的but I realized it wasn't what I wanted. 但我意识到这不是我想要的So I called off the engagement and moved out here. 所以我取消了订婚搬到了这里Well, if he wasn't your soul mate, he wasn't your soul mate. 如果他不是你的灵魂伴侣那他就不是对的人Oh, God, please tell me you're not one of those. 天啊拜托你千万不要是那种人One of whats? 哪种人I want to say teenage girls, but that sounds mean. 我想说少女心的小女孩但好像太毒了Come on, you don't believe that everyone has one perfect match?你不相信每个人都有命中注定的另一半吗Of course not. That's ridiculous. 当然不信了太荒唐了I mean, what if your soul mate lived halfway across the world?万一你的灵魂伴侣住在地球的另一半呢You'd never meet. 那你就永远见不到了Yes, you would. 你当然能见到I can give you, like, 20 examples 我可以给你随便举20个例子where that happened to Kate Hudson alone. 那还只是发生在凯特·哈德森一个人身上的where that happened to Kate Hudson alone. 美国女演员浪漫爱情喜剧专业户You know what? 算了吧People get upset when I talk about this. 每次我说起这个都会惹别人不高兴Let's just change the subject. 我们还是换个话题吧No, no, no. No, it's-it's fine. 不不不没关系Are you saying that you don't believe two people fall in love?所以你不相信两个人会真心相爱吗Of course they do. 他们当然会啊It's just that what people call "Love" 只不过人们所谓的"爱"is actually a series of biochemical reactions 其实是大脑中的一系列化学反应作祟in the brain that fade over time. 会随着时间流逝而消逝Yes. Like the old song, 没错就像那首老歌唱的Yes. Like the old song, 迈克尔·波顿名曲《当男人爱上女人》"When a man has a biochemical reaction for a woman." "当男人化学反应上女人"Raj, we're scientists. 拉杰我们都是科学家We don't need to feel threatened just because we understand 就算我们了解恋爱产生的机制the mechanisms that give rise to romantic feelings. 我们也不需要觉得害怕It doesn't take anything away from the experience. 这对恋爱的体验没有任何的影响Yes, it does. 当然有影响了Actually, it takes everything away from it. 老实说这完全毁掉了恋爱的感觉Love isn't just science. 爱情不仅仅是科学Okay? It's-it's spiritual. 它更是精神上的It's an acknowledgment of a mystery 那是一种令人捉摸不定的that's greater than ourselves. 神秘体验It's what makes people write songs and poems, 是爱让人们吟诗颂曲and what has kept The Bachelor on TV for 21 magical seasons.让《黄金单身汉》真人秀精彩了21季Don't you think the fact that love is given away as a prize你不认为在游戏节目中把爱作为奖品送出去on a game show slightly undermines your argument? 正好削弱了你的观点吗Uh, yes. 没错But I've never missed an episode, 但我一集都没落下and I dare science to explain that. 你能用科学解释这件事吗Bert. 伯特Bert, Bert. 伯特伯特Bert, Bert, Bert. 伯特伯特伯特What do you want, Sheldon? 你想干嘛谢尔顿I would like us to work together again. 我希望咱们能重新一起工作I promise to keep my geology comments to myself, 我保证不再乱发表地质学的言论because while some of them are funny, all of them are mean. 因为这些言论都太过分了虽然有些很好笑Well, this is awkward. 这下就尴尬了Leonard, what are you doing here? 莱纳德你在这里干什么Bert asked for my help. 伯特请我帮个忙Yeah, he's an excellent scientist, 他是一个优秀的科学家and he doesn't tell me what time I can go to the bathroom. 也不规定我上厕所的时间It's called bladder training. 我那是膀胱训练When you're in your 80s, you'll thank me for it. 等你到了80岁你会感谢我的Look, Sheldon, you were a jerk to Bert, 听着谢尔顿你对伯特不好and he walked away from you. 所以他不和你玩了So I feel like there's a lot he could teach me. 我觉得我可以向他好好讨教一番Bert, please. 伯特拜托I know I behaved poorly in the past, 我知道自己之前表现不太好but things will be different this time. 但这次我保证会有所改变You'll see. 你会看到的Come on, let me in. 拜托让我进来吧We'll have some laughs, 我们会一起欢笑we'll calculate some isotope ratios. 一起计算同位素比值I'm sorry, Sheldon. 抱歉谢尔顿So you just shut the door in his face? 你就这样让他吃闭门羹吗I got to start writing this stuff down. 我得开始记录下你的招数了I mean, Ruchi's nice. 虽然如琪是个好人We're just so different. 但我俩太不同了I know. Sometimes when you're dating, 我懂你有时候约会you meet weird people. 都会碰到奇奇怪怪的人I once met a girl who didn't like juggling. 我之前还约过一个不喜欢杂耍的女孩呢And she still doesn't. 她现在依旧不喜欢So you're not gonna see her again? 所以你们不会再见面了吗What's the point? 还有什么意义呢We're never gonna be in a real relationship. 我俩永远不会谈恋爱Right, so you'll only be in a physical one? 所以你俩只能是肉体关系吗Exactly. 没错Why would I want to spend time with someone like that? 我干嘛和那种人耗费时间Someone who is just interested in sex? 那种只对滚床单有兴趣的人吗Yeah. 没错- Raj, do you real... ?- Whoa, hold on. -拉杰你好好... -等一下Give him a chance. He's gonna get this. 给他一点时间他会想通的I don't think he is. 我觉得他不会What is there to get? 有什么可想的She doesn't want to fall in love. 她不想和人坠入爱河At that point, 这样的话all we are is two single people 我们只是两个单身人士who find each other attractive and enjoy having-- 互相看得上眼也喜欢做...Oh, got to go! 我得走了So how was your night with Ruchi? 你和如琪昨晚如何Oh, great. 很好We ordered in some food, we had sex, I left. 我们点了外卖滚了床单然后拍屁股走人I didn't even ask if she enjoyed it. 我甚至不用问她爽不爽I can field that one for her. 这道题我可以替她回答了I mean, I did get a little misty when we said good-bye, 我道别时的确有点小哽咽but I played it off as allergies. 不过我假装自己过敏了I don't know if she bought it. 不知道她相信没Again, I know. 再一次我知道答案Sheldon? 谢尔顿You okay? 你还好吧Sheldon. 谢尔顿。

第一季3集: The Fuzzy Boots Corollary-Howard：All right, just a few more feet. And...非常好，再前进几步...here we are, gentlemen, the gates of Elzebob. 准备好，先生们，Elzebob大门到了。

gentlemen: n. （gentleman的复数形式）绅士,先生gate：门-Sheldon：Good lord. 上帝啊。

lord:上帝-Leonard：Don't panic. This is what the last 97 hours have been about. 别慌，坚持97小时的战斗就为了这一刻。

panic：恐慌last：a. 最后的,末尾的,最近的,晚了，迟到了;v. 持续,支持,维持ad. 最后,后来-Howard：Stay frosty. There's a horde of armed goblins on the other side of that gate guarding the sword of Asaroth. 待着别动，一群装备武器的地妖精，正在门的另一边，守卫着艾辛诺斯之刃。

frosty：冷淡的 a horde of：一群armed：武装的goblin：恶魔，小妖精guard：保护，监护sword：剑-Leonard：Warriors, unsheathe your weapons. Magic wielders, raise your wands. 战士们，拔出你们的武器，法师们，举起你们的魔杖。

warriors：武士，战士unsheathe；抽出鞘，拔出weapons：武器magic：魔术的wielders：行使者raise：举起wands：棍，棒-Sheldon：Lock and load. 准备好了。

