幽默英语小故事欣赏.doc
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英语幽默小故事〔共8篇〕篇1:英语幽默小故事 Don't Pick Up the Money on the GroundAn economist professor and a student are walking down the street when they see a $20 bill lying on the sidewalk in front of them. The student goes to pick up the money but his professor stops him and tells him not to bother.Why not?If it were a real twenty-dollar bill, someone would have picked it up already.Everything that can be invented has been invented.别捡地上的钱一位经济学教授和一名学生正在大街上行走,这时他们看到前面的人行道上躺着一张20美元面值的钞票。
学生走过去准备捡,教授制止了他,告诉他别自寻烦恼。
“为什么不捡?”“假设那是一张真20美元钞票的话,早就有人捡走了。
”“该创造的都已经被创造出来了。
”篇2:英语幽默小故事 The Less You Know, the More Money You MakeTheorem: Engineers and scientists will never make as much money as business executives.Now a rigorous mathematical proof that explains why this is true:Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.Postulate 2: Time is Money.As every engineer knows, Power=Work/Time. Since Knowledge=Power, and Time=Money, we haveKnowledge=Work/Money. Solving for Money, we get: Money=Work/Knowledge.Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity regardless of the Work done.Conclusion: The less you know, the more money you make.知识越少挣钱越多定理:工程师和科学家永远应当比经济专家挣钱少。
幽默英语故事"A Hilarious English Story"Once upon a time, I had a really funny experience at my English class. There was this new teacher, Mr. Thompson, who was super enthusiastic about teaching us English. He had this big bushy mustache that wiggled whenever he talked, and his glasses were always sliding down his nose.One day, we were learning about idioms. Mr. Thompson was trying to explain the idiom "raining cats and dogs". He said, "Now, kids, 'raining cats and dogs' doesn't mean that actual cats and dogs are falling from the sky. It just means it's raining really hard." But my friend Jack, who was always a bit of a joker, raised his hand and said, "Sir, if it rained cats and dogs, would they land on their feet like normal?" Mr. Thompson looked at him for a moment, pushed his glasses back up his nose, and then said, "Well, Jack, I suppose if they were falling from the sky, they'd be so confused they might forget how to land on their feet."Then there was this girl, Lucy. She was really shy and hardly ever spoke in class. But that day, she seemed to be in a particularly good mood. When Mr. Thompson asked if anyone could make a sentence using the idiom, Lucy raised her hand. We were all really surprised. She said, "Yesterday, when I left the movie theater, it was raining cats and dogs, so I ran home as fast as I could." Mr. Thompson beamed at her and said, "Excellent, Lucy! See, everyone, that's how you use it."But then things got even funnier. Mr. Thompson wanted to do an exercise where we had to act out idioms. He called up a couple of students, including me. He told us to act out "a piece of cake". So I just pretended to easily pick up an invisible piece of cake and eat it. Another student, Tom, who was a bit clumsy, tripped over his own feet while trying to show how easy it was. Mr. Thompson laughed and said, "Well, Tom, for you it seems like 'a piece of cake' is a bit more difficult."At the end of the class, Mr. Thompson told us a joke. He said, "Why is the English language so crazy? Because it's not French!" We all laughed. That English class was one of the most hilarious and memorable ones. And from that day on, I always looked forward to Mr. Thompson's classes, just to see what kind of funny things would happen next.中文翻译从前啊,我在英语课上有一次特别搞笑的经历。
英语幽默小故事故事1:The Mischievous ParrotOne day, a man named John went to a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shopkeeper showed him a beautiful parrot, which could speak many languages. Impressed, John decided to take it home.However, as soon as John reached home, he realized that the parrot was quite mischievous. It would imitate John's voice and play pranks on him. The parrot would hide his keys, steal his wallet, and even mimic his wife's voice to confuse him.Despite the trouble, John found the parrot's antics amusing and couldn't help but laugh. He decided to name the parrot Charlie, as it perfectly suited its cheeky personality.One day, John's friend came to visit. Charlie, being the clever parrot he was, decided to have some fun. As John and his friend sat down to chat, Charlie imitated their voices and pretended to have a conversation, switching back and forth between their voices flawlessly. John's friend was astonishedand couldn't figure out how both of them were speaking at the same time.Soon, Charlie realized that his prank had gone too far. He feared that John's friend would get upset or angry, so he quickly revealed his trick by saying, \。
