中式英语笑话
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中国人说英语笑哭老外,史上最尴尬对话!中式英语到底能有多尴尬1. 我在北京大街上被一票老外拦下来,问我where is the Heaven?我以为是传教的,我就说in your heart 老外都疯了……后来才知道他们在找天坛2. 本人当年刚来美帝,去星巴克点冰咖啡,想要吸管,大声问道:can I have a pipe? 服务员傻眼,答道:you are not in Netherlands...(pipe:管子,通常指抽大麻用的玻璃管)3. 外国人坐国航,有事叫来空姐。
空姐优雅端庄走过来面带微笑地问这位外国友人他遇到了什么困难——“what' s wrong with you?”(what’s wrong with you: 你有什么毛病?)4. 某女性朋友,小时候刚来美国没多久,参加高中的游泳课,一大帮子美国同学。
游得太差,不会自由泳和蛙泳,只会狗刨,故开始卖萌来化解尴尬:I cannot swim, but I'm very good at doggy style... 围观女生满脸鄙夷,围观男生满眼放光...(doggy style:老汉推车...)5. 在伦敦某公交站等车,来了个英国人。
问我:How long have you been here? 我还在想这人怎么感兴趣问我来英国多久了,就笑着回答说:About three years.他震惊了。
那一瞬间我忽然懂了,他是在问我在车站等车等多久了…你以为只有中国人能干出这事?Too young too simple.1. 一个西班牙老外学中文学疯了。
有天问他,最近看什么呢?他回答说:棋牌室。
后来想半天没想起来是什么剧叫这个。
后来才发现,他在看纸牌屋(House of cards)。
2. 一个老外两年前选了中文课,结果痛不欲生,感觉踏上了一条不归路。
中国人最常用的动词是什么,是HIT!我们来看一下中英对照:Make a call——打电话Type words——打字Get some water——打水Get a taxi——打车(打表,打表…)老外的内心:中国平时的生活,该有多么的暴力和刺激啊!!!关于学英语,少废话,先看一张图1. 是理想中最快的途径,一开始就知道路该怎么走。
中式英语对话闹出的笑话1. 你是来旅游江苏的吗?
- Yes,我是来旅游的江苏。
2. 你会泡茶吗?
- Yes,我会泡茶,但是我不会喝茶。
3. 今天天气真好,你想去哪里玩?
- Yes,我想去公园散步踢毽子。
4. 你读过小说《水浒传》吗?
- Yes,我读过,那是一部很经典的中西合璧的小说。
5. 你觉得这个菜好吃吗?
- Yes,这个菜真是好吃,味道很有少数民族的特色。
6. 你是想吃中餐还是西餐?
- Yes,我是想吃中餐,因为我很喜欢唐诗宋词。
7. 你觉得中国的汉字难学吗?
- Yes,我觉得汉字确实很难学,但是学会了很有成就感。
8. 你可以用中文介绍一下你自己吗?
- Yes,我叫张三,今年25岁,我是从美国来的留学生。
9. 你们那儿有什么好吃的美食吗?
- Yes,我们那儿有很多好吃的东西,比如说肉夹馍和炒饭。
10. 你对中国有什么印象?
