jokes英文幽默笑话
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那些出乎意料的笑话英文Surprising Jokes in English that Will Catch You Off GuardHumor is a universal language, and jokes have the power to bring joy and laughter to people across cultures. Oftentimes, jokes can catch us off guard and leave us laughing unexpectedly. In this article, we will explore some surprising jokes in English that are sure to make you chuckle.1. The Talking DogA man walks into a bar with his dog and orders a drink. The bartender is amazed when the dog says, "I can talk! Can I have a drink too?" The bartender replies, "Sure, why not?" After giving both the man and the dog their drinks, he asks the dog, "So, what else can you do?" The dog replies, "Well, I can also play the piano!" Skeptical, the bartender tells the man to prove it. Surprisingly, the dog jumps on the piano and starts playing a beautiful tune. Astounded, the bartender exclaims, "Wow, that's incredible! Can your dog also do taxes?" The man replies, "Taxes? Don't be silly, he's not an accountant. He's actually a lawyer!"2. The Forgetful WaiterA customer enters a restaurant and asks the waiter, "Do you have frog legs?" The waiter replies, "Yes, we do." Excited, the customer exclaims, "Great! Then hop into the kitchen and bring me a steak!"3. The Complimentary BagelsTwo friends are having brunch at a café when one of them notices a sign that says, "Complimentary Bagels for the Next Customer!" Curious, he asksthe waitress, "Are the bagels really free?" She nods and says, "Yes, they are." Excited, he turns to his friend and says, "Let's wait for the next customer to arrive and quickly steal their bagels!"4. The Clever ParrotA man walks into a pet store and sees a parrot for sale. The parrot seems quite ordinary until the man notices a sign next to its cage that says, "This parrot can speak four languages and solve complex math problems." Intrigued, the man asks the store owner, "Is it true that this parrot is so intelligent?" The store owner nods and replies, "Yes, it's incredibly smart." Excited, the man asks the parrot, "What's 2+2?" Surprisingly, the parrot remains silent. Frustrated, the man turns to the store owner and says, "You said this parrot could solve math problems!" The parrot interrupts and says, "I'm sorry, I was just pondering if it's 4 or 4.0. Math can be quite abstract, you know."5. The Astonished TouristA tourist visits a famous museum and stumbles upon a statue of a sleeping person. Intrigued, the tourist asks the museum guide, "Is the person in the statue really sleeping?" The guide chuckles and says, "No, not anymore. The museum closes at 5 pm, and she is the security guard!"6. The Talking ClockA man walks into a store and sees a clock that claims it can speak every language. Curious, he sets the clock to French and waits. The clock chimes and says, "C'est l'heure!" Surprised by the clock's accuracy, he sets it to German. The clock chimes and says, "Es ist Zeit!" Amazed, he decides totest it with Chinese. The clock chimes and says, "现在是时间!" Shocked, the man decides to try one last language, English. The clock chimes and says, "The time is..."And there you have it – a collection of surprising jokes in English that will catch you off guard and bring a smile to your face. No matter the language, humor has the power to bring people together and brighten their day. So, next time you hear a joke, be prepared to laugh unexpectedly!。
简短的英语笑话带翻译摘抄笑话(jokes)往往是指能引人发笑的谈话或故事。
作为文体,篇幅短小,故事情节简单而巧妙,往往出人意料,取得令人捧腹的艺术效果。
店铺整理了简短的英语笑话带翻译,欢迎阅读!简短的英语笑话带翻译篇一Wow!That's a Big One!哇!那个真是大得吓人One day a tourist walked into a Texas tavern and ordered a shot of whiskey. The bartender puta big tumbler full of whiskey in front of him.某一天一位观光客走进一家德州酒店点了一杯威士忌,酒保竞给他一大杯的酒。
"What's this?" asked the tourist.“这是什么呢?”观光客问道。
"Why, it's a shot of whiskey! Don't you know that everything is big in Texas?"“怎么了,那是你点的酒,难道你不知道德州每样东西都大得吓人。
”Then, an armadillo ran past the door.那时刚好有一只穿山甲跑过酒店门口。
“What was that?" asked the tourist.“那是什么东西?’观光客又问。
"Why, that was a Texas cockroach. "“哦,那是只德州蟑螂!”By this time, the whiskey had gone to the tourist's bladder as well as his head,喝了酒,观光客感到腹胀头昏,and he asked the location of the bathroom.他问哪里有洗手间。
