十个英语笑话爆笑超短

读英文的笑话

笑话1：Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The

ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent!

笑话2：Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up

everything!

笑话3：I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She

seemed surprised.

笑话4：I bought shoes from a drug dealer once. I don't know what he

laced them with, but I was tripping all day!

笑话5：I asked the librarian if she had any books on paranoia. She

whispered, "They're right behind you!"

笑话6：Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!

笑话7：Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was

outstanding in his field!

笑话8：I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.

笑话9：I saw a wino eating grapes. I told him, "You have to wait!"

笑话10：I couldn't quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but

英语笑话十则

以下是为您创作的英语笑话十则，希望能给您带来欢乐！

1、 Teacher: ＂John, if you have five apples in your hand and I take

away two, how many apples do you have left?＂

John: ＂In my hand? None, because you took them away!＂

我记得有一次在课堂上，老师讲这个笑话的时候，全班同学都哄堂大笑。那个场景真的特别有趣，大家笑得前仰后合，有的同学甚至都笑出了眼泪。就好像那一刻，所有的学习压力都被这轻松的笑话一扫而空。

2、 Teacher: ＂Why are you late, Tom?＂

Tom: ＂Because of the sign＂

Teacher: ＂What sign?＂

Tom: ＂The one that says ＇School Ahead, Go Slow'＂

这让我想起了小时候上学，我有个同学也总是找各种奇怪的理由迟到，每次老师听完都是又好气又好笑。

3、 Customer: ＂Waiter, this soup is too salty＂

Waiter: ＂Yes, sir It's really salty Maybe the salt went on vacation and

brought all its friends＂ 就像我们平时出去吃饭，如果碰到菜不好吃，大家可能就会这样互相调侃，一下子氛围就变得轻松起来。

4、 Dad: ＂Did you pass your English test?＂

Kid: ＂Yes, but I didn't fail it either＂

记得有一回，我邻居家的孩子考了个模棱两可的成绩，回家跟他爸爸这么说的时候，他爸爸那一脸无奈的表情，真是让人忍俊不禁。

5、 Patient: ＂Doctor, I have a problem I can't remember anything＂

10个顶级英语笑话

汤姆在商店里想买苹果。他对售货员说：“I want some apples, how much is a

pound?”（我想要一些苹果，一磅多少钱？）售货员回答：“Two dollars.”（两美元。）汤姆一听，特别高兴，掏出钱付了，然后拎着苹果就走。走了没多远，他突然又跑回来，着急地对售货员说：“Oh, I'm sorry. I don't need the apples. I

just wanted to know the weight of my money.”（，不好意思。我不需要苹果。我只是想知道我的钱有多重。）哈哈，汤姆是不是很糊涂！

杰克和他的朋友一起去钓鱼。钓了好久，杰克一条鱼都没钓到，他特别沮丧。这时候，他朋友钓到了一条大鱼，杰克羡慕地说：“You are so lucky! How did you

catch it?”（你太幸运！你是怎么钓到的？）他朋友笑着回答：“I talked to the

fish. I told him he was very beautiful and asked him if he would like to

come and have a chat with me.”（我和鱼聊天。我告诉它它很漂亮，还问它愿不愿意过来和我聊聊天。）杰克听了特别惊讶，说：“Really? And what did the fish

say?”（真的吗？那鱼怎么说的？）朋友哈哈大笑：“He said he would like to,

so he came closer and I caught him.”（它说它愿意，所以它就游近了，然后我就抓住它。）哈哈，这个回答是不是很搞笑！

有个小男孩养了一只猫。一天，他想考考猫。他拿着一个球对猫说：“Cat, can

you play ball with me?”（猫咪，你能和我一起玩球吗？）猫看了看球，然后慢悠悠地走到一边，躺下来开始睡觉。小男孩很奇怪，就又问：“Hey, cat! Why don't

20个英语笑话爆笑超短 小学生20词英语笑话

你太晚了youaretoolate

onabusamandiscoveredapickpocket'shandthrustintohispocket.

"sorry,"hesaidtothepickpocket,"youaretoolate.mywifediditbeforeyou."

在公共汽车上，有个人发现小偷把手伸到了他的口袋里o

"对不起,"他对小偷说道，"你太晚了，我妻子在你之前就搞过同样的事情了。”

whatisyouroffense你做了什么坏事

itwasthechristmasseasonandthejudgewasinamerrymoodasheaskedtheprisoner,“whatisyouroffense?”

圣诞佳节到来，法官心情愉悦地问犯人：“你做了什么坏事啊?”

“ididmychristmasshoppingearlythisyear,”criedtheprisoner.

“我今年圣诞节购物早了些”犯人回答。

“there'snothingwrongwiththat,”saidthejudge.howearlywereyoudoingthisshopping?”

“这么做没错啊，”法官说：“到底多早之前啊?“

“beforethestoreopened,”answeredtheprisoner.

“商店开门之前“犯人答道。

muchworse

那就更糟了

policeman:whydidn'tyoushoutforhelpwhenyouwererobbedofyourwatch?

警察：有人抢你的手表时，你为什么不呼救呢?

man:lfihadopenedmymouth,they'dhavefoundmyfourgoldteeth.thatwouldbemuchworse.