爆笑少儿英语笑话大全超级搞笑的
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少儿幽默英语经典小笑话少儿英语小笑话He WonTommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.Tommy: Thats too bad. How did that happen?Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.他赢了汤姆:约翰尼,你小弟弟好吗?约翰尼:他害病卧床了。
他受了伤。
汤姆:真糟糕,怎么回事儿?约翰尼:我们做游戏,看谁能把身子探出窗外最远,他赢了。
优秀英语笑话A Good BoyLittle Robert asked his mother for two cents. What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?I gave it to a poor old woman, he answered.Youre a good boy, said the mother proudly. Here are two cents more. Butwhy are you so interested in the old woman?She is the one who sells the candy.好孩子小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
昨天给你的钱干什么了?我给了一个可怜的老太婆,他回答说。
你真是个好孩子,妈妈骄傲说。
再给你两分钱。
可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?她是个卖糖果的。
幽默的英语笑话I Have His Ear in My PocketIvan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, What happened?A kid bit me, replied Ivan.Would you recognize him if you saw him again? asked his mother.Id know him any where, said Ivan. I have his ear in my pocket.他的耳朵在我衣兜里伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。
少儿英文小笑话大全爆笑幽默与笑话同是社会交往活动中不可缺少的交际手段。
下面是店铺精心收集的爆笑少儿英文小笑话,希望大家喜欢!爆笑少儿英文小笑话篇一A philosophy professor warned the classhe wasgoing to give them a test.一位哲学教授通知学生他要举行一场考试。
When the day came he entered theclassroom,wordlessly placed his chair on the tableand,turning to the blackboard, wrote, 考试那天,他走进教室,一言不发地把自己的椅子放到讲台上,然后转身在黑板上写道,"Prove to me this chair does not exist."“请向我证明这张椅子不存在。
”Most of the nervous studentbegan intently scribbling out long dissertations.大多数学生很紧张,都开始专心地写他们的论文。
But one member of the class wrote down just two words,and then handed his paper to theteacher.只有一个学生只写了两个单词就交卷了。
The professor had to smile when he read the student's answer:"What chair?"当教授看到这个学生的答案时,不由微笑了,只见他写的是:“什么椅子啊?”爆笑少儿英文小笑话篇二A big burly man visited the pastor's homeand askedto see the minister's wife,a woman well known forher charitable impulses.一个高大魁梧的男人到牧师家拜访,他要求会见牧师的妻子,这是一个以有着慈悲心肠而闻名的妇女。
关于儿童爆笑英语笑话大全英语笑话的娱乐作用可以减轻人的心理压力,促进身体健康。
在人不开心的时候听几则英语笑话可以让人马上变得开心起来。
小编精心收集了关于儿童爆笑英语笑话,供大家欣赏学习!关于儿童爆笑英语笑话:A Small Boy and a Donkey 小男孩与驴子A small boy leading a donkey passed by an Army camp. A couple of soldiers wanted to have some fun with the lad(少年,小伙子) . What are you holding onto your brother so tight for, sonny? asked one of them. So he won't join the army, the youngster replied without blinking an eye.一个小男孩牵着头驴子穿过部队营房。
两名士兵想跟小家伙开个玩笑:小孩,你把你哥哥牵得这么紧干什么? 这样,他就不会去参军了。
小家伙眼都不眨地回答道。
关于儿童爆笑英语笑话:I'm Glad 我很高兴A Sunday school teacher was telling her pupils the importance of making others glad. Now, children, said she, has anyone of you ever made someone else glad?Please, teacher, said a small boy, I've made someone glad yesterday.Well done. Who was that?My granny.Good boy. Now tell us how you made your grand mother glad.Please, teacher, I went to see her yesterday, and stayed with her three hours. Then I said to her, ‘Granny, I'm going home,’ and she said, ‘Well, I'm glad’!一个主日学校的老师正在对学生讲使别人高兴的重要性。
少儿幽默英语笑话带翻译少儿幽默英语笑话1:After friends of mine landed at busy Newwark Airport, they were unable to attract the attention of any porters to help with their luggage. In desperation, the husband took out a five-dollar bill and waved it above the crowd.In an instant, a skycap was at his side. Sir, observed the porter, you certainly have excellent communication skills.我的朋友们在繁忙的纽瓦克机场着陆后,他们却不能招呼到脚夫来帮他们搬行李。
无奈,丈夫拿出一张五美元的钞票在人群上面摇晃。
一个带宽边帽的人马上来到他身边。
“先生,”脚夫说道,“很明显你有绝妙的交际技巧。