幽默的英文小故事幽默的英文小故事(通用9篇)是不是总觉得学英语看阅读很烦躁?那是没有找到打开英语阅读的正确方式,下面,这些幽默的英文小故事,估计会让你爱上英文阅读。
幽默的英文小故事篇1As the years turn生日来临之际For her 82nd birthday,I surprised my grandmother with a birthday greeting signed by the President. (Upon request,this service is available to seniors over 80.)When I asked grandma how she felt receiving a card from the White House,she had a ready answer. "There's no privacy in this country any more,"she said. "They even keep track of your birthday. "我奶奶过82岁的生日时,我送给她一份惊奇的礼物—一张由总统签名的生日贺卡。
(根据规定,80岁以上的老年人可得到此项服务。
)当我问奶奶收到来自白宫的贺卡有何感想时,她毫不犹豫地回答说:“在这个国家,再也没有隐私了,他们就连你的生日都追踪着。
”幽默的英文小故事篇2Peer pressure同辈的压力My teen-age son,Chad,and nine of his friends came home one night with newly pierced ears. When his grandmother heard about it,she asked him why he did it.”Peerpressure," Chad told her.一天晚上,我十几岁的儿子查理,带着九个朋友回到家,他们都扎了耳朵眼儿。
幽默英语小故事带翻译《The Bear and the Two Travelers》Two men were traveling together, when a huge bear suddenly appearedon their pathOne of the men, seeing the danger, quickly climbed up a tree and hid himself among the branches The other man, who was not so quick or agile, had no time to climb a tree So, he threw himself flat on the ground and pretended to be deadThe bear came up to the man lying on the ground It sniffed at his ears, and nudged him with its nose But the man held his breath and lay perfectly still The bear thought he was dead and walked awayWhen the bear had gone, the man in the tree climbed down He asked the man on the ground, "What did the bear say to you when it put its mouth close to your ear?"The other man replied, "The bear said, 'Never travel with a friendwho deserts you at the first sign of danger'"翻译:《熊和两个旅行者》两个男人一起旅行,突然一只巨大的熊出现在他们的路上。
英文幽默小故事Once upon a time, there was a man who loved to tell jokes. He was known far and wide for his sense of humor and his ability to make people laugh. One day, he decided to write a book of English humorous stories to share his wit and wisdom with the world.The first story in his book was about a man who went to the doctor because he was feeling unwell. The doctor examined him and said, "I'm sorry to tell you this, but you have a rare and incurable disease. You only have six months to live." The man was shocked and asked the doctor what he should do. The doctor replied, "Marry an accountant." The man was puzzled and asked, "Will that make me live longer?" The doctor said, "No, but it will feel like the longest six months of your life."The second story was about a man who went to a restaurant and ordered a steak. When the waiter brought it to his table, the man noticed that it was very small. He called the waiter over and said, "Excuse me, but this steak is rather small." The waiter replied, "Yes, sir. It's the perfect size for a small appetite." The man said, "But I have a big appetite!" The waiter smiled and said, "Then it's the perfect size for a big appetite as well, sir."The third story was about a man who was walking down the street when he saw a sign outside a store that said, "We sell everything for $1!" He couldn't believe it and went inside to see for himself. Sure enough, everything in the store was priced at $1. He picked up a shirt, a pair of socks, and a hat, and went to the counter to pay. The cashier said, "That will be $3, please." The man was confused and asked, "But the sign outside says everything is $1." The cashier replied, "Yes, sir. The sign is $1."The man continued to write more and more humorous stories, each one more clever and entertaining than the last. His book became a bestseller, and he was invited to speak at comedy clubs and literary events all over the world. People couldn't get enough of his funny and lighthearted tales.In the end, the man realized that laughter truly is the best medicine, and he was grateful for the opportunity to bring joy and amusement to so many people. He continued to write and tell jokes, spreading laughter wherever he went.And so, the man's book of English humorous stories became a classic, cherished by readers of all ages. It was a testament to the power of humor and the joy of sharing laughter with others. After all, as the man always said, "A day without laughter is a day wasted."。
