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英语短笑话带翻译笑话是实际生活中客观存在的，作为文学式样，它的特征是戏谑、讽刺，其功能是启迪、警示。
小编精心收集了英语短笑话带翻译，供大家欣赏学习!英语短笑话带翻译篇1Mother: Mary, why do you yell and scream so much? Play quietly like Eddie. See, he doesn't make a sound.Mary: Of course he doesn't. Mom, it's part of the game we are playing. He is Daddy coming home late, and I'm you.妈妈：玛丽，你为什么这样大喊大叫的? 为什么不能像艾迪那样安安静静的玩儿呢?你看艾迪一声儿都不出。
玛丽：妈妈，艾迪当然不会出声了，因为我们俩正在玩爸爸回家迟到的游戏呢，他扮演爸爸，我扮演你。
英语短笑话带翻译篇2On the way home after watching a ballet performance, the kindergarten teacher asked her students what they thought of it. The smallest girl in the class said she wished the dancers were taller so that they would not have to stand on their toes all the time.在观看完芭蕾舞表演回家的路上，幼儿园老师问学生的观后感。
班上最小的女孩说，她希望舞蹈演员可以长得更高一点儿，那么他们就不用整天踮着脚尖了。
英语短笑话带翻译篇3Half or Five Tenths?Teacher: Would you rather have one half of an orange or five tenths?Gerald: I'd much rather have the half.Teacher: Think carefully, and tell me why.Gerald: Because you lose too much juice when you cut theorange into five tenths.半个还是十分之五老师：你愿意要半个柑橘，还是十分之五个柑橘?杰拉得：我宁可要半个。
英文粗语脏话一.优雅骂人1. Stop complaining! 别发牢骚！2. You make me sick! 你真让我恶心！3. What’s wrong with you? 你怎么回事？4. You shouldn’t have done that! 你真不应该那样做!5. You’re a jerk! 你是个废物/混球！6. Don’t talk to me like that! 别那样和我说话!7. Who do you think you are? 你以为你是谁？8. What’s your problem? 你怎么回事啊？9. I hate you! 我讨厌你！10. I don’t want to see your face! 我不愿再见到你！11. You’re crazy! 你疯了!12. Are you insane/crazy/out of your mind? 你疯了吗？（美国人绝对常用！）13. Don’t bother me. 别烦我。
14. Knock it off. 少来这一套。
15. Get out of my face. 从我面前消失！16. Leave me alone. 走开。
17. Get lost.滚开！18. Take a hike! 哪儿凉快哪儿歇着去吧。
19. You piss me off. 你气死我了。
20. It’s none of your business. 关你屁事！21. What’s the meaning of this? 这是什么意思？22. How dare you! 你敢！23. Cut it out. 省省吧。
24. You stupid jerk! 你这蠢猪！25. You have a lot of nerve. 脸皮真厚。
26. I’m fed up. 我厌倦了。
27. I can’t take it anymore. 我受不了了！（李阳老师常用）28. I’ve had enough of your garbage. 我听腻了你的废话。
![20个英语笑话爆笑超短【英语翻译笑话】[修改版]](https://img.taocdn.com/s1/m/a8884e71ec3a87c24128c47c.png)
1．we two who and who？咱俩谁跟谁阿2．how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你，怎么老是你？3．you don"t bird me,i don"t bird you你不鸟我，我也不鸟你4．you have seed i will give you some color to see see,pothers ！together up ！你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！5．hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!! 有事起奏，无事退朝6．you me you me彼此彼此7．you give me stop!!你给我站住！8．know is know noknow is noknow知之为知之，不知为不知...9．watch sister表妹10．dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse" son can make hole!!龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子大地洞11．american chinese not enough美中不足12．one car e one car go ,two car pengpeng,people die车祸现场描述13．heart flower angry open心花怒放14．go past no mistake past走过路过，不要错过15．小明：i am sorry!老外：i am sorry too!小明：i am sorry three!老外：what are you sorry for?小明：i am sorry five!16．if you want money,i have no;if you want life,i have one!要钱没有，要命一条17．i call li old big. toyear 25.我叫李老大，今年25。