英语笑话带翻译范文1. Joke: Why did the scarecrow win an award?Answer: Because he was outstanding in his field!Translation: 为什么稻草人获得了奖项?因为他在他的领域表现出色!2. Joke: Why don't skeletons fight each other?Answer: They don't have the guts!Translation: 为什么骷髅不互相打架?因为它们没有胆量!3. Joke: How does a penguin build its house?Answer: Igloos it together!Translation: 企鹅是如何建造它的房子的?用冰块把它粘在一起!4. Joke: What do you call a bear with no teeth?Answer: A gummy bear!Translation: 没有牙齿的熊叫什么?果冻熊!5. Joke: Why don't eggs tell jokes?Answer: Because they might crack up!Translation: 为什么鸡蛋不讲笑话?因为它们可能会笑破肚皮!6. Joke: How do you organize a space party?Answer: You planet!Translation: 你如何组织太空派对?你把星球放在那儿!7. Joke: Why don't scientists trust atoms?Answer: Because they make up everything!Translation: 为什么科学家不相信原子?因为它们构成了一切!8. Joke: What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? Answer: An abdominal snowman!Translation: 一个有六块腹肌的雪人叫什么?腹肌雪人!9. Joke: What did one wall say to the other wall?Answer: I'll meet you at the corner!Translation: 一个墙对另一个墙说了什么?我们在角落见!10. Joke: Why don't seagulls fly over the bay?Answer: Because then they would be bagels!Translation: 海鸥为什么不飞过海湾?因为那样它们就成了贝果!11. Joke: What do you call a bear without any ears? Answer: B!Translation: 没有耳朵的熊叫什么?B!12. Joke: What did zero say to eight?Answer: Nice belt!Translation: 零对八说了什么?漂亮的腰带!13. Joke: How do you make a tissue dance?Answer: You put a little boogie in it!Translation: 如何让纸巾跳舞?装点点动作!14. Joke: Why was the math book sad?Answer: Because it had too many problems!Translation: 数学书为什么伤心?因为它有太多问题!Answer: It left its Windows open!Translation: 电脑为什么冷?因为它忘记关掉窗口!这些英语笑话可以为大家带来一些轻松愉快的时刻。
English Jokes[美]Marshall’s Talent Education, LLC. 龚珍妮 编译英语笑话An English teacher is giving a lesson to his students. He asks his students a question, “What is the most common word used by students in a classroom?”The whole class is silent. It seems that none of them can answer such a difficult question. Suddenly a boy student stands up and says, “Can’t, Sir!”“Smart! You are right. Please sit down,” says the teacher.一位英语老师正在给他的学生上课。
他问学生一个问题:“学生在教室里最常用的词是什么?”全班学生都安静了下来。
看来,他们谁也回答不了这么难的一个问题。
突然,一个男生站了起来,说道:“不会,先生!”“聪明!你回答正确。
请坐下。
”老师说。
give a lesson to给……上课the most common最常见的common adj. 常见的used by …被……使用 whole adj.全部的;整个的whole class 全班seem v.似乎;看上去suddenly adv.突然Notes:不会1. Can’tA maths teacher is giving a lesson to her students. She asks, “How can you make the number seven to an even number?”Wood stands up and says loudly, “Just take the ‘s’ out from it!”At this, all the others laugh and laugh.一位数学老师正在给她的学生上课。
English Jokes1,Money is not everything, because there is mastercard and visa sometimes.钱不是万能的,有时候还需要信用卡。
2,A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second"一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.他问:"主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又问:"那一百万年呢?"上帝说:"一秒钟."最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"上帝回答:"过一秒钟."3,Four best friends met at the hospital since their wives were giving births to their babies. The nurse comes up to the first man and says, "Congratulations, you got twins." The man said "How strange, I'm the manager of Minnesota Twins." After awhile the nurse comes up to the second man and says, "Congratulations, you got triplets." Man was like "Hmmm, strange I worked as a director for the "3 musketeers." Finally, the nurse comes up to the third man and says"Congratulations, you got twins x2." Man is happy and says, "Ironic, I work for the hotel "4 Seasons." All three of them are happy until they seetheir last buddy jumping all over the place, cursing God and banging his head on the wall. They asked him what's wrong and he answered, "What's wrong? I work for 7up"!四个好朋友在医院里碰面了,他们的妻子正在生产.护士过来对第一个男人说:"恭喜,你得了双胞胎."男人说:"多奇怪呀,我是明尼苏达双子队的经理."过了一会儿,护士过来对第二个男人说:"恭喜,你得了三胞胎."男人很喜欢:"嗯,又巧了.我是3M公司的董事."最后,护士跑来对第三个男人说:"恭喜,你得了2对双胞胎."男人很开心地说:"真令人啼笑皆非,我为四季宾馆工作."他们三个都很高兴,但第四个伙伴急得像热锅上的蚂蚁,咒骂上帝并用头撞墙.他们问他有什么不对劲,他回答道:"什么不对劲?我可是在七喜公司工作呀!"4,Once two hunters went hunting in the forest. One of them suddenly fell down by accident. He showed the whites of his eyes and seemed to have ceased breathing. The other hunter soon took out his mobile phone to call the emergency center for help. The operator said calmly:"First, you should make sure that he is already dead." Then the operator heard a gunshot from the other end of the phone and next he heard the hunter asking:"What should I do next?"两个猎人进森林里打猎,其中一个猎人不慎跌倒,两眼翻白,似已停止呼吸。
The Perfect Son.A: I have the perfect son.B: Does he smoke?A: No, he doesn’t.B: Does he drink whiskey?A: No, he doesn’t.B: Does he ever come home late?A: No, he doesn’t.B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he?A: He will be six months old next Wednesday.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Girl: You would be a good dancer except for two things.Boy: What are the two things?Girl: Your feet.Submitted by Bob Waldman--------------------------------------------------------------------------------A family of mice were surprised by a big cat. Father Mouse jumped and and said, "Bow-wow!" The cat ran away. "What was that, Father?" asked Baby Mouse. "Well, son, that’s why it’s important to learn a second language."Submitted by BH LEE--------------------------------------------------------------------------------My friend said he knew a man with a wooden leg named Smith.So I asked him "What was the name of his other leg?"