剧本是谁嗯嗯在我的头上
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搞笑小品剧本《别怕有我在》范文(通用3篇)作文是经过人们的思想思考和语言组织,通过文字表达主题意义的一种叙事方式。
作文分为小学作文、中学作文和大学作文论文。
写作体裁包括:叙事性、说明文、实用性和议论文。
以下是为大家整理的关于搞笑小品剧本《别怕有我在》的文章3篇 ,欢迎品鉴!儿子:爸,你干什么呢?爸爸:我做饭呢儿子:搞啥啊爸爸:红烧肉儿子:红烧肉,我最香甜可口了爸爸:我特意给你做的儿子:爸,你看看,投档通知书爸爸:我太高兴了三姑:呀,你儿子考进大学了,你再也不必卖豆腐了,我真为你高兴爸爸:我太高兴了,啊儿子:三姑,我爸这就是咋了三姑:高兴死了儿子:我爸高兴死去了,我太难受了导演:停停停,怎么回事。
不是,你们是演员吗?这戏怎么演的,一点节奏感都没有,死尸不能演吗?编剧:你要出节奏感呐,有快有慢曲折嘛,这多快啊,快点,快点去一遍。
快点,快快慢儿子:爸,我回来了。
爸爸:你回去了儿子:爸,你干啥呢爸爸:我搞红烧肉呢儿子:做啥啊爸爸:红烧肉儿子:红烧肉,我最爱吃了,录取通知书爸爸:我太高兴了三姑:呀,你儿子考上大学了,你再也不用卖豆腐了爸爸:我太高兴了儿子:哎呀,三姑我爸这是咋了三姑:乐死了儿子:我爸死了,我太难受了编剧:不对,不对,不对。
这什么,这什么。
我都一看,我一搓眼睛没有了儿子:快嘛,导演,你不要节奏嘛,咱们这编剧:快一点,快一点,太快了,是不是,快的去,快的去爸爸:导演,这费工啊儿子:爸,我回去了爸爸:你回来了儿子:啊,爸,你干活啥呢爸爸:我做饭呢儿子:搞什么啊爸爸:红烧肉啊儿子:红烧肉啊,我最香甜可口了爸爸:我特意给你做的儿子:爸,你看看。
大学投档通知书爸爸:我太高兴了儿子,爸爸:哈哈,哈哈哈三姑:哎呀,你儿子考上大学了,你再也不用卖豆腐了儿子:三姑啊,我爸这是咋了三姑:你爸他高兴死去了儿子:我爸高兴死了,我忒难受了呀编剧:不像样不像样,干什么呢,这就是电影又不是电视剧,何况又不是偶像剧,你干什么呢,这就是爸爸:导演这不按你要求演的嘛,费了这么大劲编剧:做为演员节奏感,对了什么叫做节奏感,有快有慢。
本文部分内容来自网络整理,本司不为其真实性负责,如有异议或侵权请及时联系,本司将立即删除!== 本文为word格式,下载后可方便编辑和修改! ==小学生四人小品剧本,搞笑,by,discuz篇一:四人无厘头搞笑校园小品剧本四人无厘头搞笑校园小品剧本《教室里的那些事儿》A(拿着几本书打着呵欠一脸疲惫进场):这幸福的日子啊,就是吃饱了撑着去睡觉。
诶、还没上课,哥先睡会儿。
(书垫在桌子上睡)B(过了会儿,打着电话入场):啊?我说...你欠我的500万你丫到底还还不还的?啊?什么?那我今天最后一次警告你!你再不还!我就不要了!...(说完,将手机扔在课桌上) B(看着A,感慨)唉,老A就是老A,吃饱就睡,祝他在梦中一路走好,阿门!B(拿起手机):诶,给小丽打个电话...C(拖着把破拖把入场,对着观众说):我能想象老师在改我试卷时口吐白沫七窍流血的模样,也很难怪老师会罚我擦一个月地板...唉,我有时候就是搞不明白,学校怎么不请个清洁工人呢?这样在增加工作岗位之余,我们也能抓紧时间去泡妞嘛!熟话说:有妞不泡,大逆不道,见妞就泡,替天行道。
诶、怎么掌声就这么点儿啊?B:...我说小丽啊,总有一天你的名字会出现在我家的户口本上,趁着我们年轻把该干的坏事都干了吧,没几年啦!...C(开玩笑):哟,B哥在和美女打电话呢?听名字,不是昨天那个什么小梦啊!B:嘘...去去去,找屎是不?(连忙对着电话)....啊?不是不是,不是什么小梦,你听错啦!唉...你听我说....喂喂喂...(挂断)B:小C,哥跟你说多少次啦!不要在哥和MM...B&C:(C倒背如流)干柴烈火如狼似虎水深火热缠缠绵绵难舍难分饥寒交迫高歌猛进欲仙欲死的时候打扰哥...C:嘿嘿B:唉,你不知道,为了过光棍节,哥当了光棍,哥是一个传统的男人,所以一直支持三妻四妾制,小C啊,(拿出本儿《花花公子》)想看花花是不?古时,一剑闯荡天下;如今“一贱”放荡世界。
给各位理事鞠躬Bow to the board.就是这孩子This is the boy.在救济院出生然后去了教区农场Born here in the workhouse. Moved to the parish farm. 现年9岁已经到该回来的年纪了Nine years old today. Time to be moved back here.你叫什么孩子What's your name, boy?-奥利弗·忒斯特 -什么-Oliver Twist. -What?-那孩子是个傻子 -孩子听我说-That boy's a fool. -Boy. Listen to me.我想你知道自己是孤儿吧You know you are an orphan, I suppose.-你说什么 -这孩子是个傻子可能早就是了-What's that? -The boy is a fool. I thought he was.你知道你无父无母You know you've got no father or mother...由教会养大是吗...and that you were brought up by the parish, don't you? -是的先生 -你哭什么-Yes, sir. -What are you crying for?我希望你每天晚上都做祷告I hope you say your prayers every night.替那些养育你照顾你的人祈祷Pray for those that feed you and take care of you...像一个基♥督♥徒...Iike a Christian.-是的先生 -好吧-Yes, sir. -Well...你上这儿来是接受教育...you have come here to be educated...来学一门有用的手艺的...and to be taught a useful trade.这些东西放哪儿Here, where do you want these?跟你旁边的孩子学Learn from the boy next to you.-学什么先生 -学拣麻絮-What am I to learn, sir? -Learn to pick out the oakum.麻絮是什么先生What's oakum, sir?你哪儿来这么多问题Stop asking so many questions.麻絮是从旧绳子里面挑出来的纤维Oakum's the fibers you unpick from the old rope.能再次用在女王陛下的船上Then it's used again for the ships of Her Majesty's navy.你是在为国效力You're serving your country.好了干活吧Now, get on with it.汤姆歇一歇好不好我们还要睡觉呢Tom, give it a rest, will you? We're trying to sleep.-睡不着太饿了 -我们都饿-Can't sleep, too hungry. -We're all hungry.是的但我怕Yes, but I'm frightened.怕为什么Frightened? Why?什么什么Why? Why?我太饿了我怕把旁边的小子吃了I'm so hungry, I'm frightened I might eat the lad that sleeps next to me. 主啊O Lord God...感谢你赐予我们...for the blessing of this generous and bountiful meal...如此丰盛的食物...that thou hast placed before us...感谢您的慷慨阿门...we give thanks. Amen.阿门Amen.对不起先生我还要一点Please, sir. I want some more.什么What?对不起先生我还要Please, sir, I want some more.快把执事找来Fetch the beadle!尼姆金斯先生Mr. Limbkins.请原谅先生I beg your pardon, sir.奥利弗·忒斯特还想要Oliver Twist has asked for more.还要For more?!镇静邦布尔先生清楚地回答我Compose yourself, Mr. Bumble, and answer me distinctly.你是说他吃了他的晚餐之后还要Do I understand that he asked for more after he had eaten his supper? 是的先生He did, sir.那孩子以后准会被绞死That boy will be hanged."5镑一个孩--""Five pounds and a b--"我说"哇"那就是"哇"When I says "whoa," I means "whoa"!"健健康的"Health-- Healthy...学学徒...appren-- apprentice.5镑"Five pounds."扫烟囱是个脏活Chimney sweeping is a nasty trade.以前有小孩在烟囱里面憋死的Young boys have been smothered in chimneys before now.那是因为要他们下来可还没有点火That's because they damp the straw afore they light it in the chimney... 