【Lock and load 这是一句常用的美国口语，荷枪实弹，准备好的意思】-Howard：Raj, blow the gates. Raj，推开大门。

Scene: The apartmentSheldon: Why hast thou forsaken me, O deity whose existence I doubt?Policeman: Here. Breathe into this bag.Leonard: What’s going on?Sheldon: They stole everything, Leonard, everything.Policeman: Are you the roommate?Leonard: Yeah, Leonard Hofstadter. What happened?Policeman: Your friend here called 911 to report a robbery.Leonard: Oh, my God, what did they get?Sheldon: What didn’t they get? They got my enchanted weapons, my vicious gladiator armour, my wand of untainted power, and all my gold.Leonard: You called the police because someone hacked your World of Warcraft account? Sheldon: What choice did I have? The mighty Sheldor, level 85 blood elf, hero of the Eastern kingdoms, has been picked clean, like a carcass in the desert sun. Plus, the FBI hung up on me. Policeman: Into the bag.Sheldon: They took my battle ostrich.Leonard: Oh, no, not Glenn?Sheldon: Yes, Glenn! The only bird I ever loved.Policeman: Good luck, fellas.Leonard: Thank you, officer.Sheldon: Wait a m inute! You’re not going to do anything?Policeman: Mr. Cooper, there’s nothing…Sheldon: Doctor Cooper.Policeman: Seriously?Leonard: Not the kind with access to drugs.Policeman: Fine. Dr. Cooper. I’m sorry for your loss, but the Pasadena Police Departme nt doesn’t have jurisdiction in Pandora.Sheldon: That’s from Avatar, World of Warcraft takes place in Azeroth. Goodness gracious, how are you allowed to carry a gun? Can you at least refer me to a rogue ex-cop?Policeman: What?Sheldon: You know, one who was drummed off the force because he refused to play by the rules, and now he hires himself out to impose his own brand of rough justice?Policeman: No.Leonard: Thank you, officer.Sheldon: It’s all gone. All gone.Leonard: I’m really sorry, Sheldon.Sheldon: What kind of world do we live in, where a man would take another man’s battle ostrich? Leonard: I don’t know.Sheldon: This act of aggression must be met with swift and cruel ferocity. It is time to cry havoc, and let slip the dogs of war.Leonard: I’m on it. (On phone) Hi, Mrs. Wolowitz. Is, is Howard there? Okay, thanks. That particular dog of war will have to call you back after his bath.Sheldon: See if Raj is done with Pilates.Credits sequence.Scene: The apartment.Sheldon: Three thousand hours. Three thousand hours clicking on that mouse, collecting weapons and gold. It’s almost as if it was a huge waste of time.Howard: Whoever did this knew what they were doing. He got in and out of your account in under 15 minutes, transferred all your stuff, and didn’t leave a digital fingerprint.Sheldon: Oh! There isn’t enough camomile tea in the world to quell the rage in my heart.Raj: Hold on. I’m talking to an orc under the bridge in Thunder Bluff who says if we pay him, he’ll help us track down y our things.Sheldon: Can we trust him?Raj: I should say so, he appears to be a member of the Nigerian royal family.Howard: Whoa! Somebody’s auctioning off a jewelled ostrich bridle!Sheldon: No. Glenn’s was leather. He was a simple ostrich. Is! Is, I haven’t given up hope.Penny: Hey.Leonard: Hey, Penny. We’re kind of in the middle of a crisis, here.Penny: Oh, I know. Bernadette told me. Sorry, Sheldon. I know that game meant a lot to you.Sheldon: That game? Excuse me, Penny, but Doodle Jump is a game. Angry Birds is a game. World of Warcraft is a massively multi-player online role-playing… all right, technically it’s a game.Raj: Bad news, the Nigerian prince may be a fraud.Penny: Okay, well, anyways, I brought you a day-old cheesecake to cheer you up!Sheldon: Stale pastry is hollow succour to a man who is bereft of ostrich.Penny: Just say thank you.Sheldon: I thought I just did.Penny: All right. See you later.Priya: Oh! Hello.Penny: Oh, hi! I was just dropping off a cheesecake to Sheldon. He was robbed of a bunch of imaginary crap that’s useful in a make-believe place.Priya: I don’t know what that means.Penny: Yeah, well, sadly, I do.Scene: Penny’s apartment.Penny: Did you know last weekend Priya took Leonard rollerblading at the beach? Can you believe that?Bernadette: I feel like I’m supposed to say that bitch, but I don’t have enough information. Penny: I am the one who spent two years trying to get him to even go to the beach in the first place. And he was so phobic about stepping on medical waste, I had to carry him to the water. Bernadette: I took Howard to the beach once. He almost burst into flames like a vampire. Penny: So what’s the thanks I get for turning Leonard into quality boyfriend material? I have to tiptoe around his new girlfriend.Amy: I think you’re on.Bernadette: Oh. That bitch!Penny: Want some coffee liqueur on your ice cream?Amy: Ah, here’s the alcohol and drug peer pressure Mother warned me about. I was starting to think it was never going to happen. Yes, please.Pen ny: You guys should’ve seen Leonard when I first met him. There was no eye contact. He was either looking up at the ceiling, or down at his shoes.Amy: I’m drunk.Penny: You know, for the first couple of months, whenever I would take off my bra, he would giggle and say, oh boy, my breast friends.Bernadette: Well, if it makes you feel any better, I’m never speaking to Priya again.Penny: No, don’t do that. No reason to be mean to her.Amy: This may be the alcohol talking, but I believe there is. Are you familiar with the recent study of Tanzanian chimpanzees by Nishida and Hosaka out of Kyoto University?Penny: No, but I can name all the Kardashians.Amy: Primates, such as ourselves, have a natural instinct to ostracize ill-mannered members of the troop. Ber nadette’s urge to shun, scowl or fling her waste at Priya is hard-wired into her DNA.Bernadette: I don’t have an urge to fling my waste.Amy: Believe me, it’s there, we all have it. Hit me with some more booze, and I’ll show you. Scene: The apartmentHoward: All right, here we are, this is the tavern where all the black-market weapon trades go down.Raj: I don’t think my character should be in a place like this. Everyone’s undressing her with their eyes.Howard: Maybe if you stop dropping your sword and bending over to pick it up.Leonard: Okay, what exactly are we looking for?Howard: Redheaded troll, goes by the name of Glumly. According to the message boards, if you want to move stolen goods and it’s after school hours, he’s your guy.Priya: Leonard, is this going to take much longer? I thought we were going to spend some time together.Leonard: Uh, we are. In the meantime, you’re welcome to whip up a quick character and join us. Priya: Seriously?Leonard: Well, you have to put in a credit card number, bu t it’s fun.Priya: Maybe I should just go home.Howard: Our troll just walked in! I got him!Leonard: We got him. We’re almost done.Howard: So, how do you guys want to play this?Sheldon: Be ruthless. You tell him if he doesn’t start talking, we’ll regist er a complaint with his Internet service provider.Raj: Sheldon, what if he gets his Internet from his cable company? He could lose his HBO and all their delightful original programming.Sheldon: I don’t care! I’m losin’ it, man!Leonard: Why don’t we play this smart? Try a little good goblin, bad goblin.Priya: Oh, dear Lord.Howard: Nah, I think we have to be more subtle.Raj: Okay, I see where this is going. Fine, I’ll have sex with him.Leonard: That’s not where it was going.Raj: Good, because I would hate that.Priya: Leonard, you’re busy, let’s talk tomorrow.Leonard: Oh, wait. Hang on. Are you upset?Priya: No, no, I think it’s sexy to date a boy trapped in a man’s body.Leonard: Good, good. I’ll tell you what happens.Sheldon: And people think I don’t get sarcasm.Scene: The hallway.Amy: Well, well, well. Look who it is.Penny: Okay, be nice.Priya: Hello.Penny: Hi. We’re just heading out for a drink.Amy: Because I do that now.Bernadette: Count your blessings you’re not a Tanzanian chimp.Priya: What?Penny: Don’t listen to her, she’s had a lot of ice cream. Do you want to join us? Priya: Oh, thank you, but I have work to do.Amy: Four women walk down the stairs, how many reach the lobby?Scene: The cafeteria.Leonard: Did your sister say anything when you got home last night?Raj: Oh, no, don’t put me in the middle of this. I’m not going to be your go-between. Leonard: Come on, help me out. Am I in trouble?Raj: There’s no reason to worry.Leonard: That’s a relief.Raj: I’m sure many women in hap py relationships spend their nights skyping with their ex-boyfriend Sanjay.Howard: Good news, gentlemen, I found our hacker.Sheldon: What?Leonard: Really?Howard: Yeah. No one can hide from me, not Waldo, not Carmen San Diego, not even topless Natalie Portman.Sheldon: I’ve never said these words before, but good job, Howard!Howard: Thanks. Our culprit is one Mr. Todd Zarnecki, 2711 Ocean View Road, Carlsbad, California.Sheldon: The name and the address drip with evil.Raj: What else do we know about him?Howard: Well, quite a bit, actually.Leonard: I’ll bet he’s some loser who lives with his parents.Howard: Yes, he does live with his parents. Here’s a Google Earth shot of their house. Sheldon: Excellent! It’s in a cul-de-sac. We can box him in.Leona rd: Hold on, you’re thinking of going there?Sheldon: Carlsbad is only a couple of hours away.Leonard: Fine. You walk up to the house, knock on the door and demand your stuff back. What if he says no?Sheldon: I don’t know if you’ve been following the new s, Leonard, but there have been some terrific advancements in the field of torture.Leonard: No one’s getting tortured.Sheldon: Fine, we’ll abide by the Geneva Convention. But ask yourself this, in the course of our lives, how much lunch money has been taken from us? How many kites? How many Scooby-Doo Trapper Keepers?Raj: I totally had one of those.Sheldon: Of course you did. It was a fun and practical way of organizing your school work. But the bullies took it from us. Well, no more. Tonight, we take back our dignity, our birthright and our pride. What do you say? Who’s with me?Raj: I have a hip-hop aerobics class at five, could we go after?Sheldon: Sure.Howard: Also, tonight’s the Sabbath and my mother and I have a tradition of lighting the candles andwatching Wheel of Fortune, so If we could leave at eight, we’d still be able to regain our birthright at ten, ten thirty latest.Sheldon: Fine. Leonard?Leonard: Oh, geez, I don’t know if I can ditch Priya two nights in a row.Raj: Oh, come on, man. B ros before… my sister.Leonard: Aw, screw it. I’m in.Raj: Me, too.Howard: And me.Sheldon: One moment. (Places a tissue on their hands before adding his own) I’m hell-bent on catching a cyber criminal, not the common cold.Scene: Howard’s houseSheldon: I’m sorry, I thought this delay was so you could watch Wheel of Fortune with your mother.Howard: I am. She’s just bleaching her moustache. Check it out. Hey, Ma! Before and After! Four words, 17 letters, two N’s, one V.Howard’s Mother (off): Fanny pack of wolves.Leonard: That’s incredible.Howard: Yeah, she’s kind of a Wheel savant.Leonard (phone rings): Uh-oh, that’s Priya.Raj: Sitar music for her ringtone is not cool, dude.Leonard: Hit the… Hey, sweetie. Yeah, I’m sorry. I’m gonna be working late. I, I, I miss you, too. Okay, sure, I’ll call you when I get home. Okay, bye-bye.Raj: Very nice. You lie to my sister.Howard: That’s the nicest thing he does to your sister.Raj (phone rings): Oh, guess who.Leonard: Cover for me.Raj: Hello, Priya. What’s up? How would I know if Leonard’s at work or not? Don’t be suspicious. Look, if you want your relationship with Leonard to continue, you’re going to have to believe whatever wild-eyed, cockamamie excuse the white devil has the nerve to offer you. Okay? Yeah, bye-bye. You owe me.Howard: New puzzle, Ma. Same name. One N, two D’s, three O’s.Howard’s Mother (off): Whoopi and Rube Goldberg!Sheldon: That’s uncanny.Howard: I know. It’s her superpower. Well, that and jiggling her arm fat.Scene: Leonard’s car.Leonard: I can’t believe we’re going all the way to San Diego to confront this guy.Howard: Yeah, we’re kind of bad-asses, aren’t we?Leonard: Totally.Raj: Hey, how about we stay the night and hit Legoland in the morning?Sheldon: S ea World is better. It has Shamu, who is literally tons of fun. But for the moment, let’s stay focused on Todd Zarnecki.Raj: Yeah, we’re coming for you, Todd Zarnecki. And for the record, Legoland is more interactive.Sheldon: I almost feel sorry for the poor fool, sitting in his split-level suburban ranch, unaware that a vengeful horde is barrelling down the San Diego Freeway at 71 miles an hour. Ease up there, lead foot. You trying to get us killed?Raj: I took the liberty of burning us a mix of heroic questing music.Sheldon: This says Beyonce Bootylicious Dance Mix.Raj: It’s a re-writable CD. Just put it in.Howard: Beyonce? Really?Raj: She’s curvy and she owns it. I like that.Leonard (as Ride of the Valkyries begins): Oh, yeah, I’m feeling it.Sheldon: We are winged fury! Which is still no excuse for going over the posted speed limit. Scene: Stuck in a traffic tailback.Howard: Next time we go to kick someone’s ass, we take the train.Sheldon: I always prefer the train.Scene: Outside Todd Zarnecki’s house.Leonard: Sheldon, let’s go.Sheldon: Coming.Howard: Why did you bring that?Sheldon: No weapon strikes more fear into a man’s heart than a Klingon bat’leth. Leonard: Okay, let’s get clear on something. We’re just going to tell this guy to transfer all of your stuff back into your account and then be on our way. No one’s bat’lething anybody. Sheldon: So my blade shall not taste blood tonight?Leonard: No.Sheldon: Well, now I just feel silly holding it.Leonard: Come on.Sheldon: Can I at least kick down the door?Leonard: You’re welcome to try, but the other day, it took you 15 minutes to get into a FedEx box. (Rings bell)Voice Inside: Who is it?Sheldon: Your doom!Raj: Don’t say your doom. Who opens the door for their doom?Sheldon: Good point. Basket of puppies.Huge man (opening door): What?Leonard: Uh, Sheldon?Sheldon: Are you Todd Zarnecki?Todd: Yeah. Who are you?Sheldon: I am Sheldor of Azeroth. I want my things back.Todd: I don’t think so. Let me see that.Sheldon: Careful. That’s a col lectible.Todd: I know. I’ve always wanted one. (Closes door)Sheldon: Well, he’s even more cunning than we thought.Scene: Leonard’s car.Sheldon: You know, the joke’s on him. Without the certificate of authenticity, that bat’leth is worthless.Howard: Yeah, he walked right into our trap.Raj: Legoland seems like a hollow dream now.Leonard: Oh-oh.Raj: What’s the matter?Leonard: Something’s wrong, I’m not getting any gas. Anybody know anything about internal combustion engines?Sheldon: Of course.Raj: Very basic.Howard: 19th-century technology.Leonard: Does anybody know how to fix an internal combustion engine?Sheldon: No.Howard: No, not a clue.Leonard: Well, we’d better call somebody to come pick us up.Sheldon: It’d be swell if they had a train.Scene: Penny’s car.Sheldon: Thank you, Penny.Penny: No problem. So, Leonard, I think it’s interesting you didn’t call your girlfriend to come get you.Leonard: Uh, I kind of told her I was working.Penny: So you lied to her. Also interesting.Leonard: Ye ah, she doesn’t really understand the whole Warcraft adventure-role-playing thing. Penny: Well, doesn’t matter if she gets it, as long as she’s pretty.Howard: This one’s funny, Leonard. How come you couldn’t make it work with her? Penny: So did you at lea st get Sheldon’s fake stuff back?Sheldon: No. We failed in our noble quest.Penny: How come?Sheldon: Todd Zarnecki was mean.Penny: All right. Hang on.Leonard: What are you doing?Penny: I’m gonna show you how we finish a quest in Nebraska. Oh. Beyonce.(Ride of the Valkyries) This ain’t no Beyonce.Scene: Todd Zarnecki’s house. Todd answers the door.Todd: Now what?Penny: Give my friend his stuff back.Todd: I don’t know what you’re talking about.Penny: Well, then, good news. Today’s the day a girl’s finally going to touch you in your little special place. (Kicks him in the groin) Now give him his stuff back.Todd: Okay.Sheldon: We did it! I said, we.Scene: The lobby.Priya: Oh, hold the door.Penny: Oh, hi.Priya: Hi.Penny: Going to see Leonard?Priya: Yes. How have you been?Penny: Fine. You?Priya: Very well, thank you.(They ascend all three flights of stairs in silence.)Penny: Alright, well great seeing you.Priya: Yeah, you too.Penny: Amy’s right. I do want to fling my poop at her.。

