摩登家庭 -第2季第8集-字幕-对白-纯英文-看美剧学英语-打印-word版

1--Let's go, buddy. Schooltime.走吧伙计该上学了2--Oh, and Gloria, if you want to get together with the girls later,歌洛莉亚如果你待会和你闺蜜有约3--I could just, you know, watch the football game or something.我可以自己看看橄榄球赛什么的4--That means he wants to watch a football game.其实他就是想看橄榄球赛5--I'm not talking to you.我不是和你说话6--What are you drinking coffee for anyway?你为什么要喝咖啡7--It's my culture. I'm Colombian.这是我的文化习俗我是哥伦比亚人8--Oh, yeah? What part of Colombia是吗这些法式吐司9--are those French toaster sticks from?也是哥伦比亚的吗10--Babe, I'm not sure about the game.亲爱的我不太确定你今天能看比赛11--The whole family's coming over for the barbecue.因为全家人都要过来烧烤12--- That's today? - See.-是今天吗-没错13--It's the Ohio State game.今天可是俄亥俄州赛14--So? Everybody can watch.那又怎样每个人都能看15--I don't like watching the game with people who don't know the game.我不喜欢和不懂球的人一起看比赛16--People talk.七嘴八舌乱指点17--You talk at my football games.你也会乱指点我的橄榄球比赛18--For one thing, it's called soccer.首先你那个是足球19--Your team scored two goals all season.而且你们队整个赛季只得了两分20--I'm not taking a big risk.我随便说也不会冒风险21--How much of this did you drink?你到底喝了多少啊22--Give me a break. I have to climb a rope today.饶了我吧我今天得去攀绳呢23--- Hey, Mom. - Yeah?-妈妈-怎么了24--Can I have $40 for lunch?能给我40块钱吃午饭吗25--Forty dollars?40块26--- I also need a book for school. - What book?-学校还让我们买本书-什么书27--I want a dress.我想买条裙子28--Do you have any idea what a bad liar you are?你知道你撒谎撒得多失败吗29--I'd be more worried that我更担心的是30--she couldn't come up with a single book title.她连一本书的名字都想不出来31--Luke, come on. We're late.卢克快点我们要迟到了32--Mmm, there's a first- inside out and backwards.这是第一次里外前后全都穿反了33--At least it isn't zipped into his...至少他没把衣服塞进...34--Oh. There it is.好吧真塞进去了35--Well, there's book smart, and then there's street smart.有人是"读书大智慧" 也有人是"市井小聪明"36--Yeah, and then there's Luke.没错卢克属于第三类怪胎37--Oh, he's just... He's just curious. That's all.他只是他只是好奇心重仅此而已38--He's got this almost scientific mind...他有着科学家的头脑39--with a thirst for knowledge.以及对知识的渴望40--He's like this little Einstein.他像小爱因斯坦一样41--Some people ask, "Why?"有些人会问"为什么"42--Luke asks, "Why not?"但卢克会问"为什么不呢"43--I ask "Why?" a lot.我经常问"为什么"44--We're at the ten. We're at the five.我们在十码区现在是五码区45--We're at the one. Daddy, we're scoring a touchdown!到达一码爸爸我们触地得分啦46--No, please... please don't spike our baby.别小心别弄伤孩子了47--Why is she dressed like the Hamburglar?为什么她穿得像汉堡神偷公仔48--She's a referee.她是裁判49--Do... Do we even have to go to my dad's tonight?我们今晚一定要去我爸那里吗50--Are you kidding me? We're playing Ohio State.你在开玩笑吗今晚是俄亥俄州赛51--I collect antique fountain pens.我收集古董钢笔52--I'm quite adept at Japanese flower arrangement-我很擅长日式插花技术53--ikebana-花道54--and I was a starting offensive lineman at the University of Illinois.而且我曾是伊利诺伊大学的首发进攻内锋55--Surprise.惊讶吧56--- I don't like football. - You know what?-我不喜欢橄榄球-你知道吗57--I thought part of being in a relationship...我认为维持恋情的一方面58--was pretending to enjoy your partner's interests.就是要爱屋及乌59--Do you think I really loved home pickle-making?你以为我真的喜欢做腌菜吗60--Yeah, 'cause you did.是的因为你确实喜欢61--For a week, 就喜欢一周62--until we became the weird guys who gave everybody pickles.到后来别人都以为我们是到处送腌菜的怪胎63--Oh, thank you, Marvin, for inviting us into your lovely home.马文谢谢邀请我们到你温馨的家来64--Here. Would you care for a sack of pickles?给你请收下这包腌菜65--It was charming.你真可爱66--We were picklers, Mitchell.我们是腌菜工米奇尔67--Okay, you know what? Fine.好吧那就算了68--Stay home with your little jagged scissors.和你的小剪刀待在家里吧69--Maybe catch up on your scrapbooking.你可以继续弄你的剪贴簿70--Come... You loved scrapbooking.拜托你也喜欢剪贴簿啊71--Did I, Mitchell? Did I?我有吗米奇尔我有吗72--Stop. Don't do the "Double question to prove a point" thing.够了别以为搞个双重反问就是真的了73--I hate it when people do that.我讨厌别人那么做74--Do you, Mitchell? Do you?是吗米奇尔是吗75--Stop, Lily.别闹了莉莉76--No problem. We'll be right down. Thanks.没问题我们马上过来谢谢77--Hey, honey. What's up?亲爱的怎么了78--The school just called. Luke got in a fight.学校刚刚来电话了卢克打架了79--Oh, geez. Is he okay?天呐他还好吗80--Yeah, he's fine, but they want us to come down there.他没事但老师想要我们去一趟81--- Where are you? - I'm showing a house.-你在哪里-我在带人看房子82--What house?什么房子83--I'm golfing.我在打高尔夫球84--I bet it was that Durkas kid.我猜是那个叫德卡斯的小孩85--I hate that kid.我讨厌那个小孩86--He probably jumped on Luke也许是他突然挑衅卢克87--and Luke just fought back.而卢克只是反抗而已88--- Kid's a menace. - He made fun of my hair once.-那小孩真讨厌-他曾经取笑我的头发89--Shh. The parents are probably in there.嘘他的家长可能在里面90--I slept on it funny.我只是睡觉把头发睡乱了91--Like that never happened to him?就好像他没有过一样92--Come on.走吧93--What are you doing here?你们在这里干嘛94--These two knuckleheads were fighting each other.这两个笨蛋在一起打架95--- What? - Could've been worse.-什么-幸好是你啊96--I was not ready to face Durkas today.我还没准备好今天面对德卡斯97--So what happened?发生什么事了98--Well, apparently there was some name-calling很明显在操场上发生了骂人99--and shoving on the playground.和斗殴的事情100--By the time a teacher separated them,老师把他们分开的时候101--Luke was sitting on Manny's chest.卢克正坐在曼尼的胸上102--- Luke, that's not like you. - Wait a minute.-卢克那可不像你啊-等等103--- You're Luke's father? - Grandfather.-你是卢克的爸爸吗-外公104--- So Manny's father is... - Javier.-那么曼尼的爸爸是-哈维尔105--Crazy guy. That's where he gets his fire.一个疯子就是从他身上遗传到的暴脾气106--- Okay, you're... - He's our son.-好吧你是-他是我们的儿子107--- And my grandson. - I'm his daughter.-我的外孙-我是他女儿108--- So you're... - His uncle.-那么你是-他小舅舅109--Stop saying that or I'll sit on your chest again.你要再敢这么说我还会坐到你的胸上110--Ho! Wait a second. Is that what this was all about?等一下打架就是因为这个吗111--He keeps calling me his nephew.他一直说我是他的外甥112--You are my nephew.你就是我的外甥113--- Shut up! - Okay, okay.-闭嘴-好了好了114--I'm getting the sense that you're all related, uh, somehow.我明白了你们似乎是一家人115--So it's probably best if you work this out at home...所以也许你们最好能回家自己解决116--so the boys can go back to class, okay?这样孩子们就能回去上课了好吗117--But we're not happy about this, boys.但是我们很生气你们这样小伙子们118--This is not how mature young men behave.这不是成熟的年轻小伙的行为119--Here's your note for Miss Passwater.把这便条给"帕斯沃"老师120--Look, I wouldn't worry. They're good kids.我并不担心他们都是好孩子121--It's just tough when one kid's a little different.只是当某个孩子比较怪异时会有点难处理122--- Yes. - Yes.-是的-是的123--You heard how she said that, right?你听到她那么说了对吗124--Yes.是的125--She thought Luke was the weird one. Luke.她觉得卢克是怪异的那个卢克126--Her kid gets his head stuck in the furniture,她家孩子把自己的头卡在家具里127--and Manny is the different one.还好意思说曼尼怪异128--I will tell you what's weird.我来告诉你什么怪异129--Our son is not weird.我们的孩子并不怪异130--What's weird is that her kid wears aftershave怪异的是她的孩子抹须后水131--and dresses like a count.而且打扮得像个伯爵132--I think we should cancel with them for the barbecue.我想我们别请他们过来烧烤了133--If we cancel, it'll just make this a bigger deal than it is.如果我们不去只会把问题越闹越大134--It'll be good for Luke and Manny to spend some time.让卢克和曼尼多相处一下对他们两个都好135--- Might be good for You And Gloria too. - Why?-也许对你和歌洛莉亚也好-为什么136--She's always had a problem with me.她一直对我有意见137--I think I'm gonna find out what it is.我觉得我该找出是什么问题138--That's the worst thing you could do.那是你最不该做的139--Just sweep it under the rug.就当没发生过忍忍就过去了140--- I'm not a sweeper. - Trust me on this.-我可不是个"忍者" -听我的没错141--I think you two need to talk it out.我觉得你们俩得谈谈这件事142--I don't have anything to say to her.我跟她没什么好说的143--She's the one with the problem, not me.她才是有问题的那个不是我144--Whose side are you on?你到底向着谁145--She's my daughter. You're my wife.她是我的女儿你是我的妻子146--Let's remember what's important here.让我们先理清重点147--There's a football game on.橄榄球赛马上就开始了148--I just hate it when my two girls aren't getting along.我只是不想我的两个女孩相处得不好149--How exactly is she your girl?她怎么成你的女孩了150--I got a few things for the party.我为聚会准备了一点东西151--Is Lily ready to go?莉莉准备好要走了吗152--Oh, yeah, yeah. She's ready.是的她准备好了153--What's wrong?怎么了154--I'm just really worried about C.J. Hightower.我真的很担心C·J·海托155--With the bad ankle,他脚踝受伤了156--I don't know how he's gonna run his corner routes.我不知道他要怎么跑完三角线路157--What did my boyfriend just say?我男友刚刚说了什么呀158--Listen, I heard what you said, and I thought, yes,我听了你之前说的我同意你的话159--I should try to learn more about football.我应该多了解一下橄榄球160--That is very mature of you.你这么做真是成熟了161--I figure, if football fans can learn it,我觉得橄榄球迷都能学会162--how hard can it be?那能有多难呢163--That's very elitist of you.就你最聪明164--I'm taking baby steps here, all right?我才刚刚起步好不165--I'm actually- I'm really looking forward to it.其实我真的很期待166--'Cause it's not just the game.因为这不仅仅是比赛167--It's-It's the bands and the drama, the pageantry.而且现场彩旗招展锣鼓喧天168--Don't forget about the team mascots.别忘了还有球队的吉祥物169--They wear ascots?他们戴"宽领带"吗170--No. Mascots. With an "M."不是是"吉祥物" 有个"M"开头171--That could have been very embarrassing.要是在外人面前你就丢脸了172--Okay.好吧173--Am I straight?直吗174--I'm not sure what you are right now.我也不知道你是直男还是什么175--How ya doin'?你们好吗176--- Hey, Gramps. - Hi, beautiful.-外公好-小美女好177--Hi, Phil. Good to see ya.你好菲尔见到你真好178--Let me guess. Game's on?让我猜猜比赛开始了吗179--Just started.刚开始180--Hey. For you.送给你的181--It's nice to see you, Gloria.很高兴见到你歌洛莉亚182--Ah! Two times today.今天两次哦183--- Okay, Well... - Uh, Phil?-抱两次好啊-菲尔184--She means we've seen them two times today.她的意思是我们今天见了两次185--Okay, everybody, the food's in there. The drinks are in there.大家听着吃的在那边喝的在那边186--- I'll be in here. - Hold on, Jay.-我进屋去了-等等杰187--I think we should address the elephant in the room.我觉得我们不该忽视明显存在的一个问题188--Uh, Luke, Manny. Bring it in.卢克曼尼都过来189--Come on. Huddle up.快点聚在一起190--Football.像打橄榄球一样191--Now in light of what happened at school today,鉴于今天在学校里发生的事情192--do you have any feelings you'd like to express?你们有什么想说的吗193--I think this is the proper forum...我觉得现在是个合适的表达机会194--For god's sakes. All right, both of you.老天啊得了吧你们两个195--Now, in this family, do we kick and punch each other,在这个家里我们是欺负彼此196--or do we love each other?还是关爱彼此197--Love each other. That's right.关爱彼此这就对了198--I'II be in the den.我进屋去了199--So, I brought dessert.我带了些甜点200--Okay. Thank you.好的谢谢你201--I make pie too.我也做了派202--You can never have too many pies, right?派再多也不嫌多对吧203--Okay, whoa. Whoa.行了204--Everybody take a deep breath.大家深呼吸205--Let's think about getting real.我们面对现实吧206--Phil, no.菲尔别这样207--Why "Phil, no"?为什么说"菲尔别这样"208--What is Phil doing?菲尔要干嘛209--I'm just gonna say it.我只是想说出来210--There's tension between you two.你们俩之间的紧张气氛211--Bam. It's out there. 已经弥漫出来了212--I'm gonna kill you.我要宰了你213--I think he's right, and I think we should talk about it.我想他是对的而且我们应该谈谈214--That's what I'm talkin' about...我就是想说这个215--you two talking... about it.你们谈谈这个事儿216--I like football.我喜欢橄榄球217--Haley hates it, which is weird海莉很讨厌这很奇怪218--because it's all boys... and there's no reading required.因为里面全是男孩也不必看书219--Do you know that she spends你知道吗她每天早上220--at least 45 minutes every morning doing her hair?至少花45分钟弄她的头发221--And then sometimes...而且有的时候222--Let's go, Illini!冲啊伊利诺伊队223--Let's go! Right now!冲啊快冲224--Looks like I gotta watch the game with Dick Butkus.看来我要和迪克·布特库斯一起看比赛了225--Dad! Dad, come on. That's offensive.老爸别这样太冒犯人了226--Mitchell, he's one of the greatest linebackers米奇尔那人是伊利诺斯州227--to ever play at Illinois...最棒的中后卫球员之一228--and one of my personal heroes.也是我自己的偶像之一229--And his name is "Butt-kiss"?难道他的名字真是"亲屁股"吗230--We're just choosing to...我们只是想要231--Okay. All right.好吧没什么232--Dad, I thought you were being homophobic. I'm sorry.老爸我以为你恐同呢抱歉233--- We got All night. - Yes, We do.-我们有一整晚要相处呢-好吧234--- are You joining us here? - Yeah.-你要和我们一起看吗-是的235--Jay, you know what? He's been studying up.杰你知道吗他正在钻研呢236--I gotta tell ya, I'm a little worried about C.J. Hightower.跟你说我有点担心C·J·海托237--Right? With the bad ankle?没错吧他脚踝受伤了238--I'm wondering how he's gonna run his corner routes.我很好奇他怎么能完成三角线路239--- Hightower's out. - What?-海托不上场-什么240--Oh. Then who is gonna run the corner routes?那谁来跑三角线路241--I'll tell you who it won't be- Billings.我来告诉你谁不会上吧比林斯242--That's low. He's in jail.太明显了他在坐牢243--Oh, wow. Yeah. Then no.是啊他不会上244--Double tight end,双侧边锋245--it's gonna be a quarterback roll-out to the left.四分卫要冲到左边了246--- They're gonna run it. - No, trust me.-他们要成功了-不可能相信我247--He's got the slot.他抢到位置了248--In the end zone! Touchdown!到达阵区了触地得分249--Lucky call. Maybe they, uh, should've considered blitzing.真幸运也许他们该考虑下闪电战250--Blitzing wouldn't have helped them. Get outta here.闪电战没用的一边儿凉快去吧251--Oh, gosh. Blitzing.天呐闪电战252--So, my interest in football ended as suddenly and dramatically...于是我对橄榄球的兴趣突然消失殆尽253--as the climax of West Side Story.就像《西区故事》在高潮时戛然而止254--I'm a musical theater fan.我是个音乐剧迷255--Surprise.惊讶吧256--Okay. The truth?好吧说实话吗257--I sometimes feel like you don't like me.有时候我觉得你不喜欢我258--Powerful, powerful stuff.开门见山重磅出击259--Claire? Tell us how that makes you feel.克莱尔告诉我们你怎么想260--Right now, I'm feeling a lot of anger.此时此刻我感到怒火中烧啊261--No, don't tell me. Tell her.别别跟我说跟她说262--Gloria, right now, I'm really angry at Phil.歌洛莉亚我现在很生菲尔的气263--Let's respect the process.别跑题了264--Gloria, I don't know歌洛莉亚我不知道265--why you think I don't like you.为什么你觉得我不喜欢你266--Sometimes when you see me, you make that face. 有时你在我面前会摆出那种表情267--What face?什么表情268--Like this. 就像这样269--- I do not make a face like that. - Oh, my God.-我才没做过那种表情呢-我的天啊270--- That is so Claire. - Mitchell!-那可是克莱尔的招牌表情-米奇尔271--See? She does that with everyone.看见没她对谁都那副表情272--It's just her face.已经习惯成自然了273--No, it's not just the face.不仅仅是那种表情274--From the beginning,从最开始到现在275--I feel like Manny and I are not welcome in this family.我觉得我和曼尼在这个家不受欢迎276--That is so crazy.这也太疯狂了吧277--No, it's not so crazy. It's how I feel.不一点都不疯狂是我的真实感受278--I am sorry if you feel that way.如果你那么想我很抱歉279--I really am, because from the moment I met you,真的很抱歉从我见到你的那一刻起280--I have tried to make you feel comfortable with us.我就想让你融入到我们当中来281--You think it's all in my head?你觉得这只是我自己胡思乱想282--No. Kind- I don't know.没有点我不知道283--I mean, we really love having you and Manny in our family.我是说我们很欢迎你和曼尼加入我们家284--- Really? - Really.-真的-真的285--So, you don't have to be so defensive.所以你用不着这么有戒心286--I do that, don't I?我是有戒心是吧287--Well, a bit.有一点吧288--I'm feeling a hug.我觉得应该拥抱了289--I was thinking group hug,我是想说三人群抱290--- But this is nice. - I'd be there if I could.-但这也不错-我要能去的话就去了291--Oh, my God. There's hugging.天啊这还有人搂搂抱抱呢292--Haley, get off the phone already.海莉不打电话会死啊293--Where did you go?你去哪了294--You heard him.你听见他说什么了295--He said, "Get outta here."他说"一边凉快去"296--Oh, my God. You're such a girl.天啊你真像个娇弱的小姑娘297--Dad- I was coming to get a beer anyways.爸反正我也想要喝杯啤酒的298--Nice apology. 你道歉真有诚意299--Nice beer.啤酒真不错300--Hey, there are the little roustabouts.嘿两个壮小伙来了301--- You look like You patched things up pretty good, huh? - Yeah.-看来你们和好如初了-没错302--Oh, we can learn so much from the children.我们能从孩子身上学到许多东西啊303--Bet it seems kind of silly now现在再回头想想打架的事304--what you were even fighting about, huh?是不是觉得当时很蠢啊305--- I made fun of his accent. - What accent?-我笑他的口音-什么口音306--I made fun of him for having the same thing for lunch every day.我笑他每天的午餐都一样307--I made fun of him because his mom used to dig coal.我取笑他因为他妈妈以前是挖煤的308--What?什么309--He said you were a coal digger.他说你是个挖煤工310--Okay. I think we can move on.好了我觉得该换个话题了311--Who said I was a coal digger?谁说我是个"挖煤工"312--That's what my mom told me.我妈告诉我的313--What's a coal digger?什么是挖煤工314--Sweetheart, he heard it wrong.宝贝他听错了315--It's "Gold digger."那叫"淘金工"[傍大款]316--I'm gonna have to call you back.我得过一会再打给你了317--I really do not think that I remember ever saying that.我真的不记得说过这话318--Well, you said in the car.其实你在车里这么说过319--You said it at Christmas.你圣诞节这么说过320--- You said it in the Mexican restaurant- - Okay, -你还在墨西哥餐厅这么说过-好了321--Mr. "Leaves His Sweatshirts at School Every Day...乖儿子你每天丢三落四322--Suddenly Remembers Everything," Thank you.今天却记忆如神真谢谢你了323--And it was all in my head, huh?还说是我自己胡思乱想哈324--Oh, listen. Gloria, it was...听我说歌洛莉亚其实325--like, a year ago, before I knew you.都是一年前的事了那时我还不了解你呢326--Nice going. 你真行啊327--Now my mom and my sister are fighting.搞得我妈和我姐吵架了吧328--If I say something that everybody else is thinking,如果我说了众人都想说的话329--does that make me a mean person?是不是意味着我很刻薄呢330--Or does it make me a brave person?或者说我很勇敢呢331--One who is courageous enough to 我就是一个有勇气332--stand up and-and say something...顶住压力挺身而出333--behind someone's back在背后悄悄地说334--to a 10-year-old.只敢在小孩面前说335--Well, she's pissed.她现在可是气疯了336--Yeah. She wouldn't even come out of her room.是啊她甚至连房间都不愿意出了337--Did you really have to call her that- a gold digger?你真的非要说她是"傍大款的"吗338--Well, you know what, Dad? It was a year ago.知道吗爸爸那可是一年前339--And it was a natural question to ask.所以人家自然而然会问啊340--She's a beautiful, hot woman,她那么漂亮那么性感341--and you're not exactly, you know-而你却不那么你懂的342--Not exactly what?不那么什么343--Um- Mitchell, little help?米奇尔帮帮忙啊344--No. You are doing great.不用你说的挺好的345--See, this is exactly why we sweep things under the rug-看见了吧所以说家事要忍着346--so people don't get hurt.这样大家才不会受伤害347--Yeah, until you sweep too much under the rug.话是没错但如果老是忍着憋着348--Then you got a lumpy rug.矛盾就越积越多349--Creates a tripping hazard. You open yourself up to lawsuits.矛盾爆发的危险也越大也会惹祸上身350--Boy, you can go a really long time without blinking.岳父大人你可以好长时间不眨眼啊351--Gloria? It's Phil.歌洛莉亚我是菲尔352--Can I talk to you for a second?能和你谈一会吗353--Claire likes to say you can be part of the problem...克莱尔总是说"你要么是问题制造者" 354--or part of the solution.要么就是问题解决者355--But I happen to believe that you can be both.而我则认为解铃还须系铃人356--Listen, Claire feels terrible.听着克莱尔感到很抱歉357--Why don't you talk to her?要不你找她谈谈358--Why? I know what she thinks- a coal digger.为什么我知道她认为我是个挖煤的359--You know she's saying "Gold digger"? 你知道她说的其实是傍大款的吧360--Yes, Phil!我知道菲尔361--Well, I-I know she said that.我知道她这么说过362--But that was a long time ago,但那是很早以前的事了363--before she knew you. 那时她尚未真正了解你364--Does Jay buy me nice things?杰是不是给我买好东西了365--Yes! Of course! All beautiful things.没错当然了全是好东西366--Look at this- yellow, red, blue.看看这些黄的红的蓝的367--All the colors.五颜六色的368--Do you think I can't live without this? 你认为我没了这些就活不了了吗369--Take them away, Phil.拿走啊菲尔370--Gloria, 歌洛莉亚371--we all know you'd be fine without underwear.我们都知道你不穿内裤也没事372--I mean, we know it's not about that.我是说我们知道你说的不是这个373--No. It's about me not being accepted by my new family.对我说的是我不被这个家庭所接纳374--That is not true. 不是这样的375--Gloria, look, you're a beautiful woman.歌洛莉亚听着你是个大美女376--In fact, you're probably one of those其实你很有可能377--beautiful women who doesn't even know it.都不知道自己是美女378--No, I know it.不我知道的379--So it's natural 所以克莱尔自然380--for Claire to wonder about you and her dad.会对你和她爸的关系产生联想啊381--This family's very protective of each other.这是个保护欲很强的家庭382--I remember the first time Claire brought me home.我还记得克莱尔第一次带我去她家的时候383--Do you think Jay thought I was good enough for his little girl?你以为杰会觉得我配得上他家千金吗384--No way. But over time,才不会但是过了一段时间385--he realized that I loved Claire as much as he did.他意识到我和他一样深爱着克莱尔386--And by then, Mitch had brought Cam home,与此同时米奇把小卡带进家门387--so I was golden.相比之下我就是金龟婿了388--Claire just needs a little time.克莱尔只是需要些时间389--And then, trust me,相信我过段时间后390--she'll be the most loyal friend you've ever had.她就会成为你最亲的闺蜜了391--You're not leaving, are you?你们不是要走吧392--You know, there's kind of a lot of drama.你也知道现在这儿闹得有点不愉快393--- So we're torn. - Let me ask you something.-我们深受折磨-我问你们点事394--Your sister said that Gloria你姐姐说歌洛莉亚395--would never go for anybody who looked like me.绝不会喜欢上我这种样子的男人396--Now, you guys basically are like women.所以说基本上你们和女人差不多397--You know, you look at guys.你们喜欢男人398--So what do you think?所以你们怎么想399--You're seriously asking us if you're attractive?你真是在问我们你是否有吸引力吗400--Well, I know I'm no Erik Estrada or anything.我知道自己算不上高帅富401--- I'm just curious is all. - Dad.-我只是好奇罢了-爸402--So if I was in one of your bars and-所以如果我出现在同志酒吧然后403--Righteous Brothers were on, you know.播着经典老歌404--Would you, uh,你会不会405--I don't know, check me out?我不知道和我搭讪406--Dad, you're really close to ruining gay for me.爸你快要毁了做基佬的情调了407--- All right, Fine. Whatever. - Jay. Jay, now listen.-那好无所谓-杰听着408--I think it's- I just think it's我觉得我只是觉得409--a little weird for a son to say this to his father.要一个儿子对父亲这么说实在太诡异410--But for the record, I think you're smokin' hot. 但我声明一下我觉得你超性感的411--Really?真的吗412--Yeah, 100%. You're totally my type.当然百分百肯定你绝对是我的菜413--You're dangerous, you're getable,你既危险又触手可及414--you have a little "Cashola" In your pocket.你荷包里又装着鼓鼓的钱415--Face, body, the whole-长相身材还是整体416--The whole kit and caboodle, I think. Really.从头到脚都特帅我觉得真的417--- What about a seven? Nine. for sure, Nine.-那有7分吗-9分绝对的9分418--- but You knew that. - I Might have lowballed a little bit.-但你肯定知道的-我有点低估自己了419--Okay, isn't there a game on?不是还有比赛呢吗420--- Touchy. - I know.-他太敏感-我知道421--Gloria? Come on, let's- let's talk about this.歌洛莉亚拜托我们好好谈谈422--I've seen her kick in a door before.我可见过她破门而入过423--I don't know what my husband is saying to you or...我不知道我丈夫和你说了什么或者424--why he's covered in your underwear.为什么他浑身都是你的内裤425--Obviously I'm trying to seduce him for his money.很显然我是看上他的钱了呗426--'Cause that's what I do, right?因为我就是这样的人嘛对不对427--What do I have to give back...我究竟要付出什么428--so that everyone trusts me? Huh?才能得到大家的信任啊429--- These earrings? - no.-耳环吗-不是430--- What? This bracelet? - no.-那是什么手镯吗-不是431--- my new dress? - no.-还是我的新裙子-不是432--I didn't respond because...我没出声是因为433--this shouldn't be about me.其实关键不在于我434--It should be about you...而在于你435--talking to you... about it.和你好好谈一谈436--Phil? Honey?菲尔亲爱的437--No, no, no. No.不不不不用438--You're welcome.不用谢439--I don't know what to say我不知道该说些什么440--except for that I am really, really sorry.只能说我真的非常非常抱歉441--Just tell me one thing.你就告诉我一件事442--How do you really feel that I'm with your father?对于我和你爸的关系你到底怎么想443--Uh, well-其实444--Honestly, at first, it was hard.说实话一开始我很难接受445--I mean, you don't expect to wake up one morning...我是说谁都不会期望有一天醒来后发现446--with a new mom who looks like she fell off a mud flap.多了一个比自己还年轻性感的后妈吧447--But... I'm getting used to it.但是我正慢慢去习惯448--And the important thing is you make him happy,而且重要的是你能让他幸福449--which you do in- in so many ways,用你的各种方法450--so many colors.五颜六色的方法451--Are we okay?我们和好了吗452--- no. - No?-没-没453--You embarrassed me in front of everyone downstairs.你让我在所有人面前出丑了454--What, I'm supposed just to forget about it?怎么要我这么轻易就忘掉吗455--What do you want me to do- 那你想要怎样456--just embarrass myself so we're even?让我也出丑这样我们就扯平了457--Go jump in the pool. 跳进泳池458--Oh, you mean go jump in a lake. Right.是让我离你远点是吧459--Go jump in the pool with your clothes on.我是让你穿着衣服跳进泳池。

