英语幽默小故事(共8篇)
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英语幽默小故事带翻译故事对人们来说,有着天然的吸引力。
人们创作故事时,就期待着读者能够与之产生共鸣,得到愉悦的体验、得到情绪的释放。
店铺整理了英语幽默小故事带翻译,欢迎阅读!英语幽默小故事带翻译篇一做好事On a street near my workplace,I noticed a meter maid happily writing tickets for a whole line of cars parked at expired meters. As she deposited $10 tickets on one windshield after another,I felt called to do a good deed. I deposited a quarter in the last meter in the row,thus saving a fellow driver the price of a ticket.一次,在我工作地点附近的一条街上,我看到一个检查路旁计时器的小姐高兴地给一排汽车逐辆地开着超时罚款单。
当她一张接一张地往汽车雨刷下的玻璃上塞罚单时,我觉得这时该我做点好事了。
于是,我往这一排最后一台自动计时器里扔了25美分。
这样,这辆汽车的司机就可以省下罚款钱了。
Feeling rather pleased with myself,I headed for my office.I couldn't resist turning back in hopes of seeing the meter maid's reaction when she saw that the red flag was no longer showing on that meter. When she reached the last car in the line,she reached into her purse,pulled out her keys,got into the car I had "rescued"and drove away.我为自己的行为感到特别高兴,开始往工作的地点走,一边走一边禁不住地想回头看。
幽默英语小故事幽默简单英语小故事搞笑阅读幽默简单英语小故事搞笑阅读幽默简单英语小故事篇 1 “Gerald,“ asked the teacher, "what is the shape of the earth" “Gerald,”老师问道,“地球的形状是什么样的” "It"s round," answered Gerald. “是圆的”,Gerald答道。
"How do you know it"s round" continued the teacher. “你怎么知道它是圆的呢”老师继续追问。
"All right, it"s square then," he replied, "I really don"t feel like getting into an argument about it!" “好吧,那就是方的,”他答道,“我真不想为此和您争论!” 幽默简单英语小故事篇2 There was a farmer who fell and broke his hip while he was plowing, and his horse immediately galloped five miles to the nearest town and returned, carrying a doctor on his back. 有一个农夫在耕地的时候从马背上摔下来,摔坏了他的臀部,于是他的马立刻疾奔了五里路,驼回了一名医生。
"That"s a pretty smart horse," the farmer"s friend later observed. “真是一匹聪明的马,”后来农夫的朋友评论道。
"Well, he"s not really so smart," the farmer said. "The doctor he brought back was a veterinarian!" “哦,他其实并没有这么聪明,”农夫说。
1、Good use of cry 哭的妙用The parents with their three-year-old son went to see film.When they walked into the cinema, the attendant said to them,“you’ll have to go out if your son cries. But we’ll refundyou the tickets.” About half an hour later, the husbandasked his wife, “What do you think of the film?”“I’ve never seen such a boring film.” His wife answered.“It’s not worth seeing.”“I don’t think much of it, either.” The husband said.“Wake the child up and let him cry.”一对夫妇带着他们3岁的儿子去看电影。
进电影院时,服务员对他们说:“如果你们的儿子哭了,你们就得出去。
不过我们会给你们退票的。
”大约半个小时以后,丈夫对妻子说:“你觉得这电影怎么样?”“我从没看过这么没劲的电影。
”妻子回答说,“真不值得看。
”“我也不喜欢看。
”丈夫说:“叫醒孩子,让他哭。
”2、What a Smart Wife家有笨妻A newly married woman was sitting on a chair,looking vexed, when her husband came home."What's up? Why do you look so troubled?"the husband asked. The woman replied,"I'm so sorry. I was ironing your new suit andburned a hole in your trousers." And the man said,"That's all right. I have another pair that is exactly the same.""Thank God you do. I used it to mend this pair,"the wife responded.有一个刚结婚的太太,坐在椅子那边,看起来很懊恼,她先生回家看到她这个样子,就问:‘嗨,你怎么啦?为什么看起来这么懊恼呢?’太太说:‘很抱歉,你那件新做的西装裤被我烫坏了,烫成一个洞了。
英语幽默小故事英语幽默小故事(Humorous English Stories)英语幽默小故事是指那些融入了幽默元素的,令人发笑的、趣味横生的故事。
