绝望的主妇第一季第三集中英对照剧本,学习笔记

2009-07-06 12:06绝望的主妇经典台词第一季 Desperate Housewives Season 1 1-01 The next day my friends came together to pack away my clothes, my personal belongings and what was left of my life. Not quite Gabrielle, not quite. How ironic. To have something I tried so desperately to keep secret treated so causally. I'm so sorry, girls. I never wanted you to burden with this.第二天我的朋友们都来帮我收拾衣服，私人物品还有――我剩下的那些东西。

远不只这些Gabrielle，远不只。

多么讽刺，我拼命努力想要保守的秘密就这样随便的被她们发现了。

对不起，姐妹们。

我绝对不想让你们承受这种负担。

1-02Ah, But Underneath Yes, as I look back at the world I left behind, it's all so clear to me. The beauty that waits to be unveiled, the mysteries that long to be uncovered. But, people so rarely stop to take a look. They just keep moving. It's a shame, really. There's so much to see. 是的，当我回头看我身后的世界，它变得如此清晰。

那么多期待闪亮登场的美丽，那么多渴望不被发现的秘密。

绝望的主妇经典台词S01E01An odd thing happens when we die. Taste, touch, smell, and sound become a distant memory, but our sight --ah, our sight expands, and we can suddenly see the world we've left behind so clearly. Of course, most of what's visible to the dead could also be seen by the living, if they'd only take the time to look. 我们死去以后就会有奇怪的事情发生，我们的感觉消失了，味觉、触觉和听觉都成为遥远的回忆，但是我们的视觉，它变得开阔了。

我们能突然把被我们扔在身后的这个世界看清楚。

当然，大多数死人能看见的世界，活着的人也能看清楚，只要他们愿意花时间去看。

S01E02As I look back at the world I left behind, it's all so clear to me: the beauty that waits to be unveiled, the mysteries that long to be uncovered. But people so rarely stop to take a look, they just keep moving. It‟s a shame really, there‟s so much to see.当我回头看看身后这个世界时；我看的如此清晰。

有那么多有待发现的美丽；和那么多有待揭幕的神秘；但是人们很少会停下来看上一眼。

他们只是不停的往前走，这真的很遗憾。

有那么多值得一看的东西！S01E03Yes, I remember the world --every detail. And what I remember most is how afraid I was. What a waste. You see, to live in fear is not to live at all. I wish I could tell this to those I left behind, but would it do any good? Probably not. I understand now -- there will always be those who face their fears... and there will always be those who run away.是的，我记得这个世界的每一个细节；而我记的最多的是我有多害怕；真是浪费。

绝望的主妇第一季第三集中英对照剧本,学习笔记Season 1, Episode 3: Pretty Little Picture-Announcer: Previously on Desperate Housewives, Susan took dating tips from her 12 year old daughter.previously: 先前，以前 desperate: 绝望的，不顾一切的dating: 约会 tip: 告诫，提示前情提要 Susan从她12岁的女儿那儿学到一些约会的小窍门。

-Julie: If yo u wanna date him, you’re gonna have to ask him out.date: 和…约会gonna=going to: 将要have to: 不得不，必须ask…out: 邀请某人外出如果你想跟他约会，你就该约他出去-Susan: I keep hoping he’ll ask me ou t. 我一直希望他能来邀请我-Julie: How’s that going? 结果怎样？-Announcer: Bree accidentally poisoned her husband. Bree 不小心毒到了她丈夫accidentally: 意外地，偶然地 poison: 放毒于-Rex: I can’t believe you tried to kill me.我真不敢相信你想杀了我try to: 设法-Bree: Yes, well, I feel badly about that. 是啊，我非常抱歉-Announcer: Lynette indulged in creative parenting? Lynette 沉湎于启发式家长养育indulge in: 沉溺于 creative: 创造性的 parenting: 养育，抚养-Lynette: If any of you acts up, I will call Santa and tell him you want socks for Christmas. act up: 耍脾气,捣蛋 Santa: 圣诞老人sock: 袜子你们中任何一个再调皮的话，我就告诉圣诞老人你们不想要圣诞礼物了-Gabrielle: I really hate the way you talk to me. 我真讨厌你对我说话的方式talk to sb.:同…说话-Carlos: And I really hate that I spent $15,000 on your diamond necklace.spend on: 把…花在… diamond: 砖石 necklace: 项链我真痛心花了15000元在你的砖石项链上-Announcer: while Gabrielle indulged in the company of her gardener.company: 陪伴 gardener: 园丁当Gabrielle沉湎于她园丁的陪伴-Gabrielle: Hi honey, you’re home early. 嗨，亲爱的，你回来真早-Announcer: And everybody’s wondering? 每个人都在想wonder: 想知道-Susan: Oh Mary Alice, what did you do? Mary Alice，你到底干了些什么？-Announcer: why their best friend just killed herself. 为什么他们最好的朋友会自杀？-Bree: How much do we really wanna know about our neighbors?我们真正了解我们的邻居多少呢？-Announcer: Everyone has a little dirty laundry. 每个人都有一些不可告人之事laundry: 待洗的衣服dirty laundry: 字面意思为“要洗的脏衣服”，深层意思是“不可告人的秘密”-Narrator: After I died, I began to surrender the parts of myself that were no longer necessary. begin to: 开始 surrender: 交出，交给 no longer: 不在，再也不在我死后，我呈交出自己不再需要的部分。

绝望地主妇第一季中英文台词对照第一集(Season 1, Episode 1)场景：主角颖儿和她的家人坐在客厅里，看电视。

颖儿：嗨，大家好！我是颖儿。

欢迎来到《绝望地主妇》。

费德勒：颖儿，你在看啥？Ying'er, what are you watching?颖儿：我正在看这个超级有趣的美剧。

里面的妇女们生活在一个美丽而又疯狂的社区里。

费德勒：听起来有意思。

可以借我看吗？Sounds interesting. Can I borrow it?颖儿：当然可以！但我保证你会上瘾的。

Of course! But I guarantee you'll get addicted.（几个小时后，费德勒一直盯着电视屏幕）费德勒：这个剧真的太好笑了！我下次会继续看的。

场景：颖儿和她的邻居在社区的咖啡厅见面。

颖儿：嘿，安妮！最近怎么样？Hey, Anne! How have you been?安妮：哎呀，我最近有点闷。

孩子们总是让我手忙脚乱。

颖儿：我明白。

生活中总有一些烦恼。

你有没有想过要做些什么让自己开心的事情？I understand. There are always some worries in life. Have you thought about doing something that makes you happy?安妮：没错。

我一直想学做糕点，但从来没有开始过。

True. I've always wanted to learn how to bake, but I never started.颖儿：那就现在开始吧！我可以帮你找一些食谱。

