101种骚扰同事的方法

101种骚扰同事的方法Leave a stack of old applications and a note saying, “Install these” 留一堆没用的旧软件和一张写着“安装这些”便条Staple your reports in the wrong corner用钉书钉订报告的时候订在错误的一角Put tape over the mouse optics在光学鼠标上粘上胶带Unplug a co-worker’s monitor拔掉某个同事的显示器接线Talk to sick employees while wearing a dust mask和生病的员工讲话时带上一个防尘面具Turn your earphones up all the way把你的耳机音量调到最大从早到晚带着耳机Burn popcorn in the microwave用微波炉爆（焦）爆米花“Forget” to put your tuna sandwich in the fridge“忘记”在冰箱里放上你的金枪鱼三明治Turn up the beep volume of the copier把复印机“哔”的音量放大Empty the paper out of the main printer/copier清空打印机/复印机的纸Empty the ink or toner out of the main printer/copier倒空打印机/复印机的墨或炭粉Practice beat boxing练习节奏口技（拳击）（参考attaboy ,Angelo 的评论）Sing show tunes唱舞台音乐剧Hang u p the phone before they say, “good bye”在对方说再见之前挂断电话Slurp hot coffee during meetings开会的时候出声地啜热咖啡Walk around the office barefooted光脚在办公室里四处走Empty out a co-workers office on a Friday afternoon星期五下午把某个员工的办公室清空Misplace peoples pens把人们的笔放错地方Insert a 3.5″disk before they turn on their computer在他们打开电脑之前插进一张软盘Glue their mouse to the desk把他们的鼠标粘在桌子上Leave an open can of tuna in their desk在他们桌上放一只开了封的金枪鱼罐头Make a screenshot of their desktop and use it as their screensaver把他们的电脑桌面截成一张图，然后把这张图设成屏保Turn up the contrast on their monitor把他们显示器的对比度调高Talk in a funny accent用可笑的口音说话Use goofy event sounds for your programs给你的电脑程序选用滑稽的事件提示音Chant, “Yeay, I got mail!!” every time you get a new email每次收到新邮件的时候高唱“yeay,我收到了邮件”Print out a phony pink slip and leave It in their mailbox打印一张假解聘通知书放到他们的信箱里Send flowers from one co-worker to another借某同事之名送花给另一同事Start your car remotely when someone walk by it有人经过的你的车时，用遥控器（远远的就）把你的车发动起来Insist on people to have a great morning坚决要求人们应该有一个美好的早晨Leave hole punches all over随处乱放打孔器Leave your lunch garbage in other people’s cans把你午餐过后的垃圾放进别人的罐头After each sip give a refreshing, “Ahhh”每啜一口都来一句惬意的“啊……”Put salt on someone’s mouse pad在别人的鼠标垫上撒盐Set a password on someone’s screens aver给别人的屏保设置密码Carry on a conversation with someone two cubes down坚持和两个隔间之外的人对话Smirk when a co-worker walks by在一个同事经过的时候傻笑Eat half of someone’s lunch把别人的午餐吃掉一半Swap co-worker’s chairs调换同事的椅子Fake stomach flu during a meeting and need to abruptly leave three or four times 开会的时候假装急性肠胃炎，突然地离开三四次Stare deeply into your co-workers eyes when they talk to you当同事和你讲话的时候死死盯住他们的眼睛Take all the ice out of the community freezer把公用冷藏机里的冰都拿出来Listen to comedy tracks and laugh hysterically听搞笑段子并歇斯底里的大笑Hit all the floor buttons when you leave the elevator离开电梯之前把所有楼层的按钮都按一遍Make hissing sounds into the phone and insist you have a bad connection 对着电话发出咝咝的声音，说是信号不好Flip the left and right mouse button defaults把默认的鼠标左右键倒装过来Take out the ball in the mouse取出鼠标里的滚珠Eat sunflower seeds吃瓜子Tell a long story without a point讲一个冗长且毫无主题的故事Tell a co-worker you liked their hair better last week告诉一个同事你更喜欢他们上一周时的头发Anonymously send flowers to a random co-worker匿名送花给随便哪一位同事Bring Cheetos for food days在食物交流日上带来的是Cheetos牌的零食Drag your feet when you walk down the halls拖着脚走过大厅Exclaim your co-worker didn’t wash his hands when leaving the restroom 惊叫你的同事出洗手间时没洗手Eat stinky foods when you have lunch at your desk午饭时在你的桌上吃些臭烘烘的食物Practice drumming on your desk在桌子上练习敲鼓Use too many paper clips用超多回形针Fill out your time sheets incorrectly填错你的工作时间表Set your mobile phone to an obnoxious ring tone给你的手机设一个烦人的铃声Forward chain letters and other spam to co-workers给同事转发连锁信和别的垃圾邮件Express your political views at length长篇大论你的政治观点Whisper loudly大声讲悄悄话（吹口哨）Come to work sick生病也来上班Drink the last cup of coffee without making a new pot喝掉最后一杯咖啡，且不添一壶新的Answer your mobile during meetings开会的时候接电话Stand over someone while they are on the phone别人接电话的时候站在旁边监听Sneak up behind someone从后面突然吓别人Mess with the thermostat乱按一番调温器Give everyone a pistol wink when they walk by冲每个经过的人作手枪射击状Gradually turn down the volume on someone’s phone 把某人电话音量逐渐调低Leave unusual print outs on the printer在打印机旁留几张内容诡异的打印件Throw out other people’s prints把别人的打印件扔掉Juggle office supplies用办公用品耍杂技Write all your memos on bright colored paper把你所有的备忘录写在颜色刺眼的纸上Be overly nice to people对人过分的亲热Hide whiteboard erasers藏起白板擦Chew gum whie talking on the phone讲电话时嚼口香糖Regularly update everyone on the current weather定时给每个人汇报当前天气Read your emails aloud大声读你的emailLeave the fridge open不关冰箱门Shake up cans of pop in the fridge把冰箱里的汽水瓶摇一遍Leave fingerprints on the copier glass在复印机（打印机的）玻璃上留下指印Whistle all day long从早到晚吹口哨Wear too much cologne/perfume撒过多的香水Type loudly很响地敲键盘Wear bright colored clothes穿颜色刺眼的衣服Give everyone a nickname from a TV show拿电视剧里的名字给每个人起外号Do the sneaky walk around the office在办公室里鬼鬼祟祟的走Peer over the cube and wait for a co-worker to look up and notice向别的隔断张望，等着有人抬起头来注意到Use the intercom and page yourself擅自使用内部电话呼叫自己和记录Swap the regular and decaf coffee对换普通咖啡和脱咖啡因（无糖）咖啡Hide the sugar and creamer把咖啡里加的糖和奶藏起来Type emails in uppercase and excessive punctuation用大写字母写email，并且用n多标点Refer to your garbage can as your in-box称你的垃圾桶为收件箱Stick pencils to the ceiling in other people’s offices在别人办公室天花板上戳（粘）铅笔Throw a bouncy ball in your office在办公室里扔弹力球Tell the same story over and over一个故事翻来覆去的讲Imitate regular sounds like a disc drive opening, door slamming or a mouse click模仿诸如打开光驱，关门，或者点击鼠标的声音Talk to your monitor as if it was a person把你的显示器当成人一样对其讲话Schedule meetings at 4:00pm把会议的时间定在下午4点Talk loudly with your earphones on when someone comes to talk to you有人过来和你交谈的时候，戴着耳机大声说话。