这些故事往往可以轻松地让人们放松心情,以轻鬆愉快的方式学习英语,增强学习兴趣,提高英语水平。
以下是一些英语幽默小故事,欢迎各位读者阅读。
故事一:The Blind Man and the Fish一条盲鱼夹在一群鱼中间游,在它身旁的一位失明男子问:“鱼啊,你好吗?”“我很好,谢谢您,”鱼回答道:“你想知道其他鱼怎么样吗?”故事二:The Clever Chef旅馆的厨师在晚饭时,上了一盘煮熟的翅膀,但是所有的客人都觉得味道不对。
客人们投诉后,厨师想要一试,品尝后失声惊叫,原来厨师把旅馆老板的卡特车修理的机油加到翅膀里面煮,虽然味道奇特,但确实是高效率的“润滑油”。
故事三:The Secret to Happiness一个医生告诉一个病人,如果他想保持健康和幸福,就应该每天早晨起床时,抱住自己,唱一首赞美之歌,“我就是我,我很棒!”病人试着练习后,很快恢复了健康,找到了幸福。
故事四:The Wise Monkey一个猴子在树上看着一个两个人争吵,最终分不清谁对谁错。
于是这只猴子提议:“为什么不让我来当调解人呢?我将一半的苹果给你,另一半给你,以此来解决这个问题。
”一个人高兴地把自己那半苹果递给了猴子,而另一个人也高兴地接下了自己的那半苹果。
于是猴子便坐下来自己吃了整个苹果。
故事五:The Onions有个瞎眼老人走进了一家餐馆,要了一碗洋葱汤,一口一口地喝着,接下来餐馆里的每个人都一个一个传染性地开了哭泣。
老人停下来,问:“这是怎么回事?”餐馆老板笑着回答:“你切的洋葱让大家哭了出来。
”以上是一些英语幽默小故事,希望这些故事为大家带来欢乐和帮助。
通过这些小故事,人们可以轻松愉快地掌握和学习英语,从而更快地提高英语水平。
简单幽默英语小笑话(细选3篇)简单幽默英语小笑话1There once was a young couple who lived in a town filled with crime. After three neighbors' houses had been robbed, the couple decided to get a guard dog.So one day the wife went to the pet store and said, “I need a good guard dog.”And the clerk replied, “Sorry, we're all sold out. All we have left is this little Scottie dog. But he knows karate.”The wife didn't believe him so he said to the dog, "Karate that chair.”The dog went up to the chair and broke it into pieces, then he said to the dog, “Karate that table.” The dog went up to the table and broke it in half.So the wife bought the dog and took it home to her husband who was expecting a big guard dog. But then she told her husband that it knew karate, and he said “Karate my ass!”简单幽默英语小笑话2Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on stretchers next to each other, outside the operating room. The first kid leans over and asks, "What are you in here for?"The second kid says, "I'm in here to get my tonsils out and I'm a little nervous."The first kid says, "You've got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots of Jell-O and ice cream. It's a breeze!"The second kid then asks, "What are you here for?"The first kid says, "A circumcision."And the second kid says, "Whoa! I had that done when I was born. I couldn't walk for a year!"简单幽默英语小笑话3Bifocals Barbie. Comes with her own set of blended-lens fashion frames in six wild colors (half-frames too!), neck chain and large-print editions of Vogue and Martha Stewart Living.Hot Flash Barbie. Press Barbie's bellybutton and watch her face turn beet red while tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead. Comes with hand-held fan and tiny tissues.Facial Hair Barbie. As Barbie's hormone levels shift, see her whiskers grow. Available with teensy tweezers and magnifying mirror.Flabby Arms Barbie. Hide Barbie's droopy triceps with thesenew, roomier-sleeved gowns. Good news on the tummy front, too-muumuus with tummy-support panels are included.Bunion Barbie. Years of disco dancing in stiletto heels have definitely taken their toll on Barbie's dainty arched feet. Soothe her sores with the pumice stone and plasters, then slip on soft terry mules.No-More-Wrinkles Barbie. Erase those pesky crow's-feet and lip lines with a tube of Skin Sparkle-Spackle, from Barbie's own line of exclusive