【英语学习资料】老友记字幕Word版第一季第二十集

各位我想介绍一个人给大家认识Guys, there's somebody I'd like you to meet.等等这是怎么回事Wait, wait. What is that?他叫马塞尔想和他打声招呼吗That's Marcel. Wanna say hi?不我不要No, I don't.真是太宝贵了从哪儿弄的Oh, he is precious! Where'd you get him?我朋友贝塞尔从某个实验室里救出来的My friend Bethel saved him from a lab.真残忍That is so cruel.为何有父母会将孩子取名为圣地Why? Why would a parent name their child Bethel?{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}Bethel又有圣地礼拜堂的意思这猴子的屁股上长了个罗斯Hey, that monkey's got a Ross on its ass罗斯他要和你住一起吗住在你家Ross, is he gonna live with you, like, in your apartment?对卡罗尔离开后家里冷清清的Yeah. I mean, it's been kinda quiet since Carol left, so...你为什么不找一个室友Why don't you just get a roommate?不我不要我觉得人到一定年纪后Nah, I dunno... I think you reach a certain age,还与室友同住是有点可悲having a roommate is kinda pathe-抱歉是可佩Sorry, that's, that's 'pathet',在梵语中代表很酷的生活方式which is Sanskrit for 'really cool way to live'.各位我今天将唱全新的曲目So you guys, I'm doing all new material tonight.我这里有12首新歌是关于我妈妈的自杀的I have twelve new songs about my mother's suicide, 还有一首关于雪人的歌and one about a snowman.你最好先唱雪人的那首You might wanna open with the snowman.-乔伊 -老兄- Hi, Joey. - Hey, buddy.-怎么样 -我没得到那份工作- So how'd it go? - I didn't get the job.怎么可能你去年就是圣诞老人啊How could you not get it? You were Santa last year.我不知道某个胖子和店经理上床了I don't know. Some fat guy's sleeping with the store manager. 他根本无法逗人开心这就是潜规则He's not even jolly. It's all political.那么你扮演什么So what are you gonna be?当他的助手[小精灵]I'm gonna be one of his helpers.这简直是当头一棒你明白吗It's just such a slap in the face, you know?你们几个准备怎么过新年Hey, do you guys know what you're doing for New Year's怎么了新年有什么不对劲吗Gee, what?! What is wrong with New Year's你当然没事你有保罗Nothing for you, you have Paolo.无须面对这种糟糕的节日压力You don't have to face the horrible pressures of this holiday: 在绝望中挣扎着寻找一个嘴唇desperate scramble to find anything with lips好在球掉下来时接吻just so you can have someone to kiss when the ball drops!!哦我说得太大声了Man, I'm talking loud!跟你说一下Well, for your information,保罗新年期间会在罗马Paolo is gonna be in Rome this New Year,-所以我将和各位一样可悲 -想得美- I'll be just as pathetic as you. - Yeah, you wish.我不想再成为迪克·拉克I'm sick of being a victim of{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}新年庆典主持的疲劳轰炸受害人this Dick Clark holiday.要我说今年不约会I say this year, no dates,咱们定个协议就咱六人共进晚餐we make a pact. Just the six of us- dinner.-行啊 -好- Yeah, okay. - Alright.我本来希望大家能更开心点的Y'know, I was hoping for a little more enthusiasm.-菲比该上台了 -哦好的- Phoebe, you' re on. - Oh, good.女士们先生们应大家要求Okay, hi. Ladies and gentlemen, back by popular demand,有请菲比·布菲小姐... Miss Phoebe Buffay.谢谢大家好Hi. Thanks. Hi.首先我想要唱一首I wanna start with a song对现在的我意义非凡的歌that means a lot to me this time of year. *我用煤当眼球堆了一个雪人**I made a man with eyes of coal**他有迷人的笑容**And a smile so bewitching**可我怎么能忘记**How was I supposed to know**我妈妈在厨房中自杀的情景**That my mom was dead in the kitchen?* *我妈妈的骨灰**My mother's ashes**还有她的眼睫毛**Even her eyelashes**都装在一个小黄坛子里**Are resting in a little yellow jar**在有风的时候**And sometimes when it's freezing**我有点想打喷嚏**I feel a little sneezy**而我现在**And now I...*打扰一下不好意思吵闹的男生Excuse me? Excuse me? Yeah, noisy boys.有什么事情可以和Is it something that you would like to在座的各位分享一下的吗share with the entire group?没没没有No. No, that's- that's okay拜托如果这事情都已经重要到Well, c'mon, if it's important enough非要打断我的表演了to discuss while I'm playing,那么我想也已经足够到可以和大家分享吧then I assume it's important enough for everyone else to hear. 这家伙回家时可要带上注意事项了That guy's going home with a note.没什么我只是对我的Noth- I was- I was just saying to my-大声点行吗Could you speak up please?抱歉我我只是在对我朋友说Sorry, I wa- I was just saying to my friend that我觉得你是我这一生见过的I thought you were the most beautiful woman that最漂亮的女孩I'd ever seen in my- in my life.然后他说你说你觉得And then he said that- you said you thought达丽尔·汉纳Daryl Hannah.{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}影星达丽尔·汉纳是他见过最美的女人Daryl Hannah was the most beautiful woman that he'd ever seen in his life. 我说我喜欢《美人鱼》中的她And I said yeah, I liked her in Splash, a lot,但《华尔街》就没那么喜欢了but not so much in- in Wall Street,我觉得她没什么气质I thought she had a hard quality.还有达丽尔·汉纳是流行的美And uh, while Daryl Hannah is beautiful in a conventional way,但你全身都散发着难得的古典美you are luminous with a kind of a delicate grace.然后你就开始喊叫了Then, uh, that-that-that's when you started yelling.好的咱们稍微休息一会吧Okay, we're gonna take a short break.那小伙拿回家的远不止注意事项了啊That guy's going home with more than a note.过来马塞尔坐这儿Come here, Marcel. Sit here.菲比我真不敢相信他还没有吻你Pheebs, I can't believe he hasn't kissed you yet.天哪我和保罗第六次约会时I mean God, by my sixth date with Paolo,他就为我的胸部起好名字了I mean he had already named both my breasts!我分享太多了吗Did I just share too much?一点点Just a smidge.大卫就像科学家做事一丝不苟David's, like, y'know, a scientist guy. He's very methodical. -我认为这很浪漫 -我也这么想- I think it's romantic. - Me too!你们看过《军官与绅士》这部电影吗Did you ever see An Officer and a Gentleman?他就有点像和我一起去看这部电影的男生Well, he's kinda like the guy I went to see that with.除了他更聪明也更温柔体贴Except, except he-he's smarter, and gentler, and sweeter... 我只想整天和他厮守在一起I just- I just wanna be with him all the time.日日夜夜夜夜日日Day and night, and night and day...还有特别的日子and special occasions...等一下我知道是怎么回事了Wait a minute, wait a minute, I see where this is going,你想和他一起共度新年是不是you're gonna ask him to New Year's, aren't you.你要违反约定You're gonna break the pact.-她要违反约定了 -不不不- She's gonna break the pact. - No, no, no, no, no, no.不对我可以吗No. Yeah, could I just?-可以我已约了珍妮丝 -什么- Yeah. I already asked Janice. - What?拜托咱们有协议的还是你定的C'mon, this was a pact! This was your pact!我反悔了不行吗I snapped, okay?我受不了这种压抑所以我反悔了I couldn't handle the pressure and I snapped. 可是珍妮丝Yeah, but Janice?你们分手时不是闹得特别糟糕吗That-that was like the worst breakup in history! 我没说这是个好主意I'm not saying it was a good idea,我只是说我反悔了I'm saying I snapped.抱歉我迟到了Hi. Hi, sorry I'm late.太滑稽了Too many jokes...快嘲笑乔伊must mock Joey!鞋子正点吧Nice shoes, huh?我快笑死了God, you're killing me!罗斯他又玩我的铲子Ross, he's playing with my spatulas again!没事他又不会把它们弄疼Okay, look, he's not gonna hurt them, right?你非得每次都带他来不可吗Do you always have to bring him?我不想把他一个人留在家里好吗I didn't wanna leave him alone. Alright?我们今天早上第一次吵架了We- we had our first fight this morning.我觉得可能和我昨天工作晚归有关I think it has to do with my working late.我无心中说了一些话I said some things that I didn't mean,他就朝我扔大便了and he- he threw some faeces...如果你准备加班Y'know, if you're gonna work late,我可以替你照顾他I could look in on him for you.这太好了Oh, that'd be great!但是如果你去but if you do,请装作是去找他的好吗make sure it seems like you're there to see him, okay, 而不是过去帮我忙的and you're not like doing it as a favour to me.好但他如果问起来我就得直说了Okay, but if he asks, I'm not going to lie.但是我们无法直接实践该理论But, you can't actually test this theory.因为目前的量子加速器还远无法达到because today's particle accelerators are nowhere near powerful enough 能够模仿这种状态的能量to simulate these conditions...好我有个问题Okay, alright, I have a question, then.-嗯 -你准备什么时候吻我- Yeah? - Um, were you planning on kissing me ever?这是个正当而合理的问题Uh, that's definitely a, uh, valid question.而答案是应该是And, uh, the answer would be...是的对我曾想过yes. Yes I was.但我希望这个特殊的吻能够But, see, I wanted it to be this phenomenal kiss在一个特殊的时间中发生that happened at this phenomenal moment,因为那个人是你because, well, 'cause it's you.当然Sure.好但是我等的时间越久Right. But, see, the longer I waited,这个吻就会显得越特殊the more phenomenal the kiss had to be.我们现在已经到了一个and now we've reached a place把桌上的东西都挥下去where it's just gotta be one of those things where I just like... 然后把你扔在上面的时刻sweep everything off the table and throw you down on it.而我实际上并不是那种乱挥东西的人And, uh, I'm not really a, uh, sweeping sorta fella.大卫我觉得你是那种可以挥东西的人Oh, David, I, I think you are a sweeping sorta fella.你是被困在物理学家体内的猛男I mean, you're a sweeper...trapped inside a physicist's body -真的 -没错我确定- Really? - Oh, yeah, oh, I'm sure of it.你应该现在挥东西把我丢上去吧You should just do it, just sweep and throw me.-现在吗 -对现在- Now? Now? - Yeah, right now. Just....好好好Okay. Okay. Okay.这东西很贵的You know what? This was just really expensive.这个是人家送的And I'll take- this was a gift.你现在是在收拾东西了Okay, now you're just kinda tidying.好吧管他的Okay, what the hell, what the hell.你想被我丢上去还是自己跳上去You want me to actually throw you or you-you wanna just hop?我自己跳好了I can hop.告诉我So tell me something."不约会协议"对你而言意味着什么What does the phrase 'no date pact' mean to you?对不起I'm sorry, okay.钱德勒约了人菲比也有对象It's just that Chandler has somebody, and Phoebe has somebody... 所以我约了搞笑巴比I thought I'd ask Fun Bobby.搞笑巴比你的前男友搞笑巴比Fun Bobby? Your ex-boyfriend Fun Bobby?对Yeah.你还认识其他的搞笑巴比You know more than one Fun Bobby?我恰好认识一个搞笑鲍比I happen to know a Fun Bob.-来了给 -没法加牛奶了- Okay. Here we go. - There's no room for milk.好了这下可以了There. Now there is.好吧那么在咱们不约会之夜Okay, so on our no-date evening,你们中三个已然有约three of you now have dates.-四个 -五个- Four. - Five.