-Oh, Drake. -I'm sorry, Amber. 崔克抱歉，安柏It's like Brad to have to have the last word. 布莱就是这样子，嘴巴不认输Sorry I'm late. What happened? 抱歉，我迟到了，怎么样？We wanna see the end. 我们在看结局I want you, Drake. 我要你，崔克I know you do. 这个我知道But we can never be together that way. 但我们永远不可能会有结果的What? 什么？There's something I never told you. 有件事我一直没有告诉你I'm actually your half-brother. 我是你的异母哥哥So what happens next? 那后来怎么样呢？I get the medical award for separating the Siamese twins. 我帮连体婴动分割手术得了医学奖Then Amber and I go to Venezuela to meet our other half-brother, Ramon...然后我跟安柏去委内瑞拉找另外一个异母哥哥雷蒙…我找到了世界最大的翡翠...where I find the world's biggest emerald. It's really big. …那真的很大But it's cursed. 但受了诅咒So cool! 好酷喔God, that is good TV! 天啊，真是个好节目God, that is good TV! The One Where Dr. Ramoray DiesGod, that is good TV! 六人行第2季第18集瑞摩瑞医生之死Pheebs, play with me! 菲菲，跟我玩嘛This game is grotesque! 不，这种游戏太畸型了Twenty armless guys joined at the waist by a steel bar... 居然把二十个手无寸铁的男人串成一长条…...forced to play soccer forever? …被迫无止境地踢足球Hello? Human rights violation! 简直是侵害人权嘛Don't feel so bad. After playing... 不要为他们难过等他们踢完足球之后…我把小塑胶妞拿出来...I break out the plastic women and everybody has a good time. …大家都会非常开心的呀Why don't you play with your roommate? 你干嘛不跟你室友玩？He's not a big fan of foosball. 他不爱玩桌上足球Are we not getting along with the new boy? 你跟那个新来的处得不好吗？No, he's all right. He spends most of his time in his room. 不是啊，他很好，只是多数的时间都关在房间里That's because you haven't gotten to know him. 我想那也许是因为你没有花时间去了解他Let's remedy that, shall we? 我们来补救，好不好？-We don't need to. -lt'll be fun! 我们不需要补救要啊，会很好玩的What was that? 什么事？I thought it'd be fun if we had beers and got to know each other. 我只是想我们三人来喝点啤酒彼此了解一下会很有意思All right. 好呀Oh, good! Okay. 听起来不错Oh, no! I have to go, because I'm late for... 不行，我得走了因为我还要赶去…绿蛋与火腿”的研讨会... my Green Eggs and Ham discussion group. …“Tonight, it's "Why he would not eat them on a train." 今天晚上主题是… “为什么不在火车上吃呢？”-Have fun! Bye! -That was so lame. 好好玩，拜好烂的藉口I know. 我知道Okay, talk to him. 你跟他谈So you think that Speed Racer guy gets a lot of tickets or...? 你想那个赛车手被开了多少罚单啊…？That's good. So who broke up with who? 好笑…谁甩了谁啊？I broke up with her. 我甩了她呀She actually thought Sean Penn was the capital of Cambodia. 她真的以为西恩潘是高棉的首都When everybody knows that the capital of Cambodia is.... 有没有搞错？大家都知道高棉的首都是…It's not Sean Penn. 不是西恩潘I got a funny one. 好，我有个好笑的My last girlfriend, Tilly. We're eating breakfast, right? 好，我前任的女友叫提莉我们在吃早餐I made these pancakes. Like, 50 pancakes. 我做了很多薄松饼大概有五十多个吧All of a sudden, she turns to me and says, "Eddie... 突然间她转过来她就说艾迪…我不想再跟你见面了... I don't wanna see you anymore." …It was literally like she had reached into my chest... 那就好像是她把手伸进我的胸膛里…... ripped out my heart and smeared it all over my life! …挖出了我的心把我的生活搞得乱七八糟的There was this incredible abyss and I'm falling. 那就像我面前有一个深渊我就一直往下掉I keep falling and I don't think I'm ever gonna stop! 我就一直往下掉永无止境地往下掉That wasn't such a funny story. 这个故事不太好笑，是不是？And a crusty old man Said I'll do what I can 一个坏脾气老头说我尽量And the rest of the rats Played maracas 其他老鼠开始摇响葫芦That's it! Thanks! Good night. 唱完了，谢谢，晚安Phoebe's got another job, right? 