史上最神级爆笑英语翻译

英语爆笑小笑话带翻译超搞笑英语爆笑小笑话：Goethe's ToleranceGoethe was once strolling on a narrow path in a park in Weimar. As luck would have it, he met with a critic who was hostile to him. Both of them stopped, staring at each other. Then the critic said, I'll never make way for a fool. But I will, with that Goethe retreated aside.一次，歌德正在魏玛一个公园的一条狭窄小道上散步，碰巧他遇见一个对他怀有敌意的评论家。

两人都停了下来，彼此相互对视。

接着评论家说道：我从来不给傻瓜让路。

可我给，说完歌德退到了一边。

英语爆笑小笑话：Good SightLawyer: You say you were about thirty-five feet away from the scene of the accident? Just how far can you see clearly?Witness: Well, when I wake up in the morning I see the sun, and they tell me it's about ninety-three million miles away.律师：你说你离事故现场约有35英尺，你能看清多远的东西?证人：这么说吧，早上起床后我看见太阳，别人告诉我这大约有9300万英里远。

英语爆笑小笑话：拿破仑病了Jack had gone to the university to study history, but at the end of his first year, his history professor failed him in his examinations, and he was told that he would have to leave the university. However, his father decided that he would go to see the professor to urge him to let Jack continue his studies the following year."He's a good boy," said Jack's father, "and if you let him pass this time, I'm sure he'll improve a lot next year and pass the examinations at the end of it really well.""No, no, that's quite impossible," replied the professor immediately. "Do you know, last month I asked him when Napoleon had died, he didn't know!""Please, sir, give him another chance," said Jack's father. "You see, I'm afraid we don't take any newspaper in our house, so none of us even know that Napoleon was ill."杰克到一所大学去学历史。

让人不忍直视的搞笑英语翻译1、How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?直译：一根火柴能点着整片森林，一盒火柴也生不起个营火，这咋回事!意译：想当年哥戴套都能让人怀孕，看今朝叔竟然去看男科2、If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea… does that mean that one enjoys it?如果4/5的人在忍受腹泻的痛苦，那剩下1/5咋回事?很享受吗?3、Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.直译：知识就是说你知道西红柿是一种水果;智慧就好似不要把它放进水果沙拉里。

意译a：知识就是告诉你说应该把鸡蛋放进篮子，智慧则是叫你不要把所有鸡蛋都放进一个篮子。

意译b:所谓知识就是知道韩少和小四都属于80后，但智慧告诉你这终还是男女有别~4、If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.上帝瞅着咱们呢，大伙好歹喜感点吧!5、Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill anda laxative on the same night.无论，在任何情况下，永远，不要在一个夜晚，同时吃，安眠药，和通便灵。

6、The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.a. 早起滴小鸟有虫虫!晚到的老鼠有奶酪!b. 早起的鸟儿有虫吃，早起的虫儿被鸟吃。

史上最搞笑的英语笑话带翻译英语幽默笑话带翻译1:A man was hit by a cab in the street. He was brought to the hospital. His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "I think that he is very ill." "I am afraid that he is dead."said the doctor, Hearing this, the man moved his head and said: "I'm not dead. I'm still alive." "Be quiet, "said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!" 医生懂得多一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院.他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说:"我想他伤得很厉害."医生说:"我怕他已经死了."听到医生的话,这个男人转动着头说:"我没死,我还活着."妻子说:"安静,医生比你懂得多."2:You can't go without meThe bus is very crowded.Aman tries to get on,but no one gives way to him. "Hey,let me get on the bus."the man shouts."It's too crowded.You'd better take the next bus."a passenger says to him."But you can't go withou me.I'm the driver."the man says. 没有我你们走不了公共汽车上很拥挤.一位男士想上车,但是没有人给他让路."喂,让我上车!"那位男士喊道."车太挤了,你最好坐下一辆"车上的一位乘客对他说."但是没有我你们走不了.我是司机!"那位男士说道.3:DrunkOne day, a father and his little son were going home. Atthis age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," hisfather replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk.""But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"醉酒一天，父亲与小儿子一道回家。

