英语笑话

2023英语讲小笑话,3篇（范例推荐）英语讲的小笑话1雇主和雇员Workman: “Mr. Brown, I should like to ask for a smallrise in my wages.I have just been married."Employer: "Very sorry, my dear man, but I can"t help you. For accidents which happen to our workmen outside the factory we are not responsible."工人：“布朗先生，我想请您给我加一点工资。

我刚刚结了婚。

”雇主：“非常抱歉，老兄，但是我无能为力。

对工人在厂外发生的`事故我们概不负责。

”英语讲的小笑话2第一次开出租车A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath1, and stopped centimetres from a shop window.The driver said, "Look mate, don"t ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!" The passenger apologized and said, "I didn"t realize that a little tap would scare you so much." The driver replied, "Sorry, it"s not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver. I"ve been drivinga funeral van for the last 25 years."乘客轻拍了一下出租车司机的肩膀，想问个问题。

英语小笑话6篇店铺为大家整理的一些英语小笑话，希望我们的笑话栏目能够给你的生活带来一丝欢笑。

英语小笑话一：What are the Two Words?A very nice old lady had a few words to say to her granddaughter. My dear, said the old lady, I wish you would do something for me. I wish you would promise me never to use two words. One is ‘lousy’ and the other is ‘swell’. Would you promise me that?Why, sure, Granny, said the girl. What are the two words?一个非常和蔼的老夫人有几句话要对她的孙女说。

我亲爱的，老夫人说，我希望你能帮我一个忙。

我要你答应永远不要用两个词，一个是“讨厌的”，另一个是“极好的”。

你能答应我吗?噢，当然，奶奶。

女孩说：是哪两个词?英语小笑话二：奇猜异想Our physics professor was struggling to draw the class into discussion of Archimede's principle of water displacement. He told us that Archimede noticed that when he got into a pool at the public bathhouse, the water rose spilling over the edge. Excited at his discovery, he ran down the street yelling, "Eureka, eureka!" The instructor asked if anyone knew what that meant.One student stood up and answered, "I'm naked ! I'm naked!"我们的物理教授千方百计引导我们讨论阿基米德的排水原理。

竭诚为您提供优质的服务，优质的文档，谢谢阅读/双击去除英语笑话100篇【简单易懂英语笑话阅读】笑话是民族文化及社会生活中不可缺少的一环,从古至今都拥有广大的受众,深受人们喜爱。