Honey, do you need me to move the car? No, it's nothing. I'm alrightOh no! Iron cross, she's going downOh no! Iron cross, she's going downOh god! Phil...- You okay? - Yes. I am.I am okay.Honey, why do we keep this car?It's a classic!No, it just sits here.And the seatbelts don't work.The doors stick. It leaks fluids.We haven't put fluids in it in 10 years. Well, I'm gonna fix all that anyway.And then, uh, it's gonna be Haley's car. Oh, we're not giving this car to Haley.It's way too easy to fit a mattress in the back. Remember?Oh, no. We're selling it.What?!Unless you don't think you can.- Really? - Yeah.- Seriously? - You can't.You honestly think that's gonna work?You can't sell it.You know what?You can insult a lot of things about me...My hair, my voice, my balance-board exercises...But don't insult my selling.That crosses a line.What line? Oh, you don't see it?That's 'cause I just sold it.That's 'cause I just sold it.While the spray-tanned starlet claimsto be six weeks sober, sources down under say:She has been bar-hoppinglike a coked-up kangaroo."Ah, what's daddy reading to you?If I have to read "the very hungry caterpillar"One more time, I will snap.- oh, it's not that bad. - I will snap!So, um, I laid the toolbox outside,And all the supplies are ready,And I think we are good to go!Terrific.Aren't you gonna change into a working man's outfit?No, I'm good,And I don't think workmen really call them "outfits."We are building a princess castle for Lily.Uh, it's something every father wants to be able to do for his daughter. You know, and I fancy myselfas a bit of a castle designer.I have done a few sketches.Which we have archived so we can use the kit.- Mm, yeah. - The kit.Uh, the kit. Which, uh, we're gonna do together.I am petrified to do this with Mitchell.He built a couple of theater sets in college or something,And now he thinks he knows everything about building.Well, he doesn't.Every home-improvement project that we've undertaken.Has been a near-death experience.Make the appetizers. And then we'll be...If an accident does happen, I hope he kills me...Because I don't think I would be a very inspiring disabled person. Honey, relax.She's not here yet.You might want to play it a little cooler.You don't want to scare off your girlfriend.She's not my girlfriend!She's just coming over to study the life cycle of silkworms. Oh. She's here.She's here! okay, how's my hair?I thought it was just a friend.I heard that.I wasn't whispering.Manny, open the door. Make her feel welcome.Kelly! Good morning.Uh, I'm glad you're here.Um, this is my Mom.Nice to meet you!In my culture,mothers are very clingy to their sons.In fact, the leading cause of death among Colombian women is when their sons get married.But I'm not like that.I just want my Manny to be happy.Manny, why don't you give your friend Kelly an empanada? Oh, no, thank you.I try to stay away from trans fats.Oh, I'm sure one won't make a difference.They're Manny's favorite!I... think I'm going to stop eating trans fats, too.Mom? When was this from?Oh... That's the year your dad and I went to the rose bowl. Oh... That's the year your dad and I went to the rose bowl. - Incredible game. - Yeah.Mom, you look really pretty.Thank you, sweetheart.So, what happened?Well, Lukey, everyone gets older.Just 'cause parts of your mom aren't what they used to be,it doesn't meam...I mean, what happened in the game?We got our butts kicked by Penn state.The parade was awesome, though.Angela Lansbury was the grand marshal. Angela Lansbury was the grand marshal. "Good time," she wrote.Okay, come on, guys. Let's get back to it.No one's gonna buy this heap looking this way. Hey, mom, which one is the garbage can? Um, it...Honey, you can't throw that away.It's blankety.It's disgusting.No, sweetie, you loved blankety.You wouldn't go anywhere without him. Yeah, until Luke threw up on it.Yeah.I used to throw up all the time.Remember buckety?Oh, look at this.What is that?We went to the beach one day,and Luke had such a good time.That he wanted to being home a jar of sunshine. So he could always remember it.Do you remember, honey?Oh, no... no, no, don't... don't open it.You really think you trapped sunshine in there?I'm just letting you know now,I'm not taking care of him when you guys die.Stop. It's sweet.Still feels hot.Hey! It's that guy who came by earlier.He was really interested.What was his name? Shoot!Well, you can't be in sales and not remember people's names. That's why I like to use what they call "minimonic" devices. They're little tricks to help you remember.Um, like the other day, I met this guy named Carl.Now, I might forget that name,But he was wearing a Grateful Dead T-shirt.But he was wearing a Grateful Dead T-shirt.What's a band like the Grateful Dead?Phish. Where do fish live?[跟"鱼"读音相近]The ocean.What else lives in the ocean?Coral.Hello, "Coral".[他本想卖弄却记错了]I think it's "mnemonic".I... I think I'd remember.Okay.You can do it, dad.Okay.He looked like the drummer from foreigner. Now, foreigner's from France.France rhymes with "ants."Ants ruin a picnic.What's up, Nick?Really?Really?Well, that's great.Yeah, no, swing by anytime. We're here all day. Thanks.Guess what?You said I couldn't sell this?Well, you're gonna be eating a humble pie. Stuffed with crow and a big side of sorry,'cause I just did.In your face, girl with the negative tattoo! Honey...Wait.No!Whoa. Someone doesn't like to lose.Honey.Honey!I'm sorry.I'm sorry.When I woke up this morning, I hated that car,and even thinking about it made me mad.But then when we were going through it,and blankety...all that stuff... I just...The thought of that whole part of our life driving away... We can keep blankety.I don't want...Look at them.Come on. A minute ago, they were babies.And now they're driving.And soon we'll all be dead.Whoa! You're leaving out a few great minutes there. Retirement, old age...Cool chair that goes up the stairs.Yeah. I'm sorry.I'm... being ridiculous.Don't apologize. I love you when you're human. Listen.Hey! listen!We don't have to sell the car.Oh, sweetie, of course we do.It doesn't make any sense to keep it.Well, what can I do to make you feel better? Nothing.Unless you can build me a time machine.Honey...Until someone can figure out how to keep a wormholeUntil someone can figure out how to keep a wormholefrom collapsing in on itself.That's just a pipe dream.Sure.Phil! come on back, phil.Well, I found the...I found the nail gun.Oh. Yay.The weirdest thing... it was wrapped in an old towelstuffed in a box on the top shelf of the closet.Well, just set it down on the counter.Heads up!Oh, dad, what are you doing here?I'm, uh, just, uh, returning that crockpot that Gloria borrowed. Oh, yeah, I forgot you had that crockpot, Jay.Well, we're just getting ready to build Lily a princess castle if you...- Want to help? - Yeah, sure.Oh. Well, if it's okay with you, Mitchell.Oh, yeah! oh, no, dad.Oh, remember how much fun we hadwhen we built that bookshelf together?That was my vietnam.And I was in vietnam.Oh! Look at us!Three construction dudes!Dad, I'm gonna get you some workman gloves.I have a blue and camel.What's your preference?Surprise me.Wouldn't it be easierif we had all our stuff in the same notebook? You think?I mean, we're always going back and forth.I'll just put my things in your notebook. okay.Who wants chocolate milk?Sure, mom.- So how is it going? - Great!Kelly's moving her stuffinto my notebook.This is sudden.It just felt right.Oh, you know what you should do?Put a pinch of salt in the chocolate milk.It really brings out the flavor.Salt is for the popcorn.That sounds good.You wouldn't like it.Maybe we should let Manny decide.Okay.Here's the salt.We'll see what he likes.Wow!That's really good!Try it, mom!I don't care for it.It was delicious.I finally got Lily down for a nap.Where is Mitchell?He's not supposed to be unsupervised!Don't worry.I got him in the garage putting flags on the spires.Okay, perfect.It's better that way. Nobody gets hurt.We don't have to put flags on the spires.Yeah.All right, let's get this roof on.It's supposed to snap right into place.Hey!Whatcha got going on over there, Jigsaw?Well, I thought that I would get startedon the, uh, drawbridge while you guys worked on the roof, so... You all done with the flags?!Yeah!Yeah, it took me like 15 minutes.It was a lot easier than you made it out to be.Do something, Jay.Uh, Mitch?!Yeah.How about you make us some sandwiches?No. No, we're in the middle of this.No, I think what Jay's saying is,why don't you go sort some bolts?No, I sorted the bolts.- All of 'em? - There were six.W... what's going on with you two?Are you... are you trying to get rid of me? Uh..., Mitch.Oh, my god. You are.You're... you're, like, in cahoots.Mitchell, I get scared, when you're around tools, Honey, it's dangerous...For me, for you,for... our roses.Works better this way, kid.I mean, castle goes right up,Nobody gets sliced in half.Do you know how insulting this is? I was...I was an intern at the songbird summer playhouse. Do you think that the town of Brigadoonjust magically appeared?Well, in the play, it did, but...the set...the set was built with these two hands! Mitchell. Mitchell...The Von Trapp mansion, Evita's balcony... Okay. Okay.Oh, where are you going?I'm going on a walk,and, oh, yeah, I can still do that by myself. Watch. Oh, I hope I don't get hurt.Oh, god, who put that doorjamb there?I didn't see it.I ran right into it.Oh, no, I tripped! Walking is so hard! That one didn't look like it was on purpose. It was!Just a few more steps.Oh, sorry!Step! Step! Sorry!- Phil?! - Sorry, sorry.It's gonna be worth it.No, it's not.Don't listen to her.And...- Ow. Ow. Ow! - Sorry. Don't struggle. Stop struggling.Great. It's our car.Not a car. Kids?"ti... " what?Tonight, Claire Dunphy, we are turning back the clock to a simpler time...when families piled into their station wagons,picked up some burgers,and went on a picnic up to granger point.Honey, we don't have to do this.Listen to her.No, it's gonna be great. I talked to...France, ants, picnic...Nick, and he's not picking up the car till tomorrow. We have one more night of family fun!What's gonna be fun about it?Listen to him- Only everything. - Only nothing.Okay, kids, you know what?Your father is trying to do something nice,so I would appreciate it if you would stop your whining and just get in the car.Still does it!Oh, my!Come on, get in, get in!I'm just saying, the kid's gotta learn to let things go. Well, this is a touchy subject for Mitchell.He wants to feel like a regular joe, like you and I.Oh, pardonnez-moi.I prefer the champagne Dijon to the standard yellow.You know, there are a few areas that define us as men,like sports and construction.Mitchell just wants to feel like he's...part of the man club.Isn't that where you guys met?I know you're making a joke because you're uncomfortable, so I'll let it slide.and we met at an orgy.Come on.I just think it's crazy, that's all.So what if he can't swing a hammer?Look at all he has done.Law school, great career, providing for his family.That's manly, too, isn't it?I mean, the classical sense.Well, yes, I mean, I think it also takes a big manto quit his career as a music teacherand raise a child.You're a man, too, Cam.Thank you, Jay.Wait. Garnish. We're men...not cavemen.My great-great-grandfatherhelped build the Brooklyn bridge.And I heard that, until the day he died,every time he passed it, he was filled with such pride.He'd say, "there's a little bit of me in that bridge."I know that I'm not the handiest guy,but I'm still a man,and I want to be able to look out into my yard and say... "there's a little bit of me in that princess castle."Oh, no. No. No, no, no. No.No. Oh, no.Hey, mom.Kelly's parents are on their way.She invited me to go out to dinner and a movie with them. Is that okay?Oh, but...I thought that you and I were going to the movies tonight. You know, to see that one with Shia Labeouf.You know, to see that one with Shia Labeouf.Well, maybe we can go to the movie another night. W... what's wrong?Oh, nothing.Just my heart.Okay, sue me.I am a Colombian mother.I'm not gonna let him make a mistakethat is gonna affect him for the rest of my life!His life!Manny,I think we should talk about this Kelly girl.Isn't she great?I think she really likes me.Why wouldn't she like you, baby? Of course.Go. Have fun.I'm gonna wear my burgundy dinner jacket.Of course you are.I say we apologizeand just finish the castle together like he wanted.- Did you hide the nail gun? - Absolutely.'cause, I mean, you said that before.No, I...Oh, my gosh. It's finished.What the hell? Mitchell did that?Yes. Yes, Mitchell did it.Who's the bitch now, bitches?Honey, it looks beautiful!Well, yeah, because when you two were insideenjoying your little tea party, I was out here...out here getting stuff done.I'm sorry.We shouldn't have underestimated you.You know he's stuck in there, right?Oh, yeah.Uh, hey, kid, Cam and I are gonna go crack a couple cold ones.You want to join us?No, no, you know what?I'm just gonna stay here and get some stuff done,but you... you two ladies enjoy your light beers.How do you know we're having light beers?We only have light beers.So, well, listen.- Here is a hammer. - I don't need it. I don't need it, though. - And this is a screwdriver. - But I'm not gonna use it.And you just come on in whenever you want to.I'll be in at... yeah.You sure we shouldn't get him out of there?No. He would never forgive us.He's a very proud man, your son.Bird! Bird!Bird! ah, oh, my god! oh, my god!Yeah, I'm pretty proud of myself right now.Ohh! oh, my god!Calm down.Luke, honey, slow down.No one's gonna take your food away.Wow, this place has really changed.Time marches on, huh?See that Starbucks down there?You know what that used to be?An orange grove?No, a Burger King.You can still see some of the architecture. Thank you... for this.I really do feel better already.You can go home again, Claire.Oh, sweetie.My stomach hurts.Luke, honey, I told you not to eat so fast.Just sit back, relax. You're gonna be fine.- Ew! Spider! - Haley!-Haley! - Haley, honey,you're standing on the back of daddy's seatbelt! Oh, soft cheeses, I can breathe again.Wait. Where'd the spider go?I really need some air.Okay, Alex, lower your window.I can't. It's stuck.I forgot about that.Don't you throw up on me.Ohh. Don't point him at me!Here, I'll turn on the... Haley!!Oh! Oh, honey, I think that's the heat.It's in my mouth.It's happening!okay, grab a bag!Oh, gosh, it smells like onions!My seatbelt's stuck!I'll help you.oh, my god!Spider!Haley!!Oh, god, he's gonna blow, mom!I need buckety!Okay, everybody get out of the car!Our doors don't open!We got ya.Slow is smooth, and smooth is fast!Get out, get out.Slow is smooth, and smooth is fast, Dunphys! Nice and easy!Slow is smooth, and smooth is fast.Don't look at him!He's just gonna make you feel sick!Oh, I looked, I looked, I looked.Oh, god.Guys, the car!- I got it! - Oh, my god.Oh, my god... no!Oh, no.Oh, no.What's the plan, Phil?!At least I'm trying to do something!Dad, get off!Come on, Phil!Let it go! Let it go!Oh, my god! Honey, let it go! Honey!Stop, stop, stop.Oh, no! That's not...It's all right.I'm just...I'm just being realistic,but we're gonna need to lower the asking price.Hi, papi.You're here so soon.I decided to skip the movie.Are you okay?Yeah.Kelly didn't like my jacket.Plus, she ordered for me.Mm, did she let you hear the specials, at least?No. I don't want to be with someone who doesn't get me. Do we have any trans fats left?Of course.Besides, I think there's a girl I'd rather spend time with. Ohh, that's so sweet.I'm the luckiest mother in the world.Hey. This is Manny. Is Alicia there?Who's Alicia?She's a girl in my history class.We like to play "six degrees of sir Francis Bacon." You just tossed a woman aside.Immediately you go to the next one?!No, I just...Just... just what?!This is not the way you treat women!Men are all the same.They break women's hearts, and they don't care! Men are all animals!Hey, honey.Animal!The art of the sale is all about...what you leave out."83 classic wagon."Tough to find parts."They don't make them like this anymore."For legal reasons."Enjoyed for many years by one happy family." Of raccoons.I'm kidding. Actually...Actually, it did make us happy for a long time.It's gonna be tough to say goodbye.It always is.Nobody loves change.But...Part of life is learning to let things go.I totally thought I was gonna puke on you.I would have killed you if you did.Oh, yeah, like you killed that spider?Oh, you didn't see it. It was huge.Remember the look on mom's facewhen her seat fell down?How about when dad jumped on the hood of the car? "What's the plan, Phil?!"Mitch? Lily?Hey, we're in here!Princess is in her castle!How long have you guys been out here?Ohh. Cam, she can't get enough.We've been in here for like two hours.And we did this for her.Need me to get you out of there?This thing is not safe, Cam.Move to the back of the castle.Yeah, no. I know the drill.No, don't carry me out this time.I think it sends the wrong message to Lily.Well, the neighbors enjoy it.。

