小度写范文[经典的英语笑话对话阅读]英语经典笑话模板

2023英语讲小笑话,3篇（范例推荐）英语讲的小笑话1雇主和雇员Workman: “Mr. Brown, I should like to ask for a smallrise in my wages.I have just been married."Employer: "Very sorry, my dear man, but I can"t help you. For accidents which happen to our workmen outside the factory we are not responsible."工人：“布朗先生，我想请您给我加一点工资。

我刚刚结了婚。

”雇主：“非常抱歉，老兄，但是我无能为力。

对工人在厂外发生的`事故我们概不负责。

”英语讲的小笑话2第一次开出租车A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath1, and stopped centimetres from a shop window.The driver said, "Look mate, don"t ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!" The passenger apologized and said, "I didn"t realize that a little tap would scare you so much." The driver replied, "Sorry, it"s not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver. I"ve been drivinga funeral van for the last 25 years."乘客轻拍了一下出租车司机的肩膀，想问个问题。

超级搞笑英语笑话小短文【篇一】超级搞笑英语笑话小短文给予与提取M.friend’.preparation.fo..visi.fro.he.childre.incl ude..tri.t.th.bank.Waitin.i.lin.a.th.teller’.windo mente.t.th.middle-age.ma.behind.her,”M.childre.ar.i.thei.20’s，an.I’.stil.givin.the.money.Whe.doe.i.end?”我的朋友为其子女的光临做着一些准备工作。

这些工作当然包括要到银行去一超。

当她在出纳员的窗外排队等候时，她对她身后的一位中年男子说:“我的孩子们都20多岁了，可我仍然得给他们钱。

这种事什么时候才算完呢?””I’.no.sure，”th.ma.replie.whil.glancin.uncomfortabl.a..pape.i.hi .hand，”bu.I`.no.th.on.t.ask.I’.her.t.deposi..chec.m.mothe .gav.me.”“我可不知道。

”那位男子边回答边不安地看着手里拿着的那张纸。

“我可不是你该问的人，我到这儿是来支取我妈妈给我的支票的。

”【篇二】超级搞笑英语笑话小短文妻子的欲望.woma.an.he.husban.wer.ou.shoppin.whe.sh.realiz e.tha.sh.neede.t.purchas.som.hai.colo.fo.he.grayin. hair.一位女士在与他的丈夫购物时，她意识到她该为她的灰白头发买些染发水了。

”Whe.ar.yo.goin.t.sto.buyin.tha.expensiv.stuf.,”complaine.th.husband.”an.le.you.hai.g.gra.lik.Barbar.Bush?”她丈夫抱怨说:“你什么时候才能停止买那些昂贵的东西，而让你的头发长成像芭芭拉.布什(总统夫人)的头发那样灰白呢?””Th.da.tha.you’r.inaugurated,”th.wif.replied.“那就要等到你就职的那天了。

英语对话小笑话带翻译笑话是日常生活中常见的现象,被广泛应用于电视剧、电影、小品和其他娱乐节目中。

下面是店铺带来的英语对话小笑话带翻译，欢迎阅读!英语对话小笑话带翻译篇一I'm a letter-carrier 我是邮递员A doctor told his patient there was nothing really the matter with him. "All you requir is more outdoor life, walk two or three miles regularly1 everyday. By the way, what's your business?""I'm a letter-carrier." the patient answered.医生告诉他的病人说他没有什么毛病。

“你现在需要的就是更多的户外生活，天天坚持走二三里路。

顺便问一下，你是干什么工作的?”“我是邮递员。

”病人回答。

英语对话小笑话带翻译篇二How about just one RIB? 一根肋骨怎么样?In the Eden, Adam told the God1: "I'm lonely, I need a company.""Ok," said the God, "I will give you a perfect woman, beautiful smart and gentle. She will cook clean and do everything for you, without any complaint2 and question.""Sounds good," Adam said, "But, to make such a good lady, WHAT is the cost?""One arm and One leg.""OH, expensive!" after thought for a while, Adam asked: "How about just one RIB3?"在天堂里，亚当对上帝说“我太寂寞了，我须要一个人陪我.”“好的”,上帝答到.“我将要给你一个完美的女人，美丽、聪明而且温柔，她将毫无怨言地为你烧饭，为你做一切事情。