英语爆笑笑话5篇带翻译超搞笑的下面是店铺整理的英语爆笑笑话5篇，欢迎大家阅读!英语爆笑笑话一：Hospitality好客The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-piewithout any cheese.由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时，家里没有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。

The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returnedwith a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate.这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。

过了一会儿，他拿着一片奶酪回到房间，把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。

The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You musthave better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?"客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。

你在哪里找到的奶酪?”"In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.“在捕鼠夹上，先生。

”那小男孩说。

英语爆笑笑话二：太黑了，看不见After supper, the parents were busy playing mah-jong with the guests. At this point the mother thought of something and said to her son who was watching TV, "Honey, go see if the kitchen light is on or not?" After a while, her son returned and said, "Ma, the kitchen is so dark that I cannot see it at all."晚饭后，父亲和母亲都忙着和客人玩麻将，这时母亲忽然想起点儿事来，便对正在看电视的儿子说道：“宝贝，去看看厨房里的灯是不是还开着呢?”过了一会儿，儿子回来说：“妈，厨房里太黑了，我根本就看不见。

爆笑的英语笑话大全带翻译近年来,冷笑话作为一种新兴的语言现象在网络、杂志上十分盛行。

我细心收集了爆笑的英语笑话大全带翻译，供大家欣赏学习!爆笑的英语笑话大全带翻译：还没那么急Looking very unhappy, a poor man entered a doctors consulting-room. "Doctor,' he said, "you must help me. I swallowed a penny about a month ago.' "Good heavens, man!' said the doctor. "Why have you waited so long? Why dont you come to me on the day you swallowed it?' "To tell you the truth, Doctor,' the poor man replied, "I didnt need the money so badly then.'一个看起来很难受的穷人走进大夫的诊室。

"大夫!' 他说，"帮帮我!一个月前我吞了一分硬币!' "天哪，' 大夫说，" 早干嘛去了?你当时怎么不来看?' "实话告知您吧，大夫，'穷人说，"我当时还不缺钱!'爆笑的英语笑话大全带翻译：老夫妻吵嘴A couple of codgers got into a quarrel and came before the local magistrate. The loser,turning to his opponent in a combative frame of mind, cried: Ill law you to the CircuitCourt.一对性情乖僻的老夫妻发生了争吵，始终闹到地方法官那里。

英语小笑话大全笑破你的肚子带翻译犯人说：“因为我在新年时，太早去采购了。

”他说：“商店还没开门，我就已经进去了。

”更多尽在笑话网。

One day, he went out hunting with some friends. A strong wind suddenly blew his wig off. When his friends saw what had happened, they started laughing so hard that they could not stop.有一天，他和几个朋友出去打猎。

突然，刮起了大风，把他的假发吹得无影无踪。

朋友们看到此情此景，乐得不行，笑个不停。

The bald guy started laughing, too, and just as loudly as the other men. He said to his friends, “How can I expect my fake hair to stay on my head when even my real hair won’t stay there?”秃头老先生也开始大笑，笑容和其他人一样灿烂，笑声和其他人一样响亮他对朋友们说：“我的真发都急慌慌地要离开我，我的假发又怎么会愿意呆在我的头上呢?”Mr. Johnson: Are you using you mower this afternoon?约翰逊先生：今天下午你准备用割草机吗?Mr.Smith: Yes.史密斯先生：是的。

Mr.Johnson: Fine. Then can I borrow your tennis racket, since you won't be needing it?约翰逊先生：太好了。

既然您不用网球拍，那我可以借用一下吗?An offender was brought to trial before a judge. The judge asked him, "What is the crime you have mitted?"有个犯人被带到法官面前审案，法官问他：“你犯了什么罪?”The offender said, "I went shopping too early during the New Year."犯人说：“因为我在新年时，太早去采购了。