”少儿幽默英语笑话2:Harry and Lloyd were speeding down the road. A police car pulled them over."Why on earth were you driving so fast?" the policeman yelled."Our brakes are no good, so we wanted to get there before we had an accident!"哈里与劳埃德超速行驶,一辆警车拦住了他们。
“你们为什么开那么快?”警官喊道。
“我们的刹车不好,因此我们想在发生事故前赶紧到达目的地。
”少儿幽默英语笑话3:After being away on business, Tim thought it would be nice to bring his wife a little gift.“How about some perfume?”he asked the cosmetics clerk. She showed him a $50.00 bottle.“That’s a bit much,”said Tim, so she returned with a smaller bottle for $30.00.“That’s still quite a bit,”Tim complained.Growing annoyed, the clerk brought out a tiny $15.00 bottle.“What I mean,”said Tim, “is I’d like to see something really cheap.”The clerk handed him a mirror.做完生意回来后,提姆觉得应该给妻子带点什么礼物回去。
小学生幽默英文笑话大全笑话拥有广大的受众,深受人们喜爱,是生活中不可缺少的一环。
小编精心收集了小学生幽默英文笑话,供大家欣赏学习!小学生幽默英文笑话:家丑不可外扬Teacher of Physical Education: Have you ever seen mixed doubles, boys?Nick: Yes, sir. Quite often. I saw it even last night.Teacher: Please tell us something about it.Nick: Oh, sorry, sir. My father always says, 'Domestic shame should not be published.'混合双打体育老师:孩子们,你们见过男女混合双打吗?尼克:见过,老师,经常见。
就在昨天夜里我还见过呢?老师:你给大家讲讲当时的情形吧。
尼克:啊,对不起,老师。
我爸爸常说,”家丑不可外扬。
“小学生幽默英文笑话:It's Kind of Fitting(理应如此)As a freshman at the University of Dayton in Ohio, I was eager to make a good impression on my new roommate. When I arrived at our dorm room, I found her putting on perfume. "That's a great scent," I said, making conversation."Thanks-it was from my boyfriend. Here, try some," she said, holding the bottle out for me.Unfortunately she let go before I had a firm grip, and the glass shattered on the tile floor. , Embarrassed, I tried to apologize, but she cut me off - "Actually, it's kind of fitting," she explained, surveying the damage. "That's exactly how the relationship went.小学生幽默英文笑话:ResponesFrequent hand-washing in my job as a medical technologistand the harsh Alaskan weather combined to give me very dry skin. One night as I prepared for bed, I rubbed my hands withpetroleum jelly and covered them with a pair of old white gloves.As I sat in bed reading a book with my gloves on, my husband finished showering and came into the room. Drying himself off, he went to the closet, selected a tie and began putting it on. "What are you doing?" I asked."Well," he replied, "if you're going to be formal, so am I."小学生幽默英文笑话:Two Old MenTwo old men were sitting on a porch with a hound dog between them. The dog had its leg hiked up and was licking itself. One of the old men said to the other, "I sure do wish I could do that."The other old man said, "You better not, that dog will bite you."。
小学英语幽默笑话精选“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。
”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。
笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。
下面店铺为大家带来小学英语幽默笑话精选,欢迎大家阅读!小学英语幽默笑话精选1:Son: "Dad, give me a dime."儿子:“爸爸,给我一毛钱。
”Father: "Son, don't you think you're getting too big to be forever begging for dimes?"父亲:“儿子,你不认为自己渐渐长大,不应该总是一毛一毛地要钱吗?”Son: "I guess you're right, dad. Give me a dollar, will you?"儿子:“爸爸,我想你说得对。
给我一块钱,好吗?”小学英语幽默笑话精选2:The librarian went over to a small, noisy boy. "Please be quiet!" she warned. "The people around you can't read!"图书管理员走到一个喧闹的小男孩身边,警告说:“请安静!你周围的人都不能读书了!”"They can't?" The boy asked curiously. "Then what are they doing here?"“不能读书?”小男孩好奇地问道。
“那他们在这里干什么?”小学英语幽默笑话精选3:betty:"Black hens are cleverer than white ones, aren't they?"贝蒂:“黑母鸡比白母鸡聪明,对吗?”Larry:"How do you know?"拉里:“你怎么知道?”Betty:"Well, the black hens can lay white eggs, but the white hens can't lay black ones."贝蒂:“嗯,因为黑母鸡能下白蛋,可白母鸡不能下黑蛋。