幽默英语小故事16篇笑死人的在小学英语教学期间,英语小故事能够为学生的学习提供良好的背景。
幽默英语小故事有哪些呢?本文是店铺整理的幽默英语小故事16篇,欢迎阅读。
幽默英语小故事1.Be Careful What You Wish ForA couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand.Next, it was the husband‘s turn. He paused for a moment, then said shyly, "Well, I‘d like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.慎重许愿一对结婚25周年的夫妻在庆祝他们六十岁的生日。
他们恰好在同一天出生。
庆祝活动中,一位仙女出现了。
她说,由于他们是已经结婚25年的恩爱夫妻,因此她给许给这对夫妻每个人一个愿望。
妻子想周游世界。
仙女招了招手。
“呯!”的一声,她的手中出现了一张票。
接下来该丈夫许愿了。
Ten CandiesMother asks her son, “Jim, if you have ten candies, and you eat four, then how many candles do you have?”“Ten.” Jim says.“Then,” Mother asks.“Yes, Mum. Four candles are in my stomach and six candies are out of my stomach. Four and six i s ten, isn’t it right?”故事2 十块糖妈妈问儿子:“吉姆,如果你有10块糖,吃了4块,那你还有几块糖?”“10块。
”吉姆说。
“10块?”妈妈问。
“是的,妈妈。
因为4块在我的肚子里面,6块在肚子外面,4加6等于10,不对吗?”小学生英语故事包括:幽默故事(1-7页)、普通小故事(7-40页)。
激发小朋友们学英语的兴趣,帮助他们提高成绩。
最好每天背一篇,会有不错的效果的O(∩_∩)O英文幽默故事:There was a guy who went into a shop to buy a parrot. There werethree parrots in the shop. One was $5,000; another one, $10,000; and the third one, $30,000. The customer asked the owner, “How come this guy is $5,000? That’s so expensive for this kindof parrot.” The owner said, “Because I have trained him and he can talk.” So the customer asked him, “How about this guy? What can he do that makes him so expensive?” The owner said, “Well, apart from talking, he can also do some amusing actions,like dancing and so on. That’s why he’s so expensive.” Then the customer said, “How about the third one? What canhe do that makes him so expensive?” The owner of the shopsaid, “I don’t know. Normally, I have never heard him talk, nor dance, nor whistle, nor sing, nothing at all! But the other two call h im ‘The Boss.’”老板最大有个人到一间商店买鹦鹉。
英语幽默小故事10篇【引言】学习英语的过程中,阅读幽默小故事不仅能够提高我们的语言能力,还能让我们在轻松愉快的氛围中领略到英语文化的魅力。
下面,就让我们一起来欣赏10篇英语幽默小故事,并在快乐中学习吧!【故事1】Once upon a time, there was a man named Jack who had a peculiar habit of always forgetting his keys.One day, he locked himself out of his house again.Instead of calling a locksmith, he decided to break into his own house through the window.As he was climbing in, he suddenly realized that he had left his keys inside the house!幽默点:Jack忘记带钥匙的习惯以及他试图通过窗户进入自己家的荒谬行为让人捧腹大笑。
【故事2】Mike was a terrible cook.One day, he decided to make dinner for his girlfriend.He spent hours in the kitchen, and when he finally served the meal, it was completely inedible.His girlfriend asked him, "What did you make?" Mike replied, "Well, it"s not quite soup, and it"s not quite stew, but you can call it "soupstew"!"幽默点:Mike的创新菜名“soupstew”让人忍俊不禁,体现了他的幽默感。
英语幽默小故事在我们的生活中,幽默就像一颗闪闪发光的星星,能在平凡的日子里带来无尽的欢乐和惊喜。
而英语幽默小故事,更是以其独特的魅力,跨越语言的障碍,让我们捧腹大笑的同时,也能感受到英语的奇妙之处。
有这样一个有趣的故事。
一位先生去餐厅吃饭,他点了一份牛排。
当牛排端上来的时候,他发现牛排比他想象中的要小很多。
于是,他生气地对服务员说:“This steak is too small! It's not what I expected at all!”(这块牛排太小了!完全不是我所期望的!)服务员很淡定地回答:“Sir, this is a very special kind of steak It shrinks when it sees a customer”(先生,这是一种非常特别的牛排。
它一看到顾客就会缩水。
)这位先生听到这样的回答,先是一愣,然后忍不住笑了起来,气也消了大半。
还有一个故事也很有意思。
一位英语老师在课堂上提问:“If I give you two rabbits and then give you another two rabbits, how many rabbits do you have?”(如果我给你两只兔子,然后再给你两只兔子,你有几只兔子?)一个学生很快回答:“Six”(六只。
)老师很惊讶,问道:“Why?”(为什么?)学生自信地说:“Because I already have two rabbits at home”(因为我家里已经有两只兔子了。
)全班同学都被他的回答逗得哈哈大笑。
再来讲一个。
有一天,汤姆在街上遇到了他的朋友杰克。
杰克看起来很伤心,汤姆就问:“What's wrong with you, Jack?”(你怎么了,杰克?)杰克叹了口气说:“I lost my wallet It had all my money and my ID card”(我丢了我的钱包。
1. A secondA man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says: "In a second"一秒钟一男子进入教堂和上帝对话。
他问:"主啊,一百万美元对你意味着多少?""一便士"上帝回答,男子又问:"那一百万年呢?"上帝说:"一秒钟"。
最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"上帝回答:"过一秒钟"2.Cat and MiceMrs. Brown went to visit one of her friend and carried a small box with holes punched in the top." What's in your box?" asked the friend."A cat," answered Mrs. Brown. "You see I've been dreaming about mice at night and I'm so scared! This cat is to catch them.""But the mice are only imaginary," said the friend."So is the cat," whispered Mrs. Brown.猫和老鼠布朗夫人去拜访一位朋友,她拿着一个顶部扎满了小眼儿的盒子。
