三顾茅庐2

旁白——话说刘关张桃园三结义之后四处奔波一时间找不到工作不得不在曹操的公司靠看大门为生而此时那个传说中的神秘人物诸葛卧龙先生正专心在家复习考试因为他的老婆黄氏逼着他参加CET-6场景一诸葛亮家诸葛亮上诸葛亮——大家好我就是绝顶聪明的诸葛亮可我最近却很是郁闷我那个娘子非要我去参加什么大学英语六级考试六级考试是个什么东西我怎么听都没听说过还要我看这么厚的书做这么多的题（拿起手里的金瓶梅给大家亮亮）我以后可是要当军师的！！又不是这个专业的干嘛还要要看这种书老婆——相公（远处喊）诸葛亮老婆上（比较啰嗦）诸葛亮——娘子来了我娘子啰嗦的像唐僧一样说起话来我可受不了快老实看书（装作认真）老婆——相公你的书背的怎么样了诸葛亮——娘子这些书太简单了统统不用看（扔书）老婆——你说简单那我考考你听着apple怎么写desk怎么写?诸葛亮——（不会抓耳挠腮）老婆——相公啊你连这都不会可怎么办呀哎呀我错了我真的错了我从一开始就不应该嫁过来如果我不嫁过来就不会流落到这么一个伤心的地方我好后悔呀诸葛亮——崩溃了（捂耳朵忙劝）（娘子哭）诸葛亮——娘子莫哭娘子莫哭相公好好看书就是老婆——（马上变脸）这还差不多书童你快过来书童上书童——主人有何吩咐老婆——书童听着相公近日温习功课外人一律不见来人就说去国外游玩讲学去了书童遵命（嗨，喳）旁白——话正说着刘关张三人已经到了诸葛亮家门口场景二诸葛亮家门口刘关张上张飞——大哥我来叫门（气愤敲门咚咚咚）书童——（从猫眼里看看跟张飞头对上幻灯片配李逵的黑脸吓一跳）莫非是来讨债的（思考开门）刘备——在下刘备特来拜访诸葛卧龙先生和她老婆书童——主人说他不在家刘关张——恩？？？书童——夫人说主人不在家刘关张——恩？？？书童——哦不是主人主人出去游玩了可能很快回来也可能十多天不回来刘备——那我们就在这等他关羽——他那么贪玩谁知道他什么时候回来大哥我们还是走吧旁白——三人离去又过了一个月已是深秋三人第二次登门拜访可是仍然没有见着第三次已经是冬天屋外下着鹅毛大雪诸葛亮知道了刘备上门讨债的事情趁这会老婆黄氏不在赶紧命书童前去开门场景三诸葛亮家门口（下大雪）刘关张书童上张飞——大哥下次要见诸葛小儿你先给我老三说一声我把他绑来见你如此劳烦哥哥甚是无礼刘备——哎二弟三弟现在欠钱的都是大爷我们还是再去一回吧一定要诚心诚意才能打动人家（抹眼泪幻灯片放杨白劳与黄世仁咚咚咚敲门）书童——主人今天在家（诸葛亮拿着金瓶梅从身后走过）但是正在看书请你们等一等张飞——（等不及了）诸葛小儿快出来大哥二哥帮我照顾好我七舅老爷他外甥女。

你要是不出来我就一把火把你这房子烧了！！关羽——葵花点穴手（幻灯片配合张飞定住眼睛睁得大大的）哎二弟呀大哥说了你几次了我们是有文化的人做人要斯文要低调懂不别一上来就舞刀弄枪的我们是来要债的又不是来要命的你把人家砍死了谁来给我们还债呀刘备——二弟呀现在次贷危机那么严重怎么这点道理你还不懂呢？明白了你就眨眨眼睛张飞——（眨眼）关羽葵花解穴手张飞——哎二哥（耸耸肩）你这点穴是那里学的关羽——呵呵是看了一部很流行的电视剧武林外传学的张飞——二哥你怎么不早说要早知道你会这么一身手艺我们三兄弟不如去开个武官早就发财啦关羽——是呵这主意不错书童——主人在看书不可无礼刘备——哎呀你们俩就别打岔了安静点旁白——诸葛亮正在兴奋的时候老婆黄氏突然回来场景四诸葛亮家诸葛亮老婆刘备上诸葛亮——刘备我终于把他给等来了哈哈哈刘备——先生身居山林却对天下大事了如指掌不知先生可否随刘备一同下山共图霸业诸葛亮——（眼珠子转转）可是我已经习惯了现在的生活看来不能帮你。

刘备——（急）如果先生不帮我天下的百姓又要受苦请先生莫要推辞（抱腿）诸葛亮——这。

这也不是不行。

只是家家都有本难念的经，小弟近日正在为英语六级烦恼，贱内逼的紧啊，如果刘皇叔能将此事帮在下了结，在下必随刘皇叔下山，赴汤蹈火再所不辞。

刘备——（面有难色）这。

张飞——（拉刘备到身边耳语到）大哥，这年头，牛奶都有假货了，我们找枪手，买答案怎么不行啊。

（幻灯片武状元苏乞儿作弊呢段）关羽——要不我们让曹操预付我们两个月的工资，先把答案给他买了说。

（假答案图片）场景五诸葛亮家旁白——一个月后，因为所有的钱都拿去买了答案刘关张已饿的面黄肌瘦，破衣烂衫。

书童——好消息好消息主人六级考了600分老婆——什么！！600分！！这下终于可以毕业了太好了不负我十年寒窗苦，不负我夜夜伴君读我的美好生活就要来了房子！车子！！钞票！！！（房子、车子的图片）场景六诸葛亮家老婆——老公好男儿以事业为重你去吧不要想我。