(Try this one with your students the next time you are teaching a lesson that includes this type of grammer.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------The doctor to the patient: ’You are very sick’Th e patient to the doctor: ’Can I get a second opinion?’The doctor again: ’Yes, you are very ugly too...’I use this joke for retelling in reported speech.Submitted by: Adriana Luchetti--------------------------------------------------------------------------------A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, wherever I touch, it hurts."The doctor asks, "What do you mean?"The man says, "When I touch my shoulder, it really hurts. If I touch my knee - OUCH! When I touch my forehead, it really, really hurts."The doctor says, "I know what’s wrong with you - you’ve broken your finger!"Submitted by Sean McLoughlin--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Patient: Doctor, I have a pain in my eye whenever I drink tea.Doctor: Take the spoon out of the mug before you drink.Submitted by: Irene Pellegrini--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Patient: Doctor! You’ve got to help me! Nobody ever listens to me. No one ever pays any attention to what I have to say.Doctor: Next please!Submitted by Marco Morales, Mexico--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room.The teacher says, "Why are you arguing?"One boy answers, "We found a ten dollor bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie.""You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher, "When I was your age I didn’t even know what a lie was."The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------A snail walks into a bar and the barman tells him there’s a strict policy about having snails in the bar and so kicks him out. A year later the same snail re-enters the bar and asks the barman "What did you do that for?"Submitted by Steve--------------------------------------------------------------------------------A: Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a girl?B: It’s a girl. She’s my daughter.A: Oh, I’m sorry, sir. I didn’t know that you were her father.B: I’m not. I’m her mother.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Mother: "Did you enjoy your first day at school?"Girl: "First day? Do you mean I have to go back tomorrow?Submitted by Miguel de Paco Moltó--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Headmaster: I’ve had comp laints about you, Johnny, from all your teachers. What have you been doing? Johnny: Nothing, sir.Headmaster: Exactly.Submitted by Maria del Pilar Villlegas Martinez--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Teacher: "Nick, what is the past participle of the verb to ring?"Nick: "What do you think it is, Sir?"Teacher: "I don’t think, I KNOW!"Nick: "I don’t think I know either, Sir!"Submitted by Bernadette Kelly--------------------------------------------------------------------------------A: Hey, man! Please call me a taxi.B: Yes, sir. You are a taxi.Submitted by Cláudia Almeida--------------------------------------------------------------------------------A: Why are you crying?B: The elephant is dead.A: Was he your pet?B: No, but I’m the one who must dig his grave.Submitted by Joe, from Indiana--------------------------------------------------------------------------------A teenage girl had been talking on the phone for about half an hour, and then she hung up."Wow!," said her father, "That was short. You usually talk for two hours. What happened?""Wrong number," replied the girl.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------PUPIL: "Would you punish me for something I didn`t do?"TEACHER:" Of course not."PUPIL: "Good, because I haven`t done my homework."Submitted by Miguel de Paco Moltó--------------------------------------------------------------------------------A teacher asked a student to write 55.Student asked: How?Teacher: Write 5 and beside it another 5!The student wrote 5 and stopped.teacher: What are you waiting for?student: I don’t know which side to write the other 5!Submitted by Mahmoud Zeidan--------------------------------------------------------------------------------When I want to teach the coulors, I just ask my students to pretend the phone is ringing and they will answer:Phone rings: "Green, green!"They answer: "Yellow?"They ask: "White?"They hang up: "Pink!"While teaching this use your hands pretending you are holding the phone.Submitted by Maria Crisitna Codorniz--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Little Johnny: Teacher, can I go to the bathroom?Teacher: Little Johnny, MAY I go to the bathroom?Little Johnny: But I asked first!Submitted by: Elise Owen, Dalian China--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Two goldfish in a bowl talking:Goldfish 1: Do you believe in God?Goldfish 2: Of course, I do! Who do you think changes the water?