他们就把稻草弄湿了湿的稻草会生烟...to make them come out again. Damp straw makes smoke.烟会让孩子睡着他们还巴不得呢Smoke sends a boy to sleep, and that's what he wants.小孩子都很懒的Boys is very lazy, gentlemen.但一团火就能让他们上杆子跑出来没有比这个更灵的了But there's nothing like a good hot blaze to make them come out in a run. 而且很人道It's humane too. Yes.即使他们粘在烟囱上了Because even if they've stuck in the chimney...脚板一热他们就得赶紧下来...roasting their feet makes them struggle to extricate theirselves.是啊Yes.我想他喜欢扫烟囱这个活儿的吧I suppose he's fond of chimney sweeping?没错大人He dotes on it, Your Worship.好吧那我就要签契约了Very well. I will sign the indentures...把他签给...to make him Mr....甘菲尔先生做学徒Mr. Gamfield's apprentice.孩子My boy.孩子你脸色苍白又惊慌失措My boy, you look pale and alarmed.出什么事了What's the matter?求求您先生求求您先生Please, sir. Please, sir.怎么了孩子What is it, my boy?-别 -够了-Don't.... -Now then.别别Don't.... Don't....说吧孩子别什么Go on, my boy. Don't what?求您别让这个可怕的人把我带走先生Please don't send me away with this dreadful man, sir.阴险狡猾的孤儿我见得多了Of all the designing orphans that I've ever seen....-闭嘴执事 -你是在跟我说话吗大人-Hold your tongue, beadle. -Did Your Worship speak to me?是的闭嘴Yes, hold your tongue.不不行No. No, out of the question.我拒绝签这张契约We refuse to sanction these indentures.把这孩子带走Take the boy away.好好待他And treat him kindly.看来他需要善待He seems to want it.我已经给昨晚去世的两位女士量好了尺寸I've just taken the measure of the two women that died last night. 你要发财了苏尔伯雷先生You'll make your fortune, Mr. Sowerberry.您这么认为吗Think so?理事会出的价钱太少啦The prices allowed by the board are very small.棺材不也不大吗So are the coffins.顺便问一下你知不知道有谁想找个仆童By the by, you don't know anybody who wants a boy, do you?报酬很可观苏尔伯雷先生很可观Liberal terms, Mr. Sowerberry. Liberal terms.现在你要见你的新师♥傅♥了Now, as you are to meet your new master...把帽子拉起来...pull that cap off your eyes.头抬起来"先生"Hold your head up, sir.把眼睛擦干"先生"Dry your eyes, sir.-是你吗邦布尔 -不会是别人苏尔伯雷先生-ls that you, Bumble? -No one else, Mr. Sowerberry.我把那个孤儿带来了奥利弗·忒斯特I've brought the orphan, Oliver Twist.那么说他是那个孤儿So this is the orphan, is it?苏尔伯雷太太Mrs. Sowerberry...能不能请你过来一下亲爱的...will you have the goodness to come here a moment, my dear? 奥利弗·忒斯特Oliver Twist.孤儿怎么会有名字How comes an orphan to have any name at all?-我给起的 -你邦布尔先生-I invented it. -You, Mr. Bumble?我苏尔伯雷先生I, Mr. Sowerberry.我按字母顺序给这些孤儿起名字I name all our foundlings in alphabetical order.最后一个是SThe last was S.我给起了斯瓦布尔Swubble, I named him.这个是T 我给起了忒斯特This was a T. Twist, I named him.下一个是恩文Next one as comes will be Unwin...再下一个是维金斯...and the next, Vilkins.我把整个字母表的名字都准备好了一直到ZI've got names ready all through the alphabet, right up to Z.哎呀你可是个大文豪呢先生Why, you're quite a literary character, sir.嗯嗯Well, well...-没准就是呢 -苏尔伯雷太太-...perhaps I may be. -Mrs. Sowerberry...这是救济院的孤儿...this is the orphan from the workhouse.天哪他可真瘦小Dear me, he's very small.但他会长大的苏尔伯雷太太会长大的But he'll grow, Mrs. Sowerberry. He'll grow.是啊在我这里吃的好喝得好我敢说他肯定会的Yes, I daresay he will. On our food and drink.救济院的孩子吃得都比一般孩子多Workhouse boys always cost more to keep than they're worth.到楼下去瘦皮猴Get downstairs, you bag of bones.夏洛特Here, Charlotte...把我们给狗准备的冷饭给这孩子...give this boy some of the cold bits that were put by for the dog. 我猜你不会介意睡在棺材旁边You don't mind sleeping among the coffins, I suppose.你介意不介意都一样Well, it doesn't much matter whether you do or don't...没别的地方给你睡...for you can't sleep anywhere else.开门Open the door, will you?-你是新来的小子 -是的先生-You the new boy? -Yes, sir.-你多大了 -10岁先生-How old are you? -Ten, sir.我进来后要好好教训你一顿救济院的小子Then I'll whop you one when I get in, you workhouse brat.请问先生是您敲门的吗I beg your pardon, sir. Did you knock?是我踢的I kicked.您要买♥♥棺材吗先生Did you want a coffin, sir?-我猜你不知道我是谁 -不知道先生-You don't know who I am, I suppose. -No, sir.我是诺亚·克雷波尔先生你归我管Well, I'm Mr. Noah Claypole. And you're under me.现在把窗板关上Now, take down the shutters.我从师♥傅♥的早餐里给你留了点熏肉Saved a nice little bit of bacon for you from the master's breakfast. 到角落去吃动作快点In the corner with you. And be quick about it.他们等你看铺子呢听到了吗They'll want you to mind the shop. Do you hear?没听到吗救济院的到角落里去Do you hear, Workhouse? In the corner.老天啊诺亚别管这孩子了Oh, Lord, Noah, let the boy alone.别管他Let him alone?谁愿意管他了Why, everybody's let him alone.他的爸爸妈妈所有的亲戚都不管他了His mother, father and all his relations has let him alone.所有他需要有人来管了So he needs someone who don't.晚餐Supper.奥利弗你还没做完吗Oliver, ain't you done yet?