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lo ve
谭俊
lov e
Intima cy pass ion commitme nt
Intima Closeness, cy: Connectedn ess,Bondin g
Passi Physical on: attraction, Sex
Commitme nt:
Decision, Period of time
Hello boys and girls, I am TJ and my topic is love today. Maybe someone had already done before, but I find some interesting new about this and I want to share with you, you will like it. I think love is an emotion. It is fun to talk about. I’m going to talk about are really focused more on attraction than love. Who finds each other of romantic interest that might then develop into a love relationship. Robet Sternberg who is now the deem at Tufts University, and he has a theory of love that argues that love is made of three components, intimacy, passion, and commitment or that is sometimes called decision. And these are relatively straightforward. He argued that you don’t have love if you don’t have all three of these elements. Intimacy is the feeling of closeness, of connectedness with someone, of bonding. Operationally you could think of intimacy as you share secrets. You share information with this person that you don’t share with anybody else. That’s really what intimacy is. Second element is passion. Passion is what you think it is. Passion is that we would say the drive that leads to romance. You can think of it as physical attraction or sex. Sternberg argues that this is a required component of a love relationship. The third element of love in Sternberg’s theory is decision or commitment. The decision that one is in a love relationship, the willingness to label it as such and a commitment to maintain that relationship, at least for some period of time. Take Sternberg’s three elements of love, intimacy, passion, and commitment, and I’ve listed out the different kinds of relationships. Some of these are pretty obvious and interesting. If you don’t have intimacy, if you don’t have passion, if you don’t have commitment, you don’t have love. Then we call non-love. That say is the relationship you now have to the person sitting next to you, presuming that you’re sitting next to a random person that you didn’t know from our college, is probably non-love. That says you are strangers. Share secrets, passion, we feel physically attracted to each other, but we’re not making any commitments here, that calls ‘romantic love’. This is physical attraction with close bonding but no commitment. Romeo and Juliet when they first met this is all familiar when relationship starts. We like each other, I’m physically attracted to each other, I enjoy spending time with you, but I’m not making any long-term commitments. So I’m not even willing to use the ‘L’ word in describing. Many of us might have been in relationship of this sort. That’s ‘romantic love’. Now, what if you have intimacy, we share secrets with each other but there is no particular physical attraction, but we are really committed to this relationship. This is what Sternberg calls ‘companionate love’. This is your best friend. We are committed to sharing intimacy to being friends forever. But physical attraction is not part of the equation here. All right, what if we have passion. I’m sexually attracted to you but no intimacy. I don’t want to really know that much about you. I don’t want to really share anything of me with you, but I am committed to maintain this physical attraction to you, well that calls ‘fatuous love’. It’s a whir wind courtship. It’s a film romance. It might lead to a shotgun wedding. That’s ‘fatuous love’. We are basically committed to each other for sex, but, It is very hard to make those relationships last a long time, because we might not have anything in common, we might not share anything with each other, we might not trust each other, we are not particularly bonded to each other. On the other hand, if you have all three, intimacy, passion, commitment, that is ‘consummate love’. Hey, that person is the one you can marry a whole time of life. Actually, this kind of love is the most important one. At last, I hope all of you, no matter whether you are in love, can catch a ‘consummate love’, a complete love.
Nonlov e
Romantic love
Companionat e love
Fatuous love
Hale Waihona Puke Consummate love
To love and to cherish Get marry
Thank s!
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