--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Son: Dad, what is an idiot?Dad: An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can’t understand him. Do you understand me?Son: No.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Man: I could go to the end of the world for you.Woman: Yes, but would you stay there?Man: I offer you myself.Woman: I am sorry I never accept cheap gifts.Man: I want to share everything with you.Woman: Let’s start from your bank account.Submitted by kara dolson--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Teacher: Why are you late?Student: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill.Teacher: That’s nice. Were you helping him look for it?Student: No. I was standing on it.Submitted by Fred G. Stone--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Customer: Excuse me, but I saw your thumb in my soup when you were carrying it.Waitress: Oh, that’s okay. The soup isn’t hot.Submitted by Jim Sperling--------------------------------------------------------------------------------The real estate agent says, "I have a good, cheap apartment for you."The man replys, "By the week or by the month?"The agent answers, "By the garbage dump.."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Bank Teller: How do you like the money?English Student: I like it very much.Submitted by Safnil (Bengkulu University Indonesia)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------"Why do you take baths in milk?""I can’t find a cow tall enough for a shower."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Customer in a restaurant: I would like to have a plate of rice and a piece of fried chicken and a cup of coffeeWaitress : Is it enough Sir?Customer : What? Do you think I can’t buy more?Submitted by Safnil (Bengkulu University Indonesia)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------"You look very funny wearing that belt.""I would look even funnier if I didn’t wear it."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------"I was born in California.""Which part?""All of me."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------"Excuse me. Do you know the way to the zoo?""No, I’m sorry I don’t.""Well, it’s two blocks this way, then one block to the left."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Teacher: Do you have trouble making decisions?Student: Well...yes and no.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Three mice are being chased by a cat. The mice were cornered when one of the mice turned around and barked, "Ruff! Ruff! Ruff!" The surprised cat ran away scared. Later when the mice told their mother what happened, she smiled and said, "You see, it pays to be bilingual!"Submitted by Jeanne Ramirez--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Once there were three turtles. One day they decided to go on a picnic. When they got there, they realized they had forgotten the soda. The youngest turtle said he would go home and get it if they wouldn’t eat the sandwiches until he got back. A week went by, then a month, finally a year, when the two turtles said,"oh, come on, let’s eat the sandwiches." Suddenly the little turtle popped up from behind a rock and said, "If you do, I won’t go!"Submitted by Abu Abdulaziz (Kuwait)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------The teacher to a student: Conjugate the verb "to walk" in simple present. The student: I walk. You walk ....The teacher intruptes him: Quicker please.The student: I run. You run ...Submitted by: Mouhssin--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Father: What did you do today to help your mother?Son: I dried the dishesDaughter: And I helped pick up the pieces.Submitted by Fred G. Stone--------------------------------------------------------------------------------A: Look at your face I know what you have for breakfastB: What was it?A: Eggs.B: No, that was yesterday.Submitted by: Janekt Ho--------------------------------------------------------------------------------A: Why are all those people running?B: They are running a race to get a cup.A: Who will get the cup?B: The person who wins.A: Then why are all the others running?Submitted by: Girish Chavan--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Patient: Doctor, I think that I’ve bitten by a vampire.Doctor: Drink this glass of water.Patient: Will it make me better?Doctor: No, I but I’ll be able to see if your neck leaks.Submitted by: Rizwana Lahore Pakistan--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Said to a railroad engineer:What’s the use of having a train schedule if the trains are always late.The reply from the railroad engineer:How would we know they were late, if we didn’t have a schedule?Submitted by Kyle Jefferson--------------------------------------------------------------------------------A: When I stand on my head the blood rushes to my head, but when I stand on my feet the blood doesn’t rush to my feet. Why is this?B: It’s because your feet aren’t empty.Submitted by Kyle Jefferson--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Teacher: Did you father help your with your homework?Student: No, he did it all by himself.