抱歉保罗提早搭飞机回来Sorry. Paolo's catching an earlier flight.而我在商场遇上—个火辣的单亲妈妈Yeah, and I met this really hot single mom at the store. 我这个小精灵怎能抗拒What's an elf to do?好吧那么当大球落下的时候Okay, so I'm gonna be the only one我将是唯一一个独自站在那里的standing there alone when the ball drops?我们都在啊我们会举办一个盛大的聚会Oh, c'mon We'll have, we'll have a big party,没人会知道谁是谁的and no-one'll know who's with who.你知道的我现在需要的并不是这个Hey, y'know, this is so not what I needed right now.-你怎么了 -都是马塞尔- What's the matter? - Oh, it's Marcel.他一直不让我进门He keeps shutting me out, y'know?他一直拖着手在屋里走来走去He's walking around all the time dragging his hands...真奇怪我那天晚上和他玩得很愉快That's so weird, I had such a blast with him the other night. -真的 -对啊- Really? - Yeah,我们一起玩看电视we played, we watched TV.杂耍真是太精彩了That juggling thing is amazing.什么杂耍What, uh... what juggling thing?抛袜子卷成的球啊我以为是你教他的With the balled-up socks? I figured you taught him that. 没有No.也没什么大不了的Y'know, it wasn't that big a deal.只是用袜子卷成球还有香瓜He just balled up socks... and a melon...-菲比 -麦克斯还认识大伙吗- Phoebe! Hi. - Oh, hi Max! Hey, do you know everybody? 不认识你看见大卫了吗No. Have you seen David?没有他没在这儿No, no, he hasn't been around.如果你看到他叫他赶紧收拾行李Well, if you see him, tell him to pack his bags.我们要去明斯克了We are going to Minsk.-明斯克 -明斯克在俄罗斯- Minsk? - Minsk. It's in Russia.我知道明斯克在哪儿I know where Minsk is.我们已申请到奖助金We got the grant.三年提供所有经费Three years, all expenses paid.-你们什么时候动身 -1月1日- So when do you leave? - January 1 st.你来这儿干什么What are you doing here?麦克斯告诉我明斯克的事了Um, well, Max told me about Minsk. So恭喜了这太让人激动了Congratulations! This is so exciting!如果我们真的能去的话我会更激动的It'd be even more exciting if we were going.你们不去了为什么Oh, you're not going? Oh, why?告诉她大卫 "我不打算去明斯克"Tell her, David. 'I don't wanna go to Minsk和李本斯亚马古基与法朗克共事and work with Lifson and Yamaguchi and Flench, nonononononono. 我要留下来和我女朋友在一起I wanna stay and make out with my girlfriend! "够了麦克斯谢谢Okay, thank you, Max. Thank you.你真的不去So you're really not going?我知道不知道该怎么办我只是I don't know. I don't know what I'm gonna do. I just.... 你来决定You decide.-别这样 -求你了- Oh don't do that. - Please.-我是在求你 -我不能那么做- But I'm asking you. - I can't make a decision.-只要你 -好了留下来- Just - Okay. Stay.-留下来 -留下来- Stay. - Stay.你进步神速啊Getting so good at that!都是麦克斯的东西It was Max's stuff.我喜欢这个朝鲜蓟I love this artichoke thing.别告诉我里面是什么我明天才开始节食Oh, don't tell me what's in it, the diet starts tomorrow. 你记得珍妮丝吧You remember Janice.历历在目Vividly.-嗨 -嗨我是珊蒂- Hi. - Hi, I'm Sandy.珊蒂请进Sandy, hi. Come on in.-你把孩子都带来了 -对可以吗- You brought your kids. - Yeah. That's okay, right?-聚会 -这东西不可以进来- Party! - That thing is not coming in here!东西你都这样招呼客人吗'That thing'? This is how you greet guests at a party?让我问问你Let me ask you something,如果我带着我的新女友来这里if I showed up here with my new girlfriend,你也不欢迎她进来吗she wouldn't be welcome in your home?你的新女友不会尿在我的咖啡桌上I'm guessing your new girlfriend wouldn't urinate on my coffee table. 他已经够难为情了行吗Okay. He was more embarrassed about that than anyone. Okay而他还有勇气装作And for him to have the courage to什么事情都没发生一样再来到这里walk back in here like nothing happened...好啦叫他离我远点就是了All right. All right. Just keep him away from me.谢谢来马塞尔Thank you. Come on, Marcel.咱们去寒暄一下吧whaddya say you and I do a little mingling?好吧待会儿见All right, I'll catch up with you later.天啊瑞秋亲爱的你没事吧Oh, my gosh! Rachel, honey, are you okay?保罗在哪儿Where's Paolo?罗马那个笨蛋错过了飞机Rome. Jerk missed his flight.然后呢你的脸就爆炸了吗And then your face exploded?不是No.我当时在机场准备上出租车Okay. I was at the airport getting into a cab...然后一个拿着袖珍书的金发女人when this woman- this blonde planet with a pocketbook-就开始朝我吼好像说车是她先拦下的starts yelling at me. Something about how it was her cab first. 后我记得的事情就是她开始And then the next thing I know开始拽着我的头发把我拖到了车外she just starts- starts pulling me out by my hair!于是我拿出哨子使劲吹So I'm blowing my attack whistle thingy结果又来了三辆出租车and three more cabs show up.当我想上别的车的时候她就开始打我了And as I'm going to get into a cab she tackles me结果我撞上了路沿And I hit my head on the curb哨子把嘴唇弄破了and cut my lip on my whistle.大家玩得还愉快吧Everybody having fun at the party?-有人吃我的蘸酱吗 -有的- Are people eating my dip? - Yes.我上周在商场看见你时Y'know, when I saw you at the store last week,我第一次产生了扒光小精灵衣服的念头it was probably the first time I ever mentally undressed an elf.-真淫荡 -是的- Wow, that's dirty. - Yeah.孩子们Hey, kids.看他啊Look at him.我并不是让他整晚上都陪着我I'm not saying he has to spend the whole evening with me, 但他至少过来转转啊... but at least check in.原来你在这儿There you are!差点让你跑掉You got away from me.但又被你逮到了But you found me.罗斯帮我们照一张Here, Ross, take our picture.笑一个你被照到珍妮丝的相机中了Smile. You' re on Janice Camera.杀了我吧现在就杀了我Kill me. Kill me now.各位搞笑巴比来了Hey everybody, it's Fun Bobby!抱歉我迟到了我祖父他Hey, sorry I'm late. But my grandfather, he... 他在两小时前过世了...died about two hours ago.我买不到明天之前的机票But I-I-I couldn't get a flight out 'til tomorrow, 所以我来了so here I am.搞笑巴比近来可好Hey, Fun Bobby! How's it going, man?谁死了Whoa! Who died?我们打算用开放式棺材It's gonna be an open casket, you know?所以至少我还可以再看他一眼So at least I'll get to see him again.我要把这张放大洗出来Oh, I'm gonna blow this one up,然后写上闪闪发光的"破镜重圆"and I'm gonna write 'Reunited' in glitter.好了珍妮丝够了All right, Janice, that's it!珍妮丝珍妮丝Janice. Janice.嘿珍妮丝我邀你来并不代表我们Hey, Janice, when I invited you, I didn't think it meant that we...哦不哦不Oh, no. Oh, no.抱歉让你误会了I'm sorry you misunderstood.天哪你听我说钱德勒听我说Oh my God. You listen to me, Chandler, you listen to me.这次可能是你最后一次和我在一起了One of these times is just gonna be your last chance with me.哦把那东西给我Oh, will you give me the thing?-麦克斯你好 -洋子- Hi, Max. - Yoko.{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}小野洋子造成披头士成员不合我决定自己去明斯克了I've decided to go to Minsk without you.-喔 -少了你将不太一样- Wow. - It won't be the same...但明斯克还是明斯克新年快乐... but it will still be Minsk. Happy New Year.你还好吧Are you all right?没事我没事我没事Yeah, I'm fine. I'm fine.来Come on.-你去明克斯吧 -不我不会去的- You' re going to Minsk. - No, I'm not going to Minsk.你一定要去明斯克You are so going to Minsk.你属于明斯克你不能因为我而留下来You belong in Minsk. You can't stay here just 'cause of me. 我可以的Yes I can.因为如果我去意味着我必须和你分手Because if I go it means I have to break up with you.-而我不能和你分手 -你可以你可以- And I can't break up with you. - Oh yes, yes, yes you can. 你可以说Just say,"菲比我爱你"Phoebe, I love you,但是工作是我的生命but my work is my life.我现在必须这样做"That's what I have to do right now. "然后我说 "你的工作你的工作And I say, "Your work? Your work?你怎么能这样说"How can you say that? "接着你说 "我的心如刀割Then you say, "it's tearing me apart,但我别无选择你就不能理解一下吗"I have no choice. Can't you understand that? "我说 "不不我不了解"And I say, "No! No! I can't understand that! "-疼 -对不起- Ow. - Sorry.然后你抱住我And then you put your arms around me.-然后你抱住我 -哦对不起- Then you put your arms around me. - Oh, sorry.然后你对我说你爱我永远不会忘记我And then you tell me you love me and you'll never forget me. 我永远不会忘记你I'll never forget you.你再说现在已接近午夜你必须走了Then you say that it's almost midnight and you have to go... 因为如果咱俩不能有结果...because you don't wanna start the new year with me你也不愿和我共度新年if you can't finish it.我会想你的科学家I'm gonna miss you, you scientist guy.我是迪克·拉克正在时代广场上直播Hi, this is Dick Clark, live in Times Square. 五彩纸屑如暴风雪般狂舞We're in a virtual snowstorm时代广场热闹非凡of confetti here in Times Square...一年更比一年好It gets better every....好好睡吧孩子Here you go, kids.然后孔雀就咬了我And then the peacock bit me.午夜的时候请和我接吻吧Please kiss me at midnight!看见珊蒂没You seen Sandy?我不知该如何告诉你Ooh. Uh, I don't know how to tell you this... 她正在莫妮卡房里but she's in Monica's bedroom,那个叫麦克斯的科学怪人在一起getting it on with Max.哦我知道该怎么告诉你Ooh, look at that, I did know how to tell you.-各位大球要掉了 -什么- Hey, everybody, the ball is dropping. - What?大球要掉了The ball is dropping!再过20秒钟就到午夜了In 20 seconds, it'll be midnight.这一瞬间的快乐就要靠咱们自己了And the moment of joy is upon us.看来那个不约会的协议确实生效了Looks like that no-date pact worked out.大家好像都很开心我讨厌这样Everybody looks so happy. I hate that!不是所有人都开心嘿巴比Not everybody is happy. Hey, Bobby!四三二four, three, two...一新年快乐...one! Happy New Year!你们知道吗我刚才算了一下Y'know, I uh.. just thought I'd throw this out here.虽然我不是数学高手I'm no math whiz...但是我确实意识到咱们这里有三男三女But I do believe there are three girls and three guys right here. 今晚我不想亲任何人I don't feel like kissing anyone tonight.我无法亲任何人I can't kiss anyone.那我就要每个人都亲So, I'm kissing everyone?不你不能亲罗斯他是你哥No, you can't kiss Ross. That's your brother.太好了大家都有亲亲就我没有Perfect. Perfect. So now everybody's getting kissed but me.不管谁来亲我Alright, somebody kiss me.谁来亲我已经到午夜了谁来亲我Somebody kiss me! It's midnight! Somebody kiss me!好吧好吧All right! All right!亲一个There!我真的希望这样能够奏效I wanted this to work so much.By F-loat 我是说我就在这里I mean I'm still in there,给他换尿布替他抓跳蚤Changing his diapers. Picking his fleas.但他却视为理所当然But he's just phoning it in.深爱某人却得不到回报Just so hard to accept the fact that意识到这个现实真是令人难过something you love so much doesn't love you back.我觉得那个贱人打断了我的牙齿I think that bitch cracked my tooth.。