英语幽默笑话笑话一：一只鸟的英语水平有一只鸟飞到了一家语言学校的窗户上，看到窗户上写着：“免费学习英语，从零开始。

”于是，它翘起了尾巴，挺起了胸脯，然后大声地说道：“Polly wants a cracker!”（小鹦鹉想要个饼干!）这时，里面的老师听到了声音，走过来看窗户，发现了一只鸟。

老师开玩笑说：“你来这里学习英语吗？”鸟点点头。

老师继续说：“那你可以念一句英文的经典名言吗？”鸟听后想了一下，然后顺利地说道：“Early to bed, early to rise, makes abird healthy, wealthy, and wise!”（早睡早起使鸟健康、富有和聪明！）老师忍不住惊讶地说：“哇，你的英语真是棒极了！你是怎么学会的？”鸟笑着回答：“Well, actually I learned English from none other than Polly the Parrot!”（嗯，其实我是从鹦鹉波利那里学的英语！）笑话二：失踪的手机一天晚上，一位英国中学生在回家的路上，不小心将他的手机掉在了路上。

等他发现手机丢了，已经回到家了，于是他告诉他的爸爸发生了什么事情。

爸爸安慰他说：“别担心，我帮你打个电话，看看能不能找到手机。

”于是爸爸打了个电话，手机立刻就响了起来，但是声音却传来的十分奇怪。

爸爸听后说：“嗨，我是XX的爸爸。

你找到了我儿子的手机吗？”手机那头传来一个陌生的声音：“是的，我找到了。

你是他爸爸吗？”爸爸回答：“是的，我是他爸爸。

”手机那头的声音又问：“那你能告诉我他的厕所在哪里吗？我正躲在这儿接你的电话呢！”笑话三：英语课上的问题一天在英语课上，老师问学生们一个问题：“如果今天是过去的昨天，明天是过去的明天，那么今天是星期几？”结果所有的学生都陷入了沉思，似乎没有一个学生能够回答出这个问题。

就在这时，一个学生举手回答道：“老师，今天是星期二。

”老师听后很惊讶地问他：“为什么你认为今天是星期二？”学生回答：“因为我们是星期一上的英语课！”笑话四：一个有趣的对话一位美国人和一位英国人在一家酒吧里坐在一起，开始聊天。

英语幽默笑话（优秀10篇）英国人有他们独特的英式幽默，他们流传的英语冷笑话让人会心一笑，今天，小编给同学们收集、整理了几则特别有趣的英语冷笑话，希望大家能开心开心，一起来看看吧! 篇一一、The little girl did not like the look of the barking dog.It#39;s all right, said a gentleman, don#39;t be afraid. Don#39;t you know the proverb: Barking dogs don#39;t bite?Ah, yes, answered the little girl. I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?一个小女孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。

“没有关系，”一位先生说，“不用害怕，你知道这条谚语吗：吠狗不咬人。

;”“啊，我是知道，可是狗也知道吗？”二、One student to another: How are your English lessons coming along?Fine. I used to be one who couldn#39;t understand the English men, and now it#39;s the English men who can#39;t understand me.一位学生对另一位说：“你的英语最近学的怎么样？”“很好，我过去不懂英国人说话，可现在是英国人不懂我的话了。

”三、An old lady who was very deaf and who thought everything too dear, went into a shop and asked the shopman:#39; How much this stuff?#39;#39;Seven dollars, Madam, it is very cheap.#39;The lady said, #39;It is too much, give it to me for fourteen.#39;#39;I did not say seventeen dollars, but seven.#39;#39;It is still too much,#39; replie()d the old lady, #39;give it to me for five.#39;一位耳聋并且总是嫌东西太贵的老太太走进一家商店。

英语搞笑笑话6篇幽默寓于笑话之中，它是笑话的精料，智慧之所在。

笑话是幽默的载体，一个成功的笑话能流传千古。

下面是店铺整理的英语搞笑笑话，欢迎大家阅读!英语搞笑笑话一：How can I get into heaven 我怎么才能上天堂"If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the poor, would I get into heaven?" I asked the children in my Sunday school class."No!" the children all answered."If I cleaned the church everyday, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would I get into heaven?"Again, the answer was, "No!""Well, " I continued, "then how can I get into heaven?"A five-year-old boy shouted out, "You gotta be dead!"“如果我把房子和车卖了，在车库举行义卖, 并把所有的钱给穷人，我能进天堂吗?”我问主日学校的孩子。