It feels like it wasn't that long agowe were here doing this for Halley.'Cause it wasn't.Which reminds me, before we leave,let's get you a vasectomy.Oh, that's sweet, but today is all about you.So, you two ready to find out the sex of this baby? - Yeah. - Absolutely.Is Halley hoping for a little brother or a little sister? Well, she's nine months old,so unless it jingles or is in my bra, she doesn't care. And how about you two?You know, for the first one, we really wanted a girl, but this time around, we don't have a preference. Yeah. Boy, girl, as long as it's healthy.Well, it's a boy.Come on, you can't really be disappointed.Hey, I barely know how to be a man myself.Now I have to teach someone?As the saying goes, those who can't do, teach? Don't you want a little version of Howard?I already have a little version of Howard.Now I'm having a son?I'll have to teach him how to play sports,and-and watch sportsand-and-and-and-and-and...He just ran out of man things. He's in trouble.It's okay. We're all here to help.Yes. And this baby will have plenty of manly role models. Now, I'm certain that whatever Bernadette can't teach him, Penny can.Uh, she can pee into a bottle.Anything with a neck wider than a nickel.Howie, there's a lot of amazing things you can teach a son. Yeah. You do always know how to pick just the right antacid.I don't know if I can teach that.It's just something I was born with.Come on. You can build things.You were an astronaut.That's true.You know, as a kid, I used to make model rockets.That'd be pretty cool to do with a son.Model rockets. Finally, something interesting.What is your preferred mode of recovery?Sheldon, we're helping our friends.And we got to model rockets, yeah?It was a tedious road, but well worth the effort.- So, have you thought of any names? - Amy.We finally got to model rockets.Why are you turning back?Hey, where are you going?Back to the dry cleaner. Look at this.They didn't get the stain out of my Starfleet uniform.Well, if you didn't make me wear the green body paint in bed, you wouldn't have to get it dry-cleaned so much.Nah, it's worth it.Hey, wait, it's your mom.Oh, too bad. She just missed me!Hey, Beverly.Oh, hello, Penny.Uh, Leonard just left.He's gonna be so upset he mssed your call.Why?Because he...Yeah, I don't know.How are you?Did you mean personally or professionally?Um, personally?Like, what'd you do last night?I had Cuban food at the home of a manwith whom I shared unsatisfying intercourse.Wow. Okay.And to anticipate your next questions,roasted pork and sideways missionary.Sure. Sure. 'Cause you were full.I haven't looked at all this stuff in years.Had it.Had it.Burnt down my garage with it.I had three model rockets as a kid,and that was the largest space program in India.You have a replica Saturn V?Yeah. My dad bought it before he, you know,abandoned our family.Lucky duck.Could never bring myself to open it without him.It's silly.No, it's not silly.I always wanted my dad to build rockets with me,but he wasn't interested.Ah, yes, disappointing fathers.Tell me about it.I remember for my 16th birthday, my dad bought me a Mercedes. Like, a little one, like a starter Mercedes.He had barely handed me the keysbefore he had to rush back to work.I didn't see him again till, like,pretty late that night.Anyway......as angry as I was with him leaving,building this stuff is probably what led meto become an engineer.I suppose, in his own way,my dad also encouraged me to pursue science.I mean, he is the one that taught methat flatulence is combustible.And also, polyester gym shorts don't burn.They melt.Yeah, I guess I'm an astrophysicist because,as a kid, I said I like to look at the stars,so my dad sent me to Hawaii to visit the Keck telescope.是世界上口径第二大的光学/近红外线望远镜Screw you. My pain is real.You know what? Forget the past.What do you say you and me build this rocket?That sounds like it could be a real bonding experience for us. Right?Oh, I see.Oh, you think that's a positive.So, you don't want to hang out with Sheldon and Howard? No, they were bonding over their sad childhoods,and my stupid parents were always there for me.What's all this?I'm just boxing up all the clothes Halley's outgrown.Guess we won't need them anymore.Oh, well, slow down.I'm sure there's some you could reuse for a boy.Daddy's little girl?Okay, well, what if we, uh, change it to say,Daddy's little girl magnet?Boom! Boy shirt.What about this?Uh, okay.Uh, pull off the skirt, slap a lightning bolt on the front, and you got baby Flash.Stick a long sleeve under it.Boom! Baby Sheldon.Wow, you're really good at this.Oh, please.This isn't my first time turning girl clothes into boy clothes. Why? You got your sister's hand-me-downs?Yeah, that.Oh. I should've brought peanuts.You can't eat peanuts. You're allergic.If you die, who's going to drive me home?I'm not gonna eat them.It's a thing they do at JPL.负责开发与管理无人空间探测任务When the Ranger mission finally had a successful launch, 发射过9次只成功过5次there were peanuts in the room.Ever since then, they have them at every launch.That sounds like a silly superstition.It's more of a tradition.Oh! I do love a tradition.Could you pull over at the next peanut store?I don't think that's a real thing.Oh, don't be pedantic.Any nut store will do.I-I don't think we can get peanuts out here.Ah, well, then this whole day's ruined.Now that I think about it, maybe it is more of a superstition. Whew! That was close.Oh, uh, hey, Beverly, you called my phone, not Leonard's. Actually, I was hoping to speak with you.Is this a good time?Uh, that depends.What time is it where you are?Uh, just after 5:00.Yeah, that counts.Yeah, that counts.What's up?Well, I enjoyed our conversation the other day,and I was hoping to continue it.Really?Uh, yes. You may find this surprising,but I don't have a lot of what you would call girlfriends. What?Of course, there are my female colleagues,but, uh, they're all Freudians,so the only boy that I can dish about is my father.so the only boy that I can dish about is my father.Uh, well, you know, I'm here for you.What do you want to talk about?Well, last time, we focused on my life.If we're going to be real girlfriends,we should talk about you as well.Well, you know, if we're gonna be real girlfriends,we should get a third girl we can trash behind her back. Oh, so we'd be catty.Oh, I like it.What about Sheldon's fiance?She seems a bit dour.Ooh, dour? Meow.All right.Here we go.L-minus ten, nine...Wait, what are you doing? It's T-minus?I was an astronaut. We used L-minus.But this is a Saturn V,and when they launched those, they said T-minus?It's my rocket! We're doing it my way.Fine.I'm not saying I know why your dad left,but I think I'm getting an idea.L-minusten, nine, eight,seven, six...'Cause you're kind of bossy....five, four, three, two,one...I remember them going up higher.Well, that's perfect.I mean, the one thing I thought I could do with my son, I can't even do that right.Well, if you want to see it again, I got it on video. Looks pretty cool in slow motion.Thank you for your support.- You're welcome. - I was being sarcastic.How dare you!Sheldon, what am I gonna do?I mean, what do I know about raising a boy?What do you know about raising a girl?Oh, my God, you're right.Well, I don't know if that was sarcasm or not.So, either you're welcome, or hey!Leonard, did you really just text me from the couchto put extra mustard on your sandwich?I was worried you might not check your e-mail.I swear to God, I will throw this out.That one was not me.Oh, wait, it was just your mom.My mother's texting you?Yeah. We've been talking a lot lately.Why?She sick of talking to the magic mirror on the wall?No, I think she's lonely.She's been reaching out.Okay, just be careful.You think you're getting close to her,and the next thing you know, you're featured in a bookcalled He's Doing It On Purpose: Raising a Teenage Bed-Wetter. No, it's not like that.You know, she's been opening up about her life,and she's actually been really supportive about mine.- Really? - Yeah.I've been telling her about my job,and she said she was proud of me.Well, that's great.Never told me she was proud of me.Even when I stayed dry for a whole month.Do you not want me to be friends with your mom?Well, let's be clear.I-I married you to hurt her.You're kind of ruining it.Reason number 13 to feel good:as a launch, it was bad,but as an explosion, it was glorious.Reason 14,you still have all your fingers,and boys prefer a dad with fingers.Thanks for trying,but you're not gonna be able to cheer me up.Well, how about this, then?You quit your whining before I give yousomething to cry about, young man.What?Those are comforting words my father would often say. Did it help?I turned out great.You tell me.Let's get going.Are you gonna be this mopey all the way home?I don't know, maybe.There any chance you'd be cheered upby an amazing trigonometry riddle?Well, if you can't answer that,there's no way you're gonna get this riddle.Oh, hey, hey, what do you think?Just because it's a boy, I don't think you need toput a picture of genitals on his shirt.But that's a baseball bat with two little baseballs. Okay, and now I see it.So, you know, I understand whyHoward is nervous about having a son,but are you really upset about it?No, I'm fine.It's just, I grew up with a bunch of brothers,so I thought it'd be nice for Halley to have a sister.Is that wrong?Of course it's wrong.You don't know what this little boy's gonna be like. Maybe he'll be rough and tumble,or maybe he'll be sweet and sensitive,or maybe he'll be all those things, like me.You're rough and tumble?You bet I am, bitch.But I'm also sensitive and regret saying that.- Hey. - Hello.You got a sec?Sure. What's up?Penny's been talking to my motherlike they're best friends, and it's kind of freaking me out. Okay...I'm pretty sure they're not best friends.'Cause you can only have one best friend.And Penny has that, and it's me.Oh, really? Is she FaceTiming with you right now? Because she's FaceTiming with my mom, and believe me, that is not a face you want to spend time with.Hmm. Well, I have been pretty busy lately.Maybe I've been neglecting our friendship.Penny knows I have a complicated relationship with my mother; it's like she doesn't even care.And with everything going on at the laband planning the wedding,I just, I have so little free time.Penny doesn't know how manipulative my mother can be.Did you know there's such a thing asreverse, reverse, reverse psychology?Because... there is.I mean, she must feel so abandoned.She's used to me being there all the time,but now I have my own life,and she's just gonna have to accept it.And why is my mom proud of Penny and not me?I mean, the real question is: why is Penny so afraid of me growing as a person?I'm good at stuff, too!I deserve my own life!Okay, well, thanks.Good talk.You know, studies have shownthat people distracted by emotional issuesare poor drivers.What about people distracted by irritating passengers?That would be hard to test,because irritating is a subjective quality.Strongly disagree.Can I drive?No.You can't drive.You don't even have a license.Actually, I do.Really? Since when?Three years ago.I went on a bit of a license kick.I'm also a commercial fisherman.Then why don't you ever drive yourself?Honestly, I barely passed my test.And the one time I drove on my own,I made a U-turn, got dizzy, threw up and walked home. You really want to drive?It seems like the perfect time.The roads are straight, there's no one around,and you don't seem to care if you live or die.Live, Sheldon. I want to live.That makes things a little trickier,but I'll do my best.Hi, Pen...Oh, hello, Leonard.Hello, Mother. How are you?- Fine. And you? - I'm great.Well, it's been lovely catching up.Wait. Hang on. We need to talk.Oh, brother.I want to know, why aren't you proud of me?Well, isn't the real question,"Why aren't you proud of yourself?"No, that is a question-- and I ask it a lot--but let's stick with the one I asked you.But why do you think I'm not proud of you?Because you never say it.But two days into chatting with Penny,and you can't stop telling her how great she is.She is great.Honestly, of all of my children's spouses,she's the one that I'm most impressed by.Seriously?Yes.She's confident, she's thoughtful,and she never complained about you once.I know what kind of strength that takes.So, Penny's your favorite?I suppose she is.You married well, Leonard, and for that I am proud of you.I don't... I don't... I don't know what to say.I'm also proud of how hard you're trying not to cry. Thank you.Would you like to hang up now?Yeah, here it comes.Your hands are at 10:00 and 2:00.Good. Steady on the gas.Okay.Now you're gonna want to slowly switch lanes. Why?Because there are only two,and you're not in either of them.Attaboy. Well done!Thank you.The last time I drove, I was terrified,but this is fun.You're doing great.You're a good teacher.Your son is going to be lucky to have you as a father. Thanks.Do you think I could try going a little faster?Go for it, champ.Ow.Sorry.Just ease on the gas, and...Oh, too much! Too much!Why was I scared of this? This is exhilarating! No, it's not! Slow down!Don't tell me what to do! You're not my father!Do you know how fast you were going?112.Let me see your license.- Okay, here's the plan. -No.Fine.There you go.You know what, you can just keep it. You know what, you can just keep it.。