Then start now! I can help you find some recipes.场景：颖儿和她的丈夫人在餐厅用餐。

颖儿：亲爱的，我想打工。

我们需要更多的经济支持。

Honey, I want to get a job. We need more financial support.丈夫：但你应该是家庭主妇啊。

1X03: PRETTY LITTLE PICTUREOriginal Airdate on ABC: October 17, 2004ANNOUNCER: Previously on Desperate Housewives, Susan took dating tips from her 12 year old daughter.JULIE: If you wanna date him, you're gonna have to ask him out.SUSAN: I keep hoping he'll ask me out.JULIE: How's that going?(Cut to: )ANNOUNCER: Bree accidentally poisoned her husband.REX: I can't believe you tried to kill me.BREE: Yes, well, I feel badly about that.(Cut to: )ANNOUNCER: Lynette indulged in creative parenting.LYNETTE: If any of you acts up, I will call Santa and tell him you want socks for Christmas.(Cut to: )GABRIELLE: I really hate the way you talk to me.CARLOS: And I really hate that I spent $15,000 on your diamond necklace. ANNOUNCER: While Gabrielle indulged in the company of her gardener.(Cut to: GABRIELLE, pushing a half-naked JOHN out the window, as CARLOS walks in the house.)GABRIELLE: Hi honey, you're home early.(Cut to: )ANNOUNCER: And everybody's wondering?(Cut to: SUSAN, holding the mysterious noteI KNOW WHAT YOU DIDIT MAKES ME SICKI'M GOING TO TELLSUSAN: Oh Mary Alice, what did you do?ANNOUNCER: Why their best friend just killed herself.BREE: How much do we really wanna know about our neighbours?(Cut to: MIKE, putting down a gun on his side table.Cut to: The mysterious chest PAUL dumped in the river floating up to the surface. ANNOUNCER: Everyone has a little dirty laundry.(Fade out)OPEN ON: [INT. CREMATORIUM -- NIGHT](We open on MARY ALICE, lying in a coffin. A coffin cover, with a label "MARY ALICE YOUNG" is slid over the top. A hand turns a knob, and we see cogs turning as a furnace is opened, and the coffin slides into the furnace.)NARRATOR: After I died, I began to surrender the parts of myself that were no longer necessary. My desires, beliefs, ambitions, doubts, every trace of my humanity was discarded. I discovered when moving through eternity, it helps to travel lightly. In fact, I held on to only one thing - my memory.[CUT TO: EXT. WISTERIA LANE -- NIGHT](We pan down on the peaceful Wisteria Lane at night, where everyone is fast asleep in their houses.)[PAN TO: INT. VAN DE KAMP HOUSE -- NIGHT](We pan to BREE lying in bed awake, drumming her fingers.)NARRATOR: It's astonishing to look back on the world I left behind. I remember it all, every single detail. Like my friend, Bree Van De Kamp.(Flashback to: MARY ALICE at BREE's house, talking animatedly as BREE walks in with an easy smile, holding a dish in her hands.)NARRATOR: I remember the easy confidence of her smile.(Cut to: BREE standing at the head of the table, where REX, PAUL and MARY ALICE are sitting. They watch as she drizzles some alcohol over a dish, and lights it on fire.) NARRATOR: the gentle elegance of her hands.MARY ALICE: Wow.(Cut to: MARY ALICE and PAUL leaving, as they say their goodbyes at the front door.) NARRATOR: the refined warmth of her voice.BREE: Bye.NARRATOR: But what I remember most about Bree?BREE: Rex, wasn't that a lovely? (Her smile fades as she sees REX walking off, completely ignoring what she's saying.)NARRATOR: was the look of fear in her eyes.(End of flashback. Resume present)NARRATOR: Bree had started to realize her world was unravelling, and for a woman who despised loose ends, that was unacceptable.(BREE looks at the clock, which reads 5:35 am. She gets out of bed, and goes downstairs. We see her wearing a robe, bending over REX, sleeping downstairs on the couch. She shakes him awake.)BREE: Rex, Rex! You need to get up!REX: It's not even light out.BREE: Please hurry, if the kids see you sleeping down here, they're gonna start asking questions. (takes REX's blanket off him.)REX: Let'em ask, I don't care anymore.BREE: Well, I care. (pulls his pillow out from underneath his head.) They don't need to be burdened with our marital problems, and if we're working things out, the least we could do is try to keep up appearances.REX: (rolls his eyes) Oh yeah, appearances. I keep forgetting about appearances. BREE: Oh Rex, you look so tired.REX: Ah, I didn't sleep. This damn thing is so uncomfortable.BREE: Well, why don't you move back upstairs and sleep in our bed?REX: We're in marriage counseling, Bree, I think that would confuse things. BREE: It's just-I miss you.REX: I know you do. Of course, if I don't get some sleep pretty soon, I'll be forced to move back upstairs out of sheer exhaustion. (goes upstairs)(BREE waits till he moves out of sight, then goes to a cupboard and takes out a pairof pliers. She flips one corner of the mattress up, and cuts one of the wires in half. She bends both sides up so they are vertical. She tests how sharp it is with one finger, then pulls the mattress back on top of the sofa-bed, dusting her hands off and sighing with satisfaction. Teehee. Evil Bree rocks.)NARRATOR: Yes, Bree was afraid of many things. But if there was one thing she wasn't afraid of, it was a challenge.Opening CreditsOPEN ON: [EXT. WISTERIA LANE -- MORNING](We pan on our Wisteria Lane, at the crack of dawn. The street lights are still on, and there's a paper boy on a bike, throwing papers onto the lawns.)NARRATOR: The day on Wisteria Lane began like any other, with a cup of coffee and the morning paper.[CUT TO: INT. SCAVO HOUSE - KITCHEN](We see LYNETTE sitting at the kitchen table, the twins sword-fighting next to her as she reads the business section of the paper.)LYNETTE: Just give me a second-5 minutes.NARRATOR: And while Lynette read the business section-[PAN TO: INT. SOLIS HOUSE - DINING ROOM](GABRIELLE sits at her dining table, holding a cup up in her right hand, as her maid pours coffee into the cup. She is engrossed in reading the paper, held by her left hand, the style section.)NARRATOR: And Gabrielle studied the fall collections-[PAN TO: INT. VAN DE KAMP HOUSE - DINING ROOM](BREE sits at the dining table, reading the section of the paper. She fiddles with the flower arrangement in the middle of the table in front of her.)NARRATOR: And Bree searched for decorating ideas.[PAN TO: INT. MEYER HOUSE - KITCHEN]NARRATOR: Susan scanned the front page and saw something that caught her eye. (SUSAN and JULIE are sitting at the kitchen table. SUSAN reads the front page of the paper, taking a bite of a muffin. JULIE wipes something off Susan’s face, then goes back to eating her cereal, reading a book open in front of her. SUSAN suddenly stops, as the camera pans to look at the paper.It reads:The Fairview HeraldOctober 15, 2004She looks up, then gets up and goes to a calendar hanging on the wall. She flips open to October, where we see a post-it note, reading Mary Alice dinnerstuck on the 15th and 16th dates. She rips it off.)[CUT TO: EXT. SCAVO HOUSE -- MORNING](SUSAN steps over toys lying scattered everywhere on the ground and front porch. She goes to the front door of the house, and knocks on the window pane on the door. The door opens to (Flashback to: MARY ALICE opening the door.)MARY ALICE: Well, it's about time.SUSAN: Be nice, I come bearing snacks. (holds up a bag of chips and a bag ofpretzels, walking in the door as MARY ALICE follows her into the kitchen table, where LYNETTE, BREE and GABRIELLE are gathered.)BREE: Lynette, these cards are sticky.LYNETTE: I know. Preston used the three of diamonds to scoop jam out of the jar. GABRIELLE: Gorgeous, thankful we have 49 cards to play with.SUSAN: Hello, sorry I'm late.LYNETTE: Hey.MARY ALICE: So, Susan, I was just telling the girls I wanna throw a dinner party. SUSAN: Really?MARY ALICE: Yes, I mean, how long have we all lived on this street? We've never done a big group thing.BREE: I think it's a great idea.MARY ALICE: Paul never likes to have people over. Well, to heck with him, I'm doing it.SUSAN: So when is this shindig?MARY ALICE: How about a month from tonight? That would be the 16th, good for everyone?LYNETTE: Yeah.SUSAN: Yeah.BREE: Works for me. Should we all make something?MARY ALICE: Oh no, no. This is my party. I've been wanting to have everyone over for years. Oh I'm so happy we're finally doing this. It's gonna be so much fun. (End of Flashback. Resume to present.)(LYNETTE opens the door.)LYNETTE: Hey! (SUSAN holds up the post-it note) I know, our dinner.[CUT TO: EXT. WISTERIA LANE -- MORNING](BREE, LYNETTE, GABRIELLE and SUSAN are standing outside on the street, next to a large tree. GABRIELLE passes the note along back to SUSAN, who holds it up.) SUSAN: How could we have all forgotten about this?LYNETTE: We didn't exactly forget, it's just usually when the hostess dies, the party's off.BREE: Lynette! (puts her hand over her heart)LYNETTE: I'm not being flip, I'm just pointing out a reality.GABRIELLE: Mary Alice was so excited about it. So sad.SUSAN: I think we should go through with it.BREE: Really? Wouldn't that be in poor taste?SUSAN: No, it's sort of a way to honour Mary Alice. It was so important to her. GABRIELLE: We could all use a fun night.BREE: Well, good, because I have some new flatbread that I've just been dying to show off.SUSAN: Lynette?LYNETTE: I'm in.BREE: I'll make braised lamb shanks.LYNETTE: I'm still in.BREE: So how many will I be cooking for?GABRIELLE: 7. Three couples and Susan. Does that sound right?SUSAN: No, it sounds very, very wrong.GABRIELLE: Awww. (puts a hand on Susan’s shoulder)BREE: Is there somebody you'd like to invite?(MIKE runs past, stops a distance away from SUSAN as he sees her, all sweaty and panting. SUSAN smiles at him, waving as he smiles back, waving, then keeps running.)SUSAN: I have an idea. (they all smile)[CUT TO: INT. SOLIS HOUSE -- MORNING]CARLOS: A dinner party. Honey, I may be working late. The Dillman proposal's a complete mess.GABRIELLE: No, you promise to be home every night this week.CARLOS: I'm trying, but I can't guarantee anything. This is business! GABRIELLE: Says the prince as he rides off into the sunset. Boy did the movies ever get that wrong.CARLOS: You know what your problem is? You're very tense. Should go to a spa, go shopping. Find a way to relax.(GABRIELLE smiles slyly as he walks out the door. She picks up the phone and dials a number. Our view of GABRIELLE moves to the right, as the left side of the screen opens up to JOHN in class, picking up his phone.)JOHN: Hello?GABRIELLE: Where are you?JOHN: Algebra.GABRIELLE: You free at 4?JOHN: I'm not sure, I got track after school.GABRIELLE: Well, get here as fast as you can. My husband says I need to relax. JOHN: You, uh, want me to keep my gym clothes on, like last time? GABRIELLE: If you would. Please. (They both smile)[CUT TO:INT. SCAVO HOUSE - KITCHEN](TOM sits at the kitchen table as LYNETTE does the laundry.)TOM: A dinner party?LYNETTE: Yeah, it'll be fun. Bree's cooking, everyone's coming.TOM: You know what? I haven't even had a chance to unpack yet, honey. I just, uh, I just need to chill out for the next few days.LYNETTE: Oh. Tom. There'll be liquor. And hors d'oeuvres. And grown-ups without children. And, and silverware. Remember silverware?TOM: Honey, can you take this in for me? (hands LYNETTE a camera) LYNETTE: (takes the camera from him) Have you heard anything I just said? TOM: Yeah, honey, I'm sorry. I'm just, I'm wiped out. Three cities in 6 days, my head is just pounding. I'm not ready for a dinner party.LYNETTE: I already got a sitter.TOM: Can you cancel her? (LYNETTE makes a shocked sound) Please? Look, let's just stay in tomorrow night. We can get a bottle of wine, and rent a video, and I justwanna hang out with my best gal. That's all.LYNETTE: I was looking so forward to a night out.TOM: I know, sweetie, I'm sorry, but I, I'm beat. I mean, do you remember what it's like to work a 60- hour week? (tosses a pair of socks into the laundry basket LYNTTE is holding and gets up, grabbing his briefcase and walking away.)(LYNETTE just stands there, looking at him as he walks away.)[CUT TO: INT. VAN DE KAMP HOUSE - KITCHEN]REX: A dinner party? Do I have to go?BREE: Well, given that we're hosting it, I say so. By the way, you won't be drinking at this party.REX: Why's that?BREE: Because when you drink, you get chatty. No one needs to know that we're seeing Dr. Goldfine.REX: You know, if you spent half as much time working on our problems as you do covering them?BREE: Not a drop!REX: You know, this-this is ridiculous! This whole thing about us taking tennis lessons.BREE: Well, the nurses at your office may start wondering why you're disappearing three times a week. Tennis lessons are a plausible alibi. (hands REX a lunch bag) REX: So these tennis lessons we're taking. How we doing?BREE: My backhand's improving immensely, but you're still having problems with your serve.REX: Of course.[CUT TO: EXT. MEYER HOUSE -- MORNING]KARL: A dinner party?SUSAN: It's tomorrow night, so if you could just keep Julie an extra day.KARL: Fine, but that's all. Brandy and I leave Sunday for a week up at the cabin. SUSAN: What cabin?KARL: Brandy wanted someplace where we could get away. (turns to wink at BRANDI)(BRANDI is leaning against the red car, drinking from a can. She waves back, smiling at KARL.)KARL: Escrow just closed yesterday.SUSAN: You can afford a cabin, but you can't scrape up child support?KARL: The cheque is in the mail.SUSAN: (opens the mailbox and looks in) Uh, no, it's not!JULIE: (comes out the front door) I found my dental guard. I'm ready.(JULIE looks at KARL and SUSAN, who both look down awkwardly.)JULIE: Stop fighting.SUSAN: We are being as nice as we possibly can to one another.JULIE: Like I said, stop fighting. (gives SUSAN a kiss as she walks to KARL's car) (BRANDI throws her drink can towards the rubbish bin. She misses, and it rolls to the ground in front of SUSAN.)SUSAN: Excuse me. Brandy. (points at the can) Do you mind?BRANDI: Oh. Okay.KARL: Uh, Susan. You're right there, you can pick it up.SUSAN: I could, but she's the one who threw it.KARL: Come on, don't be petulant. Just pick up the stupid can.