“牛大姐”的养老生活事业有成，比翼双飞童正维与马科都是相当敬业的艺术家。

童正维是上海话剧艺术中心的退休演员，退休前后演过不少影视剧，她在《编辑部的故事》中饰演敢于说话，爱挑毛病的牛大姐一角而闻名全国。

她每次拍戏都认真做好“功课”，甚至还手抄自己要演的剧本。

一次，她拿到《月嫂》剧本，为了拍好戏，翻阅资料，请教专家医生，对月嫂是怎么一回事弄得烂熟于心。

拍戏时一招一式、一颦一笑很到位。

她对拍戏的年轻演员说：只有小角色，没有小演员。

配角、小角色演得真情投入也会很出彩，成为一个好演员。

她还出演过《摩登家庭》《婆媳情》《从头再来》《上海红美丽》《花儿怒放》等影视剧作品。

马科是著名戏曲导演、上海京剧院国家一级导演，20世纪50年代被上海京剧院周信芳院长看中，挑起了导演大梁。

1956年，马科进入上海戏剧学院表演师资进修班学习，其后导演了京剧《红色风暴》《赵一曼》《武则天》《曹操与杨修》《盘丝洞》，越剧《西园记》，粤剧《潮涨潮落》及黄梅戏《红楼梦》等几十部大戏，成就卓著，影响广泛。

马科历任中国戏曲学院客座教授、上海表導演研究学会会长、瑞典斯德哥尔摩戏剧学院客座教授、中国戏曲导演学会副会长等职。

他导演的作品情节紧凑、个性鲜明、场面生动、风格大气。

他导演的《曹操与杨修》被业界认为既是现实主义的，又是传统写意的，是将两者融为一体的“新时期里程碑式的京剧作品”。

该剧在1988年全国京剧新剧目汇演中获优秀剧目奖第一名，马科获最佳导演奖，此后获得殊荣不断。

1993年，马科与瑞典皇家戏剧学院院士彼得·奥斯卡尔松互相拜师，其后两人在瑞典共同执导了话剧《仲夏夜之梦》《亨利四世》。

马科在戏剧创作和导演理论上建树颇丰，曾将他编剧或参编的十多个剧目结集出版，并发表了《试谈京剧演员接受斯坦尼心理训练的可能性》《让京剧与世界接轨》等论文。

他个人还获得第十五届白玉兰特殊贡献奖。

著名学者余秋雨称赞他是“一代戏剧家的缩影，中国集大成式人物”。

Modern Family s08e04Episode ScriptWeathering Heights1Oh,thank God.I smell coffee.This morning has gotten off to a bit ofa Rocky Horror Picture Show.What did you do to your face?Just a little colorto make my eyes pop.Like yours are now.Is this how we find outyou're transitioning?Oh,please don'tpick a young name.The world doesn't needa50-year-old Jasmine.Trust me,this'll lookcompletely normal on camera.This just in--I'm gonna be on the news.They're doing a segmenton the real-estate market,and I'm their local expert.Back to you,Claire.I'm still reeling from the lasttime you were on the news.NEWSCASTER:And while peoplehave found all sorts of waysto beat the heat,one local man is using his head.Is it warm out?I hadn't noticed.Oop.Looks like I needto re-apply.To clown college?Haley,go with him.Make sure he getsall that stuff off his face.I'll pack paper towelsand a squeegee.Ugh.What is wrong with me?I feel so fuzzy.Oh,stop being so hard on yourself.It's just arm hair. (sighs)I can't figure out this crossword puzzle.I--I think monoturned my mind to mush.What's the clue?Maybe I can help.(laughs)Thanks,Mom.Feels good to laugh.What is so funny?I am a well-readcollege graduate.I think I'm capable ofdoing a crossword puzzle. Okay,professor.Six-letter word,Archimedes'exclamation.I don't like you right now. Ugh.Why can't I get this? Archimedes'exclamation. Eureka.We may never knowthe answer to that clue,but it made me realizethis was my chanceto finally beatAlex at Scrabble.I have never beaten her.She's not the nicest winner. (gasps)I win,you lose!I win!I win!You lose!Win,win,win,win,win,win,win!Lose,lose,lose,lose,lose! -Thank you for bweakfast.-You're welcome,sweetie. (sighs)Did you hear that? "Bweakfast."It's a good thing that we're taking him to speech therapy.I want everybody to understand every single thing he says.(thick accent)Do you want marmalade on your brioche toast? Not a clue.You're probably right to nipthat speech problem in the bud. Mitchell had a lispwe let slide.Now we got a lifetimeof"What if?"That is so offensive.A lisp doesn't make you gay. Being gay makes you lisp.Well,I finished the videofor my Juilliard application.I think they'regoing to be blown away.Art school,huh?Well,you can alwayssell orangesby the side of the road.Don't listen to him.Go to your art school,be a playwright.Thank you.You can live hereas long as you want.How does an artsy,well-read, child of divorceA Columbian droppedIn the middleof a forgotten plotIn suburbiawith confidence and--(click)You copied that from that play"Hamilton,"right?I'm not sure"copied"is the word.It's more of an homage. Well,I homaged it abouttwo weeks on"Jay Talking." You saw that episode,right? -Okay.-I rhymed"rice pudding" with"Cuba Gooding."Both delicious,by the way. (sighs)Oh,good God.There are thousands of"Hamilton"parodies,and half of themare college applications.It's okay,Papi.Maybe the people in New York haven't heard about"Hamilton."(sighs)The deadline for early admission is tomorrow. I'll never come up with something great by then. Yes,you will,and I'll help. You'd do that for me? Anything for you,kid.I got to get this kidout of the house.All his crazy quirks.The farther away,the better.I keep leaving brochures around for schools at sea.All right,carb up,buddy. Tackle these pancakeslike it's fourth and goalon the one-yard line.(both laugh)Good one,Coach.Life's more fun when you put stuff in football terms. Pancakes,yay!Oh,uh,we're actuallyout of those.(muffled)You can have the rest.No,no!We put someperformance supplements in there that could mess withyou as a lady.What else is there?Well,I'm going tothe store later.In the meantime,you can have some fruit.That's real?I thoughtit was just for show.My star player Dwighthas been living with usever since his fatherwas transferred toan army base in Florida.He's doing his partfor our country,so I thought I could domy part for our team.Who's to say whothe bigger hero is.I will.He is.I've had to wake up a half hour earlier to use the bathroom--The soldier is the hero.Ugh.What are we gonna do?Oh,sweetie,I know.-Ready to go?-Yes!Yes!Dwight and I are going shopping. He's gonna help me pick out some cool new kicks.Like Richard Gere takingJulia Roberts to the store.That is right.We watched "Pretty Woman"last night. (giggles)I guess that would've beenmy window to eat something. Okay,hold still.You have very deep-set eyes.In college,they called my"The Raccoon."Although,that could've been because I climbed inthrough the doggy doorat Zeta house and stole a pie. My God.I'm beautiful.(laughs softly)Honey,you could do thisfor a living.I have thought about it.I've been practicing on people since Luke was3.Mo-o-o-o-ther nature.You're not gonna believewho's behind you.-Rainer Shine!-Who?The weatherman.Don't you watch the news? Yeah,at the gas station.He's coming this way.JustWhoa,careful now.There's a stipulationin my contract--I have to bethe best-looking guy here. (laughs gushingly)Stop it.Rainer Shine.It's,just,s-so nice to meet you.That isn't yourreal name,is it?Ow,I'm not letting you behind that curtain.That's my name,and these are my teeth.My name's Phil Dunphy.I'm doing a littlereal-estate segment.Could become a regular thing. This is my make-upartist/daughter,Haley Dunphy.It is a pleasure.You know,I thinkyou sold my neighbor'shouse--Doris Jacobs.Uh,white,mid-century,big back porch?That's her.(chuckles)I need to wash my hands.Where's the restroom?Oh,of course.You're gonna want togo down that hallway,push through the big double doors. You're gonna see someair vents on the way there.It's just pastthat cold-air system.Bring a sweater.It tends to get a little chilly in that neck of the woods.-Wow.-Wow.Nice shooting the breezewith you,Phil.You too.Hey,uh,listen.This might be kind weird,but would you everwant to grab a beer?Sure.Sounds like fun.All right!(chuckles)Here you go.Oh!C--call me three times. (chuckles)I'm kidding.Just call me once.Tonight--if you're around.I'll see if I can squeezeyou into my10-day outlook. (laughing)Okay.Do meet your heroes.What have you got?What says to Juilliard,"I'm your guy"?I look straightinto the camera and say,"Molière,Beckett,Delgado." Yes,it's boldto include my own name,but so is the sheer actof putting pen to paper.You're kidding,right?Why?What's wrong?It's smug and privilegedand precious.No art school's gonna want that. Okay.How about this?We open ona blank sheet of paper.Under a Mozart fugue,we suddenly see a drop of blood. Is it the admissions committee slitting their wrists?(sighs)Fine.The year is18--No!You're onthe wrong track here.They're gonna geta million applicationsfrom artsy little snots.You've got to stand out.When everybody else zigs,you've got to zoink.Isn't it"zag"?Exactly.Hi.We're back.I don't know what this is,but I love it.There's mud out front,so Dwight insisted.Apparently,they're not cool after you get them dirty.Oh!Last night,we also watch"An Officer and a Gentleman." Yeah,he lift me upwhere I belong.-(laughs)Okay.-Knock,knock!Yeah.Hi,Ms.Pasternack.I got to go meet some friends. -I'll see you guys later?-Okay.Be careful,Dwight. Here.I brought bysome more liquor bottlesfor Lily's project.Wha--wh--What project?I don't know.I caught her going throughmy garbage,and she saidshe needed liquor bottles. Well,that's weird.Anyway,tell her I'll havea couple more for her tomorrow. Okay.Bye-bye.Take care.She can't baby sit anymore. What project?I don't know.(bottles clank)We've got a problem here. Look what I foundunder Dwight's bed.-Oh.-Oh.Yeah,it's too bad.He brought such a greatenergy to the house.Mitchell.I just need a minuteto process this.But the bottom line Karen is your viewers should workwith a realtor they can trust. Someone they canlook in the eye.Boop!I'm confused.You want me to see that?Well,someone there saidI was a real natural.I can't remember who it was. Oh,that's right--Rainer Shine.The cheesy weatherman?No,the award-winning meteorologist.He's the recipient ofback-to-back Golden Showers.That cannot bethe actual name---It's their Oscars.-Oh.Anyway,I gave him my number. He called.-We're grabbing drinks tonight. No big deal.-I agree.Please.We both knowit's a super big deal.I am happy that you havea new friend.Be good to have some guy time. Yeah.WellMy makeup.(sighs)I have,like,three D's.Well,it's better thanany report cardyou ever brought home.What are you guys doing? Skydiving.Ugh.I see wherehe gets it from.Wake me when it's my turn.I thought I could finallybeat her because she's sick.I just want her to lose so bad. Yeah.So do I.(scrabble pieces rattling) Cheating?Are we really doing this?That smug sister of yoursneeds to be taken down a peg. Ooh!Peg.Think bigger.Pegs.(Exhales sharply)Okay,Joe,repeat after me.Red rover,red rover,red rover. Wed wovah,wed wovah,wed wovah. Okay,now I want you to try it with a big smile on your face. TOGETHER:Red rover,red rover,red rover. Oh.(chuckles)I am sorry.It's just sometimes I feellike my accent gets a little [mumbles unintelligibly.]and it's gonnarub off on Fulgencio Joseph. Well,you shouldn'tblame yourself,if that's what you just said.I actually have someexercises that can help you.Like[Stressing consonants.] Betty bought a bit of butter,but found the butter bitter. (heavy accent)Betty bought a bit'a bootie,but da bootie bittah.Uh(dog barking)This is a pretty bad neighborhood,Jay.This is the storythat we're telling--Scrappy young kid,born into povertywith the deckstacked against him.I have a calligraphy tutor.Hop out.I want to start shooting.Hey,you're staying in car?I'm gonna drivealongside and film you.Go ahead.It's perfectly safe.(door locks click)Hey.Did you justlock the door?The car does that automatically. Here.Try on this hair net.Isn't this a littleover the top?Was"Stand and Deliver"over the top?Yes,it was.Fine,then act angry,like you're sick oftaking ordersfrom the white man.(sighs)Yeah,that I can do.Walk along that wall,read from your script.Go.(clears throat)Hola!"Welcome to the streetsI call home.It's tough out here,so I've had to be tougher. Because in a place where violence is currencyand painis your best friend"Okay,this is embarrassing. Please don't shoot this.You're doing good!Hey,pretend likeyou're climbing over the wall,in case we want to saythis is Mexico.Not gonna happen.Fine.Here's some spray-paint. Bubble letter mesomething about gringos. (doorbell rings)Oh,I wonder who that could be. Oh,Officer.Is there a problem?I'm here to arrestDwight Bullockfor underage drinking.We wanted to give Lily a chance to come clean on her own. Luckily,we havea friend of a friendwho dresses as a cop for work. He also undressesas a cop for work.Remember,just act upset,okay? Okay.Dwight Bullock.I have to arrest you. (gasps)You've been a bad boy. (blubbers)But I didn't do it!I'm innocent!I don't know how that bottle got under the bed!Now we're gonnatake it down a notch.Hold out your wrists.I've got to take you downtown. Dwight,I am verydisappointed in you.There's no more football. (gasps)No more school.Lily,is there anythingyou'd like to say to Dwight before he's taken to jail.I guess.Martha Stewart saidshe used the prison timeto work on herself.That is enough!W-w-we know you put the bottle under Dwight's bed.You owe him an apologythis minute.It isn't fair!He eats everything,he's always in the bathroom,you're watching movieswith him,shopping with him.And you two don't evenlove me anymore!-Lily!-That is not--Lily,honey!Do you have the keys to these?I usually let the person whohired me find it in my pants.Well,if thatis the custom,I--Mitchell.Oh,my God.Again?Small bladder,big brain.That's why we're tied.I need a"T,"an"L,"and a"W.""T,""L"Hopefully she's too sleepyto notice that she gotthree W's on her board.Also,can I take a pee?(P)Yeah.Coming right up.-Hmm.-Something wrong?I texted Rainer,like,three hours ago.He hasn't responded.I'm sure he's justplaying hard to get.It's just weird.We hadsuch a great time last night.I bet he's busy.He's a weathermanin southern California.He has to be ready in case temperatures plungebelow70degrees.For your information,there is a wind advisory tonight.In fact,I'm gonnago take down my chimes.(cell phone dings)Whoa!-Oh.-Not him?No.I sold a house.(laughs)He's probablyjust having dinner.He could be on a date. Apparently,he's quite the player.Makes sense.That couldcharm the pants off--What the what?!Hey,Dad.There he is!(laughs nervously)What is happening?Why are you kissing him?He dropped someserious cash at dinner,so I figured,what the hell? And you.How could you do this?Do what?Actually,I'm--I'm taking itkind of slow becauseshe's your daughter.Yeah,she is,and she's half your age.You're despicable.Oh,come on.Now,listen.Hi.Claire.Rainer,come in.We'll just talk this out.I would like that becauseI--I don't quite understand--What friendship means?Look,Phil,I--I want to figure this out,but right now,I have toget to Chavez Ridge-and cover this wind event.-Mm.You know what?We're not friends.Go.GetPhil?You're being ridiculous.You really want to leavethings like that?From now on,we're gettingour weather from Tricia Tazaki! (door slams)(sighs)(annunciating exaggeratedly) Fred fed Ted bread.Ted fed Fred bread.What am I looking at?Joe's doctor gave me somesp-heech exer-cisesto help me speakmore clear-ely.The problem is I fee-earI have forgottenhow I used to talk.Well,if it's any consolation, this isn't any worse.Manny!Check this out.I think I took a stab at finishing your video essay. JAY:In a world dividedinto the haves and have-nots,a boy was born.It's tough out here,so I've had to be tougher.JAY:On the streets,you can't trust anyone.Even your closest compadre could turn on you.Please don't shoot!Every day wasa battle for your s--(click)I can't send this to Juilliard. It's all lies.That's right,Manny.Do not change who you areor you will lo-o-osewhat makes you spe-cial.Am I still do-ing it?They're not all lies.I hear you the storiesyou two tell aboutthe neighborhoods you lived in, growing up onthe passenger seat of a cab. Sure,I put in whatwe professionals call"sizzle," but this is a part ofwho you are.And it's a lot easierto root forthan a kid who insists that 72%of his chocolate is cocoa. It's"cacao."I believe thatthat is his point.What was that?How about I ask the questions. When did you two set upthis little rendezvous?While I was killing iton the air?He called me today.How'd he get your number?He said you gave it to him. That lying sack--Uh-oh.(both laughing)Anyway,I datedmy makeup girl for a while,but,uh,thenshe had to leave town.Oh.Wow.Well,if--ifit's not crossing a line,can I give you my daughterHaley's number?-Really?-Yeah,she's available,and she actuallyexpressed some interest.Well,I'm definitely interested. (chuckling)Well,thenlet's make this happen.-Phil Denphy,you are the best! -No.I thought it was abouta makeup job.I like him.He's a good guy.No,he's not.He's a great guy.Dad,run to him.(inhales sharply)Claire,I'm going out!(door closes)UhAdmit it,it's over.I'm ahead by50points,and you have two tiles left. There's got to be something!I--ugh--Why can't I see it?!Six months ago,I was at Caltech,and now--ugh--work. Relax,honey.It's just a game.What if it's more than that? What if mono permanently changed my brain?I've always defined myselfby my intelligence,and if that's gone,who am I?A loser.Luke!No!We cheated.Luke and I messed withthe tiles.-What?!-Yeah,it's just that,you're the smartest onein the family,and you always rub it in,and it doesn'tmake us feel good.Wow.I am so sorry.I feel terrible that I've been making you guys feel this way. Thank you for opening upto me about it.Otherwise,I never would have known that you cheated,which means thatI win,you lose!I win!You lose!I win!You lose!I win[panting.]you lose. God,I'm so tired.If you want to shave off her eyebrows,I'm cool with that. Lily,honey,what're you doing? Okay.Her first ice out.Be strong.G--Lily.All right,all right,come on. What you did to Dwightwas wrong,okay?We're very disappointed in you. Yes,and there'sgonna be consequences.-Mm-hmm.-No electronics for a week. That'll be worsefor you than for me.No dessert.Okay,that hurts.That being said,we could've handled things a little bit better. We should've talked to youbefore having Dwight move in.You mean I could havestopped it?Well,no,but at leastwe would've know how you felt,and we could've made thingseasier for you.Sweetie,look,I,of all people, know what it feels liketo go from beingthe center of attention--I went through it withmy parents back on the farm,when they brought homea seven-poundlittle pinkbundle of joy and said,"You're gonnashare your room--"We all know it's gonna be a pig. Anyway,he would snore(giggles)Okay,I'm sorry I lied.(sighs)Thank you.You have to apologizeto Dwight,too.I'll try to catch himin between bites.Oh!(chuckles)Hey,I have an idea.Let's think of something we canall do together,okay?Just the four of us.Anything you want.Absolutely anything.Three years ago,they gave me an"absolutely anything,"and I wasted it on a Popsicle. That was not gonna happen again. Well,now,this isa lovely party.-Mm.-It's a splendid afternoon.-More tea?-No thanks.My cup is still full. No,it isn't.But I didn't drink it all.Just take the tea.(wind howling)Anyway,afterthe lightning strike,I had the perm for,like,two years.How's that?Rainer!Phil.What are you doing here?You're not one of thosestorm chasers,are you?Not since the movie"Twister" exposed how cutthroat it is.I came here to apologize.Oh,you don't have to do that. Yes,I do.I was confused,and I said a bunch of stuffthat you didn't deserve.It did hit me,right around the mid-section. Listen,Haley's old enoughto make her own decisions.I really like her,but if dating her is gonna be a problemI don't lovethe25-year age difference.It's actually202--Le--I would justhate to thinkthat dating her meantthat you and Istill couldn't be,you know,friends.You still want to be friends?I do!Phil,I know a million people,but I really don't havea lot of real friends.Not even the sports guy?You guys are alwayslaughing so crazy hardout of the commercials.Chip Fielder?No.That's all fake.Fake as Tricia Tazaki's shelter dogs!(chuckles)Careful,buddy.Look,maybe you should go.I'm not going anywhere!I'm going live in a second. You're in my shot.Oh.I get it.Call me.Call me!(wind howling)That's right,Steve,but you're gonna wantto leave your kitesat home tonight.My wind-erful forecastright after this.(sighs)(Uplifting music plays)My name is Manny Delgado,and I'm two people.I'm the childof an immigrant single mother, who taught me to believein myself and dream big.I'm also the step-sonof a businessmanwho opened his homeand his heart to meand showed me,by example, how to makethose dreams come true. Whatever I am,whatever I have to give,is a product of these twovery different worlds.It was so sweetthat Jay cried a little bit.He's a good kid.And it's gonna be weirdaround here without him,but at least I'll alwayshave my special girl.Mmm!And you'd never leave me,would you,baby?Mm!I just want you to knowI'm really okay with youdating Rainer.Thanks,Dad.Yeah,he's gota really nice house--Jacuzzi tub in his bathroom. Don't love that you know that. Look up.Hey,he mentionedthis hair spraythat's just oiland a little sea salt.Oh,that's more forconditioning that hold.Okay,wow,that was a close one. All right.Now,brushblot(smacks lips)(smacks lips)-And beautiful.-Thanks,honey.It's really great they'rehaving you back on the news. No,no,I'm gettinga new driver's license photo.。