-告诉他 -就告诉他嘛- Tell him. - Just tell him.-闭嘴 -告诉我什么- Shut up. - Tell me what你看你连正眼看他都不敢Look at you, you won't even look at him.就告诉我吧Oh, come on tell me.·下回有女人不肯看我我也好有新理由I could use another reason why women won't look at me.好吧好吧昨晚我梦见All right. All right. Last night, I had a dream that uh...我和你...that you and I were在这桌上做爱doing it on this table.}梦里干的不错嘛Excellent dream score.你怎会有这种梦Why would you dream that最重要的是More importantly......was I any good，简直是棒极了Well, you were pretty damn good.真有意思在我梦中我非常力不从心Interesting. Cause in my dreams, I'm surprisingly inadequate.昨晚你在这桌上的表现完美无缺Last night, you seemed to know your way around the table.真高兴能与你们分享I love it when we share.…你没事吧You okay there我不敢相信你会在她梦中做爱I can't believe you two had sex in her dream.抱歉仅此一次I'm sorry, it was a one-time thing.我醉得不省人事而且这不是我的潜意识I was very drunk, and it was someone else's subconscious."你好呀瑞秋Hello, Rachel.下去给我你们能想像我操作钻床的样子吗Ooh, give me. Can you see me operating a drill press 不知道你当时穿什么I don't know. What are you wearing%菲比你为何想操作钻床Phoebe, why would you want to operate a drill press只是暂时的工作Just for some short-term-work.直到我找回一部分前按摩客户You know, until I get back some of my massage clients.又是海盗吗Pirates again"不根本不贴边No. Nothing like that.我真是个大笨蛋I'm just such a dummy.我教他们"自己在家动手做按摩"I taught a "Massage Yourself at Home" workshop.结果他们就不来了And they are.~嗨钱德勒她可以为你工作Hey, Chan, she could work for you.谢了乔伊这是个好主意Thanks, Joey. That's a good idea.我可以我来吧什么工作I could. I could do it. What is it我秘书这几周无法来上班My secretary's gonna be out for a couple of weeks. |她去给一侧乳房动消乳手术She's having one of her boobs reduced.一言难尽的波霸故事It's a whole big boob story.我可以当个秘书I could be a secretary.菲比我不知你是否是这块料Phoebes, I don't know if it's your kinda thing...【因为这份工作需要你大部分时间... because it involves a lot being normal尽可能保持正常for a large portion of the day.我能办到I could do that.-你玩什么呢 -我的新传呼机-What are you playing with -It's my new beeper.%古生物学家要那玩意儿干嘛What the hell does a paleontologist need a beeper for以防恐龙紧急事件救命啊快来Is it like for dinosaur emergencies Help. come quick,他们还是绝种了They're still extinct.不是为卡罗尔生产买的No. It's for when Carol goes into labor.*好让她随时联系到我She can get me wherever I am.她只需拨号55-金宝All she has to do is dial 55-Jimbo.{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}Jimbo在美国俚语中指"不请自来的人"这号码真酷还能当孩子的名字A cool number and a possible name for the kid.-各位回头见了 -去见小伊森吗·- All right, I'll see you guys later. - Off to see young Ethan谢谢Thank you.伊森到底有多小很小吗How young is young Ethan Young年纪和我们差不多He's our age.当我们还是》When we were...-他是大学四年级学生 -大学- He's a senior in college. - College这位小朋友不在乎你的年纪吗This man-child has no problem with how old you are 当然不在乎这根本不是问题No, of course not. It's not even an issue...因为我告诉他我22岁~...because I told him I was 22.-你什么 -什么- You what - What-我不像22岁吗 -25 26还说得过去- Oh, I can't pass for 22 - Well, maybe 25, 26.-我本来就26 -那就对啦- I am 26. - There you go.-听见没 -听见了^- Can you hear that - Yeah.知道不拿起电话就不会响了You see, that'll stop when you pick up the phone. -我来了 -好的- Oh, I'm on. - Okay.宾先生办公室Mr. Bing's office.抱歉他正在开会.#No, I'm Sorry, he's in a meeting right now.我没在开会我在...I'm not in a meeting. I'm right... Whoops.他知道这件事吗Will he know what this is in reference to他有你的号码吗And he has your number好我会转告他的再见,I'll see that he gets the message. Bye-bye.罗斯打来问候的Ross says hi.真好玩好了我们现在做什么This is so fun. All right. What do we do now现在我得开始工作了Well, now I actually have to get to work."可能吧"("Most likely."好了我出去了Okay, I'm gonna be out there.好的再见All right. Bye-bye.再见Bye-bye.-什么事 -你在干嘛~- Yes - What you doing窗户擦好了蜡烛点上了Okay, windows are clean. Candles are lit.皮带太紧我得去换一条Belt's too tight. Gotta change the belt.鱼翻过没没因为我做的意大利面Did I turn the fish Nope, because I made lasagna. -我有没有失控 -有一点点[- Am I out of control - Just a touch.莫妮卡我不明白Mon, I don't understand.你跟这个男生从他期中考试后I mean, you've been dating this guy since like, what...谈到现在... his midterms.为什么突然;Why, all of a sudden, are you so...-我怎么了 -今晚会是销魂一夜吗- What - Could tonight be the night我不知道他是个好男孩I don't know. He's a great guy...我喜欢和他在一起但是很难说...and I love being with him. But, you know...只能顺其自然无法预先计划好?...things happen when they happen. You don't plan these things. -腿毛刮了没 -刮了- So, did you shave your legs - Yeah.罗斯别纠结了这只是一场梦Would you let it go, Ross It was just a dream.不代表...It doesn't mean时候到了宝宝要出世了？This is it. Oh my God! It's baby time! Baby time!放轻松冷静点别紧张All right, relax. Just relax. Be cool.对刚有人呼我Yeah, hi. I was just beeped.不安卓不在这今天呼错三次了No, Andre is not here. Third time today.对我确定~Yes, I am sure.不先生我不提供那些服务No, sir, I do not perform those kind of services.服务Services懂了服务嘛Oh, services.对你要呼的是55-劲爆、Yeah, you want 55-Jumbo.{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}jumbo是庞然大物的意思没错That's right.没错是劲爆不是金宝先生That's right. JUMBO with a "U," sir.不相信我你不会想要我的No, belive me, You don't want me.^从他的号码看来你看到我会大失所望Judging by his number, I'd be a huge disappointment.好吧再见了Alrighty, bye-bye.第一天上班如何How was the first day太棒了每个人都非常非常好Excellent. Everyone was so, so nice.·瞧认识我这种职位的人多沾光It pays to know the man who wears my shoes.说的是我Me.不我没告诉任何人我认识你No. I didn't tell anyone I knew you.-为什么 -因为你懂的- Why not - Well, because, you know.：他们并不喜欢你They don't like you.-什么 -我以为你早知道- What - I thought you knew that.-谁不喜欢我 -每个人- No, who doesn't like me - Everyone.除了Except for....?不每个人No. Everyone.-你在说什么啊 -别难过- What are you talking about - Don't feel bad.他们过去都很喜欢你They used to like you a lot.自从你升职后But then you got promoted, and, you know,~他们感觉你是上司大人物now you're like Mr. Boss Man. you know, Mr. Big.宾先生宾大老板Mr. Bing. Boss Man Bing.-真不敢相信 -他们甚至还模仿你- I can't believe it. - Yeah. They even do you.模仿我They "do" me$对比如这样You know, like, okay:报告要"何时"才能交来"Could that report be any later"-我没有那样说话 -你有的- I don't sound like that. - Yeah, you do.这山谷回荡着美妙的"The hills are alive with the sound...:"音乐"声...of music."我的烤饼 "我"的烤饼"My scone. My scone."我没那样说话这绝"不"是真的I don't sound like that. That is so not true. "不"是这样 "不"是这样That is so not... That is so not...$这闭嘴吧That Oh, shut up.-不会吧 -告诉你我到九岁时- Did not. - I'm telling you, up until I was 9...还以为"枪口"就是真实存在的犯罪现场... I thought "gunpoint" was an actual place where crimes happened.-怎么会 -新闻老是报导犯罪事件- How's that possible - Well, think about it. It's always on the news.（某人在"枪口"下"A man is being held up at Gunpoint."惊慌的观光客在"枪口"下"Tourists are terrorized at Gunpoint."我一直在想怎么还有人去那儿And I kept thinking, "Why do people continue to go there"-我该走了 -好- I should go. - Ok.}-除非 -什么- Unless. - What除非你要在这儿过夜Unless you wanna stay over.我反正要在这过夜不如I mean, I'm going to. So....是啊这样再好不过Yeah, I'd really like that.￥在我们考虑留宿的事宜之前Before we get into any staying-over stuff...我有些事情必须告诉你...there's something you should know.是"我明天一早有课"之类的Ok. Is this, like, "I have an early class tomorrow"...还是"我与山羊秘密结婚了"...or "I'm secretly married to a goat"'在这两者之间Well, it's somewhere in between.就严格技术层面而言当然我还没You see, in a strictly technical sense, of course, I'm not....我是说我还没有Well, I mean, I haven't ever....-伊森 -在- Ethan - Yeah.、你是处男吗Are you a virgin如果你们这些孩子现在这样称呼的话If that's what you kids are calling it these days, then...对我是个处男...yes, I am.我大概一直在等待适合的人I've kind of been waiting for the right person.)-真的吗 -真的- Really - Yeah.你知道我是在指你吧You do know I was talking about you, right你一直喔个不停You keep saying that.你懂的你在杂志上看过在电影里看过You know, you read about it. You see it in the movies.,甚至在家里练习过可是天啊Even when you practice it at home, man, oh, man...这感觉实在没得比...it is nothing like that.听着听着Listen, listen.你对我坦白了一件难以启齿的事You told me something that was really difficult for you.：我想如果你能坦诚相对那我也能And I figure if you can be honest, then I can too.天啊别告诉我刚才做错了Oh, God. Don't tell me I did it wrong.不那件事你做得非常完美No, no, no. Nothing wrong about that.好我说了Ok, Here goes.）我不是22岁I'm not 22.我是25岁I'm 25...零13个月...and 13 months.但是我想我们的关系不会因此变掉But I figure, you know, that shouldn't change anything.【年龄根本就不是距离对吧I mean, what the hell does it matter how old we are听着Listen...在你坦承之际...as long as we're telling stuff...我也有话要说... I have another one for you.《我比你所知的年纪还小I'm a little younger than I said.-你不是四年级生吗 -我是四年级- You're not a senior - Oh, I'm a senior...高中四年级...in high school.我们不应该这样What we did was wrong.…天啊我刚和一个God, I just had sex with不到二十岁的小屁孩做爱了someone who wasn't alive during the bicentennial.{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}bicentennial指美国独立二百周年我刚做爱了I just had sex.伊森注意听你为何不早告诉我<Ethan, focus. How could you not tell me-你也没告诉我你真实年龄 -那不一样- You never tell me how old you are. - It's different.我撒的谎不会让我们在48个州获重罪My lie didn't make one of us a felon in 48 states.{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}美国法律规定与未成年人发生关系要判重罪-你到底在想什么 -我什么都没想- What were you thinking - I wasn't thinking.—-我只是忙于 -不要说- I was too busy falling... - Don't say it.爱上你...in love with you.-真的吗 -对不起- Really - Sorry.好吧别再爱我了Well, fall out of it.-你都不该在这你该在学校过夜的You shouldn't be here. It's a school night.天啊Oh, God.我就像是那种I'm like those women that you see...专门勾引小帅哥的女人...with shiny guys named Chad.'我成了琼·柯琳斯I'm Joan Collins.{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}作风随便的英国性感女星谁Who好安卓45分钟后就会到Ok. Andre should be there in about 45 minutes.就这样再见；Alrighty. Bye-bye.这样省事多了It's just easier that way.说吧你昨晚的梦都告诉我了Come on. You told me about the last dream.不忘了吧No. Forget it.为什么难道是梦中的我对你过于粗鲁-Why not Was I doing something particularly saucy 好吧我说All right. Fine.梦中不仅仅你在场You were not the only one there.乔伊也在场Joey was there too.好的:All right.那Was there...还有其他人吗...anybody else there-没有 -你确定没有人...- No. - You sure Nobody...发发薄荷糖啥的；... handing out mints or anything没有只有我们三个No, it was just the three of us.说说看是你跟钱德勒做完So, tell me. Was it like you and Chandler,然后跟我做还是我们三个同时...and then you and me, or you, me and Chandler -你知道吗 -什么…- You know what - What有几次There were times...我都没有参与...when it wasn't even me.真甜蜜伙计们That is so sweet, you guys.莫妮卡伊森又来电话了$Mon, Ethan called again.-莫妮卡 -莫妮卡- Mon - Mon！-干嘛 -伊森又来电话了- What - Ethan called again.-你不再见他了吗 -对- You're not seeing him anymore - No.有时候有些问题无法解决#Sometimes, things don't work out.这跟他需要假条才能翘掉体育课无关吗This has nothing to do with him needing a note to get out of gym我没说什么都没说我发誓I, I didn't say any... I sw... I did not say anything. I swear.-他听到的 -听着下回见到他时- He stopped by. - Listen, next time you talk to him...能问问《恐龙战队》中最强的是谁吗)...could you ask him which one the strongest Power Ranger is{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}据日本同类型题材改编的美版恐龙战队我的生活真是太精彩了换个话题行吗Oh, my life is just so amusing. Can we drop it now对不起Sorry.{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}恐龙战队台词墨菲时间到了》"It's morphin'time."-暴龙 -剑龙- Stegosaurus. - Tyrannosaurus.我得走了I gotta go.天脑充血Head rush.再一次我真得走了^One more, and then I have to go.酷Cool.你要上哪儿去Where you going我要和几个同事去参加生日会I got a birthday party with some work people.同事吗没人跟我说"Work people Nobody told me.我知道这都是因为No, I know. That's part of the whole...他们不喜欢你所造成的...you know, them-not-liking-you extravaganza.你来说说我真不明白You know what, I don't get this.一个月前他们都是我朋友^A month ago, these people were my friends.我当上了主管并不代表我会变成另一个人You know, just I'm in charge doesn't mean I'm a different person.那你今晚该来Well, then you should come tonight.和他们多相处You know, just hang out with them.让他们知道你还是个大好人）Let them see what a great guy you still are.-你认为我该去 -真心的你该去- You think I should - I really do. Yeah.-那好 -走吧- Ok. - Ok.我们能不一起去吗But could we not go together我不想成为邀请上司的怪人.I don't wanna be the geek who invited the boss.昨晚真是太棒了I think last night was great.我和崔西合唱了首《乌木与象牙》You know, the Karaoke thing. Tracy and I doing Ebony and Ivory.你表现得很好You were great.但大家仍然取笑你…But they still made fun of you.-什么 -你现在成了"假惺惺"老板- What - You know, now you're more like, Mr. Caring Boss."套近乎"老板Mr. I'm-one-of-you Boss."称兄道弟"宾大老板Mr. I-wanna-be-your-buddy Boss Man Bing.我真是想不通）Then I don't get it.你知道吗钱德勒你得面对现实You know what Chandler I think you just gotta face it.你坐在这间大办公室里You're like the guy in the big office.有权录取他们也有权开除他们You're the one that hires and fires them.-他们说你还是个好上司 -是吗/- They still say you're a great boss. - They do但是他们不再是你的朋友Uh uh. But they're not your friends anymore.-我只是想 -但你不能- I just want - But you can't.但我只是想But I just want你不是要去...。