- Yes,我觉得中国非常有文化底蕴,比如说昆曲和京剧。
20XX年关于中国式搞笑英语笑话在交际场合,能恰到好处地讲个笑话或自创一个幽默,不仅可以体现自己的语言水平,还可以提升个人魅力。
本文是关于中国式搞笑英语笑话,希望对大家有帮助!关于中国式搞笑英语笑话篇一we two who and who?咱俩谁跟谁阿how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你,怎么老是你?you don’t bird me,I don’t bird you你不鸟我,我也不鸟你you have seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers ! together up !你有种,我要给你点颜色瞧瞧,兄弟们,一起上!hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!!有事起奏,无事退朝you me you me彼此彼此1/ 5You Give Me Stop!!你给我站住!know is know noknow is noknowheart flower angry open心花怒放go past no mistake past走过路过,不要错过小明:I am sorry!老外:I am sorry too!小明:I am sorry three!老外:What are you sorry for?小明:I am sorry five!If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one!要钱没有,要命一条I call Li old big. toyear 25.笑死人不偿命的中国式英语笑话笑话大全我叫李老大,今年25。
you have two down son。
你有两下子。
as far as you go to die2/ 5有多远,死多远!!!!I give you face you don’’t wanna face,you lose you face ,I turn my face给你脸你不要脸,你丢脸,我翻脸关于中国式搞笑英语笑话篇二有次房东问我:“Did you eat anything yet?”我说:“no.”她听后重复了一遍:“So you didn’t eat anything.”我答道:“Yes...?”房东老太太犹豫了一下,又问:“Did you eat?”我又答道:“No.”她接着说:“So you didn’t eat……?”我说:“Yes...?”估计房东太太当时都快要崩溃了……关于中国式搞笑英语笑话篇三go and look!走着瞧good good study,day day up好好学习天天向上No Mao ze dong ,no new china没有毛没有新中国go a head! 去个头!People mountain peole sea!人山人海3/ 5give you some color see see!!给你点颜色看看no three no four 不三不四no money no women no good(哈,这是谁说的)we two who and who?我们俩谁跟谁dog day“"""s狗日的poor light egg穷光蛋if you tiger me ,i will mountain you如果你唬我我就煽你you don""""t bird me,I don""""t bird you你不鸟我我也不鸟你full clear ten big cool punishment满清十大酷刑love his mother who who who爱他妈谁谁谁KILL ONE POLICE *****杀一警百i s h i t love you我便爱上了你banana fish相交于f u c k do system操作系统horse horse tiger tiger马马虎虎fish yes于是your grandma""""s legs你奶奶个腿King eight egg***5 talks, 4 beauties 3 loves五讲四美三热爱4/ 5give me take down!给我拿下WATCH SISTER 表妹your grandma""""s bear你奶奶个熊yellow fly red黄飞鸿red face know to me红颜知己American Chinese not enough美中不足pig wood wolf house bee!珠慕朗玛峰You really have two down sons你真有两下子round son egg原子弹chicken gun ice机枪兵water sex poplar flower水性杨花How are you? 怎么是你?How old are you? 怎么老是你?5/ 5。
1. we two who and who?咱俩谁跟谁阿2.how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你,怎么老是你?3.you don't bird me,I don't bird you你不鸟我,我也不鸟你4.you have seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers !together你有种,我要给你点颜色瞧瞧,兄弟们,一起上!5. hello everybody! if you have something to say, then say! if you have nothing to say, go home!!有事起奏,无事退朝6.what is IMU3.0? it is a kind of chat tool!什么是IMU3.0?IMU3.0 是一种聊天工具!7. You Give Me Stop!!你给我站住!8. know is know noknow is noknow知之为知之,不知为不知…9. WATCH SISTER表妹10. IMU3.0 both can do what??? IMU3.0都能做什么???11. American Chinese not enough美中不足13. heart flower angry open心花怒放14. go past no mistake past走过路过,不要错过15.小明:I am sorry!老外:I am sorry too!小明:I am sorry three!老外:What are you sorry for?小明:I am sorry five!16. If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one!要钱没有,要命一条17. I call Li old big. toyear 25.我叫李老大,今年25。