诸葛亮——亲爱的我要远行了你要照顾好自己（转身悄悄说）别担心肯定不想你！！（出门拜倒在久侯的刘备关羽张飞脚下）主公您的大恩亮永世难忘定当鞠躬尽瘁死而后已刘备——快快请起！！旁白——三顾茅庐的故事就此完结。

结束谢谢观赏（结束时放猫和老鼠的结尾）Aside: After their swearing brotherhood to heaven and earth in a peach garden, the three persons—Liubei, Guanyu and Zhangfei had to be guards in Caocao's corporation to make a living for they could not find jobs. Meanwhile the legendary and mysterious character ZhuGeliang who had been forced to attend CET-6 test by his wife was reviewing examination contents.SCENE 1ZhuGeliang: Good morning! I am the genius ZhuGeliang. But I feel so boring recently. Because my wife forced me to pass theCET-6. What’s CET-6? Do you know? Y ou?(Ask theaudience) I’ve never heart about that. And she obliged me toread so heavy books and do so many texts. It’s ridiculous. Mymajor is military advice, not English. Why should I read this? Wife: Darling!ZhuGeliang：My wife is coming，she is so long-winded that I can never bear her.Wife：My dear, how about your study?ZhuGeliang：T hese books are too easy for your husband and don’t need to learn.Wife：Are you sure? let me have a test to you. Listen，can you spell apple？Desk?ZhuGeliang: Sorry I can’t.Wife：Y ou can’t? Oh, how unfortunate I am! (crying) I'm wrong, I'm really wrong, I'm wrong from the beginning. I shouldn't marry here.If I didn’t marry here, I'll never in this heartrending placenowZhuGeliang：Don’t cry, don’t cry, stop! I ‘m going to study hard at once. Wife (laugh): That's the spirit! Come on quickly! Boy!Keeper: What is the matter? Madam?Wife: Listen carefully! My husband is too busy doing his homework to welcome any people, so you will tell the people who calls onhim that boss has went to study in England.Keeper:Hey!Aside: While it is going on, liu-Guan-Zhang have came to the gate of ZhuGeliang·s house.SCENE 2Zhangfei: Let me knock the door! Open! Open!!!Keeper:(Check from the peep hole) Are these men asking for the debt?(Open the door)Liubei: This is liubei! We are calling on ZhuGeliang and his wife.Keeper:Boss said he is not in.L-G-Z:En????Keeper: Madam said our boss is not in.L-G-Z:En????Keeper:Oh! No!...I mean …I mean my boss is studying English in England for the exam of CET-6,and he may not be come backthis month.Liubei:OK! We will wait for him here!Guanyu: Nobody knows that when he will be come back, so, let’s go home!Aside:The three men went away with disappointed. After a month, the deeply autumn came! They came here at the second time.Unfortunately, they didn`t see Zhugeliang as well . Two monthpassed, the cold winter is coming! It is heavy snow and very coldoutsides. ZhuGeliang knows the reason that why they come herethree times, and orders the keeper to let them come in while hiswife is out.SCENE 3Zhangfei: My brother,please tell me in time when you would see him next time, let me bind him up for you. It really should not troubleyou to come here time and time again.Liubei:These days, the borrower is the god! Let’s go there again and show our the warmest heart to move them.(Knock the door) Keeper：My boss is at home today, but he is reading books about CET-6.Please wait for a moment!Zhangfei：Xiao Zhu! Come out! Brothers, help me to take care of my seventh uncle and his third niece. Get out, or I will burn yourhouse down!Guanyu: Sunflower press! AI. Litter brother, big brother has said several times, We are intellectuals, understand? Don't be so rude, weare here for debt, not for his life. If you will kill him, where isour money?Liubei: The Subprime mortgage crisis is so serious, don`t you know that simple reason? If you know, please bat your eyes! Zhangfei——(Bat eyes)Keeper: Don`t interrupt!!!! Boss is reading!!!Liubei: Keep quite!!!Aside: At this time, zhugeliang is exciting, but his wife come back soon.SCENE 4ZhuGeliang: Thank goodness, here's Liubei at last. Ha ha ha ...Liubei: En...you know so much about affairs, are you willing to create a new country together with us?ZhuGeliang: But I can’t help you, I have accustom the life at present. Liubei: If you don’t help me , the citizen will live a harder life , please don’t refuse.ZhuGeliang: En……sorry, I can’t. Because my wife forces me to pass the CET-6 recently. If you can help me to resolve the problem, Iwill help you.Liu: En…..Zhangfei: (Pull) Brother, come here. Everything is fake now such as the milk. Why can’t we find somebody help us do the test or buy a answer?Guanyu: Y es! We can advance our salary from Caocao to buy the answer at first.SCENE 5Aside: Because the salary has been given to zhugeliang to buy the answer, Liubei Guanyu Zhangfei have been starving for one month. Keeper：（Happy）Sir , you are really a god . CET6 has got 600 scores.Wife：What happened? 600 scores? Oh! After your Master graduates, happy life will approach. Cars, house, money!Aside: After receiving the master degree, ZhuGeliang will go to work with Liubei to establish a new Kingdom.So the couples apart.SCENE 6Wife：Honey! Excellent man have a long-range ambition. Y ou should put cause above everything else , are sure not to miss me ZhuGeliang：I will have a long journey .Please take care of yourself.(Turn around) Don`t worried, never miss you!!(Run)(To Liubei)Y our Majesty, I will never forget your favour. I should be loyal and devoted to the last.L-G-Z: Let' go!!!!!Aside: The three men go down to the hill. That is the end of the whole story.Thank you for your attention.。