孩子们齐声回答：“不能!”“那如果我每天都打扫教堂，给院子的草坪割草，并且把东西都收拾得干净整洁，我会上天堂吗?”回答还是：“不能!”“好吧，”我继续问, “那我要怎样才能升天堂呢?”一个五岁的男孩儿叫道：“你得死了才行!”英语搞笑笑话二：I Want Her to go NutsMrs. Flinders decided to have her portrait painted. She told the artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets and a ruby pendant.""But you're not wearing any of those things.""I know," said Mrs. Flinders." It's in case I should die beforemy husband. I'm sure he'd remarry right away, and I want her to go nuts looking for the jewelry."福林德斯夫人决定让人给她画肖像。

笑话英语作文（通用5篇）笑话英语作文 1there was a cave full of lots of vampire bats. once, a bat called andy came home late and there was of blood all over his body. all of his friends and family asked him where the blood came from, and asked him to take place. he didnt want to tell them at first, but after a while, he said follow me, folks. then they flew over a valley, crossed a river, and stopped in front of a stone. andy asked do you guys see that tree? and his friends all answered yes and then andy said i didnt.笑话英语作文 2The famous Dr. Smith，dean of Medical College，was appointed private physician to the King. Whereupon he proudly wrote the following notice on the blackboard of his classes:“Professor Smith informs his students that he has been appointed Honorary Physician to Hi s Majesty the King.”When he returned to his classroom in the afternoon，he found written below his notice this line: "God save the King”笑话英语作文 3Once, there was a tourist who visited a small town for the first time. He walked around, admiring the beautiful scenery and unique architecture. As he walked, he saw a sign that said, "Free Cake!" Excited, he followed the sign and found himself at a local bakery. The baker, a kind old man, greeted him with a smile and offered him a delicious cake. The tourist, delighted, thanked the baker and took a bite of the cake. It was so good that he couldnt help but ask, "Why is this cake free?"The baker chuckled and replied, "Well, its not really free. Youhave to pay for it with a story."The tourist was confused. "A story? What kind of story?"The baker explained, "Every time someone takes a cake from me, they have to tell me a story about their life. Its my way of connecting with people and hearing their tales."The tourist thought for a moment and then began to tell the baker about his travels and adventures. He talked about the beautiful places he had seen and the interesting people he had met. The baker listened intently, occasionally nodding and smiling.When the tourist finished his story, the baker clapped his hands and said, "That was a wonderful story! You have earned your cake." The tourist smiled and thanked the baker again. As he walked out of the bakery, he realized that the best part of his trip wasnt the scenery or the architecture, but the connections he had made with the people he met.And so, he continued his journey, always looking for new adventures and new stories to share.笑话英语作文 4In a small town, there was a community garden where residents could grow their own vegetables. One sunny afternoon, an elderly gentleman named Mr. Smith decided to water his plants. He grabbed the hose and started watering his tomatoes, carrots, and cucumbers.As he was watering, he noticed a young boy running towards the garden with a bucket of water. The boy looked excited and eager to help. Mr. Smith smiled and waved at the boy, thinking it was nice to see young people interested in gardening.The boy came up to Mr. Smith and said, "Hello, sir! Im here to water the plants!"Mr. Smith replied, "Thats great, young man! Go ahead and water the plants over there."The boy nodded and started watering the plants next to Mr. Smith. However, he seemed to be having a bit of trouble with the bucket. It kept spilling water everywhere, and he kept stumbling over it.Mr. Smith watched with a chuckle and decided to offer some advice. "Maybe you should try holding the bucket more steady, young man."The boy looked up at Mr. Smith with a confused expression and said, "But Im not holding the bucket, sir. Its following me!"Mr. Smith looked down and realized that the boy was actually wearing the bucket as a helmet! He had holes drilled in it for his ears and a strap around his chin to keep it in place.Mr. Smith burst out laughing and patted the boy on the back. "Well, thats certainly a unique way to water the plants! You must be the most creative gardener in the community!"The boy smiled proudly and continued watering the plants, bucket helmet and all.笑话英语作文 5In a quiet suburban neighborhood, there was a park where residents often gathered to relax and enjoy the peaceful atmosphere. One day, a young girl named Emily noticed a squirrel running around the park, gathering nuts and acorns. She decided to follow the squirrel to see where it was going.Emily followed the squirrel through the park, across the street, and into a nearby yard. The squirrel seemed to be leading her somewhere, and she was curious to see where it would end up.As they entered the yard, Emily noticed a man in a weird-lookingsuit standing near a tree. He had a pair of binoculars around his neck and was holding a clipboard. Emily thought he looked like a scientist or a researcher.The squirrel ran up to the man and stopped, as if it was waiting for something. The man looked down at the squirrel, smiled, and then reached into his pocket and pulled out a nut. He handed it to the squirrel, and it quickly ran off with it.Emily was confused. She walked up to the man and asked, "Excuse me, sir, but why are you giving nuts to that squirrel?"The man turned and looked at Emily with a surprised expression. "Oh, hello there! Im actually a squirrel behavior researcher. Im studying how squirrels interact with humans and their environment." Emily was intrigued. "Really? Can I help?"The man smiled and nodded. "Sure! Why dont you try handing a nut to the squirrel and see what it does?"Emily took a nut from her pocket and carefully approached the squirrel. She held out the nut, and the squirrel quickly came up to her and took it in its mouth. Then, it turned and ran back to the man.Emily was amazed. "That was so cool! It actually came to me!" The man chuckled and explained, "Squirrels are very intelligent animals. They can recognize faces and even remember who has given them food before. Thats why it came to you."Emily felt special and excited. She thanked the man for his help and decided to continue observing the squirrels behavior. As she walked away, she noticed that the squirrel was following her, as if it wanted to show her more of its world.Emily smiled and whispered to the squirrel, "I think were goingto be good friends."。