50个经典搞笑中式英语最全搞笑中式英语大集合1.we two who and who?咱俩谁跟谁阿2.how are you ? how old are you? 怎么是你,怎么老是你?3.you don’t bird me,I don’t bird you 你不鸟我,我也不鸟你4.you have seed ,I will give you some color to see see 你有种,我要给你点颜色看看5.Government abuse chicken 宫暴鸡丁6.At KFC, We do Chichen Right 在肯德基,我们做鸡是对的7.You Give Me Stop! 你给我站住!8.Chop the strange fish 生鱼块9.watch sister 表妹10.take iron coffee 拿铁咖啡11.American Chinese not enough 美中不足12.Where cool where you stay!哪凉快上哪呆着13.heart flower angry open 心花怒放14.colour wolf 色狼15.dry goods 干货16.want money no; want life one! 要钱没有,要命一条17.People mountain and people sea. 人山人海18.you have two down son。
你有两下子。
19.let the horse come on 放马过来20.I give you face you don’t wanna face 给你脸你不要脸21.red face know me 红颜知己22.seven up eight down 七上八下23.no three no four 不三不四24.do morning 做早操;do class between 做课间操25.you try try see!你试试看!26.love who who 爱谁谁27.look through autumn water 望穿秋水28.go you mother's 去你妈29.May I borrow your light?借光30.Handsome Year, Morning Die 英年早逝31.dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse’son can make hole!龙生龙,凤生凤,老鼠的儿子会打洞32.morning three night four 朝三暮四33.king eight eggs 王八蛋34.no care three seven twenty one 不管三七二十一35.go and look 走着瞧36.poor light egg 穷光蛋37.ice snow clever 冰雪聪明38.first see you,i love you 第一次见你,我便爱上了你39.horse horse tiger tiger 马马虎虎40.no money no talk 没钱免谈41.hello everybody! if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!! 有事起奏,无事退朝42.you me you me 彼此彼此43.know is know,noknow is noknow 知之为知之,不知为不知... 44.watch sisiter 表妹45.American Chinese not enough 美中不足46.one car come one car go ,two car pengpeng,people die 车祸现场描述47.go past no mistake past 走过路过,不要错过48.小明:I am sorry! 老外:I am sorry too!小明:I am sorry three! 老外:What are you sorry for?小明:I am sorry five!49.If you want money,I have no; if you want life,I have one!要钱没有,要命一条50.I call Li old big. toyear 25. 我叫李老大,今年25。
关于中国人说英语的十个笑话-(韦博分享)关于中国人说英语的十个笑话-(韦博分享)1.刚上班不久,有个公司的A/R打电话来催支票,我循例问了一下他是哪间公司打来的,那男的很有礼貌的说:“This is xxx calling from Beach Brother." 听懂了很开心,不过由于对公司名字还不熟,心想先用笔记下来公司名,省得等下忘记了,正得意忘形之间,顺嘴开始拼写人家公司的名字,还说得一本正经:"b.i.t.c.h......bitch, correct?"。
那男的终于还是没能忍住怒火,近似于怒吼似的对我喊道:"NO!!! B.E.A.C.H.....BEACH!!!!!!"接下来的一年里,没再跟这间公司又过任何生意往来......汗2.我男朋友以前在温哥华乘skytrain的时候,一个白人女人说:I am sorry. 他直接说: you are welcome. 对方都呆了。
3.第一次跟老外去打painball,玩的是抢旗的那种。