age-blasting cosmetics.Soccer Mom Barbie. All that experience as a cheer-leader is really paying off as Barbie dusts off her old high school megaphone to root for Babs and Ken, Jr. Comes with minivan in robin-egg blue or white, and cooler filled with doughnut holes and fruit punch.Mid-life Cr Barbie. It's time to ditch Ken. Barbie needs a change, and Alonzo (her personal trainer)is just what the doctor ordered, along with Prozac. They're hopping in her new red Miata and heading for the Napa Valley to open a B别睡在庙里,因为跑得了和尚跑不了庙!初恋防震最佳,因为爱情像雨像雾又像风。
英语搞笑小短文带翻译英语幽默小故事100字英语搞笑小短文带翻译英语搞笑小短文带翻译英语搞笑小短文带翻译篇一Two social workers were walking through a rough part of the city in the evening. 有两名社会工作者在晚上的时候走过市区的简陋地方。
They heard moans and muted cries for help from a back lane.Upon investigation, 他们听到从后巷传来的求救呻吟声和很小的哭喊声。
经调查,they found a semiconscious man in a pool of blood. 他们发现有一个意识不清的人躺在血泊之中。
“Help me,I“ve been mugged and viciously beaten ." he pleaded. 他在恳求说:“救救我吧,我被人行凶抢劫,还遭到恶意痛打一顿。
” The two social workers turned and walked away . 这两名社会工作者转身离去。
One remarked to her colleague: " You know the person that did this really needs help." 其中一位向她的同事说:“你知道吧,做这件事的人才是真正需要协助呀。
” 英语搞笑小短文带翻译篇二 A man has a heart attack and is brought to the hospital ER. 有一名男子患有心脏病,被送往医院急诊室。
The doctor tells him that he will not live unless he has a heart transplant right away. 医生告诉他,除非他立刻接受心脏移植,否则他就活不成。
英语小故事3分钟幽默故事带翻译一些幽默的英语故事,能提高我们阅读英语的兴趣,从而提高英语的阅读能力,今天店铺在这里为大家分享一些幽默英语小故事3分钟,希望大家喜欢这些英语故事!3分钟幽默英语小故事篇1Golfing with cowsA man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat.一个男人摇摇晃晃地走进了急诊室,两个眼睛是青的,脖子上有明显的五指印。
Naturally the doctor asks him what happened. "Well, it was like this," said the man. "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife when she sliced her ball into a pasture of cows.医生问他发生了什么。
“额,是这样的,”这个人说。
“我和我老婆来了几局高尔夫,她把球打到一个牛群里。
”"We went to look for it and while I was rooting around, I noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end.“我们去找这个球,我四下搜索,发现一头牛的屁股后面有个白色的东西。
”"I walked over and lifted up the tail and sure enough, there was my wife's golf ball -- stuck right in the middle of the cow's butt. That's when I made my mistake."“我走过去,举起了它的尾巴想看清楚,我老婆的球就卡在牛的屁股中间。
英语幽默小故事带翻译大全在进行小学英语教学时,将英语随堂练习的各项内容有机融入英语故事中,能有效提升练习的趣味性,促进学生学习。
小编整理了英语幽默小故事带翻译,欢迎阅读!英语幽默小故事带翻译篇一Quasimodo had just died, so the rector was looking for a new hunchback to ring the great bell of Notre Dame cathedral.But the first man who applied for the job was not only a hunchback, but armless as well.钟楼怪人刚去世,因此教区的神父正在找一位驼背的人来敲巴黎圣母院的大钟。
但是第一个去应征的不仅是驼背,而且连手也没有。
'Of course, I'd like to give you the job,“ said the priest,"but how will you manage it?" "Never fear," replied the dauntless paraplegic. "Just watch;!"“当然,我愿意给你这个工作机会,”神父说道,“可是你怎么去敲钟呢?”“别怕,”勇敢的残疾者答道。
“待会看了你就知道。
”The two men went up to the bell tower and there the applicant took a run at the great bell, striking it with his face.The effect was magnificent, and the hunchback repeated his performance several times. However, he soon became dizzy and at the next run, missed the bell completely and went hurtling out of the bell tower to crash to his death in the courtyard below.两个人走上钟楼,应征者用脸撞那个大钟,响了好一阵子,效果良好。