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies?Student: I don’t know.Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from?Student: We borrow it from our neighbor.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------On a crowded bus, one man noticed that another man had his eyes closed."What’s the matter? Are you sick?" he asked."No, I’m okay. It’s just that I hate to see old ladies standing."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------If big elephants have big trunks, do small elephants have suitcases?Submitted by lisbeth--------------------------------------------------------------------------------A: Do you want to hear a dirty joke?B: OkA: A white horse fell in the mud.Submitted by Robert Kenneth Peter Kroeker - age 21--------------------------------------------------------------------------------A nervous old lady on a bus was made even more nervous by the fact that the driver periodically took his a rm out of the window. When she couldn’t stand it any longer, she tapped him on the shoulder and whispered on his ear: "Young man...you keep both hands on the wheel...I’ll tell you when it’s raining!" :)Submitted by Joan M. Diez Cliville--------------------------------------------------------------------------------I used to be a werewoolf...But I’m much better noooooooooooow !Submitted by Eric Vadot--------------------------------------------------------------------------------"Spell SPOT three times.""S P O T , S P O T , S P O T""What do you do when you come to a green light?"(answer is invariably-) "Stop!""What, at a GREEN light?"Submitted by Karen--------------------------------------------------------------------------------There is a California dude going through a desert. He’s wearing shorts, sunglasses, a towel andlistening to music on his walkman. He’s having a good time. Suddenly he sees a caravan approaching. He stops the Arabs and ask them cheerfully: "Hey dudes how far is the sea?" They look at each other and say: "Two thousand miles!" And he says: "Wow what a cool beach!!!"Submitted by Robert Stadnik--------------------------------------------------------------------------------In a restaurant:Customer: Waiter, waiter! There is a frog in my soup!!!Waiter: Sorry, sir. The fly is on vacation.Submitted by Daniel Fernando Rodrigues--------------------------------------------------------------------------------One teacher said this to his students before the final test."A" is for God."B" is for me and my wife."C" is for the perfect student."D & F" are for all other students.Submitted by Abu Abdulaziz (Kuwait)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Man said to God --- Why did you make women so beautiful?God said to man --- So that you will love them.Man said to God --- But why did you make them so dumb?God said to man --- So that they will love you.Submitted by Esmond Jones.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------This is a humorous "fake" news items which many adult ESL/EFL students may understand.REDMOND, WA (API) --- MICROSOFT (MSFT) announced today thatthe official release date for the new operating system"Windows 2000" will be delayed until the second quarter of1901.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Knock KnockWho’s there?Olive.Olive who?Olive you so much! (I love you so much..)Submitted by Barbara S.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Knock, knock.Who’s there?Banana.Banana who?Knock, knock.Who’s there?Banana.Banana who?Knock, knock.Who’s there?Banana.Banana who?Knock, knock.Who’s there?Orange.Orange who?Orange you glad I didn’t say banana?Submitted by Pat Bacon--------------------------------------------------------------------------------(For advanced learners... and teachers?)Early one morning, one of the gods was galloping around Mount Olympus. Invigorated by the brisk breeze, he shouted euphorically, "I’m Thor!"His stallion looked back at him and reminded him, "That’th becauthe you forgot the thaddle, thilly!" Submitted by Walter F. Lockhart--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Did you hear about the skeleton who walked into a cafe?He ordered a cup of o a cafe?He ordered a cup of coffee and a mop.Submitted by C. Keyes--------------------------------------------------------------------------------1. Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw?2. Did you hear about the deaf shepherder who gathered his flock and heard?Submitted by Leah Davis--------------------------------------------------------------------------------You can use this joke to explain that insulting someone is considered funny especially when that person is fishing for a compliment.Mary: John says I’m pretty. Andy says I’m ugly. What do you think, Peter?Peter: I think you’re pretty ugly.Submitted by George L. Washington--------------------------------------------------------------------------------My boss is so unpopular even his own shadow refuses to follow him.Submitted by Jozef Karpat--------------------------------------------------------------------------------"Do you know what really amazes me about you?""No.What?""Oops.Sorry. I was thinking about someone else!"--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Why do we park our car in the driveway and drive our car on the parkway?--------------------------------------------------------------------------------If tin whistles are made of tin, what are fog horns made of?--------------------------------------------------------------------------------If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?Submitted by ShahirahComment Probably too difficult for most ESL students.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------A person who speaks two languages is bilingual...A person who speaks three languages is trilingual...A person who speaks four or more languages is multilingual.What is a person who speaks one language?An American.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Man: How can you tell if a man is happy?Woman : Who cares?!(Use as an example of a s。
生活英语笑话带翻译Title: Funny Life English Jokes。
As we all know, laughter is the best medicine. It can relieve stress, improve mood, and even boost our immune system. Today, I would like to share some funny life English jokes with you.1. Why did the tomato turn red?Because it saw the salad dressing!为什么西红柿变红了?因为它看到了沙拉酱!2. Why did the computer go to the doctor?Because it had a virus!为什么电脑去看医生?因为它得了病毒!3. Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide!为什么鸡穿过游乐场?为了到达另一个滑梯!4. Why did the banana go to the doctor?Because it wasn't peeling well!为什么香蕉去看医生?因为它剥皮不顺!5. Why did the bicycle fall over?Because it was two-tired!为什么自行车倒下了?因为它太累了!6. Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because it felt crummy!为什么饼干去看医生?因为它感到很糟糕!7. Why did the fish blush?Because it saw the ocean's bottom!为什么鱼会脸红?因为它看到了海底!8. Why did the grape stop in the middle of the road? Because it ran out of juice!为什么葡萄在路中间停下来了?因为它没有了汁!9. Why did the math book look sad?Because it had too many problems!为什么数学书看起来很伤心?因为它有太多问题!10. Why did the elephant wear green sneakers?Because the red ones were in the wash!为什么大象穿着绿色的运动鞋?因为红色的在洗衣服!I hope these jokes brought a smile to your face and brightened up your day. Remember, laughter is contagious, so share these jokes with your friends and family and spread the joy!。
[美]System 3000 Ltd.龚珍妮 编译1. Outside and inside 外面和里面 Teacher: Charlie, if you had three apples and ate one, how many would you have? Charlie: Three. Teacher: Three? Charlie: Yes, two outside and one inside . 老师:查理,如果你有三个苹果,吃了一个,那你还有几个苹果? 查理:三个。
老师:三个? 查理:是的,两个在外面,一个在里面。
Notes:outside adv. 在外面inside adv. 在里面English Jokes英语笑话Notes:sentence n. 句子2. Where is the egg?鸡蛋在哪里? Teacher: Can you make a sentence with the word “egg”? Student: Yes. I ate a piece of cake yesterday. Teacher: Then where is the “egg”? Student: In the cake, sir. 老师:你能用“鸡蛋”这个词造句吗? 学生:我能。
我昨天吃了一块蛋糕。
老师:那么“鸡蛋”在哪里? 学生:在蛋糕里,老师。
Notes:just adv. 仅仅;只是3. Where do you have trouble?你哪里有麻烦? Student: Excuse me, Miss. I’m calling just to tell you I can’t go to school today . Teacher: Why? What’s wrong? Student: I don’t feel well . Teacher: Where do you feel trouble ? Student: In the classroom. 学生:对不起,老师。
英语超短笑话带翻译Title: A Collection of Hilarious Short Jokes。
Are you in need of a good laugh? Look no further than this collection of hilarious short jokes. These jokes are sure to brighten your day and leave you with a smile onyour face.1. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw thesalad dressing!Translation: 番茄为什么变红了?因为它看到了沙拉酱!2. Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.Translation: 为什么科学家不信任原子?因为它们组成了一切。
3. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.Translation: 你如何称呼一条假面条?是“假意大利面”。
4. What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.Translation: 你如何称呼穿着马甲的鳄鱼?是“调查员”。
5. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.Translation: 稻草人为什么获奖了?因为他在自己的领域里非常出色。
6. Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.Translation: 咖啡为什么要报警?因为它被抢了。