由于第一次玩,一直跟着个看起来很专业的队友跑,一路上躲着子弹跑到对方的base. 我们人都挂了,对方就剩一个人在看老家。
就听那老外跟我说了一大堆术语,我也没听懂。
他看我没听懂就跟我说:it’s easy just cover me when i go out. 说完了就喊了一声cover me! 然后跑了出去,我也不懂他是让我掩护他,没等我想清楚他就跑了。
我就顺手从一个箱子上扯下来一块帆布,丢他头上,把他盖住了。
结果他就光荣牺牲了。
当时大部分人都挂了,在旁边观战。
所有人都笑趴了。
4.上次不知道是什么事情把我惹怒了,情急之下我本来要说: FUCK YOU!! 但是却说成FUCK ME!!! 那来外开始愣了一下, 后来他说: u wanna say fuck me ?? OR fuck you?? 晕...我连吵架的气势都没了.5.一个好朋友刚来加拿大,有一天口渴了想喝可乐。
[搞笑] 中式英语大全[搞笑] 中式英语大全[size=2]1. 爱他妈的谁谁谁:love he mother’s who who who2. 白痴:White eat!3. 板门弄斧:play an ax before Luban4. 班长:class long5. 彼此彼此:you me you me6. 表妹:watch sister7. 别唬我:don’t tiger me8. 不管三七二十一:no care three seven two ten one9. 不入虎穴,焉得虎子:Blue who say,and whose10. 不三不四:no three no four11. 不要开黄腔:do not open yellow gun12. 车祸现场描述:one car come,one car go ,two car peng-peng, people die13. 呈现强烈的企图心:Demonstrate the strong attempt heart14. 吃白食:eat white food15. 春江水暖鸭先知:spring river water warm duck first know16. 大人不计小人过:Big people do not think of smallpeople’s mistake17. 第一眼看到你,我就爱上你了:first eye see you, i shit love you18. 电源线:power line19. 放马过来,给你点颜色看看:release your horse and come, I’ll give you some color to see see20. 蜂拥而至:go out like bee21. 给你点颜色看看:I’ll show you some color22. 给你脸你不要脸,你丢脸,我翻脸:I give you face you don’t wanna face,you lose you face ,I turn my face23. 恭喜发财:go high try24. 狗娘养的:dog mother born25. 关公面前耍大刀:play a big knife before Guangong26. 好多人死了,你怎么不去死!:How many pople go to die, why do not you go to die27. 好好学习、天天向上:good good study, day day up28. 好久不见:long time no see (这个用法已经被当地的美国口语,尤其是被文化程度不高的群体所接受)29. 红颜知己:red face know me30. 加油:add oil31. 救人一命,胜造七级浮屠:save man one life, betther than building up 7-floor tower32. 开水:open water33. 看不看:see no see?34. 抗日游行:resist sun swim go35. 课间操:lesson between36. 老表:old watch37. 龙生龙,凤生凤,老鼠的儿子会打洞:dragon born dragon, chicken born chicken, mouse’s son can make hole38. 马马虎虎:horse horse tiger tiger39. 没脸见人:have no face see person40. 美中不足:American Chinese not enough41. 面试:face try42. 明天谁起得早谁叫谁:tomorrow morning who get up early, who call who!43. 哪凉快哪呆着去where cool where you stay!44. 你爱我吗:you love I?45. 你不鸟我,我也不鸟你:you don’t bird me, so I don’t bird you46. 你给我等着:you give me wait47. 你给我滚出去:you gave me get out48. 你给我记住:you give me remember49. 你给我站住:you give me stop50. 你没看,我现在非常忙,一边玩去:You no see, I nowvery busy. One side play go51. 你妻子真漂亮/哪里哪里:your wife is beautiful/where where52. 你去不去?你不去我去!:You go no go? You no go I go!53. 你认为你是谁?:What do you think ,who are you ?54. 你他妈的:you he mother’s55. 你问我,我去问谁:you ask me, me ask who56. 你丫要敢唬我,我他妈扇你!:IF you tiger me,I will mountain you!57. 你有两下子:you have two down son58. 