(JULIE looks at KARL, seeing what's coming as it's about to escalate.)SUSAN: No.JULIE: I can pick it up.SUSAN: Honey, stay out of this.KARL: Fine. (walks towards SUSAN, about to pick up the can) This is so typical. SUSAN: (kicks the can against Karl’s legs) Oh, sorry. Was that petulant too? KARL: You know what? Pick up the damn can yourself.SUSAN: Yeah, well you just go to hell. (picks the can against the car, which rolls down the driveway and stops at MIKE and Bongo's feet.)MIKE: You want me to pick it up? (grins at SUSAN)SUSAN: Uh-(gestures helplessly)[CUT TO: INT. YOUNG HOUSE - DINING TABLE](ZACH and PAUL are sitting at the table. PAUL is reading the paper.)ZACH: Mrs. Formington said she looked for Mum's obituary, couldn't find it. Did you put one in?PAUL: (sighs) I've had other things on my mind, Zach.ZACH: But how could you not do that? People will think we didn't care about her. PAUL: I doubt people will give it much thought. Don't worry about it.ZACH: You never talk about her. She hasn't been dead a month, and it's like you totally forgot she ever existed.PAUL: It's a little early for this kind of talk.ZACH: Maybe when you die, I won't put in an obituary.PAUL: That will be your choice to make. Assuming you outlive me.[CUT TO: INT. SOLIS HOUSE - DINING ROOM](GABRIELLE is on the phone with her mother. She picks up a glass of orange juice from the dining table.)GABRIELLE: Mum, it's no big deal. Carlos and I will drive in for the baptism. Problem solved. (hears a tap on the front door, and goes to open the door for JOHN) Okay. Fine. You go with Aunt Maria, and I will take Nana to church. (whispers to John) Take your clothes off. Uh huh. I gotta go, Mum. Yes, right now. Okay. Uh, you can give me directions later. Bye. (puts down the phone) Hi, how was school? JOHN: Got an A minus on my biology exam.GABRIELLE: You did. Well, let's see what you've learned. (Gasps as she looks at the front door to see a little girl peering at her and JOHN kissing)JOHN: Who's that?GABRIELLE: I don't know. (goes towards the front door as the little girl runs away) Hey! YouLYNETTE: So did Mike say anything?SUSAN: No, but god, you should've seen the look on his face.LYNETTE: I'm sure it's not that bad. He's coming to the party, right?SUSAN: I left three messages. Oh, he's not gonna come. Big surprise. I did everything but foam at the mouth. God, I hate when I get that way. It's like every time I get within 10 feet of Karl, I just become this monster.LYNETTE: You know what, it's not gonna change until you resolve your issues with that man.SUSAN: What, you mean forgive him?LYNETTE: Yeah.SUSAN: You know, I've lived with this bitterness so long, I think I'd be lonely without it.LYNETTE: Honey. Get a pet. See ya. (looks through a stack of photos, stopping at one.) Son of a-?(Cut to: LYNETTE throwing a photo of TOM at a Mexican party with two other men, in front of TOM)TOM: It's a business meeting!LYNETTE: It's a frat party.TOM: Regional manager, corporate manager, head of sales.LYNETTE: Margarita, cigar, sombrero.TOM: Ooh, look, honey, what do you want me to do? Sit around the hotel the whole time, watching cable?LYNETTE: No! But when I say, we've been invited to a party, don't whine about your exhausting 60-hour week. Put on your dancing shoes, and take the mother of your children out for a good time.TOM: Fine, you know what? Let's go to that party. (goes to the fridge, and takes out a pack of jelly and a spoon)LYNETTE: Can't, I already cancelled the sitter.TOM: Okay, well we'll throw the next one.LYNETTE: Throw a dinner party? I don't even have time to wash my face. No, you know what? I'm gonna go to this one. You can stay home and baby-sit the kids. TOM: Fine. I can handle that. (puts the spoon in his mouth as he tries to open the jelly pack)(LYNETTE watches as TOM fiddles around with the jelly, unable to open it. She walks over and takes it from him, opening it with one swift pull. She walks off.)TOM: Thank you.[CUT TO: EXT. WISTERIA LANE](GABRIELLE is driving around in her black car with the top down. She pulls into her driveway to see CARLOS crouching in front of the little girl. They shake hands and talk as GABRIELLE gets out and walks over to CARLOS.)NARRATOR: Gabrielle spent her morning searching for the mysterious little girl. Sadly for her, the mystery was solved a bit too quickly.GABRIELLE: Hey! What's going on?CARLOS: Have you met Ashley?Neighbour: Found it! (walks up with a ball in her hands)CARLOS: Babe, this is Sheila Bukowski, our new neighbour. They just moved into the Miller's old house.SHEILA: My daughter just left her ball in your yard. I'm so sorry.GABRIELLE: Oh, oh, no problem. Nice to meet you, Ashley.SHEILA: She's shy, she doesn't say much.CARLOS: Yeah, well I can see her little mind working away. (laughs)SHEILA: Nice meeting you. Come on, Ashley.[CUT TO: INT. YOUNG HOUSE - GARAGE](Zach goes into his garage at his house. He goes to a shelf, moving a box off and setting it down on another bench. He spots a small white box behind it, and takes it out, opening the box. He slowly takes out a gun, the one his mother used to kill herself. He looks at it.)[CUT TO: INT. DR. GOLDFINE'S OFFICE - COUNSELLING ROOM](BREE and REX are sitting on the couch in front of DR. GOLDFINE.)BREE: Private sessions? I don't understand, why do we need private sessions? DR. GOLDFINE: Private sessions allow us to work on the personal issues of both partners.BREE: Oh, well I don't have any personal issues. My only issue is that my husband wants to leave me, and how can I work on that if he's not in the room?REX: There are things I need to discuss with Dr. Goldfine, and I can't have you there. BREE: Why? I'm your wife, you can say anything in front of me. All we need is a few more sessions, and I'm sure we can.REX: Damn it, Bree! A few more sessions isn't gonna fix us. This is bigger than that. (BREE looks at REX, crestfallen.)DR. GOLDFINE: Why don't we do it this way? Rex, you can take the first half hour. Bree, you can take the second.BREE: Fine. Oh, and Doctor. If what he's about to discuss has anything to do with adultery, prostitution or internet pornography, I would really appreciate you taking a moral hardline. (gets up, holding a tennis racket, and walks out to the waiting room.)[CUT TO: EXT. WISTERIA LANE - SIDEWALK](ASHLEY is sitting on the sidewalk, drawing with chalk on the sidewalk as GABRIELLE walks up to her tentatively.)GABRIELLE: Hi, Ashley. Remember me? We met earlier?(ASHLEY looks up at her, bored, then looks back down at her drawing.) GABRIELLE: Wow, aren't you the little artist. What are those, flamingos? ASHLEY: (sullenly) No.GABRIELLE: (taken aback) Well, they're very pretty. It almost looks like they're kissing. Funny thing about kissing. It's not just for husbands and wives. Sometimes we kiss our mum, or our grandpa. Sometimes we even kiss our dog. Sometimes we even kiss people who are just our friends. Kinda like, a hi-five on the lips. Right?(holds up her hand for a hi-five. When ASHLEY doesn't respond, she laughs awkwardly) Hey, Ash. I was at the mall, and I saw this. Thought you might like it. She's Hawaiian. Her name is Princess Kahaluia. And, and I think it means Little Waterfall- Or Big Pond-or something.(ASHLEY looks at the doll, then puts it on her lap as she continues to draw) GABRIELLE: Okay! So we're good. Right?(ASHLEY looks at GABRIELLE again, with an I-don't-believe-you expression on her face. Heh.)GABRIELLE: Okay. Well, you enjoy your new girlfriend. And if there's anything else you need, you just let me know. (turns to walk away)ASHLEY: What I'd really like, is a bike.[CUT TO: INT. YOUNG HOUSE - LIVING ROOM](Paul walks into his darkened living room. He goes to the fridge and opens it, looking inside. Suddenly, he hears a clicking noise. He turns to see Zach sitting on the floor against the couch, holding the gun, turning the empty barrel of the gun. Paul walks over and switches on the table lamp. He looks at ZACH.)PAUL: Where did you find that?ZACH: She used this to kill herself. Why would you keep it? Why?!PAUL: Because I thought we might need it someday.ZACH: For what?PAUL: Protection.ZACH: I wanna talk about Mum.PAUL: You need to take your medication.ZACH: We are going to talk about Mum!(There is a knock at the door. They both look at the door, then back at each other. ZACH puts a finger to his lips, mouthing as he goes to the door. He cracks it open to see BREE standing outside.)BREE: Hello Zach! I hope this isn't a bad time.ZACH: What can I do for you, Mrs. Van De Kamp?BREE: Well, I wanted to invite you and your father to a dinner party tomorrow night. ZACH: I'm not sure where he is right now.BREE: Oh. Well, I'm sorry it's such late notice, but well, we weren't sure whether you and your father were ready for any kind of social engagement yet. But, well, we're, we're sort of throwing it in your mother's honour.ZACH: Really?BREE: Yes, it's just gonna be a casual night with the gang. We're going to eat, and tell fun stories about your mum. (her smile falters as she sees ZACH looking grief-stricken and disturbed) Zach, are-are you okay?PAUL: (appears at the door next to ZACH) Hello, Bree.BREE: Oh hi, Paul, I was just ……PAUL: I heard. Thank you, we already have plans for tomorrow. (takes his hand off Zach’s shoulder and moves it down his back to take the gun from where ZACH is holding it behind his back)BREE: Oh. That's too bad. Well, I should go.ZACH: Thank you. Mrs. Van de Kamp.BREE: For what, Zach?ZACH: For remembering my mum.NARRATOR: That night, Paul gave his son something to calm his nerves.(PAUL has his hand on Zach’s shoulder, and pulls him inside, shutting the door.) [CUT TO: EXT. SOLIS HOUSE](GABRIELLE opens the car trunk, and moves a bike out to put in front of a waiting ASHLEY.)NARRATOR: And the next day, Gabrielle calmed her own nerves by giving something to her new best friend.GABRIELLE: Here you go. Top of the line, free speed, aluminium frame, handlebar ribbons, and a bell. And you'll notice it's royal blue to match your pretty little eyes. ASHLEY: My eyes are green.GABRIELLE: Yeah, well, you'll be cruising so fast on this, no one will even notice. (gives ASHLEY a helmet and props the bike up on the sidewalk) It's all yours, hon. Have fun. (notices ASHLEY isn't moving) What? What's wrong?ASHLEY: I don't know how to ride a bike.GABRIELLE: What? Well, then why did you ask for one?ASHLEY: (shrugs her shoulders) Why can't you show me?GABRIELLE: (laughs) Sure, one of these days.ASHLEY: What's wrong with now?[CUT TO: INT. MEYER HOUSE - STUDY](SUSAN sits at her work desk, flipping through a photo album. We see many picture, where KARL's head is cut out of all the photos.)NARRATOR: After her talk with Lynette, Susan decided to take a look at her old photo album. And she began to see herself in a whole new light. And the picture wasn't flattering.(SUSAN sighs, picking up the phone and dialing a number. We hear KARL's voice mailbox message, yeah, you got Karl. Leave a message. followed by a beep.) SUSAN: Hey Karl, it's me. I was hoping you'll be there. Um, listen, we need to talk. So, maybe when you drop Julie off tomorrow, we could have a moment. It's important. Give my best to-Brandy. Call me.NARRATOR: Susan was proud of herself. She was finally ready to let go of her anger. Well, almost.(SUSAN slides the cut-out head of KARL from underneath one of the pictures. She holds it up, looking at it for a moment until she starts scrunching the head together between her fingers.)[CUT TO: INT. SCAVO HOUSE - KITCHEN](We hear one of the boys yelling for LYNETTE in the background. LYNETTE is wearing a robe with curlers in her hair, and a mask on her face. TOM goes to the fridge and takes out a sports drink.)LYNETTE: The boys will be hungry at 5:30, so put the fish sticks in the toaster oven at 5 o' clock-TOM: -for half an hour. Honey, I know, this is the third time you've told me.LYNETTE: Well, if the food's late, god help you.TOM: Beautiful, I don't need a pamphlet. It's not brain surgery. They're just kids, for god's sake. (goes up the stairs)LYNETTE: Preston, would you come here?PRESTON: Yeah?LYNETTE: Sweetie, you know our rule about eating cookies, right?PRESTON: Yeah, we can't have'em after 5, cause sugar makes us hyper. LYNETTE: Yeah, but tonight, anything goes. (gives PRESTON a box of animal cookies) Make sure you share with your brothers.PRESTON: Thanks Mum! (goes up the stairs)(LYNETTE fixes her curlers, looking proud of herself)[CUT TO: EXT. WISTERIA LANE](We see GABRIELLE tottering along in her heels, as she helps ASHLEY riding along in her bike.)GABRIELLE: Don't look at your feet. Don't look at your feet, look at the road. Look at the road. Ow. Uh, okay, find your balance. Find your balance. Okay, it's all you. It's all you, you're doing great! Okay, stay to the right. Watch the car. Watch the car. Watch the car! (ASHLEY veers to the right of the car, narrowing missing the car, but falling off the bike) Oh god. (runs towards ASHLEY, helping her up) Are you okay? ASHLEY: Yeah. Let's go again.GABRIELLE: (panting) Oh honey. These heels don't have another block in them. ASHLEY: What about tomorrow?GABRIELLE: Well, you won't be around tomorrow, 'cause you have school. ASHLEY: I'm home-schooled. I'm always around.NARRATOR: It was in that moment that Gabrielle realized this ride was far from over. [CUT TO:EXT. MEYER HOUSE - PORCH](We hear a doorbell ring. SUSAN runs to the door with a towel wrapped around her body.)SUSAN: I'm coming! (opens the door to KARL) Karl, what are you doing here? I asked you to come tomorrow.KARL: You said you wanted to talk, it sounded important.SUSAN: Tomorrow! I'm in a towel!KARL: We were married 14 years, I know what's under there. Come on. (walks into the house)SUSAN: I'm not really ready for this, I was gonna have a whole speech prepared. KARL: Brandy and I have plans tomorrow. I suggest you wing it.SUSAN: Oh. Um, okay. Here's the thing, Karl. I was thinking about what happened in the driveway yesterday. And I just don't wanna, I don't wanna live like this. I don't wanna be that kind of person. And I just thought, if the two of us had a nice calm-I need an apology, Karl.KARL: A what?SUSAN: An apology. For the way you ended our marriage. You never took any responsibility for your behaviour.KARL: I don't know what to say, Susan. The heart wants what it wants.。