小学生英语故事英文幽默故事:There was a guy who went into a shop to buy a parrot. There werethree parrots in the shop. One was $5,000; another one, $10,000; and the third one, $30,000. The customer asked the owner, “How come this guy is $5,000 That’s so expensive for this kindof parrot.” The owner said, “Because I have trained him and he can talk.” So the customer asked him, “How about this guy What can he do that makes him so expensive” The owner said, “Well, apart from talking, he can also do some amusing actions,lik e dancing and so on. That’s why he’s so expensive.” Then the customer said, “How about the third one What canhe do that makes him so expensive” The owner of the shopsaid, “I don’t know. Normally, I have never heard him talk, nor dance, nor whistle, nor sing, nothing at all! But the other two call him ‘The Boss.’”有个人到一间商店买鹦鹉。
英语幽默小故事汇总大全幽默(yōu mò)它是外来词,这是一个音、意两译的词,其表达恰到好处。
一些幽默的英语故事,能提高我们阅读英语的兴趣,从而提高英语的阅读能力。
下面小编给大家介绍关于英语幽默小故事,方便大家学习。
英语幽默小故事1Put Down My Shepherd DogMan walking along a road in the countryside comes across a shepherd and a huge flock ofsheep. He tells the shepherd, "I will bet you $100 against one of your sheep that I can tell you the exact number in this flock. " The shepherd thinks it over ; it's a big flock so he takes the bet. "973," says the man. The shepherd is astonished, because that is exactly right. The shepherd says, "OK, I'm a man of my word, take an animal." Man picks one up and begins to walk away .Wait, cries the shepherd, "Let me have a chance to get even . Double or nothing that I can guess your exact occupation ." Man says sure. "You are a quantitative economist for a government think tank ," says the shepherd. "Amazing!" responds the man, "You are exactly right! But tell me, how did you deduce that?"Well, says the shepherd, "put down my shepherd dog and I will tell you."放下我的牧羊犬有人在乡间小路上偶遇一位牧羊人和一大群绵羊,他对牧羊人说:“我和你打赌,如果我猜中这群羊的数目,我得你一只羊,如猜错,你得我100元。
1、Good use of cry 哭的妙用之青柳念文创作 The parents with their three-year-old son went to see film. When they walked into the cinema, the attendant said to them, “you’ll have to go out if your son cries. But we’ll refund you the tickets.” About half an hour later, the husband asked his wife, “What do you think of the film?” “I’ve never seen such a boring film.” His wife answered. “It’s not worth seeing.” “I don’t think much of it, either.” The husband said. “Wake the child up and let him cry.” 一对夫妇带着他们3岁的儿子去看电影.进电影院时,服务员对他们说:“如果你们的儿子哭了,你们就得出去.不过我们会给你们退票的.”大约半个小时以后,丈夫对妻子说:“你感觉这电影怎么样?”“我从没看过这么没劲的电影.”妻子回答说,“真不值得看.”“我也不喜欢看.”丈夫说:“唤醒孩子,让他哭.” 2、What a Smart Wife家有笨妻 A newly married woman was sitting on a chair, looking vexed, when her husband came home. "What's up? Why do you look so troubled?" the husband asked. The woman replied, "I'm so sorry. I was ironing your new suit and burned a hole in your trousers." And the man said, "That's all right. I have another pair that is exactly the same." "Thank God you do. I used it to mend this pair," the wife responded. 