哪些很有趣的笑话英文There are many interesting jokes in English that can bring laughter and amusement to people of all ages. In this article, we will explore some of these jokes and their humor. Let's dive into the world of funny English jokes!1. Knock, knockPerson 1: Knock, knock.Person 2: Who's there?Person 1: Banana.Person 2: Banana who?Person 1: Knock, knock.Person 2: Who's there?Person 1: Banana.Person 2: Banana who?Person 1: Knock, knock.Person 2: Who's there?Person 1: Orange.Person 2: Orange who?Person 1: Orange you glad I didn't say banana again?This classic knock-knock joke relies on the repetition of the banana and orange puns to create humor. The unexpected answer to the question"Orange you glad I didn't say banana again?" adds a twist to the joke and often elicits laughter from the audience.2. Three men on an islandThree men were stranded on a desert island when they discovered a genie lamp. They each rubbed the lamp and the genie appeared. The genie granted each of them one wish.The first man said, "I wish to be rich and return home." Poof! He disappeared and found himself back home, surrounded by wealth.The second man said, "I wish to be reunited with my family and have everlasting happiness." Poof! He disappeared and found himself embracing his loved ones.The third man, looking lonely, said, "I'm lonely. I wish my friends were back here." Poof!This joke plays on the common trope of three wishes and the ironic outcome of the third man's wish. The unexpected twist at the end creates a humorous effect and often results in laughter.3. The spelling beeTeacher: "Can anyone spell 'cat'?"Student: "C-A-T."Teacher: "Great job! Now, can anyone use 'cat' in a sentence?"Student: "My mom has a cat, but my dad is allergic, so we can't have any furniture."This joke relies on a play on words. The student correctly spells the word "cat," but then uses it in a sentence that leads to a humorous unexpected outcome. The comedic effect is derived from the student's clever interpretation of the teacher's question.4. The talking dogA man walks into a bar with his dog and approaches the bartender. The man says, "If my dog can talk, will you give me a free drink?"The bartender, intrigued, agrees.The man turns to the dog and asks, "What sits on top of a house?"The dog barks, "Roof!"The man asks, "What does sandpaper feel like?"The dog barks, "Rough!"The man asks, "Who was the greatest baseball player of all time?"The dog barks, "Ruth!"Impressed, the bartender gives the man a free drink. As the man and his dog enjoy their drinks, another patron approaches and asks in disbelief, "Your dog really talks?"The man replies, "Sure does. He's a great conversationalist. And he can even answer questions about baseball!"This joke relies on the unexpected ability of the dog to answer questions. The punchline, with the dog's response of "Ruth" instead of "Roof" in the context of discussing baseball, creates a humorous twist.In conclusion, English jokes can bring laughter and joy to people. Whether it's a knock-knock joke, a humorous anecdote, or a play on words, these jokes provide entertainment and amusement. So, the next time you're in need of a good laugh, try sharing one of these funny English jokes with your friends and brighten up their day!。
河南固始信合外国语小学 陈妮妮 编译English Jokes 英语笑话1. A toothbrush and a broom牙刷和扫帚甲:当这把牙刷老了的时候,它会变成什么呢?乙:一把扫帚。
A: What will the toothbrush become when it grows older?B: A broom.792. An automobile汽车甲:什么东西由10个字母组成,而且还靠汽油发动?乙:汽车。
A: What has ten letters and starts with gas?B: An automobile.3. Because the bed won 't come to you因为床不会到你这里来孩子:爸爸,我为什么要去床上睡觉?爸爸:因为床不会到你这里来。
Kid: Daddy, why do I have to go to bed?Dad: Because the bed won’t come to you.4. Tonight is the final game今晚是决赛一个男人晚上睡不着,所以他去看医生。
他对医生说:“医生,每天晚上我都在梦中踢足球。
”医生说:“吃这些药,它们会帮助你睡好的。
”男人说:“我不能接受它们,因为今晚是决赛。
”A man could not fall asleep at night, so he went to a doctor. He said to the doctor, “Doctor, every night in my dream I am playing soccer.”The doctor said, “Take these pills. They will help you sleep better.”The man said, “I can’t take them, as tonight is the final game.”5. Because there was extra time因为有加时赛汤姆是一名小学生。
English Jokes1.Which woman?One evening I drove my husband's car to the shopping mall. On my return, I noticed that how dusty the outside of his car was and cleaned it up a bit. When I finally entered the house, I called out. "The woman who loves you the most in the world just cleaned your headlights and windshield." My husband looked up and said, "Mom's here?"哪一位女人?一天晚上我开着丈夫的车去购物,回来后发现车身沾满灰尘,于是擦洗了一阵。
当我终于走进屋里时大声喊:“世界上最爱你的女人刚擦洗了你的车灯和挡风玻璃。
” 我丈夫抬头看了看,说:“妈妈来了?”2. The reds or the greens?Two apples up in a tree were looking down on the world.The first apple said,“Look at all those people fighting,robbing,rioting --no one seems willing to get along with his fellow man.Some day we apples will be the only ones left.Then we'll rule the world.”Replied the second apple,“Which of us --the reds or the greens?”红的还是绿的?树上的两只苹果俯瞰着世界。