菲比有别的工作吧？Great set tonight, Pheebs. 唱得很好，菲菲I know. 我知道We should get going. 我想我们该走了We should too. I've got patients at 8 in the morning. 我们也该走了明天早上八点还有病人You know how we always stay at your apartment? 知道吗？我在想我们老是在你那边过夜I thought tonight we'd stay at my place. 或许今晚改住我那边啊I don't know. I don't have my jammies. 我不知道，我没有带我的睡衣You don't need them. 或许你不需要My baby sister, ladies and gentlemen. 我的小妹妹，各位先生女士Shut up. I'm happy. 闭嘴，我很快乐Oh, this is so nice! I have to make a speech. 这太棒了我必须说几句话Of all the guys that Monica has been with, and that is a lot... 我只是想说，在摩妮卡交过的为数众多的男友当中…我最喜欢你了...I like you the best. …Thank you, Pheebs. That's very sweet. 谢谢你，菲菲，嘴真甜You hear that? 听到了吗？She likes me best. And apparently, there have been a lot. 她最喜欢我而且你显然阅人无数Not a lot. 没有啦Phoebe's kidding. Phoebe's crazy. 菲比在说笑吧，菲比是疯子Phoebe's dead. 菲比死定了I'm looking for Eddie Manoick. 我来找一位曼艾迪He's not here right now. I'm Chandler. 他现在不在我叫钱德Can I take a message or.... Or a fish tank? 要我帮你留话还是…拿鱼缸呢？Thanks. 谢了Come on in. 请进I'm Tilly. 我叫提莉I gather by that "Oh," he told you about me. 看你这个样子他一定跟你提过我了Yeah, your name came up... 提过，你的大名在一段…令我惊心动魄的对话中曾经出现过了...in a conversation that terrified me to my very soul. …He's kind of intense. 他这人有点激烈吧Yes! Hey, can I ask you, is Eddie a little... 对呀，请问你艾迪是不是有一点…A little what? 有一点怎么样？有点乡村？...bit country? …Come on in, you roomie! 快进来呀，室友Hello, Tilly. 提莉Eddie, I just came by to drop off your tank. 艾迪，我只是把鱼缸送过来That was very thoughtful of you. 你想得真是周到It's very thoughtful. 非常体帖Well, okay then. 就这样了I'm gonna go. Bye. 我要走了，再见So we getting a fish? 那么我们养鱼了，是不是？You had sex with her. 你们上床了，是不是？Check it out, check it out! 菲菲，你看…我最喜欢的文摘之一Soap Opera Digest! That's one of my favorite digests! “肥皂剧文摘” Page 42! Page 42! 42页…"New Doc on the Block, Days of our Lives Joey Tribbiani." 医界新秀“我们的日子”崔乔伊Cool picture! 好酷的照片Oh, I look good. 我好帅Is this true? That you write a lot of your own lines? 这是真的吗？很多台词都是你自己写的吗？Well, kind of, yeah. 可以这么说啦Remember last week when Alex was in the accident? 像你记得上礼拜亚历出了事那一集吗？The line in the script was... 剧本上的台词是…我们不送这女人... "If we d on't get this woman to a hospital, she's going to die." …“去医院的话，她会死的”But I made it, "If this woman doesn't get to a hospital... 被我改成了这个女人不去医院就医的话…...she's not gonna live." …她会活不成的Oh, okay. I see what you did there. 我懂你做了什么了Aren't you afraid the writers will be kind of mad when they read this? 那你不怕那些编剧看到这篇文章会有点生气吗？I never thought about the writers. The scripts just come to my house. 我倒没有考虑到那些编剧剧本总是送来我家But you know what? 但你知道吗？This makes me look good, which makes the show look good... 这样让我很有面子也因为这样子，节目有面子…...which makes the writers look good. So how could they bemad? …也因为这样子，编剧有面子他们怎么可能会生我的气呢？...which makes the writers look good. So how could they be mad? 我们的日子Makes up most of his lines. 他编了自己大部份的台词Son of a.... 很好…Write this, jerk-weed. 写这个，混蛋I fall down an elevator shaft? 我跌下了电梯井What does this mean? I fall down an elevator shaft? 这什么意思？我跌下了电梯井I don't know. I just bring the scripts. 我不知道，我只是送剧本过来They can't kill me! I'm Francesca's long-lost son! 他们不能杀我我是兰琪失散的儿子呀Right. 对Could you sign? 