有一个刚成婚的太太,坐在椅子何处,看起来很烦末路,她先生回家看到她这个样子,就问:‘嗨,你怎么啦?为什么看起来这么烦末路呢?’太太说:‘很抱愧,你那件新做的西装裤被我烫坏了,烫成一个洞了.’他先生说:‘啊!阿谁不妨啦!我还有别的一件一样的裤子.’ 她说:‘是啊,还好我把那件新的拿出来补那件被我烫坏的.’ 3、Endearing terms 英语幽默故事:心爱的称呼 Bernie was invited to his friend's home for dinner. Morris, the host, preceded every request to his wife by endearing terms, calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, etc. Bernie looked at Morris and remarked, "That is really nice, that after all these years that you have been married, and you keep calling your wife those pet names." Morris hung his head and whispered," To tell the truth, I forgot her name three years ago." Bernie应邀离开他的朋友Morris家吃晚餐.在朋友家,Bernie发现,不管问他妻子什么问题,Morris总要在每句话的前面加上一些亲密的称呼,象蜜糖,我的爱人,亲爱的,甜心等等.Bernie对Morris说,“你们夫妻俩真够亲密的,成婚这么多年了,你还叫她叫得那末亲密.”Morris低下头,小声地对Bernie说,“诚恳跟你说吧,三年前我忘记妻子的真名是什么了.” 4、Are you a normal person?你是正凡人吗? During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the director ..., "What is the criterion that defines a patient to be institutionalized?" "Well..." said the director, "we fill up a bathtub, and we offer a teaspoon, a teacup, and a bucket to the patient and ask him to empty the bathtub." "Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would choose the bucket as it is larger than the spoon or the teacup." "Noooooooo!" answered the director. "A normal person would pull the plug." 观赏一所精力医院的时候一个观赏者问院长,“你们是用什么尺度来决议一个人是否应该被关进精力医院呢?”“呃……”院长说,“是这样,我们先给一个浴缸放满水,然后我们给病人一个调茶匙,一个茶杯和一个水桶去把浴缸外面的水放清.”“噢,我大白了”, 观赏者说.“一个正凡人会选择水桶, 因为水桶比茶匙,茶杯的体积大.”“错了”,“院长回答”“正凡人会把浴缸塞子拔掉”. 5、英文幽默山君来了 Two guys were walking through the jungle. All of a sudden, a tiger appears from a distance, running towards them. One of the guys takes out a pair of "Nikes" from his bag and starts to put them on. The other guy with a surprised look and exclaims, "Do you think you will run faster than the tiger with those?" His friend replies: "I don't have to out run it, I just have to run faster than you." 两个汉子正在穿过丛林,突然,一只山君出现在远处,向他们冲来. 其中的一个人从包里拿出一双“耐克”鞋,开端穿上.另外一个人诧异地看着他说,“你以为穿上这个便可以跑得过山君吗?” 他的朋友回答道:“我不必跑得过它,我只要跑得比你快就好了.” 6、Another 40 Years to live 再活40年 A middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience. Seeing God, she asked if this was it. God said, "No you have another 43 years, 2 months, and 8 days to live." Upon recovery the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face lift, lip-suction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even had someone come in and change her hair color, figuring since she had so much more time to live, she might as well make the most of it. She got out of the hospital after the last operation and while crossing the street was killed by an ambulance speeding to the hospital. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 40 Years? "God replied, "I didn't recognize you." 一名中年妇女心脏病突发被送到了医院, 在手术台上,濒临死亡之际,她看到了上帝, 于是,她问上帝是不是她的日子到头了. 上帝回答说,“还没有,你还能活43年,2个月零8天.” 身体将近康复的时候,这名密斯想到自己还要活那末多年,得好好对待自己,于是决议先不出院,而是去给自己整整容,吸吸脂,隆隆胸,然后还做了一个腹部拉皮和其它一些美容美体手术. 她甚至还请人到医院外面帮她头发给染了. 做完最后一个手术,这位密斯出院了, 但就在过马路的时候,她被一辆风驰电挚赶回医院的救护车给撞死了. 再一次,她又站到了上帝的眼前,她大惑不解地问上帝,“我记得你说我还能再活40年?” 上帝回答,“阿谁时候我没认出你来”.