我还从来没见过这么没用的孩子到楼下去I've never known such an idle boy. Get down them stairs.苏尔伯雷先生Mr. Sowerberry...进晚餐了...supper.-我有个想法亲爱的 -想法-I've had a thought, my dear. -Had a thought?那你要小心了苏尔伯雷先生你会得脑膜炎的You want to be careful, Mr. Sowerberry, you'll get brain fever.-是关于小忒斯特的 -他怎么了-It's about young Twist. -What about him?-一个很好看的孩子 -当然啦他吃得可不少-A very good-looking boy. -He will be. He eats enough.他脸上有一种忧伤的表情亲爱的There's an expression of melancholy in his face, my dear.他能成为一个出色的送殡人亲爱的He would make a delightful mute, my love.我--我不是说参加成人葬礼的一般送殡人I-- I don't mean a regular mute to attend grown-up funerals, my dear... 是儿童出殡的...but only for children's practice.看看他Look at him.看看他Look at him.救济院的小鬼头看啊A workhouse boy and a sneak. Look at him.记住我的话他会被绞死的Mark my words, I'll see him hung.不用多久Can't be too soon.救济院的你妈妈呢Workhouse, how's your mother?她死了She's dead.怎么死的What'd she die of, Workhouse?你要哭了吗救济院的You gonna cry, Workhouse?-什么事让你哭的 -不是你-What set you off? -Not you.-不是我 -不是你-Not me, eh? -No, not you.你最好别说我妈妈的事And you better not say anything about my mother. 最好Better not?你妈妈的事About your mother?我很抱歉我很可怜你Well, I'm very sorry, and I pity you very much.但你必须知道救济院的But you must know, Workhouse...你妈妈准不是个好东西...your mother was a regular right-down bad one. -你说什么 -你妈妈不是个好东西-What did you say? -A regular right-down bad one. 她死得正是时候It's a good thing she died when she did...不然的话她准是在做苦工或是被流放了...or she'd be hard laboring or transported.要么就是被绞死了这个可能性最大是吗救济院的Or hung. Which is most likely, isn't it, Workhouse? 救命啊夏洛特太太Help, Mrs. Charlotte!他要杀了我了救命啊He'll murder me. Help!救命走开Help. Get off!老天啊帮帮我For God's sake, help me!太太他要杀了我My missus, he's murdering me!-走开走开 -把他拉开夏洛特-Get off. Get off me now! -Get him, Charlotte.把他拉到外面去快Get him now. Go out with him. Come on.-救济院的魔鬼 -我要教训教训你-Workhouse devil. -I'll learn you!-你这个小坏蛋 -把门打开夏洛特-You brat! -Get the door, Charlotte.把他仍进去In with him. In.太凶残了先生Very violent indeed, sir.太太说And the missus said...如果邦布尔先生能拨冗...if Mr. Bumble can spare the time...就可以来教训他了...then Mr. Bumble's to flog him...因为师♥傅♥出去了...because the master's out.-在这里面 -奥利弗-ln there. -Oliver?让我出去Let me out of here!-听到我说话吗奥利弗 -听到了-Do you know this here voice, Oliver? -Yes.你不怕吗Ain't you afraid of it, sir?听到我的说话你不打颤吗Ain't you trembling while I speak, sir?不No!-他准是疯了 -不是疯了是肉-He must be mad. -It's not madness, ma'am, it's meat. -肉 -肉太太肉-Meat? -Meat, ma'am, meat.你给他吃得太多了You've overfed him.如果你一直给他喝粥的话就不会有这种事情了If you'd kept this boy on gruel, this would never have happened.天哪真是好心没好报Dear, dear. This comes of being liberal.到底是怎么回事情What's all this?奥利弗·忒斯特突然发狂了苏尔伯雷先生Oliver Twist has turned violent, Mr. Sowerberry.看他把我的眼睛打的先生Look what he's done to my eye, sir.你呀你呀Now then. Now then.-你是个好孩子不是吗 -他侮辱我的妈妈-You're a nice young fellow, ain't you? -He called my mother names. 要是他死了怎么办你这个忘恩负义的家伙Well, and what if he did, you little ungrateful wretch!她活该报应还不够呢She deserved what he said and worse.-不是的 -是的-She didn't! -She did!你说谎It's a lie!别干站着了苏尔伯雷先生他说我扯谎呢Do something, Mr. Sowerberry. He called me a liar.别干站着了Do something!对不起小姐I beg your pardon, miss...您能不能好心...but would you be so kind--?滚远点Get off my land.我不欢迎乞丐滚I don't want no beggars here. Go on!滚要不我就放狗了Get off! Or I'll put the dog on you!我没有多少就这点也够救你的小命了I haven't much, but you're more than welcome to it.当心点烫的Be careful, it's hot.一看到你我的心就一抽Seeing you gave me such a turn.我眼睛不好使了但My eyes ain't what they were. But...我一时把你...I just thought for a moment....你这么小怎么一个人出门Why are you on the road at all, a little mite like you? -你要去哪儿 -伦敦夫人-Where are you headed? -London, ma'am.伦敦London?伦敦London.哦天哪天哪Dear, oh, dear, oh, dear.你好小哥Hello, my man.你这是怎么了And what's your game?你不住附近吧You're not from these parts?打哪儿来的Where you from, then?我已经走了7天了I've been walking. Seven days.7天啊Seven days? Cor.我猜你想吃东西吧I expect you want grub?保准你能吃到And you shall have it.我现在手头也有点紧I'm at a low-water mark meself just at the moment... 但我会想办法的...but I'll fork out and stump.来吧站起来Come on, up with you, on your pins.这些不会再出来了吧And these won't get out again?非常感谢Thank you very much.哦顺便说一下Oh, by the by...我叫杰克·道金斯大家都叫我机灵鬼...my name is Jack Dawkins, better known as the Artful Dodger. 奥利弗·忒斯特Oliver Twist.你为什么叫机灵鬼Why are you known as the Artful Dodger?这就是原因That's why.