绝望的主妇中英文台词对照-NARRATOR: My name is Mary Alice Young.我是Mary Alice Young。

When you read this morning's paper, you may come across an article about the unusual day I had last week.come across: 偶然遇到 article: 文章 unusual: 不平常的当你浏览今天的晨报,可能会读到一篇文章关于上个星期我所渡过的不平常的一天。

Normally, there's never anything newsworthy about my life.normally：通常 newsworthy: 有新闻价值的通常,我的生活里是没有什么有新闻报道价值的。

That all changed last Thursday. change: 改变 . 但是上个星期四一切都改变了。

Of course everything seemed as normal at first.of course: 当然 seem: 好像，仿佛 normal: 平常as normal: 照常 at first: 最初，开始时当然,起初,一切看起来都很平常。

I made my breakfast for my family. 我给一家人做好早餐。

-MARY ALICE: Here we are. Waffles.Waffles: 华夫饼干华夫饼来了。

-NARRATOR: I performed my chores. perform: 完成 chore: (家庭或农庄的)杂务，杂活我做好了做家务。

-NARRATOR: I completed my projects. complete: 完成 project: 设计【这里指美化家居】完成我的手工作品。

Episode 01.23 - One Wonderful Day--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Mary Alice Voiceoverreviously on Desperate Housewives:Mary Alice Voiceover:There is a motive to every mystery-Dr. Craig:Your body isn't responding to the medication the way it should.Rex:I think I'm having a heart attack.Mary Alice Voiceover:-evidence of every crime-Gabrielle: They're charging you with a hate crime?Carlos:I thought you were cheating with him.Gabrielle: With our gay cable guy?Carlos:I didn't know he was gay.I didn't know Justin was either.Mary Alice Voiceover:-and an answer to every question.Susan:Gabby, the woman killed herself.Something must have been going on.Mary Alice Voiceover:All you have to do is take a closer look...Policeman #1:... a woman in it.Zach:Woman?Policeman #1:She was all chopped up.Mary Alice Voiceover:...and eventually, every secret...Mikeo you know where Paul Young is?Felicia:I know where he will be on Thursday night.Mary Alice Voiceover:...will be revealed.(Sorry,I can't figure out who says)Mary Alice was being blackmailed?Susan:Oh, Mary Alice, what did you do?--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Mary Alice's House](On a table is a picture of Mary Alice, Bree, Susan, Gabrielle and Lynette hugging and smiling.) Mary Alice Voiceover:"My name is Mary Alice Young, and before I died, my life was filled with love, laughter, friendship, and, sadly, secrets."(Cut to Mary Alice exiting her front door, taking out the trash.)Mary Alice Voiceover:"The secrets had begun fifteen years earlier when my name was Angela Forrest, and I was living a life of quiet desperation."(Cut to Mary Alice serving breakfast to Paul, who is pouring orange juice while sitting at the dining room table.)Mary Alice Voiceover:"I'd feel it every morning as I made breakfast for my husband."Paul: "If you could stop by the market today, that would be great. I'm out of shaving cream." (Cut to Mary Alice in the supermarket parking lot.)Mary Alice Voiceover:"And during the errands I ran in the afternoons."(With a supermarket apron on, a bag boy loads groceries into Mary Alice's car. She hands a tip to him.)Bag Boy: "So Friday's double coupon day. You'll save a bunch if you come on Fridays."Mary Alice Voiceover:"Even at my work every evening."(Cut to Mary Alice at the hospital. She approaches the nurse's station with a file folder. A younger Felicia Tilman is talking to a nurse who is looking at a calendar at the desk.)Nurse: "What a lovely calendar. Was this taken around here?"Felicia: "Oh, no. That's way out in Fairview. I have family there. Isn't it idyllic?"(Mary Alice begins putting files away. Felicia hands her another file.)Felicia: "Here, Angela. You can file this."Mary Alice: "Oh."Mary Alice Voiceover:"To me, each day was gray and meaningless. And then one night, suddenly..."(Cut to Mary Alice taking out the trash. A young woman approaches in the dark, carrying a baby.)Deirdre: "Hey, Angela."Mary Alice Voiceover:"There was color."Mary Alice: "Deirdre. What are you doing here?"Deirdre: "I need some money."(Later, Deirdre looks around Paul and Mary Alice's living room, holding her baby. Paul stands off to the side and Mary Alice brings a glass of water to Deirdre.)Mary Alice: "Deirdre, here."(The baby begins whimpering. Deirdre drinks the water quickly and hands the glass back to Mary Alice. She keeps her reddened eyes averted.)Mary Alice: "You're using again, aren't you?"Deirdre: "No, I just, um, I just got to get some food for my baby and some other stuff."Mary Alice: "Well, if the baby's hungry, we can go to the market and I'll buy food."Deirdre: "I-I can shop for my own baby, okay?"(The baby begins to fret.)Deirdre: "Quiet! I can't think. See this watch? It's worth a lot. I'll give it to you for fifty bucks." Paul: "She's not giving you money."Deirdre: "Do you mind? Angela, you're the only one at rehab who treated me like a person. Okay, please, please don't stop now."Mary Alice: "I'm sorry."(Mary Alice walks to the front door and opens it.)Deirdre: "I'll sell you my baby!"Mary Alice: "What?"Deirdre: "I heard you talking and I know you can't have your own. It's been killing you."Paul: "It's time that you left."Deirdre: "No, I, I'm thinking about Dana. You'll give him a good home. Okay? He'll be better off. Okay? Shh. Quiet. Quiet!"Paul: "Honey!"(Mary Alice holds up her hand to silence Paul.)Deirdre: "How much money do you keep in the house? "(The baby continues to cry. Mary Alice slowly closes the front door.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Clinic](Paramedics roll in a gurney carrying an unconscious Deirdre.)Felicia: "She has a ten-month-old baby. Where the hell is it?"Policeman: "I don't know. If we'd seen a kid, we certainly wouldn't have left it sitting in the middle of a crack house."Felicia: "If anything happens to that child, I will have your badge."(Mary Alice stands close by, listening to the conversation.)Policeman: "Just let me do my job, huh? We'll post an Officer at the junkie's bedside. If she wakes up, we'll let her tell us where she left her kid."(Deirdre's gurney is rolled out the room. Mary Alice's eyes focus on the calendar hanging at the nurse's station. She looks at the picture of a group of houses in the town of Fairview.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Mary Alice's House](A realtor comes out of the house, greeting Paul, Mary Alice, and young Dana.)Realtor: "I really do hope you folks will be happy here in Fairview."Paul: "Thank you."Mary Alice Voiceover:"And we were."Mary Alice: "Wave bye, Zach. Wave bye-bye."Mary Alice Voiceover:"We were as happy as any family could be."(Mary Alice and Paul smile at each other, then enter their new home.)Mary Alice Voiceover:"Until one night three years later..."(Hard knocking on the door late at night.)Mary Alice Voiceover:"When there was a knock at our door and I was desperate once again." (Mary Alice opens the front door. Deirdre is standing there.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------CREDITS--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Wisteria Lane, Nighttime]Mary Alice Voiceover:"It was five o'clock in the morning on Wisteria Lane when the phone calls started."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Susan's House](The telephone rings. Susan rolls over in bed to pick up the phone.)Mary Alice Voiceover:"Of course, each of them knew something was wrong from that first ring." Susan: "Hello?"--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Lynette's House](The telephone rings.)Mary Alice Voiceover:"After all, it's one of the unwritten rules of suburbia..."(Lynette wakes and grabs the phone.)Lynette: "Hello?"--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Gabrielle's House](The telephone rings.)Mary Alice Voiceover:"...don't call the neighbors in the middle of the night..."(Telephone ringing. Gabrielle grabs the phone. )Mary Alice Voiceover:"...unless the news is bad."Gabrielle: "Hello?"--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Hospital]Mary Alice Voiceover:"And so they came with their uncombed hair and their unmade faces. They came because after all these years..."(Susan, Lynette and Gabrielle exit the hospital elevator, walking quickly. They come to a waiting room where Bree is sitting there alone.)Susan: "Bree."Mary Alice Voiceover:"They were no longer just neighbors."(Susan, Lynette ,and Gabrielle go Bree and sit with her.)Bree: "Hi. What are you doing here?"Susan: "We heard Rex had a heart attack. How is he?"Bree: "Um, he's stable, but, um, they have to put in a pacemaker, so they're gonna need to operate. How did you guys know?"Gabrielle: "Danielle called."Lynette: "So how are you doing?"Bree: "We were having a fight when he had the heart attack, and I'm just feeling really guilty, because I should have gotten him here sooner and - "Gabrielle: "Honey, the doctors here are great!"Lynette: "Yeah, and he's so young, he's gonna bounce right back."Susan: "I'm sure you have nothing to worry about."Bree: "You know what? I am so happy that you guys came here, I really am, but I am trying really hard to be strong, so if you keep comforting me..."Lynette: "You're gonna lose it?"Bree: "Mm-hmm."Gabrielle: "Then we won't comfort."Bree: "Thank you."Gabrielle: "We're just gonna talk about non-crisis things."Susan: "Oh, I know. Uh, I found Mrs. Huber's journal in some of Mike's stuff, and I think she knew Mary Alice's secret and was blackmailing her."(Bree, Gabrielle and Lynette look at her.)Lynette: "Yep, that'll do it."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Outside Felicia's House](Zach walks quickly out the front door, Felicia right behind him.)Felicia: "Zachary! Come back here, please."(Zach goes to his own house, slams the door and runs up the stairs. He is carrying a suitcase and heads up the stairs. Felicia enters after him.)Felicia: "Your father told you he would be gone for a while. He said you should let me look after you."Zach: "I will be fine by myself. I am not a child."(Zach continues upstairs, goes to his room, and lays down on his bed. Felicia enters.)Felicia: "I know you're not a child, but I think we should discuss this."(Felicia sits on the bed next to Zach.)Zach: "I'm fine, really."Felicia: "Why should you fend for yourself when you can just come home with me? Let meshoulder the burden. It would really be my pleasure-"(Felicia reaches to brush Zach's hair back. Zach pushes her away and jumps up from the bed. Felicia jumps back.)Zach: "Stop! What kind of freak are you? Just leave me alone, all right? You are not my mother! I told you that I am fine. Now stop acting like my mother and go home."Felicia: "I wish it were that easy, Zachary, for your sake, but it's not. Your father's not coming back."Zach: "He said that he was."Felicia: "He lied. I wanted to spare you this, but your father and I discussed it, and he decided that he shouldn't come back. Now, get your bag and let's go home. I'm gonna make you some pudding."(Felicia walks out of the room. She starts down the stairs and as she reaches the bottom, Zach runs after her, holding a hockey stick.)Zach: "What did you do to my dad?"(He swings the hockey stick at her.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Outside Paul's House](From the Young's front lawn, the sounds of someone being struck over and over can be heard.) Zach: "Tell me!"--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Mrs. Applewhite's House](The new neighbor, Mrs. Applewhite, comes out onto the porch carrying a sewing basket. Edie approaches.)Edie: "Mrs. Applewhite?"Mrs. Applewhite: "Yes?"Edie: "Hi. I'm Edie Britt. The realtor that helped you buy this house?"Mrs. Applewhite: "Oh, of course. Hi."Edie: "Hi. I've been so curious to meet you."Mrs. Applewhite: "Really? Why?"Edie: "It's just that I've never sold a house over the phone before."(A young man comes out the front door and closes the door behind him.)Edie: "You were awfully brave, buying the place sight unseen."Mrs. Applewhite: "Not really. We could tell from the advertisement it was just what we were looking for. This is my son Matthew."(Matthew approaches and reaches to shake Edie's hand.)Matthew: "It's nice to meet you, ma'am."Edie: " Please. Call me Edie. Ma'am's for middle-aged women."(Edie looks over a bush and points to Susan across the way who's putting trash in her trash can.) Edie: "...like her. You can call her ma'am anytime you want. So are you two finding everything okay? Because we didn't do our realtor's walk-through."Mrs. Applewhite: "Everything is fine."Edie: "Oh, honey. Escrow's closed. Now I can show you where to put the buckets when the rain comes."Mrs. Applewhite: "Edie. The house is fine. But how lovely of you to stop by."Edie: "Okay. Here is my card. Call anytime you want. Bye."(Matthew and his mother watch Edie walk to her car.)Matthew: "eople are very friendly in this neighborhood."Mrs. Applewhite: "Yes. Yes, they are."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Susan's House](Susan paces while on the phone. She is holding Mrs. Huber's journal.)Susan: "Mike, Hi, sweetie. I hope the job's going well. Um, so I hope you're not mad, but I found Mrs. Huber's journal in your truck, and, well, I couldn't exactly not read it, so I did, and, um, I know all about the blackmail, so call me. We'll talk. Love you. Bye."(Later, Susan is on the phone again.)Susan: "I haven't heard back, and I was getting a little concerned. The girls and I were talking, and, we think that maybe Paul Young killed Mrs. Huber, and if he did, then maybe he killed your old girlfriend, too, so we should really talk about this, so call me. I love you. Bye."(Later, Susan is on the phone again.)Susan: "I thought the whole point of having a cell phone was so someone could reach you when they needed to talk. How can we move forward as a couple if you won't communicate with me? Mike, I need you to call me back! I mean it! Love you. Bye."(Later, Susan is on the phone again.)Susan: "I am so sorry for that last phone call. Um, let's just say it was the worry talking. I just really need to talk to you, and-"(There's a small chirping sound coming from the phone.)Susan: "Can you hang on? I got another call. Hello?"Mike: "Hey, it's me."Susan: "Oh, my God. Where have you been?"Mike: "Uh, the reception's pretty lousy up here, but I got your messages."Susan: "Well, I'm really sorry for that last message. I was just, uh..."Mike: "Stressed out?"Susan: "Yes. Let's call it stressed out. Uh, so how did you get Martha Huber's journal?Mike: "Oh, um, her sister, Mrs. Tilman, gave it to me. She was helping me with my search." Susan: "I just really think we need to give it to the police."Mike: "Uh, yeah. Yeah, absolutely."Susan: "Really?"Mike: "Sure. Yeah. As soon as I get through with this job, we'll make an appointment with that detective, what's his name, uh, Copeland."Susan: "Great. That's great."Mike: "All right, so I'll, uh, see you in a few hours."Susan: "Okay. Hurry, though. I just have a feeling that Paul Young is in the middle of all of this." Mike: "Well, let's not rush to judgment."(Mike hangs up. He's in his truck and turns to look at the back seat, where Paul Young is tied up with tape over his mouth. Mike drives off into the mountains.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Courtroom Waiting Room](Carlos is sitting in a chair wearing an orange jump suit with handcuffs on. Gabrielle enterscarrying a suit.)Carlos: "What are you doing here?"Gabrielle: "I'm here to testify for you, Carlos. Can you take those off?"Policeman (unlocks Carlos' handcuffs): "Yes, ma'am."Gabrielle: "There's no way I'm dressing him."Carlos: "Gabby, thank god you're doing this. Beating up a second gay guy? It looks bad." Gabrielle: "Yes, well, Carlos, in some circles, beating people up at all is frowned upon." Carlos: "So why'd you change your mind?"Gabrielle: "Well, I'm about to be the mother of your child, which means a lot of responsibility and little time for myself. So if I'm gonna get you out of this mess, you have to reciprocate." Carlos: "Okay."Gabrielle: "When the baby cries in the middle of the night, you're gonna get up without saying one word. Doctors' appointments: you're driving. I'm not putting a car seat in my Maserati. And you will also be on bottle duty. That means washing, sterilizing, and filling. That way I'll have some semblance of a life, and then maybe I won't hate you so much."(Gabrielle tightens Carlos' tie. He winces. She fixes his collar.)Gabrielle: "All right, there we go. So we're good? See you in court."(Gabrielle begins walking out.)Carlos: "Hey, Gabby? Aren't we breast feeding?"Gabrielle: "Oh, honey, if you can swing that one, more power to you."(Gabrielle leaves the room.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Pizza Place](Inside a children's Pizza Parlor. Lynette and Parker enter, with Lynette pushing the stroller.) Parker: "Can I buy my own pizza?"Lynette: "Uh, you can, honey, If you can pay for it."(Lynette hears cheering and yelling. She looks over to the game area and sees Tom playing air hockey with a bunch of kids.)Tom: "Yeah, that is nineteen, nineteen, nineteen-zip. Bring it."Lynette: "Just stay here with Penny for a second, okay?"(Lynette walks into the game room and approaches Tom.)Lynette: "Tom?"Tom: "Yes! In your face! That is twenty-zip game, out!"Lynette: "Tom, what are you doing?"Tom: "I'm playing air hockey. What's it look like? Kevin, you're up."Lynette: "Well, it's the middle of the day, and shouldn't you be at work?"Tom: "Mm, no. I quit."Lynette: "You did not."Tom: "Yes. Yesterday. I told Peterson he could stick it. Boom! You're not bringing it, Kevin! Bring it!"Lynette: "Could you talk to me for a second? I don't understand."Tom: "What? You asked Peterson's wife to make sure he wouldn't promote me. So he gives a huge promotion to Annabel, so I quit. What don't you understand?"Lynette: "Okay. Okay. Could we go home and talk about this, please?"Tom: "No, we can't. Serve it up, meat."Lynette: "You're just gonna stay here and play games all day?"Tom: "No, I'm gonna go and get some ice cream, and then I'm gonna go up to the lake, maybe rent a boat, do whatever it is I feel like -- God!"Boy: "Gotcha!"Lynette: "Tom."Tom: "Go home, Lynette. Go home before I say something I regret. Go home."(Lynette walks away.)Tom: "All right, you. You score this next point, you get your bike back."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Hospital Room](Bree is sitting beside Rex who is attached to various monitors. Rex opens his eyes and looks over at Bree.)Rex: "What are you thinking about?"Bree: "Oh, I was just, um, thinking that I need to start, uh, spring cleaning."Rex: "You haven't done that yet?"Bree: "No, and I need to clean out our rain gutters, and, uh, beneath the refrigerator, and I can't tell you how long it's been since I've replaced the shelf liner, so..."Rex: "Then you'll finish off with our wedding silver."Bree: "How did you know that?"Rex: "See, all those years, you didn't think I was paying attention. But I was."Bree: "And do you know why I save it for last?"Rex: "No."Bree: "Because it makes me think of my Aunt Fern. On the day we got married, I told her how happy I was, and she told me that even during bad times to always remember that the best was yet to come. And so as I polish it, I think about you and the kids and our life and how right she was."Rex: "They're gonna operate on me."Bree: "I know."Rex: "I wanna say some stuff just in case."Bree: "Rex, you don't have to say anything."Rex: "I'm sorry for everything I did. The moving out, the infidelity, the sex stuff..."Bree: "It doesn't matter. From here on in, can we just say that we're even?"(Rex reaches for Bree's hand. Bree clasps his hand.)Rex: "Okay."Bree: "Thanks."(Bree sits on the bed next to Rex and tenderly touches his face.)Bree: "And for the record, you are gonna come through this operation just fine."Rex: "How can you be so sure?"Bree: "Because I told you: the best is yet to come."(Bree kisses Rex. She places her head on his chest and Rex puts his arm around her.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Outside Susan's House](Susan, Julie, and Karl come out. Karl is holding Julie's suitcase.)Julie: "So I'll see you Sunday. Don't forget to feed Bongo."Susan: "Oh, thanks. I'll go do that now."Karl: "Go on in the car, sweetie. I have to talk to your mom real quick."(Julie gets into her father's car.)Karl: "So you're gonna go live in sin with the plumber slash ex-con?"Susan: "It's funny you should mention sin. I think adultery still falls in that category."Karl: "I, I don't like the idea of this guy being around Julie twenty-four seven."Susan: "He's a good person."Julie: "Mike's cool, dad. He cares about us a lot, and I like having him around. So don't mess this up."Susan: "You heard the girl."Karl: "He's still a plumber."(Karl get into his car and drives away. Julie waves goodbye. Susan goes across the street to Mike's house.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Mike's House](She enters the darkened house with a key. Bongo begins barking and growling.)Susan: "Now, you be a good boy, Bongo, or you're gonna go to bed hungry."(Susan goes into the kitchen. Zach comes out from behind a wall. Susan turns and sees Zach. He has a gun in his hand.)Zach: "Hi, Ms. Mayer. Can you sit down, please?"(Susan is sitting at the dining room table. Zach is sitting across from her with the gun on the arm of the chair. Susan looks into the kitchen and sees a block with knives on the counter. She looks around the room. She sees a tall vase and part of a moose horn. She begins standing up.) Susan: "I'm just gonna go get some water."Zach: "I'd rather you didn't."(Susan slowly sits back down as Zach keeps his gun trained on her. Edie walks up Mike's porch. She knocks.)Zach: "Don't answer it.(Zach gets behind the door where it's dark and peeks out. Edie looks through the window and sees Susan quietly sitting there.)Edie: "I know you're in there, Susan. I can see you. If you don't want to talk to me, fine. At least have the courtesy to hide."(Edie begins to knock louder. Susan looks at Zach as though saying, "what should I do?") Zach: "All right, but don't let her in."(Susan gets up and opens the door a crack. Zach is standing behind the door holding the gun on her.)Susan: "Edie, what a pleasant surprise."Edie: "Right. Is Mike home?"Susan: "Uh, no, he's on a big plumbing job. What's up?"Edie: "Can I come in?"Susan: "Why?"Edie: "I'm warning all the neighbors. Felicia Tilman was attacked."Susan: "She was?"Edie: "At the Young house. They just took her away an ambulance. I'm totally freaked out. My guys haven't shown up at the job site yet. I'm over there all alone, so do you think maybe I could just come in and hang out for a while?"(Susan mouths "Zach is sticking a gun at me" to Edie, but Edie misunderstands.)Edie: "Stick it up my what?"Susan: "Just get the hell out of here."Edie: "God, you are such a bitch."(Susan slams the door on Edie. She faces Zach who continues holding the gun on her.) Susan: "Why?"Zach: "I asked Mrs. Tilman to tell me the truth about my father. She did."Susan: "What'd she say?"Zach: "Mr. Delfino took my dad away to kill him. Now I'm gonna kill Mr. Delfino."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Courtroom](Gabrielle is on the stand.)Gabrielle: "Your Honor, this whole mess is just a result of my loneliness. My marriage is a bit strained, and after Carlos was convicted-"Judge: "No one's been convicted yet, Mrs. Solis. This is just a Grand Jury hearing." Gabrielle: "Oh, no, no, I'm talking about his other crime."Judge: "Oh, right. Go ahead."Gabrielle: "Anyway, he was placed under house arrest, and he being the jealous man that he is, got a little crazy every time I left the house."(The courtroom is filled. Justin, with a bruised face, is sitting in the back. Also in the courtroom is the cable guy Carlos previously attacked.)Gabrielle: "He knows how men look at me, and, well, I, I didn't exactly ease his mind. I falsely led him to believe I was having an affair. And, and before Carlos's house arrest, he was always working, and he was never with me. And I thought that maybe if he believed I was having an affair, he would realize he loved me. And I know it sounds stupid, I do. I just-"Prosecution Attorney: "Is there a point to this?"Gabrielle: "My point is that Carlos is an angry, jealous Neanderthal. But he's not a gay-basher." Judge: "All right. I've heard enough. Counsel, approach."(Holding his hand over the microphone, the judge speaks with the attorneys.)Judge: "I've got to be honest, I don't think we have a hate crime here."(Gabrielle, listening intently, turns to Carlos and nods encouragingly at him. Just then, John enters the courtroom. As the judge and attorneys continue talking, John approaches Carlos from behind. Gabrielle watches in horror as John leans to whisper into Carlos' ear.)John: "Just so you know, you beat up the wrong guy. Didn't you think it was strange that you had the only lawn on Wisteria Lane that needed to be mowed three times a week?"(He claps Carlos on the back and gives Gabrielle a brief fierce stare before walking off.) (Carlos slowly turns his head to look at Gabrielle. Her eyes widen and Carlos turns his body to look at where John is standing directly behind Justin.)Carlos: "You are so dead! You are so dead. You are dead!"(Carlos jumps over the barrier and runs toward John. Judge pounds the gavel.)。