1--Riley Morton coming up now.赖利·莫顿上场2--Kelly at second. Started the inning with a double.之后是凯利开局就是个漂亮的双杀3--That seems like an hour ago.局势看起来跟一小时前一样4--- Honey, I thought you were gonna take out the garbage. - I am.-亲爱的你不是要倒垃圾嘛-是的5--High fly to right. Hooking, hooking- Foul.右侧高飞球曲线飞出界外球6--- Phil. - Yes. Getting it.-菲尔-收到马上去7--I was- I was gonna get it.我本来马上就要去倒的8--- Dylan. - Hey, Mrs. Dunphy.-迪兰-你好邓菲太太9--Um, I'm just waiting for Haley.我在等海莉10--- Did you ring the bell? - I texted.-你按门铃了吗-我给她发短信了11--She said she'd be down in just a minute.她说她马上就下来12--- Oh, great. Tell her I said "Hi." - I will.-那好替我向她问好-没问题13--Dylan! D-Money!迪兰迪迪仔14--Chillin' with Dylan the villain!古惑小迪仔快乐摇又摆15--- "D" To the "Y" To the- - Hey, Mr. Dunphy.-小迪的迪迪兰的兰-邓菲先生16--Hey! Come on in.快进来17--You're just in time to catch the end of the game.你刚好赶上看比赛结果18--Oh, I'm not really a baseball guy.我实在对棒球无爱19--Haley says "Hi."海莉也向你问好20--I was just being facetious. 我刚刚是开玩笑的啦21--Come on. I'll catch you up.来叔跟你说说赛况22--Sit it. Park it.坐下速度点23--Come on. I don't bite.放轻松人家又不会吃了你24--Kidding.逗你玩儿25--I'm kidding.逗你玩的啦26--Okay. See that guy? He's the tying run.看到那家伙了吗就是他把比分拉平的27--Interesting story about him.特别有趣的是28--He's been stuck on second base forever,他一直被困在"二垒"那一步29--and I'm pretty sure he's gonna try and steal third,我敢说他要试着偷上"三垒"了30--which is just a terrible, terrible idea.我觉得这是个馊主意31--How are you and Haley doing?你跟海莉上到几垒了32--I wish I could stay home with you and fly toy airplanes.我真希望能跟你一起宅在家玩玩具飞机33--These aren't toy airplanes, Manny.这可不是玩具飞机曼尼34--These are models, and they're very complicated.这叫模型非常复杂的玩意儿35--You wanna fly one of these, you gotta be familiar with airfoil,要想成功让它飞起来就必须了解螺旋桨36--drag, lift and thrust-拉你空气浮力和推力等等37--and these are all principles of aerodynamics.全都是航空动力学的基本原理38--The box says "12 and up."可盒子上写着"适宜12岁及以上人群"39--What?什么40--You can fly toy planes with Jay next time.下次你再跟杰一起玩飞机41--- Today you have To spend time with Luke. - Why?-今天你得跟卢克待在一起-为啥啊42--Because his mother invited you, so you go.因为他妈邀请你去所以你就得去43--Family needs to be close. Right, Jay?家庭成员间需要亲密相处对吧杰44--I'm pretty sure this is a typo.这肯定是印刷错误45--Men need their hobbies. Manny's father had many hobbies.男人得有点爱好曼尼他亲爹可有一大堆46--Like hiking in the desert,比如沙漠徒步旅行47--that kind of skiing that they drop you from the-还有从那什么玩意儿上蹦下来滑雪的那个48--How do you say in English?那玩意儿用英语怎么说来着49--- Helicopter. - Yes.-直升机-没错50--Once, on a dare, he even boxed with an alligator.有一次他被人激将竟然跟鳄鱼打拳击51--Wrestle. You wrestle-那叫格斗格斗52--You can't box with alligators.跟鳄鱼可打不了拳击53--Are you sure?你确定吗54--How would they get the gloves on those little claws?就它们那小爪子怎么戴得上拳击手套55--- Aren't they like tiny little hands? - No!-看起来不像小手手吗-像个屁56--Okay, now I forgot what we're talking about.好吧现在我都忘了我们刚刚在说什么了57--Anyways, hobbies are important for the men,不管怎样对爷们儿来说兴趣爱好很重要58--whether you're risking your life...无论是以命相赌的惊险爱好59--or flying little planes from a safe distance.或是离得远远地玩小飞机都一样60--Wait, wait, wait. What are you doing?等等这是要去哪儿61--Uh, we're just gonna buy some diapers. It'll just take a second.我们得去买点尿布几分钟就好62--- This is Costco. - Yeah, which is where we buy diapers.-是好市多超市哎-没错就是买尿布的地方啊63--Since when?什么时候开始的64--Do you remember when we adopted that baby a few months back?你还记得几个月前我们收养了个孩子吗65--Since then.就从那时起66--Mitchell is a snob.米奇尔是个势利小人67--No. N-No, I-I'm discerning.才不是人家那叫有见识68--Official slogan for snobs.势利小人的常用借口69--When we first met, he wouldn't even look at me...我们第一次见面时他都没正眼瞧过我70--because I was a hick from the farm in Missouri,因为我只是一个密苏里来的乡巴佬71--and he's a big city mouse.而他却是个城市佬72--Who says "City mouse"?谁会说"城市佬"这个词73--Country mice.与乡巴佬对应嘛74--- I think I'm gonna go wait in the car. - Okay.-我还是去车里等吧-好的75--Hey, if you're on your way out, can you grab the garbage?你出去时能顺手把垃圾给倒了吗76--- I got it. - Okay. we got it.-我已经倒了-那好用不着你了77--- He's a little jumpy. - Oh, go figure--他有点坐不住啊-你想想看78--a teenage boy doesn't want to hang out with his girlfriend's dad.哪个小男生想跟女朋友老爹一块玩儿79--Thought we were past all that.我以为我们的关系早超越那个了80--I'm all about-我还想81--- I'm all about taking it to the next level. - Really?-跟他培养超亲密关系呢-是吗82--- thought you were all about keeping it real. - Yes.-我还以为你会踏实点呢-本来也是83--But the whole point of keeping it real is但是做得踏实一点84--so you can take it to the next level.也是为了能发展超亲密关系85--Did you really not know that?你是真不明白吗86--You haven't exactly taken it to the next level with my dad.你跟我爸可没有发展超亲密关系呢87--What are you talking about?你在瞎说什么啊88--We've been married for 16 years,我们都结婚16年了89--and you still walk on eggshells around him.你在我爸身边还畏畏缩缩的放不开90--What? Are you kidding?什么开什么玩笑啊91--Jay and I are total buds.我跟杰那可是铁哥们儿92--You-You want to just hang out?你只是想找个伴出去玩玩吗93--Brought six friends, so that just-我带上了6个好哥们儿[啤酒] 所以94--That's-就是...95--Manny brought his favorite game to play with Luke.曼尼把他最喜欢的桌游带来跟卢克一起玩96--It's called Empire.叫帝国时代97--You use strategy to expand territories and take over the world.玩家要运用策略攻城掠地一统天下98--Luke is gonna love that. He's out back playing.卢克会爱死这游戏的他正在后院玩呢99--Do you need me to get you something while I'm out shopping?我要出去买东西需要给你带点什么回来吗100--That's such a nice offer, but I think we're good. Thanks.多谢好意了不过用不着多谢101--Okay. What about this?你看这样如何102--You don't even say "Hello" To Gloria and Manny?你都不跟歌洛莉亚和曼尼打招呼的吗103--Hi, Gloria and Manny. Okay, Mom, what about this?嗨歌洛莉亚和曼尼妈到底怎么样104--- No. You're wearing a dress. - Mom, come on.-不行必须穿裙子-妈拜托105--What? It's gonna kill you to look like a girl for one afternoon?怎么啦今天一下午穿得像个女孩会死吗106--But it's a wedding for some friend of yours I never even heard of.要结婚的可是你的朋友虽然我完全没听说过107--It's non-negotiable. You can borrow a dress of Haley's again.没得商量裙子你可以再去跟海莉借108--No. 才不要109--That sends an ugly message- that I'm Haley.那会让人错以为我是不争气的海莉110--You know, instead of trying to force me to wear a dress,比起逼着我穿裙子111--why don't you worry about getting Luke to wear some pants?你是不是更该操心怎么让卢克穿裤子112--What? Why does he do this?什么他这是要闹哪样113--Luke!卢克114--Pants! Come on!拜托快穿裤子115--Jay and I are buds, for sure-我跟杰真是铁哥们儿真的116--but with kind of, um, an invisible asterisk.但我们的亲密关系外界看不出来117--Um, he's not, uh- He's not a talker.他嘛不是很爱说话118--Or-Or a hugger.也不喜欢拥抱119--Once he ran over my foot with his car.有一次他开车碾过我的脚120--To-To be fair, he had just given up smoking,不过说实话那时他刚戒烟很烦躁121--but basically we're-we're buds.但基本上我们绝对是铁哥们儿122--Do you have to just stand there?你非得在那傻站着吗123--You're making me feel uneasy.你这样弄得我很不自在124--Oh, for God's sake. Sit here. Here.老天啊你就坐那吧125--Hold this wing like this while I adjust this.像这样扶住机翼我要调下这边126--Okay.好的127--Come on. Here.过来坐这儿128--Not too hard.不要太用力129--Alex, why don't you come shopping with me?艾丽克斯何不跟我购物去呢130--Maybe I can help you find something that you like.也许我能帮你找到些你喜欢的东西131--That's a really nice offer, but it's not really her thing.多谢你的好意了但她不怎么喜好逛街132--Actually, I'd love to go.实际上我挺想去的133--See, you don't know what my thing is.老实说你完全不知道我的喜好是什么134--You have no idea what my thing is.你对我的喜好一无所知135--I know what your thing is.我知道得非常清楚136--Your thing is to provoke, just like your sister's thing...你就爱激怒老娘发火你姐呢137--is to never come out of her room, 就是一天到晚宅在房里138--and your brother's thing-而你那个老弟呢139--Well, there's your brother's thing.就好这一口140--Luke! Put 'em on! Mm-hmm.卢克快穿上裤子141--The thing about me and Jay is our relationship's...我跟杰的关系存在的问题就是...142--always been stuck in that,总是停滞不前143--that primal place where it started.总在原地踏步144--You know, he's the old silverback protecting his females,你懂的他就像个护雌的银背大猩猩145--then along comes this younger, stronger gorilla swinging in, 一旦有一只更年轻力壮的猩猩进入族群146--beating his chest.把老的那只打败了147--You know, naturally, the ape ladies come running,你懂的很自然的那些雌猩猩就会148--presenting their nice scarlet behinds.投怀送抱求勾搭求包养149--Papa ape wants to stop all that, but he can't.猩猩爸爸想要阻止但办不到150--You know? That's-That's life. I'm not the enemy.你明白吗生命规律就是那样的我不是敌人151--The enemy is poachers.偷猎者才是152--That'll do it. Don't touch it.好了别碰153--All right.好吧154--- you wanna go fly it? - Sure.-一起玩飞机去吗-好啊155--Oh. Hey, I got the toothpaste and the soap.我拿了牙膏和香皂156--Good. Now we can open that general store.真棒现在我们都能开杂货店了157--I thought we were just here to get diapers.我还以为我们只是来买尿布的呢158--We had a saying on the farm:农场里有句俗话流传很广159--as long as you're bringing the mule to the market, you-既然已经把骡子拉到集市上...160--I feel you rolling your eyes at me.我感觉到你在对我翻白眼161--We met at one of Pepper's legendary game nights.我们是在胡娇组织的一次传奇游戏夜上相识的162--I remember Mitchell because 我对米奇尔有印象是因为163--he kept rolling his eyes every time I would get a little boisterous.每当我兴奋地喊叫他就冲我翻白眼164--I did not.我才没有165--A little bit.有一点儿哦166--Yeah, maybe a little bit.好吧或许吧167--Anyway, we were- we were playing charades,总之我们在玩字谜游戏时168--and I had no idea how to act out my clue.我不知道该怎么把线索用手势表演出来169--And all I could think of to do was-我只能想到这么来比划170--And without missing a beat, Cam says-而小卡立马就回答到171--Casablanca.卡萨布兰卡172--- all I Did was This- - Casablanca.-我就这么比划了下-卡萨布兰卡173--Casablanca.卡萨布兰卡174--Can we just please get the diapers and get out of here?我们能不能只拿尿布买单闪人175--Fine, but I wanna stop by the wine section first.没问题不过我想先去瞧瞧酒水区176--Wait. There's a wine section?等等这儿居然有酒水区177--Yeah, a really good one- just past the tires.当然挺棒的就在轮胎区后面178--No way. They do not have- Oh, my God.不可能他们才没有... 天呐179--Oh, my- Cam. Cam. The paper shredder I wanted.天啊小卡是我想要的那种碎纸机耶180--Huh? Confetti and crosscut.瞧瞧五彩纸屑还能横切181--Yep.棒182--Oh, my God. Amazing.老天啊好满足呀183--Yeah.是啊184--Cam, what is this place?小卡这地方叫什么185--Those cookies smell like heaven. Your own recipe?此香只应天上有是你的独家秘方吗186--No, I just throw 'em in the oven.不我只是随便丢进烤箱烤烤罢了187--And added the secret ingredient of caring?但加了爱心作为神秘配料对吧188--Sure.没错189--So, you and Luke having a good time?你跟卢克玩得开心吗190--I don't know. He won't come out of his box.我也不知道他不愿意把头上的盒子拿掉191--Maybe I'll just stay here and spend some time with my sister.也许我可以待在这儿跟姐姐聊会儿天192--Oh, right. I guess technically I would be your stepsister.对噢好像严格说来我是你继姐哦193--My mother says we are never to use the word "Step"我妈不让我们说"继"字儿194--Because it means "Not real."因为那意味着不是真的195--And we are a real family. Mmm.而我们是个真正意义上的家庭196--So what is the matter, Claire?有什么问题吗克莱尔197--- What? - you seem sad.-什么-你看起来不大高兴啊198--It's just stuff with Alex.让艾丽克斯给气饱了199--You know, kid stuff.小孩子的问题你懂的200--Kids.小孩子201--You don't have to tell me. My school is full of them.别跟我提孩子我学校里一堆小屁孩202--I was thinking after lunch we can go and do a little shopping.我想午饭后我们能一起去逛街203--I'm not getting a dress.我可不会买裙子的204--I don't care. I'm not your mother.我才不管我又不是你妈205--I know. You're my grandmother.我知道你是我外婆嘛206--Step-grandmother.继--外婆207--Anyways, today, think of me as a girlfriend.不管怎么说今天就把我当成你的闺蜜208--Two girls out for an afternoon of fun.午后时光两个小闺蜜一起找点乐子209--What do you usually do with your girlfriends?你一般跟你的闺蜜们干什么呢210--I don't know. We go out. We talk, drink wine.不一定逛街啊八卦啊喝酒啊211--- Can I drink wine? - No.-我能喝酒吗-没门儿212--Some friend.真"够朋友"213--Well, you can still talk to me about anything.你可以跟我聊聊天啊什么话题都行214--Yeah, adults always say that, but they don't mean it.