简短的英语笑话带翻译篇一：短篇英语笑话10则带翻译短篇英语笑话10则带翻译① Goldfish金鱼Stan: I won 92 goldfish. Fred: Where are you going to keep them? Stan: In the bathroom 。
Fred: But what will you do when you want to take a bath? Stan: Blindfold（蒙眼睛）them! =================================================================== 斯丹：我赢了92 条金鱼。
弗雷德：你想在哪儿养它们？斯丹：浴室。
弗雷德：但是你想洗澡时怎么办？斯丹：蒙住它们的眼睛！② The Revenge 欺骗的代价欺骗的代价Old Farmer Johnson was dying. The family was standing around his bed. With a low voice he said to his wife: "When I'm dead I want you to marry farmer Jones." Wife: "No, I can't marry anyone a er you." Johnson: "But I want you to." Wife: "But why?" Johnson: "Jones once cheated me in a horse deal!" =================================================================== 老农约翰逊就要死了。
他的家人都站在床边。
1. 有次房东问我did u eat anyting yet? 我说no.她听后重复了一遍so u didn’t eat anyting. 我说yes…房东老太太犹豫了下又问did u eat？我说no. 她接着说s o u didn’t eat.我说yes ……估计她当时要崩溃了2. 刚上班不久，有个公司的A/R打电话来催支票，我循例问了一下他是哪间公司打来的，那男的很有礼貌的说：“Thi s is xxx calling from Beach Brother.” 听懂了很开心，不过由于对公司名字还不熟，心想先用笔记下来公司名，省得等下忘记了，正得意忘形之间，顺嘴开始拼写人家公司的名字，还说得一本正经：”b.i.t.c.h……bitch, correc t?”。
那男的终于还是没能忍住怒火，近似于怒吼似的对我喊道：”NO!!! B.E.A.C.H…..BEACH!!!!!!”接下来的一年里，没再跟这间公司有过任何生意往来……汗3. 读语言学校的时候，一哥们很爱讲，和ESL老师聊天练习英语，口沫横飞了半天，那老师很生气的说dont speak chinese to me.4. 我男朋友以前在温哥华乘skytrain的时候，一个白人女人说：I am sorry. 他直接说: you are welcome. 对方都呆了。
5. 我一个朋友,想在家做饭,家里没有油,就去超市买了一瓶回来,开火,放油,然后锅里开始出现大量泡沫,接着烧了起来。
回头一问房东,他买的是洗洁精。
6. 第一次跟老外去打painball，玩的是抢旗的那种。
由于第一次玩，一直跟着个看起来很专业的队友跑，一路上躲着子弹跑到对方的base. 我们人都挂了，对方就剩一个人在看老家。
就听那老外跟我说了一大堆术语，我也没听懂。
他看我没听懂就跟我说：it’s easy just cover me when i go out. 说完了就喊了一声cover me! 然后跑了出去，我也不懂他是让我掩护他，没等我想清楚他就跑了。
英文怼人的句子
1. You're such a moron! 就像你连一加一等于二都不知道一样！
2. What the hell are you doing? 你到底在搞什么鬼啊，就像只无头苍蝇乱撞！
3. Shut up, you idiot! 闭上你的嘴，你个蠢货，就像个不停呱呱叫的鸭子！
4. You're a pain in the ass! 你真是个讨厌鬼，就像那怎么赶都赶不走的苍蝇！
5. Get out of my face! 从我面前消失，像那令人厌恶的臭味一样滚开！
6. You're so annoying! 你太烦人了，跟那一直嗡嗡响的蚊子有啥区别！
7. Don't be such a jerk! 别这么混球，就像个无理取闹的小孩！
8. You're a loser! 你就是个失败者，就像那扶不起的阿斗！
9. Are you crazy? 你疯了吗，像那失去理智的野兽！
10. Leave me alone! 别烦我，就像我需要远离那糟糕的噪音！
结论：这些英文怼人的句子简单直接，在需要表达不满和愤怒的时候可以派上用场，但也要注意使用场合，不要过度伤人。
表达厌恶别人的英语句子1. 讽刺别人的英语句子有哪些1. Stop complaining！别发牢骚！2. You make me sick！你真让我恶心！3. You shouldn't have done that！你真不应该那样做！4. You're a jerk！你是个废物/混球！5. Don't talk to me like that！别那样和我说话！6. Who do you think you are？你以为你是谁？7. What's your problem？你怎么回事啊？8. I hate you！我讨厌你！9. I don't want to see your face！我不愿再见到你！10. You're crazy！你疯了！11. Don't bother me. 别烦我。
12. Knock it off. 少来这一套。
13. What's the meaning of this？这是什么意思？14. How dare you！你敢！15. Cut it out. 省省吧。
16. You have a lot of nerve. 脸皮真厚。
2. 关于表达喜欢别人的英语口语句子或短语我喜欢你。
I like you.你好棒。
Your attagirl.你很可爱。
You are very lovable很高兴见到你。
Sees you very happily.你很漂亮。
You are very attractive认识你是我的荣幸。
Knew you are my being honored你真是一个好人。
You really are a good person你让我觉得你们国家的博大精深。