超搞笑的英语翻译句子很多人学英语都比较习惯中式化，在翻译的时候，一些中式的翻译非常的搞笑，让你笑个不停哦!1. World sing how learn 我的心好冷2. Husband and wife lung slice.夫妻肺片3. We two who and who? 咱俩谁跟谁阿!4. Make my heart peng peng peng.怦然心动5. As far as you go to die.有多远，死多远!6. Chinese dream flying nine days.中国梦飞九天7. Dangqi dream , I have the power.荡起梦想，我有力量8. No care three seven two ten one. 不管三七二十一9. play a big knife before Guan Gong 关公面前耍大刀10. One day is your teacher, day day is your father.一日为师终身为父。

11. If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one! 要钱没有，要命一条12. One car come, one car go, two car pengpeng, one car died! (关于一场车祸的描述)13. Know is know ，no know is no know，is know 也. 知之为知之，不知为不知，是知也14. Hello everybody! if you have something to say, then say! if you have nothing to say, go home! 有事起奏，无事退朝15. You have seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers!together up! 你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上!。

幽默的英语笑话以下是六个幽默的英语笑话及翻译：1. Why is the doctor so angry? （为什么医生那么生气？）Because he has no patience.（因为他没有耐心呀。

）笑点：耐心=patience，病人（复数形式）=patients，两个词读音相似，一语双关。

2. What is the longest word in the English language?（英语里最长的单词是？)Smiles. Because there is a mile between its first and last letters.（Smiles，因为它的首尾字母之间隔了一英里那么长。

)笑点：翻译时需要保留smiles，因为中文不分单复数，这里规避了字面意义上的最长，而是利用了单词mile 的含义。

3. What do you call a deer with no eyes?（你把没有眼睛的鹿叫做什么？）No idea.（不知道。

）笑点：deer 和idea 读音相似，这里是谐音梗。

4. Two cats are on a roof. Which one slides off first?（两只猫在屋顶上，哪只先滑下来？）The one with the smaller mew!（叫声更小的那只！）笑点：mew 是猫叫的拟声词，这里也可以理解为mu（摩擦系数），根据物理定律，摩擦系数越小，物体越容易滑动。

5. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?（当你把一个雪人跟一个吸血鬼结合起来，会得到什么？）Frostbite.（霜冻。

）笑点：frostbite 有霜冻和冻伤的意思，这里是双关。

6. What's the best thing to put into a pie?（什么东西放在馅饼里最好？）Your teeth.（你的牙齿。

史上最神级爆笑英语翻译1、You ask me, me ask who? 你问我，我问谁?2、We two who and who？咱俩谁跟谁啊！3、How are you ? How old are you? 怎么是你，怎么老是你？4、you don’t bird me,I don’t bird you 你不鸟我，我也不鸟你5、You have seed, I will give you some color to see see. 你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧。

6、Want money no，want life one! 要钱没有，要命一条！7、Love who who爱谁谁。

8、I give you face you don’t wanna face 我给你脸你不要脸。

9、Horse horse tiger tiger马马虎虎10、no money no talk 没钱免谈11、You Give Me Stop! 你给我站住！12、big one mother 大姨妈13、let the horse come on 放马过来。

14、red face know me 红颜知己15、seven up eight down 七上八下16、No three no four 不三不四17、I call Li old big. toyear 25. 我叫李老大，今年25。

18、heart flower angry open 心花怒放19、dry mother 干妈20、you me you me彼此彼此21、Good good study, day day up. 好好学习，天天向上。

22、Where cool where you stay！哪凉快上哪呆着去。

23、One car come, one car go, two car pengpeng, one car died! (关于一场车祸的描述)24、People mountain people sea. 人山人海。