请你签收，好吗？No! No way! I'm not signing that! 我才不签呢I don't think that will affect the plot of the show. 我不认为对那个节目的剧情会有影响啊How can they do this to me? 他们怎么能这么对我？All right, I'm just gonna go. 我要走了Sorry. 很遗撼Well, it wasn't that many guys. 也没有那么多个啦If you consider how many guys there actually are... 我是说，如果你考虑到全世界有多少男人…...it's a very small percentage. …那个比例非常小It's not that big a deal. I was just curious. 没什么大不了的我只是…好奇罢了-Good night. -Good night, Richard. 晚安晚安，理查Good luck, Mon. 祝你好运，摩妮卡Before I tell you, you tell me how many women you've been with. 好，我说之前你先说你有过几个女人Two. 两个Two? Two? 两个？…How is that possible? I mean... 那怎么可能？…... have you seen you? …你知道你长得有多帅吗？I mean, what can I say? 我能说什么呢？I was married to Barbara for 30 years, my high-school sweetheart.我跟芭芭拉做了三十年的夫妻我们在高中就认识了Now you. That's two. 加上你，一共两个Two it is. 那就两个吧Time for bed. I'm gonna brush my teeth. 该上床了我要去刷牙了No, wait a minute now! 你先等一等Come on, it's your turn. 来啊，换你了Oh, come on! 快说呀You know, I don't need the actual number. Just a ballpark. 我也不需要知道确实的数目只要差不多就可以了Okay, it is definitely less than a ballpark. 绝对比一个“大厦”还要少I am so glad I'm not Monica right now. 真庆幸现在我不是摩妮卡Tell me about it. 那还用说So what's your magic number? 你的神奇数字是多少？Come on, you know everyone I've been with. All both of them. 来嘛，我交过的你都认识两个你都认识Well, there's you. 有你Better not be doing these in order. 最好不要说我是第一个Billy Dreskin, Pete Carny. 崔比利，柯彼得Barry. 贝利Paolo. 还有…保罗Oh, yes, the weenie from Turinie. 对，托里尼来的蠢蛋Honey, are you jealous of Paolo? 蜜糖，你嫉妒保罗吗？I'm so much happier with you than I ever was with him. 跟他从没像跟你在一起这么快乐过-Really? -Oh, please! 真的？拜托That Paolo thing was barely a relationship. 跟保罗那一段根本就不能算All it really was was just meaningless, animal sex. 那只能算是无意义的野兽的性关系Okay, you know, that sounded so much better in my head. 我这么说让我自己觉得好多了I didn't sleep with your ex-girlfriend. 艾迪我没有跟你的前任女友上床That's exactly what someone who slept with her would say. 有意思，因为跟她上过床的人都会这么说This is nuts! Crazy! She came over for two minutes... 你疯了，你疯了，是不是？她只来了两分钟而已…丢下鱼缸就走了就是这样...dropped off a fish tank and left! …Where's Buddy? 巴迪在哪里？Buddy? 巴迪？My fish, Buddy. 我的鱼巴迪There was no fish when she dropped it off. 她根本就没有带鱼来里面没有任何东西This is unbelievable! 这真令人难以置信You sleep with my ex-girlfriend, insult my intelligence by lying... 你先跟我的前任女友上床以为我会笨到去相信你的谎言...then you kill my fish? My Buddy? 然后你杀了我的鱼我的巴迪？I didn't kill your fish! 我没有杀你的鱼啊Look, Eddie 你听我说，艾迪…Would you look at what I'm doing? 你看我在做什么，好不好？Now that can't be smart. 那样太不聪明了So we're just gonna take this guy right off you... 所以我们要把那个傢伙给拿开…把它放到我的口袋先生里...and put him here in Mr. Pocket. …Tangelo? 来个橘子吧That's it? That's the giant number you were afraid to tell me? 就这样吗？害怕告诉我的庞大数目吗？Well, that's not bad at all. 那还好嘛You had me thinking it was, like, a fleet. 我是说，你害我以为你有一“托拉库”的人You're okay with it? 你真的觉得没关系？Oh, honey, I'm fine. 亲爱的，没关系Okay, about that two. 对了，关于那两个…What? 什么？All right. 好吧What about my two? 我的“两个”怎么样？It just seems like a really small number. 只是听起来真的好少喔Right. 对呀Don't you have a lot of wild oats to sow? 我是说，难道你没有欲望到处去采花吗？Or is that what you're doing with me? Oh, my God! Am I an oat? 