Man and woman“What does a woman want?”, Sigmund Freud, the German psychologist, once conceded, is a great question he was unable to answer, Similar questions may have confused most of us, and seem unlikely to be decoded or simplified by progress in technology. Great differences between men and women have been discussed, suspected and studied by scientists and sociologists for thousands of years, but few of them have been answered well. To understand the opposite sex is really a hard work for us. Men and women are biologically different from each other in many ways.Men are big, strong and aggressive, while women are physically inferior, and mentally intimate. But someone argues, it is an error to label the female the weaker sex by the former biological differences, for, actually, women on the average live seven years longer than men do, according to some surveys in western countries. That’s mainly because women usually lead a healthier lifestyle, and they show more endurance and adaptability under stress. Men and women are equally smart according to all forms of I.Q. test, but significantly different form each other if you examine on how they think and act. Men always state what they want directly, and they have to guess the meanings of women’s words. It i s a great task for men to comprehend such questions properly as “Are you tired?” or “Am I too fat?” This may due to their different purpose of taking a conversation. Men consider a conversation as a tool. If it helps to solve a problem, it’s worthwhile. If it doesn’t, men prefer to keep silent. Women always views conversations as a way of sharing their emotions. They talk about what they want to tell until they feel better. For women, communication itself is the purpose.Topics men care for often appear uninteresting or too serious for women. They talk about football, finance news or refugees in Middle East, while women are much more interested in movie stars, cosmetics, fashions or a newly opened shopping centre. Besides, men usually stay away form personal problems, but women don’t. Women like to tell emotional stories, which are the topics men try to avoid. So finding common interests is essential to a successful conversation between men and women. Differences are also significant if we analyze the behavior between the two sexes. Men are independent seekers, they take “self-reliant” seriously. They always try to solve problems by themselves, and often refuse helps when they are really in trouble, for accepting helps means they are not independent enough as a man. Women show a much more cooperative spirit. They call for help whenever they want, sometimes ever when not necessary at all. Men are usually the leader in a group. They make decisions and are unlikely give up though there is little chance to success. While women often show glorious wisdom to simplify a complicated issue by their innate intuition while men are struggling to solve it. In most countries, menstill play a relatively more important role in government, corporations, universities and other “important” departments. Men occupy most “good” professions and have higher incomes. Some brilliant women have also shown their excellent capability to run multinational corporations or international organizations. In Iceland, Norway, or some South Asia countries women presidents or premiers are leading their countries successfully. Women are different from men, so it is natural women do not have to compete with men in every field.Women can do much better than men in many fields, and a lot of famine jobs are getting more and more respected and well-paid. Great differences between men and women, of course, will exist forever. What we should learn is how to bridge the gap between the two sexes. The essential thing we should do, I think, is communication.Gender Differences•According to the University of Delaware's Cooperative Extension, good communication occurs when a sender conveys a message and a receiverunderstands the message conveyed in a clear and accurate way. How individuals achieve a clear give-and-take of information seems to vary between the sexes.Women empathize more while listening to another person and tend to take insubtle cues, according to Cynthia Torppa, Ph.D., of the Ohio State ExtensionOffice. While men focus on the literal words coming from someone's mouth, a woman may pay more attention to posture, tone of voice, facial expression and mood.Torppa believes men are more task-oriented, where communication is concerned, while women focus more on intimacy. In a theoretical conversation between a man and woman, for instance, a woman may say, "I'm exhausted. Work wasnonstop and my boss is a jerk." The man, according to Torppa, responds with a solution like, "Take the day off tomorrow"; or "Tell your boss off." Problemseemingly solved, the man walks off thinking the conversation is over. Thewoman, on the other hand, reacts with anger by saying, "You never listen to me."Women often expect a man to react with empathy like other women tend to. In the above example, the woman hoped her partner would simply listen to hercomplaints and feelings, or perhaps share similar concerns.Steps to Better Communication•Learning about different communication styles between the sexes providesa foundation for making things better. Knowing men like to get straight to thepoint, for instance, a woman might craft her side of the conversation with that in mind, hopefully keeping her partner interested. Instead of creating a big buildupto the story, she makes her narrative shorter than normal, realizing she can share further details once the conversation has commenced.Understanding a woman's need to share similar experiences, a man can try harder to identify with the feelings she expresses. He must realize that while he thinks he's attempting to solve her problem, he has actually stopped listening, and sharing. In the earlier example, the man could respond to the woman's venting by answering, "I've had days like that too. I hate when I work hard and my boss doesn't appreciate my work."The woman, in the example, may specifically tell her partner how to meet her needs instead of assuming he will by instinct. She could say, "I need you to listen to my day, but not solve my problem. I just need someone to listen right now." By listening with sensitivity, and not in a problem-solving manner, his behavior makes the woman feel valued and understood.Above all else, acceptance is the first step in improving the communication. Men and women must make an effort to understand and accept the varied manner in which one another expresses ideas and feelings. Unless both parties feel a sense of security and trust, any possibility of good communication fades.WHAT HE SAYS: “I’m sorry you feel that way.”WHAT YOU HEAR: “You’re being a psycho.”WHAT HE MEANS: “I just really want this argument to be over。