You let me think your country broad and profound3. 经典的骂人的英文句子有哪些已解决问题收藏转载到QQ空间美国俚语中骂人的句子..？10 [ 标签：俚语，美国俚语，骂人 ] 有那些美国俚语中经典的骂人句子？？简短一点..越经典越好。
英语小笑话,英语笑话大全（带翻译）下面是编辑整理的英语小笑话，希望能让您捧腹大笑!英语小笑话【一】1、The Fish NetCan you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?A lot of little holes tied together with strings. replied the little girl.翻译：鱼网你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗，安? 老师发问道。
把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。
小女孩回答道。
2、律师和胳膊、宝马A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW."Officer, look what they've done to my Beeeemer", he whined."You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick" retorted the officer, "You're so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off"翻译：一个律师打开他的宝马车门，突然一辆汽车驶过来把门撞飞了，警察赶到现场，律师正痛苦地抱怨毁坏了他心爱的宝马。
“警察同志，看看他们把我的车弄的”律师哀怨地说。
经典英语冷笑话下面是店铺整理的经典英语冷笑话，欢迎大家阅读!经典英语冷笑话一:1、Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home.老师：谁能回到我下一个问题，谁就可以回家了。
One boy throws his bag out the window.一个小男孩把书包扔到窗外。
Teacher: who just threw that?!老师：谁刚刚把书包扔出去了?Boy: Me! I’m going home now.男孩：我!我现在要回家了。
经典英语冷笑话二：2、What dog can jump higher than a building?什么狗比大楼跳的还高?Anydog, buildings can't jump!任何一只狗，大楼又跳不起来!经典英语冷笑话三：3、What has a head, a tail, and no body?什么有头、有尾，但是没有身体?A coin!硬币。
经典英语冷笑话四：4、What has one eye but cannot see?什么有一只眼睛，却看不见?A needle.针。
经典英语冷笑话五：5、Wife: "How would you describe me?"妻子：你会怎么形容我呢?Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."丈夫：ABCDEFGHIJK.Wife: "What does that mean?"妻子：那是什么意思?Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable,gorgeous, and hot."丈夫：迷人的、魅力的、可爱的、令人愉悦的、优雅的、时髦的、漂亮的和火辣的。
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"妻子：哇，谢谢，但是“IJK”是什么意思呢?Husband: "I'm just kidding!"丈夫：开个玩笑!经典英语冷笑话六：The newlyweds entered the elevator of their Miami Beach hotel.一对新婚夫妇走进位于迈阿密海滩旅馆的电梯。
闹笑话、得罪人的十个英文句子
我们讲英文犯错难免，有时就算是说自己的母语中文，也未必就一定全对。
但语法上小错其实不打紧，真正会带来麻烦、失去商机的往往是不礼貌、让人会错意、闹笑话的说法。
我们帮读者整理会引起误解的英文，其中很多案例，你看了会大喊“哎呀，我真的会这样讲！”因为这真的exactly来自真实的例子，办公室里、教室里的实际对话和经验。
1、Don't forget to carry your thing.
（请不要忘记你的私人物品。
）
如果原句被老外听见会闹笑话喔，"your thing" 经常是老外指某些器官而不明言时用语...
应该这样说才对：Don't forget (about) your personal belongings.
2、Can I see your proposal?
（我可以看你的案子吗？）
Can是指一种能力，这样问等于是在问：我眼睛看不看得见你的报告。
别人会想，我怎么知道你眼睛看不看得见？
应该这样说才对：May I see your proposal?
3、I will call your telephone.
（我打你的电话。
）
Call your telephone是打给你的「电话」，不合理。
应该这样说才对：I will call your number./I will call you.
4、I cooked my grandma.
（我做饭给祖母吃。
）
cooked my grandma变成把祖母煮来吃。
应该这样说才对：I cooked for my grandma.
5、How do you feel about me?
（你觉得我表现得怎么样？）
原句会让人以为你对他有意思。
应该这样说才对：How do you think I did?
6、I will remember you forever.
（我会永远记住你。
）
不必夸张，中肯一点可信度会更高。
没有人能活到forever。
应该这样说才对：I'll always remember you.
7、Give you.
（给你。
）
我们把东西递给人时，中文有时会说「给你」或「拿去吧」，相当于英文里的Here you are.。
不要直翻成take it或give you。
8、I'm boring.
（我觉得很无聊。
）
这句话会变成我这个人很无聊。
应该这样说才对：I'm bored.
9、What is your meaning?
（你的意思为何？）
这句话会变成「你的人生有何意义」，似乎对方没有存在的必要，不礼貌。
应该这样说才对：What do you mean?
10、You go first.
（您先请）
中文说您先请，但在英文里好像命令人叫他先走，礼貌一点的说法是，我会走在你后面"After you."。