20个英语笑话爆笑超短1.Why don’t scientists trust atoms?Because they make up everything!2.I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.3.What did the grape say after the elephant sat on it? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.4.How does a penguin build its house?Igloos it together!5.Why don’t skeletons fight each other?They don’t have the guts!6.Why don’t scientists trust atoms?Because they make up everything!7.Why did the scarecrow win an award?Because he was outstanding in his field!8.Why don’t eggs tell jokes?Because they might crack up!9.Why was the math book sad?Because it had too many problems!10.What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?An abdominal snowman!11.Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?It was two-tired!12.How does a cucumber become a pickle?It goes through a jarring experience!13.What do you call a bear with no teeth?A gummy bear!14.Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek?Because he was always spotted!15.Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negativenumbers?He will stop at nothing to avoid them!16.Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay?Because then they would be bagels!17.What kind of tree fits in your hand?A palm tree!18.Why don’t cannibals eat clowns?Because they taste funny!19.How do you organize a space party?You planet!20.Why don’t scientists trust atoms?Because they make up everything!以上是20个英语笑话爆笑超短的集合。
情话英语笑话带翻译Title: Funny English Jokes with Love Phrases and Translation。
Love and humor go hand in hand, and what better way to express your love than through a good laugh? Here are some funny English jokes with love phrases that will surely make your loved one smile.1. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!Translation: 为什么西红柿变红了?因为它看到了沙拉酱!This joke is a playful way to say that seeing your loved one makes your heart skip a beat and your face turn red.2. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.Translation: 被踩到的葡萄说了什么?什么也没说,只是流了点酒。
This joke is a cute way to say that even when things don't go as planned, you can still make the best of it and have a good time with your loved one.3. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert? Because it was already stuffed.Translation: 为什么泰迪熊拒绝吃甜点?因为它已经吃饱了。
What is brown and sticky?
A stick!
Why is six afraid of seven?
Because seven ate nine.
Why do ducks have flat feet?
To stamp out forest fires.
Why do elephants have flat feet?
To stamp out flaming ducks.
Guy in a library walks up to the librarian and says, “I’ll have a cheeseburger and fries, please.”Librarian responds, “Sir, you know you’re in a library, right?”
Guy says, “Oh, sorry. [in a whisper] I’ll have a cheeseburger and fries, please.”
Lady sits down on a train. Man sitting next to her turns to her and says, “Lady, that is the ugliest baby I have ever seen. That baby looks in a mirror, it’s going to shatter. You oughta put a bag on that baby’s head. That baby is just ugly.”
The woman, horrified, stands up and shouts for the conductor. “Conduc tor, this man has insulted me.”
“I’m so sorry, ma’am,” the conductor replies. “What he did is totally unacceptable on this train. I will deal with him later, but for now, please come with me. We’ll give you a nice seat in the first-class carriage — and a b anana for your monkey.”
Why did Tiger stick his head in the toilet?
Because he is looking for pooh.
There are two muffins in an oven.
One muffin turns to the other muffin and says,
“Boy, it’s hot in here.”
The other muffin sa ys, “OH MY GOD A TALKING
MUFFIN!”
What did one eye say to the other eye?
Don’t look now, but something between us smells.
A boy asks his father, “Dad, are bugs good to eat?”
“That’s disgusting —don’t talk about things like that
over dinner,” the dad replies.
After dinner the father asks, “Now, son, what did you
want to ask me?”
“Oh, nothing,” the boy says. “There was a bug in your
soup, but now it’s gone.”
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went camping.
They pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep. Sometime in the middle of the night Holmes woke Watson up and said: “Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you see.”Watson replied: “I see millions and millions of stars.”
Holmes said: “And what do you deduce from that?”
Watson replied: “W ell, if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it’s quite likely there are some planets like Earth out there. And if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life.”
And Holmes said: “Watson, you idiot, it means that somebody stole our tent.”。