这其中的原因,不仅在于笑话能够折射出社会生活中的方方面面,而且在于,笑话可以在说笑中蕴含着人们对于美好生活的期盼和诉求。

小编精心收集了简单易懂英语笑话，供大家欣赏学习!简单易懂英语笑话篇1Iwasoncetoldbyajapanesestudentthatthisisanoldstory.onesaturdayafternoonthegrasshopper,thesnail,andthec entipedeweresittingaroundthegrasshopper'shousedrink ingbeer.Theyranoutofbeerbeforetheywerereadytoquitdrinking,s otheydecidedoneofthemshouldgooutformorebeer.Thesnailsaid,"I'dgo,butI'mkindofslow.besides,grassh opper,thisisyourneighborhoodsoyouknowwheretogo."Thegrasshoppersaid,"Idon'tmindgoing,butmyhoppingwil lshakeupthebeerandwe'llgetsprayedeverytimeweopenone ."sotheydecidedtosendthecentipede;andthegrasshopperex plainedhowtogettothenearestliquorstore.Anhourorsopassedandstillthecentipedehadn'treturned, sothesnailandthegrasshopperdecidedtogolookforhim.Theygotasfarasthethefrontdoorandfoundthecentipedesi ttingthereputtingonhisshoes.submittedbyrodneyA.hoiseth-rothcorporation简单易懂英语笑话篇2Thisjokeneverfailstogetalaugh.Amanslowwittedmanwalkedintoapattentoffice.hewalkedu ptothepatentofficerandsaid,"hey,I'vegotanewideafora mousetrap."(Drawaboxontheblackboard.)"here'sthebox."(Drawaholeinthebox.)"here'sthehole." (Drawacircleinthebottomofthehole)"here'sthecheese." (Drawalineacrosstheholeinthebox.)"here'stheblade.Th emousestickshisheadintheholetogetthecheese,theblade dropsonhisneckandkillshim."Thepatentofficerlooksatthediagram.heunderstandsthat themanisalittleslowsohewantstobekind.heexplainstoth emanthathedoesnotthinkthedesignisreadytobepatentedy et.hetellstheman,"please,workonitsomemore.perhapsIw illbeabletopatentitanothertime."Theslowwittedmansaysthankyouandleavestheoffice.oneweeklatertheslowwittedmanshowsupagain.(Drawtheex actsameexampleontheboardinexactlythesameway.)Theslo wwittedmansays,"Thisisthebox,thisisthehole,thisisth echeeseandthisisthewire.Themousestickshisheadintheh oletogetthecheese,thewirewrapsaroundhisneckandkills him."Thepatentofficer,stilltryingtobekind,makesthesameex cuseasbefore.Theslowwittedmanleaves.oneweeklatertheslowwittedmanreturns.heapproachesthe samepattentofficerandsays,(Theexactsamethings)"here'sthebox.here'sthehole.(Thistimehedrawsazig-za glineacrosstheholeandhedoesnotdrawacircleforthechee se.)Aftercompletingthezig-zagline,theslowwittedmanp roclaims,"andhere'sthesawblade."Thepatentofficernoticesthedesignandthefactthatthatt herisnocheese.heaskstheslowwittedman,"where'stheche ese.""Ah-ha,"saystheslowwittedman."That'sthepoint.Themousestickshisheadinthehole andsays,""wheredidyouputthecheese."(whenthemousespeeksyoumustactlikethemouse.stickyour headoutasiflookingintothetrapandswingitbackandforthasiflookingforthecheese.)Theimplicationisthatthemousewillsawoffhisownheadwhi lelookingforthecheese.rememberthesawblade?submittedbyKarlhartman简单易懂英语笑话篇3AnlawyerAmericanlawyerinvitedaczechoslovakianfriend tostaywithhiminhismountaincabin.earlyinthemorning,t helawyerandhisczechoslovakianfriendwentouttopickber riesfortheirmorningbreakfast.Astheywerepickingblueb erries,alongcametwobigbears-amaleandafemale.Thelawyer,seeingthetwobears,climbedatree.hisfriendwasn'tsoluckyandthemalebearcaughthimandswa llowedhimwhole.Thelawyerdrovehiscartotownasfasthashecouldtogetapol iceman.Thepolicemantookhisgunandrantotheberrypatchw iththelawyer.sureenough,thetwobearswerestillthere."he'sinThATone !"saidthelawyer,pointingtothemale.Thepolicemanlookedatthebears,tookcarefulaimwithhisg un,andshoTTheFemALe."whatdidyoudothatfor!"shoutedthelawyer,"Isaidhewasi ntheotherbear!""exactly,"answeredthepoliceman."wouldyoubelievealaw yerwhotoldyouthattheczechwasinthemale?"(Thecheckisinthemail.)submittedbybonniep.简单易懂英语笑话篇4Amanwantedtobecomeamonksohewenttothemonasteryandtal kedtotheheadmonk.Theheadmonksaid:"youmusttakeavowofsilenceandcanonly saytwowordseverythreeyears."Themanagreedandafterthefirst3years,theheadmonkcamet ohimandsaid,"whatareyourtwowords?""Foodcold!",themanreplied.Threemoreyearswentbyandtheheadmonkcametohimandsaid" whatareyourtwowords?""robedirty!",themanexclaimed.Threemoreyearswentbyandtheheadmonkcametohimandsaid" whatareyourtwowords?""Iquit!",saidtheman."well,theheadmonkreplied,Iamnotsurprised.youhavedon enothingbutcomplaineversinceyougothere!"submittedbybonniep看了“简单易懂英语笑话”的人还看了：1.超简单的英语笑话阅读2.简单易懂的英语翻译笑话3.比较简单的英语笑话阅读4.简单易懂的英语笑话小短文5.简单易懂的英语小笑话最后，小编希望文章对您有所帮助，如果有不周到的地方请多谅解，更多相关的文章正在创作中，希望您定期关注。