在"阿凡达"里面潘多拉星球的人做爱Okay,in A vatar,when they have sex on Pandora,就是把辫子结合在一起也就是说they hook up their ponytails,so we know their ponytails 他们的辫子就像生殖器一样are like their junk.对啊... 所以呢?Y eah... so?所以他们骑马或者骑鸟So,when they ride horses and fly on the birds,也是用他们的辫子they also use their ponytails.你到底想说什么?What's your point?我想说如果我是马或者鸟My point is,if I were a horse or a bird,在詹姆斯·卡梅隆身旁肯定紧张死了I'd be very nervous around James Cameron.你真是奇怪It amazes me how you constantly obsess总是沉迷于一些科幻细节over fictional details现实生活中when there are more important things有更重要的事值得考虑in the real world to worry about.比如为什么威廉·夏特纳For example,why wasn't William Shatner没有出演新的"星际迷航"呢?in the new Star Trek movie?嘿SheldonHey,Sheldon.我刚才在楼上行政办公室I was up in the administration office,碰巧听到了and I happened to overhear今年科学领域the name of the winner校长奖得主的名字of this year's Chancellor's A ward for Science.你是想拿我的贡献又被忽略这件事And you want to rub my nose in the fact来让我难堪?that my contributions are being overlooked again? 我就是理论物理界的威廉·夏特纳I am the William Shatner of theoretical physics.好吧洗耳恭听All right,I'll play.今年他们又把奖给了哪个What self-important,preening fraud自以为是洋洋自得的骗子?are they honoring this year?噢很高兴你这么问就是你Oh,I'm so glad you asked it like that. Y ou.- 我得奖了? - 你得奖了- I won? - Y ou won.我得奖了!I won!太令人鸡冻了This is astonishing.倒不是因为是我得了奖... 没人比我更该得这个奖Not that I won the award... no one deserves it more. 其实是我说错了Actually,I guess I misspoke.不是鸡冻是必然It's not astonishing,more like inevitable.我应该先干嘛呢I'm not sure what to do first.可能应该先打电话告诉我妈妈Maybe I should call my mother.等等! 我知道了... 我要先自我采访一下Wait! I know... I'm going to conduct an interview再传到网上去with myself and post it online.好事啊Well,good for him.是啊这个理论物理界的威廉·夏特纳Y eah,the one thing the William Shatner是需要再自负一点of theoretical physics needed was an ego boost.是不是感觉那长矛Didn't it look like that spear直接刺穿你的头骨?was going to go right through your skull?没觉得No.嘿你在7-11便利店不买思乐冰饮料Hey,you didn't want a Slurpee at 7-Eleven,就没有3D眼镜赠品you don't get glasses.噢肯定又有人打电话来祝贺我了Oh,that will be another congratulatory call for me. 嗯静音Uh,mute,please.等等等会... 火焰箭来了Wait,wait. Hang on... flaming arrow.你好?Hello?噢Morton校长近来可好先生?Oh,Chancellor Morton,how are you,sir?是啊我在等您的电话Y es,I was expecting your call.三年前Three years ago.我知道了I see.等等如果我不发言会怎么样?Wait. What happens if I choose not to give a speech? 嗯嗯Uh-huh.那如果我不想奖励被没收呢?And if I don't want to forfeit the award?你想的办法倒是简单Well,you've got that tied up in a neat little bow.好吧All right.谢谢了Thank you.出问题了Problem.怎么啦?What?他们希望我在颁奖晚会上发言They expect me to give a speech at the banquet.我可不会I can't give a speech.不是吧你搞错了Well,no,you're mistaken.你整天都在发言Y ou give speeches all the time.你不会的是闭嘴What you can't do is shut up.对啊看电影之前Y eah,before the movie,你就鳄梨沙拉酱为什么变黄演讲了20分钟you did 20 minutes on why guacamole turns brown. 它就是在你长篇大论的时候变黄的It turned brown while you were talking.和少数人说话我还挺自在的I am perfectly comfortable speaking to small groups. 但是人多了我就说不出来了I cannot speak to large crowds.你觉得怎么样算人多?What,to you,is a large crowd?人多到可以踩死我就算多了Any group big enough to trample me to death.一般来说就是36个大人或者70个小孩General rule of thumb is 36 adults or 70 children. Sheldon 祝贺你啊Sheldon,congratulations.我从餐厅里给你带了奶酪蛋糕Brought you a cheesecake from work.是庆祝你获奖了Y ou know,'cause of your award,不是因为餐馆工在上面打了喷嚏not because a busboy sneezed on it.- 我不领奖了- 为什么?- I'm not accepting the award. - Why not?没想到伟大的Sheldon Cooper也会怯场吧Turns out the great Sheldon Cooper has stage fright. 这可不是退缩的借口That's no reason to back out.我以前在高中也得到过一项荣誉Y ou know,I once got a pretty big honor当时我也很怕in high school,and I was terrified在众人面前亮相about appearing in front of a big crowd,但是我克服了结果呢but I went through with it,and you know what?作为漂亮女王团的一名成员The world looked pretty darn good坐在福特F-150车后头的干草堆上sitting on a haystack in the back of a Ford F-150我感觉世界美得不得了as a member of the Corn Queen's court.谢了Thank you.对了我要是被提名为乡下人和平奖Y eah,I'll bear that in mind我肯定记住你的话if I'm ever nominated for the Hillbilly Peace Prize. Sheldon 你太荒谬了Sheldon,you're being ridiculous.我有吗?Am I?给你们说个故事吧Let me tell you a story.上哪儿去找需要的70个小孩?Where's 70 children when you need them?我14岁的时候以Summa cum laude从大学毕业I was 14 and graduating summa cum laude from college. "Summa cum laude" 是拉丁语"最高荣誉"的意思"Summa cum laude" is Latin for "with highest honors."我特别喜欢你总是直接跳过I just love how you always skip没人发问的地方over the part where no one asks.我作为学生代表要致告别辞I was valedictorian and expected to give an address.直到现在我都还记得当时Even now,I can remember that moment我走上讲台注视人群when I walked up to the podium and looked out at the crowd. 肯定有好几千人There must have been thousands of people.我的心扑通扑通直跳My heart started pounding in my chest.结果我呼吸过猛I began to hyperventilate.视线开始模糊之后就...My vision became blurry,and before I knew it...噢天哪Oh,dear.噢上帝啊Oh,my God.Sheldon啊?Sheldon?Sheldon 你没事吧?Sheldon,are you okay?别踩着我了Don't trample me.得了吧母亲大人Come on,Mother.你明明知道我为啥不能接受那个奖Y ou know why I can't accept the award.恕我直言我没觉得祈祷能帮上啥忙With all due respect,I don't think praying will help.不我没听过"主啊请掌控这命运之轮"这首歌No,I have not heard the song,"Jesus,Take the Wheel." 停停停停停停No,no,no,no,no,no,no.你不用给我唱Y ou don't need to start singing it.是的我自己会去iTunes下载的母亲大人Y es,I'll buy it on the iTunes,Mother.再见母亲大人Good-bye,Mother.你们好Hello.快坐下Sit down.我们想和你谈谈We want to talk to you.我犯错了吗?Am I in trouble?我妈给你打电话了?Did my mother call you?快坐吧Just sit.我们觉得能帮你克服怯场We think we can help you with your stage fright.哦是吗Oh,I doubt that.我比你们都聪明I haven't figured out a way,但仍未想出解决方案and I'm much smarter than all of you.没错但一个诸葛亮却抵不过三个臭皮匠Y es,but you're not smarter than all of us put together. 哦抱歉Oh,I'm sorry.我就是那个意思That is what I meant.算了总之你的问题是Okay. Y our problem is,你想单靠自己来解决这个问题you're trying to do this all by yourself.我们可以帮你做你的后备We can help you. We can be your team.就像X教授和他的X战警Like,uh,Professor Xavier and his X-Men.我的确喜欢X战警I do like the X-Men.我看过X战警吗?Did I see X-Men?我们上周才看过啊Y eah,we watched it last week.你还说你很喜欢Y ou said you liked it.哦亲爱的我说过很多东西Oh. I say a lot of things,sweetie.那么Sheldon 你觉得如何?So,how about it,Sheldon?不知道I don't know.如果你们是我的X战警那你们有什么样的能力?If you're my X-Men,what are your powers?嗯我可以带你购物Okay. Well,I am going to take you shopping,买套体面的西服get you a nice suit.为你增添信心Might give you more confidence.这又不是什么突变让你能That's not exactly a mutation that would get you进入X教授为天赋异禀的少年而设的学校算了继续吧into Xavier's School for Gifted Y oungsters,but go on. Leonard呢?Leonard?我能试着分析你I thought I could try to analyze you找出怯场的根源and get to the root of your anxiety.你有资格了解我的脑内结构吗?What qualifies you to attempt to understand my mind?我老妈是个德高望重的精神科医生My mother is a highly regarded psychiatrist,自从她说我过于依赖母乳后and I've been in therapy ever since she accused me而且我就一直在接受治疗of breast-feeding codependently.Raj说他能教你...Raj says he can teach you...叫啥名字?What did you call it?没明白... 反正是一些印度冥想之类的邪门偏方I don't know... some Indian meditation crap.懂了I see.好吧鉴于其他人Well,I assume,since the rest of you的办法都不怎么高明我假设have set the bar so low,you're saving你把最出彩的留着压轴the most impressive contribution for last.说吧HowardGo ahead,Howard.给我点惊喜Dazzle me.我的能力就是假装My power is the ability to pretend不知道你有那个怪毛病like I give a damn about your piddily-ass problems.老兄这可是全天候服务啊And that's 24-seven,buddy.我很感谢你的伪装And I appreciate the pretense.那么Sheldon 你觉得如何?So,what do you say,Sheldon?我们足够成为你的X战警吗?Are we your X-Men?不行No.X战警是以Charles Xavier的姓氏首字母命名的The X-Men were named for the "X" in Charles Xavier.我叫Sheldon Cooper 自然得叫C战警(与"精液"谐音)啦Since I am Sheldon Cooper,you will be my C-Men.哦这名字真瞎Oh,that's not a good name.好了SheldonOkay,Sheldon.我将要引领你I'm going to be leading you进入一系列冥想练习through a series of meditation exercises.这套方法源自古代印度的宗教领袖These methods come from the ancient gurus of India 用来帮助克服自身的恐惧and have helped me overcome my own fears.可你到现在还不能跟女人讲话And yet,you can't speak to women.没错但多谢冥想我已经能True,but thanks to meditation,I am able to stay和女人们共处一室且不会紧张到要小便in the same room with them without urinating.现在... 请闭上你的眼睛Now... close your eyes.可以但别打我Okay,but don't punch me.啥?What?小时候我妹妹跟我说When I was little,my sister would say to me,"闭上眼睛我给你一个惊喜""Close your eyes,you'll get a surprise,"然后就打了我一拳and then she'd punch me.我不会打你的I'm not going to punch you.我妹以前也这么说That's what my sister used to say.你还想不想做了?Do you want to do this or not?抱歉继续I'm sorry. Proceed.很好All right.想象你身处在一个地方Imagine yourself in the one place能让你有家的感觉you feel most at home.在哪儿?Where is that?模拟城市(热销游戏)Sim City.更具体地说是我设计的模拟城市...More specifically,the Sim City I designed..."谢耳朵大都市"Sheldonopolis.好吧你在"谢耳朵大都市"Okay,you're in Sheldonopolis.能否再具体点?Where exactly?"谢耳朵广场"? 还是"谢耳朵塔"?Sheldon Square? Sheldon Towers?还是"谢耳朵勇士"的大本营"谢耳朵体育场" ? Sheldon Stadium,home of the Fighting Sheldons?你爱哪儿哪儿去Whatever you like.我还以为这是引导冥想呢I thought this was supposed to be a guided meditation.好吧你在"谢耳朵广场"Fine. Y ou're in Sheldon Square.真的吗? 这个时间点?Really? This time of year?可能会很冷啊It's a bit nippy.那你不会穿件毛衣Then,put on a sweater.那就假设我跑到商业区Suppose I could run downtown在"谢尔玛"(音似沃尔玛)买了些东西and pick up something at Shel-Mart.随便啦快去买件毛衣就行了Y eah,whatever. Just go buy a sweater.知道吗"谢尔玛"的好处就是是我开的Y ou know,the nice thing about Shel-Mart is I own it, 所以我能打85折so I get a 15% discount.行那个破店是你开的Y ou own the damn thing.赶快去买件毛衣吧!Just take a freaking sweater!拜托上一季度我获得的盈利Look,I didn't turn a profit last quarter可不是随便卖卖库存就能做到的by taking product off the shelves willy-nilly.好了All right.你已经买了毛衣这会儿在"谢耳朵广场"上Y ou've paid for a sweater,and you're in Sheldon Square. 等下Hang on.我买了件开襟羊毛衫得先把扣子扣好It's a cardigan. I have to button it.哦糟了Oh,no.又怎么了?What now?一只哥斯拉模样的怪兽走过来了A Godzilla-like monster is approaching the city.我要保护我的人民I have to get my people to safety."谢耳朵大都市"的市民们我是市长先生People of Sheldonopolis,this is your mayor.快跟我走Follow me.小孩们跑不动就算了扔下吧If the children can't run,leave them behind.哦原来是假想恐怖!Oh,the simulated horror!Raj 人呢?Raj?唉早就料到了Just as I suspected.冥想完全就是废话连篇Meditation is nothing but hokum.我很怀疑你的假设I question your premise.一件新西服怎么能起到防止How is a new suit going to prevent me我在舞厅所有人面前不晕倒呢?from passing out in front of a ballroom full of people? 它可以给你增加信心It'll give you confidence.每当有什么事情压得我透不过气时Y ou know,sometimes when I'm feeling all stressed out 我便出去逛街买件可爱的上衣about something,I go out and buy a cute top或是件好玩的裙子之后我就有了崭新的生活观or a fun skirt and I have a whole new outlook on life.难道你最后没发现Don't you eventually realize穿上可爱上衣穿上好玩裙子后you're just the same stressed out person还是饱受压力困扰吗?in a cute top or a fun skirt?买好鞋子后我会有这种感觉Y eah,that's when I buy shoes.来看看这都有些什么货Now,let's see what we've got.噢!Ooh!这件不错This is nice.可是单色的It's only one color.是的咋了?Y eah,so?才一种颜色的衣服哪里值这么多钱That's a lot of money for only one color.好吧Fine.你自己挑选你喜欢的好了Why don't you pick out what you like.嗯Hmm.这件穿上挺像犀利哥的This is pretty sharp.像你个大头鬼No. Y ou're wrong.这件太棒了This is great.六岁时我有件一模一样的I had a suit like this when I was six.好了这件一定可以了吧Okay,I think we have a winner.你从哪翻出来的这玩意?Where the hell'd you find that?就舞会专柜那In the prom department.太荒唐了It's ridiculous.亏你还是漂亮女王团的前成员(该团成员的着装偏好白色) Says the former member of the Corn Queen's Court.求你试试这件吧Please just try this one on.好吧Okay.反正我现在穿啥But anything I put on now你都会指责一大通is only going to suffer in comparison.这也太荒唐了This is absurd.简直就是个小丑I look like a clown.那么Sheldon...So,Sheldon...近来可好?how you doing?你的心理治疗谈话就这样开篇?That's how you start a psychotherapy session?"近来可好?""How am I doing?"你可是承诺说要在我的潜意识里I was promised a riverboat journey带我进入丛林中开始一段河船冒险之旅into the jungles of my subconscious.结果你跟我说的话与在Ralph意式餐厅Instead,I get the same question I hear为我切大红肠的女服务生的话是一样的from the lady who slices my bologna at Ralph's.抱歉我重来I'm sorry,I'll start again.先诉说我做的梦的话对你是不是有帮助?Would it be helpful to you if I told you about my dreams? 不清楚也许会吧Um,I don't know,maybe.我最近做了一个梦我是个巨人I recently had a dream that I was a giant.但周围的事物也变的无比巨大But everything around me was to scale,看上去没什么异常so it all looked normal.如果周围事物都变大的话How did you know you were a giant你是怎么发现自己成了巨人的?if everything was to scale?我穿的裤子是一百万码的I was wearing size a million pants.我们还是正常聊天吧?Why don't we just talk?好的Ah.纯粹的聊天The talking cure.经典弗洛伊德派真好Classical Freudian. Good choice.如果这样有助于快点解决问题的话If it will help speed things along,我的标准罗夏墨迹测验(弗洛伊德的经典投射法人格测验)答案是uh,my answers to the standard Rorschach inkblot test areA一只蝙蝠 B 一只蝙蝠A) a bat,B) a bat,C 一只蝙蝠C) a bat,D 我爸用皮下注射针头杀害了我妈and D) my father killing my mother with a hypodermic needle.还是我来说吧?Why don't I just start?有时候Sometimes人们拒绝赞扬people have trouble accepting accolades是因为潜意识里觉得自己配不上if,on a subconscious level,they don't feel they deserve them.你有没有觉得现在我们就是这种情况?Do you think maybe that's what's happening here?你说呢Leonard?Really,Leonard?你是又想用阿德勒的"自卑情节"学说Y ou're just going to try to recycle Adler's doctrine来忽悠我了?of the inferiority complex?那我还不如去找Ralph意式餐厅那位服务生呢I could probably get that from the woman at Ralph's.她还会让我免费试吃几块奶酪呢And she'd let me taste some pieces of cheese for free.但那或许就是你的结症所在But it could be part of your problem.我给你举个例子吧Let me give you an example.当我八岁的时候When I was eight,我做了一个叫"听古典音乐能加速菜豆的生长"的实验I won a ribbon at the science fair在科学展览得了奖章for my project,"Do Lima Beans Grow Better to Classical Music." 可我妈说那不过是But my mother pointed out我哥作品的老调重弹that it was just a rehash of my brother's earlier他的实验是"听摇滚音乐能减缓菜豆的生长""Do Lima Beans Grow Worse to Rock & Roll."我觉得很内疚便把奖章还了回去I felt so guilty,I gave the ribbon back.哦你是什么感觉呢?And how did that make you feel?糟透了Terrible.我做那个实验花了好大力气I worked really hard on that project.为了等菜豆发芽I stayed up all night singing the clown's aria from Pagliacci我唱了一夜歌剧"丑角"中的"小丑咏叹调"to a lima bean sprout.继续诉说Go on.又不是我的错It wasn't my fault.我从没看过我哥的项目I had never seen my brother's project.我妈本可以提前告诉我And my mother could have told me before而不是在颁奖仪式上当着所有人的面前instead of at the ceremony in front of everyone.哦我能听出来So,I hear you saying你很生你妈的气you're angry with your mother.太对了我是生我妈的气Damn right,I'm angry with my mother.看在上帝的份上那年我才8岁For God's sake,I was eight years old.她当众羞辱了我She humiliated me.就是从那时起我又开始尿床了That's when the bed-wetting started again.谢谢你LeonardThank you,Leonard.谢我什么?For what?如果像你这样受过如此打击的人If someone as damaged as you每天都能从床上爬起来面对生活can find his way to crawl out of bed each morning,那我也能应付一个简单的颁奖仪式I think I can face a simple award ceremony.等等这就完了?Wait,that's it?我想着我们要进行一整个小时呢!I thought we had a whole hour!女士们先生们晚上好Good evening,ladies and gentlemen.我是Leonard Hofstadter博士My name is Dr. Leonard Hofstadter,很荣幸能够在这里介绍本年度and it is my very great honor to introduce the winner总理科学奖的获奖者of this year's Chancellor's A ward for Science我最好的朋友Sheldon Cooper博士and my good friend,Dr. Sheldon Cooper.在介绍他之前But before I do,我想先和各位分享一封来自I'd like to share with you a letter from Sheldon's mother, 今晚不在场的Sheldon的母亲的信who couldn't be here tonight.很温馨吧?Isn't that nice?他母亲还专门写了封信His mother sent him a letter.她为他而自豪She's proud of him.我多希望自己也能有这种经历I wonder what that feels like.总之Anyway,"亲爱的Shelly""Dear Shelly."这是她对他的爱称That's what she calls him.Shelly... 这是小名Shelly... it's a pet name.你们知道我母亲给我取的小名是什么吗?Y ou know what my mother's pet name for me is? 就是LeonardLeonard.跑题了哈But I digress."亲爱的Shelly...""Dear Shelly..."哦天啊Oh,dear.怎么了?What's the matter?我有点儿晕了I'm getting dizzy.别紧张Don't worry.你的C战警就在你旁边Y ou're surrounded by your C-Men.我不行了I can't do this.我要晕倒了I'm going to faint.给喝点儿Here,drink this.会让你放松点儿It'll relax you.酒?Alcohol?我不喝酒I don't drink alcohol.那就算了晕吧Fine,faint.没什么变化I don't feel different.这酒是次品This alcohol is defective.来试试这个管用不Here,see if this one works.首先First of all,这两个实验完全不一样the projects were totally different.我是想表现出I was showing用古典音乐培育菜豆可以that classical music nurtures lima beans促进它们生长但是我妈妈and makes them grow,but my mother根本不听我的didn't hear me.如果你们想知道If you'd like to look at the relationship培育和生长的关系我要说明的是between nurturing and growth,I'd like to point out我哥哥足足比我高了八英寸!that my brother is eight inches taller than me.我准备好了I'm ready.喔Oh.好的Right.女士们先生们有请我们的贵宾Ladies and gentlemen,our guest of honorSheldon Cooper博士Dr. Sheldon Cooper.谢谢啦小矮个接下来就是我的时间啦Thanks,shorty,I'll take it from here.好的你们想要找点儿乐子吗?All right,you people ready to have some fun?你们懂不懂Y ou have a basic微分的基本概念?understanding of differential calculus有没有至少学过一年的代数拓扑?and at least one year of algebraic topology?好的我要开始讲笑话了Well,then here come the jokes.小鸡为什么要穿麦比乌斯圈(拓扑学中的单面环)? Why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip?为了去同一边... 对了!To get to the same side... bazinga!下一个一个中子走进一家酒吧问道All right,a neutron walks into a bar and asks,"一杯酒多钱?""How much for a drink?"酒保说"对你免费"(与"无电荷"谐音)The bartender says,"For you,no charge."在听吗?Hello?我知道你们就在那I know you're out there.我可以听到你们在呼进氧气I can hear you metabolizing oxygen呼出二氧化碳and expelling carbon dioxide.在座有很多学术界的权威人士Looks like we have some academic dignitaries in the audience. 地理系的Randall博士...Dr. Randall from the geology department...[跟take for granted谐音]唯一一位别人说他"花岗岩脑袋" 也很开心的少有之人only man who's happy when they take his work for granite.哈哈哈!Ba-da cha!我开地理学家的玩笑呢I kid the geologists,of course,只是因为我对这个领域很不屑but it's only 'cause I have no respect for the field.接下来我们严肃点Let's get serious for a moment.我们为什么会在这里?Why are we all here?因为我们都是科学家'Cause we're scientists.科学家研究什么呢?And what do scientists study?宇宙The universe.宇宙是由什么组成的呢?And what's the universe made of?很高兴你们问了这个问题I am so glad you asked.[The Element's Song 化学元素周期表歌]* 它含有锑啊** There's antimony ** 有砷啊铝啊硒啊** arsenic,aluminum,selenium ** 有氢啊氧啊氮啊铼啊** and hydrogen and oxygen and nitrogen and rhenium * * 还有镍啊钕啊镎啊锗啊** and nickel,neodymium,neptunium,germanium *大家一起来!Everybody!* 有铁啊有镅啊** and iron,americium ** 有钌啊铀啊铕啊锆啊** ruthenium,uranium,europium,zirconium,** 有镥啊有钒啊** lutetium,vanadium *亚裔唱!Just the Asians!* 还有镧啊锇啊** and lanthanum and osmium ** 有砹啊有镭啊... ** and astatine and radium... *Penny Leonard啊Penny,Leonard.你们能不能回答我Would you be able to answer some questions昨晚发生了什么?I'm having about the events of last night?好的Sure.第一个问题...Question one...我的裤子呢?where are my pants?你可以上Y ouTube看看Y ou might want to check Y ouTube.搜什么?What do I search?已经缓冲好了直接播放吧It's already loaded. Just hit play.好的现在我们开始探讨数学吧All right,people,let's get down to the math.是三维思想It is only three dimensional thinking限制了我们的想象that limits our imagination.我能从头上把裤子脱下吗?Can I take my pants off over my head?当然不行Of course not.上身挡着呢My body's in the way.[视频名：物理学家斯文扫地]但是如果可以进入更高维度But if we had access to higher dimensions,我们就可以通过四维we could move our pants around our bodies让裤子在身体周围移动through the fourth dimension我们就要告别脱裤子的时代了and our days of dropping trousers would be over. 哦天哪...Oh,Lord...丢脸丢到家了This couldn't be any more humiliating.继续放Give it a minute.接下来Now,for the astronomers在座的天文学家准备好in the audience,get ready to see来看看月球的另一面吧the dark side of the moon.[Uranus 谐音your anus菊花]还有天王星呢And here's Uranus.。