1．we two who and who？咱俩谁跟谁阿2．how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你，怎么老是你？3．you don't bird me,I don't bird you你不鸟我，我也不鸟你4．you have seed I will give you some color to see see,brothers！together up ！你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！5．hello everybody!if you have something to say,they say! if you have nothing to say,go home!!有事起奏，无事退朝6．you me you me彼此彼此7．You Give Me Stop!!你给我站住！8．know is know noknow is noknow知之为知之，不知为不知…9．WATCH SISTER表妹10．dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse's sons can make hole!!龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞！11．American Chinese not enough美中不足12．one car come one car go ,two car pengpeng,people die车祸现场描述13．heart flower angry open心花怒放14．go past no mistake past走过路过，不要错过15．小明：I am sorry!老外：I am sorry too!小明：I am sorry three!老外：What are you sorry for?小明：I am sorry five!16.If you want money,I have no; if you want life,I have one!要钱没有，要命一条17．I call Li old big. toyear 25.我叫李老大，今年25。

搞笑神翻译1:南京青奥会的时候，发现《We Are the Champions》出场频率奇高！多么振奋人心的一首歌啊，直到发现有人把它翻译成了《我们都是昌平人》……2:昌平人就昌平人吧，介个勉强尚能接受！但是谁能告诉我《We Found Love》变成了《潍坊的爱》是怎么回事？你让我大潍坊人民情何以堪？3:《Young Girls》变成了《秧歌》，这么高大上的一首歌你们一定要翻译的这么接地气吗？《Open Heart》译成《开心》，告诉我你是怎么做到的！4:还有《Because You Love Me》变成《因为你是我的优乐美》，《We Need Medicine》变成了《我们不能放弃治疗》，《Wake Me Up When September Ends》变成了《一觉睡到国庆节》，咱能不能别闹了，咱能不能吃了药再出门！5:《Love Maze》译成《辣妹子》，《The Best of the Yardbirds》译成《绝味鸭脖》，《Follow Your Heart》译成《怂》，都好有道理，我们竟无言以对！6:《Against the Sun》翻译成《抗日》，《Man on the Moon》是《吴刚》，这样翻译合适吗？我读书少，你们不要骗我！“新乡”原来叫“New York”、“丹江口”原来叫“Red River Valley”、“青岛”原来叫“Greenland”。

祝福语大全： 7:看看还有哪些神翻译：8:经济economy依靠农民9:海关custom卡死他们10:地主landlord懒得劳动11:雄心ambition俺必胜12:强壮strong死壮13:羡慕admire额的妈呀14:脾气temper太泼15:怀孕pregnant扑来个男的16:救护车ambulance俺不能死17:律师lawyer捞呀18:Are you serious?(你是苏亚雷斯吗？)19:No,I am kidding.（不，我是凯丁。

最神级爆笑英语翻译Document serial number【NL89WT-NY98YT-NC8CB-NNUUT-NUT108】史上最神级爆笑英语翻译1、Youaskme,measkwho?你问我，我问谁?2、Wetwowhoandwho？咱俩谁跟谁啊！3、Howareyou?Howoldareyou?怎么是你，怎么老是你？4、youdon’tbirdme,Idon’tbirdyou你不鸟我，我也不鸟你5、Youhaveseed,Iwillgiveyousomecolortoseesee.你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧。

6、Wantmoneyno，wantlifeone!要钱没有，要命一条！7、Lovewhowho爱谁谁。

8、Igiveyoufaceyoudon’twannaface我给你脸你不要脸。

9、Horsehorsetigertiger马马虎虎10、nomoneynotalk没钱免谈11、YouGiveMeStop!你给我站住！12、bigonemother大姨妈13、letthehorsecomeon放马过来。

14、redfaceknowme红颜知己15、sevenupeightdown七上八下16、Nothreenofour不三不四17、IcallLioldbig.toyear25.我叫李老大，今年25。

18、heartflowerangryopen心花怒放19、drymother干妈20、youmeyoume彼此彼此21、Goodgoodstudy,daydayup.好好学习，天天向上。

22、Wherecoolwhereyoustay！哪凉快上哪呆着去。

23、Onecarcome,onecargo,twocarpengpeng,onecardied!(关于一场车祸的描述)24、Peoplemountainpeoplesea.人山人海。

