英语小笑话
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第 1 页 共 13 页 英语小笑话
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第 2 页 共 13 页 英语小笑话
英语小笑话（通用20篇）
英语小笑话作为一种城市化的民间口头创作体裁，是一种重要的交际手段。下面是本店铺为大家收集的简短的英语小笑话，希望对大家有帮助!
英语小笑话 1
A Useful Way 一个有效的方法
Father: Jack， why do you drink so much water？
Jack: I have just had an apple， Dad。
Father: What"s that got to do with it？
Jack: I forgot to wash the apple。
爸爸：杰克，你干嘛喝这么多水呀？
杰克：我刚才吃了个苹果，爸爸。
爸爸：可是这跟喝水有什么关系呢？
杰克：我忘了洗苹果呀。
英语小笑话 2
After supper， the parents were busy playing mah-jong with
the guests。 At this point the mother thought of something and
said to her son who was watching TV， "Honey， go see if the
kitchen light is on or not？" After a while， her son returnedand
said， "Ma， the kitchen is so dark that I cannot see it at all。
第 3 页 共 13 页 "
晚饭后，父亲和母亲都忙着和客人玩麻将，这时母亲忽然想起点儿事来，便对正在看电视的儿子说道：宝贝，去看看厨房里的灯是不是还开着呢？ 过了一会儿，儿子回来说：妈，厨房里太黑了，我根本就看不见。
英语小笑话 3
Toms eXcuse 汤姆的借口
Teacher: Tom， why are you late for school every day？
Tom: Every time I e to the corner， a sign says， School-Go
Slow。
教师：汤姆，您为什么每一天上学迟到？
汤姆：我每次走过拐角，一个路标上头写着：学校----慢行。
英语小笑话 4
"EXcuse me，but the seat youve taken is mine。"
"Yours？Can you prove it？"
"Yes，I put a cup of ice cream on it。"
"请原谅，你占了我的位置。"
"你的位置？你能征明这点吗？"
"能，我在位置上放了杯冰激凌。"
英语小笑话 5
Two young boys were spending the night at their
grandparents house。 At bedtime， the two boys knelt beside
第 4 页 共 13 页 their beds to say their prayers， when the younger one began
praying at the top of his lungs: "I pray for a bicycle。 I pray
for a new toy。"
两个小男孩在祖父母家过夜。睡觉的时候，两个小男孩跪在床边开始祈祷，这时小一些的孩子扯开嗓子大声喊道：我祈求得到一辆自行车。我祈求有一个新玩具。
His older brother leaned over， nudged him and said， "Why
are you shouting your prayers？ God isnt deaf。"
他的哥哥靠过来，用肘轻碰他说：你为什么这么大声喊叫呢？上帝又不是聋子。
To which the little brother replied， "No， but Grandma is!"
弟弟回答说：是的，可是奶奶听不到呀！
英语小笑话 6
Where is the father？
Two brothers were looking at some beautiful paintings。
"Look，" said the elder brother。 "How nice these paintings
are!"
"Yes，" said the younger， "but in all these paintings there
is only the mother and the children。 Where is the father？"
The elder brother thought for a moment and then eXplained，
"Obviously he was painting the pictures。"
父亲在哪儿？
第 5 页 共 13 页 兄弟俩在看一些漂亮的油画。
看，哥哥说，这些画多漂亮呀!
是啊，弟弟说道，可是在所有这些画中，仅有妈妈和孩子。那爸爸去哪儿了呢？
哥哥想了会儿，然后解释道：很明显，他当时正在画这些画呗。
英语小笑话 7
The poor husband
"You cant imagine how difficult it is for me to deal with
my wife，" the man plained to his friend。 "She asks me a question，
then answers it herself， and after that she eXplained to me
for half an hour why my answer is wrong。
可怜的丈夫
你根本无法想象和我妻子打交道是多么的难，一个男人对他的朋友诉苦说，她问我一个问题，然后自我回答了，过后又花半个小时跟我解释为什么我的答案是错的。
英语小笑话 8
Put your feet in
The school girl was sitting with her feet streched far out
into the aisle ，and was busily chewing gum， when the teacher
espied her。 "Mary !" called the teacher sharply。 "Yes，Madam？" questioned the pupil ， "Take that gum out of your mouth and
put your feet in!"
第 6 页 共 13 页 把脚放进去
一个女学生坐在座位上，嘴里起劲地嚼着口香糖，脚却伸到课桌间的走道里，被教师发现了。玛丽!教师严厉地叫她。什么事，教师？这女学生问。把口香糖从嘴里拿出来，把脚放进去。
英语小笑话 9
A father of five came home with a toy， summoned his children
and asked which one of them should be given the present， Who
is the most obedient， never talks back to mother and does
everything he or she is told？ he inquired。 There was silence
and then a chorus of voices: You play with it， Daddy!
一个有五个孩子的父亲带着一件玩具回到家里，把孩子们召集来问这件礼物应当给谁。谁最听话，从不和妈妈顶嘴，让干什么就干什么？他问道。大家都不吭声。过了一会儿，孩子们异口同声地说：爸爸，您玩儿吧。
英语小笑话 10
Intelligent son
One day， the father lets eight year-old son send a letter，
the son took the letter ， the father then remembered didnt
write the address and addressees name on the envelope。
After the son es back， the father asks him: "You have thrown