中央咖啡馆这没什么好说的There's nothing to tell!他不过是我的同事He's just some guy I work with!少来了你们都在约会了C'mon, you're going out with the guy!这个男人一定有什么问题There's gotta be something wrong with him!他是驼背吗戴着假发的驼背So does he have a hump? A hump and a hairpiece?等等他吃粉笔吗Wait, does he eat chalk?我只是不想你Just, 'cause, I don't want her to go through重蹈我和卡尔的覆辙what I went through with Carl拜托各位放松点这甚至不算是约会Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date.只不过是两个人出去吃个饭It's just two people going out to dinner而且不会上床and not having sex.听起来像是和我约会Sounds like a date to me.于是我回到了高中学校Alright, so I'm back in high school,我站在食堂中间I'm standing in the middle of the cafeteria然后发现自己全身赤裸and I realize I am totally naked.噢做过那种梦Oh, yeah. Had that dream.然后我低下头看见那里有一部Then I look down, and I realize there's a phone大哥大there.-那话儿变成了 -没错- Instead of...? - That's right.-这种梦倒从未做过 -没有- 《比利别逞英雄》 70年代反战歌曲还有个问题Y'know, here's the thing.就算我鼓足了勇气想约个女人出来Even if I could get it together enough to- to ask a woman out,...我又能约谁呢who am I gonna ask?不可思议吧Isn't this amazing?我这辈子从没泡过咖啡I mean, I have never made coffee before in my entire life.-真不可思议 -恭喜你了- That is amazing. - Congratulations.既然你现在正进入角色While you're on a roll有没有想做个煎蛋卷之类的东西If you feel like you have to make a Western omelet or something..不过事实上我还不太饿Although actually I'm really not that hungry...-早安 -早安- Morning. - Good morning.-早安 -早安保罗- Morning. - Morning, Paul.-你好保罗 -嗨保罗是吧- Hello, Paul. - Hi, Paul, is it?-谢谢太感谢你了 -不要这样- Thank you. Thank you so much. - Stop.晚点联系We'll talk later.谢谢你Yeah. Thank you.那还不叫真正的约会That wasn't a real date?!那你真正的约会到底要干些什么What the hell do you do on a real date?-闭嘴把桌子抬回去 -好啦- Shut up, and put my table back. - Okayyy!好了孩子们我必须上班去了All right, kids, I gotta get to work.但如果我不输入那些数字If I don't input those numbers...也没什么关系it doesn't make much of a difference...你们大伙儿都有工作So, like, you guys all have jobs?对我们都有工作Yeah, we all have jobs.这样才有钱买东西See, that's how we buy stuff.对我是个演员Yeah, I'm an actor.你演过什么我看过吗Wow! Would I have seen you in anything?难说大部分范围都挺小的I doubt it. Mostly regional work.等下除非你碰巧看过Oh wait, wait, unless you happened to catch the《匹诺曹》的重播Reruns' production of Pinocchio."瞧盖佩多我是真正的小男孩了"'Look, Gippetto, I'm a real live boy.'{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}《匹诺曹》的剧中台词-别这么侮辱人 -你说得对对不起- I will not take this abuse. - You're right, I'm sorry."我曾是个小木偶小木偶""Once I was a wooden boy, a little wooden boy..."今天感觉如何So how you doing today?睡得还好吧跟巴瑞谈过了吗Did you sleep okay? Talk to Barry?我无法停止笑I can't stop smiling.看得出来I can see that.你活像昨晚睡觉时嘴里放了个撑衣架You look like you slept with a hanger in your mouth.我知道他是那么I know, he's just so, so...还记得你和托尼·德马科吗Do you remember you and Tony DeMarco?记得啊Oh, yeah.就像那样那种感觉Well, it's like that. With feelings.-哇你真是有麻烦了- Wow,are you in trouble!好啦好啦我要站起来去工作Okay. Okay. I am just going to get up, go to work而且一整天都不要想他and not think about him all day.或者只是站起来去工作Or else I'm just gonna get up and go to work.-祝我好运 -为什么- Oh, look, wish me luck! - What for?我要去找那个工作什么的东西I'm gonna go get one of those job things.嘿莫妮卡Hey, Monica!嘿弗兰妮欢迎回来Hey Frannie, welcome back!在佛罗里达过得如何How was Florida?你做爱了对不You had sex, didn't you?-你怎么知道的- How do you do that?那么和谁So? Who?你认识保罗吧You know Paul?保罗那个调酒的Paul the Wine Guy?对我认识保罗Oh yeah, I know Paul.你是说你认识他就像我认识他一样You mean you know Paul like I know Paul?开玩笑吧保罗还欠我一个人情呢Are you kidding? I take credit for Paul.遇到我之前他已有两年无法过性生活Y'know before me, there was no snap in his turtle for two years.显然他是骗你的Of course it was a line!为什么为什么会有人那样做Why?! Why? Why, why would anybody do something like that?我想你是想让我们拿出一个I assume we're looking for an answer more sophisticated比"想和你上床"更为复杂的回答than 'to get you into bed'.问题出在我身上Is it me?难道我身上带着某种味儿Is it like I have some sort of beacon只有狗和有严重情感问题的男人才会发觉吗that only dogs and men with severe emotional problems can hear?好啦过来把你的脚给我All right, c'mere, gimme your feet.我只是以为他是个好男人I just thought he was nice, y'know?我真不相信你不知道那是个谎言I can't believe you didn't know it was a line!-猜猜怎么了 -你找到工作了- Guess what? - You got a job?开玩笑吗我什么都不会Are you kidding? I'm trained for nothing!今天十二个面试我都是被嘲笑轰出来的I was laughed out of twelve interviews today.不过你却异常兴奋And yet you're surprisingly upbeat.如果你遇见"约翰&大卫"的皮靴打五折You would be too if you found John and David boots on sale,也会跟我一样的fifty percent off!是呀你多了解我啊Oh, how well you know me...这就是我不需要工作They're my new 'I don't need a job,不需要父母一双好皮靴足矣I don't need my parents, I've got great boots' boots!你怎么付的款How'd you pay for them?用信用卡Uh, credit card.那谁付账单And who pays for that?我爸啊Um... my... father.拜托你不能靠你爸一辈子C'mon, you can't live off your parents your whole life.我知道这就是为什么我要结婚I know that. That's why I was getting married.饶了她吧第一次独立并不轻松Give her a break, it's hard being on your own for the first time.谢谢Thank you.不客气我记得我第一次来纽约时的情景You're welcome. I remember when I first came to this city.当时我十四岁I was fourteen.我妈刚自杀我继父再度入狱My mom had just killed herself and my step-dad was back in prison,我来到这里举目无亲and I got here, and I didn't know anybody.最后我和一个白化病患者住在一起And I ended up living with this albino guy who was, like,他给港务局的人清洗车窗玻璃cleaning windshields outside port authority,后来他也自杀了and then he killed himself,然后我成了按摩师and then I found aromatherapy.所以相信我我完全了解你的感受So believe me, I know exactly how you feel.你想要说的话是The word you're looking for is"无论如何""Anyway"...好了准备好了吗All right, you ready?-我不这么想- I don't think so.剪掉剪掉剪掉C'mon, cut. Cut, cut, cut,...欢迎来到现实世界Welcome to the real world!它糟透了但你会喜欢的It sucks. You're gonna love it!好啦你要睡在沙发上吗Well, that's it. You gonna crash on the couch?不我要回家老友记\第一季第一集没人告诉你生活会是这样\So no one told you life was gonna be this way 你滑稽的工作你的差劲\your jobs a joke, you're broke,你半途而废的爱情\your love life's D.O.A.就像开车卡在二档\It's like you're always stuck in second gear,每日每周每月\And it hasn't been your day, your week, your month,甚至每年都是如此\or even your year, but大雨倾盆时\I'll be there for you,我会陪伴你\when the rain starts to pour.我会陪伴你\I'll be there for you,像我以前那样\like I've been there before.我会陪伴你\I'll be there for you,因为你也陪伴着我\'cause you're there for me too.（注：可编辑下载，若有不当之处，请指正，谢谢!）。