英语爆笑笑话六篇带翻译笑死人的笑话是指以一句短语或一个小故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑，或是产生幽默感，另外一个行动(动作)型的笑话是以动作影响人的视觉及观感，而感到好笑。

一起来看看一些爆笑的英语笑话吧，带翻译哦1.The Looney BinLate one night at the insane asylum (疯人院)one inmate shouted, "I am Napoleon!”Another one said, "How do you know?"The first inmate said, "God told me!"Just then, a voice from another room shouted, "I did not!"疯人院一天晚上，在疯人院里，一个病人说：“我是拿破仑!”另一个说：“你怎么知道?”第一个人说：“上帝对我说的!”一会儿，一个声音从另一个房间传来：“我没说!”Notes:(1)Looney (俚语)疯子(2)inmate (n.同住者, 同室者(特指在医院、监狱))(3)insane asylum (疯人院)2.One day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to drive around the country roads, see how the farms looked, and perhaps to see how farmers earned their living. The city man saw a farmer in his yard, holding a pig up in his hands, and lifting it so that the pig could eat apples from an apple tree. The city man said to the farmer," I see that your pig likes apples, but isn"t that quite a waste of time?" The farmer replied," What"s time to a pig?"一天，有一个城市里的游客来到一个小乡村，在乡间路上开着车，想看看农庄是什么样子，也想看看农夫怎样种田过日子。

英语搞笑笑话12篇带翻译下面是店铺整理的英语搞笑笑话，以供大家学习参考。

英语搞笑笑话：传教士买鹦鹉A preacher is buying a parrotA preacher is buying a parrot.一个传教士在买鹦鹉。

"Are you sure it doesn't scream, yell, or swear?" asked the preacher.“你确信它不会尖叫，大叫或诅咒别人吗?”传教士问。

"Oh absolutely. He's a religious parrot," the storekeeper assures him.“噢，绝对不会。

它是一只虔诚的鹦鹉。

”店主向他保证。

"Do you see those strings on his legs? When you pull the right one, he recites the lord's prayer, and when you pull on the left he recites the 23rd Psalm."“你看见它腿上的那些细绳了吗?当你拉动右边这根，它会背诵天主经;当你拉动左边那根，它会背诵赞美诗。

”"Wonderful!" says the preacher, "but what happens if you pull both strings?"“太棒了!”传教士说，“但是如果我同时拉动两根绳子，会发生什么呢?”"I fall off my perch, you stupid fool!" screeched the parrot.“我会从树干上掉下去，你这个笨蛋!”鹦鹉尖声说道。

英语搞笑笑话：谁才是有色人种Dear white, something you got to know亲爱的白种人，有几件事你必须知道。

英语笑话6篇带翻译超级搞笑下面是店铺整理的英语笑话带翻译，欢迎大家阅读!英语笑话一：What does Santa Claus like to do in his garden?圣诞老人喜欢在花园里做什么?What does Santa Claus like to do in his garden?Answer: he likes to hoe, hoe, hoe圣诞老人喜欢在花园里做什么?答案：锄地。

(英文里Hoe 和ho同音。

hoe是锄草之意，ho则是圣诞老人的笑声。

)英语笑话二：Entering Heaven 进天堂Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates。

三名男子都死于平安夜，而后分别在天堂之门被圣彼得召见。

"In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."圣彼得说：“因为这个神圣的节日，你们每个人都必须有象征圣诞节的物品才能进入天堂”。

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle," he said. "You may pass through the pearly gates," Saint Peter said。

第一名男子从他得口袋里掏出了个打火机，他打燃打火机说：“它代表蜡烛”。

于是圣彼得就让他进入了天堂。

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells." Saint Peter said, "You may pass through the pearly gates."第二个男子从口袋里掏出一串钥匙，他把钥匙在手里摇了摇说：“它们是铃铛”圣诞老人也让他上了天堂。