英语笑话带翻译范文1. Joke: Why did the scarecrow win an award?Answer: Because he was outstanding in his field!Translation: 为什么稻草人获得了奖项？因为他在他的领域表现出色！2. Joke: Why don't skeletons fight each other?Answer: They don't have the guts!Translation: 为什么骷髅不互相打架？因为它们没有胆量！3. Joke: How does a penguin build its house?Answer: Igloos it together!Translation: 企鹅是如何建造它的房子的？用冰块把它粘在一起！4. Joke: What do you call a bear with no teeth?Answer: A gummy bear!Translation: 没有牙齿的熊叫什么？果冻熊！5. Joke: Why don't eggs tell jokes?Answer: Because they might crack up!Translation: 为什么鸡蛋不讲笑话？因为它们可能会笑破肚皮！6. Joke: How do you organize a space party?Answer: You planet!Translation: 你如何组织太空派对？你把星球放在那儿！7. Joke: Why don't scientists trust atoms?Answer: Because they make up everything!Translation: 为什么科学家不相信原子？因为它们构成了一切！8. Joke: What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? Answer: An abdominal snowman!Translation: 一个有六块腹肌的雪人叫什么？腹肌雪人！9. Joke: What did one wall say to the other wall?Answer: I'll meet you at the corner!Translation: 一个墙对另一个墙说了什么？我们在角落见！10. Joke: Why don't seagulls fly over the bay?Answer: Because then they would be bagels!Translation: 海鸥为什么不飞过海湾？因为那样它们就成了贝果！11. Joke: What do you call a bear without any ears? Answer: B!Translation: 没有耳朵的熊叫什么？B！12. Joke: What did zero say to eight?Answer: Nice belt!Translation: 零对八说了什么？漂亮的腰带！13. Joke: How do you make a tissue dance?Answer: You put a little boogie in it!Translation: 如何让纸巾跳舞？装点点动作！14. Joke: Why was the math book sad?Answer: Because it had too many problems!Translation: 数学书为什么伤心？因为它有太多问题！Answer: It left its Windows open!Translation: 电脑为什么冷？因为它忘记关掉窗口！这些英语笑话可以为大家带来一些轻松愉快的时刻。