小学生爆笑英文小笑话大全小学生爆笑英文小笑话:狗住旅店A man wrote a letter to a small hotel he planned to visit on his vacation: "I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He iswell-groomed and very well behaved. Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with me at night?"有个人给一家他计划在假期里停留的小旅馆写了封信,“我非常希望带着我的狗,它很干净很有教养,你能允许它和我睡一间屋子吗?”An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, who said, "I've been operating this hotel for many years. In all that time, I've never had a dog steal towels, bedclothes, silverware or pictures off the walls. I've never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night for being drunk and disorderly. And I've never had a dog run out on a hotel bill. Yes, indeed, your dog is welcome at my hotel. And, if your dog will vouch for you, you're welcome to stay here, too."旅馆主人立即回了封信,“我经营旅馆很多年了,狗从没偷过毛巾,床单,餐具,或者墙上的画。
"Well, it down and have ome nack," aid hi mother. "Your tomach" hurting becaue it" empty. It"ll be all right when you"ve got omething in it." “来,坐下,吃些点心,”他的妈妈说。
“你肚子疼,是因为肚子空了。
Your handwriting eem very large." “你的字写得好像很大。
” "Well, Grandpa" deaf, o I"m writing it loudly." “啊,爷爷耳聋,所以我要写得大声点。
” 好笑的儿童英语笑话篇四 The orchard-keeper potted a little boy neak into the orchard and climb an apple tree, o he raced over. "Little devil, what are you doing up on my tree" 护园人发现一个小男孩偷偷钻进果园,爬上了一棵苹果树,就迅速走了过去。
“小家伙,你在我的树上做什么” "Look here, ir, an apple fell off your tree, o I"m trying to put it up again!" the boy replied holding the apple in hi hand. “看这里,先生,一个苹果从您的树上掉了下来,所以我想把它重新挂上去!”小男孩举着手里的苹果回答说。
精选爆笑儿童英语笑话11则1、One day a visitor from the citycame to a small rural area to drive around the country roads, see how the farmslooked, and perhaps to see how farmers earned their living. The city man saw afarmer in his yard, holding a pig up in his hands, and lifting it so that thepig could eat apples from an apple tree. The city man said to thefarmer,"I see that your pig likes apples, but isn't that quite a waste oftime?" The farmer replied," What's time to a pig?"一天,有一个城市里的游客来到一个小乡村,在乡间路上开着车,想看看农庄是什么样子,也想看看农夫怎样种田过日子。
这位城里人看见一位农夫在宅后的草地上,手中抱着一头猪,并把它举得高高的,好让它能够吃到树上的苹果。
城里人对农夫说,"我看你的猪挺喜欢吃苹果的,但是,这不是很浪费时间吗?"那位农夫回答说,"时间对猪有什么意义?"2、TheLooney BinLate one night at the insane asylum (疯人院)oneinmate shouted, "I am Napoleon!”Anotherone said, "How do you know?"The first inmate said, "God told me!"Just then, a voice from another room shouted, "I didnot!"疯人院一天晚上,在疯人院里,一个病人说:“我是拿破仑!”另一个说:“你怎么知道?”第一个人说:“上帝对我说的!”一会儿,一个声音从另一个房间传来:“我没说!”Notes:(1)Looney (俚语)疯子(2)inmate (n.同住者, 同室者(特指在医院、监狱))(3)insane asylum (疯人院)3、Boxing andRunningDan is teaching his son how to box. As he does so, he lefthis friend, "This is a tough world, so I’m teaching my boy to fight."Friend: "But suppose he comes up against someone muchbigger than he is, who’s also been taught how to box."Dan: "I’m teaching him how to run, too."拳击和赛跑丹在教他的儿子怎样拳击。
儿童英语幽默小笑话带翻译1.儿童英语幽默小笑话带翻译钱不用找了Selling secondhand books at our church bazaar, I got into an argument with a prospective customer. He was interested in buying The Pocket Book of Ogden Nash but claimed it was overpriced at 35 cents. Other paperbacks were selling for ten or 15 cents each.在教堂的义卖市上卖旧书时,我与一名准备买东西的顾客发生了一场争论。
他对购买袖珍奥金.纳什集颇感兴趣,但是说它要三十五美分开价过高。
其它的平装书每本才卖十或十五美分。
I pointed out that the book was in good condition. Nash was a fun poet, and it was for a good cause. He said it was a matter of principle. Ultimately, I agreed to sell him the book for 15 cents. Triumphant, he paid with a $10 bill. “Keep the change,” he said.我指出这本书保存状况颇好,纳什是个有趣的诗人,这个要价是合理的。
他说这是个原则问题。
最终,我同意以十五美分的价格将这本书卖给他。
他得意洋洋,拿出一张十美元的票子付帐。
“零钱不用找了。
”他说。