有住的地方吗Got any lodgings?钱呢Money?看来今晚你要找地方睡觉了是吗I suppose you want someplace to sleep tonight, don't you?蝾螈Baby newt.蝾螈 4便士一个Buy a baby newt, 4 pennies.你走这么远不是铁嘴的命令吧I expect you walking for so long was a beak's order.-铁嘴是什么 -你不知道铁嘴是什么-What does that mean? -Don't you know what a beak is?-是鸟嘴吗 -啊你还真是个雏儿-A bird's mouth, isn't it? -Cor, you are green.铁嘴就是治安推事你到底是哪儿人啊A beak's a magistrate, my son. Where you been all your life?你给我滚开Get off me, you!你自找的活该That's it, you asked for it.回来啊我有话对你说Come back here. I wanna talk to you.我告诉你伙计我来的那个地方--from where I am, mate, I'm telling you.回家Go home!放开Get off of that!回家去Go back home!-喂 -李子满贯[口令]-Now then. -Plummy and slam.-有两个人那个是谁 -新来的-There's two of you. Who's he? -A new pal.-他打哪儿来 -没听说的地方-Where'd he come from? -Greenland.-老头在吗 -在楼上挑手帕呢-ls the old one there? -Upstairs, sorting the wipes.就是他费金我的新朋友奥利弗·忒斯特This is him, Fagin. My new friend, Oliver Twist.好啊好啊奥利弗·忒斯特Well, well, Oliver Twist.希望能有幸进一步跟你交朋友I hope I have the honor of a more intimate acquaintance.我们非常高兴见到你奥利弗非常We're very glad to see you, Oliver. Very.机灵鬼把香肠拿下来Dodger, take off the sausages...给奥利弗腾个地方出来...and let's make a space at the table for Oliver.你看的是手帕亲爱的You were staring at the pocket handkerchiefs, eh, my dear?不少吧There's a good many of them, ain't there?我们准备挑出来洗一洗We've just looked them out, ready for the wash.就这么回事亲爱的That's all, my dear.吹一下Blow it.烫的吹一下Hot. Blow it.奥利弗你得喝一杯Now then, Oliver, what you must have...热杜松子酒加水暖暖身子...is a hot gin and water. Warms the cockles.快点喝另一位先生还等着用杯子呢Only, drink it quick because another of these gentlemen wants the tumbler.他是个好孩子He's such a nice lad.我有种感觉他会是把好手的I have a feeling he'll turn out a hard worker.是啊是把好手Yeah, a hard worker.奥利弗Oliver?奥利弗Oliver?聪明狗Clever dogs.聪明的小狗Clever dogs.好家伙Fine fellows.都是好家伙All fine fellows.好家伙Fine fellows.好家伙Fine fellows.好家伙Fine fellows.好家伙Fine fellows.你干吗监视我你怎么会醒着的What do you watch me for? Why are you awake? 你看见什么了说啊孩子What have you seen? Speak out, boy!快说否则要你命Quick. Quick, or it's your life!我再也睡不着了先生I wasn't able to sleep any longer, sir.如果打扰了您我非常抱歉I'm very sorry if I disturbed you.-刚才你没醒吧 -没有先生-You were not awake a moment ago? -No, sir.-真的吗 -真的先生-You sure? -Yes, sir.你当然是睡着了我知道的宝贝儿Of course you were asleep, my dear. I know that.我只是想吓吓你I only tried to frighten you.你是个勇敢的孩子奥利弗You're a brave boy, Oliver.你看见那些漂亮的玩意儿了吗宝贝儿Did you see any of those pretty things, my dear?看见了先生Yes, sir.那些They....那些都是我的奥利弗我的一点可怜的财产They're mine, Oliver. My little property.是我养老用的For my old age.这是我们的小秘密It's our secret.-明白了吗宝贝儿 -明白了先生-You understand, my dear? -Yes, sir.我现在可以起来了吗先生Can I go up now, sir?起来吧Now....我希望你们早上没偷懒宝贝们I hope you've been at work this morning, my dears. -可卖♥♥力了 -尽心尽力-Hard. -As nails.好孩子Good boys.好孩子Good boys.-给我看看你有些什么机灵鬼 -几个皮夹子-What you got, Dodger? -Couple of pocketbooks.-高档吗 -还不错-Lined? -Pretty well.好啊Yeah.机灵鬼Dodge.我不知道机灵鬼I don't know, Dodge.嗯Well...好像有点轻...not as heavy as they might be...但很干净...but very neat...做工也不错...and nicely made.真是个机灵鬼是吗奥利弗Ingenious workman, ain't he, Oliver?是的先生Indeed, sir.查理你呢宝贝儿And, Charley, what have you got, my dear?-小手巾儿 -小手巾儿-Wipes. -Wipes?货色不错They're very good ones.很不错Very.这个标记做得不好You haven't marked them well.得用针挑出来我们--The marks should be picked out with a needle. And we'll--我们教奥利弗怎么做We'll teach Oliver how to do it.-可以吗奥利弗 -请吧先生-Shall us, Oliver? -lf you please, sir.你愿意跟查理·贝茨一样做手帕是这样吗You'd like to make handkerchiefs as easy as Charley Bates, wouldn't you? 非常乐意如果您教我的话先生Very much indeed, if you'll teach me, sir.我还没见过这么嫩的雏儿I've never met anyone so green.好了孩子们Now then, boys...开始吧...the game.我们教奥利弗We'll show Oliver...如何做手帕...how to make pocket handkerchiefs.你愿意玩游戏吗You'd like to play a game, wouldn't you?是的先生Yes, sir.-几点了老爹 -现在是-Got the time, guv? -It's...8点...8:00.-在玩游戏吗费金 -老一套了亲爱的-Playing the game, were we, Fagin? -As is our custom, my dear. -他是新来的吧叫什么 -他叫奥利弗-He's new. Who's he? -Oh, this is Oliver.奥利弗Oliver...这俩位是好朋友贝特和南希...these are our very good friends Bet and Nancy.看见了吗机灵鬼你得好好跟他学学See, Dodger, you wanna learn from him.他多有礼貌啊一位真正的绅士He's got manners, he has. A proper gentleman.外面太冷了所以我们才进来We popped in because we were that cold inside.随时欢迎亲爱的As is your custom, my dear.-查理 -来吧奥利弗坐这儿来-Charley. -Come on, Oliver. Join us.