短的英语笑话故事大全（精选10篇）笑话具有篇幅短小，故事情节简单而巧妙，往往出人意料，给人突然之间笑神来了的奇妙感觉的特点。

大多揭示生活中乖谬的现象，具有讽刺性和娱乐性。

其趣味有高下之分。

接下来由小编为大家整理出短的英语笑话故事大全（精选10篇），仅供参考，希望能够帮助到大家！短的英语笑话故事1Where is your beard?After many years, a young Jewish Talmud student who had left the old country for America returns to visit the family. "But--where is your beard?" asks his mother upon seeing him. "Mama," he replies, "in America, nobody wears a beard." "But at least you keep the Sabbath?" "Mama, business is business. In America, everybody works on the Sabbath." "But kosher food you still eat?" "Mama, in America, it is very difficult to keep kosher." The old lady ponders this information and then leans over and whispers in his ear, "Isaac, tell me--you’re still circumcised?"短的英语笑话故事2They Didnt Have Nikes In Those DaysA young boy had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father, who was a minister, if they could discuss his use of the car. His father said to him, "Ill make a deal with you. You bring your grades up, study the bible a little, and get your hair cut, then well talk about it."A month later the boy came back and again asked his father if he could use the car. His father said, "Son, Im really proud of you. You brought your grades up, studied the bible well, but you didnt get your hair cut!"The young man waited a moment and then replied, "You know dad, Ive been thinking about that. Samson had long hair, Moses had long hair, Noah had long hair, and even Jesus had long hair."His father replied, "Yes son, and they walked everywhere they went."短的英语笑话故事3Polly Want a WHAT?This lady approaches a priest and tells him, "Father, I have a problem. I have these two talking female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing.""What do they say?" the priest asked."They only know how to say, Hi, we are prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?""Thats terrible!" the priest exclaimed, "But I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two talking female parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots who I have taught to pray and read the Bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase and your female parrots will learn to pray and worship.""Thank you," said the lady.The next day, the lady brings her female parrots to the priests house. The priests two male parrots are holding rosary beads and praying in their cage.The lady puts her female talking parrots in with the male talking parrots and the female parrots say, "Hi, we are prostitutes! Do you want to have some fun?"One male parrot looks over to the other male parrot and screams, "Frank! Put the Bibles away--our prayers have been answered!"短的英语笑话故事4Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to Chinafromher visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerk checked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old lady out of patience.At last she could not hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They are real US dollars. They are directlyfromAmerica."短的英语笑话故事5Midway TacticsThree competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall. Observers waited for mayhem to ensue.The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Sale!" and "Super Bargains!"The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices Slashed!" and "Fantastic Discounts!"The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, "ENTRANCE".短的'英语笑话故事6Five Months OlderThe Second World War had begun, and John wanted to join the army, but he was only 16 years old, and boys were allowed to join only if they were over 18. So when the army doctor examined him, he said that he was 18.But John‘s brother had joined the army a few days before, and the same doctor had examined him too. This doctor remembered the older boy‘s family name, so when he saw John‘s p apers, he was surprised."How old are you?" he said."Eighteen, sir," said John."But your brother was eighteen, too," said the doctor. "Are you twins?""Oh, no, sir," said John, and his face went red. "My brother is five months older than I am."短的英语笑话故事7West PointMy father, brother and I visited West Point to see a football game between Army and Boston College. Taking a stroll before kickoff, we met many cadets in neatly pressed uniforms. Several visting fans asked the recruits if they would pose for photographs, "to show our son what to expect if he should attend West Point."One middle-aged couple approached a very attractive female cadet and asked her to pose for a picture. They explained, "We want to show our son what he missed by not coming to West Point."短的英语笑话故事8Be Careful What You Wish ForA couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand.Next, it was the husband‘s turn. He paused for a moment, then sa id shyly, "Well, I‘d like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.短的英语笑话故事9Napoleon Was IllJack had gone to the university to study history, but at the end of his first year, his history professor failed him in his examinations, and he was told that he would have to leave the university. However, his father decided that he would go to see the professor to urge him to let Jack continue his studies the following year."He‘s a good boy," said Jack‘s father, "and if you let him pass this time, I‘m sure he‘ll improve a lot next year and pass the examinations at the end of it really well.""No, n o, that‘s quite impossible," replied the professor immediately. "Do you know, last month I asked him when Napoleon had died, he didn‘t know!""Please, sir, give him another chance," said Jack‘s father. "You see, I‘m afraid we don‘t take any newspaper in our house, so none of us even know that Napoleon was ill."短的英语笑话故事10He Was Only Wrong by TwoJack Hawkins was the football coach at an Amercian college, and he was always trying to find good players, but they weren‘t always smart enought to be acce pted by the college.One day the coach brought an excellent young player to the dean of the college and asked that the student be allowed to enter without an examination. "Well," the dean said after some persuasion, "I‘d better ask him a few questions first."Then he turned to the student and asked him some very easy questions, but the student didn‘t know any of the answers.At last the dean said, "Well, what‘s five times seven?"The student thought for a long time and then answered, "Thirty-six."The dean threw up his hands and looked at the coach in despair, but the coach said earnestly, "Oh, please let him in, sir! He was only wrong by two."。