12.儿童英语幽默小笑话带翻译amos asked his mother whether they could have a video.艾莫斯问妈妈他们是否能买一台录像机。
i’m afraid we can’t afford one, sighed his mother.恐怕我们还买不起,妈妈叹息着说。
爆笑少儿英语笑话大全超级搞笑的
导读:我根据大家的需要整理了一份关于《爆笑少儿英语笑话大全超级搞笑的》的内容,具体内容:笑话,是供人们消遣或交际的一种创造性的语言形式,其主要功能是调侃、娱乐或讽刺。
少儿也有专属于他们的笑话。
我整理了爆笑少儿英语笑话,欢迎阅读!爆笑少儿英语笑话:When he g...笑话,是供人们消遣或交际的一种创造性的语言形式,其主要功能是调侃、娱乐或讽刺。
少儿也有专属于他们的笑话。
我整理了爆笑少儿英语笑话,欢迎阅读!
爆笑少儿英语笑话:When he grows up
A father is asked by his friend, "Has your son decided what he wants to be when he grows up?"
"Yes, he wants to be a garbage collector," replied the boys father. His friend thought for a moment and responded, "Thats a rather strange ambition to have for a career."
"Well," said the boys father, "he thinks that garbage collectors only work on Tuesdays!"
爆笑少儿英语笑话:Circumcision
Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on stretchers next to each other outside an operating room.
The first kid leans over and asks, "What are you in here for?" The second kid says, "Im in here to get my tonsils out, and Im
a little nervous."
The first kid says, "Youve got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up, they give you lots of Jell-O and ice cream. Its a breeze."
The second kid then asks, "What are you here for?"
"A circumcision," the first kid answers.
"Whoa!", the second kid says. "Good luck, buddy. I had that done when I was born. I couldnt walk for a year."
爆笑少儿英语笑话:When I grow up...
The teacher asked her class what each wanted to become when they grew up. A chorusof responses came from all over the room.
"A football player," said Jim.
"A doctor," said Alfred.
"An astronaut," said Suzy.
"The president," said little Al. (Everyone laughed).
"A fireman," said Fred.
"A teacher," said Lisa.
"A race car driver." said Mario.
Everyone that is, except Tommy.
The teacher noticed he was sitting there quiet and still. So she said to him, "Tommy, what do you want to be when you grow up?"
"Possible." Tommy replied.
"Possible?" asked the teacher.
"Yes," Tommy said. "My mom is always telling me Im impossible. So when I get to be big, I want to be possible."
爆笑少儿英语笑话:Looking for me
The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers.
He dialed the employees home phone number and was greeted with a childs whispered, "Hello?"
Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to a youngster the boss asked, "Is your Daddy home?"
"Yes", whispered the small voice.
"May I talk with him?" the man asked.
To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered, "No." Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?"
"Yes", came the answer.
"May I talk with her?"
Again the small voice whispered, "no".
Knowing that it was not likely that a young child would be left home alone, the bossdecided he would just leave a message with the person who should be there watching over the child. "Is there any one there besides you?" the boss asked the child.
"Yes" whispered the child, "A policeman".
Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employees home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman"?
"No, hes busy", whispered the child.
"Busy doing what?, asked the boss.
"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman", came the whispered answer.
Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise?"
A hello-copper", answered the whispering voice.
"What is going on there?", asked the boss, now alarmed.
In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper"
Alarmed, concerned and more than just a little frustrated the boss asked, "Why are they there"?
Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle: "Theyre looking for me!"。