你现在就是在那样对我吗？天啊，我是花吗？Honey, you are not an oat. 亲爱的，你不是被采的花I don't know, I guess I'm just not an oat guy. 我不知道我猜我不是那一型的I've only slept with women I love. 我只跟我爱的女人上床You've only slept with two people. 但是你只跟两个人上过床Right. 对You know I love you too, right? 你一定知道我也爱你吧？Now I do. 现在我知道了Ross, please listen to me. 罗斯…拜托听我说You are so much better for me than Paolo ever was. 罗斯，你比保罗好太多了You care about me, you're loving, you make me laugh. 我是说，你关心我我心中有爱，你会逗我笑If I make you laugh, here's an idea. 那样的话，我有个主意Invite Paolo to have a romp in the sack... 你可以邀请保罗过来在床上野兽一下…而我就站在角落讲敲门的笑话...and I'll stand in the corner and tell knock-knock jokes! …What we have is special! All Paolo and I ever had was 罗斯，我们的感情很特别！我跟保罗有的只是…野兽的性关系”？"Animal sex"? “So what are you saying? 所以你什么意思呢？There's nothing between us "animal" at all? 你是说我们之间就没有任何“兽性”的东西吗There's not even, like, a little animal? 连一点点…一点兽性都没有？Not even, like... 甚至连…连像…花栗鼠性...chipmunk sex? …Try to hear me, okay? 拜托，你听我说I'm not gonna lie to you. 我不想对你说谎-lt was good with Paolo. -Knock-knock. 跟保罗的性很好敲敲门But what you and I have is so much better. 但我们两个之间的比那好多了We have tenderness, we have intimacy, we connect. 我们有温柔，我们有亲密我们灵犀相通You know? I swear. 而且我发誓This is the best... 我从来没有过…像你这么棒的... I have ever had. …Until now. 直到现在Richard told me he loved me. 理查刚说他爱我-Oh, my God! -I know! 天啊我知道Honey, that's great! 太棒了I know! 我知道-I just can't find -Top drawer. 我只是找不到… 在第一个抽屉-Hurry. -Why? You need one too? 你也要啊对呀Found them! 找到了There's only one. 只有一个We'll be right there. We're just trying to decide something. 我马上来我们…在决定事情-They're trying to decide something. -Good. Good, good. 她们两个在决定事情好，很好So was your mustache Did it used to be different? 你的…你的小胡子跟以前有不同吗？How do you, you know, keep it so neat? 你怎么能够保持得那么整齐？I have a comb. 我有一把小梳子-What is that? -A mustache comb. 那个梳子叫什么？胡子梳Thank you. 谢谢Okay, I will do your laundry for one month. 我帮你洗一个月的衣服I will, I will, I will.... 我会…我会…I will clean the apartment for two months. 我打扫两个月的房子，如何？I'll give this to you now, if you tell me where we keep the dustpan. 只要你告诉我我们把畚箕放在哪里，这个我现在给你So were you in Nam? 你有没有打过越战？-Rock, paper, scissors? -Gotcha. 剪刀石头布没问题One, two, three. 一，二，三Yes! 太棒了Fine. Go have sex. 很好，上床吧No! You have got it completely wrong! 不对，你完完全全搞错了John Savage was Deer Hunter, no legs. 强沙维奇是“越战猎鹿人”，没有腿Jon Voight was Coming Home, couldn't feel his legs. 强沃特是“归乡”，腿瘫痪了You've got it totally the other way around, my friend. Jon Voight 你完完全全搞反了，朋友强沃特是…-Honey? -What? 亲爱的什么？Shall we? 进去吧It's not gonna happen. 今晚不可能了They're doing it tonight. We can do it tomorrow. 今天晚上他们做我们可以明天再做In the future, if I could see the schedule beforehand.... 下一次的时间表可不可以先让我看看？So when I woke up this morning... 我今天早上醒过来的时候…发现他偷了我所有的鞋垫... he'd stolen all the insoles out of my shoes! …Why? 为什么？He thinks I slept with his ex-girlfriend and killed his fish. 那傢伙以为我睡了他前任女友而且还杀了他的鱼Why would you kill his fish? 你干嘛杀了他的鱼？Because sometimes after you sleep with someone... 菲比，因为有时候你跟人上床之后…就必须要杀条鱼...you have to kill a fish. …Chandler, honey... 钱德，宝贝…... I'm sorry. …抱歉Can we watch Joey's show now, please? 可以看乔伊的节目了吗？