你有种,我要给你点颜色瞧瞧,兄弟们,一起上:you have seed,I will give you some color to see see, brothers !together up !59. 你真有两下子:you really have tow down son60. 骑驴看唱本,走着瞧:riding a donkey reading play , go and see61. 七上八下:seven up eight down62. 亲爱的王小姐:dear wang little girl63. 請別碰行李:Please no touch the move the lee64. 青翠欲滴:It`s so green as will dropped65. 去你妈:go you mother66. 让世界充满爱:let's make love all over the world67. 人山人海:people mountain people sea68. 人之初,性本善:people first born, sex is kind69. 三人行,必有我师:three people go, one is my teacher70. 三心二意:three heart two meaning71. 色狼:colour wolf72. 生日快乐:birthday happy73. 上网:up net74. 上学:up school75. 胜败乃家常便饭:win lost milk house long poopoo rice76. 是不是:yes no yes77. 十全十美:ten all ten nice78. 十三点:ten three point79. 试试看:try try see80. 耍帅:play handsome81. 死猪不怕开水烫!:die pig not pa hot water tang!82. 谈朋友:talk friend83. 体壮如牛:body strong as a cow84. 万紫千红:ten thousand purple one thousand red (我在中国的某一个挂历中看到)85. 王八:king eight86. 王八蛋:wang eight eggs87. 望穿秋水:look through autumn water88. 王老五:wang old five89. 唯小人与女人难养也:only small people and women hard to feed90. 我的天呀!:my sky !91. 我服了你!:I follow you!92. 我感到很难过:I feel difficult to pass93. 我叫李老大,今年25:I call Li old big. toyear 2594. 我容易么我?:am I easy I?95. 我是大儿子:I am a big son96. 我是独一无二:I am olny one no two97. 我是流氓我怕谁:I’m a scamp, I’m afraid of whom98. 我是中国人:I am in China99. 我要给你点颜色看看:I will give you some color to see see (好像也被黑人群体最近所采用)100. 五讲、四美、三热爱:five talk, four beauty, three lover 101. 无钱无得:No money, no talk102. 笑里藏刀:A knife in the smile103. 心花怒放:heart flower angry open104. 眼看手勿动:look, see OK, no touch105. 要钱不给,要命有一条:want money no, want life one 106. 要钱还是要命:money or life?107. 一分耕耘一分收穫:EVEN GAME WIN , EVEN SO WHOLE108. 一见钟情:One look clock love109. 意思意思:meaning meaning110. 一言既出,驷马难追:one word is out, four horses cannot chase111. 一元复苏,万象更新:one dollar restart, ten thousand elephant update112. 远水解不了近渴:Far water car not save near thirsty113. 咱们兄弟谁跟谁啊:we brothers, who and who ah 114. 怎么老是你:how old are you?115. 怎么是你:how are you?116. 朝三暮四:morning three night four (感谢台湾卡通,好像这个用法在孩子们中开始流行)117. 这样也行?:this too good?118. 知之为知之,不知为不知:know is know,no know is no know119. 中国人民万岁:China people ten thousand year 120. 猪狗不如:PIG DOG BLUE121. 猪肉面条:pig noodle122. 猪头三,去死吧:pig 3 head,go dead!123. 走过路过,不要错过:go past no mistake past 124. 走着瞧:go and look!125. 钻石王老五:diamond wang old five126. 作早操:do early [/size]。
搞笑的中式英语段子中式英语,一种有趣的语言现象,是指中国人使用英语时出现的语法、用词、发音等方面的错误或变形。
这种语言现象在中国已经非常普遍,甚至成为一种文化现象。
以下是一些搞笑的中式英语段子。
1. 一位老师在考试时说:“Stop cheating, otherwise I will call your mom and dad to come here to watch.”(停止作弊,否则我会叫你们的父母来这里看着你们。
)这句话中的“watch”应该是“witness”。
2. 一位厨师在菜单上写:“Mrs. Sunflower soup”(太太向日葵汤),正确的应该是“Sunflower seed soup”。
