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《老友记》第一季第一集
（中央咖啡厅）
没什么好说的！他只不过是我的同事
There's nothing to tell. It's just some guy I work with.
少来了，和你交往的男人…
Come on. You're going out with a guy.
多多少少一定有点问题！
There's gotta be something wrong with him.
他既驼背又戴假发？
So does he have a hump and a hair piece?
等一下，他是不是会吃粉笔？
Wait. Does he eat chalk?
我只是不希望你重蹈我和卡尔的覆辙
I don't want her to go through what I went through with Carl. Oh.
各位放轻松，这不算约会
Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date.
不过是两个人一起出去吃晚餐而且不上床
It's just two people going out to dinner and not having sex.
对我来说这就是约会
Sounds like a date to me.
做了个梦，在中学时代我站在餐厅中央…
I'm back in high school, in the middle of the cafeteria...
突然发现自己全身赤裸
...and I realize I'm totally naked.
对，没错我做过那样的梦
Oh, yeah. I've had that dream.
我低头一看，看见有一个电话…
Then I look down and I realize there is a phone...
在那里
...there.
而不是…没错
Instead of... That's right!
我没做过那样的梦没有
That one, I've never had. No.
突然，那个电话响了
All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring.
结果是我妈妈打来的
And it turns out it's my mother.
这非常奇怪因为她从来都不会打电话给我！
Which is very, very weird because she never calls me.
嗨
Hi.
这家伙说〝嗨〞的时候我却想杀了我自己
This guy says "hello," I wanna kill myself.
你还好吧，亲爱的？
Are you okay, sweetie?
我就感觉好像某人伸手进我的喉咙抓住我的小肠，从我的嘴里拉出来 I feel like someone grabbed my small intestine, pulled it out of my mouth...
再在我的脖子上打结…要吃饼干吗？
...and tied it around my neck. Cookie?
卡萝今天搬走了她的东西
Carol moved her stuff out today.
哦
Oh.
我给你拿杯咖啡谢谢
Let me get you some coffee. Thanks.
呃
Ew. Unh.
不，不要！不要清理我的光环！
No. No, don't! Stop cleansing my aura.
不要管我的光环，好吗？
Just leave my aura alone, okay?
我会没事的，好吗？真的我希望她开心
I'll be fine. All right? Really. I hope she'll be very happy.
不，你并不希望是的，我不希望！
No, you don't. No, I don't.
叫她去死，是她离开了我！
To hell with her. She left me!
你从来都不知道她是女同性恋
And you never knew she was a lesbian.
不知道！行了吧！
No! Okay?
为什么每个人老是要提出来？
Why does everyone keep fixating on that?
她都不知道，我又怎么会知道？
She didn't know. How should I know?
有时候我希望我是女同性恋…
Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian.
我讲得很大声吗？
Did I say that out loud?
没事的，罗斯你现在感到很痛苦
All right, Ross. Look, you're feeling a lot of pain right now.
你很生气，很伤心
You're angry. You're hurting.
我能告诉你解决方法是什么吗？
Can I tell you what the answer is?
脱衣舞厅！
Strip joints!
别这样，你单身了！有需求的！
Come on, you're single. Have some hormones.
我不想单身，好吗？
See, but I don't want to be single, okay?
我只想…再次结婚！
I just wanna be married again.
而我只想要一百万美金！
And I just want a million dollars!