英语幽默小故事10篇摘要:1.英语幽默小故事概述2.故事1:聪明的狗3.故事2:迟到的理由4.故事3:误解的笑话5.故事4:幸运的数字6.故事5:咖啡店的对决7.故事6:调皮的孙子8.故事7:语言障碍9.故事8:购物趣事10.故事9:意外的礼物11.故事10:简单的幸福12.总结:英语幽默小故事的启示正文:【英语幽默小故事概述】在这个世界上,幽默无处不在,英语幽默小故事更是让人忍俊不禁。
这里,我们为您精心准备了10篇英语幽默小故事,它们涵盖了日常生活、工作和人际交往等多个方面,不仅让您在轻松愉快的氛围中学习英语,还能领悟到人生哲理。
接下来,让我们一一领略这些故事的魅力吧!【故事1:聪明的狗】一天,一位主人带着他的狗去散步。
突然,狗发现了一个美味的骨头,于是它决定偷偷拿走。
主人发现了狗的意图,于是对它说:“如果你能用英语告诉我这个骨头的价值,我就让你拿走。
”狗想了想,用英语回答:“This bone is worth a lot.”主人听后笑了笑,把骨头给了狗。
这个故事告诉我们,学习英语是有好处的。
【故事2:迟到的理由】一个人因为迟到被同事嘲笑,他解释说:“我今天起床后发现家里的钟停了,所以我以为是早上7点。
结果,我以最快的速度赶到公司,结果还是迟到了。
”这个故事告诉我们,有时候,迟到的理由也能带来幽默。
【故事3:误解的笑话】一位外国游客在中国餐馆点了一份“狗不理包子”,结果服务员端上来一盘狗肉。
游客大怒,喊道:“我点的不是狗肉,是狗不理包子!”这个故事告诉我们,语言误解会导致笑话。
【故事4:幸运的数字】一位迷信的同事对公司里的每个人都说:“我的车牌号是168,意味着一路发,所以今天我一定会走运。
”结果,当天他出了车祸。
有人问他:“你的车牌号不是意味着一路发吗?怎么还会出车祸?”他回答:“是啊,可是我忘了,168还意味着一路傻瓜。
”【故事5:咖啡店的对决】一位顾客在咖啡店点了一杯咖啡,服务员问他:“您要加糖吗?”顾客回答:“不用,我已经够甜了。
英语幽默小故事带翻译精选幽默的英语小故事能激发学生的英语学习兴趣,让其在相对比较完整的语境中理解语言、学习语言。
店铺整理了英语幽默小故事带翻译给大家,欢迎大家阅读!英语幽默小故事带翻译篇一Deep within a forest a little turtle began to climb a tree. After hours of effort he reached the top, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground. The turtle tried again and again while a couple of birds sitting on a branch watched his sad efforts.Finally, the female bird turned to her mate."Dear," she chirped, "I think it's time to tell him he's adopted."森林的深处,一只小乌龟正在往树上爬。
几个小时后,它到达了顶端,然后跳了下去,挥舞着前腿,然后撞到了地上。
恢复好了以后,它慢慢地再次开始爬树,跳下,然后跌到地上。
小乌龟一次又一次地尝试,有两只小鸟坐在树枝上看着它这悲剧式的尝试。
终于,雌性小鸟转向她的伴侣。
“亲爱的,”她说,“我认为是时候告诉他他是领养来的了。
”英语幽默小故事带翻译篇二A nursery school teacher was delivering a school bus full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing what the dog's duties might be."They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster."No," said another, "he's just for good luck."A third child concluded. "No silly, they use the dogs to find the fire hydrant!"有一天,一位护理学校的老师老师正驾驶着坐满孩子的校车,送他们回家,这时候,一辆消防车呼啸而过。
简单的英语幽默小故事篇一英文作文:Once upon a time, in a small town, there was a boy named Timmy who had a knack for misunderstanding things. One day, his teacher, Mrs. Brown, announced a spelling bee competition. She said, "The winner will receive a special prize: a golden pencil!" Timmy's eyes lit up. He imagined a pencil made entirely of gold, sparkling and heavy in his hand. Determined to win, he studied day and night, spelling words like "onomatopoeia" and "supercalifragilisticexpialidocious" until he could recite them in his sleep.The day of the competition arrived, and Timmy was ready. He breezed through the rounds, spelling words with ease. Finally, it was down to him and