Episode 01.06 - Running to Stand StillMary Alice begins speaking as the camera pans over to Gabrielle。

Zach:I know why my mom killed herself.Gabrielle:This is getting really weird.I think we should go to the police.Gabrielle:Mama Solis. What are you doing here?Mama Solis：So you think she's cheating on you?Carlos：I think so.Mama Solis：I'll take care of it.Rex: We got a call --something about a break-in.Policeman:I thought I'd seen a lot on the job,but this is something else.Bree: Zach, why did you do this?Zach:I don't know.Rex:Zach.[Carlos's house](Inside the house, where the two of them and Mama Solis eat breakfast.)Mary Alice Voiceover:The war for control of Carlos began the night he proposed, and Gabrielle had been losing ground to Juanita ever since. From the prenuptial agreement which she reluctantly signed, to the selection of wedding music she despised, the color of the house paint she hadn't wanted ... Gabrielle had suffered one defeat after another. And now that Juanita suspected her daughter-in-law of having an affair, it had became increasintly apparent that in this war...Yoa Lin: "Mrs. Solis, I'll be at the market."Mary Alice Voiceover:"...no prisoners would be taken."Gabrielle: "Thank you, Yoa Lin."Mama Solis: "I don't see why you have her."Gabrielle: "It's a big house. I need help."Mama Solis: "It's only called help when you do some of the work yourself." Gabrielle: "I supervise."Mama Solis: "You pay her $300 a week. That's $15,000 a year. Carlos, you always say how you're not putting away enough for retirement!"Carlos: "You know, baby, it would be a good idea if we cut back on expenses." Gabrielle: "You expect me to take care of this place all by myself?"Carlos: "Other women manage..."(He gets up from the table and Gabrielle looks at Mama Solis, who smiles triumphantly. )[Gabrielle's Bedroom](Carlos lies on the bed, reading, when Gabrielle glides into the room in a revealing outfit of bra and underwear. She clears her throat, crawls on the bed, and straddles Carlos. She kisses him, and then sighs.)Carlos: "Mmmm... that's nice.."Gabrielle: "You like that?"Carlos: "Oh yeah."Gabrielle: "God, I'm gonna miss this, Carlos."Carlos: "What do you mean?"Gabrielle: "Well, since, I'm gonna have to be doing the cooking, and the cleaning, and all the shopping, like the other wives..."Carlos: "Mmm hmm..."Gabrielle: "...I'm going to be exhausted at night--just like all the other wives ... till I build up my stamina, of course, but that might take a couple years..."(She kisses Carlos down his body as he frowns.)(The Next Morning)Mary Alice Voiceover:"Sadly for Juanita, she had ignored the first rule of war..." (Carlos comes down the stairs.)Mama Solis: "Good morning, Carlos."Carlos (emphatically): "The maid stays."(He leaves.)Mary Alice Voiceover:"Never underestimate your enemy!"(Mama Solis looks up to the staircase where Gabrielle stands, triumphant.) [Outside of Paul Young's House; Yard Sale]Mary Alice Voiceover:"Of the many suburban rituals, none is quite so cherished as the neighborhood yard sale. The shoppers come to sift through the discarded belongings of someone they don't really know, in hopes of finding bargains they don't really need, each so determined to save a few pennies, they often miss hidden treasures..."(Paul puts things in a box and closes the top, revealing that the box is labeled "Baby Stuff.")(Susan walks up to him.)Susan: "Hey, Paul."Paul: "Hi, Susan."Susan: "I got to say, I was a little surprised to see Mary Alice's award for sale. She got it for doing charity work, from the Chamber of Commerce."Paul: "Zach and I are moving. We don't need to carry any more with us than is absolutely necessary."Susan: "That makes sense. Still, I just want to make sure you didn't want to keep it, for Zach, something to remember his mother by."Paul: "Zach doesn't need a piece of glass to remember his mother. I'm out of newspaper." (He picks up a yellow/green blanket to wrap the glass.) "Here, let's call it ten bucks for everything."Susan: "Great. Speaking of Zach, I haven't seen him around lately."Paul: "He's been a bit depressed. I thought he could use a change of scenery, so I sent him to stay with relatives."Susan: "Oh, which ones?"Paul: "You don't know them."Susan: "So, how'd you get the fat lip?"Paul: "The usual way. Asking too many questions."(Paul walks away and Susan picks up the box and walks over to where Gabrielle is.) Gabrielle: "Did you find out where Zach is?"Susan: "No, but I can tell you this much. He's not staying with relatives." (Carlos and Mama Solis stand off in a corner. Mama Solis looks at a record album while Carlos surveys the crowd.)Carlos: "It's driving me crazy, mama. It could be any one of these guys she's having the affair with."Mama Solis: "Don't worry about it. I'm not letting her out of my sight."Carlos: "Now, who the hell is that? And look at the way she's touching him. You think that's the guy she's having the affair with? "Mama Solis: "Carlos, don't be stupid. A guy she talks to in public isn't someone you're gonna worry about."Carlos: "So it's someone that she doesn't talk to. What do I have to do? Beat up every guy in town?"Mama Solis: "Marriage takes work!"(They walk away, passing by John, who looks after them.)(Lynette, Bree, and Susan stand talking to each other. Gabrielle joins them soon after.)Lynette: "I'm not surprised that he's playing it close to the vest. Paul knows we're on to him."Bree: "Zach said Mary Alice killed herself because of something that he had done, something bad. Is there anyone else who'd know what he was talking about?" Susan: "No. That's why we have to find him. It's the only way we'll know the truth." Bree: "It just doesn't make any sense. Zach is such a sweet kid. I can't imagine him doing anything that terrible."Gabrielle: "Well, he did break into your house. I mean, the kid is obviously troubled in some way."(Bree sighs.)[Silvercrest Juvenile Rehabilitation Center](Inside, Paul and a doctor stare through the window on the door of Zach's room. He sits on his bed, his head bowed as he eats from a tray of food.)Dr. Sicher: "Severe depression. Borderline personality disorder. Zach is a deeply troubled young man."Paul: "I'm aware of that. What are you giving him?"Dr. Sicher: "Some antidepressants and a mood stabilizer."Paul: "Good."Dr. Sicher: "I'm also recommending extensive psychotherapy, to help him with everything he repressed..."Paul: "I don't think so."Dr. Sicher: "Mr. Young, I can't just medicate him indefinitely."Paul: "Forget the Freud and stick with the drugs. No new treatments without my permission."(He walks away.)[School Gym](Lynette is seated with a group of women gathered near a stage.)Ms. Truesdale: "I think this is going to be a great version of Little Red Riding Hood, and it is your involvement that make the plays here at Barcliffe Academy so special. Thank you." (clapping) "And now, I would like to turn over the next part of our meeting to our parent coordinator, the amazing Maisy Gibbons."Maisy: "Thank you, Ms. Truesdale. Now, before everyone leaves, we have new copies of the script up here. Tilda and Francis and I went to the rehearsal yesterday, and we were a little troubled by the ending. Killing the wolf. It says the wrong message to our kids. And we believe that animals should only be euthanized as a last resort."(Lynette laughs.)Maisy: "Do you find something amusing?"Lynette: "I'm sorry, I thought you were kidding."Maisy: "No."Lynette: "Oh, okay."Maisy: "So in our version, the wolf is aggressive because he has a thorn in his paw. And the woodsman will take out the thorn, and send Mr. Wolf on his way." Lynette: "I'm sorry, aren't we doing Little Red Riding Hood?"Maisy: "Yes."Lynette: "So then you are aware that the wolf is a bad guy. He eats Little Red's grandma. If you let him go, he's just going to chow down on another defenseless old lady."Maisy: "I'm sorry, and you are?"Lynette: "I'm Lynette Scavo. My twins just joined. They're playing oak trees." Maisy: "Oh, of course. Lynette. Let's see, you are ... signed up to take tickets the night of the show, is that right?"Lynette: "Yeah."Maisy: "Well, with all due respect, let's leave the creative suggestions to the mothers who have assumed the heavy lifting, shall we?"Lynette: "Sure. Whatever."[Bree's House](Gabrielle and Mama Solis sit at Bree's kitchen table, drinking coffee Bree pours for them.)Bree: "I must say, I'm jealous of how much time you two spend together. My mother-in-law would never want to hang out with me all day."Gabrielle: "She sounds nice."(Danielle walks into the house with John.)Danielle: "Hey!"Bree: "Oh, hey there, you two!"Gabrielle: "Hi, John."John: "Mrs. Solis."Gabrielle: "I wasn't aware you two were friends."John: "Yeah, we go to the same school."Gabrielle: "Of course you do."Danielle: "Mom, if you need anything, we'll be upstairs in my room studying." Bree: "Have fun."(Danielle and John leave.)Gabrielle: "Doesn't it make you nervous, a boy alone upstairs with Danielle?" Bree: "Oh no, I don't worry about John. Both he and Danielle are in the abstinence club."(Gabrielle chokes and spews out coffee.)Gabrielle: "The coffee is a little hot."[Outside Susan's House](Susan opens up her mailbox and takes out her mail. When she turns around, she sees Paul getting into his car across the street.)Mary Alice Voiceover:"Susan was infuriated by Paul's evasive answers."(Susan stares at Paul across the street.)Paul: "Hey!"(He waves at her.)Mary Alice Voiceover:"She was convinced he was deliberately hiding Zach, and hiding the truth. She hoped that finding one would lead to the other. To succeed, Susan would have to be evasive herself."[Mrs. Greenberg's House](Susan rings the doorbell of Mrs. Greenberg's house, holding a package of eggs.) Mrs. Greenberg: "Susan. Long time, no see."Susan: "Mrs. Greenberg. Do you remember those two eggs I let you borrow last Christmas?"(She opens up her carton eggs and motions to the two empty spaces in the container.)Susan: "I need those back."Mrs. Greenberg: "Well gosh, honey, I'm fresh out, but if you want, I could run to the store."Susan: "Oh, forget about it, it's not that important, but since I'm here, do you still have that old hatchback sitting in your garage? Can I borrow it tomorrow?"Mrs. Greenberg: "You want to borrow my car?"Susan: "Just for a couple of hours."Mrs. Greenberg: "Well, I'm not sure. Do you know how to drive a stick?" Susan: "Yes, I think so. I learned in college. It's like riding a bike, right?"Mrs. Greenberg: "I'm not sure, dear."Susan: "It's not big deal. It's just for a couple of hours. I let you borrow my eggs for a whole year."[Dr. Goldfine's Office]Dr. Goldfine: "First off, I'm very pleased with the work we've done in our sessions thus far. We're making excellent progress."Bree: "Thank you, I feel really good about it."Dr. Goldfine: "But there are a few areas of your marriage we haven't covered yet." Bree: "Oh, really. Like what?"Rex: "Um, I've told Dr. Goldfine in our private sessions that I'm not happy with our sex life."Dr. Goldfine: "And Rex feels when you two have intercourse, you're not as connected as you could be."Bree: "Connected?"Rex: "Well yeah, it's like you're thinking about other things. Is your hair getting messed up? Did you remember to buy the toothpaste? You're just not there." Dr. Goldfine: "This kind of disconnect is often a symptom of a deeper problem." Rex: "So, we were talking, and the idea of a sexual surrogate came up."Dr. Goldfine: "This is a licensed professional who'd work with you as a couple on solving whatever sexual problems you may be having. I have an excellent referral." Bree: "And what would this sexual surrogate person do?"Rex: "Well, she would coach us."Bree: "She!"Dr. Goldfine: "She's very discrete. You'll hardly notice she's there."Bree: "Oh. So she would be in the room with us, while we make love?"Rex: "Yes, helping us to achieve maximum sexual potential."Dr. Goldfine: "Do you have any questions?"Bree: "Just one. How much longer is your midlife crisis going to last, because it is really starting to tick me off!"(She gets up and walks out.)[Lynette's House](The four women are seated around the dining room table, cards in front of them. Mama Solis is sitting off to the side, knitting.)Lynette: "All right. I think everyone is down for a nap. We've got no more than an hour. Let's get cracking. Five car draw, nothing wild."Bree: "So how is it going with Mike, Susan?"Susan: "It's going, finally. We have our first official date next week. I think he's taking me to see a play or something."Lynette: "Might I suggest the Barcliffe Academy production of Little Red Riding Hood?"Susan: "Oh, that's right, the twins-stage debut!"Gabrielle: "Are they having fun?"Lynette: "Sure, they get to play oak trees. I'm the one who has to deal with all the drama behind the scenes."Bree: "Oh, I take it you've met Maisy Gibbons."Lynette: "She's a total nightmare. I guess I shouldn't have challenged her." Bree: "Oh, dear."Lynette: "Because now no one on the play committee even wants to talk to me."Bree: "Oh, Maisy does love to rule her little kingdom."Susan: "It hasn't really changed since Girl Scouts. Girls smile at you to your face, and then behind your back, they make fun of you because you're the only one not shaving your legs yet."(Gabrielle gets up and goes to the living room where chips and dip are on a platter. She takes some as the women talk.)Lynette: "That would have never happened in Boy Scouts. When I worked, mostly with men, I preferred the way they fought. A guy takes his opponent on, face to face, and once he's won, he's top dog. It's primitive, but it's fair."Susan: "And a lot less sneaky."Gabrielle: "Isn't it sexist of us to generalize like this?"(Gabrielle goes to the window and peeks outside, seeing John working outside across the street.)Lynette: "It's science, Gabrielle.Sociologists have documented this stuff." Gabrielle: "Well, who am I to argue with sociologists? (pauses) Wow this, uh, this guacamole has got a kick. I'm going to run to the little girls' room. You guys go ahead, I might be a while."Lynette: "I hate playing three handed poker. Let's take a break."Mama Solis: "I'll play!"Bree: "You play poker?"Mama Solis: "I used to play a little with my grandfather."Susan: "Pull up a chair."Mama Solis: "Oh, I notice you were just playing for chips, huh. My grandfather used to say, it's always more fun to play for money."Lynette: "Why not? Fifty cents a bet?"Mama Solis: "Make it a buck." She pulls a wad of cash out of her brassiere. "Three raise limit. Twenty dollar buy in."[Bathroom](Gabrielle closes the door to the bathroom and checks her appearance in the mirror. Then she opens the window and peers down. Climbing over the windowsill, she falls outside, landing with a shriek. She looks over the fence to where John is mowing the lawn. She climbs over the fence by stepping on stacked wood, knocking them over. Once over the top of the fence, she falls. John rushes over.)John: "Mrs. Solis! What are you doing?"Gabrielle: "Why haven't you returned any of my phone calls?"John: "I've been busy."Gabrielle: "Yeah, I've seen who you've been busy with."John: "Danielle? Come on, I mean, she's just a friend."Gabrielle: "Well, before you get any friendlier, let me remind you, I can do things to you she can't even pronounce."John: "Well, a lot of good it does me with your mother-in-law following you around all the time. Look, maybe we should just cool it for awhile."Gabrielle: "Oh, no, John, please don't say that. I have everything under control." (They kiss.)Gabrielle: "Now give me a boost."(He helps her climb back over the fence.)[Lynette's House](Gabrielle walks back into the dining room.)Gabrielle: "Hey! So what did I miss?"Mama Solis: "Not much, just a few friendly hands of poker with the girls." (There is a huge stack of money in front of Mama Solis as she pulls it all towards her. The other women look stunned.)[Play Rehearsal]Maisy: I'm sorry I'm late.As I'm sure you have all heard, Celia Bond broke her wrist playing tennis, which means we are now in desperate need of someone to do the costumes. I'm keeping my fingers crossed here. Are there any volunteers?" Lynette (standing up): "I'll do it."Maisy: "Really, that's a ... do you know how to sew?"Lynette (sits down): "Absolutely."Maisy: "Well, great, uh, thank you, Lynette!" (clapping)Lynette (stands up again): "Okay. So, now that I'm going to do some, heavy lifting, I believe I have a right to talk about the changes made to the script?"(She pauses. Nobody says anything, so she rushes forward to stand next to Maisy and address the group.)Lynette: "Um, ladies. We all grew up with Little Red Riding Hood, and we survived it, scary stuff and all, so I say, to hell with political correctness, let our kids experience this classic like it was meant to be enjoyed. Let's kill the damn wolf, and just put on the best show we can." (clapping)Maisy: "Thank you, Lynette, for that impassioned speech, but I believe that ship has sailed."Jordana: "No, it hasn't. We still have time to change the ending back."Ms. Truesdale: "And you know, Maisy, it is just a fairy tale - I don't think it will upset the children."Maisy: "Well, I think you are wrong."Lynette: "Well, that's what's so great about being in a democracy. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. Also, everyone has a right to vote. So all in favor of the woodsman going medieval on the big bad wolf's ass..."(She raises her hand. And slowly, the others follow, except for Maisy, who glares at Lynette.)[Outside of Paul's House](Sitting in her borrowed car, hidden mostly from view, Susan puts on a pair of sunglasses and watches Paul get into his SUV and drive away. Then she follows him - after a lurching start.)Susan: "Oh!"(He pulls into a parking lot and gets out. Susan slows down and looks at the sign stating "Silvercrest Juvenile Rehabilitation Center.")[Restaurant](Bree is sitting alone at her table when she notices Dr. Goldfine sit down at anothertable, also alone, with a book.)(Bree takes a sip of wine, then gets up and goes to his table.)Bree: "Dr. Goldfine."Dr. Goldfine: "Bree."Bree: "You're dining alone?"Dr. Goldfine: "Actually, I am."Bree: "Well, what a coincidence. So am I. It seems a shame for us to eat by ourselves. Shall I, pull up a chair?"Dr. Goldfine: "Bree, it's nothing personal, but I never socialize with clients." Bree: "Oh," (she pauses. )"Oh, I get it. I'm so sorry, of course, it's, it's inappropriate. It's just that after what happened yesterday, there's so much I need to say because..." (she pauses.) "I suppose it can wait."(She walks back over to her table and sits down, taking a sip from her glass of wine. Then they take turns looking at each other. And finally he waves her to come back over and sit across from him. Bree breathes a sigh of relief and gets up to join him.) [Gabrielle's House](Gabrielle is on the phone.)Gabrielle: "No, Lynette, I'm sorry, Juanita's taking a bath. Well, how much did she win from you? Jeez," (She laughs.) "Yeah, I guess she'll take a check. Okay. All right. Bye."Carlos: "What was that about?"Gabrielle: "It turns out your mother is quite the card shark."Carlos: "You let her play cards? How long did she play?"Gabrielle: "Not that long, why?"(Carlos walks away from her.) "Carlos, what is it?" Carlos: "I never told you this, but my mother had a serious gambling problem." Gabrielle: "Was this before we were married?"Carlos: "Yeah. It was bad. She went into debt. She dipped into her savings, started hocking jewelry..."Gabrielle: "Honey, it was only a small neighborhood game."Carlos: "But it doesn't take much for her to fall off the wagon. I know she seems like a very strong woman, but..."Gabrielle: "She has a major weakness. Honey, oh,"( she embraces him.) "It's okay. You were right to tell me this."(She smiles.)[Restaurant]Dr. Goldfine. "And you understand I have to treat this as a session."Bree: "Of course, that's fine. Shall I include the meal?"Dr. Goldfine: "Oh no. We'll split that."(Bree writes a check for $180.00 payable to Dr. Albert Goldfine and hands it over.) Dr. Goldfine: "So, let's talk about yesterday. You think there might have been some truth in what Rex said?"Bree: "No, I don't."Dr. Goldfine: "Bree, you know, it's not uncommon for people experiencing sexual repression to distance themselves from the act."Bree: "Is that how you see me? As some sort of prude who just lays there like a cold fish? I love sex."Dr. Goldfine: "All right."Bree: "I love everything about it. The sensations, the smells. I especially love the feel of a man. All that muscle and sinew pressed against my body. And then, when you add friction. Mmm ... The tactile sensation of running my tongue over a man's nipple ever so gently. And then there's the act itself - two bodies becoming one in that final eruption of pleasure. To be honest, the only thing I don't like about sex is the scrotum. I mean, obviously it has its practical applications, but I'm just not a fan."Waiter: "Can I get you something?"Dr. Goldfine: "Uh, just the check, please."Waiter: "Sir, you haven't ordered yet."Dr. Goldfine: "Oh."[Gabrielle's Car](Gabrielle and Mama Solis drive up to "The Torch Lake Casino.")Mama Solis: "We're not shopping?"Gabrielle: "Oh, I thought we would stop here for lunch first. This place has the best buffet in town. All you can eat crab legs. Oh no!"Mama Solis: "What's wrong? Let's go!" (Mama is already out of the car.) Gabrielle: "I didn't realize how late it was. They're only holding the suede mini for me until two. If we stay, I'll never make it. We'll just have lunch at the mall." Mama Solis: "Wait, uh, I'l really in the mood for crab legs. Why don't you just drop me off, and you can come back."Gabrielle: "Well, if the mall is crowded, it might take over an hour."Mama Solis: "It's a buffet. There's no rush!"(Mama Solis rushes inside. Gabrielle picks up her cell phone and calls somebody as she drives away.)Gabrielle: "Hi John. Motel. Ten minutes. Be there."[Play Rehearsal]Lynette (to a child in a costume): "All right. Off you go. Thanks."Maisy: "Ooh, Lynette. I couldn't help but notice, you forgot the coonskin on that hunter's coonskin cap."Lynette: "Oh, yeah, huh, it was a creative call. Look, I'm in the middle of a costume crisis, and if I don't take a few shortcuts, I'll never finish."Maisy: "Well, Jordana Guist manages to get her work done. She runs the concessions, paints the sets, and still has time to take care of her three kids and a husband. Now, we can't have the students suffer just because you don't understand the concept of time management."Lynettte: "I hardly think the kids are going to suffer without a clump of fur on their heads."Maisy: "Okay, I'll make a creative call. We'll cut the oak trees. That forest is looking a little dense, anyway."Lynette: "My boys are the oak trees."Maisy: "Are they? Well, I wouldn't worry. We'll find something for them to do back stage. That's where the real action is."Lynette: "I'll finish the costumes."Maisy: "Well, crisis averted."[Susan's House]Julie: "You have lost your mind."Susan: "I checked upon this Silvercrest place. It's a treatment center for troubled kids. Who's gonna notice one more? I create the distraction. You blend in and find Zach."Julie: "How am I supposed to blend in with a bunch of messed up teenagers?" Susan: "I don't know, Julie. You pretend to be bulimic. Gag a little. Come on, work with me here!"Julie: "Mom, when this is over, we need to talk about your parenting skills." Susan: "Okay, fine, if you don't want to help me, I'm not going to force you." Julie: "It's not that I don't want to, it's just, why does this mean so much to you?" Susan: "Because Mary Alice was a wonderful person, and now all anybody thinks about her is that she went off the deep end and did this terrible selfish thing, and I think there is more to it than that. She was my friend, Julie, and I owe it to her to find out the truth."[Outside of the Casino](Mama Solis is sitting on a park bench, as stoic as the large wooden Indian statue next to her as Gabrielle pulls up in her car.)Gabrielle: "Juanita, what's wrong?"(Mama Solis doesn't say anything. Gabrielle puts the car in park and goes over to sit by her mother-in-law.)Gabrielle: "Juanita!"Mama Solis: "I didn't go to the buffet. I went gambling instead, and I lost." Gabrielle: "Well, how much did you have on you? It couldn't have been much." Mama Solis: "I used Carlos' credit card."Gabrielle: "Okay, well, how much did you charge?"Mama Solis: "I don't know, it stopped working."Gabrielle: "What do you mean, it stopped working. That thing has, like, a $15,000 credit limit."(They both look at each other with shocked expressions.)Gabrielle: "Oh."[Hotel Room](Rex takes a bite of food, standing up, when there's a knock on the door. Rex, with food in hand, walks over to open it. Outside the door is Bree, covered in a full-length fur coat.)Bree: "The man at the desk said there were no vacant rooms. Mind if I bunk with you?"Rex: "Bree, what are you doing here?"Bree: "It's a little chilly out here, do you mind if we discuss this inside?"Rex: "C'mon in."。