英语幽默小笑话100个笑话是一种能够带给人快乐，平添生活乐趣的文凭形式，以其机智、幽默、搞笑的特点，深受人们喜爱。

英语幽默小笑话就是一种给人带来快乐的黑色幽默渐层，也是美国人的一大特色文化。

以下是100个英语幽默小笑话：1、A: What did the fish say when it hit the wall?B: Dam!2、Q: What did the policeman say to his belly?A: Freeze!3、Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs?A: Right where you left it.4、Q: What did the tie say to the hat?A: You go on a head, and I hang around.5、Q: Why did the vampire go to the orthodontist?A: He wanted to improve his bite.6、Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a wall?A: Dam!7、Q: What did the tree say to autumn?A: Leaf me alone.8、Q: What did the paper say to the pencil?A: Write on me!9、Q: What did the monster say when he swallowed a clown?A: You taste funny.10、Q: Why don scientists trust atoms?A: Because they make up everything.11、Q: How do you make a tissue dance?A: You put a little boogie in it.12、Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth?A: A gummy bear.13、Q: What did the elephant say to the birthday cake? A: Nothing, it just gave it a big hug.14、Q: Why don vampires like going to parties?A: They don like to get sucked into conversations.15、Q: What did the bee say when it hit the window?A: Oh, buzz off!16、Q: Why did the scarecrow get promoted?A: Because he was outstanding in his field.17、Q: What did the barrel say to the other barrel?A: We can stand each other!18、Q: How do you make a hoodie laugh?A: Tell it a joke hoodie-style.19、Q: What did the duck say when he bought lipstick? A: Put it on my bill.20、Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth?A: A gummy bear.21、Q: why don astronauts play cards in space?A: Because they float away!22、Q: How do you make an octopus laugh?A: With ten-tickles.23、Q: What did the sheep say to the shepherd?A: Nothing, it just baa-ed.24、Q: What did the judge say when the skunk walked into the courtroom?A: Odor in the court!25、Q: What did the calculator say to the math book?A: You can count on me!26、Q: What did the helium balloon say to the air?A: Nothing, it just let out a little squeak.27、Q: What did the computer say when it crashed?A: Hey, I having a bad day!28、Q: What did the 0 say to the 8?A: Nice belt!29、Q: What did the paperclip say to the magnet?A: I find you very attractive.30、Q: What did the silverware say to the plate?A: You complete me!31、Q: What did the pirate say when he turned 80?A: Aye matey!32、Q: What did the light bulb say to the switch?A: You turn me on!33、Q: What did the big chimney say to the small chimney? A: You too young to smoke!34、Q: What did the clock say to the other clock?A: Don worry, I right behind you.35、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: I here to pollenate!36、Q: What did the teacher say to the pencil?A: You looking sharp!37、Q: What did the hamburger say to the hotdog?A: We make a great pair!38、Q: What did the rain say to the dirt?A: Let go make some mud pies!39、Q: What did the calculator say to the math book?A: You can count on me!40、Q: What did the fish say when it hit the wall?A: Dam!41、Q: What did the elephant say to the birthday cake? A: Nothing, it just gave it a big hug!42、Q: What did the cowboy say when he lost his horse? A: Howdy, saddle-less!43、Q: What did the alien say to the dad?A: Take me to your leader!44、Q: What did the hurricane say to the palm tree?A: Hold on to your leaves!45、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: I here to pollenate!46、Q: What did the carrot say to the rabbit?A: Let go for a hop!47、Q: What did the teacher say to the pencil?A: You looking sharp!48、Q: What did the rock say to the cliff?A: Hang in there!49、Q: What did the letter say to the envelope?A: Let stick together!50、Q: What did the mama bee say to her lazy bee?A: Wake up and Bee productive!51、Q: What did the cowboy say when he lost his horse? A: Howdy, saddle-less!52、Q: What did the egg say to the frying pan?A: You crack me up!53、Q: What did the key say to the lock?A: It so nice to see you again!54、Q: What did the snail say to the turtle?A: Hurry up!55、Q: What did the cowboy say to the cactus?A: How it hanging?56、Q: What did the doctor say to the patient?A: Take two aspirin and call me in the morning.57、Q: What did the bicycle say to the car?A: You may be faster, but I more fun!58、Q: What did the two antennas say to each other? A: You look good, girl!59、Q: What did the octopus say to the philosopher? A: I think, therefore I am eight!60、Q: What did the big hand say to the little hand? A: Let get to work!61、Q: What did the tomato say to the other tomato? A: You looking a little red today.62、Q: What did the duck say to the waiter?A: Put it on my bill.63、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: I here to pollenate!A: Bee yourself!65、Q: What did the bird say to the worm?A: Worm your way out!66、Q: What did the fish say to the whale?A: You a big fish in a small pond.67、Q: What did the paper say to the pencil?A: Write on me!68、Q: What did the teapot say to the cup?A: Time for a cup of tea!69、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Buzz off!70、Q: What did the noodle say to the other noodle? A: Let have a pasta party!71、Q: What did the alarm clock say to the bed?A: Time to wake up!72、Q: What did the tree say to the wind?A: Leaf me alone!73、Q: What did the tree say to the other tree?A: What a re-leaf!74、Q: What did the fish say when it hit the wall? A: Dam!A: You looking sharp!76、Q: What did the calculator say to the math book?A: Let work it out!77、Q: What did the bird say to the worm?A: Wanna come out and play?78、Q: What did the elephant say to the mouse?A: You so tiny!79、Q: What did the bee say to the other bee?A: Let make honey!80、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Smell me!81、Q: What did the frog say to the fly?A: Time for dinner!82、Q: What did the pizza say to the oven?A: Let get cooking!83、Q: What did the fish say when it saw a boat?A: That a big hook!84、Q: What did the elephant say when he saw the mouse? A: That tiny!85、Q: What did the skeleton say to the other skeleton? A: We have a lot in common!86、Q: What did the ball say to the other ball?A: Let play catch!87、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Bee mine!88、Q: What did the ice cream cone say to the other ice cream cone?A: Let have a scoop!89、Q: What did the tree say to the axe?A: Chop chop!90、Q: What did the pencil say to the eraser?A: Let work it out!91、Q: What did the horse say when it tripped?A: Neigh!92、Q: What did the scarecrow say when it got promoted? A: I outstanding in my field!93、Q: What did the pelican say to the other pelican? A: Let go for a dive!94、Q: What did the bee say to the other bee?A: Hey, bee-friend!95、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Let make honey!96、Q: What did the lightbulb say to the switch?A: You turn me on!97、Q: What did the firefly say to the other firefly? A: Let light up the night!98、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Smell me!99、Q: What did the spider say to the fly?A: You in my web now!100、Q: What did the bee say to the beekeeper?A: Let me out of this hive!从上述100个英语幽默小笑话可以看出，英语幽默小笑话涵盖了生活中的各种场景，不论是小动物、植物、机械还是自然现象，都能以机智、幽默、搞笑的方式进行描述。

英语小笑话带翻译英语小笑话带翻译（精选12篇）笑话具有篇幅短小，故事情节简单而巧妙，往往出人意料，给人突然之间笑神来了的奇妙感觉的特点。

下面是店铺为大家整理的关于英语的小笑话带翻译，欢迎大家的阅读。

英语小笑话带翻译篇1He is really somebody-- My uncle has 1000 men under him.-- He is really somebody. What does he do?-- A maintenance man in a cemetery.他真是一个大人物-- 我叔叔下面有1000个人。