another student. The final word was "antidisestablishmentarianism." Timmy took a deep breath, spelled it perfectly, and won the competition. Mrs. Brown handed him the golden pencil, and Timmy's heart sank. It wasn't a solid gold pencil; it was just a regular pencil painted gold. Disappointed, he muttered, "I thought it was real gold!" Mrs. Brown chuckled and said, "Timmy, it's the effort and knowledge that are golden, not the pencil." Timmy smiled, realizing the true value of his hard work.中文翻译:从前,在一个小镇上,有个叫蒂米的男孩,他总是误解事情。
英语幽默小故事〔共8篇〕篇1:英语幽默小故事 Don't Pick Up the Money on the GroundAn economist professor and a student are walking down the street when they see a $20 bill lying on the sidewalk in front of them. The student goes to pick up the money but his professor stops him and tells him not to bother.Why not?If it were a real twenty-dollar bill, someone would have picked it up already.Everything that can be invented has been invented.别捡地上的钱一位经济学教授和一名学生正在大街上行走,这时他们看到前面的人行道上躺着一张20美元面值的钞票。
学生走过去准备捡,教授制止了他,告诉他别自寻烦恼。
“为什么不捡?”“假设那是一张真20美元钞票的话,早就有人捡走了。
”“该创造的都已经被创造出来了。
”篇2:英语幽默小故事 The Less You Know, the More Money You MakeTheorem: Engineers and scientists will never make as much money as business executives.Now a rigorous mathematical proof that explains why this is true:Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.Postulate 2: Time is Money.As every engineer knows, Power=Work/Time. Since Knowledge=Power, and Time=Money, we haveKnowledge=Work/Money. Solving for Money, we get: Money=Work/Knowledge.Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity regardless of the Work done.Conclusion: The less you know, the more money you make.知识越少挣钱越多定理:工程师和科学家永远应当比经济专家挣钱少。
下面是对该定理的一个严格的数学证明:假设一:知识就是力量(Power)。
假设二:时间就是金钱。
每个工程师都知道:功率(Power)= 。
既然知识=力量,时间=金钱,我们有:知识= 。
求解金钱表达式,我们得到:金钱= 。
因此,当知识趋于零时,无论你做了多少功,金钱趋于无穷大。
结论:知识越少,你挣得的金钱就越多。
篇3:英语幽默小故事 They Should Be Playing at NightA therapist, a priest and an economist go golfing. The group ahead of them is extremely slow, leadingto some frustration among the three. Their plaints are overheard, and a man from the group ahead walks over to them. He introduces himself as an aide because the group of golfers he is with is blind! The aide thanks the three in appreciation for their patience for the blind golfers. The priest goes, “Oh no, all my life I've preached for all to be better to my fellow man and here I am plaining about theblind!” The therapist says, “I've been trained my whole life to help others and here I am plaining aboutthe blind, shame on me!” The economist says, “Oh no! They should be playing at night.”他们本该在晚上打球神父、心理学家和经济学家三人结伴打高尔夫。