1X01: PILOTOriginal Airdate on ABC: October 3, 2004OPEN ON: [EXT. WISTERIA LANE --- MORNING](A school bus drives up the road. Friendly "Good Morning" are exchanged between neighbours. A woman pushes a baby carriage along, while a car pulls out of a driveway and drives down the road. GABRIELLE jogs past a fence on the sidewalk. Pan to:(EXT.YOUNG HOUSE - FRONT YARD)(MAR, and smells a flower, smiling faintly.)NARRATOR: My name is Mary Alice Young. When you read this morning's paper, you may come across an article about the unusual day I had last week. Normally, there's never anything newsworthy about my life. That all changed last Thursday. Of course everything seemed as normal at first. I made my breakfast for my family.(Cut to:MARY ALICE, carrying a plate of waffles to the breakfast table, where PAUL and ZACH are sitting. She passes the plate to PAUL.)MARY ALICE::Here we are. Waffles.NARRATOR: I performed my chores.(Cut to:MARY ALICE, flipping a switch on the washing machine, and then lifting a basket of clothing off the machine. )NARRATOR: I completed my projects.(Cut to:MARY ALICE, stirring a paintbrush in a can of paint and painting a garden chair)NARRATOR: I ran my errands (Cut to:MARY ALICE picking up the dry-cleaning, then retrieving the mail from the mailbox.)NARRATOR: In truth, I spent the day as I spend every other day - quietly polishing the routine of my life until it gleamed with perfection.(Cut to:MARY ALICE, straightening a photo frame on top of the piano. She sighs with satisfaction, a contented smile on her face.)NARRATOR: That's why it was so astonishing when I decided to go to my hallway closet to retrieve a revolver that had never been used.(Cut to:MARY ALICE takes a box off a shelf in the closet. Looking worried and distraught, she shakily puts a revolver to her temple. We see a finger pulling the trigger, and a loud shot is heard. The camera stays on the YOUNG family picture, as the blurred reflection of MARY ALICE is shown in the frame of the picture falling to the ground.)(Cut to: MRS. HUBER'S HOUSE - KITCHEN)(MRS. HUBER's finger dips into a pool of red sauce (resembling blood). She licks the sauce on her finger, as she turns her head towards the She licks the sauce on her finger, as she turns her head towards the YOUNG house, puzzled by the sound she's heard.)NARRATOR: My body was discovered by my neighbour, Mrs. Martha Huber, who had been startled by a strange popping sound. Her curiosity aroused, Mrs. Huber tried to think of a reason for dropping in on me unannounced. After some initial hesitation, she decided to return the blender she had borrowed from me 6 months before. (MRS. HUBER takes a blender labeled Property of MARY ALICE YOUNG off a shelf, and hurries next door to ring the doorbell. Hearing no answer, she hurries to the side of the house, where she peers inside the window and sees MARY ALICE's dead body lying on the ground, a pool of blood next to her. She screams. We see MRS. HUBER hurry back to her own house.)MRS HUBER: (on the phone) It's my neighbour. I think she's been shot, there's blood everywhere. Yes, you've got to send an ambulance. You've got to send one right now!(MRS. HUBER hangs up the phone. She stands in the kitchen, lips trembling, fighting tears.)NARRATOR: And for a moment, Mrs. Huber stood motionless in her kitchen, grief-stricken by this senseless tragedy. But, only for a moment.(MRS. HUBER turns her head sideways, noticing the blender sitting on the kitchen counter.She rips the label off the blender, and puts it back on her shelf.)NARRATOR: If there was one thing Mrs. Huber was known for, it was her ability to look on the bright side.(MRS. HUBER shuts the cupboard door.)OPENING CREDITSCUT TO: [EXT. WISTERIA LANE -- DAY](Residents wearing black clothing and bearing plates and baskets of food are walking towards the YOUNG household)NARRATOR: I was laid to rest on a Monday. After the funeral, all the residents of Wisteria Lane came to pay their respects. And as people do in this situation, they brought food.(Pan to:LYNETTE, holding a plate of fried chicken with one hand as she walks.) NARRATOR: Lynette Scavo brought fried chicken. Lynette had a great family recipe for fried chicken.(Flashback to: LYNETTE talking animatedly in a conference room as she points at a projected screen with charts and figures, a room full of corporate businesspeople taking notes or watching as she shows her presentation, smiling with confidence.) NARRATOR: Of course, she didn't cook much as she was moving up the corporate ladder. She didn't have the time.(Fade to: The doctor's office, where he performs a sonogram on LYNETTE's exposed belly, as LYNETTE lies in a chair watching the screen, laughing with excitement. Her husband, TOM, sits next to her as he watches with amazement at the sonogram, holding LYNETTE's hand.)NARRATOR: But when her doctor announced Lynette was pregnant, her husband Tom had an idea. Why not quit your job? Kids do much better with stay at home mums; it was so much less stressful.(We see TOM gesturing, talking animatedly as he proposes this idea to LYNETTE, who nods hesitantly in agreement as she looks at him.)NARRATOR: But this was not the case.(End of flashback. Resume to present.)(LYNETTE pushes a baby carriage with her free hand, looking weary. The SCAVO children, Twins PRESTON & PORTER, and the younger brother PARKER, jostles each other as they walk on the sidewalk in front of the carriage, bickering rowdily with each other.)NARRATOR: In fact, Lynette's life had become so hectic she was now forced to get her chicken from a fast food restaurant. Lynette would have appreciated the irony of it if she stopped to think about it, but she couldn't. She didn't have the time. (LYNETTE pushes in front of the 3 boys, trying to separate them.)LYNETTE: Hey, hey, hey, hey!(She kneels in front of them with a stern look on her face.)LYNETTE: Stop it, stop it, stop it. Stop it.PRESTON: But Mom!LYNETTE: No, you are going to behave today. I am not going to be humiliated in front of the entire neighbourhood. And, just so you know how serious I am... (reaches inside her top and pulls a folded piece of paper from her pocket) PRESTON: What's that?LYNETTE: Santa's cell-phone number.PORTER: How'd you get that?LYNETTE: I know someone, who knows someone, who knows an elf. And if anyone of you acts up, so help me, I will call Santa and tell him you want socks for Christmas. You willing to risk that?SCAVO kids: Uh-uh! (all shake their heads vehemently)LYNETTE: Okay.(She tucks the paper back in her pocket, and straightens.)LYNETTE: Let's get this over with.(The camera pans across the road.)(Pan to:EXT. SOLIS HOUSE - FRONT YARD)(CARLOS stands outside, hands in his pocket, turning his head to see GABRIELLE come out of the front door, holding a plate in one hand and a bag in the other. She wears a black halter neck dress, black high heels and an expensive diamond necklace. )NARRATOR: Gabrielle Solis, who lives down the block, brought a spicy paella. (Flashback to: GABRIELLE, strutting down a runway, wearing a pink dress as she models, the crowd is clapping and many cameras are flashing. The camera pans to CARLOS sitting in the audience.)NARRATOR: Since her modelling days in New York, Gabrielle had developed a taste for rich food and rich men. Carlos, who worked in mergers and acquisitions, proposed on their third date. Gabrielle was touched when tears welled up in his eyes. (Flash to: GABRIELLE and CARLOS, sitting in a restaurant. CARLOS holds out a ring as GABRIELLE gasps, excitedly hopping up and down in her chair as she agrees, smiling and laughing. We see the gleam of CARLOS'tears of happiness as he smiles at her.)NARRATOR: But she soon discovered this happened every time Carlos closed a big deal.(End of flashback. Resume to present.)(GABRIELLE walks down the pathway to where CARLOS is waiting, and hands him the plate. They start walking together towards the YOUNG house.) NARRATOR: Gabrielle liked her paella piping hot. However, her relationship with her husband was considerably cooler.CARLOS: If you talk to Al Mason at this thing, I want you to casually mention how much I paid for your necklace.GABRIELLE: Why don't I just pin the receipt to my chest?CARLOS: He let me know how much he paid for his wife's new convertible. Look, just work it into the conversation.GABRIELLE: There's no way I can just work that in, Carlos.CARLOS: Why not? At the Donohue party, everyone was talking about mutual funds. And you found a way to mention you slept with half the Yankee outfield. GABRIELLE: I'm telling you, it came up in the context of the conversation. CARLOS: Hey, people are starting to stare. Can you keep your voice down please? GABRIELLE: (sigh) Absolutely. Wouldn't want them to think we're not happy.CUT TO: [EXT. YOUNG HOUSE - PORCH].(The door opens to BREE's serenely smiling face. We see REX, her husband, behind her, an expression of exasperation on his face.)NARRATOR: Bree Van De Kamp, who lives next door, brought baskets of muffins she baked from scratch. Bree was known for her cooking.(Flashback to: BREE, sitting at a sewing machine, making clothes.) NARRATOR: And for making her own clothes.(Cut to:BREE, garbed in work-wear, planting a tree.)NARRATOR: And for doing her own gardening.(Cut to:BREE, using a hand knife to slice open the cover of a stuffed chair.) NARRATOR: And for reupholstering her own furniture.(End of flashback. Resume to present.)NARRATOR: Yes, Bree's many talents were known throughout the neighbourhood. And everyone on Wisteria Lane thought of Bree as the perfect wife and mother. Everyone, that is, except her own family.(We see an exasperated REX, and her children - an annoyed ANDREW and a frazzled-looking DANIELLE - behind BREE, the very image of perfection. She carries a basket of baked goods in each hand as she walks up to PAUL and ZACH, looking sympathetic.)BREE: Paul, Zachary.ZACH: Hello Mrs. Van De Kamp.PAUL: Bree, you shouldn't have gone to all this trouble.(PAUL extends his hands to take the baskets from BREE, who moves the baskets out of his reach as he tries to take them from her.)BREE: It was no trouble at all. Now the basket with the red ribbon (holds up the basket)is filled with desserts for your guests. But the one with the blue ribbon (holds up the other basket) is just for you and Zachary. It's got rolls, muffins, breakfast type things.PAUL: Thank you.BREE: Well, the least I could do is make sure you boys had a decent meal to look forward to in the morning. I know you're out of your minds with grief.(REX, ANDREW and DANIELLE exchange long-suffering glances and mental eyeballing.)PAUL: Yes, we are.BREE: (beat) Of course, I will need the baskets back once you're done. (smiling serenely)(REX looks with disbelief at his wife.)PAUL: (taken back) Of course.(BREE walks off with the baskets, leaving the rest of them stunned. REX is literally open-mouthed with disbelief.)(Cut to:EXT. MEYER HOUSE - PORCH --- DAY)(SUSAN and her daughter JULIE comes out of their front door. SUSAN holds a flat, rectangular dish covered in tin foil. The wind blows the foil off, SUSAN snatches it back and recovers the dish as she and JULIE walk down the pathway. NARRATOR: Susan Meyer, who lives across the street, brought macaroni and cheese. Her husband Carl always teased her about her macaroni, saying it was the only thing she knew how to cook, and she rarely made it well. It was too salty the night she and Carl moved into their new house.(Flashback to: SUSAN and CARL sitting at their kitchen table, laughing and smiling.JULIE, as a baby, is sitting between them.)NARRATOR: It was too watery the night she found lipstick on Carl's shirt.(Cut to:SUSAN throws a towel at CARL, who catches it and throws it on the ground, as they yell at each other. JULIE, as a toddler, sits there watching her parents argue.) NARRATOR: She burned it the night Carl told her he was leaving her for his secretary.(Cut to:SUSAN and JULIE at about 13, sits at the table, the macaroni and cheese in the middle, untouched. CARL comes down the stairs carrying suitcases, and leaves via the kitchen door. SUSAN starts crying, as JULIE rubs her arm.)(End of flashback. Resume to present.)NARRATOR: A year had passed since the divorce. Susan was starting to think how nice it would be to have a man in her life, even one who would make fun of her cooking.JULIE: Mom, why would someone kill themselves?SUSAN: Well, sometimes people are so unhappy they think it's the only way they can solve their problems.JULIE: But Mrs. Young always seemed happy.SUSAN: Yeah, sometimes people pretend to be one way on the outside and they're totally different on the inside.JULIE: Oh you mean how Dad's girlfriend is always smiling and says nice things but deep down you just know she's a bi*ch.SUSAN: I don't like that word, Julie. But yeah, that's a great example.(Cut to: YOUNG HOUSE - LIVING ROOM -- WAKE --- DAY SUSAN and JULIE walk in the front door. SUSAN puts the dish down on the table and takes the tin foil off. JULIE joins the teenage group standing next to the table.)JULIE: Hey, what's going on?(Cut to:YOUNG HOUSE - KITCHEN -- WAKE --- DAY SUSAN walks in, dumping the tin foil in the bin. BREE, GABRIELLE and LYNETTE are sitting around at the kitchen table. LYNETTE is holding the baby.)SUSAN: Sorry I'm late.GABRIELLE: Hi Susan.LYNETTE: (smiles at SUSAN) Hey.(BREE looks up at SUSAN, looking upset. SUSAN takes her place at the table, and looks at the one empty chair in the table, where MARY ALICE used to sit. She picks up the coffee pot, and starts pouring coffee into a mug. We follow the stream of coffee into the mug.)(Flashback to: The same stream of coffee being poured into a mug. SUSAN looks up at MARY ALICE, who is pouring coffee into SUSAN'S mug. MARY ALICE sits back down in her seat and puts down the coffee jug.)MARY ALICE:(to SUSAN) So? What did Carl say when you confronted him? SUSAN: You'll love this, he said it doesn't mean anything, it was just sex.