还是说你不愿意跟普通人坐一块儿Or don't you sit with the common folk?你得多加小心奥利弗Now, you wanna be careful of this lot, Oliver.-他们会教你 -教他挑标记-They'll have you picking-- -Picking out the marks.我们教的就是这个奥利弗是吗Just what we was teaching him, ain't it, Oliver, my dear?-是的先生 -"是的先生"-Yes, sir. -"Yes, sir"?你知道是对谁在说话吧You know who you're talking to, do you?你到这儿来你妈妈会怎么说What's your mother got to say about you being here?我没有妈妈我是孤儿I haven't got a mother. I'm an orphan.那你就来对地方了You're in the right company, then.来吧奥利弗我来教你怎么玩Come on, Oliver, I'll teach you how to play.这叫做"偷机"It's called Spec or Speculation.每人三张牌他翻过来的那张Three cards each, and then the one he turns up... 就是王牌...is trumps.这种日子是不是很快活啊宝贝儿This is a pleasant life, ain't it, my dear?-我什么时候可以出去呢 -快了快了-When can I go out, sir? -Soon. Soon.我们Let's--来看看你都学会了什么Let's see what you've learned.-喜欢吗 -喜欢先生-Would you like that? -Oh, yes, sir.看你能不能在我不注意的情况下See if you can take this out...把它拿出来...without my feeling it.拿走了吗Is it gone?你真是个聪明的孩子宝贝儿You're a clever boy, my dear.我还没见过更聪明的I never saw a sharper lad.这是一个先令拿去吧Here's a shilling for you.跟机灵鬼还有查理学着点Make the Dodger and Charley your models.特别是机灵鬼宝贝儿Especially the Dodger, my dear.他会是个大人物的你也会He'll be a great man himself, make you one too. 你就这么下去You go on this way...会成为了不起的大人物...you'll be the greatest man of the time.非常感谢先生Thank you very much, sir.漂亮的苹果来看看漂亮的苹果Lovely white apples. Get your lovely apples. 来啊本市最大的卷心菜Biggest cabbages in town. Come on.你是说那个宽边的You mean that one with the wide rim?太贵了Too expensive.小偷你的手帕先生Thief! Your handkerchief, sir.拦住他小偷Stop, thief!拦住他Stop!小偷Thief!-你是个贼 -抓住他-You're a thief! -Get him!-抓住他 -抓住那个男孩-Stop him! -Stop that boy!小偷Thief!抓住他小偷Stop, thief!小偷Thief!抓住他Stop him!抓住他Stop him!小心Mind out.抓住他Stop, thief!那边在那边There, over there.那边That way!-抓住他小偷抓住他 -小偷-Stop, thief! Stop! -Thief!-你叫什么 -让他透口气-What's your name, boy? -Give him some air.他吓死了He's scared to death.-那位先生呢 -先生来了-Where's the gentleman? -Here's the gentleman now.-是这个孩子吗 -恐怕是的-ls this the boy, sir? -Yes, I'm afraid it is.回答得真妙啊"恐怕是的"That's a good one. Did you hear him, "afraid it is"?-可怜的家伙自己受伤了 -是的是我♥干♥的先生-Poor fellow's hurt himself. -Yeah, I did that, sir.关节打到了他嘴上可我拦下他了Hurt me knuckle against his mouth. But I stopped him.-起来 -不是我先生不是我-Get up! -lt wasn't me, sir. It wasn't me.当然不是小偷都这么说Of course it wasn't. It never is.-起来 -别伤了他-Now get up. -Don't hurt him.不先生我不会的Oh, no, sir, I won't hurt him.-下一个 -这是我的姓名和地址先生-What's next? -That is my name and address, sir.警官这家伙是谁Officer, who is this fellow?-我叫布朗罗 -闭嘴-My name is Brownlow. -Hold your tongue.警官这家伙犯了什么罪Officer, what's this fellow charged with?哦不不是他大人Oh, no, no. He's not charged, Your Worship.他是来指控这个孩子的He appears against the boy.-让他发誓 -在我发誓之前-Swear him. -Before I am sworn...-我必须进上一言 -闭嘴先生-...I must beg to say one word. -Hold your tongue, sir.-我不先生 -即刻闭嘴-I will not, sir! -Hold your tongue this instant.你是个鲁莽无礼的家伙You're an insolent, impertinent fellow.-你竟敢辱骂推事 -什么-How dare you bully a magistrate. -What?让他发誓我不想听他废话了让他发誓Swear this person. I'll not hear another word. Swear him."我郑重发誓所言皆为事实上帝作证""l do solemnly swear to tell the whole truth, so help me God."-你指控这孩子什么 -我正在书店-What's the charge against the boy? -I was at a bookstore when-- 闭嘴警♥察♥呢Hold your tongue! Where's the policeman?警官怎么回事情有证人吗Policeman, what is this? Are there any witnesses?-没有大人 -这孩子在生病-None, Your Worship. -The boy is ill.是的恐怕如此Oh, yes, I daresay.过来小乞丐别在这里耍花样Come along, you vagabond. None of your tricks here.你叫什么What's your name?你叫什么你这个顽固的无赖What's your name, you hardened scoundrel?-警官他叫什么名字 -你叫什么孩子-Officer, what's his name? -What's your name, boy?水给我水Some water. Some water.他的名字叫萨姆·沃特斯大人He says his name is Sam Waters, Your Worship.-你住哪儿 -你住哪儿-Where does he live? -Where do you live?-没固定的地方大人 -废话-Anywhere he can, Your Worship. -Stuff and nonsense.别耍我Don't try to make a fool out of me.不我想他真的是病了大人No, I think he really is ill, Your Worship.我比你清楚否则我就不姓方I know better, or my name's not Fang.站到旁边去他在装死Stand away, officer. He's shamming.即席判决他劳役三个月He stands committed for three months.退庭Hard labor, of course. Clear the office.别别别带走他Stop. Stop, stop! Don't take him away.怎么回事这人是谁把他赶出去What is this? Who is this? Turn this man out.