你们男生不懂的是What you guys don’t understand is，接吻对女生的重要性for us， kissing is as important as any part of it。

是嘛Yeah, right！.。

当真吗Y'serious?当然Oh， yeah！初吻可以让人明白一切Everything you need to know is in that first kiss.没错Absolutely.对我们而言Yeah， I think for us,接吻就像是暖场序幕kissing is pretty much like an opening act, you know？｛\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad（0，0)\b0\pos（374，247）｝摇滚乐队就像平克·弗洛伊德出场前I mean it's like the stand-up comedian you have to sit through你得耐着性子先看完暖场搞笑秀before Pink Floyd comes out.对而且我们并非Yeah， and-and it’s not that讨厌搞笑表演而是因为we don’t like the comedian, it's that—that...只是我们买票又不是为了看搞笑秀that’s not why we bought the ticket。

问题在于演唱会结束后The problem is, though, after the concert’s over,不论表演有多精采no matter how great the show was，你们女生总还想再重温暖场搞笑秀you girls are always looking for the comedian again, you know?我们在车中奋力杀出车阵I mean， we're in the car， we're fighting traffic.。

《老友记》中英文对照剧本精编版第一季第20集120 The One With the Evil Orthodontist120 The One With the Evil Orthodontist[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is there.]Chandler: I can't believe you would actually say that. I would much rather be Mr.Peanut than Mr.Salty.Joey: No way! Mr.Salty is a sailor, all right, he's got to be, like, thetoughest snack there is.Ross: I don't know, you don't wanna mess with corn nuts. They're craaazy.Monica: (looking out of the window) Oh my God. You guys! You gotta come see this! There's some creep out there with a telescope! Ross: I can't believe it! He's looking right at us!Rachel: Oh, that is so sick.Chandler: I feel violated. And not in a good way.Phoebe: How can people do that?... (All but Phoebe walk away from the window in disgust.) Oh, you guys, look! Ugly Naked Guy got gravity boots!Opening Credits 120 风流牙医我真不敢相信你会这么说我是盐先生而非花生先生? 才怪，盐先生是个水手他应该是最顽强的点心我不知道你不会想和玉米作对的它们简直是疯了上帝呀有个变态拿着望远镜我真不敢相信他在看我们真呕心我感觉被冒犯了而且很不爽怎会有人这样?你们看，丑陋裸男有双重力鞋告诉你们。

102 The One With the Sonogram at the End [Scene Central Perk, everyone's there.]Monica: What you guys don't understand is, for us, kissing is as important as any part of it.Joey: Yeah, right!.......Y'serious?Phoebe: Oh, yeah!Rachel: Everything you need to know is in that first kiss. Monica: Absolutely.Chandler:Yeah, I think for us, kissing is pretty much like an opening act, y'know? I mean it's like the stand-up comedian you have to sit through before Pink Floyd comes out.Ross: Yeah, and-and it's not that we don't like the comedian, it's that-that... that's not why we bought the ticket.Chandler:The problem is, though, after the concert's over, no matter how great the show was, you girls are always looking for the comedian again, y'know? I mean, we're in the car, we're fighting traffic... basically just trying to stay awake.Rachel:Yeah, well, word of advice: Bring back the comedian. Otherwise next time you're gonna find yourself sitting at home, listening to that album alone.Joey: (pause)....Are we still talking about sex?Opening Credits[Scene: Museum of Prehistoric History, Ross and a co-worker (Marsha) are setting up an exhibit which includes some mannequins of cave people.]Ross:No, it's good, it is good, it's just that- mm- doesn't she seem a little angry?Marsha: Well, she has issues.Ross: Does she？Marsha:He's out banging other women over the head with a club, while she sits at home trying to get the mastodon smell out of the carpet! Ross:Marsha, these are cave people. Okay? They have issues like 'Gee, that glacier's getting kinda close.' See?Marsha: Speaking of issues, isn't that your ex-wife?(Carol, Ross's ex-wife, has entered behind them and is standing outstide the exhibit.)Ross: (trying to ignore her) No. No.Marsha: Yes, it is. Carol! Hi!Ross: Okay, okay, yes, it is. (waves) How about I'll, uh, catch up with you in the Ice Age.(Marsha extis and Ross waves Carol into the exhibit.)Ross:Hi.Carol: So.Ross: You look great. I, uh... I hate that.Carol: Sorry. You look good too.Ross:Ah, well, in here, anyone who... stands erect... So what's new? Still, uh...Carol: A lesbian?Ross: Well... you never know. How's, um.. how's the family? Carol: Marty's still totally paranoid. Oh, and, uh-Ross: Why- why are you here, Carol?Carol: I'm pregnant.Ross: Pregnant?![Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Joey, Phoebe, and Monica are watching Three's Company.]Chandler: Oh, I think this is the episode of Three's Company where there's some kind of misunderstanding.Phoebe:...Then I've already seen this one! (Turns off the TV.) Monica: (taking a drink fr om Joey) Are you through with that? Joey: Yeah, sorry, the swallowing slowed me down.Monica: Whose little ball of paper is this?! 102 参加助产训练班你们男生不懂亲吻对女生的重要性没错，当真?当真.你想了解的一切全在初吻之中没错对我们而言亲吻就像是开场，就像佛洛伊飞船出场前，你得耐着性子先看完脱口秀对，我们并非讨厌脱口秀，但那不是我们买票的原因问题出在于演唱会结束后，不论表演有多精采，你们女生总还想再看脱口秀，我们在车上奋力杀出车阵，只是拼命让自己别睡着是哦?给你一个建议。

1.Shall I go on? 我还要继续吗2.Just keep smiling3.You spoiled everything 你搞砸了一切4.My friend and family are out there! How can I face them？我的亲朋好友都在场，以后我还怎么见人5.She’s just fixing her makeup 她要补妆6.I hope you don’t take this the wrong way 我希望你别误会7.I know we had plans to meet up tonight 我知道我们今天晚上约了要见面8.How could we have let this happen? 我们怎么这么不小心9.I don’t see that we have a choice. 看来我们别无选择10.I gotta ask you something. 我有事情要问你11.Is all out fault? Were we bad parents? 这是我们的错吗，没把小孩教好12.How are you supposed to eat this? 怎么来吃啊13.Forget it. That’s off.算了吧当我没说14.It’s doesn’t count 不算15.I’m sorry things aren’t working out 抱歉，事情竟然会出问题16.She’ll get over this. 她不会放在心上的17.It didn’t mean anything. It’s a mistake. 根本就没什么，只是一个无心之过18.tow the line, thread the needle听天由命，努力争取19.think outside the box 不要死心眼20.If you don’t realize that, I can’t help you如果你还不懂，我也没法了21.It could be better. It’ll be okay, right?22.If I scream, Yippee, just ignore me。