3. 一位餐馆服务员问顾客:“Do you want Chinese chopsticks or English chopsticks?”(你想要中式筷子还是英式筷子?)筷子本来就是中式器具,所以应该是“wooden chopsticks”或“plastic chopsticks”。
4. 一位电视台主持人在节目中说:“I have a good news to tell you.”(我有一条好消息要告诉你们。
)正确的应该是“I have some good news to tell you.”。
5. 一位老师在课堂上说:“Everyone, please turn off your phone, or I will turn off your head.”(大家请把手机关掉,否则我会把你们的头关掉。
)正确的应该是“I will confiscate your phone.”。
6. 一位商店老板告诉顾客:“We have a very cheap price, onlyexpensive.”(我们的价格非常便宜,只有贵。
)正确的应该是“We havea very expensive price, only cheap.”7. 一位旅游导游在介绍景点时说:“This is the most beautiful view you can’t see in China.”(这是中国最美的景色,你们看不到。
中式英语的笑话(2010-07-19 21:54:17)转载标签:分类:学生习作杂谈Chinglish,即"中式英语"。
学习者在写作中往往先用汉语打腹稿,或列出中文提纲,再把汉语一句句机械地转换成英语,带有明显的汉语痕迹,因而不能被以英语为母语者所接受。
中式英语指带有中文语音、语法、词汇特色的英语,是一种洋泾浜语言。
中式英语在英语被称为“Chinglish”,是汉语及英语的英文混合而成的合体字。
请看下面有关中式英语的小笑话1.we two who and who!咱俩谁跟谁啊!2.how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你?怎么老是你?3.you have seed,I will give you some color to see see, brothers !together up !你有种,我要给你点颜色瞧瞧,兄弟们!一起上!4.as far as you go to die!有多远死多远!5.hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!!有事起奏,无事退朝!!6.you me you me彼此彼此7.You Give Me Stop!!你给我站住!!8.know is know ,noknow is noknow...知之为知之,不知为不知…9.WATCH SISTER表妹10.dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse’son can make hole!!龙生龙,凤生凤,老鼠的儿子会打洞!11..I give you face you don’t wanna face,you lose your face ,I turn my face 给你脸你不要脸,你丢脸,我翻脸12.one car come one car go ,two car pengpeng,people die车祸现场描述13.heart flower angry open心花怒放14.go past no mistake past走过路过,不要错过15.小明:I am sorry!老外:I am sorry too!小明:I am sorry three!老外:What are you sorry for?小明:I am sorry five!16.If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one!要钱没有,要命一条17.I call Li old big. toyear 25.我叫李老大,今年25。
18.you have two down son你有两下子。
19.好好学习,天天向上:good good study,day day up!20、Open the door see mountain开门见山21、five flowers eight doors五花八门22、people mountain people sea人山人海23、Un-ding-able顶不住了24、You go see see你去看看.25、Moon under old man月下老人26.many people die, no see you die.咁多人死唔见你死。
27.die away死开28.If you no three no four, I give you some color to see see!如果你不三不四,我给你点颜色看看。
29.Ask what ask! 问什么问!see what see 看什么看!laugh what laugh 笑什么笑!30.Have one leg with somebody. 跟某人有一腿。
31.What thing? 什么事?32.Two breasts. 二奶。
33.Pack two breasts. 包二奶。
34.watch uncle.表叔1:老师在黑板上写了一句:Time is money. 并让同学们翻译。
有名学生答道:“汤姆是玛丽。
”小明上英文课时跟老师说:May I go to the toilet?老师说:Go ahead.小明就坐了下来。
过了一会儿,小明又跟老师说:May I go to the toilet?老师说:Go ahead.小明又坐了下来。
他旁边的同学于是忍不住问:你不是跟老师说要上厕所吗?怎么不去?小明说:你没听老师说「去你个头」啊!2:江青会见外宾,要求翻译要严格按她的意思翻,不许走样。