-退庭 -我不出去我有话要说-Clear the office. -I will not be turned out! I will speak!我都看见了我是书店老板I saw it all. I own the bookshop.-我要作证 -你有什么要说的-I demand to be heard. -What have you got to say?-不是那个孩子 -不是那个孩子那是谁-lt was not this boy. -Not this boy? Who was it, then?在那位先生看书的时候偷他东西的是另外两个小孩The robbery was committed by two others while the man was reading. 我看见了看见这孩子都吓呆了I saw it done. I saw that this boy was perfectly amazed by it.你为什么不早来Why didn't you come before?-没人帮我看铺子 -你说看书-I hadn't a soul to mind the shop. -Reading, you say?那么说有书了A book, I suppose.是的就攥在他手上呢Yes, the very one he has in his hand.天哪我把这事给忘了Oh, dear me, I forgot all about it.好啊你也是个好人啊Well, you're a nice one.指控无辜的孩子To prefer a charge against an innocent boy.我猜你是在一种极为可疑I consider, sir, that you've obtained that book...极不光彩的情况下取得这本书的...under very suspicious and disreputable circumstances. -该死 -店主-Damn me! -Bookseller...你要指控他吗...do you want to press charges against him?-当然不 -好吧-Certainly not. -Well...你是不是觉得挺幸运的...think yourself fortunate...书的主人拒绝指控你...that the owner of the book declines to prosecute.对这孩子的指控取消The boy is discharged.-退庭 -岂有此理-Clear the office. -Damn me.退庭退庭Clear the office! Clear the office!下一个案子Next case.来啊走先生走起来先生Come on. Move along, sir, please. Just move along, sir.真是位好心人先生There's a good gentleman, sir.等等哈里我帮你一把Hold on, Harry. I'll give you a hand.小心脚下楼梯Mind that step. Just mind that step there.让一让路先生Make way for the law, sir.-小心小心点 -他看上去年纪很小-Careful. Careful with him. -He seems very young too.帮我叫辆马车Call a coach, pray.-好的马上先生 -抱歉-Yeah, right away, sir. -I'm sorry.可怜的孩子Poor boy.-小心夫人 -谢谢你先生-Mind yourself, madam. -Thank you, sir.-车来了先生 -谢谢警官-Got one, sir. -Thank you, officer.我来吧先生Let me, sir.好了There we go.-能搭我一程吗先生 -当然可以-Will you drop me off, sir? -Of course.好吧All right.请帮忙抬一下他的头先生If you could just take his head, sir.-去哪儿 -本顿维尔-Where to, sir? -Pentonville.-本顿维尔 -是的-Pentonville. -Yes.回答我他去哪儿了Answer me! Where is he?回答我他去哪儿了Answer me! Where is he?那孩子怎么样了说啊要不我掐死你What's become of the boy? Speak out, or I'll throttle you! 条子抓走了放开我The traps have got him! Let go of me, will you?!大牛Bullseye!谁扔的谁往我头上扔的Who pitched this here at me? Who done it?大牛进来你这鬼鬼祟祟的家伙Bullseye. Come in, you sneaking warmint.待在外面不进来干吗What you stopping outside for?趴下Lay down.怎么了费金又虐待这些孩子了What you up to, Fagin? Ill-treating the boys again?我奇怪他们怎么还没杀了你如果换了是我早动手了A wonder they don't murder you. I would, if I was them. 别这么大声你似乎不高兴比尔Don't speak so loud. You seem out of sorts, Bill.给我杯喝的小心别下毒药Give us a drink. And mind you don't poison it.查理。
相声剧本台词《酒壮英雄胆》相声,是以说笑话或滑稽问答引起观众发笑的曲艺形式。
它是由宋代的“像生”演变而来的。
甲:新年好。
乙:新年好。
甲:(手在鼻子前做扇风动作)好大的酒气,喝酒啦?乙:是喝了点。
甲:明知道今天有演出,你怎么还能喝酒呢?乙:唉!头一次来到这么大的舞台演出,面对这么多热情的观众,心里紧张,所以喝点酒壮壮胆,中国不是有句俗话吗?叫酒壮狗熊胆。
甲:是酒壮英~雄胆!乙:对对,是狗~壮英雄胆。
甲:酒~壮英雄胆!乙:反正就那么个意思吧。
甲:什么什么乱七八糟的!乙:说起这个喝酒啊,我还真有点研究。
甲:哦?你怎么有研究了?乙:我发现啊,这每个人和每个人和喝醉之后的反应都不一样。
甲:是吗?那都有什么区别呢?乙:有些人啊,他喝多了之后话多甲:是有这样的。
乙:犹如黄河泛滥、滔滔不绝、一发而不可收拾!甲:够邪乎的!乙:还有的人那,喝多了之后他爱唱歌。
甲:怎么唱的?乙:黑猫警长、黑猫警长、你真了不起,五行的大山、压不住你——哦伤心的太平洋——甲:唱串啦!在说这调也不对啊!乙:还有的人啊,他喝多了之后爱哭甲:也有这样的。
乙:嗯嗯嗯嗯嗯!嗯嗯嗯嗯嗯!甲:哭的够伤心的,没准是失恋了!乙:记得上次你老婆跟别人跑了,你就是这么哭的。
甲:你老婆才跟别人跑了呢,我压根就没老婆!乙:哦,你没老婆。
甲:女朋友都没有!乙:那是我记错啦?甲:肯定记错啦!乙:哦,那好吧。
甲:什么玩意啊!乙:还有的人啊,喝多了之后他爱笑。
甲:你在给学学?乙:他笑起来这味:哼,哼哼,哼哼(突然对着甲放大嗓门)哈哈哈哈哈哈!甲:什么毛病这是?吓我一跳!乙:有一种人啊,喝多了之后反应是最不好的!甲:是哪种呢?乙:耍酒疯的!喝多了之后他摔盘子砸碗是打媳妇骂孩子,耍混蛋!甲:是够混蛋的。
这有不好的,那有没有反应比较好的呢?乙:也有啊。
甲:哦?那你在说说是哪种?乙:喝完之后就睡觉的。
甲:这到省的惹事。
乙:喝完了往床上一躺,一条腿在床上一条腿在床下耷拉着,脖子往后一仰,把眼睛一闭还眯着个小缝。
大班《是谁嗯嗯在我的头上》教案大班《是谁嗯嗯在我的头上》教案1活动目标:1、感受故事内容中的乐趣,体验阅读和想象所带来的快乐。
2、培养幼儿细致的观察力及语言表达能力。
3、熟悉故事内容,了解不同动物的嗯嗯是不一样的,并能用语言进行描述。
活动准备:多媒体课件活动重难点:活动重点:感知故事内容,阅读的快乐。
活动难点:直到各种动物粪便的特点,并会用语言进行描述。
活动过程:1、讲出故事名称?提问你什么时候会嗯嗯?导入课题。
2、师分部分讲述故事(从开始到猪先生)。
(1)从开头到小鼹鼠气得大叫。
看看小鼹鼠是什么表情?我们来学一学小鼹鼠的动作。
他的心情如何?为什么小鼹鼠的视力不好?(2)从鸽子到猪先生。
“叭”,鸽子的嗯嗯是什么样的?还溅到了小鼹鼠的腿上!师:鸽子的嗯嗯湿湿的、黏黏的!马的嗯嗯象什么?是什么样的呢?野兔的嗯嗯是什么样的?你们听到野兔嗯嗯掉下来的声音吗?(哒哒哒哒……)山羊的嗯嗯在哪里?你们发现它是什么颜色的?山羊的嗯嗯是什么样的与兔子的有什么不同?奶牛的嗯嗯是什么样的?小鼹鼠在哪里?为什么躲在这儿呢?为什么小鼹鼠一看就知道不是奶牛的?小鼹鼠又问谁啦?画面很有意思,这是猪头,这是猪屁股,小鼹鼠做了一个什么动作?为什么要这样呢?后来它又去问谁?它有没有找到是谁嗯嗯在它头上?(3)从苍蝇到知道是狗大便。
为什么小鼹鼠问苍蝇,到底是谁嗯嗯在我的头上,它怎么会知道呢?(4)从狗大便到结束。
终于找到答案了,你猜小鼹鼠会怎么做呢?它为什么呲溜一下赶紧钻回地下呢?3、完整看课件,了解故事内容。
师:这本书真有趣,它让我们知道了这些动物的嗯嗯是什么样的,还让我们知道嗯嗯时要去厕所。
4、游戏:连线(1)这是谁的粪便连线(2)动物们的粪便是什么样的连线(幼儿用语言描述)。
5、讲评:每种动物他的粪便都是不一样的,请小朋友做个有心人,关注生活中的趣事,你就会发现更多的秘密,更多的乐趣。
大班《是谁嗯嗯在我的头上》教案2活动目标:1、熟悉故事内容,了解不同动物的嗯嗯是不一样的,并能用语言进行描述。