《⽣活⼤爆炸》观后感《⽣活⼤爆炸》观后感 在观看完⼀部作品以后，这次观看让你有什么领悟呢？需要回过头来写⼀写观后感了。

那么我们该怎么去写观后感呢？以下是⼩编为⼤家整理的《⽣活⼤爆炸》观后感，欢迎⼤家分享！ 《⽣活⼤爆炸》观后感篇1 今天看了⼏集⼤爆炸，发现在搞笑的同时也引⼈深思。

看到⼋季11集中Amy和shelodn互赠礼物的那个点，感动到哭，也只有特别性格的两个⼈才会如此合拍。

⼀直觉得shelodn⾻⼦⾥就是那种以⾃我为中⼼的⼈，⽽Amy虽时有怨⾔，但从不强迫他。

以为他是那种没⼼没肺的⼈，却可以说出他爱Amy的那些细节。

他也确实是懂Amy，才会送出这么⼀份属于Amy的完美礼物。

细⼼如Amy，做了shelodn外婆做给他吃的饼⼲，让他感觉到温暖。

让shelodn感受到圣诞节youre happy ，Im happy的快乐。

他们没有⽤争吵的办法解决彼此的不同观点，⽽是⽤实际⾏动去改变，接受彼此。

故事⾥⾯的其它两对也是，有着不同的性格，但他们相互包容、理解对⽅的不同。

他们相爱、享受⼆⼈世界，但都有⾃⼰的事业、朋友，相互信赖不盲⽬依耐，⼤概就是最好的爱情。

《⽣活⼤爆炸》观后感篇2 如果你感到不开⼼，那就看看《⽣活⼤爆炸》吧，这是我看完后最深的感触。

这是围绕四个天才与美⼥在⽇常⽣活中发⽣的事为主题的情景喜剧。

主⼈公Leonard 和Sheldon是⼀对好朋友也是舍友，他们的智商绝对⾼⼈⼀等，对科学知识倒背如流，然⽽⾯对⼈际交往和⽇常⽣活却⼀筹莫展，常常因此⽽闹出笑话。

他们有两个唯⼀的好朋友，⼀个⾃认为是花花公⼦的Howard能说六种语⾔，经常⽤这个优势去吸引漂亮⼥孩，可是伎俩不⾼，往往只能起到反作⽤。

另⼀个来⾃印度的 Rajesh患有严重的“与异性交往障碍症”，有异性在场的时候他就⽆法说话，只有在喝醉以后才能⾃如的交流。

于是这四个古怪的科学家就这么和隔壁漂亮⼥孩panny悄然上演着让⼈忍俊不禁的故事···· 这五个⼈中，我最喜欢Sheldon，Sheldon是个智⼒超群EQ如⼩孩的可爱⽽固执的男孩，他讲话向来⼀针见⾎，安慰⼈除了那句可笑⼜让⼈觉得温暖的“there there”之外毫⽆建树，对室友Leonard的尖酸刻薄，凌晨敲门谈⼼，出于⾃⼰的热⼼⾮得成为⼀个不受欢迎的超级电灯泡等种种“恶”⾏，都那般值得原谅。