前面的一组打球进度极其缓慢,这让三人大为恼火。
他们开场抱怨,前面那组中的一人听到抱怨声后朝他们走了过来。
他自我介绍说是前面那组球手们的助手,因为那组球手都是盲人。
助手感谢他们三位耐心等待。
神父听后忙说:“哦,不会吧?我一辈子都在祈祷同胞们过上更美妙的生活,而我却在这里抱怨这些盲人!”心理学家也赶紧说:“我一生的信条是帮助别人,可是我却在这里抱怨这些盲人,我真惭愧!”这时只听经济学家说:“哦,别这样!他们本该在晚上打球的。
”篇4:英语幽默小故事 A fellow pilot flying over the Midwest heard an air-traffic controller trying to contact an airliner for normal frequencychange.“Flight 354,“said the controller,“contact Kansas City Center on frequency 135.5.“The request was repeated several times with no reply from the pilot.Finally,in exasperation the controller raised his voice.”Flight 354,Simon says contact Kansas CityCenter on frequency 135.5.”The call was acknowledged with an emharrassed reply and prompt pliance.一名飞行员在中西部上空听到地面指挥塔的指挥员在呼叫一民航调整其正常接收频率。
“354航班,”指挥塔在呼叫,“请与堪萨斯市中心135.5频率联络。
”这一指令重复了几次之后,竟没得到任何回音。
最后,指挥塔的指挥员显然是被激怒了,他大声地锐:”354航班,西蒙说速与135. 5预率联络。
”这一声显然奏效,只听对方慌忙地做了答复并迅速服从了指挥。
”篇5:英语幽默小故事 Even My Driver Can Answerthat QuestionA famous game theorist, having won the Clark prize, was set to give a series of lectures at prestigious universities throughout the northeast. For the task,he hired a car and driver to take him from place to place . With nothing else to do, the driver would sitin on the highly technical lectures. After several lectures, the driver mented to the economist, “You know, I've heard your lecture so much that I think I could deliver it myself.” The economist found thisidea intriguing and decided to switch places with him at his next lecture.The driver gave the talk flawlessly. However, after the lecture, some one in the audience asked him a rather technical question that the driver had no idea how to even begin to answer. The driver considered it for a moment, and then replied, “That question is so easy, even my driver can answer it.”甚至我的司机都能答复那个问题一位著名的博弈论专家一获得克拉克奖便开场在东北部各个知名大学展开一系列讲座。
为了完成这项任务,他租了一辆车并雇了一名司机载着他到处赶场。
没有别的事可做的司机就坐在课堂里听专家那科技含量颇高的讲座。
几场讲座下来,司机对这位经济学家说:“我听了这么屡次你的讲座,我觉得我自己也能讲了。
”经济学家觉得这个想法很有趣,于是决定下次作讲座时他们两个互换位置。
司机完美无瑕地完成了演讲。
可是当讲座完毕后,听众中有人问了他一个技术含量相当高的问题,他不知如何开口答复。
司机沉思了一会,答复道:“这个问题太简单了,连我的司机都能答复。
”“Does that mean,” asked the other, “that they make ashes of themselves?”一名妇女向她最好的朋友大谈雄性动物的特性:“丈夫们就像是森林里的火,一不注意,他们就会燃烧起来。
”“那是不是意味着,”另一个问道,“他们将自己烧成灰烬?”篇7:英语幽默小故事 A naval officer fell overboard. He was rescued by a deck hand. The officer asked how he could reward him.“The best way, sir,” said the deck hand, “is to say nothing about it. If the other fellows knew I'd pulled you out, they'd chuck me in.”一名海军军官从甲板上掉入海中。