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大学生心理剧本《我是谁》角色:小夏张甜甜王琳于晓梅程界王志远谢晖旁白:匆匆忙忙,过去一年了,我的生活也发生了好多变化,激烈的或是不易察觉的,但是,我相信真正可以纪念的大学生活才刚刚开始!对于我而言,大学就像是一个迷迷茫茫的浓雾森林,我要一点点地穿过这片森林,看到清晰而又美丽的场景!情景一(天气转凉,一个灰茫茫的下午,小夏和王琳起床在宿舍里面洗刷)小夏:下午,干什么呢?王琳:这还用问,当然是去找他了!(傻傻笑着)小夏:奥(有些难过)(说好了,和我一块去逛街的,又忘了!算了吧,毕竟男朋友是重要的,谁让她喜欢呢!)王琳:怎么了?你下午干什么?会不会有不知名的帅哥约你呀!小夏(开心一笑):傻子呀,你看我像吗!我可是个爱学习的好娃呀,平常不和男生打交道的!王琳(坏坏一笑):你?小夏:怎么,不像吗?张甜甜(伸伸懒腰起床了):刚又做了个美梦呀,哈哈哈哈这也太怪了吧!(小夏和王琳瞧望她)问:什么梦呀张甜甜(傻傻笑笑):太怪了,太离奇了,太小夏:哎呦喂,别再太太太了,姐呀,拜托你快说吧!张甜甜(笑了笑,淡淡而又甜美):我梦见我在上高中,还被老师批评了一顿,最后,我们班班长还来安慰我!(起床,看着小夏们),其实,我好想回到高中呀,那里,我有很多关心我的朋友,我有很多表扬我的老师,还有好多好多充实的回忆,而大学(环境冷静着,似乎有种气氛压抑着她们)旁白:(是呀,大学了,没有像高中时那种人与人之间亲密接触的学习环境了,上了大学,每个人,或多或少都会有些怀念高中,那种温馨,那种充实,还有那里老师的负责人!可是,我们长大了!)王琳:(着急)现在几点了?张甜甜:快6点了!王琳:啊?这么快呀,我走了啊要不就迟到了,和他约好了!走了啊(挥了挥手,走出了宿舍!)小夏:去吃饭吗?张甜甜:奥,不吃了,我省钱呢!小夏:那我去吃饭了?张甜甜:好吧!小夏(对张甜甜笑了笑,挥挥手)走了奥!演员数:5人(3女2男),舞蹈人员视情况而定人物:1、荷花:女,17岁。
校园爱情剧本导读:本文校园爱情剧本,仅供参考,如果觉得很不错,欢迎点评和分享。
校园爱情剧本(一)开头:男主人公在上网,右下角的QQ图像闪烁,是她的图像,他小心翼翼打开对话框。
女:嗨,现在怎么样,还好吗?男:"不,一点也不好,. 我感到很孤独,我想你了、很想很想、现在我常常会梦到你还在我身边的时候、你…还能回到我身边吗?【把打好的全删掉】嗯、还不错!你那?女:我也还好,记得开心哦。
男:你也是,要开心…(屏幕渐渐朦胧,画面切换到两个人相识的那一天)字幕显示:说实话,当我们第一次相见的时候,我并没想到,你在我心里会变得如此重要(暴雨前的天空,很是明亮,陈宇凡独自一人上了公交车,路人甲旁边恰好有个座位,座位上放着一把伞。
)陈宇凡:同学,旁边座位有人么?路人甲:(专心玩着手机,估计是在看小说)噢,没人,你坐吧。
(把腿拿出来侧在一边让座,丝毫没注意自己的伞还在座位上)陈宇凡:谢谢。
(很自然坐了上去,将伞挤到右侧,也没注意那把伞的存在)场景一(几分钟后,天空下起了暴雨)陈宇凡:唉,怎么那么倒霉,本来以为不会下雨的,好端端的天空怎么突然下起了大雨,没带伞啊……怎么办,怎么办,真主安拉,上帝耶稣,曾哥,你一定要帮我啊,曾哥!!!(心里语言)动作,表情痛苦,略带夸张,手无意识的按在座位上,"咦,有把伞,不会是旁边那个人的吧,应该不是,要是的话他早就把伞拿过去了。
"(窃喜)。
陈宇凡到站,下车,很自然的拿起伞,路人甲没注意,还在专心看小说。
就在陈宇凡准备下车时,他注意到旁边一位女生没带伞。
陈宇凡:同学,你没伞啊,要不要我带你,别紧张,我不是什么好人。
(很快,意识到说错话),不是坏人安琪:(抿嘴,腼腆笑)呵呵,谢谢了(一起下车,共撑一把伞躲到对面屋檐下)(陈宇凡下车后,路人甲才意识到伞在座位旁,右手去拿伞(拿伞是眼睛还在盯手机屏幕),发现尽然不见了,看看车窗外,正是刚刚坐在旁边的男一拿走了自己的伞,可是,车已经开走。
大学生心理话剧剧本范文(5篇)【篇1】大学生心理话剧剧本吴艾:(坚定)嗯嗯,妈妈已经决定要去武汉抗击疫情了,明天就走。
赵尤韦:(激动)不行,武汉太危险了,你不能去武汉,不能!(紧张地看向吴爱)吴艾:(无奈)妈妈是医生,救死扶伤是妈妈的职责,现在武汉需要我,我必须去。
妈妈知道你担心我,但妈妈一定答应你我会平安回来,好吗?妈妈已经跟楼下王姨打好招呼了,你以后遇到什么问题跟她讲,她会帮助你的。
来,先把钱收下。
(赵尤韦直直的盯着吴艾,没有收钱的打算)吴艾:(将钱放在桌子上)害,你这孩子。
(无奈、心疼)(慢慢地走到门口,停下回头看赵尤韦后,含泪将门关上)关上门,赵尤韦盯着放在桌上的钱,迟疑几秒后赵尤韦:(故作不关心)去吧去吧,反正我也不重要,没有你我也一样能过得很好。
(说完继续打游戏)第四幕:两个月后,吴艾躺在病床打着吊针,鼻子里插着呼吸管,困难地翻看手中的文件。
突然,旁边电话响起。
画面一:吴艾:喂,哪位?(困难地起身拿起手机)陈芒:是赵尤韦妈妈吗?我是赵尤韦的班主任陈忙。
吴艾:哦,我是。
是赵尤韦又做错什么事了吗?(担心)陈芒:是这样的,我最近查看那个网课的观看记录,发现赵尤韦至今为止没有听过一节课,希望你能够及时的督促赵有为听课,最好能够观看课程直播回放把之前落下的课给补回来。
吴艾:好的,麻烦老师了,我会叮嘱他的。
陈忙:嗯嗯行,我还有事先挂了。
(随后吴艾拨打赵尤韦电话)画面二:赵尤韦坐在电脑前全身心地打游戏,房间内一片狼藉。
旁边的电话声响起一阵等到游戏结束后才接通电话。
赵尤韦:(拿起手机,不耐烦)谁啊?一直打电话给我干嘛?吴艾:(语气激动)是我,是妈妈。
最近在家里怎么样啊?吃的好不好?穿的暖不暖?如果吃的不够了,就跟王姨讲,想吃什么就让她给你送过来。
(语气平和,认真)对了,刚刚陈老师打电话给我了,说你没有听过一节网课。
你现在高三了,马上就要高考了,高考是一件很重要的事情,妈妈不希望你把时间荒废在游戏上,妈妈希望你能好好学习考上一个好大学,你能答应妈妈吗?赵尤韦:(语气强烈)我一个人在家能过的有多好啊,别老问这问那的,烦死了!要是真这么担心我的话,你就回来啊!还有,我玩游戏关你什么事啊,你连我都不管,管我的学习干嘛?吴艾:(眼角含泪,声音弱弱地)对不起啊,儿子,是妈妈不好,妈妈没有陪在你身边,等疫情结束妈妈一定回来陪你。
中学生小品剧本篇一:初中生校园小品剧本初中生校园小品剧本《见网友》2男3女1桌4椅(咖啡店,一女坐于台上看报)(二男上)小明:我给你说的一会你千万别忘了小强:忘不了忘不了,我一会就走,走了之后打电话叫你回去是吧,这点事,noproblem 小明:好嘞,到了,就是这里小强:哪个是你约的女网友?小明:这里面不就一个人吗,我们有暗号的,我去问问。
嗯嗯,别看我只是一只羊(女看了看他)小明:别看我只是一只羊(女转身继续看报)小明:别看我只是一只羊女:我说哥们,你就会这一句你在这得瑟什么啊?这年头真是什么人都有,就这一句,你自己就不烦啊?神经病(女下)小强:这就是暗号?小明:昂。
小强:这么诡异的暗号。
小明:坐下等等吧,看来她还没来呢。
(二女上)小红:哎呀到了到了,人家突然好害羞啊小雪:行了行了,别在这装矜持,这里没人,快进去吧小强:别看我只是一只羊小红:啊啊啊他来了他来了小雪:嗯?谁来了?小红:这是我们的暗号,嗯嗯,羊儿的聪明难以想象小强:这人有病吧,我唱歌呢她接什么词啊。
小明:哎哎,是我是我,别看我只是一只羊小红:羊儿的聪明难以想象小明:懒洋洋小红:灰太郎?额,呵呵小明:呵呵呵呵小强:呵呵什么啊,下坐下行么。
哎,你叫什么名字啊小红:啊,我叫小红小强:哦,我叫小强小红:哦,你好,你好小强:哦,对了,这是我朋友,小明,哎这个跟你一起来的是你朋友啊?小红:对对,她叫小雪小强:你好你好小雪:嗯好小强:你们俩一个班的?小红:嗯,是啊小强:哇,你们班美女真多啊小红:哈哈,哪有哪有小强:你和小明在网上认识的?小红:是啊,以前连照片都没看过呢小强:哦,怪不得呢,呵呵小红:啊?小雪:那个,小红,我有点事,我先走了昂,小红:哎,哎,你等会等会小强:好的,好的,路上慢点啊,(小雪下)小红,你哪个系的啊?小红:额,我是教育系的(小明拉过小强,示意小强快走)小强:哦哦哦,对对,怎么忘了,小明你去买点饮料吧,小红你喝什么?小红:柠檬奶茶就好(小明苦视小强)小强:你没带钱吗?算了算了我去买吧(小强下)小明(苦找话题):额,小红啊,那个,那个小红:什么啊?小明:那个,那个,今天天气不错啊小红:啊,是啊小明:那个,那个,你今天中午吃的什么啊?小红:吃的寿司啊小明:那个,那个,你会打dota么?小红:额。
剧本:是谁嗯嗯在我的头上
大三班
人物:鼹鼠鸽子马野兔山羊奶牛猪两只苍蝇大狗
道具:各种嗯嗯、小动物服装
场景布置:小鼹鼠的窝大树等
开场:
旁白:在一个美丽如画的树林里,住着一群可爱的小动物,当早晨的第一缕阳光照耀在树梢上的时候,小动物们快乐的一天便开始了,瞧,一只小鼹鼠睡醒了。
鼹鼠:“哇!今天的天气真好!”(从鼹鼠窝里钻出来,伸懒腰,开心地说。
)
(音乐起,小鼹鼠蹦蹦跳跳地扭动着身体,小鼹鼠在舞台上跑一圈,然后趴回窝里,把便便放在头上. 音乐停)
场景1:小鼹鼠出场
旁白:突然,有一坨嗯嗯从天而降,正好落在小鼹鼠的头上。
(播放音效)
小鼹鼠:(趴出窝,一个激灵,抖抖身体,伸手摸了摸头,看了一眼做恶心状,然后又闻了一下手,立马双手插腰,气得大叫):“搞什么嘛!是谁嗯嗯在我头上?”,
(然后开始气冲冲地东张西望:手指头顶,跺着脚,很气愤的样子。
音乐停)
场景2:鸽子出场
旁白:这时,一只鸽子唱着歌从天空飞过。
【播放音乐《我是一只小小鸟》】
小鸽子:(舞动着翅膀,配合音乐跳着欢快地舞蹈。
慢慢地舞到舞台中央。
音乐停)
小鼹鼠:(用手指着自己的头顶):“小鸽子,是不是你嗯嗯在我的头上?”