对话类英语小笑话短文笑话来源于生活，是学来的。

笑话是一种经过艺术加工的语言形式,是艺术化的语言，笑话是一种艺术方法，用这种方法造成以笑为艺术手段的文学艺术作品。

小编精心收集了对话类英语小笑话短文，供大家欣赏学习!对话类英语小笑话短文篇1"I had an operation," said a man to his friend, "and the doctor left a sponge in me."一个男人对他的朋友说：“我动了一次手术，手术后医生把一块海绵忘在我的身体里了。

”"That's terrible!" said the friend. "Got any pain?"“真是太糟糕了!”朋友说道：“你觉得疼吗?”"No, but I am always thirsty!"“不疼，可是我总感到口渴。

”对话类英语小笑话短文篇2Father: Jack, why do you drink so much water?爸爸：杰克，你干嘛喝这么多水呀?Jack: I have just had an apple, Dad.杰克：我刚才吃了个苹果，爸爸。

Father: What's that got to do with it?爸爸：可是这跟喝水有什么关系呢?Jack: I forgot to wash the apple.杰克：我忘了洗苹果呀。

对话类英语小笑话短文篇3A drunk phoned police to report that thieves had been in his car. "They've stolen thedashboard, the steering wheel, even the brake pedal!" he cried out.一个醉汉打电话给警察局，报告小偷光顾了他的车，“他们偷走了仪表盘、方向盘，甚至连刹车脚板都偷走了。

简单幽默英语小笑话(细选3篇)简单幽默英语小笑话1There once was a young couple who lived in a town filled with crime. After three neighbors' houses had been robbed, the couple decided to get a guard dog.So one day the wife went to the pet store and said, “I need a good guard dog.”And the clerk replied, “Sorry, we're all sold out. All we have left is this little Scottie dog. But he knows karate.”The wife didn't believe him so he said to the dog, "Karate that chair.”The dog went up to the chair and broke it into pieces, then he said to the dog, “Karate that table.” The dog went up to the table and broke it in half.So the wife bought the dog and took it home to her husband who was expecting a big guard dog. But then she told her husband that it knew karate, and he said “Karate my ass!”简单幽默英语小笑话2Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on stretchers next to each other, outside the operating room. The first kid leans over and asks, "What are you in here for?"The second kid says, "I'm in here to get my tonsils out and I'm a little nervous."The first kid says, "You've got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots of Jell-O and ice cream. It's a breeze!"The second kid then asks, "What are you here for?"The first kid says, "A circumcision."And the second kid says, "Whoa! I had that done when I was born. I couldn't walk for a year!"简单幽默英语小笑话3Bifocals Barbie. Comes with her own set of blended-lens fashion frames in six wild colors (half-frames too!), neck chain and large-print editions of Vogue and Martha Stewart Living.Hot Flash Barbie. Press Barbie's bellybutton and watch her face turn beet red while tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead. Comes with hand-held fan and tiny tissues.Facial Hair Barbie. As Barbie's hormone levels shift, see her whiskers grow. Available with teensy tweezers and magnifying mirror.Flabby Arms Barbie. Hide Barbie's droopy triceps with thesenew, roomier-sleeved gowns. Good news on the tummy front, too-muumuus with tummy-support panels are included.Bunion Barbie. Years of disco dancing in stiletto heels have definitely taken their toll on Barbie's dainty arched feet. Soothe her sores with the pumice stone and plasters, then slip on soft terry mules.No-More-Wrinkles Barbie. Erase those pesky crow's-feet and lip lines with a tube of Skin Sparkle-Spackle, from Barbie's own line of exclusive age-blasting cosmetics.Soccer Mom Barbie. All that experience as a cheer-leader is really paying off as Barbie dusts off her old high school megaphone to root for Babs and Ken, Jr. Comes with minivan in robin-egg blue or white, and cooler filled with doughnut holes and fruit punch.Mid-life Cr Barbie. It's time to ditch Ken. Barbie needs a change, and Alonzo (her personal trainer)is just what the doctor ordered, along with Prozac. They're hopping in her new red Miata and heading for the Napa Valley to open a B别睡在庙里，因为跑得了和尚跑不了庙!初恋防震最佳，因为爱情像雨像雾又像风。