(They all groan.)BREE: Oh yes, page one of the philanderer's handbook.SUSAN: Yeah, and then he got this Zen look on his face, and he said, you know Susan, most men live lives of quiet desperation.LYNETTE: Please tell me you punched him.SUSAN: No, I said, really? And what do most women lead, lives of noisy fulfillment? GABRIELLE: (raises her eyebrows) Hmm.MARY ALICE: Good for you.SUSAN: I mean, of all people, did he have to bang his secretary? I had that woman over for brunch.GABRIELLE: It's like my grandmother always said, an erect penis doesn't have a conscience.LYNETTE: Even the limp ones aren't that ethical.BREE: This is half the reason I joined the NRA. (SUSAN looks at her.) Well, when Rex started going to those medical conferences, I wanted at the back of his mind that he had a loving wife at home, with a loaded Smith and Wesson.MARY ALICE: Lynnie? Tom's always away on business. Do you ever worry he might..? LYNETTE: Oh, please, the man's gotten me pregnant three times in four years. I wish he was having sex with someone else. (smiles)BREE: So Susan, is he going to stop seeing that woman?SUSAN: I don't know. (smiles, tearing up) I'm sorry you guys, I just... I just don't know how I'm going to survive this.MARY ALICE: Listen to me. (puts her hand on SUSAN's hand) We all have moments of desperation. But if we can face them head on, that's how we find out just how strong we really are.(SUSAN puts her other hand on top of MARY ALICE's hand, smiling at her.)(End of flashback. Resume to present.)BREE: Susan? Susan. (SUSAN withdraws her hand from the same position from the flashback.) I was just saying Paul wants us to go over on Friday. He needs us to go through Mary Alice's closet, and help pack up her things. He says he can't face doing it by himself.SUSAN: Sure, that's fine.BREE: Are you OK?SUSAN: Yeah. I'm just so angry. If Mary Alice was having problems, she should have come to us; she should have let us help her.GABRIELLE: What kind of problems could she have had? She was healthy, had a great home, a nice family. Her life was?-LYNETTE: -our life.GABRIELLE: No, if Mary Alice was having some sort of crisis, we'd have known. She lives 50 feet away, for god's sakes.SUSAN: Gabby, the woman killed herself. Something must've been going on. (They all look down and consider this point, as PAUL, unseen, leans against the living room doorway, eavesdropping on their conversation. He sips his drink, looking very shifty and suspicious, like he knows more than he's letting on.)(Cut to:YOUNG HOUSE - DINING ROOM -- WAKE --- DAY)(Food is set out on the table buffet-style. SUSAN walks into the room, where MIKE is spooning some of SUSAN's macaroni and cheese onto his plate)SUSAN: Oh, I wouldn't eat that if I were you.MIKE: Why?SUSAN: I made it, trust me. (MIKE prepares to take a bite) Hey, hey, do you have a death wish?MIKE: No, I just refuse to believe that anybody can screw up macaroni and cheese. (MIKE takes a bites of the macaroni, as SUSAN gestures apologetically, smiling.) MIKE: Oh my god. (makes a face)How did you?it tastes like it's burnt and undercooked.SUSAN: Yeah, I get that a lot. Here you go.(SUSAN gets a tissue and gives it to him, as he spits his mouthful of macaroni andcheese into the tissue.)MIKE: Thanks. I'm Mike Delfino, I just rented out the Sim's house next door. SUSAN: Susan Meyer, I live across the street.MIKE: Oh yeah, Mrs. Huber told me about you, said you illustrate children's books. SUSAN: Yeah I'm very big with the under 5 set. (MIKE laughs) What do you do? MIKE: Plumber. So if you ever have a clog. Or something.SUSAN: (laughs) Now that everybody's seen that I've brought something, I should probably just throw this out.(JULIE looks over to see SUSAN and MIKE flirting with each other, smiles. SUSAN takes the dish of macaroni and walks off. MIKE watches her as she leaves. She stops and looks back at MIKE. She smiles, then continues walking to the next room.) (Cut to:INT. YOUNG HOUSE - BACK ROOM WINDOW SEAT -- WAKE --- DAY LYNETTE struggles with the baby, covering it in a blanket. MRS. HUBER hurries up the path, sees LYNETTE through the window and comes in.)LYNETTE: (to baby) Ow! Ease up, you little vampire.MRS. HUBER: Lynette! I've been looking all over for you.LYNETTE: Oh. (smiles, distracted by the baby)MRS. HUBER:Are you aware of what your sons are doing?(LYNETTE's smile drops instantly)(Cut to:EXT. YOUNG HOUSE - POOL SIDE --- DAY The SCAVO kids are swimming in the pool, splashing, generally making lots of noise. Their nice shoes and clothes are discarded at the poolside.)SCAVO kids: Stop. Arrrggggh. Hah!(LYNETTE hurries down the path to the poolside holding the baby. She stops at the poolside, appalled at what she sees.)LYNETTE: What are you doing!? We are at a wake!PRESTON: When we got here, you said we could go in the pool.LYNETTE: (crouches down)I said you could go by the pool. Do you have your swimsuits on??PORTER: Yeah, we put them on under our clothes just before we left. LYNETTE: You three planned this?? Alright, that's it. Get out!PORTER: No!LYNETTE: No? I am your mother. You have to do what I say. Come on. PRESTON: We wanna swim and you can't stop us.(LYNETTE looks around at the whole neighbourhood watching, helpless. The SCAVO kids all float in the water, their arms crossed in defiance. Seeing this, LYNETTE raises her eyebrow and sets her face with angry resolve.)LYNETTE: (gives the baby to a man standing nearby) Here.(LYNETTE steps into the pool, holding her skirt as she walks down the pool steps towards the boys. The boys' mouths drop open in surprise.)LYNETTE: Get out. Or I will get in this pool and just grab you, get out! Get over here. Get over here. Get back or I'll kill you.(LYNETTE struggles in the pool with the boys, splashing around as the boys try to swim away from her.)LYNETTE: That's right, get over here. Go, go, go, ugh. Move it. Out. Get out. (PAUL and ZACH walk out by the pool, watching in amazement. SUSAN puts her hands over her mouth with embarrassment, as REX, ANDREW and DANIELLE, laughing in amazement, come out to watch. The water flies everywhere as LYNETTEstruggles to catch hold of her kids. PAUL looks down at his jacket as water splashes onto his suit. LYNETTE manages to grab onto PRESTON's foot, dragging him towards the edge of the pool, as she catches hold of PARKER's foot as well. She manages to pull them up the steps and out of the pool, herself soaking wet. She glares at PORTER floating in the water, who gets out of the pool in a hurry.LYNETTE takes the baby from the man, then goes up to PAUL, flustered, as the boys gather their clothes.)LYNETTE: Paul. We have to leave now. Once again, I am so sorry for your loss. (to kids) Go!(LYNETTE hurries the boys along the path as PAUL watches them leave. He turns, and looks into the pool. The camera moves into the pool, looking up at PAUL as he stares menacingly into the watery depths.)NARRATOR: Lynette shouldn't have been so concerned about my husband. He had other things on his mind. Things below the surface.CUT TO: [EXT. WISTERIA LANE --- DAWN](A newspaper boy on a bike rides along the road, throwing newspapers at each home as he rides by.)NARRATOR: The morning after my funeral, my friends and neighbours quietly went back to their busy, busy lives. Some did their cooking.(Cut to:INT. SCAVO HOUSE - KITCHEN --- DAY LYNETTE struggles with her kids in her home, as the boys throw cereal around.)NARRATOR: And some did their cleaning.(Cut to:INT. VAN DE KAMP HOUSE - BATHROOM --- DAY BREE kneels next to the toilet, holding a scrubber, scrubbing the toilet ferociously.)NARRATOR: And some did their yoga.(Cut to:INT. SOLIS HOUSE - FOYER --- DAY We look out at GABRIELLE, who strikes a yoga stance on a mat in front of her open door.)NARRATOR: Others did their homework.(Cut to:EXT. WISTERIA LANE --- DAY A soccer ball is kicked high in the air towards a house.)(Cut to:INT. DELFINO HOUSE - FOYER --- DAY The sound of a doorbell ringing. The door opens, and MIKE looks out at JULIE, who smiles apologetically.)JULIE: Hi.(MIKE's dog barks, and MIKE puts a hand on the dog's neck to calm it down. He looks at JULIE.)JULIE: I'm Julie, I kicked my soccer ball into your backyard.MIKE: Oh, OK. Well, let's go round and get it. (to dog) Stay.(Cut to:INT. MEYER HOUSE - SUSAN- WORK STUDIO --- DAY JULIE paces the floor walking back and forth, throwing the soccer ball up and down as she talks. SUSAN is working on her illustrations.)JULIE: (to SUSAN) His wife died a year ago, he wanted to stay in LA but there were too many memories. He's renting for tax purposes, but he's hoping to buy a place real soon.SUSAN: I can't believe you went over there.JULIE: Hey, I saw you both flirting at the wake. You're obviously into each other. Now that you know he's single, you can ask him out.SUSAN: Julie, I like Mr. Delfino, I do. It's just, I don't know if I'm ready to start dating yet.JULIE: Ugh, you need to get back out there. Come on. How long has it been sinceyou're had sex? (SUSAN's pen halts stroke. She turns to look at JULIE, open-mouthed.) Are you mad that I asked you that?SUSAN: No, I'm just trying to remember. (JULIE tilts her head to one side, smiling at SUSAN, who turns back to her drawing.) I don't wanna talk to you about my love life anymore, it weirds me out.JULIE: I wouldn't have said anything it's just?SUSAN: (turns around to look at JULIE) What?JULIE: I heard Dad's girlfriend asking if you'd dated anyone since the divorce, and Dad said he doubted it. (SUSAN looks down at her lap.) And then they both laughed. (SUSAN turns to look at JULIE, mouth open in indignation. That does it.)(Cut to:EXT. WISTERIA LANE --- DAY SUSAN, holding a pot-plant, hurries along the road and walks up the steps to MIKE's house to ring his doorbell. We hear the dog bark as MIKE opens the door.)MIKE: Hey, Susan.SUSAN: Hi Mike. (smiles)I brought you a little housewarming gift. I probably should've brought something by earlier, but...MIKE: Actually, you're the first in the neighbourhood to stop by.SUSAN: Really? (She laughs)NARRATOR: Susan knew she was lucky. An eligible bachelor had moved onto Wisteria Lane, and she was the first to find out. But she also knew that good news travels quickly.EDIE: (waving as she walks, holding a dish) Hello there!NARRATOR: (slow motion shot of Edie jogging towards MIKE and SUSAN) Edie Britt was the most predatory divorcee in a 5 block radius. Her conquests were numerous. (Flashback to: EDIE and a workman in her living room. She grabs him, as his toolbox drops on the ground with a crash.)NARRATOR: Varied?(Cut to:a tennis coach standing behind EDIE in her living room, helping her swing a tennis racquet with her right hand. She turns and kisses him, pushing him onto her couch.)NARRATOR: And legendary.(Cut to:EDIE, sitting on her couch. She looks up at a priest, and pulls him down on top of her. He yells, his Bible dropping onto the ground.)(End of flashback. Resume to present.)(EDIE walks up to the porch, pushing her sunglasses onto her head.)EDIE: Hi Susan, I hope I'm not interrupting. You must be Mike Delfino. Hi, I'm Edie. Britt. I live over there (points). Welcome to Wisteria Lane.(SUSAN shifts uncomfortably.)NARRATOR: Susan had met the enemy, and she was a slut.MIKE: Thank you, what's this?EDIE: Sausage Puttenesca. It's just something I threw together. (SUSAN looks at her disbelievingly.)MIKE: Thanks, Edie. (laughs) That's great. Uh, I'd invite you both in, but I was sorta in the middle of something.SUSAN: (overlapping EDIE) Oh, I'm late for an appointment anyway.EDIE: (overlapping SUSAN) Oh, no problem, I just wanted to say hi.MIKE: Well, thanks.(SUSAN and EDIE walk down the steps of the porch, and down the walkway.) NARRATOR: And just like that, the race for Mike Delfino had begun. For a moment,Susan wondered if her rivalry with Edie would remain friendly.EDIE: (turns suddenly) Oh, Mike. I heard you're a plumber?MIKE: Yeah.EDIE: Do you think you could stop by later tonight and take a look at my pipes? NARRATOR: But she was reminded that when it came to men? Women don't fight fair.MIKE: Sure.EDIE: Thanks. (EDIE smiles, following SUSAN down the path.) Bye Susan. (SUSAN waves halfheartedly as she walks in the opposite direction towards her home.) CUT TO: [INT. SOLIS HOUSE -- DINING ROOM --- DAY]GABRIELLE: [OS] You can't order me around like I'm a child!(GABRIELLE paces the floor, hands on her waist as CARLOS packs his suitcase for work)CARLOS: Gabrielle...GABRIELLE: No. No, no, no, I'm not going.CARLOS: It's business, Tanaka expects everyone to bring their wives. GABRIELLE: Every time I'm around that man, he tries to grab my ass. CARLOS: (puts his hand on GABRIELLE's shoulder)I made over $200,000 doing business with him last year. If he wants to grab your ass, you let him. (CARLOS walks out of the front door and down the porch steps. He stops at the bottom of the steps, and looks sideways to where JOHN is cutting a bush with a pair of gardening shears.)CARLOS: John!JOHN: (pricks his finger on a rose thorn) Ow. (turns around to look at CARLOS) Mr. Solis. You scared me.CARLOS: Why is that bush still there? I told you to dig it up last week.JOHN: I didn't have time last week.CARLOS: I don't wanna hear your excuses, just take care of it.(GABRIELLE walks out the front door and walks down the porch steps, putting her arms on her waist.)GABRIELLE: (to CARLOS) I really hate the way you talk to me.CARLOS: (walks up to her) And I really hate that I spent $15,000 on your diamond necklace that you couldn't live without. But I'm learning to deal with it. (JOHN sucks his finger, watching the argument) So. Can I tell Tanaka we'll be there tomorrow night?GABRIELLE: (turns sideways to look at JOHN) John. We have bandages top shelf in the kitchen.JOHN: Thanks, Mrs. Solis. (walks between CARLOS and GABRIELLE, up the porch steps and into the house.)GABRIELLE: (looks at CARLOS coolly) Fine. I'll go. But I'm keeping my back pressed against the wall the entire time.CARLOS: (smiles as he walks backwards) See? Now this is what a marriage is all about - compromise. (turns around and walks towards his car)(Cut to:INT. SOLIS HOUSE - KITCHEN/DINING ROOM --- DAY JOHN is putting a bandage on his finger. GABRIELLE walks in the front door and comes up to him.) GABRIELLE: Is your finger ok?JOHN: Yeah, yeah, it's just a small cut.GABRIELLE: Let me see. (takes his hand, and starts kissing his finger) Mmmm. (She puts her arms around his neck, kissing him as she sliding her hands up his back.。