大人们都这么说但都是口是心非215--When my mom says I can ask her anything, 每次我妈说我想问什么都行216--I really can't.其实根本不行217--She just freaks out.我的问题直接把她逼疯218--I won't freak out. Shoot.我不会被逼疯的放心说吧219--Okay.那好220--How many men have you slept with?你跟几个男人上过床221--Eight. Next.8个下个问题222--- Now Can I try it? - No.-我能试试吗-不行223--I should get one of those. I've always loved planes.我也应该买一个我爱死飞机了224--If things had gone a little differently in my life,如果上天能给我一次重来的机会225--I think I would have been a pilot.我可能是个飞行员226--Hey, what would happen if you turned the remote off如果把遥控开关关了227--and then back on real fast?然后又马上打开会发生什么事呢228--Yeah, you'd have been a great pilot.你还真是个当飞行员的"好料子"229--So, can you do a- Can you do a loop-de-loop?那个你能来个空中大回旋吗230--If I wanted to.只要我想就行231--No way! Can I try it?不是吧能让我试试吗232--No.不行233--I can see why you like this. It's so peaceful.我知道你为什么爱玩飞机了能修身养性234--It's like the whole world just... disappears out here.就像世界的纷纷扰扰全不见了一样235--- I remember this one summer- - I'll tell you what.-我还记得有年夏天-我跟你说236--There's another trick called "Threading the needle."我还会个绝招叫"穿针引线"237--I used to do it with Claire and Mitch when they were kids.克莱尔和米奇还小的时候我常做给他们看238--- You wanna try it? - How's it go?-想看看吗-要怎么弄239--You grab one of those hoops over there...从那边拿个圈圈240--and go to the far, far, far end of the field...然后走到很远很远很远的地方241--and stand there, and I fly the plane through it.站着别动我会让飞机从圈圈里钻过去242--Um, that sounds awesome!听起来真酷243--- And then I get a chance flying it? - No.-然后我也能试下吗-不行244--Okay.好吧245--How's this?这儿行不246--Not far enough. Go on.不够远再站远点247--- Okay. Further down. - You can't go too far.-好的-越远越好248--Right. Okay, I get it. I get it.好的我懂的249--- How's this? - Good.-站这儿行不-挺好250--Now stand still. Don't move.站好了千万别动251--Okay, let's do it. Whoo!好的来吧252--Whoo! I love it!太酷了我喜欢253--I love... it!我就喜欢254--You drove a plane into my face.你拿飞机爆了我的头255--You must have moved. I told you to stay still.肯定是你动了我说了不许动的256--- I didn't move. - Try not to talk.-人家才没动-闭嘴257--I want to make sure nothing's broken.我先检查一下飞机有没有坏258--Alex and I can't just disagree.我跟艾丽克斯不止是意见不能统一259--I mean, she has to turn everything into a fight.她还总能把事儿闹大260--Hmm. A strong, independent woman.独立的女强人嘛261--Sounds like somebody else I know.听上去跟我认识的另外一个人一样262--I was never hostile though.但我从来都没有恶意263--I mean, this whole thing with the dress-我的意思是关于穿裙子的问题264--Never had this problem with Haley.海莉可从来不这样265--Maybe Alex doesn't want to compete with her big sister.也许艾丽克斯只是不想被拿来跟她姐比266--Maybe she's trying to create her own identity.或许她只是想做独一无二的自己267--Put her in a dress, and she disappears.一旦她穿上裙子她的独特之处就消失了268--For one afternoon?就一下午都不行吗269--I wouldn't give up being myself for even one second.要让我放弃做自己哪怕一秒钟都不行270--Sometimes it's hard to remember you're only 10 years old.有时候真不敢相信你才10岁271--- And three-quarters. - Yeah.-10岁零9个月-好吧272--Hey, it's Mitchell. Do you guys eat olives?我是米奇尔你们要吃橄榄吗273--Olives?橄榄吗274--- Really good olives? - Yeah.-特棒的橄榄要吗-好啊275--You got it.那我给你带了啊276--Mitchell, I found the diapers. They're over here.米奇尔我找到尿布在哪了就在那277--Cameron, guess what I found?卡梅隆你猜猜我发现到什么了278--Coffins.棺材279--They sell baby formula and they sell coffins.他们既卖婴幼儿奶粉又卖棺材280--You can buy literally buy你简直可以买到281--everything you need from birth to death.从你出生到去世需要用到的一切东西282--Oh, my God. Look at these diapers.苍天大地啊看看这些尿布283--Look how cheap they are!真便宜284--Oh. You know what we should do?你知道我们应该怎么做吗285--We should get enough for the next year or two, right?我们应该买够一两年用的对不286--Where would we keep them?那我们把它放哪呢287--- They sell sheds. - Really?-他们正好也卖棚子嘛-真的吗288--You want to buy a diaper shed?你真要买个堆放尿布的棚吗289--We're those guys now? The guys with a diaper shed?我们要变成家里盖有尿布棚的家伙了对吗290--Just grab two more.再拿两包291--I'm not grabbing two more, Mitchell.我才不要米奇尔292--It's time to go.我们该走了293--Come on, come on. We need, uh- Hey, excuse me.淡定嘛我们得...不好意思294--- where Did you get that flatbed thing? - Over there.-你从哪找的平板车-就在那边295--- go grab one of those. - Really?-我们也去弄一辆-不是吧你296--Yeah. Get two.当然了两辆才够297--I'm in the applesauce aisle.我在苹果酱那排等你298--So, anyways, 不管怎么说299--after charades, we went out for coffee.猜字谜游戏之后我们一起去喝咖啡了300--And I learned that he loves art.然后我了解到他喜欢艺术301--He plays the piano. He speaks French.他会弹钢琴还会说法语302--- Un peu. - you see?-略懂-听见没303--I-I misjudged him.我对他的第一印象完全不靠谱304--Yeah, I'm sort of like Costco.没错我就跟好市多卖场一样305--I'm big, I'm not fancy, and I dare you to not like me.我身躯庞大土里土气但引人迷恋306--Yeah, and I'm kinda more like that, um-没错而我就更像是那个...307--What is the name of that little shop we went to in Paris?我们在巴黎逛的那个小店叫什么来着308--You are such a snob.你个势利小人309--Casablanca.卡萨布兰卡310--I have a small flower on my ankle...我脚脖子上纹了朵小花311--and a tiny little butterfly on my... thigh.还纹了一只小蝴蝶在我的大腿上312--How high up?大腿根部吗313--- Pretty high. - Did you do it To look sexy?-靠近"中心地带" -你是为了性感才纹的吗314--No- - Did you do it for a guy? Does Grandpa like it?不你是为男人纹的吗我外公喜欢吗315--No, no and yes.否否是316--That's gross恶心317--- Let's go back to your piercings. - No, no, no.-继续说说你的耳洞吧-才不要318--I've answered enough of your questions.我回答了这么多问题319--Now it's your turn to answer one.现在轮到你来回答一个了320--What is it?什么问题321--Why you don't want to wear a dress?你为什么不想穿裙子322--Because I don't want to look like Haley and her stupid friends.因为我不想穿得像海莉和她那帮蠢伴一样323--I wear dresses and I don't look like Haley.我也穿裙子我也不像海莉啊324--You are Haley, just 40 years older.你就是海莉40年后的版本325--- Ten. - Twenty.-10年后的-20年后的326--Deal. Alex, why are you fighting me on this?好吧艾丽克斯这你也要跟我吵吗327--Just- It doesn't matter if I dress up.其实穿裙子也没什么大不了的328--I'm not pretty like Haley and you.只是我没有你跟海莉那么漂亮329--- That's ridiculous! You're beautiful. - I'm not.-胡扯你美翻了-才不是330--But that's okay. I'm the smart one.不过没关系我聪明过人331--The cute busboy doesn't know that you're smart.那个帅哥服务员可不知道你的智商多高332--What?什么333--He's been smiling at you every time he comes to the table.他每次过来续杯都冲你微笑示意334--He does not!才没有335--Why do you think we are the only people with bread?要不然你以为他为何就给我们上了面包呢336--Look. One day you're going to want to date a cute guy like that.听着有一天你也会想跟那样的帅小伙约会337--And when that day comes, you're going to want to look beautiful,等到那时候你也会希望自己光彩动人338--and then you'll wear a dress.那时你就会穿裙子了339--So, you ever kiss another girl?那你亲过女生吗340--That's no way to talk to your grandmother.跟外婆可不能这么说话341--Was my mom hard on me growing up? 我成长过程中我妈对我严苛吗342--Yeah, she was.是绝对是343--But you know what? Back then但是你知道吗当时344--everything was Betty Friedan and Gloria Steinem.贝蒂·弗莱顿和格洛莉亚·斯坦正火着呢345--They didn't understand-她们都不明白...346--- Hola! We're back. - Hello.-我们回来了哟-好啊347--- Hey, how'd it go? - It was great.-逛得咋样啊-非常棒348--- Did you have fun with Luke? - Well, not--你跟卢克玩得开心吗-这个嘛349--We had a great time.我们姐弟俩谈得很开心350--Alex, I've been thinking, and...艾丽克斯我想过了351--if you don't want to wear a dress to the wedding,你不想穿裙子参加婚礼352--it's not the end of the world.也没什么大不了的353--It's all right. I bought one.没关系我买了一条354--Do you see how she has to provoke me?现在你看到她是怎么气我的了吗355--We'll talk about it next week.我们下周再聊这个话题356--Claire!克莱尔357--Clear the way. Coming through. Ow!让开道进来358--Coming through. Easy. Easy, fella. Ow!小心点注意伙计359--- I need to rest my face. - You're fine.-我的脸得好好歇歇了-你没事的360--You'll be all right. Hang on.你会没事的坚持住361--- Oh, my God! - Get the door.-老天啊-进家门了362--Ah! Dad?爸363--Little accident. Nothing big.小事故没啥大不了的364--- I was in a plane crash. - What happened?-是飞机失事啦-发生什么事了365--We were threading the needle, and somebody moved.我们正在玩穿针引线那一招有人动了366--No, I didn't. You did it on purpose.哪有人家才没有你是故意的367--That's the painkiller talking.他吃了止痛药说胡话呢368--He's a little loopy.他有点晕乎乎的369--- How bad is it? - Well, the wing is cracked,-到底有多严重-机翼裂了370--- the propeller's bent, but I can- I can- - I mean Phil.-螺旋桨也折了但我-我指菲尔371--- I was in a plane crash. - Thanks, Dad.-飞机失事了-真"谢谢"你了爸372--I didn't ask him to be there. He insisted.我又没让他站那他非得去373--He took a chance. This is what happened.他非要冒险就这样而已374--Kind of like the time you ran over his foot.就像你上次开车轧他脚一样375--You ran over his foot?你轧过他的脚吗376--- that was an accident. - you know, Dad, you Did it on purpose.-意外而已-爸你明明是故意的377--We all saw the tire marks on the lawn.我们都看到草坪上的轮胎印了378--I had just quit smoking.我那会儿刚戒烟嘛379--See, you're upsetting your husband.瞧你说得你老公心烦意乱了380--- Water. - I'll get it.-水-我去拿381--Ay. You okay?你还好吧382--Gloria! Thank God you're here.歌洛莉亚谢谢老天爷你在这383--Don't worry. I'm here too.别担心我也在这儿384--Who's this?你是谁啊385--Wasn't my fault.不是我的错386--I have seen you thread the needle a million times.我见你玩过无数次"穿针引线"那一招387--You never miss.你从来没失过手388--Yeah. I must be getting old.没错我大概是宝刀已老389--Why don't you just admit it? You never liked Phil.你为什么就不愿承认呢你不喜欢菲尔390--Put that down. You do not get a cookie.放下才不给你吃曲奇饼呢391--I like Phil.我喜欢菲尔392--It's just that sometimes he tries too hard, you know?只是有时他有点太刻意讨好我了你懂吗393--And it's just kind of- irritating.实在有点惹人生气394--Okay, maybe he tries too hard好吧也许他过于刻意讨好395--because you make zero effort with him.因为你从来不主动和他亲近396--You know what? In the 16 years that we've been married,你知道吗在我跟他结婚的16年里397--have you one time told him that you liked him?你有跟他说过一次你喜欢他吗398--- not in those exact words, No. - No.-我只是没明确说"喜欢"二字嘛-才不是399--Not in any words, Dad. 你什么都没说过爸400--How do you think that makes me feel?你知道那让我心里多难过吗401--You've never told your son that you love him?你从没告诉过你的孩子你爱他吗402--Whoa, whoa. When did we jump to love?等等等等什么时候上升到爱的高度了403--And he's technically not my son.而且准确地说他又不是我的孩子404--- Ah. So that means that you don't love Manny either? - Sure, I do.-那就是说你也不爱曼尼吗-当然爱405--I mean, believe me, when I was in that park,相信我当我刚刚在公园玩飞机时406--I really wished Manny was there.我真希望曼尼跟我一起407--For what?为什么408--So that you could fly the plane into his head? Huh?那样你就可以用飞机爆他头了是吗409--Dad, thanks so much for bringing Phil home.爸多谢你能把菲尔送回家410--I found one of your little flaps in his hair. So-我在他头发里发现了你机翼的碎片411--Actually, this is called an aileron.实际上这是副翼的碎片412--- It controls... - because that's what matters right now.-用来保持...-现在重要的是菲尔才对吧413--Bye, Dad.爸请你离开414--- Hey, Phil. - Jay.-菲尔-杰415--What are you, made of china?你是陶瓷做的吗416--Phil, I just want you to know I'm sorry.菲尔我只想让你明白我的歉意417--And whether I, uh, missed or you moved-不管是因为我失手了还是你动了418--- I didn't. - either way.-我才没动-都好419--I just want to say that I like you.我只想让你知道我喜欢你420--- Really? - Yeah.-真的吗-必须的421--What do you like about me?那你能说说喜欢人家什么地方吗422--You're a nice guy.你是个好人423--Try real hard.非常努力424--I do.没错425--And you're a good dad.你还是个好父亲426--Hey, I'm a good dad. Come here.我是个好父亲快来427--Come here, you.让我熊抱一个428--This feels so right.感觉真棒429--What's going on?什么情况430--There was a little accident,发生了一点小意外431--but Jay's telling Phil how much he loves him.不过杰在对菲尔表明爱意432--Oh. Well, that's nice for Phil.好吧菲尔走运了433--That's great,真好434--since he's never said anything like that to my boyfriend.他可从来没对我男人表现过爱意呢435--- Let it go. - No, it's not okay.-别提了-不行我气不过436--No, Mitch is right. Go in there too, Cam. Come on.不米奇说的对小卡你也去抱抱437--You're kidding.开什么玩笑438--- Jay! - I'm gonna get this.-杰-我来吧439--- Come on in, Cam. - Just a little hug.-来吧小卡-就抱一小下。

