Big Bang Theory Transcripts
S3E06 – The Cornhusker Vortex
Scene: The stairwell. The guys are carrying kites.
Leonard: Kites, ho!
Howard: Kites ho!
Raj: Kites ho!
All three: Kites, ho!
Sheldon: Excuse me. You’re misusing the word ho. It’s an interjection used to call attention to a destination, not an object, as in, uh, Land, ho! Or, uh, Westward, ho!
The three guys: Kites, ho!
Penny: Hey, guys. What you doing? Going out to discover electricity?
Sheldon:If you’re referring to the work of Benjamin Franklin, he did not discover electricity, he merely used a kite to determine that lightning consists of electricity. He also invented the Franklin stove, bifocals and the flexible urinary catheter. Kites, ho.
Leonard: We’re heading out for some kite fighting. Penny: Kite fighting?
Leonard:Oh, yeah. It’s an extremely competitive, cutthroat sport.
Sheldon: Well, actually, the risk of throat cutting is very low. On the other hand, severe string burn is a real and ever-Present danger.
Leonard: You want to come watch?
Penny: Oh, gee, sounds amazing, but, um, I’ve got some friends coming over. Not a big thing, we’re just gonna watch the Nebraska game.
Leonard: Oh. Football, sure.
Howard: Good guess.
Penny:I would’ve invited you, but I know you’re not a football fan.
Leonard: No, no, I’m not, so, great. You’ve got plans doing something you like, I’ve got plans doing something I like, so it’s good.
Penny:Well, maybe we’ll hang out later, you know, after everybody’s gone.
Leonard: Yeah, great.
Penny: See ya.
Leonard: Well, this sucks.
Sheldon:I’m sorry, I got bored and drifted off. Where exactly in the interaction did the sucking lie? Raj:Leonard just realized that Penny’s been hiding him from her friends because he’s a tiny, little man who flies kites.
Sheldon: Oh, that certainly would suck.
Credits sequence.
Scene: The park.
Sheldon: Wolowitz is trying to outflank us. Let out some string, add altitude and I’ll go under and cut his line.
Leonard: Why wouldn’t Penny want her friends to meet me?
Sheldon: Focus, Leonard, focus! The heat of battle is upon us, the dogs of war are unleashed. Leonard: Maybe Koothrappali’s right, maybe I embarrass her.
Sheldon: You’re embarrassing me right now, a grown man worrying about such nonsense when in the middle of flying kites.
Leonard: Sorry.
Sheldon: Sorry won’t bring their kites down. Ow! String burn! String burn!
Raj: Oh, they think we’re flanking, they’re playing right into our hands. On the count of three, we execute the flying scissor. One, two…
Howard: Whoa! Did you see that?
Raj: See what?
Howard: That chick, she smiled at me.
Raj: No, she didn’t.
Howard: Yes, she did.
Raj: Come on, scissors, scissors!
Howard: Hold my line.
Raj:Wait, what are you doing? I can’t scissors by myself! Howard! Come back!
Sheldon: Victory!
Raj: Son of a bitch.
Scene: Leonard’s car.
Raj: You’re a sucky friend, you know that? A sucky, sucky friend.
Howard: What was I supposed to do? She gave me that come-hither look.
Raj: If she gave you any look at l. It was a you suck look.
Howard: I would’ve caught up to her if I hadn’t pulled a hammy.
Raj:Oh, please, you weigh 80 pounds. You don’t have a hammy.