小鸽子:(看了看小鼹鼠头上的嗯嗯,立刻扇动翅膀做难闻状,捂着鼻子大声地说):“咦,好臭啊!那才不是我的嗯嗯呢,我的嗯嗯是这样的”。
(边说边走到草坪后面翘起屁股发出比较夸张的“嗯嗯”声,然后从草坪后面捧出一些白色湿黏液体):“你看,我的嗯嗯是粘粘的、白色的,像酸奶一样的,味道还很好闻呢!”
小鼹鼠:(后倾身体,看了看鸽子的嗯嗯,捏着鼻子退后几步):“鸽子小姐,错怪你了,真是对不起!”,
鸽子:(美美地端起嗯嗯放在舞台前,迈着轻快的舞步下场了。
)
场景3:大马上场
旁白:小鼹鼠不死心,继续仔细寻找,这时一匹大马蹄哒蹄哒地走了过来。
(马叫声开始时,大马出场)
大马:(蹄哒蹄哒地跑上场,边跑边不停地做着各种搞笑动作,慢慢地跺入舞台中央。
音乐停)
鼹鼠:(气愤地):“马先生,是不是你嗯嗯在我的头上?”
大马:(停下来看了一眼鼹鼠头上的嗯嗯,摇摇头、撇撇嘴很不
屑地):“这个小嗯嗯可不是我拉的,我的个子这么高大,我的嗯嗯像大大的、大大的咖啡球!”
边说边扭着屁股摇着尾巴发出夸张大声的“嗯嗯”声后,从草坪后面捧出托盘里面装有几个拳头大的咖啡色的大球。
鼹鼠:连接摆手说:“好大好臭的嗯嗯啊,真得不是你!”
鼹鼠:(摇着头有点失望):“马先生,对不起”
大马:(把嗯嗯放在舞台前,大马蹦蹦跳跳地跑下了场。
)
场景4:野兔出场
旁白:这时,一只野兔从草丛中跳了出来。
野兔:(音乐起,野兔跳着舞出场)
鼹鼠:野兔,是不是你把嗯嗯拉在我的头上?
野兔:(连连摆手)不是我,我的嗯嗯是这样的。
野兔跳到草坪后面,从草坪后面捧出托盘里面装有十几个花生米一样的嗯嗯。
野兔:你看,我的嗯嗯像小小的豆子。
鼹鼠:对不起,野兔,我错怪你了。
野兔:(把嗯嗯放在舞台前,蹦跳着下场。
)
场景5:羊出场
旁白:小鼹鼠走得有些累了,突然听到了几声羊叫,小鼹鼠一下子又来了精神。
(羊叫声音响起时,小羊出场)
小羊:(刚睡醒,正揉着眼睛打着哈欠,发出羊“咩、咩”的叫声,然后开始迈动悠闲地舞步,跟着音乐跳起舞来,边舞边向舞台中央走去。
)
小鼹鼠:羊小姐:是不是你嗯嗯在我头上的?
羊:那才不是我的嗯嗯呢,我的嗯嗯像咖啡豆一样,还有青草的香味呢!
(小羊走到草坪后面,扭过屁股发出夸张细长的“嗯嗯”声后,捧出一些褐色的球)
小鼹鼠:不是你,对不起!”
小羊把嗯嗯放在舞台前,扭着模特步下场了!
场景6:奶牛出场
音乐起,奶牛跳舞出场。
小鼹鼠:奶牛小姐,是不是你嗯嗯在我的头上?
奶牛:不是我,我的嗯嗯是这样的。
(奶牛走到草坪后面,捧出一坨嗯嗯。
)
奶牛:你看,我的嗯嗯是这样的。
小鼹鼠:好臭,对不起,我错怪你了。
奶牛把嗯嗯放在舞台前,扭着模特步下场了!
场景7:小猪出场
音乐起,小猪跳着舞出场。
小鼹鼠:猪小姐,是不是你嗯嗯在我的头上?
猪:不是我,我的嗯嗯是这样的。
(小猪走到草坪后面,捧出一坨嗯嗯。
)
小猪:你看,我的嗯嗯是这样的。
小猪:好臭,对不起,我错怪你了。
小猪把嗯嗯放在舞台前,下场了!
场景8:苍蝇出场
旁白:小鼹鼠有点泄气了,这个嗯嗯在自己头上的家伙实在难找啊,这时太阳已高高地升起,小鼹鼠又累又饿,趴倒在草地上,这时飞来了两只小苍蝇!
苍蝇之歌
我们是苍蝇,我们是苍蝇!
我们是可爱的小苍蝇!
我们飞来嗡嗡,我们飞去嗡嗡!
我们喜欢粪便,我们热爱茅坑!
(苍蝇嗡嗡声起,小苍蝇出场)
小鼹鼠:“哈哈,我总算知道谁可以帮我啦!”,
小鼹鼠接着走近苍蝇说:“苍蝇,能我帮我检查一下是谁嗯嗯在我头上吗?”
小苍蝇们说:“问我嗯嗯啊,这个我最在行啦,你乖乖坐好,我试试就知道了!”,
苍蝇热情的戳了一下他头上的嗯嗯,仔细的嗅了嗅又尝了尝,立刻说:“嗯,真美味啊,哈哈!太简单了,这是一坨狗大便‘!”
小鼹鼠激动拉着小苍蝇的手说:“太谢谢你啦”
小苍蝇:没关系的,不用谢
苍蝇跳着舞飞下了场。
场景9:大狗出场
旁白:小鼹鼠气冲冲在树林里到处寻找大狗的踪迹,发誓一定要
严惩这个罪魁祸首。
(一只哈巴狗音乐开始,大狗出场)一只大狗趴在草地上,做熟睡类,还不时发出酣声。
小鼹鼠:“总算知道是谁干的了,我一定要找到他!”
小鼹鼠:“快醒醒,总算找到你这个坏家伙了,你看你拉了我一头的嗯嗯!”
旁白:大狗还在睡觉,小鼹鼠爬在大狗头上拉了一个小小的嗯嗯,然后钻到地下去了。