Ok your brother's lunch is packed 好了你弟弟的午餐装好了you're buying your own lunch 你自己买午餐吃Luke Alex 下来啦要走啦Here we go. Last chance for the summer handshake 来最后一次夏日式拍手咯Dad?爸爸Come on, we're only halfway done. 喂我们才做到一半耶I need help. 我需要帮助I was supposed to keep a journal all summer. 暑假的时候我得每天写日记的It's due today. 今天就要交了Wow,first day of school,and you're already behind? 哇第一天上学就要欠作业啦?I'm dead. 我死定了All right,tell me how far you've gotten. 好吧你还落下多少?Okay. 好吧"June 21st --found a stick." "6月21日捡到一根棍子"June 22nd..." "6月22日..."That's it. 没了That's it? 就这样?It was a really cool stick. 那棍子还真的蛮棒的He's right. It looked like a snake. 是啊看起来就像一条蛇Getting everybody out of the house in the morning can be really tough, 让大家早上出门是件很难的事Especially the first day of school.尤其是开学第一天From the minute we get up at 7:00 打从我们7点起床Till we drop them off at school, 到送他们上学It is go,go,go. 就一直没停过I get up at 6:00. 我6点就起来了I get up at 5:00. 我还5点就起床了呢Seriously, I get up at 6:00. 说真的我6点起来的That's you? I th-- I thought we had a raccoon. 那是你? 我还以为是只浣熊I can't believe my littlboy is going into the fifth grade. 想不到偶滴宝贝儿子都上五年级了He used to hold my finger with his little hand 他以前总是用小手抓住偶滴手指And look at me with those big eyes. 用大大滴眼睛看着我Yep,they grow up. 我滴小宝贝(Gloria说鸟语) 是啊他长大了Come on,manny, let's get going! 来Manny 我们出发咯!How's my hair? 我的发型怎么样?Hold on. 慢着What are you wearing there? 你穿的是什么呀That looks like an old christmas tree skirt. 就像旧圣诞树罩一样It's a traditional colombian poncho. 这是件传统的哥伦比亚斗篷I want my new classmates to know I'm proud of my heritage. 我要让新同学知道我对传统文化多么自豪I think you look very handsome,lindo. 我觉得你帅呆了呢小可爱Oh,really? 噢是吗?Am I driving him to school,or is he gonna ride his burro? 是要我载他还是他自己骑驴去学校? you are a cutie-pie, yes,you are 你是个迷人派迷啊迷人派you are a cutie-pie 你是个迷人派Are you still baby-proofing? 你还在加装保护套?Everything we own is pointy. 咱这所有家具都有棱角耶Why is our daughter dressed like donna summer? 为什么咱家女儿穿得跟Donna Summer一样?She is not donna summer. 她不是Donna SummerClearly,she'sdiana ross from the rca years. 她是"黄金岁月"里的Diana Ross啊How is daddy not seeing that? 为什么爸爸看不出来呢?I really thought you were done with this. 我还以为你已经玩厌了呢I made no such promises. 我可没这么说过I guess I'm somewhat of a shutterbug,um, 我也算是个摄影一族吧And my new favorite model, of course,is lily. 我最爱的猫豆当然是Lily咯Honey,you moving out? 亲爱的你要搬出去?Five more years.再过5年吧A little help here?来帮忙啊This is why we suggested the violin. 这就是为什么我们建议你选小提琴The cello is more in demand in university orchestras. 大学管弦乐团更需要大提琴手You know what's not in demand? Oh,what? 你知道他们不需要什么吗? 什么?Girls who play in university orchestras.在大学管弦乐团的女生Here,I'll help you carry it out to the curb. 来我帮你拿到搭车的地儿Phil, put on some pants. Phil 穿条裤子Come on,this covers up more than my bathing suit. 这个还没泳衣暴露Yeah, don't reminde. 别提那个了Haley,honey,don't forget the driving instructor Haley 宝贝别忘了Is picking you up from school.驾车教练会去学校接你Can't he pick me up someplace else? 就不能在别的地方接我吗I don't want kids at school thinking I'm dating 我可不想让我同学认为A 40-year-old driving instructor who's not even cute.我在跟个40岁又不帅的驾车教练约会Haley just got her learner's permit Haley刚拿到了学车许可证We've been taking turns driving with her. 我们轮流陪她开车One of the really standard rules of the road 有这么条很重要的路上规则Is we want to keep a safe distance 我们得和前面的车Between us and the car in front of it, 保持安全距离And that is not safe right there -- not safe. 这可不安全不安全呐All right.好的Okay,merge. 变线I --merge. 我... 变线Mom merge! 妈变线!Merge,merge, merge,merge,merge! 变线变线变线!Stop it! You're freaking me out! 别叫啦! 我就要崩溃啦!This navigation system's all messed up. 这导航系统坏掉了吧It thinks we'rin a park. 上面显示我们在公园里Oh,my god, it is a park! 额滴神我们真在公园里!Away from the kids!Where do I go?! Aim for the lake! 绕开小孩!The lake?! Aim for the lake! 我要朝哪里开啊啊啊! 转到湖那边Makes you realize we're all just hanging by a thread. 咱真是命悬一线啊The last thing manny needs on his first day of school Manny最不想要滴就是开学第一天Is you under-melting his confidence. 被你酱紫融掉自信心Undermining. Now u're doing it to me,too. 是打击瞧你对我也酱紫I'm sorry, but there's only two places 对不起但能穿斗篷的地方就两个Niagara falls and log rides. 尼加拉瓜大瀑布和激流勇进You think too much about these things. 你想太多了啦I wear all sort of daring outfits all the time, 我一直很敢穿那些衣服啊And people admire them because I wear them with the confidence. 因为我穿出了自信大家都很葱白I'm sure it's the confidence they're admiring. 是啊男淫们都是奔你自信来的I just... 我只是...I just think it's a little over-the-top. 只是觉得有点儿过了You know what? You need to loosen up and have fun. 你该放松放松寻寻开心了I am loose. I'm fun. 我很放松啊我也很开心啊Remember? 记得吗?Breakfast for dinner last week -- my idea.上礼拜正餐吃早饭我的主意Ever since we brought lily home, you've been tense. 自从把Lily带回家你就紧张兮兮的All you do is put child locks on things,read parenting books. 你到处都上了小锁还整天看育婴书Would you please stop and -- 你就不能停下来...Here -- just hold your daughter. 来抱抱你女儿呗Hold her and relax. 抱抱她放轻松All right,sweetheart. Come on. 好的Just relax. Oh,sweetheart. 放松就好哦小亲亲Did you put hair spray on this? 你给她抹发胶了?Just a little bit,yes. 嗯就一点点I'm gonna put some music on.No,cam, I have to go to work. 我去放点音乐不行啊Cam 我还要去上班呢Dance with her! I don't have time for this. 和她跳跳舞! 我真的没有时间Put a little boogie in it. 我放布吉乐了哦oh,come on. 饶了我吧Just dance. You know you love this song. 跳舞就好啦你超爱这首歌的This is actually a really good song. 的确是首好歌All right. Okay. 好吧Who's the dancing queen, huh? 谁是舞后啊?Put a little boogie in it. I don't have time. 摇一下摆一下See? Fun,right? 看见没好玩吧?Oh,my -- was that her head? 噢偶滴...撞到头了吗?No,I think if it was her head, she would be -- 不是吧如果是撞到头她应该会...Yeah, that was her head. 好吧是撞到头了Okay,okay. 没事的没事的Mitchell: Yes,I know. 我知道的I got boo-boo bear from the freezer. 我把冰箱里的瑜伽熊拿过来Why do you have chocolate on your face? 为什么你脸上沾了巧克力?It was under a pie. 它被压在一个派底下So you ate your way to it? 所以你边吃边把熊熊救出来的?I made a judgment call. You weren't there! 你又不在那我得见机行事Do you think she's all right? 她没事吧?She didn't cry that much. 她哭得也不是很厉害啦M-maybe that's a bad sign. You know... 可能不是个好兆头啊We should try and make her laugh. 我们该试着逗她笑Why? 'cause that's how we'll know she's okay. 为什么? 这样我们才知道她没事啊Where's,um... Where's doggy? 狗狗在哪里Doggy,doggy. 狗狗狗狗Here,doggy. 狗狗在这儿Okay,there you go. 好的But it's a dog. 这是条狗耶Yeah,I know. That's why it's funny. 我知道啊这样才搞笑嘛Moo! I don't think it's as funny as you think it is. 哞! 没你说的那么搞吧Can we please just call your sister? No,no. 我们打电话给你姐吧不行Cam,cam,why,so she can be all judgmental and condescending, Cam Cam你在给她机会让她居高临下地批判我Like she's the expert and I don't know how to take care of a baby? 就像她是个专家而我是个育儿白痴Mitchell, she is your family. Mitchell 她是你家人耶Of course she's gonna be judgmental and condescending. 当然啦她会居高临下地批判你Hello? 喂?Uh,not a big deal,just wondering -- 呃也没什么事就想问问...When your kids were small, did you ever... 你的孩子小的时候有没有把...I don't know,uh, smack their heads into a wall? 把他们头撞到墙上?Usually, we just gave time-outs. 一般我只是叫他们闭门思过而已No,no. Accidentally.不是那样的是意外Um,we -- we just kind of bonked lily's head, 我不小心把Lily的头撞墙上了And she -- it really wasn't very hard, 也不是特别重And she's not acting any differently, 她没怎么哭也没什么异样But I just worry -- relax. 但我就是担心... 放松It happens. 常有的事啦Luke used to bang his head all the time,and he's fine. Luke就经常撞头的啦他也没事Okay. All right,thank you. 好吧谢谢你Thanks. That helps. Okay,okay. 谢谢你帮大忙了We got to take her to the doctor. 一定要带去给医生看看Load up the car. 去把车开出来I'm here. 我在这里I,uh,just dropped manny off at school, 我刚把Manny送去学校了And I realized... 然后我意识到...I just dropped manny off at school. 我把Manny送去学校了Oh,boy. 唉就开始了And I was hoping we'd still have a few more good years 我还期待着在我们感慨时光花花流走前Before the mind started to go.还能好好过上几年呢No,what I'm saying... 不我想说的是...We have the day to ourselves for the first time in months. 几个月以来我们第一次能二人世界We should take advantage of it -- 我们应该好好把握Go to the club... 去下俱乐部...Nice lunch... 吃顿午餐...Some massages. 做个按摩...What about work? 工作咋办?I'm the boss. 我是老总嘛Since I married you, people are surprised I come in at all. 自从娶了你我去上班他们都觉得惊讶Jay's very spontaneous. Jay真滴是信手拈来He's always surprising me with little presents, 他总是有小惊喜给我小礼物呐Fun getaways.欢乐小出游啦I wasn't the greatest husband the first time around, 第一次结婚老公没做好But I'm trying to do better this time. 我这一次要做更好And maybe by my third marriage, I'll have it down pat. 等到我第三次婚姻我就炉火纯青了Yeah,that one's gonna cost me. 呃这下要大出血了Whatcha reading there, a book?你在看啥呀什么书?Yeah,I've been meaning to get to it for a while. 是啊我想读它很久了Oh,it's got a map at the beginning. 开头有张地图耶I like it when books do that. 我就喜欢这样的书Do you have an open house this morning? 你今天早上不是要展房吗?I rescheduled. 我改时间了Thought you might like some company. 我想你可能要人陪呀Well,the first day of school can be tough 开学第一天For stay-at-home moms.对全职妈妈来说怪难受的吧Now,you have to understand-- the kids are gone, 要知道孩子不在家The nest is empty, they are rudderless. 家里变得空虚主妇们没了盼头And a lot of guys wouldn't even notice. 大多数男人甚至都不会注意But I'm not a lot of guys. 但我不是那些人I listen with my mind,and if you pay attention, 我很用心聆听你要是细心一点Women will tell you what they want 就会发现女人会用相反的话By telling you the opposite of what they want. 告诉你她们想要什么Like,the other day, claire was like, 就像那天Claire说"you have to move your car. "你得挪下你的车There's no space in the garage for both of our cars." "车库不够放咱们两辆车的"And what she's really saying is that,you know, 你知道其实她想说啥吗I should probably get a sports car. 我该换一台运动型车了I was sort of looking forward to a quiet day. 我想要清净的一天Thought I'd just read, maybe...Go for a run later. 看看书跑跑步That's it. 就这样Great. We'll run together. 好啊咱们可以一起跑You don't have to do that. 你不必这样子啊Know. 我知道Listening.这就是聆听The thing is, I like to run alone, 其实呢我比较喜欢一个人跑And I run kind of fast, so... 而且我跑比较快嘛所以...So... 所以...So,I'm not sure 我不知道You're gonna be able to keep up with me. 你能不能跟上我的步伐You're k-- you're kidding,right? No. 你在开...玩笑吧? 没有You really think I can't keep up with you? 你真的以为我跟不上你?I'm not sure you can keep up with this conversation. 我都不认为你能跟上我的话茬I think you're forgetting that I power-walk every morning 你忘了我每天早上都健走吧?And that I wear my special ses with the big soles, 穿着我那独有的高跟健步鞋Which were designed by a doctor.某名医设计的Yes,I know. 我知道But I run... Every day.但我每天都跑步You really think you can run as fast as me? 你真以为你跑得和我一样快?No,phil,I think I can run much,much faster... 不Phil 我觉得我比你跑得......Than you. ...快很多Boom.砰Just like that, the whole day changed. 就这样一整天都变了It was game on. 比赛开始了She knew it. I knew it. We both knew it. 她知道我知道我们都知道I just want to read. 我就是想读读书啊I think I'll order what I had the last time. 我想点上次吃的东西What was that called? 那个叫什么?You just want me to say it because you want me to roll my r's. 你让我回答就是想看看我转眼睛吧Come on!reuben. 说嘛鲁宾Jay,what is this? Jay 这是啥米?Oh,looks like my old car cover. 看上去是我的旧车罩啊Don't give me that.This is manny's poncho. 别打马虎眼这是Manny的斗篷What is it doing here? 为什么会在这里?Maybe he decided to take it off on the way to school. 八成是去学校的路上他决定脱下来了What did you say to him? Nothing.你给他灌输什么了? 什么也没有啊I told some jokes. 就开了点玩笑而已You said plenty with your jokes. 你肯定说了很多Jay,he looks up to you. Jay 他很尊重你He respects your opinion. 他尊重你滴看法We dodged a bullet on this, trust me. 这样我们才不会有大麻烦相信我I've been down this road before. 我以前也碰到过类似的问题I remember one time mitchell decided to wear 那时候Mitchell想戴花格围巾上学I kept my mouth shut. 我没说他He got his jaunty butt kicked. 他的花屁股就被惨踢了My dad has this perception that I was very flamboyant as a kid, 我爸爸总觉得我小时候就很娘Which is just-- it's nonsense, 纯属胡扯Because I kept the whole gay thing very under wraps. 因为我把身份埋藏的很深You know, I was just a guy's guy. 我整个一男生中的男生I-I was basically a jock. 都可以算作运动员了You know? 知道不?So,we should crush manny's spirit 看来偶们就该摧残他滴信念And destroy everything that makes him who he is. 毁去他滴本性I'm just sing, it's no fun 我只是想说看到儿子每天被踢to see your kid get picked on every day, 十分让人恼火Getting tormented just because he's different.因为他与众不同就总是被人摧残Now,I'm telling you,it rips your heart out. 我跟你说这真的让人心痛死了Well,batman doesn't get picked on,and he wears a cape. 蝙蝠侠不会被找茬吧他还穿披风啊A poncho is just a cape that goes all the way around. 斗篷不就是把披风围起来嘛Batman doesn't get picked on because he's a muscular genius. 蝙蝠侠不会被找茬因为他是肌肉天才Manny can't make it to the top bunk. Manny又不是什么超级英雄We're taking this poncho to manny at school. 偶们要把这件斗篷带去给MannyIt's important that he knows that we support him. 要让他知道偶们是支持他的And then we go get those massages. 然后偶们才去按摩I always take the stairs two at a time. 我总是一步踏两级I don't even think about it anymore. 想都不用想The regular way would seem weird. 一步步走太奇怪了Phil,let it go. I'm faster than you. Phil 没用的我就是比你快If only there was some way we could settle this 我们找个方法给这事下个定论吧Once and for all, but how?怎样做才好呢?You seriously want to race me? 你真想和我赛跑?I ran a half marathon last year. 我去年还跑了半程马拉松呢Wow. I'm half scared. 我还半怕怕呢Okay, we do need to do this. 好那来吧I'll go change. 我去换衣服Not now. I got a conference call. 别现在啊我有个电话会议But how about after that?开完会怎么样?Great.This afternoon.好今天下午Sweet! 好!Two at a time, two at a time,two at a -- 一次两阶一次两阶一次两...Son of a gun, got to fix that step. 王八蛋这台阶要修了Two at a time, already at the top,so... 一次两阶不好意思就到顶了Hi. I'm dr. Miura. 嗨我是Miura医生I'm on call today. 我今天值班Looks like we have a little head bump.看起来有个撞头事件Yeah,it happened a couple hours ago on a doorjamb. 是啊两小时前撞到了门框上Oh,ouch. 哎哟We used to do this thing in school 在学校时我们曾学过这个Where they would give you an egg, 他们给你个鸡蛋And you -- youknow,you couldn't break it. 你不能打烂它And it was supposed to teach you how hard it was to be a parent. 这是教我们做父母有多么艰难But... 但是...The real thing,it's --it's -- it's so much harder. 真有了才发现要难很多很多Went through a dozen eggs.用掉了一打鸡蛋Yeah,well, he's a nervous eater. 呃他一紧张就猛吃的No,I broke a dozen eggs. Oh. 不是我打碎了一打鸡蛋这样啊I'm sorry. I just assumed that -- 对不起我刚以为...I know. 我知道I know what you assumed. 我知道你在想什么There doesn't seem to be any mark. 看不到有什么伤痕Well,her head was... Somewhat protected. 呃她头有东西保护着Protected? 保护?Was she wearing a hat? 她戴着帽子么?Yes,yes. It was like a hat. 是啊算是顶帽子吧It was a wig. 是顶假发Actually,sort of a ghetto-fabulous afro thing. 一顶非洲爆炸假发I thought it might be medically relevant. 我怕会有什么医学上的联系嘛Really?是吗?You thought "ghetto-fabulous" might be medically relevant? 你觉得"爆炸头"会有医学上的联系?Maybe I should just finish with the exam? 让我先检查完吧Yes. Thanks. 嗯谢谢You'll be pleased to know 我想你知道的话会很高兴的That mitchell and I intend on raising lily Mitchell和我打算With influences from her asian heritage. 用亚洲传统来养育LilyThat is fantastic. 不错嘛Have you noticed any vomiting since the head bump? 她撞头后吐过吗?Uh,no. No,no. 没有We've hung some art in her room, some asian art, 我们在她房间挂了些东方艺术品And then when she's ready for solid food, 等她能吃固体食物了There is a fantastic pho place 我们屋转角的地儿Right around the corner from our house.有家超好的"福"店Am I pronouncing that right? 我说对了吗?Is it "pho"? 是读"福"吗It's a soup. 是一种汤I don't know. 我不知道I'm from denver. 我来自丹佛We don't have a lot of...Pho there. 那儿可没有"福"什么的Just to be sure, 确认一下Could you show me how hard lily got hit? 你能给我看看Lily是怎么撞到的吗?And u-- use your head. 就用你的头吧Oh,yeah,so,I mean, really,it was... 好It was just sort of like,um... 就像这样...Could I see that again? 我能再看一次吗?Um,it was just -- just a head bump,you know? 就是撞了下头How are you feeling? 你感觉怎样?Uh,fine. 没事啊So is lily. Lily也一样的Babies are designed to survive new parents. 宝宝能很好地适应新家长的So stop worrying. You guys are doing great. 别担心了你们做得很好呢Thank you. 谢谢你Denver. 我是丹佛人I don't see any ponchos, 我看不到有人穿斗篷啊Which means either the kids don't wear them 说明要么他们根本不穿or the ones who do wear them disappear. 要么穿的人都神秘消失了We're doing the right thing. 我们做的是对滴I support manny no matter what. 我无条件支持Mannychildren need to know that you believe in them. 要让孩子们知道你信任他们It's the most important thing. 这是最紧要滴If you tell them they have wings, 你要告诉他们有翅膀They will believe they can fly. 他们就会相信自己能一灰冲天Oh,really? 哦是吗?I had a buddy went to woodstock, 我有个兄弟去了伍德斯托克音乐节Believed he could fly-- didn't end great. 他觉得自己能飞啊但下场可不咋地It's why hotel windows don't open anymore. 所以后来酒店的窗户通通不准开了Is something wrong? Who's died? 怎么啦? 谁死啦?No one,manny. 没人死MannyWhy would you even think that? 为什么你会这样想啊?In colombia,manny went to pabloescobar elementary school. 在哥伦比亚Manny上埃斯科瓦尔小学If you were pulled out of class, 如果你上课时被抓出来It was definitely to identify a body. 肯定是要去认尸了Well,we got your poncho here. 我们把你的斗篷带来了I thought you said it made me look like 你不是说那样让我看起来my neck was wearing a dress. 像是脖子上围了条裙子That was a joke. 我开玩笑嘛Oh,good it's still in the pocket. 太好了它还在口袋里What do you got there, buddy? 里面有什么啊小伙计?My pan flute.我的排箫I'm going to play some colombian folk music 我想要给我的新同学for my new classmates. 表演哥伦比亚民俗音乐Huh. Great.真棒啊I've never been more proud of you. 我真为你骄傲I'm sure your friends are gonna love it. 我肯定你的朋友都会喜欢滴Break the flute. What? 毁了那排箫什么?The poncho by itself is fine. 光穿斗篷没关系The poncho plus the flute plus the stupid dance -- 斗篷加上排箫再加上那笨拙的排舞Oh,geez, look at that!天掉了!And now you stepped on it! What?你竟然还踩到它了! 什么?Oh,darn! Wh-what's wrong with me?!天呐我干了啥啊?!Here,let me get it.来我来开门Thank you.谢谢You know what,actually,maybe you should do this.我觉得还是你来吧Why? I-I don't want to bump her head against the door,为什么? 我不想再把她的头撞到门上You know, pinch her with the seat belt.又或是绑安全带时夹到她Mitchell,how long are you gonna beat yourself up over one mistake?Mitchell 你还要责备自己多久?Is this gonna be like the bld highlights all over again?上次"金发闪光"事件又要重演么?I just...我只是...I think I suck at being a father.觉得我这爸爸做得很失败What are you talking about?你在说什么呢?We're new at this.我们都是新手Yeah,but you're such a natural.对啊但你就像与生俱来一样I mean,look at you.看看你You walk into the room, and she lights up.你一走进房间她就会很开心You -- you change her diaper with one hand.你一只手就能换尿布I --nice.我...好吧I'm actually jealous of you.我都嫉妒你了There are so many things that you do that I can't.你也做了那么多啊You -- you baby-proofed the entire house.整个房子都被你做了防护措施You took care of all the adoption paperwork.法律的文件都是你在操劳Without you,we wouldn't even have a baby to injure.没有你我们连个会受伤的宝宝都没有Just a couple of forms.就几个表格而已Actually, that was a lot of paperwork.事实上那的确是一堆文件And you got her on all those preschool waiting lists.你还让她挤进了所有幼儿园的候选名单I can't believe you were gonna wait until she was old enough.你还想等到她适龄那时怎么可能还有You see,that's what makes us a great team.看咱们现在组成了一个伟大的团队We each have our own strengths.我们各有所长Now... 现在Who are amazing parents? 谁是超赞老爸?We are. I can't hear you. 我们我听不到哦We are! 我们!Don't you forget it. Okay. 别忘记说过的话哦好啦Did we just lock our baby in the car? 我们是把宝宝锁车里了吗?Did you put the keys in the bag?! 你把钥匙放包包里了吗?I put the keys in the bag.That's what we always -- 是啊我们总是...Oh,mitchell,I told you not to put the keys in the bag! Mitchell 我说过别把钥匙放包包里!Don't freak out. Come on,don't freak out! 别慌啊Lily,it's okay! Lily 没事的哦!What, are you singing to her? 你在对她唱歌?People get arrested for this,mitchell!We have to keep her calm. 人们会因为这个被捕的Mitchell! 要让她保持平静啊Do all four doors lock?!Do you have a phone?! 4扇门都锁上了吗? 你电话在身上吗? what? 你说什么?I didn't say anything. 我什么也没说I couldn't hear you. I'm cranking one of my mash-ups. 说了我也听不到我在听混搭专辑There they are. 回来啦How was the first day back in prison? 重回监狱的第一天如何啊?Fine. Yeah. 还不错嗯What are youuys doing? 你们在干什么?Your mom and I are racing to the mailbox on sequoia and back. 你妈和我要赛跑到红杉那儿的信箱然后跑回来Why? 为什么?I don't know. Oh,she knows. 我不知道她当然知道Hey,buddy,as soon as I'm done kicking a little mom butt here, 伙计等我赢了你老妈How about I school you in some mariokart? 训练下你的马里奥赛车如何?Can't.Got to work on my journal.不行要补日记Lame! 没意思!Hey,uh,alex,you? Alex 你呢?I have a history paper. 我有历史作业呢Well,if you want see a little history 那如果你想见证历史诞生...Being made right here -- not really. 没兴趣Okay. 好吧Ready? 准备好没?Are you? I was born ready. 你呢? 早好了I came out of the womb wearing tiny,little,golden... 打从娘胎出来我就有金色的小...Go! ...Wings. 开始! ...翅膀I'm breaking the window! 我来打碎车窗Trina: Emergency assistance. This is trina. 应急援助中心Trina为你服务Help! We locked our baby in the car,and people are judging us! 救命啊! 我们把宝宝锁车里了大家都在送我们白眼呢!I swear to god, I'm gonna break it! 对天发誓我要打破它!Do not break the window!You'll get glass on her! 别! 玻璃会打到她的!Sir,please tell your wife to relax. 先生让你老婆冷静Everything is going to be okay. 会没事的That's a man. Really?那是个男人真的?Don't worry,lily!Lily,daddy's coming for you! 别慌哦Lily! 爹地来救你!Sir,we just sent the signal. 先生我们刚刚发出了信号The door should be unlocked now. 车门应该解锁了Check --check the door. 开下门Check the door, check the door. 开下门快点It's not unlocked! 没有开啊!Okay. 好了That is amazing. 真棒啊How did they do that? 他们怎么做到的?I don't know.It's just -- 我不知道真是...We got it. Thank you.Did that come from space? 好了哦谢谢你难道是外太空来的吗?I run five miles a day. 我一天跑5英里I have a resting heart rate of 48. 我的静息心律为48次每分There is no way I'm going to lose a two-mile race 就跑个两英里没有可能我会输给那个To johnny ski pole.撑滑雪杆健走的家伙Just saving my energy... 我只是在保存体力Drafting off of you.马上就打败你You feeling cocky?你是不是很趾高气昂?Yeah,I am. 那当然I love it! 就喜欢你这样But after seeing that t-shirt, 看见那T恤之后I realized something. 我突然意识到The first day of school is tough on all my kids, 对我孩子来说第一天上学十分痛苦Especially the one I married. 特别是我嫁给的这位Boo booboop! 哔啵哔!Afterburners engaged! 内燃机开始启动!Don't choke on my smoke! 别被烟呛到哦!And down the stretch he goes! 最后的冲刺啦I don't believe it! 难以置信啊!Daddy wins! 爹地赢啦!Do you believe in miracles?! 相信奇迹吗?!U.S.A.!U.S.--Oh,no! 美国万岁! 美国...妈呀!Oh,geez! 额滴神Oh,my老天What was that?! Was that a person?! 那是啥?! 是个人吗?!I'm good! Dad?!我没事! 爸爸?!I'm good! 我没事!I'm good! Whoo! Are you okay? 亲爱的你没事吧? 我没事!You're getting better, sweetheart. 你开得好多了哦宝贝Did I lose the race to make him feel better? 我是不是故意输他让他感觉良好?Maybe.也许吧But it just seemed like he could use a win today. 不过他今天挺需要这场胜利的We do strange things for the people we love. 为我们爱的人我们做各种千奇百怪的事We lie to them. 我们对他们撒谎We lie for them. 我们为他们撒谎There may beome bumps along the way, 生活中都会有颠簸But we never stop wanting the best for them. 但我们总会为他们争取最好That's what makes it such a tough job... 这是世界上最难的工作了...But kind of the best job in the world. 但同时也是世上最好的工作What are you doing?! Keep your eyes on the road! 你在干嘛?!看路啊!Eyes on the road! Oh,my god! 看路啊! 老天爷!oKay. 这下好了All right,sweetie, this happens. 没事的宝贝这事儿时常发生Remain calm. That's the first thing. 不要慌Pull over right here. I'll get out the registration. 就停这吧我拿证件Mom,I don't like cops.Okay,pull over right there. 妈我不喜欢警察没事就停在这里I don't like cops. All right, there's a space right here. 我一点都不喜欢警察没事这儿有位置停这I can't pull over. No,I can't. 我不能停车绝对不停你得停车You need to pull over. 不行我不喜欢警察I can't pull over. I don't like cops. 爸爸赞同你不停你得停车Phil!I got priors. I'm speeding up. 我有先例我在加速了The parking ticket from the mall -- 刚才商场那要收停车费I never paid the parking ticket! 我从来都不交!Keep moving,sweetheart! 一直开吧甜心!Dad agrees with me-- I can speed up! 老爸同意了我能加速了!it's not a movie,haley! Pull over! 这不是在拍电影Haley 给我停下来!。