生活大爆炸百度百科
《生活大爆炸》百度百科。

《生活大爆炸》是一部美国情景喜剧，由查克·洛尔和比尔·普拉迪共同创作。

该剧以四个科学家和一个漂亮女孩的生活为主线，通过幽默搞笑的方式展现了他们之间的友情、爱情和生活琐事。

该剧自2007年首播以来，便受到了广大观众的喜爱，成为了一部备受追捧的经典美剧。

《生活大爆炸》的故事背景设定在加州帕萨迪纳，主要讲述了四位年轻的科学
家谢尔顿、莱纳德、霍华德和拉杰，以及他们的邻居和朋友佩妮之间的生活点滴。

谢尔顿是一个天才却古怪的物理学家，莱纳德是他的室友兼好友，霍华德是一位工程师，拉杰则是一位天才天文学家。

佩妮则是一个漂亮的女孩，她和四位科学家之间发生了一系列有趣的故事。

这部剧不仅在情节上富有创意，而且在角色塑造上也非常成功。

谢尔顿的古怪
性格和对日常生活的苛求，莱纳德的善良和幽默，霍华德的幽默和调皮，拉杰的害羞和善良，以及佩妮的率真和可爱，每个角色都深入人心，让观众们爱不释手。

除了角色之外，该剧还以科学知识为背景，穿插了很多有趣的科学知识和幽默
搞笑的情节，让观众在欢笑中学到了很多有趣的知识。

此外，《生活大爆炸》还成功地展现了现代年轻人的生活状态和情感世界，让
观众在笑声中感受到了生活的温暖和真实。

总的来说，《生活大爆炸》是一部充满笑声和温情的经典美剧，它不仅让观众
开怀大笑，还让人们在笑声中感受到了友情、爱情和生活的真谛。

这部剧已经成为了一部经典之作，深受广大观众的喜爱。

目录第6集 (2)第7集 (14)第6集Leonard... E06 莱纳德...I've got terrible news. 我有个坏消息What's going on? 怎么了?Before I tell you, 在告诉你之前perhaps I should soften the blow. 或许我应该先做点铺垫以减轻打击Y ou're face is pleasingly symmetrical. 你的脸真是匀称得令人愉悦呀Just tell me. 直说吧A Swedish team of physicists 一个瑞典物理小组is trying to scoop our super-fluid vortex experiment. 打算抢在我们之前进行超流体涡流实验{\an8}超流现象即液氦降到超低温时出现的特殊物理现象Oh, well, that kind of stinks. 噢好吧那真是有点讨厌啊That kind of stinks? 有点讨厌?Why aren't you more upset? 你怎么没有更生气?Did I soften the blow too much? 是我铺垫做太多了吗?Because this here is more like a Picasso painting.你脸这部分其实更像是毕加索的画作{\an8}毕加索笔下的人物五官通常都是扭曲且不对称的What are we going to do? 那我们要怎么办呢?Perform the experiment immediately. 现在立马进行实验I'd love to, but we need liquid helium 我倒是想但我们需要液氦and our shipment's on back order for a month. 而我们订的货要一个月后才到A month? What? Are you kidding me? 一个月? 你在逗我吗?That would have been a good time for you to soften theblow.刚才你就该先来点铺垫的That shirt brings out the blue in your eyes. 这件衬衫简直突显了你眼睛的蓝邃Thank you. Aren't you sweet. 谢谢你太可爱了Let's go check to see if the university 我们去看看大学has any helium in reserve. 还有没有备用的液氦吧Did you know that I almost didn't wear this shirt today? 你知道吗? 我今天差点就没穿这件T恤Hey, Barry, we're in trouble. 嗨巴瑞我们遇到点麻烦We need liquid helium. Does the department have any we can use? 我们需要液氦系里有我们能用的液氦吗?Sorry, there's a shortage. 抱歉液氦短缺中And what we do have I need for my quantum excitation study. 现有的这些我需要用在我的量子激发研究上{\an8}另一个液氦超流体的研究方向But you won't need much for that. 但你不需要用很多True, but if it's successful, 没错但如果它成功了I'm having a party with balloons. 我打算开个派对要用到气球{\an8}氦气密度很小常用于给飞艇热气球充气Come on, Barry, there's a Swedish team 拜托巴瑞有个瑞典团队trying to run our experiment before us. 想要抢在我们前面进行实验Can't you spare any? 你就不能匀一点出来吗?Be honest... if the shoe was on the other foot, 实话说... 易地而处would you do this for me? 你们会借给我吗?- Y es. - No chance. - 会的- 没门What are you doing? 你这是干什么?He said be honest, so I was honest. 他说了要照实说我就照实说了Didn't your mother tell you? It's the best policy. 你妈妈没这么教你吗? 坦白从宽So, what do you say? 那么你的意思呢?Hell no. 门儿都没有He could've softened the blow. 他本来该来点铺垫的生活大爆炸第九季第06集Why do you need Kripke? 你们为什么要找克里普克?{\an8}第三季第九集中出现Why don't you just go to Party City for helium? 干嘛不直接去派对城市买氦气?{\an8}派对城市派对用品店We'd have to go to every Party City in California.那我们就需要跑遍加州的每一家派对城市Sounds like you on Cinco de Mayo. 听起来好像你们过五月五日节似的{\an8}墨西哥的传统节日Hey, people were still talking about that party 喂大家现在都还在讨论着on siete de Mayo. 五月七日那场派对呢{\an8}五月七日是纳粹无条件投降日Leonard, if that Swedish team beats us, 莱纳德如果那个瑞典团队打败了我们I will never be able to enjoy 我就再也无法享受anything from their country again. 任何来自那个国家的东西了Which is a shame, because Swedish meatballs那很可惜的因为我最喜欢用牙签戳着吃are my favorite toothpick-delivered meatball. 它们的瑞典肉丸了If you need liquid helium so bad, I know a guy 如果你们特别需要液氦我认识一个人who can get you some, 能给你们弄点if you don't ask too many questions. 如果你们能不要问他太多问题的话- Who is he? - Where does he work? - 他是谁? - 他在哪儿工作?How does he get the helium? 他怎么弄到的液氦?How many questions are too many questions? 问几个问题算问太多问题?Maybe he's not for you. 也许他不适合你们Four questions. There answer's four. 四个问题答案是四个Hey, you know who went out 嗨你知道那天谁出去on a date the other night? Stuart. 约会了吗? 斯图尔特Oh, good for him. 噢挺好的I thought so, too. 我也是这么想的So is she, like, homeless, or framing him for a crime? 那么她是无家可归呢还是打算嫁祸于他?He's using some kind of dating app on his phone. 他最近在用一个手机约会软件Oh, which one? 噢什么软件?Maybe we can get Amy to try it. 或许我们该让艾米试试看I don't know. 我不知道Stuart, can you come in here? 斯图尔特你能出来一下吗?He tried to explain it to me. 他给我解释过It shows you pictures of people nearby, 你可以看到附近的人的照片you swipe them around, it looks kind of like a game. 我看他把照片刷来刷去就好像某种游戏一样Oh, and if you lose the game, you have to go out with Stuart. 噢如果你输了就不得不跟斯图尔特约会了What's up? 怎么了?Can you show us that dating app? 你能给我们演示一下那个约会软件吗?Oh, yeah, sure. 好的当然This thing has changed my life.这个东西简直改变了我的人生Wow. So how many girls have you met? 哇哦那你现在约过多少个女孩了? Two. 两个I probably don't need to mention 或许不用我提醒你们there's an entire number between that and zero. 零和二之间是量的飞跃呢Well, so how does it work? 好吧那怎么用?Uh, well, it-it shows me all 嗯它... 它为我显示the single women in a five-mile radius 半径五英里范围内的who are using the app. 使用这个软件的单身女性If I like the way they look, I hit thumbs up. 如果我喜欢她们的样子就点"赞"If I don't, thumbs down. 如果不喜欢就点"烂"Oh, what would make you give a girl a thumbs down? 那么你会为了什么给一个女孩点"烂"呢?First time it happens I will let you know. 如果有这种情况我会告诉你的Oh, hey. I just heard back from the liquid helium guy. 嗨我收到那个弄液氦的人的回复了What's he say? 他怎么说?He's got what we need and can meet us tonight. 他弄来了我们需要的约我们今晚见面Oh, really? 真的吗?Y ou know I don't like buying things at night. 你知道我不喜欢晚上出门买东西的January 7, 2009. 2009年一月七日晚上十一点半I went to the Ralph's at 11:30pm to pick up 我去拉尔夫商店买早上要吃的桂格燕麦麸Cracklin' Oat Bran for the morning and what did I see? 你猜我看到了什么?The man restocking the cereal shelves. 有人在为燕麦货架补货That's right. And what did he do? 没错然后他做了什么?He handed you the box directly and called you Stretch. 他直接拿给你一盒燕麦还叫你细高个It's like it was yesterday. 简直犹在昨天Do you want liquid helium or not? 你到底想不想要液氦?Of course I do. 当然想要I don't want that Swedish team scooping us. 我不想让瑞典团队抢发了我们的实验Then I'm going to tell him we're in. 那我就告诉他这笔生意成交了Leonard, wait. This is highly unethical.莱纳德等等这是严重违反实验规定的We're just bending the rules a little.我们只是稍微变通了某些规定We have grant money to do the experiment, 我们有做实验的经费so we're going to spend it on the helium we need. 所以就把钱用在我们需要的氦气上It's not like when Dr. Goldfarb 这又不是戈德法布博士claimed he bought an electron microscope 声称买了个电子显微镜and he was really just keeping 实际上却是在范奈斯的公寓里a Russian girl in an apartment in V an Nuys. 养了个俄罗斯女孩Was she helping him with his research? 那女孩对他的研究有帮助吗? Sure. 当然So, are we doing this? 那就这么定了?Okay, but where does he get the helium? 好但他从哪儿弄来的氦气呢? Remember? Don't ask too many questions? 记得吗? 别问个不停Uh, but this is violating university code. 但这违背了大学的规章制度A little, but... 一点点但是...if I may quote Einstein,引用爱因斯坦的话说The pursuit of science calls us 对科学的追求使我们to ignore the rules set by man? 可以无视人为的规则All right, do it. 好吧就这么定吧Tell him we're in. 告诉他我们同意了Done. 好了I can't find that quote on the Internet. 我在网上找不到那条名言Did you make that up? 是你编的吗?Before I answer, 在我回答之前may I just say your skin has never looked better. 我不得不说你的皮肤真是前所未有的光滑Aren't you just made of sugar. 你嘴真甜I'm not sure how I feel about this. 我不知道这样对不对Oh, come on, just let him put the app on your phone. 拜托让他把那个应用下到你手机上吧Y eah, Stuart got two dates with it. 对啊斯图尔特用它争取到两次约会呢One of which would've ended in sex had she not said no. 其中一次要是她不拒绝的话我们就上床了Okay, all set. 好吧弄完了Okay, let me see. 来让我看看Nope, nope, 不行不行nope... 不行Oh, he's cute! 噢他真可爱!Doesn't a teardrop tattoo 泪珠状的纹身难道不是mean he murdered someone? 代表他杀过人吗?And he's sad about it. 他为此感到愧疚Hey. Hello. 嗨大家好啊- Hey. - Hey, I thought you were gonna be out late? - 嗨- 我以为你们会晚回来呢If you wanted me to stay out later, 要是你想让我在外面待得晚点you should've given me more spending money. 就该多给我些零用钱What are you guys up to? 你们干什么呢?We put Amy on a dating app, 我们让艾米玩一个约会应用程序and we're seeing what's out there. 看看有什么合适的对象Oh, fun! Let me see. 有意思! 让我看看Uh, no... 不行...no, uh, definitely not. 不肯定不行What was wrong with that guy? 这人哪儿不好了?Uh, he's Indian. 他是印度人We've already got one of those. 我们已经有一个印度人了Ooh, we should find a nice Latino. 我们应该找个拉丁美洲人It really round us out. 那样就凑齐了Hey, I want to try. 我也想试试Uh, excuse me, c-can I have my phone back? 打扰一下我能不能拿回我的电话? Hang on, I'm trying to find you 等等我正试着给你找the next great love of your life. 人生下一个真爱呢The man who will father your children.找你孩子们的父亲呢Okay, yes or no on white guy with dreadlocks? 看梳细发辫的白人行不行?That must be him. 那个肯定就是他Oh, of course. 噢当然了An nondescript, white panel van. 一辆毫无特色的白色厢式货车Y ou may be familiar with it from the sentence: 你可能从这句话里听说过Their bodies were found in a nondescript, 在一辆毫无特色的白色厢式货车里white panel van? 他们的尸体被发现了Hey. 嗨What's up? 你们好吗?Uh, I'm Leonard. 我是莱纳德- This is my friend - I'm Skippy. - 这是我的朋友- 我叫史杰比{\an8}Skippy 也指日本女人尤其指妓女Skippy Cavanaugh. 史杰比·卡瓦诺Great. 很好Y ou got the cash? 带现金来了吗?Uh, yeah, uh, right here. 有在这Wait, hold on, hold on. 等等等等How do we know that you're not gonna 我们怎么知道你不会take the money and drive away? 拿了钱开车就走呢?What ya doing, Skippy? 你干嘛呢史杰比?Exactly what 1970s television crime dramas have taughtus.正是七十年代犯罪电视剧教我们的Y ou give us the helium first. 你先给我们氦气Oh, how do I know you're not gonna 那我怎么知道你们会不会drive away without paying me? 不付钱就开车走人呢?Guess I'm not the only one 看来我不是唯一一个who watches '70s television crime dramas. 看过七十年代犯罪电视剧的人Look, you can trust us. 你可以信任我们We're respected scientists. 我们是广受尊敬的科学家Well, he is. 只有他是I'm a wedding planner,我是个婚礼策划人who can't find love himself. 自己却一直单身It's ironic, but the point is 这很讽刺但重点是we can't trust you. 我们没法信任你Y ou're a sketchy character in a parking garage. 你就是个停车场里的路人甲Y eah, well, from my perspective, 好吧站在我的角度that's how you two appear to me. 我看你们俩也是一样的Well, I never thought of it like that. 我还从没想过这点Boy, frame of reference will just sneak up on you, won't it? 天啊参照理论就这么打你个措手不及了吗?My friend does make a decent point about the money. 关于钱的事我朋友说的有道理I don't feel comfortable just handing it over up front. 我感觉就这么把钱给你不是很放心Ah-ah-ah, no money, no helium.不给钱就拿不到氦气Seems we're at a, uh, stalemate.看来我们僵持住了Not technically. 严格上来说不是啊In chess, a stalemate refers to a situation 在国际象棋里"僵持"是指in which there are no remaining moves. 无路可走的情况Uh, you have plenty of moves available. 你还有好多路可走呢Y ou could beat us up and steal the money. 你可以暴打我们一顿把钱偷走Y ou could kill us, you know. 你还可以杀了我们的知道吧Really, you're only limited by your imagination. 真的你只是被自己的想象力限制住了Huh. 这样All these years, I've been using stalemate, 这么多年来我一直都把"僵持" when I really mean impasse. 当成"僵局"来用的I feel foolish. 感觉好蠢啊I don't think it matters if this is a stalemate 我觉得不管是说"僵持""僵局"or an impasse or a Mexican standoff. 还是"墨西哥僵局" 都不重要What are we gonna do here? 我们要在这儿干嘛?Oh, whoa, whoa, how can it be a Mexican standoff? 哦哇哦哇哦这怎么是墨西哥僵局呢?{\an8}表示对峙的三方或多方互相牵制的平衡状态.Everybody knows you need three sides for that. 大家都知道得要有三边对峙Not necessarily. 不一定的Uh, many argue the essence of a Mexican standoff 呃很多人说墨西哥僵局的本质就是is that no one can walk away from the conflict 就是没有人能毫发无伤的without incurring harm. 远离冲突Hmm, I don't follow. 嗯我不懂你的意思Let me give you an example.我给你举个栗子吧Earlier today, 来这儿之前I decoded the headers on your e-mail, 我破解了你邮箱的源文件and I know that your name is Kenneth Fitzgerald. 然后我知道了你的名字是肯尼斯·菲茨杰拉德From that, I figured out where you live and where you work. 从而我搞清楚你的住址及上班的地方Now, to make this a Mexican standoff, 现在为了实现墨西哥僵局I would say something like, uh, 我会说诸如此类的话呃Y ou give us the helium or I'll turn you in to the authorities? 你给我们氦气否则我就向当局告发你Is that a threat? 那是威胁的意思吗?Y eah, exactly. See, you're getting it. 嗯没错看你明白我的意思了Y eah, well, I know where you work, all right? 好吧我知道你的工作地点好吧? And if you mess with me, I'll report you, 如果你敢耍我我就举报你then I'll pound your asses into the ground. 然后我就把你摔个屁股墩儿Perfect! Now we really are in a Mexican standoff. 完美现在我们真的实现墨西哥僵局了Is this one of those times 我又再一次的where I've won the battle but lost the war? 赢了嘴仗输了斗争吗?Afraid so, Skippy. 恐怕是的史杰比I told you we shouldn't go shopping at night. 我告诉过你我们不应该晚上去购物All right, let's all just calm down. 好了我们都冷静一点Nobody wants to report anybody. 没人想要举报任何人No, I don't like this. I'm out. 不我不喜欢这样我要走了No, no, no. Wait, don't go. 不不不等等别走Just let me explain. 让我解释一下We're physicists, and we're trying to prove 我们是物理学家而我们试图证明a hypothesis that we've been working on for over a year. 我们努力了一整年的一个假设Really? What's the hypothesis? 真的吗? 什么假设?Space-time can be interpreted as 时空可以被看作是the surface of an n-dimensional superfluid. N维堆超流体的表层Hmm. Could be, could be. 嗯有可能有可能Go on. 继续Okay, but now there's this Swedish team that read our paper 好吧但现在有个瑞士团队读了我们的论文and they're trying to beat us to our own discovery. 而他们想要用我们的理论来打败我们We really need this helium. 我们真的很需要氦气And I'm sorry I lied about 我很抱歉谎称我是being a wedding planner who can't find love. 找不到真爱的婚礼策划人Although I am currently single, if you know anybody. 尽管我最近单身了如果你认识那个谁的话Here's the money. Can we do this? 给你钱我们继续交易好吗? Okay. 好的It's a shame about those scientists ripping you off. 那些剽窃你们的科学家应该感到羞愧I expected a higher ethical standard 我本来以为我们的瑞典朋友from our friends in Sweden. 会有节操一点儿呢It's actually pretty common in our field. 事实上在我们的领域是很司空见惯的Not much you can do about it. 你也不能把他们怎么样Well, for the right amount of money, 嗯为了你们给的这些钱if you know where they live, 如果你知道他们住哪儿there's, uh, plenty we could do about it. 我们呃可以大有所为的Did you hear that, Leonard? 你听到了吗莱纳德?There's plenty we could do about it. 我们可以大有所为Do you have a card? 你们有卡吗?Okay, here we go. 好了搞定了Now everyone can see. 现在大家都可以看了All right. (clears throat) 好了(清喉咙)Where do we stand on cross-eyed Mike? 我们为什么会觉得斗鸡眼麦克不错? Y ou know he won't be looking at other girls. 那样他看不到别的女孩了Unless they're sitting on the end of his nose. 除非她们坐在他的鼻子底下Okay, okay, okay. Thumbs down. 好的好的好的往下按Next. 下一个Ew, check out his tiny teeth. 呃快看他的小尖牙He looks like a man-dolphin. 他看起来像个海豚人儿Wait, if he's good in bed, 等等如果他床上功夫好she can throw him a fish. 她还可以扔条鱼奖励他(high-pitched): I love you, Amy. (高音): 我爱你艾米(squeaking) (海豚叫)Okay, I'm starting to feel guilty.好吧我开始有罪恶感了Aren't we being a little mean? 我们是不是有点太刻薄了?That's a fair point. 你的想法是对的We wouldn't make fun of someone like this to their face. 我们不应该取笑别人的长相Look, it's Stuart! 看是斯图尔特!Y ou may want to leave the room. 你可能会不想呆在这儿Right this way, Uncle Harvey.这边走哈维舅舅Will you stop with that already? 你能不能消停会儿?I'm trying not to attract attention. 我正试图消除别人的注意And tipping his hat to the cleaning lady didn't do that? 向清洁工脱帽行礼还不够引人注目吗?She said,buenas noches. What was he supposed to do? 她说"晚上好晚安"他能怎么办? Let's just start the experiment. 我们开始做实验吧Leonard, we should probably have our story straight 莱纳德我们也许应该把我们的故事理顺in case we get caught. 以免我们被抓We're not getting caught. 我们不会被抓到的Well, you can't be sure of that. 嗯你也不能保证What if the helium dealer rats us out? 假如卖家出卖我们怎么办?What if Kripke asks where we got it? 假如克里普克问我们是怎么弄到的怎么办?What if the university checks my family tree 假如学校调查我的家族成员and finds out I don't have an Uncle Harvey? 发现我根本没有舅舅叫哈维呢?The dealer doesn't care, Kripke has no authority over us, 卖家根本不在意克里普克不能越级上报and you being related to a metal container 而你和一个金属容器是亲戚would explain a lot. 这很合情合理Help me hook this up. 帮我把这个扣住Uh-oh. What? 啊哦什么?- Well, did you see this sticker? - What is it? - 嗯看到这个贴纸了吗? - 是什么? It's partially torn off, but the segment that remains reads: 一部分被撕掉了剩下的部分写着property of and the letter U ? 上面写着"所属机构为字母U"It's probably USC 可能是南加利福尼亚大学or UCLA. 或是加利福尼亚大学洛杉矶分校Y eah, but what if it's roperty of U.S. Government? 嗯但是如果它是联邦政府登记在册的呢?There's a national helium reserve in Amarillo, Texas. 在德克萨斯州的阿马里洛有国家贮存的氦气If this was stolen from there, 如果这是从那儿偷的we're accessories to a federal crime. 我们就犯国家罪了Let's not jump to conclusions. 我们别太快下结论- A lot of things start with U. - That's true. - 很多机构都是字母U开头的- 那倒是There's the U.S. Air Force, 美国空军U.S. Department of Defense, U.S. Navy, 美国国防部美国海军Y ou and I are going to jail.你和我会坐牢Listen, we can do the experiment as planned 听着我们可以按计划进行试验and beat the Swedish team to the punch, 然后打败瑞士团队or we can kiss our dreams good-bye because we were 或者我们可以和梦想挥手告别因为我们to afraid to break a few rules. 太害怕而不敢打破常规Ma'am. 您好Okay, does everyone remember the rules? 好大家都知道游戏规则了吧?If he's shirtless, one sip. 如果照片是半裸的喝一口Posing with a pet, two sips. 如果是跟宠物的合照喝两口Pet and shirtless, chug like it's your job. 如果是跟宠物拍的半裸照就一口气干了And pull! 现在开始!I have that same underwear! 我有同款的内裤哎!Chug! 干了!Mm, Amy, you're getting a text. 艾米你有短信Oh, um, give me that. 哦把手机给我I had a great time last night 我昨晚过的很开心No, no, st-stop reading that. 拜托别读了- Who's Dave? - I... - 谁是戴夫? - 我...Y ou went on a date last night? 你昨晚出去约会了吗?Are you seeing someone? 你在跟别人交往吗?No, it-it's not like that. 不不是这样的And I'd love to take you out again 真希望能再跟你出去坐坐Amy! What? 艾米! 不会吧?Can't believe it. Oh, my God. 真是不敢相信天哪Okay, it's like that. 好吧就是这样Thank you for coming back. 谢谢你能再回来Y eah, well, normally I wouldn't, 一般我不会这么做but my daughter's having a sleepover, and there's only 不过我女儿去朋友家过夜了so much screaming and Katy Perry a man can take. 我一个大男人也顶多只能看着水果姐尖叫了{\an8}Katy Perry 人称水果姐美国当红歌手Anyway, if you could just give us our money back, 好吧如果你把钱退给我们you can have your helium and we'll be on our way. 我们就把氦还给你然后各不相欠了Y eah, well, is there something wrong with it? 怎么那氦有什么问题吗?No, nothing. We just changed our mind. 没有是我们改主意了He has glasses and I'm a know-it-all; 从他戴着眼镜我又这么无所不知来看we are not built for prison. 我们绝对不是进监狱的人物Y eah, I hear you. 嗯好吧Well, you're good guys, so I'll, uh... 既然你们都是好人那我...I'll take the helium off your hands. 那我只能把它拿走了Thank you. 太感谢了But you ain't getting your money back. 不过钱我是不会给你们了Y ou're taking advantage of us? 你这是要占我们便宜吗?We clarified nomenclature together. 我们不是以命名法把这个问题说清楚了吗Look, I enjoy semantic digressions 我相信你们下一个合作伙伴肯定跟我一样as much as the next guy, but, uh, this is business. 享受跟你讨论语义学不过没这就是生意之道Y ou know what? 好了好了It's fine. Keep the money. 行吧我们不要钱了We just want to be done with this. 现在我们只想把这件事了结掉No problem, but I am gonna have to charge you 没问题不过我还得收一点点a small helium restocking fee. 补货的钱I don't understand. 我不太懂你的意思He wants more money. 他想再要点钱Well, it better not be more than a thousand dollars; 好吧不过千万别超过一千块that's all I've got on me. 我身上可只有这么多That's exactly how much it is. 我就要这么多Finally, 这下好了something breaks our way. 咱还是得破财免灾I can't believe you're seeing someone 我真不敢相信你跟别人交往and we don't even know about it. 竟然都不告诉我们Y eah, why wouldn't you tell us? 对啊你为什么不告诉我们呢? Because it's new and weird 因为这只是刚开始and I'm just trying to figure it all out. 我想自己先理清楚And I knew 而且如果我告诉你们if I told you guys I had been out 我跟几个人出去约会了with a few people that you'd get way too excited about it. 你们肯定会特别激动A few people? 几个人?- What?! Amy! - Amy! - 啥?! 艾米! - 艾米!So, are we allowed to ask how it's going? 所以我们能问问进展怎么样吗?It's going fine. 还不错It's mostly just been meeting people for coffee. 只是出去喝杯咖啡而已Wha...?! 啥...?!I thought we were all... 我以为我们都会这样...Never mind. 算了I-I thought you weren't ready 我还以为to start seeing people. 你还没有准备好跟其他人交往Well, I don't have much experience dating, 我没什么约会的经验so I decided it would be good for me 所以我觉得出去约几次会to, you know, get out there a little. 对我也是件好事Well, good for you. 对当然是件好事Thank you. 谢谢And how many guys have you gone out with? 你在跟几个人约会?Please be less than two. 老天保佑两个以下- Three. - Damn it. - 三个- 我去Well, the Swedes might beat us, 虽然瑞典人可能赢了我们but at least we won't get gang-noogied in prison. 不过至少我们没被扔进监狱{\an8}这句话是电影《监狱宝贝蛋》的台词Is Ernest Goes to Jail the only prison movie you've seen? 监狱电影你是不是只看过《监狱宝贝蛋》?It scared me straight, Leonard. 你是不知道它有多吓人莱纳德Hey, I've been thinking. 嗨我回去想了想I was being petty. 之前是我太小气了Y ou can have my helium. 我那儿的氦可以给你们Thank you, Barry. 谢谢你巴瑞But you have to add my name to your paper. 不过你们报告里得把我的名字加进去That's preposterous. 这太荒谬了I don't know, seems fair. 这很公平啊Y ou can't do it without me. 反正没有我你们也成不了事Can you give us a minute? 能给我们点时间讨论一下吗?Take your time. 没事慢慢讨论I'll walk out backwards for dramatic effect. 为了营造戏剧效果我要倒着走出去I don't like being extorted like this. 这有点像被敲诈的感觉我不想这样Especially by him of all people. 尤其是被他敲诈Me neither, but what other choice do we have? 我也不想啊但是我们能怎么办?I promise this is the last time. 我保证这是最后一次It says right here on Wikipedia. 维基百科上是这么说的"A Mexican standoff is a confrontation between "墨西哥僵局是指at least three parties." 至少三方双间的对峙"How can you trust Wikipedia 维基百科竟然用"在两者之间"来指三方事物if they use "between" to refer to three parties? 你怎么可以相信啊?They should've used "among," right? 应该用"什么之中"这个词对吧?Or "amongst," if they were feeling whimsically archaic. 想听起来复古一些也可以用"当中"这个词All right, enough with the chitchat. 好了先别闲聊了Are we gonna watch Ernest Goes to Jail or not? 我们到底还要不要看《监狱宝贝蛋》啊?Absolutely. 当然看了But don't be surprised if this movie sets you 不过看完这部电影你可能就再也不敢违法了- on the straight and narrow. - I am open to change. - 我先提醒你一下- 我很乐于改变的第7集Did you hear about this study that found people E07 你们有没有听说一项研究that were cool and popular at 13 十三岁时比较酷比较受欢迎的人have problems succeeding later in life? 长大后却很难成功Hmm. I'm doing okay,and I was very popular at 13. 我现在混的不错十三岁时也很受欢迎n school? 在学校吗Oh, no. At home. 那倒不是是在家里The servants would sing to me, 仆人们会给我唱歌laugh at my jokes... 喜欢我讲的笑话wish I knew their names. 可惜我不知道他们的名字Does the study say 这项研究有没有说what happens to the unpopular kids? 不受欢迎的孩子们会怎么样啊Y ou tell me... you 你说呢刚刚跟你一块儿起床的人woke up in bed with one. 就是个活生生的例子Listen to this. 跟你们说件事just received an e-mail from Wil Wheaton. 刚刚威尔·惠顿给我发了封邮件Leonard Nimoy's son is working on a documentary 说伦纳德·尼莫伊的儿子正在制作一部纪录片that he started with his father before he passed away. 这部纪录片是他父亲生前跟他合作的t's about Mr. Spock and his impact on our culture. 是关于史波克先生及其对美国文化的影响Why is he writing to you? 他为什么给你发邮件Well, they're looking for fans to interview, 他们想采访一位粉丝and Wil thought I'd be good for it. 威尔觉得我很合适Oh. Hey, high five. 哇不错嘛来击个掌Absolutely not. 才不要Y eah, Penny, 对了佩妮you spent some time in front of the camera. 关于拍摄你有些经验。