Episode 01.06 - Running to Stand Still--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Mary Alice begins speaking as the camera pans over to Gabrielle。

Previously on "desperate housewives"Zach:I know why my mom killed herself.Mary Alice Voiceover:Secrets were revealed.Gabrielle:This is getting really weird.I think we should go to the police.Mary Alice Voiceover:Relationships got complicated.Gabrielle:Mama Solis. What are you doing here?Mama Solis：So you think she's cheating on you?Carlos：I think so.Mama Solis：I'll take care of it.Rex: We got a call --something about a break-in.Policeman:I thought I'd seen a lot on the job,but this is something else.Mary Alice Voiceover:And the mystery...Bree: Zach, why did you do this?Zach:I don't know.Mary Alice Voiceovereepened.Rex:Zach.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Mary Alice Voiceover:Suburbia is a battleground, an arena for all forms of domestic combat. Husbands clash with wives, parents cross swords with children, but the bloodiest battles often involve women and their mothers-in-law.[Carlos's house](Inside the house, where the two of them and Mama Solis eat breakfast.)Mary Alice Voiceover:The war for control of Carlos began the night he proposed, and Gabrielle had been losing ground to Juanita ever since. From the prenuptial agreement which she reluctantly signed, to the selection of wedding music she despised, the color of the house paint she hadn't wanted ... Gabrielle had suffered one defeat after another. And now that Juanita suspected her daughter-in-law of having an affair, it had became increasintly apparent that in this war...Yoa Lin: "Mrs. Solis, I'll be at the market."Mary Alice Voiceover:"...no prisoners would be taken."Gabrielle: "Thank you, Yoa Lin."Mama Solis: "I don't see why you have her."Gabrielle: "It's a big house. I need help."Mama Solis: "It's only called help when you do some of the work yourself."Gabrielle: "I supervise."Mama Solis: "You pay her $300 a week. That's $15,000 a year. Carlos, you always say how you're not putting away enough for retirement!"Carlos: "You know, baby, it would be a good idea if we cut back on expenses."Gabrielle: "You expect me to take care of this place all by myself?"Carlos: "Other women manage..."(He gets up from the table and Gabrielle looks at Mama Solis, who smiles triumphantly. )--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Gabrielle's Bedroom](Carlos lies on the bed, reading, when Gabrielle glides into the room in a revealing outfit of bra and underwear. She clears her throat, crawls on the bed, and straddles Carlos. She kisses him, and then sighs.)Carlos: "Mmmm... that's nice.."Gabrielle: "You like that?"Carlos: "Oh yeah."Gabrielle: "God, I'm gonna miss this, Carlos."Carlos: "What do you mean?"Gabrielle: "Well, since, I'm gonna have to be doing the cooking, and the cleaning, and all the shopping, like the other wives..."Carlos: "Mmm hmm..."Gabrielle: "...I'm going to be exhausted at night--just like all the other wives ... till I build up my stamina, of course, but that might take a couple years..."(She kisses Carlos down his body as he frowns.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------(The Next Morning)Mary Alice Voiceover:"Sadly for Juanita, she had ignored the first rule of war..."(Carlos comes down the stairs.)Mama Solis: "Good morning, Carlos."Carlos (emphatically): "The maid stays."(He leaves.)Mary Alice Voiceover:"Never underestimate your enemy!"(Mama Solis looks up to the staircase where Gabrielle stands, triumphant.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Outside of Paul Young's House; Yard Sale]Mary Alice Voiceover:"Of the many suburban rituals, none is quite so cherished as the neighborhood yard sale. The shoppers come to sift through the discarded belongings of someone they don't really know, in hopes of finding bargains they don't really need, each so determined to save a few pennies, they often miss hidden treasures..."(Paul puts things in a box and closes the top, revealing that the box is labeled "Baby Stuff.") (Susan walks up to him.)Susan: "Hey, Paul."Paul: "Hi, Susan."Susan: "I got to say, I was a little surprised to see Mary Alice's award for sale. She got it for doing charity work, from the Chamber of Commerce."Paul: "Zach and I are moving. We don't need to carry any more with us than is absolutely necessary."Susan: "That makes sense. Still, I just want to make sure you didn't want to keep it, for Zach, something to remember his mother by."Paul: "Zach doesn't need a piece of glass to remember his mother. I'm out of newspaper." (He picks up a yellow/green blanket to wrap the glass.) "Here, let's call it ten bucks for everything." Susan: "Great. Speaking of Zach, I haven't seen him around lately."Paul: "He's been a bit depressed. I thought he could use a change of scenery, so I sent him to stay with relatives."Susan: "Oh, which ones?"Paul: "You don't know them."Susan: "So, how'd you get the fat lip?"Paul: "The usual way. Asking too many questions."(Paul walks away and Susan picks up the box and walks over to where Gabrielle is.) Gabrielle: "Did you find out where Zach is?"Susan: "No, but I can tell you this much. He's not staying with relatives."(Carlos and Mama Solis stand off in a corner. Mama Solis looks at a record album while Carlos surveys the crowd.) Carlos: "It's driving me crazy, mama. It could be any one of these guys she's having the affair with."Mama Solis: "Don't worry about it. I'm not letting her out of my sight."Carlos: "Now, who the hell is that? And look at the way she's touching him. You think that's the guy she's having the affair with? "Mama Solis: "Carlos, don't be stupid. A guy she talks to in public isn't someone you're gonna worry about."Carlos: "So it's someone that she doesn't talk to. What do I have to do? Beat up every guy in town?"Mama Solis: "Marriage takes work!"(They walk away, passing by John, who looks after them.)(Lynette, Bree, and Susan stand talking to each other. Gabrielle joins them soon after.) Lynette: "I'm not surprised that he's playing it close to the vest. Paul knows we're on to him." Bree: "Zach said Mary Alice killed herself because of something that he had done, something bad. Is there anyone else who'd know what he was talking about?"Susan: "No. That's why we have to find him. It's the only way we'll know the truth."Bree: "It just doesn't make any sense. Zach is such a sweet kid. I can't imagine him doing anything that terrible."Gabrielle: "Well, he did break into your house. I mean, the kid is obviously troubled in some way."(Bree sighs.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Silvercrest Juvenile Rehabilitation Center](Inside, Paul and a doctor stare through the window on the door of Zach's room. He sits on his bed, his head bowed as he eats from a tray of food.)Dr. Sicher: "Severe depression. Borderline personality disorder. Zach is a deeply troubled young man."Paul: "I'm aware of that. What are you giving him?"Dr. Sicher: "Some antidepressants and a mood stabilizer."Paul: "Good."Dr. Sicher: "I'm also recommending extensive psychotherapy, to help him with everything herepressed..."Paul: "I don't think so."Dr. Sicher: "Mr. Young, I can't just medicate him indefinitely."Paul: "Forget the Freud and stick with the drugs. No new treatments without my permission." (He walks away.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[School Gym](Lynette is seated with a group of women gathered near a stage.)Ms. Truesdale: "I think this is going to be a great version of Little Red Riding Hood, and it is your involvement that make the plays here at Barcliffe Academy so special. Thank you." (clapping) "And now, I would like to turn over the next part of our meeting to our parent coordinator, the amazing Maisy Gibbons."Maisy: "Thank you, Ms. Truesdale. Now, before everyone leaves, we have new copies of the script up here. Tilda and Francis and I went to the rehearsal yesterday, and we were a little troubled by the ending. Killing the wolf. It says the wrong message to our kids. And we believe that animals should only be euthanized as a last resort."(Lynette laughs.)Maisy: "Do you find something amusing?"Lynette: "I'm sorry, I thought you were kidding."Maisy: "No."Lynette: "Oh, okay."Maisy: "So in our version, the wolf is aggressive because he has a thorn in his paw. And the woodsman will take out the thorn, and send Mr. Wolf on his way."Lynette: "I'm sorry, aren't we doing Little Red Riding Hood?"Maisy: "Yes."Lynette: "So then you are aware that the wolf is a bad guy. He eats Little Red's grandma. If you let him go, he's just going to chow down on another defenseless old lady."Maisy: "I'm sorry, and you are?"Lynette: "I'm Lynette Scavo. My twins just joined. They're playing oak trees."Maisy: "Oh, of course. Lynette. Let's see, you are ... signed up to take tickets the night of the show, is that right?"Lynette: "Yeah."Maisy: "Well, with all due respect, let's leave the creative suggestions to the mothers who have assumed the heavy lifting, shall we?"Lynette: "Sure. Whatever."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Bree's House](Gabrielle and Mama Solis sit at Bree's kitchen table, drinking coffee Bree pours for them.) Bree: "I must say, I'm jealous of how much time you two spend together. My mother-in-law would never want to hang out with me all day."Gabrielle: "She sounds nice."(Danielle walks into the house with John.)Danielle: "Hey!"Bree: "Oh, hey there, you two!"Gabrielle: "Hi, John."John: "Mrs. Solis."Gabrielle: "I wasn't aware you two were friends."John: "Yeah, we go to the same school."Gabrielle: "Of course you do."Danielle: "Mom, if you need anything, we'll be upstairs in my room studying."Bree: "Have fun."(Danielle and John leave.)Gabrielle: "Doesn't it make you nervous, a boy alone upstairs with Danielle?"Bree: "Oh no, I don't worry about John. Both he and Danielle are in the abstinence club." (Gabrielle chokes and spews out coffee.)Gabrielle: "The coffee is a little hot."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Outside Susan's House](Susan opens up her mailbox and takes out her mail. When she turns around, she sees Paul getting into his car across the street.)Mary Alice Voiceover:"Susan was infuriated by Paul's evasive answers."(Susan stares at Paul across the street.)Paul: "Hey!"(He waves at her.)Mary Alice Voiceover:"She was convinced he was deliberately hiding Zach, and hiding the truth. She hoped that finding one would lead to the other. To succeed, Susan would have to be evasive herself."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Mrs. Greenberg's House](Susan rings the doorbell of Mrs. Greenberg's house, holding a package of eggs.)Mrs. Greenberg: "Susan. Long time, no see."Susan: "Mrs. Greenberg. Do you remember those two eggs I let you borrow last Christmas?" (She opens up her carton eggs and motions to the two empty spaces in the container.) Susan: "I need those back."Mrs. Greenberg: "Well gosh, honey, I'm fresh out, but if you want, I could run to the store." Susan: "Oh, forget about it, it's not that important, but since I'm here, do you still have that old hatchback sitting in your garage? Can I borrow it tomorrow?"Mrs. Greenberg: "You want to borrow my car?"Susan: "Just for a couple of hours."Mrs. Greenberg: "Well, I'm not sure. Do you know how to drive a stick?"Susan: "Yes, I think so. I learned in college. It's like riding a bike, right?"Mrs. Greenberg: "I'm not sure, dear."Susan: "It's not big deal. It's just for a couple of hours. I let you borrow my eggs for a whole year."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Dr. Goldfine's Office]Dr. Goldfine: "First off, I'm very pleased with the work we've done in our sessions thus far. We'remaking excellent progress."Bree: "Thank you, I feel really good about it."Dr. Goldfine: "But there are a few areas of your marriage we haven't covered yet."Bree: "Oh, really. Like what?"Rex: "Um, I've told Dr. Goldfine in our private sessions that I'm not happy with our sex life." Dr. Goldfine: "And Rex feels when you two have intercourse, you're not as connected as you could be."Bree: "Connected?"Rex: "Well yeah, it's like you're thinking about other things. Is your hair getting messed up? Did you remember to buy the toothpaste? You're just not there."Dr. Goldfine: "This kind of disconnect is often a symptom of a deeper problem."Rex: "So, we were talking, and the idea of a sexual surrogate came up."Dr. Goldfine: "This is a licensed professional who'd work with you as a couple on solving whatever sexual problems you may be having. I have an excellent referral."Bree: "And what would this sexual surrogate person do?"Rex: "Well, she would coach us."Bree: "She!"Dr. Goldfine: "She's very discrete. You'll hardly notice she's there."Bree: "Oh. So she would be in the room with us, while we make love?"Rex: "Yes, helping us to achieve maximum sexual potential."Dr. Goldfine: "Do you have any questions?"Bree: "Just one. How much longer is your midlife crisis going to last, because it is really starting to tick me off!"(She gets up and walks out.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Lynette's House](The four women are seated around the dining room table, cards in front of them. Mama Solis is sitting off to the side, knitting.)Lynette: "All right. I think everyone is down for a nap. We've got no more than an hour. Let's get cracking. Five car draw, nothing wild."Bree: "So how is it going with Mike, Susan?"Susan: "It's going, finally. We have our first official date next week. I think he's taking me to see a play or something."Lynette: "Might I suggest the Barcliffe Academy production of Little Red Riding Hood?" Susan: "Oh, that's right, the twins-stage debut!"Gabrielle: "Are they having fun?"Lynette: "Sure, they get to play oak trees. I'm the one who has to deal with all the drama behind the scenes."Bree: "Oh, I take it you've met Maisy Gibbons."Lynette: "She's a total nightmare. I guess I shouldn't have challenged her."Bree: "Oh, dear."Lynette: "Because now no one on the play committee even wants to talk to me."Bree: "Oh, Maisy does love to rule her little kingdom."Susan: "It hasn't really changed since Girl Scouts. Girls smile at you to your face, and thenbehind your back, they make fun of you because you're the only one not shaving your legs yet." (Gabrielle gets up and goes to the living room where chips and dip are on a platter. She takes some as the women talk.)Lynette: "That would have never happened in Boy Scouts. When I worked, mostly with men, I preferred the way they fought. A guy takes his opponent on, face to face, and once he's won, he's top dog. It's primitive, but it's fair."Susan: "And a lot less sneaky."Gabrielle: "Isn't it sexist of us to generalize like this?"(Gabrielle goes to the window and peeks outside, seeing John working outside across the street.)Lynette: "It's science, Gabrielle.Sociologists have documented this stuff."Gabrielle: "Well, who am I to argue with sociologists? (pauses) Wow this, uh, this guacamole has got a kick. I'm going to run to the little girls' room. You guys go ahead, I might be a while." Lynette: "I hate playing three handed poker. Let's take a break."Mama Solis: "I'll play!"Bree: "You play poker?"Mama Solis: "I used to play a little with my grandfather."Susan: "ull up a chair."Mama Solis: "Oh, I notice you were just playing for chips, huh. My grandfather used to say, it's always more fun to play for money."Lynette: "Why not? Fifty cents a bet?"Mama Solis: "Make it a buck." She pulls a wad of cash out of her brassiere. "Three raise limit. Twenty dollar buy in."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Bathroom](Gabrielle closes the door to the bathroom and checks her appearance in the mirror. Then she opens the window and peers down. Climbing over the windowsill, she falls outside, landing with a shriek. She looks over the fence to where John is mowing the lawn. She climbs over the fence by stepping on stacked wood, knocking them over. Once over the top of the fence, she falls. John rushes over.)John: "Mrs. Solis! What are you doing?"Gabrielle: "Why haven't you returned any of my phone calls?"John: "I've been busy."Gabrielle: "Yeah, I've seen who you've been busy with."John: "Danielle? Come on, I mean, she's just a friend."Gabrielle: "Well, before you get any friendlier, let me remind you, I can do things to you she can't even pronounce."John: "Well, a lot of good it does me with your mother-in-law following you around all the time. Look, maybe we should just cool it for awhile."Gabrielle: "Oh, no, John, please don't say that. I have everything under control."(They kiss.)Gabrielle: "Now give me a boost."(He helps her climb back over the fence.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Lynette's House](Gabrielle walks back into the dining room.)Gabrielle: "Hey! So what did I miss?"Mama Solis: "Not much, just a few friendly hands of poker with the girls."(There is a huge stack of money in front of Mama Solis as she pulls it all towards her. The other women look stunned.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Play Rehearsal]Maisy: I'm sorry I'm late.As I'm sure you have all heard, Celia Bond broke her wrist playing tennis, which means we are now in desperate need of someone to do the costumes. I'm keeping my fingers crossed here. Are there any volunteers?"Lynette (standing up): "I'll do it."Maisy: "Really, that's a ... do you know how to sew?"Lynette (sits down): "Absolutely."Maisy: "Well, great, uh, thank you, Lynette!" (clapping)Lynette (stands up again): "Okay. So, now that I'm going to do some, heavy lifting, I believe I have a right to talk about the changes made to the script?"(She pauses. Nobody says anything, so she rushes forward to stand next to Maisy and address the group.)Lynette: "Um, ladies. We all grew up with Little Red Riding Hood, and we survived it, scary stuff and all, so I say, to hell with political correctness, let our kids experience this classic like it was meant to be enjoyed. Let's kill the damn wolf, and just put on the best show we can." (clapping) Maisy: "Thank you, Lynette, for that impassioned speech, but I believe that ship has sailed." Jordana: "No, it hasn't. We still have time to change the ending back."Ms. Truesdale: "And you know, Maisy, it is just a fairy tale - I don't think it will upset the children."Maisy: "Well, I think you are wrong."Lynette: "Well, that's what's so great about being in a democracy. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. Also, everyone has a right to vote. So all in favor of the woodsman going medieval on the big bad wolf's ass..."(She raises her hand. And slowly, the others follow, except for Maisy, who glares at Lynette.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Outside of Paul's House](Sitting in her borrowed car, hidden mostly from view, Susan puts on a pair of sunglasses and watches Paul get into his SUV and drive away. Then she follows him - after a lurching start.) Susan: "Oh!"(He pulls into a parking lot and gets out. Susan slows down and looks at the sign stating "Silvercrest Juvenile Rehabilitation Center.")--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Restaurant](Bree is sitting alone at her table when she notices Dr. Goldfine sit down at another table, also alone, with a book.)(Bree takes a sip of wine, then gets up and goes to his table.)Bree: "Dr. Goldfine."Dr. Goldfine: "Bree."Bree: "You're dining alone?"Dr. Goldfine: "Actually, I am."Bree: "Well, what a coincidence. So am I. It seems a shame for us to eat by ourselves. Shall I, pull up a chair?"Dr. Goldfine: "Bree, it's nothing personal, but I never socialize with clients."Bree: "Oh," (she pauses. )"Oh, I get it. I'm so sorry, of course, it's, it's inappropriate. It's just that after what happened yesterday, there's so much I need to say because..." (she pauses.) "I suppose it can wait."(She walks back over to her table and sits down, taking a sip from her glass of wine. Then they take turns looking at each other. And finally he waves her to come back over and sit across from him. Bree breathes a sigh of relief and gets up to join him.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Gabrielle's House](Gabrielle is on the phone.)Gabrielle: "No, Lynette, I'm sorry, Juanita's taking a bath. Well, how much did she win from you? Jeez," (She laughs.) "Yeah, I guess she'll take a check. Okay. All right. Bye."Carlos: "What was that about?"Gabrielle: "It turns out your mother is quite the card shark."Carlos: "You let her play cards? How long did she play?"Gabrielle: "Not that long, why?"(Carlos walks away from her.) "Carlos, what is it?"Carlos: "I never told you this, but my mother had a serious gambling problem."Gabrielle: "Was this before we were married?"Carlos: "Yeah. It was bad. She went into debt. She dipped into her savings, started hocking jewelry..."Gabrielle: "Honey, it was only a small neighborhood game."Carlos: "But it doesn't take much for her to fall off the wagon. I know she seems like a very strong woman, but..."Gabrielle: "She has a major weakness. Honey, oh,"( she embraces him.) "It's okay. You were right to tell me this."(She smiles.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Restaurant]Dr. Goldfine. "And you understand I have to treat this as a session."Bree: "Of course, that's fine. Shall I include the meal?"Dr. Goldfine: "Oh no. We'll split that."(Bree writes a check for $180.00 payable to Dr. Albert Goldfine and hands it over.)Dr. Goldfine: "So, let's talk about yesterday. You think there might have been some truth in what Rex said?"Bree: "No, I don't."Dr. Goldfine: "Bree, you know, it's not uncommon for people experiencing sexual repression to distance themselves from the act."Bree: "Is that how you see me? As some sort of prude who just lays there like a cold fish? I love sex."Dr. Goldfine: "All right."Bree: "I love everything about it. The sensations, the smells. I especially love the feel of a man. All that muscle and sinew pressed against my body. And then, when you add friction. Mmm ... The tactile sensation of running my tongue over a man's nipple ever so gently. And then there's the act itself - two bodies becoming one in that final eruption of pleasure. To be honest, the only thing I don't like about sex is the scrotum. I mean, obviously it has its practical applications, but I'm just not a fan."Waiter: "Can I get you something?"Dr. Goldfine: "Uh, just the check, please."Waiter: "Sir, you haven't ordered yet."Dr. Goldfine: "Oh."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Gabrielle's Car](Gabrielle and Mama Solis drive up to "The Torch Lake Casino.")Mama Solis: "We're not shopping?"Gabrielle: "Oh, I thought we would stop here for lunch first. This place has the best buffet in town. All you can eat crab legs. Oh no!"Mama Solis: "What's wrong? Let's go!" (Mama is already out of the car.)Gabrielle: "I didn't realize how late it was. They're only holding the suede mini for me until two. If we stay, I'll never make it. We'll just have lunch at the mall."Mama Solis: "Wait, uh, I'l really in the mood for crab legs. Why don't you just drop me off, and you can come back."Gabrielle: "Well, if the mall is crowded, it might take over an hour."Mama Solis: "It's a buffet. There's no rush!"(Mama Solis rushes inside. Gabrielle picks up her cell phone and calls somebody as she drives away.)Gabrielle: "Hi John. Motel. Ten minutes. Be there."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Play Rehearsal]Lynette (to a child in a costume): "All right. Off you go. Thanks."Maisy: "Ooh, Lynette. I couldn't help but notice, you forgot the coonskin on that hunter's coonskin cap."Lynette: "Oh, yeah, huh, it was a creative call. Look, I'm in the middle of a costume crisis, and if I don't take a few shortcuts, I'll never finish."Maisy: "Well, Jordana Guist manages to get her work done. She runs the concessions, paints the sets, and still has time to take care of her three kids and a husband. Now, we can't have the students suffer just because you don't understand the concept of time management." Lynettte: "I hardly think the kids are going to suffer without a clump of fur on their heads." Maisy: "Okay, I'll make a creative call. We'll cut the oak trees. That forest is looking a little dense, anyway."Lynette: "My boys are the oak trees."Maisy: "Are they? Well, I wouldn't worry. We'll find something for them to do back stage. That's。