How could we don't have the same number of containers and lids?怎么盒子和盖子的数量不对应呢Why would they ever get separated? 它们怎么会分开呢Built-up resentment, money issues, 可能感情不和也可能经济问题met a younger lid. 还可能跟年轻的盖子跑了Mom, where's my science homework? 妈妈我的科学作业哪去了Uh, it's over there on the table. 就在那边的桌子上So, Alex, honey, what's going on? 艾丽克斯宝贝最近怎么样Anything exciting? 有啥新鲜事吗No. 没有- Any boys? - No. -有喜欢的男孩吗 -没有I'm feeling a little bit disconnected 我觉得我和艾丽克斯之间from Alex right now. 有代沟了Last week, I picked up her cellphone, 就在上周thinking it was mine. 我错拿了她的手机And I accidentally read a few flirty text messages 无意中看到几条暧昧短信that were probably from a boy in her class, 如果是她班上的某个男生干的which is fine. 那也就罢了Or they're from a drifter. 就怕是哪个混混发的Come on, isn't there something 来嘛你就真没啥you want to share with your mommers? 要告诉你"马马"的吗Yeah. Don't call yourself "Mommers." 有别自称"马马"He blew his lid when she tried to contain him. 盒子想上盖子盖子爆发了Okay. What do you think? 你觉得这件怎么样时间轴：向日葵的星后期&特效：WiLL 总监：君君爱爱翻译：扣扣大卫熊四月海东方 Vkvicky 校对：夏沫心时间轴：向日葵的星后期&特效：WiLL 总监：君君爱爱 ■-I like it. -But you don't love it. -我喜欢 -但不是特别喜欢No, I do. I love it. 谁说的我爱死它了- As much as you loved the other one? - Ooh. -和刚才那件比 -天Okay. Mm. 好吧The house is on fire. I only have time to grab one shirt. 房子着火了我只来得及拿一件衬衫Which one do I take? 我选谁The correct answer is take Lily. 带上莉莉才是正解After that. 那之后呢Uh, okay, the blue one. 好吧拿蓝色的那件Because the gray one washes me out. 因为我穿灰色的显胖No, no. Cam, you -- you can't go wrong here. 不不不别误会小卡Everything you've tried on looks great. 你不管穿什么都美翻了I love you in both of them. 两件都好搭你Oh, you're so nice to me. 还是你疼我Mitchell has a problem with public displays of affection. 米奇尔不喜欢在公众场合亲热Um, I remember once at a new year's eve party, 我记得有一年的新年派对上stroke of midnight, he high-fived me. 零点钟声一响他和我击掌庆祝Two problems with that -- 两个问题One, gays don't high-five. 首先同志不击掌Two, gays don't high-five. 其次同志不击掌I'm home! 我回来啦Mmm, what smells so good? 烧什么呢这么香I'm making chunchullo, a traditional Colombian dish, 我在做圈圈肉哥伦比亚名菜呢for dinner with the family tonight. 为了今晚的家庭聚餐准备的Chunchullo. 圈圈肉What is that -- like, uh, tacos? 那是啥跟玉米卷差不多吗Yes, like tacos. 对就跟玉米卷似的No, it isn't. 才不是呢- It's the small intestine of a pig. - Oh, Geez. -这是猪肠做的 -我的老天爷Why can't we eat regular food like normal people? 我们就不能像其他人一样吃正常点儿吗I told you, Jay. 我跟你说过滴杰My grandmother, who rests in peace, 我那远在天国的奶奶has been coming to me in my dreams, 曾经托梦给我telling me that I'm losing touch with my roots. 告诫我不要忘本See, this is awkward, 你看这下尴尬了because my dead uncle joe told me to have steak tonight.因为我死了的叔叔告诉我今晚该吃牛排No, no, no, Jay. Have some respect. 不不不杰放尊重点My grandmother can hear you. 我奶奶能听见你滴What do you mean, she can hear us? 什么意思她能听到我们吗Well, in our culture, 是这样滴在我们的文化里we believe that the dead are all around us. 我们相信死者的灵魂就在我们身边She's right, Manny. 她说的对曼尼She could be right here, 可能现在她就在你背后her bony fingers reaching out from the grave. 从坟墓里伸出她那瘦骨嶙峋的手指Yeah, keep it up, Jay. 厉害哦杰继续忽悠呀There's already one dead person in this room. 这房子里已经有一个死人了You want to make it two? 你也想死是哇I'm sorry. I've got a printer to install. 我错了我去装打印机Oh, Gloria, have your grandmother 歌洛莉亚麻烦让你奶奶run me up an iced tea in about 10 minutes. 十分钟后给我拿杯冰红茶来Yeah, she has a better chance of making that work than you! 是啊她要活着滴话干得比你好Why don't you save us the stomping and the swearing and call Phil? 你打电话给菲尔啊省得一会你搞砸了又叫又骂He's good at that stuff. 他这方面比较牛Better than me? 能有我牛Phil's not better than me at anything, 菲尔任何方面都没我牛Except maybe making that stupid sound with his mouth. 他也就只会怪叫啥的A what, what 咋咋样You spit on me. 你口水喷我脸上了Haley, honey, um, I need you to do something for me. 宝贝海莉来帮我个忙Ugh. Mom, my arm hurts. 啊妈我手痛Why don't you find out what it is 你都不知道我找你啥事before you start making up excuses to get out of it? 着急编瞎话干嘛Okay, what is it? 好吧说吧I need you to talk to your sister. 我要你去和你妹妹谈谈I think that there's something going on with her and a boy. 我觉得她和某个男孩子有暧昧So? 然后So, I am your mother, and it is my job to make sure 然后我是你们的妈妈that you girls don't get involved with a predator. 确保你们不被坏蛋给剥皮吃了Okay, mom, stop watching "Dateline." 得了吧妈妈别再看新闻联播了And why can't you just talk to her? 你自己怎么不去和她谈I have tried to talk to her. 我试过了I -- she won't talk to me. You know that. 她不会跟我开口的你懂的That's because you get so weird every time a boy comes near us.因为一有男孩接近我们你就变得神经质I-I just don't want you girls to -- 我只是不想你们这些女孩子- To make the same mistakes that you did? - No! -重蹈你的覆辙吗 -不是No. 当然不是Mom, I'm not an idiot. 老妈我又不傻I pick up on things. 我看得出来And I don't think that you were the good girl 你可不是你口中描述的you pretend you were. 那种好女孩Wow. That is so untrue. 天哪你大错特错了I was a very good girl. Mm. 你不知道我以前有多乖Your kids don't need to know 孩子不需要知道They need to know who you wish you were, 他们只需了解你想要的完美形象and they need to try to live up to that person. 还必须以你为榜样They're gonna fall short, 他们可能达不到这个标准but better they fall short of the fake you 但参照人物是虚构的完美的你than the real you. 肯定比真实的你强Which is why we don't hide anything. 所以我们从不隐瞒That's the opposite of what I just said. 你说的和我的刚好相反I was not listening. 我溜号了I'll say it again -- I love you in paisley. 我还得说一遍我喜欢你穿这件佩斯利Oh, let me lock the door and draw the curtains. 不如先关好门拉好窗帘What does that mean? 你什么意思-It doesn't mean anything. -Good. -什么意思都没有 -很好You know exactly what it means. 你当然知道我什么意思You won't kiss me in front of other people 你不在别人面前亲我because you're ashamed of who you are. 是因为你不能正视自己And, yes...I went there. 没错我就是戳你痛处了Okay, you can't say, "Yes, I went there," 你不能拿戳我当乐事when you go there all the time. 还企图用过去式And, by the way, I'm the one who makes speeches on airplanes 再说了每次飞机上有人对咱们另眼相待every time someone looks at us weird. 可都是我站出来教育他们I'm the one who gives my dad hell 我爸爸说你是我"朋友"的时候when he refers to you as my "Friend." 也是我跟他挑明挖烂了理论That's different. That's confrontation. 那不一样那是正面冲突But you know what takes real strength? 但你知道什么才最需要勇气吗Whining? 抱怨吗-Affection. -Oh, this is insane. -是表达爱意 -受不了了Buying a shirt -- it's not a kiss-worthy moment. 买衬衫有什么可亲的Oh, I didn't know there was an official list. 我不知道这还有官方规定Please, tell us -- what is on the list? 求你告诉我什么时候能亲I'll tell you what's not on the list -- 我告诉你什么时候不亲吧Finding jalapeno-stuffed olives, 吃了夹辣椒的橄榄making the light on maple, 给枫树挂灯泡的时候every time we see a V.W. 看到大众车的时候也不亲You don't like "Kiss-buggy"? 你不喜欢玩"亲亲甲壳虫"[看到大众甲壳虫车就亲亲] It's not a real game! 那根本就不是游戏It -- it's just another way for you to be needy. 那不过是你黏人的一种方式I -- and I don't appreciate you making me feel bad 你可别想把我搞得很内疚because I can't live up to your impossible standards. 因为我可达不到你那离谱的标准Nobody kisses at a bowling alley! 没人在保龄球馆接吻I almost got a turkey! 我差点打出三击全中"Yello"? 侬好Oh, hey, Jay. Just a sec. I'll go get Claire. 你好杰等下我找克莱尔去Oh, actually, it's you I'm calling. 其实我找你What was that? 什么声音The cat. There's a cat. What's up? 是猫有只猫什么事Well, Gloria's been missing her grandmother. 歌洛莉亚很想念她的外婆I've been trying to get this old picture of her printed, 我一直想打印出一张她的照片but I can't get this new printer to -- 但是新的打印机我...I'll be right there. 我马上到Luke, grandpa needs us! 卢克外公需要我们Hells yes, I was glad to get the call. 接到电话我当然很高兴Jay's always around here fixing things, 杰总来我家修东西cracking jokes about my "Delicate hands" 嘲笑我柔弱的双手or my gag response to the smell of paint. 还有我一闻油漆就吐Look who needs me now 看看谁来求哥了Mr. Hot-dog fingers who can't press "Print" "手好粗"先生每次想按打印键without hitting three extra keys. 他那胖手都会多按好几个按钮Yeah! 真菜You're in my house now, Jay! 你可是在我的主场杰T-technically, we'll be in his house, 准确的说我要去他的地盘迎战but we'll be in my area... 但是他的地盘of his house. 哥做主So, I hear you have a boyfriend. 我听说你有男朋友了- No, I don't. - Who is he? -哪有 -他是谁- I'm not talking to you about this. - Oh, come on. -我才不告诉你呢 -说吧You're finally interesting. Just tell me. 你总算有点八卦可挖了快说呗He's not my boyfriend. 他不是我男友It's Jeremy Reed. 他叫杰里米·瑞德It's -- he's just this boy that I -- 不过是个男孩我...- Love? - No! -爱他 -没有Well, have you guys kissed yet? 你们接吻了吗No! 没有Well, what are you waiting for? 那你等什么呢I'm not waiting. I'm 13. 我没等人家才13岁And you've never kiss boy? 你还没亲过男生How old were you? 你初吻什么时候Like 11. 11岁的时候吧And it was beautiful. 唯美极了I was in Jackson Kaner's carpeted garage. 是在杰克逊·肯纳家铺了地毯的车库里- 11? - Yeah. -11岁 -是啊So you better get on it, 你最好也抓紧or else he's gonna think you're a lesbian. 要不然他会觉得你是拉拉He's not going to think I'm a lesbian. 他才不会认为我是拉拉I thought you were. 我就以为你是You totally have the sandals for it. 你那凉鞋很拉拉Let's see this bad boy. 我们来看看出了什么问题Oh, a P-750. Nice unit. P-750型不错I would have sprung for the 840, 要是我会选840那款But I get it -- 但是我知道not everyone can handle that kind of horsepower. 不是谁都能玩转这种高级货的I thought maybe the cordless phone was interfering, 我以为是无线电话干扰了信号so I unplugged it. 我就给它拔了Good idea. Maybe we should run downstairs 好主意也许我们应该下楼and unplug the toaster while we're at it. 把面包机也拔了Oh, snap, dad. 幽默啊老爸Toaster. 面包机We're kidding. 开玩笑A cordless phone is 5.8 gigahertz. This is wi-fi. 无线电话是5.8千兆赫这个是无线网络It's a totally different spectrum. 用的不是一个频谱Walk with me? 跟我来Here's a little trick that I've found pretty useful with Claire. 教克莱尔使用电器的时候我发明了个小诀窍The computer and the printer must talk, talk, talk 电脑和打印机必须要交流流流command-p" Makes the picture walk, walk, walk" command+p[苹果快捷键] 图片就出来了了了How come it's not working? 好像没反应啊It should be. 不应该啊Okay. 好吧Uh, that should be printing. 应该开始打印了So... 应该是...Hey, Phil, I'm gonna get a beer, beer, beer 菲尔在打的你头头头之前Before I hit you in the head, head, head. 我要先喝杯啤酒酒酒Hey. What are you doing here? 嘿有事吗Hi, Jeremy. I want to ask you something. 杰里米我有问题想问你- Sure, ask - Wait, don't talk yet. -好问 -等等你先别出声Here is the thing. 是在这么回事We've texting for a while, and it's been nice, 我们短信已经发了一段时间了这样挺好but I feel like it's leading to something else, 但我感觉我们不止于此and I don't know if you do or not, 我不知道你有没有这种感觉but I guess what I'm trying to say is, 我要说的是I'm just a girl standing in front of a boy 我只是一个女孩站在一个男孩面前asking for him to like her. 请他喜欢她Oh, god, that's from "Notting hill." 不对这句是《诺丁山》的台词So dorky. But a really underrated movie. 太老套了不过这绝对是部被低估的电影What's happening? 你想表达什么I'm not a lesbian. 我不是拉拉I would like for you to kiss me. 我想你亲我Oh, I love watching you stir. 我喜欢看你搅拌的样子Then I will stop. 那我就停下What? Are you still mad at me? 怎么你还生我的气Yes. You have to apologize for making fun of my culture, my beliefs, 是你要为取笑我滴文化我滴信仰my chunchullo, my abuela. 我滴圈圈肉我滴奶奶而道歉I'm sorry. 对不起If you think your Grandmother's here with us, 如果你认为你奶奶也在这里I respect that. 我表示尊重Now, come here. 来抱抱Oh, Grandma! Where'd you come from? 奶奶你从哪冒出来的We're gonna have to get you a little bell. 看来我们要给你系个小铃铛才行Enough, Jay! 够了杰My culture is very important to me! 我的文化对我很重要I've been working all day to share it with your family tonight,为了今晚跟你滴家人吃饭我忙了一整天and all you do is mock me! 你却只管嘲笑我Just go! 走开Honey, I'm sorry. 亲爱的对不起I'm just teasing you. 我只是逗你玩Instead of being the comedian, why don't you help me? 有时间当小丑干嘛不帮我What do you need? 要我干什么- Slap the chicken. - Do what? -拍鸡肉 -干什么In Colombia, when you cook in honor of the departed, 在哥伦比亚为了表示对死者的尊重you have to scare death away from the food 烹饪前要把死神从食物吓走to protect the people that are gonna eat it. 