-- 他真是一个大人物。

干什么的？-- 墓地守墓人。

英语小笑话带翻译篇2Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to China from her visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerk checked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old lady out of patience.At last she could not hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They are real US dollars. They are directly from America."一位中国老妇人在美国看望女儿回来不久，到一家市银行存女儿送给她的美元。

在银行柜台，银行职员认真检查了每一张钞票，看是否有假。

短篇精选英语爆笑笑话100篇1、"There was a blonde that was so sick of blonde jokes she died her hair re d.The jokes stopped and she felt so good,she took a ride in the country one Saturday afternoon.While on this ride,she noticed a flock of sheep and stopped the car to take&n......"2、"There is this guy and this girl and they want to have sex.So they go to the girls house and before entering the girl stops the guy and says.""My l ittle sister sleeps on the bottom bunk of our bunk bed and I do not want her to know what we are doing,so when I say`baloney`it means push h arder,and when I say`pastrami`it means push slower.""......"3、1．What the fuck is going on?（到底他妈的怎么回事?）通常此话出于黑人之口，且口气最宜为疑惑，不解，愤怒等等。

若是白人则多数时候会说-What the hell is going on?意义相同而适用于更多场合。

说此话之人身份通常为上级，且相处较久。

不过如果你出差回家时看见老婆身边躺着个赤条条的陌生人，那它可就派上大用场了！2．You son of bitch!（你个狗娘养的！）令人意外的是，最爱说这句话的往往是女性。

英语简短笑话大全爆笑 The old man wanted to plant some potatoes in his garden but he didn't know anyone whowould help him plow up the garden.He wrote to his son about it, and received this reply, ForHEAVENS SAKE, don't dig up that garden, that's where I buried the GUNS!老人想在花园里种些土豆，但不知道谁可以帮忙把泥土翻松。 他写信想儿子提及此事，儿子回信说道：“看在上帝的面上，千万不要翻松花园的泥土，我把枪埋在那儿了。 At 4 AM the next morning, a dozen British soldiers showed up and dug up the entire garden,but didn't find any guns.Confused, the man wrote to his son telling him what happened andasking him what to do next.His son's reply was: Just plant your potatoes.第二天凌晨4点，一队英国士兵出现在老人家中，在花园把土地翻遍，但并没有找到任何枪支。 老人写信告诉儿子这件奇怪的事情，问到底发生了什么事情，下一步应该怎么做。 儿子回信道：“你只管种土豆好了。 简短爆笑英语笑话篇二At 2 a. m. Mrs. Culkin was convinced that she had heard a prowler in the living-room. Tiptoedown-stairs, she told her husband, "Don' t turn on the lights. Sneak up him before he knowswhat's happening."Dutifully Mr. Culkin put on his robe. Just as he reached the bedroom door,his wife added, "And when you come back, bring me a glass of milk."半夜两点，科尔肯太太确信听到客厅有贼，便对丈夫说：“别开灯，蹑手蹑脚下楼，别让贼发觉，悄悄靠近他。 科尔肯先生披上外套，责无旁贷地去捉贼。 刚走到卧室门口，他妻子又补充说：“回来时给我捎杯牛奶。

英语经典笑话12篇下面是店铺整理的英语经典笑话，欢迎大家阅读!英语经典笑话：Cry"Tom, what's the matter with your brother?" asked the mother in the kitchen. "He's crying.""Oh, nothing, Mum," replied Tom. "I'm eating my cake. He is crying because I won't give him any.""But has he finished his own cake?""Yes." said Tom. "And he also cried when I was helping him finish that."“汤姆，你弟弟怎么了?” 妈妈在厨房里问。

“他在哭。

”“没事儿，妈妈，”汤姆答道。

“我在吃我的蛋糕。

他哭是因为我不给他吃。

”“他已经吃完自己的了么?”“是的。

”“我帮他吃完时，他也哭了。

”英语经典笑话：可怜的男人A man sat at a bar, had the saddest hangdog expression.Bartender: "What's the matter? Are you having troubles with your wife?"The man: "We had a fight, and she told me that she wasn't going to speak to me for a month."Bartender: "That should make you happy."The man: "No, the month is up today!"一个男人坐在酒吧里，伤心至极。