外宾一见到江青,立刻拍马屁道:“Miss Jiang, you are very beautiful.“翻译照翻,江青心花怒放,嘴上还要谦虚一下:“哪里,哪里”。
翻译不敢怠慢,把江青的话翻成英文:“Where? Where?外宾一愣,还有这样的人,追问哪里漂亮的,干脆马屁拍到底:“Everywhere, everywhere.“翻译:“你到处都很漂亮。
”江青更高兴了,但总是要客气一下:“不见得,不见得”。
翻译赶紧翻成英文:“You are not allowed to see, you are not allowed to see.”3:话说某年某月的某一天,叁个神箭手约在一起比箭,目标是十尺外仆人头上的苹果。
A神箭手挽弓长射,咻一声,利箭正中苹果。
A高傲的昂起下巴,比出一根大拇指道:「I AM 后羿!」B神箭手照本宣科,射中苹果,这回他自大的喊了一句:「I AM 丘比特!」轮到C了,他也挽弓,利箭射出!结果正中仆人的心脏。
就听他结结巴巴好久才吐出句:「I...I...I...AM...SORRY...」4:一对热恋中的男女。
女生非常没有安全感,于是对着男友说:“SAY ‘I LOVE YOU!!’SAY IT! SAY IT! SAY IT!” 男的答道:“IT!”5:一位在美的留学生,想要考国际驾照。
在考试时因为过于紧张,看到地上标线是向左转。
他不放心的问道:Turn left?监考官回答: Right. 于是他立刻向右转……6:某人刻苦学习英语,终有小成。
一日上街不慎与一老外相撞,忙说:I am sorry.老外应道:I am sorry too.某人听后又道:I am sorry three.老外不解,问:What are you sorry for?某人无奈,道:I am sorry five.7:某男,亦粗通英文,至使馆,有表要填,有一栏是:*,该男思之久已,毅然下笔:“Once a week”。
签证官观后暴笑,曰:“This item should be filled in with male or female.”该男顿时赧颜,思之,填下“female”,官愣之,曰:“Shouldn’t it be male?”男急释曰:“I am a normal man, so I have * with female.8:上初一的时候,英语老师让我们读课文,恰好是一段对话,于是叫了一男一女两个同学来读。
男:What time is it now?女:It’s nine.男:Let’s go to bed.女:We go to bed at nine.全班绝倒。
9:一次为一个初中小孩搞家教,在其英语课本上发现如下恐怖字眼:爸死(bus)爷死( yes )哥死(girls)妹死(Miss)……死光(school)10. Adidas上个星期五我穿了一件 Adidas 的衣服去打球, 一个老美看到就笑我说, "Do you know what does it mean? It means All Day I Dream About *.我整天都在想著性, 缩写正好是 Adidas) " 我正惊讶他怎么反应这么快, 联想力这么丰富时,旁边的一个老美帮我解围, 他说, 有一个很著名的合唱团 Korn, 他们的招牌歌之一就是A.D.I.D.A.S, (All day I dream about *)所以呢,这个典故可是很多老美都耳熟能详的喔! 下次就换你去取笑老美了.11.我老公家是内蒙古农村的,有一对外国老夫妇到这里住了下来。
因为村里的人无法和他们交流,老夫妇很寂寞,就养了一只猫。
一天早上,老夫妇正梳理猫毛,一个人从旁边过来,冲着俩人说“鼓捣猫呢”。
夫妇俩随即冲着来人说:“Good morning.”傍晚时分,二人正在把晾在外边的衣服收起来,路过的一个村民冲着他们说:“鼓捣衣服呢!”二人这回反应很快说:“Good evening.”私下里老夫妇俩感叹,合着他们这里的人都会说英语呀!12.某次英文考试有两道题目:1)我穿上外套,却发现第一个扣子掉了。
2)他听见电话铃响,就过去接了电话。
正确答案应为:1)put on my coat and found its first button was gone.2)As soon as he heard the phone ringing, he went to pick itup.但是某生的答案是:1)*!2)Hello?13.一位来自日本的旅客,坐出租车去机场的路上,看到一辆汽车经过,就说:“oh,TOKOTA!Made in Japan! It is very fast!”又有一辆经过,他又说:“oh,NISSAN!Made in Japan! It is very fast!”司机有点不高兴,觉得他太吵了!当第三辆经过时,他还是说:“oh,HONDA!Made in Japan! It is very fast!”后来到了机场,那个日本人就问:“How Much?”出租车司机说:“1000!”日本人惊奇的问司机:“为什么那么贵?”出租车司机回答说:“oh,mileometer(计程表)!Made in Japan! It is very fast!”14.一天,我准备坐车去学校,正在路上走着,一辆车快速从我面前穿过,并且撞到一位正在观光的日本人。
当然情况很是吓人,路边的好心人立刻冲上前去问道:“How are you?”日本人上气不接下气的回答:“F..ine,th..ank you...and you?”围观的人顿时愣住。
由此可知日本人的英文是死记硬背的!15.小强去看电影,到了电影售票处,发现一个老外和售票小姐连说带比得好半天,就自告奋勇的上前做翻译,售票小姐说:麻烦你告诉她,现在坐票售完了只剩下站票,如果要看要站着看。
小强转头就对老外说:no sit see, stand see. if see stand see.老外回答说:Sorry I don’t understand your English.小强就对售票小姐说:哦,他说他不懂英文.....16.中国建设银行——CBC (Construction Bank of China)——“存不存?”中国银行——BC (Bank of China)——“不存。