Wait. He's not here yet. 等等，他还没有到He knows what happens. 他知道情节I'm fine about my problem now, by the way. 对了，我不在乎我的问题了Amber... 安柏…...I'll always be there for you... …你需要的时候永远有我…...as a friend and as your brother. …我是你一辈子的朋友跟兄弟Oh, Drake. 崔克Hard day, huh? 辛苦了First the medical award, now this? 先是医学大奖，然后是这个Some guys are just lucky, I guess. 是呀，我猜有些人天生好运Dr. Ramoray, report to first floor Emergency stat. 雷大夫，请到一楼急诊室报到Well, then... 那么…... I guess that's me. …我猜在叫我了Anyone else need to go on the elevator? Dr. Horton? Dr. Wall? 还有谁想坐电梯的？何大夫？华大夫？They only said you. 他们只叫你一个人啊Oh, okay. All right. 好吧I love you. 我爱你，崔克Yeah, whatever. 是呀，随便啦Oh, no! 不…Drake, look out! 崔克，小心，崔克…-Did they just kill off Joey? -No! 他们刚刚甩了乔伊不Now maybe. 好像真的Come on! Open up! We want to talk to you! 开门，我们想跟你谈一谈I don't feel like talking! 我不想谈Come on! We care about you. 别这样了，乔伊我们关心你-We're worried about you. -And some of us really have to pee! 我们很关心你我们有些人真的很急呀I'm sorry, Joey. 抱歉，乔伊Listen, sorry about your death. That really sucks. 听着，很遗撼你的死真的很惨耶-We came over as soon as we saw. -How could you not tell us? 我们一看到就赶过来了你怎么不告诉我们呢？I don't know. I was kind of hoping no one would ever find out. 我不知道我有点希望没有人会发现Well, maybe they could find a way to bring you back. 或许他们可以让你起死回生They said that when they found my body, my brain was so smashed in...他们说当找到我尸体的时候我的脑袋已经摔得稀巴烂了…而唯一救得了我的人是我...that the only doctor who could've sav ed me was me. …It's supposed to be some kind of irony. 说是故意要看起来讽刺什么的But Joey, you're gonna be fine. 乔伊，你不会有事的You don't need that show. It was just a dumb soap opera. 你不需要那个节目那只是个蠢的肥皂剧嘛This was the greatest thing that ever happened to me. 菲比，那是我这辈子最棒的事Yes! I was going to incorporate that. 没错，我本来还要那样说的Here's Monica. She'll have something nice to say. 很好，摩妮卡来了她会说句好听的啦I straightened out your shower curtain so you won't get mildew. 我把你的浴帘拉直了以免发霉What? To me, that's nice. 怎么了？那是好事啊It'll be okay. You know that. 不要紧的，你也知道嘛No, I don't. 不，我不知道It's like you work your whole life for something... 像你奋斗了一辈子去追求…...and you think that when you get it... …当你认为你办到的时候…永远不会像你想的一样好...it'll never be as good as you thought. …But this so was. 不过这个是啊It changed everything. 它改变了一切Like, the other day, I got this credit card application... 前几天呢，我去申请信用卡…...and I was pre-approved! …我竟然被保送过关了I've never been pre-approved for anything in my life! 我这辈子从没被保送过关过I'm sorry, man. 很遗撼，老兄I don't know if this'll mean anything to you... 乔伊我不知道这对你有没有意义…但我们总是会保送你过关... but you'll always be pre-approved with us. …That means nothing to me. 不，那对我没有意义Pecan sandy? Just made them. 大胡桃饼，刚出炉的Yeah, all right. 对，好Are these raisins? 这是什么？葡萄干吗？Sure, why not? 当然了，有何不可？Listen, Eddie. 听我说，艾迪I've been thinking about our living situation. 我想过我们目前住在一起的情况了Why are you smiling? 你为什么要笑？I got a little surprise. Look. There's a new fishy. 我有个小小的惊喜我买了条新鱼I named him... 我叫它…... Chandler, you know, after yo u. …钱德，以你为名Well, that's not even a real fish. 那根本不是一条真鱼啊No, that's a Goldfish cracker. 那是金鱼饼干耶So what's your point, man? 你要说什么？Okay, good night. 晚安了You big freak of nature! 大自然爱好者-Brisk tonight. -Oh, man. 今天晚上好冷老兄。