第一季1.Pilot (试播集):帮penny拿电视事件。

2.The Big Bran Hypothesis (宅女假说): Sheldon帮penny整理房间事件。

3.The Fuzzy Boots Corollary (模糊靴推论):Leonard想和leslie发展感情失败，抑郁，后和penny约会事件。

4.The Luminous Fish Effect (发光新人效应):Sheldon被炒事件。

（luminous fish）5.The Hamburger Postulate(汉堡公设): Leonard和leslie ONS，Sheldon不知所措事件。

6.The Middle Earth Paradigm(中土范式): 万圣节舞会事件。

（多普勒效应）7.The Dumpling Paradox(饺子佯谬): penny朋友和Howard。

penny玩光晕。

中餐馆点菜事件。

8.The Grasshopper Experiment(小人物实验): 鸡尾酒事件。

（Raj相亲）9.The Cooper-Hofstadter Polarization(Cooper-Hofstadter 极化): 物理发表会事件。

（意念爆头、远程灯控及四川男生）10.The Loobenfeld Decay(Loobenfeld衰变): penny唱歌引起的Sheldon撒谎事件。

（Sheldon的“堂弟”Leo）11.The Pancake Batter Anomaly(面糊异常): Sheldon感冒事件。

12.The Jerusalem Duality(耶路撒冷对偶): Sheldon嫉妒15岁棒子事件。

13.The Bat Jar Conjecture(Bat Jar 猜想): 物理竞赛事件14.The Nerdvana Annihilation(完全Geek湮灭): 时光机事件。