Tu 101 The One Where Monica Gets a New Roommate (The Pilot-The Uncut Version)[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, Phoebe, and Monica are there.]Monica: There's nothing to tell! He's just some guy I work with! Joey:C'mon, you're going out with the guy! There's gotta be something wrong with him!Chandler:All right Joey, be nice. So does he have a hump? A hump and a hairpiece?Phoebe: Wait, does he eat chalk?(They all stare, bemused.)Phoebe: Just, 'cause, I don't want her to go through what I went through with Carl- oh!Monica: Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. It's just two people going out to dinner and- not having sex. Chandler: Sounds like a date to me.[Time Lapse]Chandler: Alright, so I'm back in high school, I'm standing in the middle of the cafeteria, and I realize I am totally naked.All: Oh, yeah. Had that dream.Chandler: Then I look down, and I realize there's a phone... there.Joey: Instead of...?Chandler: That's right.Joey: Never had that dream.Phoebe: No.Chandler: All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring. Now I don't know what to do, everybody starts looking at me.Monica: And they weren't looking at you before?!Chandler: Finally, I figure I'd better answer it, and it turns out it's my mother, which is very-very weird, because- she never calls me! [Time Lapse, Ross has entered.]Ross: (mortified) Hi.Joey: This guy says hello, I wanna kill myself.Monica: Are you okay, sweetie?Ross: I just feel like someone reached down my throat, grabbed my small intestine, pulled it out of my mouth and tied it around my neck...Chandler: Cookie?Monica: (explaining to the others) Carol moved her stuff out today. Joey: Ohh.Monica: (to Ross) Let me get you some coffee.Ross: Thanks.Phoebe: Ooh! Oh! (She starts to pluck at the air just in front ofRoss.)Ross: No, no don't! Stop cleansing my aura! No, just leave my aura alone, okay?Phoebe: Fine! Be murky!Ross: I'll be fine, alright? Really, everyone. I hope she'll be very happy.Monica: No you don't.Ross: No I don't, to hell with her, she left me!Joey: And you never knew she was a lesbian...Ross: No!! Okay?! Why does everyone keep fixating on that? She didn't know, how should I know?Chandler: Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian... (They all stare at him.) Did I say that out loud?Ross: I told mom and dad last night, they seemed to take it pretty well.Monica: Oh really, so that hysterical phone call I got from a woman at sobbing 3:00 A.M., "I'll never have grandchildren, I'll never have grandchildren." was what? A wrong number?Ross: Sorry.Joey:Alright Ross, look. You're feeling a lot of pain right now. You're angry. You're hurting. Can I tell you what the answer is? (Ross gestures his consent.)Joey:Strip joint! C'mon, you're single! Have some hormone s! Ross: I don't want to be single, okay? I just... I just- I just wanna be married again!(Rachel enters in a wet wedding dress and starts to search the room.)Chandler: And I just want a million dollars! (He extends his hand hopefully.)Monica: Rachel?!Rachel: Oh God Monica hi! Thank God! I just went to your building and you weren't there and then this guy with a big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are!Waitress: Can I get you some coffee?Monica: (pointing at Rachel) De-caff. (to All) Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (to Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?Rachel: Hi, sure!Ross: Hi.(They go to hug but Ross's umbrella opens. He sits back down defeated again. A moment of silence follows as Rachel sits and the others expect her to explain.)Monica: So you wanna tell us now, or are we waiting for four wetbridesmaids?Rachel:Oh God... well, it started about a half hour before the wedding. I was in the room where we were keeping all the presents, and I was looking at this gravy boat. This really gorgeous Lamauge gravy boat. When all of a sudden- (to the waitress that brought her coffee)Sweet 'n' Lo?- I realized that I was more turned on by this gravy boat than by Barry! And then I got really freaked out, and that's when it hit me: how much Barry looks like Mr. Potato Head. Y'know, I mean, I always knew looked familiar, but... Anyway, I just had to get out of there, and I started wondering 'Why am I doing this, and who am I doing this for?'. (to Monica) So anyway I just didn't know where to go, and I know that you and I have kinda drifted apart, but you're the only person I knew who lived here in the city.Monica: Who wasn't invited to the wedding.Rachel:Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn't be an issue... [Scene: Monica's Apartment, everyone is there and watching a Spanish Soap on TV and are trying to figure out what is going on.] Monica: Now I'm guessing that he bought her the big pipe organ, and she's really not happy about it.Chandler: (imitating the characters) Tuna or egg salad? Decide! Ross: (in a deep voice) I'll have whatever Christine is having.Rachel: (on phone) Daddy, I just... I can't marry him! I'm sorry. I just don't love him. Well, it matters to me!(The scene on TV has changed to show two women, one is holding her hair.)Phoebe:If I let go of my hair, my head will fall off. Chandler: (re TV) Ooh, she should not be wearing those pants. Joey: I say push her down the stairs. Phoebe, Ross, Chandler, and Joey:Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs!(She is pushed down the stairs and everyone cheers.)Rachel: C'mon Daddy, listen to me! It's like, it's like, all of my life, everyone has always told me, 'You're a shoe! You're a shoe, you're a shoe, you're a shoe!'. And today I just stopped and I said, 'What if I don't wanna be a shoe? What if I wanna be a- a purse, y'know? Or a- or a hat! No, I'm not saying I want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying I am a ha- It's a metaphor, Daddy!Ross: You can see where he'd have trouble.Rachel: Look Daddy, it's my life. Well maybe I'll just stay here with Monica.Monica: Well, I guess we've established who's staying here with Monica...Rachel: Well, maybe that's my decision. Well, maybe I don't needyour money. Wait!! Wait, I said maybe!![Time Lapse, Rachel is breating into a paper bag.]Monica: Just breathe, breathe.. that's it. Just try to think of nice calm things... Phoebe: (sings) Raindrops on roses and rabbits and kittens, (Rachel and Monica turn to look at her.) bluebells and sleighbells and- something with mittens... La la la la...something and noodles with string. These are a few...Rachel: I'm all better now.Phoebe: (grins and walks to the kitchen and says to Chandler and Joey.) I helped!Monica:Okay, look, this is probably for the best, y'know? Independence. Taking control of your life. The whole, 'hat' thing. Joey:(comforting her) And hey, you need anything, you can always come to Joey. Me and Chandler live across the hall. And he's away a lot.Monica: Joey, stop hitting on her! It's her wedding day!Joey: What, like there's a rule or something?(The door buzzer sounds and Chandler gets it.)Chandler: Please don't do that again, it's a horrible sound. Paul: (over the intercom) It's, uh, it's Paul.Monica: Oh God, is it 6:30? Buzz him in!Joey: Who's Paul?Ross: Paul the Wine Guy, Paul?Monica: Maybe. Joey: Wait. Your 'not a real date' tonight is with Paul the Wine Guy?Ross: He finally asked you out?Monica: Yes!Chandler: Ooh, this is a Dear Diary moment.Monica: Rach, wait, I can cancel...Rachel: Please, no, go, that'd be fine!Monica: (to Ross) Are, are you okay? I mean, do you want me to stay?Ross: (choked voice) That'd be good...Monica: (horrified) Really?Ross: (normal voice) No, go on! It's Paul the Wine Guy! Phoebe: What does that mean? Does he sell it, drink it, or just complain a lot? (Chandler doesn't know.)(There's a knock on the door and it's Paul.)Monica: Hi, come in! Paul, this is.. (They are all lined up next to the door.)... everybody, everybody, this is Paul.All: Hey! Paul! Hi! The Wine Guy! Hey!Chandler: I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name. Paul, was it? Monica: Okay, umm-umm, I'll just--I'll be right back, I just gotta go ah, go ah...Ross: A wandering?Monica: Change! Okay, sit down. (Shows Paul in) Two seconds. Phoebe: Ooh, I just pulled out four eyelashes. That can't be good. (Monica goes to change.)Joey:Hey, Paul!Paul: Yeah?Joey: Here's a little tip, she really likes it when you rub her neck in the same spot over and over and over again until it starts to get a little red.Monica: (yelling from the bedroom) Shut up, Joey!Ross: So Rachel, what're you, uh... what're you up to tonight? Rachel: Well, I was kinda supposed to be headed for Aruba on my honeymoon, so nothing!Ross: Right, you're not even getting your honeymoon, God.. No, no, although, Aruba, this time of year... talk about your- (thinks) -big lizards... Anyway, if you don't feel like being alone tonight, Joey and Chandler are coming over to help me put together my new furniture.Chandler: (deadpan) Yes, and we're very excited about it. Rachel: Well actually thanks, but I think I'm just gonna hang out here tonight. It's been kinda a long day.Ross: Okay, sure.Joey: Hey Pheebs, you wanna help?Phoebe: Oh, I wish I could, but I don't want to.Commercial Break[Scene: The Subway, Phoebe is singing for change.]Phoebe:(singing) Love is sweet as summer showers, love is a wondrous work of art, but your love oh your love, your love...is like a giant pigeon...crapping on my heart. La-la-la-la-la- (some guy gives her some change and to that guy) Thank you. (sings) La-la-la-la...ohhh![Scene: Ross's Apartment, the guys are there assembling furniture.] Ross:(squatting and reading the instructions) I'm supposed to attach a brackety thing to the side things, using a bunch of these little worm guys. I have no brackety thing, I see no whim guys whatsoever and- I cannot feel my legs.(Joey and Chandler are finishing assembling the bookcase.) Joey: I'm thinking we've got a bookcase here.Chandler: It's a beautiful thing.Joey: (picking up a leftover part) What's this?Chandler: I would have to say that is an 'L'-shaped bracket. Joey: Which goes where?Chandler: I have no idea.(Joey checks that Ross is not looking and dumps it in a plant.)Joey: Done with the bookcase!Chandler: All finished!Ross: (clutching a beer can and sniffing) This was Carol's favorite beer. She always drank it out of the can, I should have known. Joey: Hey-hey-hey-hey, if you're gonna start with that stuff we're outta here.Chandler: Yes, please don't spoil all this fun.Joey: Ross, let me ask you a question. She got the furniture, the stereo, the good TV- what did you get?Ross: You guys.Chandler: Oh, God.Joey: You got screwed.Chandler: Oh my God![Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Paul are eating.]Monica: Oh my God!Paul:I know, I know, I'm such an idiot. I guess I should have caught on when she started going to the dentist four and five times a week. I mean, how clean can teeth get?Monica: My brother's going through that right now, he's such a mess. How did you get through it?Paul: Well, you might try accidentally breaking something valuable of hers, say her-Monica: -leg?Paul: (laughing) That's one way! Me, I- I went for the watch. Monica: You actually broke her watch? Wow! The worst thing I ever did was, I-I shredded by boyfriend's favorite bath towel. Paul: Ooh, steer clear of you.Monica: That's right. [Scene: Monica's Apartment, Rachel is talking on the phone and pacing.]Rachel: Barry, I'm sorry... I am so sorry... I know you probably think that this is all about what I said the other day about you making love with your socks on, but it isn't... it isn't, it's about me, and I ju- (She stops talking and dials the phone.) Hi, machine cut me off again... anyway...look, look, I know that some girl is going to be incredibly lucky to become Mrs. Barry Finkel, but it isn't me, it's not me. And not that I have any idea who me is right now, but you just have to give me a chance too... (The maching cuts her off again and she redials.)[Scene: Ross's Apartment; Ross is pacing while Joey and Chandler are working on some more furniture.]Ross: I'm divorced! I'm only 26 and I'm divorced!Joey: Shut up!Chandler: You must stop! (Chandler hits what he is working on with a hammer and it collapses.)Ross: That only took me an hour.Chandler:Look, Ross, you gotta understand, between us we haven't had a relationship that has lasted longer than a Mento. You, however have had the love of a woman for four years. Four years of closeness and sharing at the end of which she ripped your heart out, and that is why we don't do it! I don't think that was my point!Ross: You know what the scariest part is? What if there's only one woman for everybody, y'know? I mean what if you get one woman- and that's it? Unfortunately in my case, there was only one woman- for her...Joey: What are you talking about? 'One woman'? That's like saying there's only one flavor of ice cream for you. Lemme tell you something, Ross. There's lots of flavors out there. There's Rocky Road, and Cookie Dough, and Bing! Cherry Vanilla. You could get 'em with Jimmies, or nuts, or whipped cream! This is the best thing that ever happened to you! You got married, you were, like, what, eight? Welcome back to the world! Grab a spoon!Ross: I honestly don't know if I'm hungry or horny. Chandler: Stay out of my freezer! [Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Paul are still eating.]Paul: Ever since she walked out on me, I, uh...Monica: What?..... What, you wanna spell it out with noodles? Paul: No, it's, it's more of a fifth date kinda revelation. Monica: Oh, so there is gonna be a fifth date?Paul: Isn't there?Monica: Yeah... yeah, I think there is. -What were you gonna say? Paul: Well, ever-ev-... ever since she left me, um, I haven't been able to, uh, perform. (Monica takes a sip of her drink.) ...Sexually. Monica: (spitting out her drink in shock) Oh God, oh God, I am sorry... I am so sorry...Paul: It's okay...Monica: I know being spit on is probably not what you need right now. Um... how long?Paul: Two years.Monica: Wow! I'm-I'm-I'm glad you smashed her watch!Paul: So you still think you, um... might want that fifth date? Monica: (pause)...Yeah. Yeah, I do.[Scene: Monica's Apartment, Rachel is watching Joanne Loves Chaci.]Priest on TV: We are gathered here today to join Joanne Louise Cunningham and Charles, Chachi-Chachi-Chachi, Arcola in the bound of holy matrimony.Rachel: Oh...see... but Joanne loved Chachi! That's the difference![Scene: Ross's Apartment, they're all sitting around and talking.] Ross: (scornful) Grab a spoon. Do you know how long it's been since I've grabbed a spoon? Do the words 'Billy, don't be a hero' mean anything to you?Joey:Great story! But, I uh, I gotta go, I got a date with Andrea--Angela--Andrea... Oh man, (looks to Chandler) Chandler: Angela's the screamer, Andrea has cats.Joey: Right. Thanks. It's June. I'm outta here. (Exits.) Ross:Y'know, here's the thing. Even if I could get it together enough to- to ask a woman out,... who am I gonna ask? (He gazes out of the window.)[Cut to Rachel staring out of her window.]Commercial Break[Scene: Monica's Apartment, Rachel is making coffee for Joey and Chandler.]Rachel:Isn't this amazing? I mean, I have never made coffee before in my entire life.Chandler: That is amazing.Joey: Congratulations.Rachel: Y'know, I figure if I can make coffee, there isn't anything I can't do.Chandler: If can invade Poland, there isn't anything I can't do.Joey: Listen, while you're on a roll, if you feel like you gotta make like a Western omelet or something... (Joey and Chandler taste the coffee, grimace, and pour it into a plant pot.) Although actually I'm really not that hungry...Monica: (entering, to herself) Oh good, Lenny and Squigy are here. All: Morning. Good morning.Paul: (entering from Monica's room) Morning.Joey: Morning, Paul.Rachel: Hello, Paul.Chandler: Hi, Paul, is it?(Monica and Paul walk to the door and talk in a low voice so the others can't hear. The others move Monica's table closer to the door so that they can.)Paul: Thank you! Thank you so much!Monica: Stop!Paul: No, I'm telling you last night was like umm, all my birthdays, both graduations, plus the barn raising scene in Witness. Monica: We'll talk later.Paul: Yeah. (They kiss) Thank you. (Exits)Joey: That wasn't a real date?! What the hell do you do on a real date?Monica: Shut up, and put my table back.All: Okayyy! (They do so.)Chandler: All right, kids, I gotta get to work. If I don't input those numbers,... it doesn't make much of a difference...Rachel: So, like, you guys all have jobs?Monica: Yeah, we all have jobs. See, that's how we buy stuff. Joey: Yeah, I'm an actor.Rachel: Wow! Would I have seen you in anything?Joey: I doubt it. Mostly regional work.Monica: Oh wait, wait, unless you happened to catch the Reruns' production of Pinocchio, at the little theater in the park.Joey: Look, it was a job all right?Chandler: 'Look, Gippetto, I'm a real live boy.'Joey: I will not take this abuse. (Walks to the door and opens it to leave.)Chandler: You're right, I'm sorry. (Burst into song and dances out of the door.) "Once I was a wooden boy, a little wooden boy..." Joey: You should both know, that he's a dead man. Oh, Chandler? (Starts after Chandler.) Monica: So how you doing today? Did you sleep okay? Talk to Barry? I can't stop smiling.Rachel: I can see that. You look like you slept with a hanger in your mouth.Monica: I know, he's just so, so... Do you remember you and TonyDeMarco?Rachel: Oh, yeah.Monica: Well, it's like that. With feelings.Rachel: Oh wow. Are you in trouble.Monica: Big time!Rachel: Want a wedding dress? Hardly used.Monica: I think we are getting a little ahead of selves here. Okay. Okay. I am just going to get up, go to work and not think about him all day. Or else I'm just gonna get up and go to work.Rachel: Oh, look, wish me luck!Monica: What for?Rachel: I'm gonna go get one of those (Thinks) job things. (Monica exits.)[Scene: Iridium, Monica is working as Frannie enters.] Frannie: Hey, Monica!Monica: Hey Frannie, welcome back! How was Florida? Frannie: You had sex, didn't you?Monica: How do you do that?Frannie: Oh, I hate you, I'm pushing my Aunt Roz through Parrot Jungle and you're having sex! So? Who?Monica: You know Paul?Frannie: Paul the Wine Guy? Oh yeah, I know Paul.Monica: You mean you know Paul like I know Paul?Frannie: Are you kidding? I take credit for Paul. Y'know before me, there was no snap in his turtle for two years.[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Rachel is there.]Joey: (sitting on the arm of the couch)Of course it was a line! Monica: Why?! Why? Why, why would anybody do something like that?Ross:I assume we're looking for an answer more sophisticated than 'to get you into bed'.Monica: I hate men! I hate men!Phoebe: Oh no, don't hate, you don't want to put that out into the universe.Monica: Is it me? Is it like I have some sort of beacon that only dogs and men with severe emotional problems can hear? Phoebe: All right, c'mere, gimme your feet. (She starts massaging them.)Monica: I just thought he was nice, y'know?Joey: (bursts out laughing again) I can't believe you didn't know it was a line!(Monica pushes him off of the sofa as Rachel enters with a shopping bag.)Rachel: Guess what?Ross: You got a job?Rachel: Are you kidding? I'm trained for nothing! I was laughed out of twelve interviews today.Chandler: And yet you're surprisingly upbeat.Rachel: You would be too if you found John and David boots on sale, fifty percent off!Chandler: Oh, how well you know me...Rachel:They're my new 'I don't need a job, I don't need my parents, I've got great boots' boots!Monica: How'd you pay for them?Rachel: Uh, credit card.Monica: And who pays for that?Rachel: Um... my... father.[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is sitting around the kitchen table. Rachel's credit cards are spread out on the table along with a pair of scissors.]Rachel:Oh God, come on you guys, is this really necessary? I mean, I can stop charging anytime I want.Monica: C'mon, you can't live off your parents your whole life. Rachel: I know that. That's why I was getting married. Phoebe: Give her a break, it's hard being on your own for the first time.Rachel: Thank you.Phoebe: You're welcome. I remember when I first came to this city.I was fourteen. My mom had just killed herself and my step-dad was back in prison, and I got here, and I didn't know anybody. And I ended up living with this albino guy who was, like, cleaning windshields outside port authority, and then he killed himself, and then I found aromatherapy. So believe me, I know exactly how you feel.(Pause)Ross: The word you're looking for is 'Anyway'...Monica: All right, you ready?Rachel: No. No, no, I'm not ready! How can I be ready? "Hey, Rach! You ready to jump out the airplane without your parachute?" Come on, I can't do this!Monica: You can, I know you can!Rachel: I don't think so.Ross:Come on, you made coffee! You can do anything! (Chandler slowly tries to hide the now dead plant from that morning when he and Joey poured their coffee into it.)Ross: C'mon, cut. Cut, cut, cut,...All: Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut... (She cuts one of them and they cheer.)Rachel: Y'know what? I think we can just leave it at that. It's kinda like a symbolic gesture...Monica:Rachel! That was a library card!All: Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut..Chandler: (as Rachel is cutting up her cards) Y'know, if you listen closely, you can hear a thousand retailers scream.(She finishes cutting them up and they all cheer.)Monica: Welcome to the real world! It sucks. You're gonna love it! [Time Lapse, Rachel and Ross are watching a TV channel finishes it's broadcast day by playing the national anthem.]Monica: Well, that's it (To Ross) You gonna crash on the couch? Ross: No. No, I gotta go home sometime.Monica: You be okay?Ross: Yeah.Rachel:Hey Mon, look what I just found on the floor. (Monica smiles.) What?Monica: That's Paul's watch. You just put it back where you found it. Oh boy. Alright. Goodnight, everybody.Ross and Rachel: Goodnight.(Monica stomps on Paul's watch and goes into her room.) Ross: Mmm. (They both reach for the last cookie) Oh, no- Rachel: Sorry-Ross: No no no, go-Rachel: No, you have it, really, I don't want it-Ross: Split it?Rachel: Okay.Ross: Okay. (They split it.) You know you probably didn't know this, but back in high school, I had a, um, major crush on you. Rachel: I knew.Ross:You did! Oh.... I always figured you just thought I was Monica's geeky older brother.Rachel: I did.Ross:Oh. Listen, do you think- and try not to let my intense vulnerability become any kind of a factor here- but do you think it would be okay if I asked you out? Sometime? Maybe?Rachel: Yeah, maybe...Ross: Okay... okay, maybe I will...Rachel: Goodnight.Ross: Goodnight.(Rachel goes into her room and Monica enters the living room as Ross is leaving.)Monica: See ya.... Waitwait, what's with you?Ross: I just grabbed a spoon. (Ross exits and Monica has no idea what that means.)Closing Credits[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there.]Joey: I can't believe what I'm hearing here.Phoebe: (sings) I can't believe what I'm hearing here... Monica: What? I-I said you had a-Phoebe: (sings) What I said you had...Monica: (to Phoebe) Would you stop?Phoebe: Oh, was I doing it again?All: Yes!Monica: I said that you had a nice butt, it's just not a great butt. Joey: Oh, you wouldn't know a great butt if it came up and bit ya. Ross: There's an image.Rachel: (walks up with a pot of coffee) Would anybody like more coffee?Chandler: Did you make it, or are you just serving it?Rachel: I'm just serving it.All: Yeah. Yeah, I'll have a cup of coffee.Chandler: Kids, new dream... I'm in Las Vegas. (Rachel sits down to hear Chandler's dream.)Customer: (To Rachel) Ahh, miss? More coffee?Rachel:Ugh. (To another customer that's leaving.) Excuse me, could you give this to that guy over there? (Hands him the coffeepot.) Go ahead. (He does so.) Thank you. (To the gang.) Sorry. Okay, Las Vegas.Chandler: Okay, so, I'm in Las Vegas... I'm Liza Minelli-End。