英文幽默故事I went to the zoo the other day. There was a big sign in front of the camel enclosure that said "Camel rides, $5." So I thought, why not? I paid the guy and he said, "Okay, but remember, this is a one hump camel." I was like, "What do you mean? Are there two hump camels for rides too?" He just looked at me and said, "No, I just don't want you to complain later that you were expecting two humps and only got one."My friend is really bad at cooking. One time, she tried to make a cake. She followed the recipe step by step, or at least she thought she did. When the cake came out of the oven, it looked more like a pancake. She was so confused. She said, "I don't understand. I put in all the right ingredients. I even set the timer correctly." I took a look at the "cake" and said, "Well, did you use baking powder?" She paused for a second and then said, "What's baking powder?"I was at a restaurant once. The waiter came to take my order. I said, "I'll have the steak, medium rare, with a side of fries." He wrote it down and then asked, "And what would you like to drink?" I said, "Just a glass of water, please." He nodded and then said, "Would you like ice in your water?" I said, "Sure." He then asked, "Cubed ice or crushed ice?" I was a bit surprised and said, "Uh, cubed ice is fine." He smiled and said, "Good choice. Cubed ice is less likely to water down your drink too quickly."I have a neighbor who is always trying to save money. One day, he saw an ad for a free sample of a new brand of coffee. He went to the store to get it. When he came back, he was really excited. He said, "Look at this! Free coffee!"I said, "That's great." Then he made a cup of the coffee. After taking one sip, he spit it out and said, "Ugh, this tastes horrible. I should have known that free stuff is not always good." But the next day, he was back at the store trying to get another free sample of something else.There was a magician at a party I went to. He was doing all these amazing tricks. He made a rabbit appear out of a hat, and then he made a card disappear and reappear in someone's pocket. Everyone was really impressed. Then he asked for a volunteer from the audience. I volunteered. He told me to stand in the middle of the room. He waved his wand and said, "Now, I'm going to make you disappear." I waited for a few seconds and then said, "Well, I'm still here." He looked a bit embarrassed and said, "Oh, sorry. My magic seems to be on a break today."。
幽默英语小故事欣赏
幽默英语小故事篇一
During the doctor s periodic visit to my elderly mother, I told him that Mother would be celebrating her 98th birthday in few days. Delighted by the news, he bent down and gave her a kiss for the occasion. He then announced that he, too, would be celebrating a birthday in few days and asked for a kiss in return. When he left, my mother shook her head in disgust. Can you imagine, she said. Seventy dollars and I had to kiss him too!
医生按期来探视我的老母。
我告诉他母亲不几天就要庆祝她98岁的生日了。
医生听了也很高兴,为此,他弯下腰来亲了她一下。
然后他说不几天他也要庆祝自己的生日,并要求她还他一个吻。
医生走后,我母亲厌恶地摇摇头。
你能想象吗,她说,付了他70元,我还得亲他!
幽默英语小故事篇二
After friends of mine landed at busy Newwark Airport, they were unable to attract the attentionof any porters to help with their luggage. In desperation, the husband took out a five-dollar billand waved it above the crowd. In an instant, a skycap was at his side. Sir, observed theporter, you certainly have excellent communication skills.
我的朋友们在繁忙的纽瓦克机场着陆后,他们却不能招呼到脚夫来帮他们搬行李。
无奈,丈夫拿出一张五美元的钞票在人群上面摇晃。
一个带宽边帽的人马上来到他身边。
先生,脚夫说道,很明显你有绝妙的交际技巧。
幽默英语小故事篇三
The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find hisapartment, he said, Come up to the fifth floor and ring the doorbell with your elbow. Whenthe door open, push with your foot.
一个声名狼藉的小气鬼终于决定要请一次客了。
他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说:你上到五楼,用你的胳膊肘按门铃。
门开了后,再用你的脚把门推开。
Why use my elbow and foot?
为什么我要用我的肘和脚呢?
Well, gosh, was the reply, You re not coming empty-handed, are you?
天哪! 吝啬鬼回答,你总不会空着手来吧?
幽默英语小故事篇四
After his beloved horse died, a man wanted to place an ad in the newspaper like this: Horse saddle and bridle for $50.Inadvertently(非故意地) the paper added a comma to the ad, which read instead: Horse, saddle and bridle for $50.Immediately someone responded to the ad, That s an awfully cheap price for a horse, said the caller, What s wrong with your horse?Well, he is dead, replied the man who placed the erroneously(错误地) typed ad.
一个人衷爱的马死了,他打算在报上登则广告如下:50元卖马鞍和马缰绳。
无意中报纸在广告语中加了个逗号,读起来成这样了,50元卖马,马鞍和马缰绳。
马上就有人询问这则广告,这马的价格真是太便宜了,询问者说,马有什么毛病吗?哦,它是死的,安排这条误入的广告的人回答道。