以保护将要吃此食物滴人Slap it and yell. 一边拍一边叫That's the nuttiest -- 那也太傻缺了-Jay! -Calm down. -杰 -淡定Give me the chicken. 鸡肉拿来Here we go. 拍就拍That's not scaring anything away. 介么轻什么也吓不跑When my grandfather used to cook, 以前我爷爷做饭滴时候the whole house would shake. 整间房子都在颤抖Louder. 大声点Higher. 调高点Louder! 不够大声Higher! Louder! There! 调再高声再大这才差不多I made all that up. 我瞎编滴That is not a real custom in Colombia. 哥伦比亚没有这个习俗We're not lunatics. 我们又不是精神错乱But you mess with us, and we mess with you. 但你惹姐不高兴姐也不让你舒坦That's the custom. 这才素我们的习俗Louder! 大声点Hey, honey. Where'd you go? 亲爱的你去哪了Nowhere. Just for a bike ride. 哪也没去就骑了会脚踏车Oh, my god! Puh-lease tell me this text is wrong! 我的天求求你告诉我这短信纯属虚构Did you really just go over to that kid's house 你真跑去那个小屁孩的家and try and kiss him in front of a million people?! 在众目睽睽之下跟他索吻- Alex, did you do that? - You got a text? -艾丽克斯你真这么做了 -你收到短信爆料了Oh, yeah. Everybody knows. 当然地球人都知道了Do you know how embarrassing this is for me?! 你知道这让我有多尴尬吗This is all your fault! 这都是你的错You're the one who said I had to kiss him or I was a lesbian!是你说我如果不跟他接吻就是拉拉Haley! Did you say that to her?! 海莉你真这么说了Oh, don't turn this on me. Look at her shoes! 别扯到我身上你看她穿的那双鞋Ugh! I'm never going back to school now. 我永远都不要去上学了No, sweetheart. Yes, you are. You are going back to school. 不亲爱的你要你要去上学But listen to me-- Just because a boy sends you flirty texts. 但听我说男生给你发暧昧短信Doesn't mean that 并不表示-you have to text him back - what?! You read my texts?! -你要回复他 -什么你偷看我短信- I... - You read her texts?! -我... -你偷看她短信That's why you made me talk to her?! 这就是为什么你要我跟她谈You made her talk to me?! 是你让她跟我谈的I kind of feel like we're spinning out here a little bit. 我觉得我们现在把话题扯远了Look, Alex, the important thing here 艾丽克斯重点是Is that you have to be very careful how you behave around boys 你跟男生的交往要格外小心Because it is so easy to get a reputation. 要不你很容易就把名声给毁了Well, I'm sorry I'm not a perfect little good girl like you were!我很抱歉我不像你是那么完美的乖乖女Were you? 你乖吗Were you?! 你乖吗?!I highly doubt it! 我严重怀疑Don't be such a chicken. There's no ghost in here. 胆子别这么小这里根本没有什么鬼魂I'm telling you, my Mom said her dead grander was in the house. 我说真的我妈说她过世的奶奶就在这She said she felt her here this morning... 她说她今天早上感觉到她的存在In this room. 就在这个房间Maybe your Mom's mentally ill. 也许你妈精神病Who puts a router... in the attic? 是哪个天刹的把路由器... 放在阁楼里Did she have a limp and a cane? 她是不是腿脚不便杵着一根枴杖Ghost of Manny's great-grandma, 曼尼曾祖母的鬼魂if that's really you, 如果真是你Show yourself! 快快显灵That's her! 这就是我曾祖母Come on! 怎么会Why?! 为什么Why?!! 为什么?!!-Hi, grandpa.- How we doing, girls? -外公好 -你们好吗孩子们Mom ruined my life today. 我今天算是被妈妈毁了-I didn't ruin your life. I was - don't even talk to me! -我没有我是 -不要和我说话I didn't even want to come here. 我根本都不想来这Well, okay. 好了Snacks and and sodas are in the living room, 点心和苏打水在客厅But don't fill up -- we've got intestines coming. 别吃太饱一会还要吃猪肠Uh, dad, if you're looking for your shoes, 那个爸如果你在找鞋I think I know where they are. 我晓得在哪儿This happens to be a colombian custom -- 这是个哥伦比亚风俗Walking in the footsteps of the ancestors, blah, blah, blah. 追随祖先的足迹啥啥啥的Beats slapping the chicken. 总比让我拍鸡肉好过Here, I brought you a drink. 来我给你拿了杯喝的Oh, wait a minute -- 等一下Sip it first. 你先喝一口I'm not mad at you. 我没生你气I thought about it, and maybe you're right. 我想了一下也许你是对的I can be a little needy sometimes. 有时候我是有点粘人了Oh, well, I-I appreciate that. 喔谢谢你那么说And you're probably not entirely off base. 当然也不全是你的错I mean, lord knows I-I've got my quirks. 我是说天知道我自己也很怪咖And I-I'm not the most demonstrative guy around, 我不是个爱感情外露的人But I'm -- I'm working on it. 但是我在改-And I'm gonna help you with it. -Good. -我会帮你的 -好Just don't give up on me. 别失去耐心Never. 永远不会Okay, everybody, let's gather around! 大家伙都过来Jay, come here. 杰过来Tonight we dine on the traditional colombian recipes 今晚我们吃传统哥伦比亚菜of my abuela, my grandmother. 我奶奶的拿手菜 [abuela西班牙语里祖母的意思]And even though she's no longer with me, 尽管她已经不在了I am very happy because I have all of you. 但素我很高兴因为我有你们To ana-maria rosa de la immaculada jimenez morales. 为了我的祖母干杯[祖母名字不要太~长] To ana-maria rosa... 为… 那谁干杯That was beautiful, Gloria, 歌洛莉亚太美好了just like my Mitchell. 就像我的米奇尔一样Just slipped right off there. 好滑Ay, Cameron, what happened? 卡梅隆怎么了One moment you were there, 刚才你还坐在那the next, only shoes. 一眨眼滴功夫就只看见鞋子了I'll tell you what happened -- 我告诉你是怎么回事Mitchell is embarrassed to kiss me 米奇尔不好意思in front of other people. 在别人面前吻我No, you ambushed me! 不是的是你太突然了Oh, Cam, come on. 小卡算了吧Don't take it personally. 他不是针对你When Mitchell was in high school, 米奇尔上高中的时候He was dating this girl -- Robin Schier. 和一个叫罗宾·希尔的女孩约会He would never kiss her, either. 他也从来不吻人家That's because I was gay. 那是因为我是同志What's your excuse now? 那现在你又有什么借口Ay, Cameron, it's not Mitch's fault. 卡梅隆这不怪米奇尔He gets it from his father. 他遗传他爸Jay doesn't like the lovey-dovey in public, either. 杰也不喜欢在公共场合黏黏呼呼滴I can't believe you're coming at me right now. 简直不敢相信你又扯到我身上来了I'm standing here with shoes around my neck. 我现在站在这脖子上还套着双鞋And for the better part of a half-hour, 有大半个钟头I screamed the death out of your meat. 我都在大嚷着把肉里面的死神吓出来-Now, what do you want from me? -Don't you see? -你到底想让我怎么样 -看见了吧It's because of you 都是因为你that your son cannot kiss his own lover. 你儿子才不肯吻他情人的- Don't say "Lover." - we don't like "Lover." -不要说"情人" -我们不喜欢说"情人" Can we just eat? 我们吃饭好不好No. Tell Mitch 不行你告诉米奇尔that it's okay to kiss Cam in front of you. 他可以当着你的面吻卡梅隆Why is that something we have to do? 干嘛非得这样We don't. 不需要Of course we don't. 当然不需要Oh, I'm sorry that I don't want to make out with you 真对不起我不想当着我全家人的面in front of my whole family. 和你亲热No need to apologize. 不用道歉Oh, Gloria is right. 歌洛莉亚说的对Dad, you being so emotionally closed off 爸爸你这么封闭自己的感情makes it very difficult for your children to show affection.影响了你的孩子也很难表达自己的感情- Really? - Yes. -是吗 -没错You had trouble showing affection in public places? 你在公共场合也不善于表达感情-Yes!- You? -Yes. -对 -你吗 -是的Was that before or after 那是在你什么也没穿you were delivered to my door in a squad car, 只穿着内衣披着警察局的毯子wearing nothing but your underwear and a police blanket? 被巡逻车送到我门口之前还是之后Oh, my god. What? You were arrested? 天哪什么你进去过-Awesome! - Not awesome. -太给力了 -给什么力And I wasn't arrested. 我没有被逮捕Your grandfather was just telling a joke. 你们外公只是在开玩笑It was just a joke. I got a million of 'em. 玩笑吗我能讲N个呢Dad. 爸爸I did it! 我成功啦It's printing! 能打印了I had to download new firmware, install new drivers, 我下载了新固件安装了新的驱动程序change your encryption, and replace an ethernet cable 改了你的加密码还在蒸笼似的阁楼上in a 100-degree attic, 换了条以太网线缆while dodging particularly aggressive spiders, 一边还得防着点蜘蛛but I did it! 但是我做到了Thanks. 谢谢Oh. Okay. I guess that's it. 喔看来就这样了What? What's it? 什么就怎么样了Wake up, dummy. 还不明白吗傻瓜This is what we're talking about. 这就是我们说的This guy's been working like an imbecile all day for you. 这家伙像白痴一样给你忙活了一天People need something else -- kisses, hugs. 我们还需要别的东西亲吻拥抱What, for fixing a printer? 什么就为了修理个打印机吗Oh, it's fine. It was only four hours. 也没什么只用了四个小时I tipped over a paint can and threw up a little, 我让一个油漆桶绊倒了小吐了一下But I think -- I think "Thanks" about covers it. 但是我想我想这句"谢谢"也够了Well, what's wrong with "Thanks"? 是啊说"谢谢"怎么了It's pretty much the bare minimum, dad. 爸爸这几乎是最低程度的感激了Jay, for god's sakes, just say something. 杰看在上帝份上说点什么You want me to say something? 你想让我说点什么吗How about "You're welcome"? 那"欢迎你们"怎么样How about "I'm -- I'm so happy to be here for you all "我很高兴你们大家都能来"so I can take the blame for all your crap." "所以我才能在这享受你们的碎碎念"吗I don't do this, 我做不来I never did that. 我从来也不做这个Trust me, I gave you twice 相信我我给你们的已经比我父亲as much as my father ever gave me. 给我的要多出一倍了The man kissed me one time in my entire life. 他一辈子就吻过我一次He came up behind me, kissed me on the back of the head, 他走到我身后亲了下我的后脑勺said, "Goodnight, Becky." 对我说晚安贝奇He thought I was my sister. 他竟然把我当成了我妹妹Wait a minute. 等一下When was the last time you kissed Mitch? 你上次亲米奇是什么时候What does that have to do with anything? 这都哪跟哪啊Mitch, when was the last time he kissed you? 米奇他上次亲你是什么时候I-I don't remember. 我记不得了- It wasn't that long ago. - I was 12. -又没多久 -我12岁的时候12? This is the problem! 12岁这就是问题所在Jay's dad doesn't kiss Jay, 杰的老爸不亲杰so Jay doe't kiss Mitch, and Mitch is uptight. 所以杰就不亲米奇从而导致米奇灰常保守Okay, okay, "Uptight" was really not on the table. 好了好了现在不是谈我保不保守的事This is more about kissing. 我们是在谈亲吻Jay, kiss your son. He's a mess. 杰亲吻你的儿子他简直一团糟Oh, come on, now. 不会吧现在吗We don't have to do that. It's... 我们其实不必这么做的- Yes, you do. - No. - Come on. -你要做 - 不Come on, do it. You're in front of your grandchildren. 快滴亲嘛孙辈们都看着呢All right, all right! Shut up! 好吧好吧别吵了Mitch, get over here. 米奇过来W-what, now? Well, I feel weird now. 什么现在吗我觉得太诡异了Don't be coy. 别扭扭捏捏的What are you waiting for, a box of chocolates? 你还等什么呢一盒巧克力吗Let's do this. 过来亲亲That's the sweetest thing I've ever seen. 这是我见过的最甜蜜的事了All right, and now because I never want to hear this again. 就这样我现在可不想再听到有人抱怨You. 到你了Not you. 没你的事Oh, daddy, I love you. 爸爸我爱你Let's go eat chunchullo! 我们来吃圈圈肉吧You know it's made of pig intestines, right? 那是用猪肠做的对吗Alex, wait. 艾丽克斯等一下- What? - I want to talk to you. -怎么了 -我想和你谈谈Mom, I don't want another lecture. 妈妈我不想再听你的那些说教了It's not a lecture. I want to tell you something. 不是说教我想告诉你一些事情Honey, I know exactly how you're feeling. 亲爱的我完全了解你现在的心情No, you don't. 不你不了解Okay, the -- the joke that grandpa told tonight? 好吧还记得今晚外公讲的那个笑话吗That -- that happened. 确确实有这么回事That...That was true. 那是真的So, you were arrested naked? 这么说你真裸着被抓过I wasn't naked! 我没裸And I was not arrested per se. 而且我本身也没有被抓I was driven home one night by the police 我只是有天晚上被警车送回家because my boyfriend and I 而这是因为我和我男友had gone swimming in somebody's pool, 没带泳衣and we didn't have bathing suits and -- blah, blah, blah. 就跑去别人的水池里游泳等等等等The details aren't important. 细节不重要What matters is that everybody at school was talking about it.关键在于学校里每个人都在谈论这件事And I thought I would die. 我当时以为自己死定了But it passed. 不过这事儿也就这么过去了I swear. 我发誓And now, honey, I'm -- I'm glad it happened. 而现在宝贝我很高兴有这么回事I've got a funny story to tell at dinner parties. 这让我在晚宴时有笑料可说So, how long did it take before you thought it was funny? 那你花了多久才觉得这事儿有趣的Oh, god... 老天10, 15 years. 十到十五年吧Great. What do I do about tomorrow? 好极了我明天怎么办I don't think you have to worry about that. 我认为你不需要担心这个Go, go, go. 去吧去吧In Colombia, we kiss for everything, 在哥伦比亚我们常常亲吻because a kiss can mean so many different things. 因为一个吻可以有辣么多涵义There's no ghost in here, is there? 这儿没鬼吧Not a chance. 当然没Sleep easy, kid. 睡个好觉孩子It can be the start of something new. 它可能素一个全新的开始It can be how we say, "This is the person that I love." 也可能素我们说"这是我的爱人"的方式So who's a better kisser, me or your dad? 谁吻功更高我还是你老爸Ew. 恶[与"你"音相近]It can be romantic. 也可能会很浪漫Just so you know, if my friends weren't there, 只是想告诉你要是我朋友不在那儿的话I would've said yes. 我会答应你的So, if you still want to... 所以要是你还愿意的话If it's okay... 要是可以的话Maybe we should hang out more first. 或许我们应该先多约会几次This is only the second conversation we've had 毕竟这是我们除了短信之外that wasn't by text. 第二次说话It can also be worth waiting for. 也可能会值得等待Jay, what is this? 杰这是什么Just another nice thing I did for you 不过是你耍我的时候。