-告诉他 -就告诉他嘛- Tell him. - Just tell him.-闭嘴 -告诉我什么- Shut up. - Tell me what?你看你连正眼看他都不敢Look at you, you won't even look at him.就告诉我吧Oh, come on tell me.下回有女人不肯看我我也好有新理由I could use another reason why women won't look at me. 好吧好吧昨晚我梦见All right. All right. Last night, I had a dream that uh...我和你...that you and I were在这桌上做爱doing it on this table.梦里干的不错嘛Excellent dream score.你怎会有这种梦Why would you dream that?最重要的是More importantly...我棒吗...was I any good?简直是棒极了Well, you were pretty damn good.真有意思在我梦中我非常力不从心Interesting. Cause in my dreams, I'm surprisingly inadequate. 昨晚你在这桌上的表现完美无缺Last night, you seemed to know your way around the table. 真高兴能与你们分享I love it when we share.你没事吧You okay there?我不敢相信你会在她梦中做爱I can't believe you two had sex in her dream.抱歉仅此一次I'm sorry, it was a one-time thing.我醉得不省人事而且这不是我的潜意识I was very drunk, and it was someone else's subconscious.你好呀瑞秋Hello, Rachel.下去Get off.给我你们能想像我操作钻床的样子吗Ooh, give me. Can you see me operating a drill press?不知道你当时穿什么I don't know. What are you wearing?菲比你为何想操作钻床Phoebe, why would you want to operate a drill press? 只是暂时的工作Just for some short-term-work.直到我找回一部分前按摩客户You know, until I get back some of my massage clients. 又是海盗吗Pirates again?不根本不贴边No. Nothing like that.我真是个大笨蛋I'm just such a dummy.我教他们"自己在家动手做按摩"I taught a "Massage Yourself at Home" workshop.结果他们就不来了And they are.嗨钱德勒她可以为你工作Hey, Chan, she could work for you.谢了乔伊这是个好主意Thanks, Joey. That's a good idea.我可以我来吧什么工作I could. I could do it. What is it?我秘书这几周无法来上班My secretary's gonna be out for a couple of weeks.她去给一侧乳房动消乳手术She's having one of her boobs reduced.一言难尽的波霸故事It's a whole big boob story.我可以当个秘书I could be a secretary.菲比我不知你是否是这块料Phoebes, I don't know if it's your kinda thing...因为这份工作需要你大部分时间... because it involves a lot being normal尽可能保持正常for a large portion of the day.我能办到I could do that.-你玩什么呢 -我的新传呼机-What are you playing with? -It's my new beeper.古生物学家要那玩意儿干嘛What the hell does a paleontologist need a beeper for? 以防恐龙紧急事件救命啊快来Is it like for dinosaur emergencies? Help. come quick, 他们还是绝种了They're still extinct.不是为卡罗尔生产买的No. It's for when Carol goes into labor.好让她随时联系到我She can get me wherever I am.她只需拨号55-金宝All she has to do is dial 55-Jimbo.{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}Jimbo在美国俚语中指"不请自来的人"这号码真酷还能当孩子的名字A cool number and a possible name for the kid.-各位回头见了 -去见小伊森吗- All right, I'll see you guys later. - Off to see young Ethan?谢谢Thank you.伊森到底有多小很小吗How young is young Ethan? Young?年纪和我们差不多He's our age.当我们还是When we were...-他是大学四年级学生 -大学- He's a senior in college. - College?这位小朋友不在乎你的年纪吗This man-child has no problem with how old you are?当然不在乎这根本不是问题No, of course not. It's not even an issue...因为我告诉他我22岁...because I told him I was 22.-你什么 -什么- You what? - What?-我不像22岁吗 -25 26还说得过去- Oh, I can't pass for 22? - Well, maybe 25, 26.-我本来就26 -那就对啦- I am 26. - There you go.-听见没 -听见了- Can you hear that? - Yeah.知道不拿起电话就不会响了You see, that'll stop when you pick up the phone. -我来了 -好的- Oh, I'm on. - Okay.宾先生办公室Mr. Bing's office.抱歉他正在开会.No, I'm Sorry, he's in a meeting right now.我没在开会我在...I'm not in a meeting. I'm right... Whoops.他知道这件事吗Will he know what this is in reference to?他有你的号码吗And he has your number?好我会转告他的再见I'll see that he gets the message. Bye-bye.罗斯打来问候的Ross says hi.真好玩好了我们现在做什么This is so fun. All right. What do we do now?现在我得开始工作了Well, now I actually have to get to work."可能吧""Most likely."好了我出去了Okay, I'm gonna be out there.好的再见All right. Bye-bye.再见Bye-bye.-什么事 -你在干嘛- Yes? - What you doing?窗户擦好了蜡烛点上了Okay, windows are clean. Candles are lit.皮带太紧我得去换一条Belt's too tight. Gotta change the belt.鱼翻过没没因为我做的意大利面Did I turn the fish? Nope, because I made lasagna.-我有没有失控 -有一点点- Am I out of control? - Just a touch.莫妮卡我不明白Mon, I don't understand.你跟这个男生从他期中考试后I mean, you've been dating this guy since like, what...谈到现在... his midterms.为什么突然Why, all of a sudden, are you so...?-我怎么了 -今晚会是销魂一夜吗- What? - Could tonight be the night?我不知道他是个好男孩I don't know. He's a great guy...我喜欢和他在一起但是很难说...and I love being with him. But, you know...只能顺其自然无法预先计划好...things happen when they happen. You don't plan these things. -腿毛刮了没 -刮了- So, did you shave your legs? - Yeah.罗斯别纠结了这只是一场梦Would you let it go, Ross? It was just a dream.不代表...It doesn't mean时候到了宝宝要出世了This is it. Oh my God! It's baby time! Baby time!放轻松冷静点别紧张All right, relax. Just relax. Be cool.对刚有人呼我Yeah, hi. I was just beeped.不安卓不在这今天呼错三次了No, Andre is not here. Third time today.对我确定Yes, I am sure.不先生我不提供那些服务No, sir, I do not perform those kind of services.服务Services?懂了服务嘛Oh, services.对你要呼的是55-劲爆Yeah, you want 55-Jumbo.{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}jumbo是庞然大物的意思没错That's right.没错是劲爆不是金宝先生That's right. JUMBO with a "U," sir.不相信我你不会想要我的No, belive me, You don't want me.从他的号码看来你看到我会大失所望Judging by his number, I'd be a huge disappointment. 好吧再见了Alrighty, bye-bye.第一天上班如何How was the first day?太棒了每个人都非常非常好Excellent. Everyone was so, so nice.瞧认识我这种职位的人多沾光It pays to know the man who wears my shoes.说的是我Me.不我没告诉任何人我认识你No. I didn't tell anyone I knew you.-为什么 -因为你懂的- Why not? - Well, because, you know.他们并不喜欢你They don't like you.-什么 -我以为你早知道- What? - I thought you knew that.-谁不喜欢我 -每个人- No, who doesn't like me? - Everyone.除了Except for....不每个人No. Everyone.-你在说什么啊 -别难过- What are you talking about? - Don't feel bad.他们过去都很喜欢你They used to like you a lot.自从你升职后But then you got promoted, and, you know,他们感觉你是上司大人物now you're like Mr. Boss Man. you know, Mr. Big. 宾先生宾大老板Mr. Bing. Boss Man Bing.-真不敢相信 -他们甚至还模仿你- I can't believe it. - Yeah. They even do you.模仿我They "do" me?对比如这样You know, like, okay:报告要"何时"才能交来"Could that report be any later?"-我没有那样说话 -你有的- I don't sound like that. - Yeah, you do.这山谷回荡着美妙的"The hills are alive with the sound..."音乐"声...of music."我的烤饼 "我"的烤饼"My scone. My scone."我没那样说话这绝"不"是真的I don't sound like that. That is so not true."不"是这样 "不"是这样That is so not... That is so not...这闭嘴吧That Oh, shut up.-不会吧 -告诉你我到九岁时- Did not. - I'm telling you, up until I was 9...还以为"枪口"就是真实存在的犯罪现场... I thought "gunpoint" was an actual place where crimes happened. -怎么会 -新闻老是报导犯罪事件- How's that possible? - Well, think about it. It's always on the news. 某人在"枪口"下"A man is being held up at Gunpoint."惊慌的观光客在"枪口"下"Tourists are terrorized at Gunpoint."我一直在想怎么还有人去那儿And I kept thinking, "Why do people continue to go there?"-我该走了 -好- I should go. - Ok.-除非 -什么- Unless. - What?除非你要在这儿过夜Unless you wanna stay over.我反正要在这过夜不如I mean, I'm going to. So....是啊这样再好不过Yeah, I'd really like that.在我们考虑留宿的事宜之前Before we get into any staying-over stuff...我有些事情必须告诉你...there's something you should know.是"我明天一早有课"之类的Ok. Is this, like, "I have an early class tomorrow"...还是"我与山羊秘密结婚了"...or "I'm secretly married to a goat"?在这两者之间Well, it's somewhere in between.就严格技术层面而言当然我还没You see, in a strictly technical sense, of course, I'm not.... 我是说我还没有Well, I mean, I haven't ever....-伊森 -在- Ethan? - Yeah.你是处男吗Are you a virgin?如果你们这些孩子现在这样称呼的话If that's what you kids are calling it these days, then... 对我是个处男...yes, I am.我大概一直在等待适合的人I've kind of been waiting for the right person.-真的吗 -真的- Really? - Yeah.你知道我是在指你吧You do know I was talking about you, right?你一直喔个不停You keep saying that.你懂的你在杂志上看过在电影里看过You know, you read about it. You see it in the movies. 甚至在家里练习过可是天啊Even when you practice it at home, man, oh, man... 这感觉实在没得比...it is nothing like that.听着听着Listen, listen.你对我坦白了一件难以启齿的事You told me something that was really difficult for you. 我想如果你能坦诚相对那我也能And I figure if you can be honest, then I can too.天啊别告诉我刚才做错了Oh, God. Don't tell me I did it wrong.不那件事你做得非常完美No, no, no. Nothing wrong about that.好我说了Ok, Here goes.我不是22岁I'm not 22.我是25岁I'm 25...零13个月...and 13 months.但是我想我们的关系不会因此变掉But I figure, you know, that shouldn't change anything. 年龄根本就不是距离对吧I mean, what the hell does it matter how old we are? 听着Listen...在你坦承之际...as long as we're telling stuff...我也有话要说... I have another one for you.我比你所知的年纪还小I'm a little younger than I said.-你不是四年级生吗 -我是四年级- You're not a senior? - Oh, I'm a senior...高中四年级...in high school.我们不应该这样What we did was wrong.天啊我刚和一个God, I just had sex with不到二十岁的小屁孩做爱了someone who wasn't alive during the bicentennial.{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}bicentennial指美国独立二百周年我刚做爱了I just had sex.伊森注意听你为何不早告诉我Ethan, focus. How could you not tell me?-你也没告诉我你真实年龄 -那不一样- You never tell me how old you are. - It's different.我撒的谎不会让我们在48个州获重罪My lie didn't make one of us a felon in 48 states.{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}美国法律规定与未成年人发生关系要判重罪-你到底在想什么 -我什么都没想- What were you thinking? - I wasn't thinking.-我只是忙于 -不要说- I was too busy falling... - Don't say it.爱上你...in love with you.-真的吗 -对不起- Really? - Sorry.好吧别再爱我了Well, fall out of it.你都不该在这你该在学校过夜的You shouldn't be here. It's a school night.天啊Oh, God.我就像是那种I'm like those women that you see...专门勾引小帅哥的女人...with shiny guys named Chad.我成了琼·柯琳斯I'm Joan Collins.{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}作风随便的英国性感女星谁Who?好安卓45分钟后就会到Ok. Andre should be there in about 45 minutes.就这样再见Alrighty. Bye-bye.这样省事多了It's just easier that way.说吧你昨晚的梦都告诉我了Come on. You told me about the last dream.不忘了吧No. Forget it.为什么难道是梦中的我对你过于粗鲁Why not? Was I doing something particularly saucy? 好吧我说All right. Fine.梦中不仅仅你在场You were not the only one there.乔伊也在场Joey was there too.好的All right.那Was there...还有其他人吗...anybody else there?-没有 -你确定没有人...- No. - You sure? Nobody...发发薄荷糖啥的... handing out mints or anything?没有只有我们三个No, it was just the three of us.说说看是你跟钱德勒做完So, tell me. Was it like you and Chandler,然后跟我做还是我们三个同时...and then you and me, or you, me and Chandler? -你知道吗 -什么- You know what? - What?有几次There were times...我都没有参与...when it wasn't even me.真甜蜜伙计们That is so sweet, you guys.莫妮卡伊森又来电话了Mon, Ethan called again.-莫妮卡 -莫妮卡- Mon? - Mon！-干嘛 -伊森又来电话了- What? - Ethan called again.-你不再见他了吗 -对- You're not seeing him anymore? - No.有时候有些问题无法解决Sometimes, things don't work out.这跟他需要假条才能翘掉体育课无关吗This has nothing to do with him needing a note to get out of gym?我没说什么都没说我发誓I, I didn't say any... I sw... I did not say anything. I swear.-他听到的 -听着下回见到他时- He stopped by. - Listen, next time you talk to him...能问问《恐龙战队》中最强的是谁吗...could you ask him which one the strongest Power Ranger is?{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}据日本同类型题材改编的美版恐龙战队我的生活真是太精彩了换个话题行吗Oh, my life is just so amusing. Can we drop it now?对不起Sorry.{\an3\fs16\bord0\fn微软雅黑\fad(0,0)\b0\pos(374,247)}恐龙战队台词墨菲时间到了"It's morphin'time."-暴龙 -剑龙- Stegosaurus. - Tyrannosaurus.我得走了I gotta go.天脑充血Head rush.再一次我真得走了One more, and then I have to go.酷Cool.你要上哪儿去Where you going?我要和几个同事去参加生日会I got a birthday party with some work people.同事吗没人跟我说Work people? Nobody told me.我知道这都是因为No, I know. That's part of the whole...他们不喜欢你所造成的...you know, them-not-liking-you extravaganza.你来说说我真不明白You know what, I don't get this.一个月前他们都是我朋友A month ago, these people were my friends.我当上了主管并不代表我会变成另一个人You know, just I'm in charge doesn't mean I'm a different person.那你今晚该来Well, then you should come tonight.和他们多相处You know, just hang out with them.让他们知道你还是个大好人Let them see what a great guy you still are.-你认为我该去 -真心的你该去- You think I should? - I really do. Yeah.-那好 -走吧- Ok. - Ok.我们能不一起去吗But could we not go together?我不想成为邀请上司的怪人I don't wanna be the geek who invited the boss.昨晚真是太棒了I think last night was great.我和崔西合唱了首《乌木与象牙》You know, the Karaoke thing. Tracy and I doing Ebony and Ivory. 你表现得很好You were great.但大家仍然取笑你But they still made fun of you.-什么 -你现在成了"假惺惺"老板- What? - You know, now you're more like, Mr. Caring Boss."套近乎"老板Mr. I'm-one-of-you Boss."称兄道弟"宾大老板Mr. I-wanna-be-your-buddy Boss Man Bing.我真是想不通Then I don't get it.你知道吗钱德勒你得面对现实You know what Chandler? I think you just gotta face it. 你坐在这间大办公室里You're like the guy in the big office.有权录取他们也有权开除他们You're the one that hires and fires them.-他们说你还是个好上司 -是吗- They still say you're a great boss. - They do?但是他们不再是你的朋友Uh uh. But they're not your friends anymore.-我只是想 -但你不能- I just want - But you can't.但我只是想But I just want你不是要去...Aren't you gonna?卡罗尔和我定了新暗号Carol and I have a new system.如果她打911If she punches in 9-1-1...就代表她将生产否则我就根本不理会it means she's having a baby. Otherwise, I just ignore it.那安卓呢What about Andre?早上他接到个电话Oh, well this morning he got a call from我觉得是表弟纳森打来的who I think was our cousin Nathan,老实说我知道太多内幕了and frankly, it was a little more than I needed to know.-嗨 -我本打算这么说的-Hi. - That was gonna be my opener.你们看过洗手间里的新烘手机没Hey, did you guys check out those new hand dryers in the bathroom? -我以为那只是谣传 -千真万确- I thought that was just a rumor. - True story.行了我得和你谈谈All right. Look, I gotta tell you something.我不是17岁I'm not 17.我这样说是为了让你觉得我可爱惹人怜I only said that so you'd think I was cute and vulnerable.其实我今年30I'm actually 30.娶了老婆有正经工作是个国会议员I have a wife and a job. I'm your congressman.莫妮卡这太荒谬了我们多般配Monica, this is ridiculous. We're great together.我们聊天说笑做爱也很协调We can talk, we make each other laugh, and the sex....我虽然经验不多但一切是那么完美I have no frame of reference, but I thought that was great. -的确是 -那问题在哪儿- It was. - Then what's the problem?伊森这太Ethan, it's....倒人胃口It's icky."倒人胃口""Icky"?就因为"倒人胃口"你就想放弃吗You're actually gonna throw this away because it's "icky"? 我也很难过我多希望情况不是这样This isn't easy for me either. I wish things were different.如果你年长几岁或者我年轻几岁If you were a few years older or I was a few years younger...或是我们生活在圣经时代...or we lived in biblical times...-我就可以... -不不要说- ...I could really - No, don't say it.爱你Love you.-你的手还没干是吧 -还是湿的- Are your hands still wet? - Moist.那我们再去烘一次Let's dry them again.或者是这些鸡尾酒"能"再烈一点吗Or like, "Could these margaritas be any stronger?" 你好钱德勒Hey, Chandler.你好宾先生Hello, Mr. Bing.你昨晚唱的史提夫·汪达那首歌真好听Loved your Stevie Wonder last night.谢谢听着有关周数据的事Thanks. Listen, about the weekly numbers,九点"之"前请送到我办公室来I'm gonna need them on my desk by 9:00.-好的 -没问题- Sure. - No problem.总得给他们些话题嘛You have to give them something.刚刚是格斯顿山托斯That was Gerston, Santos,留胡子的那个叫什么and who's the guy with the moustache? -派崔 -派崔对- Petrie. - Petrie. Right, okay.看来这周末得有人Well, some people are gonna be working... "加"班了...this weekend.真好Oh, that's nice.罗斯Ross.罗斯Ross.我在这里I'm here.你在吗You are?我们刚在We were just....什么What?-这下可好我有宝宝了 -什么- Great. Now I'm having a baby. - What?我要有宝宝了我要有一个I'm having a baby. I'm having a-电话电话在哪 -不在我这- The phone, the phone. - I don't have the phone.-罗斯 -我受伤了-Ross? - I'm hurt.莫妮卡快走各位快点她要生了Mon, Let's go. Come on, people. Woman in labor.罗斯看我这样子Ross, Look what I've got going here.坐车时再闹吧行不Save it for the cab. Ok?你在干什么我们要去医院What are you doing? We're going to a hospital.我不能打扮漂亮吗说不定有帅医生What, so I can't look nice? There might be doctors there. -乔伊别翻冰箱了 -好吧- Joey, get out of the fridge. - All right.-那是干嘛的 -路上吃的- What is that? - For the ride.-比如坐车的时候 -忍着- Like in a cab - Save it.-真讨厌 -莫妮卡快该走了- Hating this. - Monica, come on. Let's go.宝宝就要出世了Baby coming.我真不敢相信我要当姑姑了I can't believe I'm gonna be an aunt.-我要有侄子了 -真感人走吧- I'll have like a nephew. - That's nice. Get out. 行啦我在走我在走All right, I'm going. I'm going.走吧赶紧Here we go. Come on.。