（Sheldon的莫洛克人梦）15.The Pork Chop Indeterminacy(少女测不准): Sheldon的妹妹来了事件。

- Hey, have you ever heard of the Van Nuys Comic-Con? - Yeah. -你有听说过加州凡奈斯漫展吗 -有啊It's a dinky little convention where they sell collectibles 就是个破烂小展览卖卖收藏物and get sad D-list celebrities to appear. Why? 请一些不知名惨兮兮的小咖出场怎么了I got asked to sign autographs there. 我被邀请去办签名会That's awesome! 太屌啦Is this for Serial Ape-ist? 是因为《杀人恶猿》吗Well, it could be for the monkey movie. 可能是因为这部猴子电影It could be my hemorrhoid commercial. 也可能是因为我拍的痔疮广告The list does not go on. 反正可能性只有这俩- When is it? - It doesn't matter. -什么时候 -这不重要- I'm not doing it. - What? Why not? -我才不去 -为什么为啥不去You just said yourself, it's sad. 你刚才自己说了很惨啊Yeah, but it's not pathetic. 但没有到可悲啊That's where I draw the line. 我的底线就是不可悲则可行Come on! We'll have fun. 去嘛肯定有意思I don't know. 我也不知道了You'll have nerds fawning all over you. 会有各种宅男对你摇尾乞怜啊If you don't love that, this marriage is in trouble. 如果你不喜欢这感觉那我们的婚姻要出大事了I guess it wouldn't hurt to meet some fans 好吧去见见粉丝and make a little extra money. 顺便赚点外快也不错Yeah. 对啊Wow! An appearance by George Lucas... 大导演乔治·卢卡斯......'s dermatologist. 的皮肤科医生也会来- Oh, I want that autograph. - Oh, yeah. -他的签名我也要了 -好好好You know, with us living together, 我们现在开始同居了maybe we could think about having people over. 是不是能考虑试试邀请客人来玩We have people over all the time. 我们整天有人来访啊We have the maintenance people, the pizza delivery man... 有维修工还有披萨外送员... ...that UPS driver who feels the need to ask 还有那个觉得有必要来关心how parts of me are hanging. 我最近有没有什么"鸟"事的快递员You know what I meant. 你知道我说的是什么意思All right, fine. 好吧行Let's say that we were to entertain people. 那就假设我们要宴请朋友What type of gathering did you have in mind? 你打算举办哪种聚会呢Huh? A meal? Lunch? 吃饭的话午餐会Brunch? Dinner? 早午餐会还是晚餐会呢Afternoon tea? A formal tea? Hmm? 下午茶的话是正式的吗Is it a party? 还是是个派对呢And if so, what kind of party? 如果是那请问是哪种派对A cocktail party? 是鸡尾酒派对A Tupperware party? 直销产品派对Ooh, yeah-- is it a surprise party? 对了是惊喜派对吗Oh, I hope it's not a West Coast party, 我希望不是《西海岸派对》啊'cause according to the man on the radio, 因为根据电台里这首歌的歌词a West Coast party don't stop. 西海岸派对永不停歇啊I'm sorry I mentioned it. 对不起我不应该提起这事Oh, don't be. You get your hopes up, 不用道歉你心中燃起希望之火I knock them down. That's called teamwork. 我一桶冷水把它浇熄这就叫合作无间That's a kick. 踢了That's an actual kick. 孩子真的踢了一下What are you doing? 你在干嘛I felt a kick. 我感觉到踢了一下There's a baby in there. 里面有一个宝宝呢Oh, yeah, that's where I put it. 对哦原来我把宝宝放这里了Oh, I mean, I know you're pregnant. 我的意思是我知道你怀孕了I just... 只是...never connected the idea of pregnancy 我从来没把怀孕and you actually having a baby. 跟你要生孩子这件事联想到一起Which MIT did you go to? 你去的是哪家麻省理工来着Oh, God, we are not ready to have an infant in this house! 天啊我们这房子还没准备好迎接宝宝啊We don't have a crib, we don't have diapers. 没有婴儿床也没有尿布We're not baby-proofed. 也还没弄婴儿保护措施Anyone can just walk in off the street and lift our toilet lids! 任何人都可以走进家里掀开没锁上的马桶盖Howie, we have time to do all that stuff. 华仔我们还有时间搞那些东西Do we? 真的有吗Look at you. 看看你Willy Wonka would roll you to the juicing room. 就像电影里被推去榨汁的小胖子一样圆The next person kicking you will be me. 下一个踢你的人会是老娘Good night. 晚安Are we even in a good school...? 我们这里是好的学区...I warned you, and I did it. 警告过你了我言出必行What's all this? 这是什么Oh, everything we need for your autograph session-- 你办签名会需要的一切东西- head shots, markers. - Okay. -大头照马克笔 -等等Leonard, it's sweet you're excited about this, 莱纳德你对这事很上心是好事but it'll be a miracle if one person asks for my autograph. 但哪怕是有一个人想要我的签名都能算奇迹Are you kidding? 你在开玩笑吧I once paid $20 for Theo Sassler's signature. 我有一次花20块去讨西奥·杀死勒的签名呢- Who's that? Oh, I don't even know. -他是谁 -我也不认识I just liked his name. Theo Sassler! 我只是觉得他名字炫西奥·杀死勒Oh, and look at this. 你看这个I even got a change maker. 我还弄了一个换零钱机How much change you want, little lady? 你要换多少零钱小姑娘Oh, there's so much I want to change. 我想要换[掉]的东西多了Yeah, well, if it's a dollar, you're in luck. 如果是想要一块钱换硬币你就来得巧了What's going on here? 这是怎么一回事You expressed an interest in having people over, 你表示出了对邀请客人有兴趣and I feel I dismissed it too quickly. 我觉得我太快驳回你的提议了So, I took matters into my own hands, 所以我决定亲自着手此事and I arranged a brunch. 筹办了一场早午餐会Well, that's so nice. 这真是太好了Who's coming? 有谁会来Oh, uh, Stuart, Bert from the geology lab, 斯图尔特地质学实验室的伯特and Mrs. Petrescu from downstairs. 楼下的佩特雷斯库太太You mean the Romanian lady on the second floor? 你是说住二楼的罗马尼亚女士吗Yes. 是的Oh, fun story: 说来也好笑she grew up with ten siblings. 她从小是跟十个兄弟姐妹一起长大Or possibly penguins. Her English is atrocious. 或是跟企鹅一起长大她的英语太烂了That's an odd mix of people. 客人的组合好奇怪啊Well, for our first time hosting, 我们第一次邀请客人来家里I thought it would be wise to conduct a trial run. 我认为先做个试验是明智之举You know, like how I practiced for that Halloween haunted house就像当年我为了万圣节鬼屋练胆by going into the bathroom at the bus station. 于是我去了公车站的厕所You never went into that haunted house. 你后来压根没进那间鬼屋You never saw what jumped out at me at the bus station.那是因为你没看见我在公车站受到什么惊吓Well, thank you, Sheldon. 谢谢你谢尔顿This is a fun surprise. 这真是个有趣的惊喜Well, the real surprise is 真正的惊喜是how surprised you are that I'm great at surprises. 你知道我擅长给人惊喜后有多惊喜Well, that's not a surprise at all. 那根本不算惊喜I mean, if I knew you were good at surprises, 如果我本来就知道你擅长给人惊喜I would have expected the surprise, 那我就会预计到有这个惊喜and therefore not have been surprised. 然后就不会被你"惊喜到"But as it is, I didn't know, 可事实上是我之前不知道and therefore my surprise should be unsurprising. 所以我"惊喜"的样子你根本不该觉得惊喜Don't get me all randy. Guests are on the way. 不许用言语挑逗人家客人随时会到Hi. 回来啦Hey, where you been? 你们去哪儿了Oh, we went and did a little shopping for the baby. 我们去给宝宝买了点东西Wait till you see the crib we found. 你等着瞧我们选的婴儿床吧You bought a crib without me? 你买婴儿床不用问过我吗- You're gonna love it. - Yeah. -你肯定会喜欢的 -对啊It's the highest rated one on the market. 它是市场上评价最好的一款I wouldn't even call it a crib. 要我就不会说那是婴儿床I'd call it a Fortress of Solitude for babies. 我会称其为"宝宝的孤独城堡"Sounds expensive. 听起来就是贵货啊Okay, well, I may have gone a bit overboard, 好吧我可能有点太舍得了but you can't put a price on safety. 可安全是无价之宝啊Though if you did, it's more zeroes than you're expecting. 但如果非要给个价那会比你想象中多很多个0But it's the safest crib you can buy. 但那是市面上最安全的婴儿床And if you don't like it, we can return it. 而且如果你不喜欢我们可以退掉啊- Fine. - In our new minivan. -好吧 -它在我们的新面包车里呢Hey, what's for lunch? 中午吃什么呀You bought a minivan?! 你还买了一辆面包车吗It's for the baby, and I didn't buy it. 那是为了宝宝啊而且我又没买The dealer loaned it to me for a 24-hour test drive. 卖车那人借给我试开一天Though we did ding up the back pretty good with the crib, 但我们搬婴儿床时把车后备厢撞得挺狠的so you might have bought a minivan. 所以你很可能得买下这辆面包车I don't want to drive that. It's such a mom car. 我不想开这车太老妈子风了The guy at the dealership said 卖车那人说they're not just for moms anymore. 这车不再只适用于妈妈Then again, he did think you were my husband. 但我还想说那人的确认为你是我老公They thought it at the ultrasound. 照B超的人也这么想Why not at the car dealership? 卖车的人会这么想也不出奇Never been on this side of the table before. 从来没坐过在桌子的这一端I feel powerful. 感觉可以呼风唤雨啊Really? 是咩I feel like I'm selling candy so our team can get new uniforms. 有种像为了队伍筹款买新制服而卖糖果的感觉Okay, so it's $4.75 for a signed black-and-white 签一张黑白照4块7毛5and $9.95 for a color. 彩照9块9毛5Right. Why not five and ten bucks? 好的干嘛不直接收5块和10块Well, I brought my moneymaker. Let me shake it. 我带了换零钱机[性感本钱] 让人家甩甩嘛Hey, that guy's looking over here. 那个家伙正往这边看呢You think he's your first autograph? 你觉得他会是第一位买你签名的粉丝吗I don't know. Be cool. He's coming. He's coming. 不知道淡定他过来了他过来了I love your movie. 我超爱你的电影Well, thanks. 谢谢It has got to be one of the worst things 绝对是我人生中看过I've ever seen in my life. 最糟糕的东西之一Your love confuses me. 你的爱使我困惑- Would you like an autograph? - Sure. -想来张签名照吗 -好啊- Okay. Who do I make it out to? - Daniel. -好的签给谁 -丹尼尔- Okay. - I have to ask. -好的 -我想知道Were you trying to be that bad, 你是故意演这么烂or are you just a terrible actress? 还是你本身演技就烂That did not clear things up. 您这话更让我摸不着头脑了That'll be $4.75. 一张4块7毛5Keep the change. 不用找了But I... 可我...Nothing about that was good. 全程糟透了There's nothing to be afraid of, Sheldon. 没什么好怕的谢尔顿The average cork speed is 25 miles per hour. 木塞的平均速度是每小时40公里If that is too fast around a school, 如果这速度在学校操场算飞快it is certainly too fast around a kitchen. 那么在厨房也肯定是Been 15 minutes. Just sayin'. 我想说已经耗15分钟了Okay. I can do this. 好吧我能行Just give me a moment... 再给我点时间Mimosas coming up. 含羞草香槟来了I once left orange juice in my fridge so long, 我有一次把橙汁放在冰箱的时间久到it tasted like a mimosa. 它喝起来像含羞草酒How old was it? 到底放了多久It's hard to say. 不好说I don't remember much after I drank it. 我喝完之后就不省人事了Would you like one, Mrs. Petrescu? 你想来一杯吗佩特雷斯库太太Yes. 当然Drink is fun and good friends-- Applebee's. 酒好好友尽在苹果蜂餐厅Drink is fun and good friends-- Applebee's. 美国知名连锁西式平价餐厅She's learning English from TV. 她的英语都是看电视学的TV, good. Now back to you. 电视很棒啊画面回到现场主播Hey, guys. 大伙们Hi, Stuart. 斯图尔特These are for you. 这花是送给你的Oh, they're pretty. Thank you. 好漂亮的花啊谢谢你Stuart, this is Bert from the Caltech geology lab, 斯图尔特这位是加州理工地质实验室的伯特and this is Mrs. Petrescu from downstairs. 这位是楼下的佩特雷斯库太太Nice to meet you. 很高兴认识你们- Hello. - Hey. -你好 -你好So, what did I miss? 我有错过什么吗Eh, we watched Sheldon try to open a bottle for 15 minutes.我们见证了谢尔顿耗费15分钟打开一瓶酒15 minutes can save you 15% or more on car insurance.15分钟可以帮您节省15%以上的汽车保险哦15 minutes can save you 15% or more on car insurance.美国政府雇员保险公司的电视广告台词Anybody else coming to this thing? 这聚会还有其他人来吗What's your name? 你叫什么名字- Jeff. - Okay. -杰夫 -好的My favorite part is your shower scene. 我最喜欢的部分就是你洗澡那一段Been hearing that a lot today. 这话今天我可听了不少次I even have a screen grab on my phone. 我还用手机截了图Yep, there they are. 没错就是这对宝贝Okay, let's keep it moving. 行了快闪吧你Here you go. 给你Should've punched that guy. 我真该揍这个小子Well, go ahead. He's right over there. 想揍就揍吧他就在那儿呢Why do you do that? Can't you let me have my moment? 施主何苦要点破就不能让我意淫一下吗- Hello. - Hi. -你好 -你好I like your movies. 我喜欢你拍的电影- Thank you! - I saw both of them. -谢谢 -两个我都看过哦I assume we're still talking about the movies, 我想你是指我的两部电影吧but after today, who knows. 但根据今日对话 "两个"还真不一定You think I could get a picture of us? 可以和你合影留念吗Oh, sure. 当然And, uh, could you be giving me a kiss? 可以和你接吻留念吗No. She cannot kiss... 不行她不能亲...What is wrong with you people?! 你们都有什么毛病啊- Leonard... - No, no, no. It's not okay. -莱纳德 -不行这样是不对的- Who are you? - I'm her husband. -你是哪根葱啊 -我是她老公No, you're not. 谁信啊I am. 我真的是Yeah, he really is. 对他真是我老公No. 鬼才信It's got a rearview camera, there's a DVD player-- 这车配置了倒车摄像头光盘播放器oh, and check this out. 你再看这个It's like we're living in the future! 是不是感觉自己进入了未来世界Hey, show her the trunk! Show her the trunk! 给她演示后备箱给她演示后备箱Imagine this: you've got the baby in one hand, 想象一下你左手抱着娃groceries in the other, and you're thinking, 右手提着菜你对自己说"How am I gonna open this trunk?" "我要怎么开后备箱呢"I'm probably thinking, "Where's my husband, 我应该会对自己说 "我那个猪头老公呢and why isn't he helping me?" 他为什么不过来帮我"You don't need my help when you can open the trunk 当轻轻一踢就可以打开后备箱时with a simple kick of the foot. 你就根本不需要我帮忙了No, it's a gentle kick; you're doing it wrong. 不人家是轻踢你没做到位Here. Give me those. 来把东西都给我Uh, maybe it was more of a circle? 是不是应该用脚画个圈呀It's weird that guy thought you were a couple. 卖车的人以为你们俩是夫妻完全不"出奇"啊- Yes! - Yes! -开了 -开了See? 看到没Easy. 轻而易举And look at all this cargo space. 看看这宽敞的后备箱空间You know, we'll get the crib out 等我们把婴儿床搬出来and you can take it for a test-drive. 你就可以上车试开了I'm telling you, this van is gonna be... 告诉你这辆厢型车绝对是...Oh, is it your back? 伤到你的背了吗Uh... yeah. 是的Anyway, let's just get in and see if the GPS 没事我们先上车can take us to the nearest emergency room. 试试看导航能否带我们去最近的急诊室So until Amy's apartment is fixed, 所以直到艾米的公寓修好之前she and I are living here together. 她和我都将在这住I lived with my old girlfriend. 我也曾和我的前女友住在一起She was a geologist, too. 她也是位地质学家Things didn't work out? 后来你俩吹了吗I came home from work one day and she had taken everything. 有一天我下班回家她把一切都卷跑了I'm warning you, 友情提示hide your good rocks. 记得把好的石头标本都藏起来My sister's husband took all her things, too. 我妹夫也把她的东西卷跑了Story at 11:00. 11点即将播出Really, no one else is coming? 真的没有其他客人来了吗Oh, this is it. 没有了You are the practice round. 你们这算是练习赛Practice round? For-for what? 练习赛练习什么Uh, no. He-he just means that 不他的意思是you were the first people we thought of. 你们是我们首先想到的人You know, exactly. 没有错We've never thrown a brunch before, 我们从未邀请过别人来吃早午餐and I wanted to work out all the kinks. 我想先试试水So, I'm like a lab rat 所以我就相当于before your real friends come over? 你真正的朋友来之前的小白鼠You see, your words sound reasonable, 你的话非常合理but your face looks angry. 但你的表情非常生气Help me out here. This is not where I shine. 快帮我一下我最不擅长这个了Stuart, you know you're one of our favorite people. 斯图尔特你知道你是我们最爱的朋友之一Okay, now, see, you look sincere, 你的表情非常真挚but your words are completely false. 但你的话却错得离谱I'm glad we did this test run. 幸好我们举行了这个练习赛These brunches are wild! 早午餐可真是不好办啊But how did you get her to go out with you? 你是怎样成功让她同意跟你约会的啊Well, she moved in across the hall. 她刚好搬到了我家对面And he started to slowly wear me down. 他不断纠缠让我慢慢放弃抵抗Like a river carves a canyon. 只要功夫深铁杵也能磨成针Yeah, except the river kept showing me his Pokemon cards. 不同的是磨针的人老是跟我显摆他的宠物精灵卡Ready to go? 可以走了吗Hang on. This guy's telling me 等等这个人跟我说了how he got the Serial Ape-ist girl to marry him. 他怎么让《杀人恶猿》女主嫁给他This guy? 这货吗But he's wearing a change maker. 可他别了个换零钱机I think it's hot. 我觉得特性感That's right. 没错I'm her change daddy. 我是她的零钱干爹What was I thinking? 我当时在想什么呢Wolowitzes are not a lifting people! 沃罗威茨家的人搬不了重物We tip the lifting people! 我们付小费给搬重物的人Do we really have to sit for hours in the emergency room? 我们真要在急诊室里等几个小时吗They're just gonna give you ice and Advil like last time. 还不是会和上次一样给你点冰和止痛药You're gonna feel terrible when I'm in a wheelchair. 等我以后靠轮椅生活你就后悔去吧Which, by the way, would fit easily in the back 顺便说一下真有轮椅也可以轻松地装进of this award-winning minivan. 这台获奖的商旅车的后备箱Fine, we'll go to the E.R. 行了我们去急诊Just stop selling me on the van. 你就别再给这车打广告了You're right. It sells itself. 你说对它自己就是最棒的广告You have to admit, it's a pretty smooth ride. 你也不得不承认行驶确实平稳I was hoping it'd be quieter. 噪音小点就更好了If childbirth is half this bad, 生孩子要有这一半疼you are so screwed! 你就死定了- Are we there yet?! - Soon. -我们到了吗 -快了Why is it taking so long?! 为什么这么久H-Howard, Howard, look at the DVD screen. 霍华德霍华德看屏幕I put on Batman: The Animated Series. Your favorite! 我在播《蝙蝠侠之风云突变》你的最爱I'm in too much pain to watch cartoo... 太疼了没心情看卡通Oh! This is a good one. 这集好看I've been babysitting him way longer than you have. 我带这孩子的时间可比你长多了Fine. I'll buy the stupid van. 行我买这台蠢车还不行吗This is the best blintz I've ever had. 我从来没吃过这么好吃的薄饼Oh. Thank you. 谢谢It almost makes up for the incredibly awkward turn 十分美味只差一点就能挽回things took earlier. 刚刚万分尴尬的局面呢You know what, I-I think I'm just gonna go. 我说我还是走吧No, Stuart, don't. 不斯图尔特别走No, I-I consider you and Sheldon like my family, 不我把你和谢尔顿当成我的家人and I'm not even sure you think of me as a friend. 可我都不确定你们有没有把我当朋友You have any idea how that feels? 你懂那种感受吗We're so sorry. 我们非常抱歉I'm always the last one anybody thinks of. 我总是最后一个被想起的家伙Well, no, that's not true. 不不是这样的I mean, sometimes it's Koothrappali. 偶尔是库萨帕里But we're not supposed to say that 但我们不应该这么说'cause he's a minority. 他是有色人种怕有歧视嫌疑Bye. 再见Stuart, wait. 斯图尔特等等I do know what it feels like to be left out. 我确实知道被冷落的感受I know how it feels, too. 我也知道那种感受All right, this is about me and him; you're not part of it. 知道了这是我和他之间的问题没你事Stuart, perhaps we do take you for granted, 斯图尔特也许我们太不重视你的好and that is not acceptable. 这是不可接受的错误Please know that you truly are a valuable member 但请你知道你真的是我们这个社交团体中of our social group. 非常重要的一员Thank you. 谢谢You know, in fact, I'd like to propose a toast. 这样我想举杯祝酒To Stuart. 敬斯图尔特A fine man, 优秀男子a good friend and a wonderful guest. 好朋友还是一位很棒的客人- Hear, hear. - Cheers. -说得好 -干杯Cheers. Filmed before a live studio audience. 干杯现场观众实况录播And that is how a short asthmatic scientist 这就是一个哮喘矮子科学家landed a stone cold fox. 如何搞定了冷血冰山美人I didn't know you can propose to the same person 我都不知道跟一个人求婚so many times. 居然能求那么多次The third time, I did it in skywriting, 第三次我是让飞机在空中写字求婚but she never looked up. 可惜她始终没抬头看过You know, once, I proposed to him. 还有一次是我跟他求婚的Yeah. I said no. 对被我拒绝了Why? 为什么I just wanted to make her work for it. 想让她多费点功夫争取本少爷啊Yeah, that's gonna cost you later. 对小女子一会儿就"报答"你Hang on. Is she just with you because you're rich? 等等她是为了你有钱才跟你在一起吗She makes more money than I do! 她挣得比我还多What?! Who are you?! 什么您是何方神圣Do you know what else I love about you? 知道我还喜欢你什么吗Y-Your handwriting is impeccable! 你的字写得无可挑剔Thank you for noticing! 感谢你注意到啊No, I mean it. I mean it. 真的我说真的It's like you have the soul of a label maker. 简直像被打标签机灵魂附体了You know what I love about you? Hmm? 知道我喜欢你什么吗You never leave the house without a paper clip! 你出门必备曲别针You never know when two pieces of paper 上天有不测之风云might temporarily need fastening in the top left corner. 两纸有左上角待夹I also love how you never use swear words. 我还喜欢你从来不说脏话You know, it turns out, 但结果是you can hurt people just as well without 'em. 骂人不吐脏字照样杀人于无形Maybe I can get a little help putting some of this stuff away. 谁有空过来帮忙把这些东西收好Oh, calm down. 别激动I already put away five of these! 我不是才把五杯这个"收进"肚里吗You see? 你看吧No muss, no fuss, not a single cuss. 轻松堵上她嘴不用一个脏字。