-What you guys doing? -Monica's making us watch Old Yeller.Why are you guys upset? It's Old Yeller. It's a happy movie.-What? -What are you talking about?Come on. Happy family gets a dog.Frontier fun!Pheebs, what about the end?When Yeller saves the family and everyone's happy?That's not the end.That's when my mother would shut off the TV and say, "The end."What about when he has rabies?He doesn't have rabies. He has babies.That's what my mom said.I don't think she'd want you to see what's about to happen.Why? What's about to happen?I've never seen this part.Hey, Travis, what you doing with that gun?Oh, no.No, no, Travis, put down the gun.No, no, he's your buddy. He's your Yeller.No! The end! The end!Okay, what kind of a sick doggy snuff film is this?Okay, what kind of a sick doggy snuff film is this?Okay, what kind of a sick doggy snuff film is this?Have you guys eaten? Richard and l just finished, and we've got leftovers. Chicken and potatoes.What am I wearing?Actually, nothing but rubber gloves.One of these times, you'll really be naked and we won't come over.I got a leg, three breasts and a wing.How do you find clothes that fit?Hey, Monica? We got a question.All right, yes, I see other women in the shower at the gym.And no, I don't look.No, not that one.We're figuring out who to bring to the Nicks game.Ross can't go, so it's between my friend Eric Prower, who has breath issues... ...and Dan, with the poking. "Did you see that play?""You want more beer? Is that Spike Lee?"Why don't you ask Richard?Richard, if you had an extra ticket to the Nicks game......and you had to choose between a friend who smelled......and one who bruises you, who would you pick?Being a huge Nicks fan myself...... I think you should take someone who's a huge Nicks fan.That's Eric.Glad to be of help. Matches.I meant, why don't you take Richard to the game?What?-I don't know. -Come on!He keeps his fingers to himself, and he's always minty fresh.Richard's really nice. We just don't know him really well.Plus, he's older than some people.But younger than some buildings.So what, he's a little older. Big deal.He's important to me.If you ask him, he might take you in his Jag.How do we say yes......and make it seem like it's not just to ride in the cool car? Okay, this could be tough.We'll bring him, but only if he takes the Jaguar.You almost had it.No, no, you're fine. You're fine.Hi, honey.You are not gonna believe what happened!We were playing on the floor, and he grabs the table... ...and he pulls himself up!He pulled himself up!Standing man!I'm sorry you missed it, but I did tape it if you wanna see it. We know. He already did it last week.You can watch our tape if you want.See, I don't believe this. I missed the first time of everything. The first time he rolled over, the first time he crawled. What else? Has he spoken? Is he driving?Does he have a favorite liqueur?He is getting closer on the talking thing.He can't quite say "mama" yet, but once he said "Yemen."See, I don't know. I'm so sick of missing stuff.I want him for more than a day. I want him for a whole weekend. Listen. I feelThat would be great.Really? I had a whole speech prepared.Oh, shoot, that would've been fun.Did you just see that?Did you see? He just waved! He just waved!He's never waved before!Yes, he has. Very good.What you got there?Love Story, Brian's Song and Terms of Endearment.All you need now is The Killing Fields and guacamole, and you got a party!I talked to my grandma about the Old Yeller incident......and she said my mom used to not show us the ends of sad movies... ...to shield us from the pain and sadness.You know, before she killed herself.Where's Richard? Did you ditch him?After we stole his lunch money and gave him a wedgie.What's the matter? He's parking the car.-Did you guys have fun? -Your boyfriend is so cool.He let us drive his Jaguar. Joey for 12 blocks. Me for 15.He must like you best.What about when he tipped the guy who showed us to our seats?You never even saw the money.Hey, Chandler, thanks for showing us to our seats.You're welcome. Hey, Joey, thanks for parking the car.No problem.-Hey, Chandler -I think they get it.There's the man!Hey, you're getting better.I'm gonna keep this.He kept my dollar.Your first weekend without Ben. What are you doing?We're going to colonial Williamsburg.A woman I went to college with is the first female blacksmith there. They're a little behind the times in colonial Williamsburg.Look, I better go before Mommy starts weeping.-We love you. -Bye, Mommy.Have a good time.Look.Joey, do you know we can see you from here?How come Richard looks cooler with one of these?You may wanna light it and lose the spatula.It's cute, you trying to be more like Richard.Not like him, per se.Just not unlike him.It's the artist formerly known as Chandler.I'm just trying something here, you know?Why didn't you grow a mustache?We flipped for it.I got the cigar, he got the mustache.If we both grew them, we'd look like dorks.You really sidestepped that land mine.I promised Richard we'd meet him downstairs.You're meeting Richard?-Ranger game. -Didn't he tell you?He said he was going out with the guys. I didn't know that was you. You hear that?We're the guys!With that mustache, he reminds me of Aunt Sylvia.Thank you!Thank you!Hi. We're visiting.It's Ben and his dada.Can you say "dada"?I'm telling your mommies you said it, so you might as well.No luck, huh?A while ago, I got a "seh" out of him......which I thought might turn into "seh-condary caregiver," but.... Would you hold him for a sec? I gotta take this off.Sure. Okay.What are you doing?I'm holding Ben.He's a baby, not a bomb.Hold him like you'd hold a football.This is how I would hold a football.Here. Here. There we go.Sorry, I'm not very good with babies. I haven't been around them.I mean, you know, since I was one.-It's all right. No big deal. -Really?I'm sure you'll feel different when it's our baby.-What? -What?You think about stuff like that?Yeah. I mean....Actually, I kind of think that we'll have two babies.Two babies?You know, a boy and a girl.Hopefully, the girl will come first, so Ben won't feel competitive. Then what's gonna happen?We won't wanna raise kids in the city, so we'll move to Scarsdale. We'll be far enough from our parents so we don't have to see them... ... but close enough that they can baby-sit.And yes, I know the taxes are a little higher than Nassau County... ... but the school system's great.Wow, that's great! Great!Okay, wow! You know what?I'm off my break now.Here. You take this.I'm gonna go pour these very nice people some coffee.Look at that. I don't have a pot.I don't have a pot. Maybe I've got one at home.Or in Scarsdale. Hey, is that a door?Hey, Pheebs. What's happening?Murder, cancer, soccer teams eating each other in the Andes.So you watched the movies?What is happening to the world?I mean.... No, no, because E.T. Ieaves......and Rocky loses. Charlotte dies.Charlotte who?With the web. The spider.She dies. She has babies and dies.It's like, "Welcome home from the hospital." Thud!You wanna feel better?Here. Watch this.It's a Wonderful Life. I've heard of this.So you can't lose. It's there in the title.Wonderfulness is baked right in.I fell for that with Pride of the Yankees.I thought I'd see a film about Yankee pride.And boom! The guy gets Lou Gehrig's disease.The guy was Lou Gehrig. Didn't you kind of see it coming? Watch that. It'll restore all your faith in humanity.Hey, big guy. Game time.-Hey! Be right there! -There's a game?I just got my Pik-Up Stiks back from the shop.Bring your nerves of steel.It's the basketball playoffs.I appreciate this, but you don't have to hang out with them for me. They have each other.Oh, no, honey. I mean, don't worry.I like hanging out with them. They're different than my other friends. They don't start sentences with "You know who just died shoveling snow?" All right, that's great. Then just go.Go Nicks!It's the college playoffs.-Then, go Vassar! -They're not in it.Okay, then just go.Why does this bother me so much?I'm not one of those people who wants to spend 24 hours a day together. Sure.He just doesn't have much free time. What do I do?Does it matter? You'll just die or divorce or blow your pet's head off.Me too!Rachel, I got a question. Richard made plans again with the guysRoss made plans for the century.I'm gonna go read Cosmo. Maybe there's something helpful in it.If not, I can learn how to do a bikini wax with leftover Christmas candles. What happened back there?I don't know. You tell me.One minute I'm holding Ben, then I've got two kids...... I'm living in Scarsdale complaining about taxes!Well, I'm sorry. I think about stuff.You're at work, you're assembling bones, your mind wanders.You've planned out the next 20 years. We've dated for six weeks!You never think about our future?I think about whose apartment we'll sleep at tomorrow......and where we'll have dinner next Saturday!I do not think about our children's names!You know what our children's names will be?No, I mean, you know. I read a book, and there was a girl named Emily. And I thought that might be good.What book?The Big Book of Children's Names.Okay, listen.What we have is amazing.But I do not want everything decided for me!I spent my whole life like that.It's what I had with Barry. That's a reason I left.I like not knowing right now.Sorry if that scares you, but if you wanna be with me, deal with that!-Okay, fine! -Thank you!-We're not done! -I didn't know that.You're with a guy who won't stop planning his future with you.He knows we'll end up together.If that scares you, tough! You'll have to deal with that.-I will! -Good, because I love you!Oh, yeah? I love you too!-That's the first time we've said that! -Yes, it is!-I'm gonna kiss you! -You better!Thanks for the great movie tip.-Did you like it? -Oh, yeah.I don't know if I was happier when George Bailey destroyed the business... ...or Donna Reed cried or when the pharmacist made his ear bleed.I'll give you the ear thing, but wasn't the ending wonderful?I didn't watch it. I was too depressed.It kept getting worse! It should've been called:"It's a Sucky Life, And Just When You Think It Can't Suck Anymore, It Does!" IKick, save! And......denied!He gets it back. Pass to the middle, lines it up....Yes!Could that shot be any prettier?Man, you are incredible.We had a table in college.Really? I didn't know they had foosball in the 1800s.Nice mustache. At puberty, that thing will really kick in.Not to sound too Florence Henderson, but dinner's on the table.One more point.Score!Now can we go?That's why we don't let her play.Is everything all right?Don't be mad at him. It's our fault.I'm sorry we've been hogging his time.He's just really great to hang out with.-Well.... -No, seriously.We just talked about this. He is so much cooler than our dads.Our dads are okay and all, but Richard is justWhat are you kicking me for?I'm trying to talk here.You guys see me as a dad?-Oh, yeah! -No!You're just clearly not familiar with our young persons' vernacular. When we say "dad," we mean "buddy."We mean "pal."No, seriously. Joey's my dad.Monica's my dad.I've even got some dads down at work.That's fine.Well, your other dad and I are gonna go have a romantic evening. I'll just see you kids around.Nighty-night.You're not a dad!I can't believe you got us into trouble.So are you okay?Just...... I feel like I'm about a hundred.I thought I was just one of the guys.Come here.I'll make you feel like one of the guys.For a really cool guy, you suck at foosball.I was killing them.Yeah, well they suck too.You take the poopy diaper and put it in the poopy diaper pail. Calling it a "poopy diaper" doesn't make this process any cuter. -It's us. -Come on up.I'll get his stuff together.Okay, we can do this now, can't we, Ben?Yes, we can.Yes, we can.There! I did it!I did it!Look at that!It stays on and everything.I'm sorry. What did you just say? Did you just say "hi"?Oh, my God! Ross? Ben just said hi!-What? -Ben just said hi!What, the word "hi"?No, my Uncle Hi.Great! And I missed that too. I miss everything!Oh, I'm sorry. I guess I just bring it out in him.-Where is he? -We missed you.We missed you so much! Come here, Ben.Guess what? Ben just said his first word.What did he say?Something about hi.That's so exciting! Mommy's so proud of you!You know, actually, it's more like, hi!This could go on for a while.You're right. We've got a cab waiting.Well, this was fun.We should do it again sometime, Ben. What do you say?-All right, so I've got him...? -Tuesday.Bye, you guys.-Take care. -Bye, Ben.Did he just say "bye"?He said bye!You said bye! He said bye to me!Yes, he did!Suddenly I'm seeing him go off to college!We've gotta go. We've got that cab downstairs.See you later.Look at this nice deep hole I dug. Hey, Bert......isn't this a nice hole here?Ben, this is the part where Ernie buries Bert in the sand and can't find him. Now, I've looked ahead on the tape, and he does find him again.But before that happens, there's some rough going for a while.But I think we can handle it.And there's just the alphabet, but we know that ends well, so....Here we go.Bert? Bert?What happened to my friend Bert? He was here just a moment ago.Oh, no! My old friend Bert is lost.I'm so glad you're here.。

《老友记》-口语积累-第一季第二十集原剧摘录，非常地道的日常英语口语表达。

that is so sick：太恶心了look at once：一起看原句：No, don't everybody look at once! 不要一起看that's nice twice：你已经说了两次了put an end to it：中断某事原句：I will just put an end to it! （剧中指谈分手）creeps sb out：让某人毛骨悚然原句：It creeps me out!what kinda stuff：什么样的事情break off with sb：与某人分手原句：I'll just break it off with her.call back：回电原句：Why isn't she calling me back?how'd he take it：他表现如何slide over：回避原句：If it helps, I could slide over.jam packed schedule：排得很慢的行程表原句：I have a jam packed schedule, and I am late for keeping up with it. get my eyes scratched out by sb：接受某人的审视walk out with sb：与某人一块出去have pride：尊严原句：I have some pride！sitting for this：坐下来谈谈原句：We should really be sitting for this.Just pointing out the irony：支出讽刺之处Satan in a smock：衣冠禽兽原句：He's Satan in a smock! how needy is that：这有必要吗。