荷塘月色---译文对比(三种英译文）
朱自清
这几天心里颇不宁静。今晚在院子里坐着乘凉，忽然想起日日走过的荷塘，在这满月的光里，总该另有一番样子吧。月亮渐渐地升高了，墙外马路上孩子们的欢笑，已经听不见了；妻在屋里拍着闰儿，迷迷糊糊地哼着眠歌。我悄悄地披了大衫，带上门出去。
沿着荷塘，是一条曲折的小煤屑路。这是一条幽僻的路；白天也少人走，夜晚更加寂寞。荷塘四面，长着许多树，蓊蓊郁郁的。路的一旁，是些杨柳，和一些不知道名字的树。没有月亮的晚上，这路上阴森森的，有些怕人。今晚却很好。虽然月光也还是淡淡的。
曲曲折折的荷塘上面，弥望的是田田的叶子。叶子出水很高，像亭亭的舞女的裙。层层的叶子中间，零星地点缀着些白花，有袅娜地开着的，有羞涩地打着朵儿的；正如一粒粒的明珠，又如碧天里的星星，又如刚出浴的美人。微风过处，送来缕缕清香，仿佛远处高楼上渺茫的歌声似的。这时候叶子与花也有一丝的颤动，像闪电般，霎时传过荷塘的那边去了。叶子本是肩并肩密密地挨着，这便宛然有了一道凝碧的波痕。叶子底下是脉脉的流水，遮住了，不能见一些颜色；而叶子却更见风致了。
月光如流水一般，静静地泻在这一片叶子和花上。薄薄的青雾浮起在荷塘里。叶子和花仿佛在牛乳中洗过一样；又像笼着轻纱的梦。虽然是满月，天上却有一层淡淡的云，所以不能朗照；但我以为这恰是到了好处——酣眠固不可少，小睡也别有风味的。月光是隔了树照过来的，高处丛生的灌木，落上参差的斑驳的黑影，峭楞楞如鬼一般；弯弯的杨柳的稀疏的倩影，像是画在荷叶上。塘中的月色并不均匀；但光与影有着和谐的旋律，如梵婀玲上奏着的名曲。荷塘的四面，远远近近，高高低低都是树,而杨柳最多。这些树将一片荷塘重重围住;只在小路一旁,漏着几段空隙,像是特为月光留下的,树色一例是阴阴的,乍看像一团烟雾;但杨柳的丰姿，便在烟雾里也辨得出。树梢上隐隐约约的是一带远山，只有些大意罢了。树缝里也漏着一两点路灯光，没精打采的，是瞌睡人的眼。这时候最热闹的，要数树上的蝉声与水里的蛙声，但热闹是他们的，我什么也没有。
忽然想起采莲的事情来了。采莲是江南的旧俗，似乎很早就有，而六朝时为盛；从诗歌里可以约略知道。于是又记起《西洲曲》里的句子：
采莲南塘秋，
莲花过人头；
低头弄莲子，
莲子青如水。
今晚若有采莲人，这儿的莲花也算得“过人头”了；只不见一些流水的影子，是不行的。这令我到底惦着江南了。——这样想着，猛一抬头，不觉已是自己的门前；轻轻地推门进去，什么声息也没有，妻已睡熟好久了。
朱纯深译文
I have felt quite upset recently. Tonight, when I was sitting in the yard enjoying the cool, it occurred to me that the Lotus Pond, which I pass by everyday, must assume quite a different look in such moonlit night. A full moon was rising high in the sky; the laughter of children playing outside had died away; in the room, my wife was patting the son, Run-er, sleepily humming a
cradle song. Shrugging on an overcoat, quietly, I made my way out, closing the door behind me. Alongside the Lotus Pond runs a small cinder footpath. It is peaceful and secluded here, a place not frequented by pedestrians even in the daytime; now at night, it looks more solitary, in a lush, shady ambience of trees all around the pond. On the side where the path is, there are willows, interlaced with some others whose names I do not know. The foliage, which, in a moonless night, would loom somewhat frighteningly dark, looks very nice tonight, although the moonlight is not more than a thin, greyish veil.
All over this winding stretch of water, what meets the eye is a silken field of leaves, reaching rather high above the surface, like the skirts of dancing girls in all their grace. Here and there, layers of leaves are dotted with white lotus blossoms, some in demure bloom, others in shy bud, like scattering pearls, or twinkling stars, or beauties just out of the bath. A breeze stirs, sending over breaths of fragrance, like faint singing drifting from a distant building. At this moment, a tiny thrill shoots through the leaves and flowers, like a streak of lightning, straight across the forest of lotuses. The leaves, which have been standing shoulder to shoulder, are caught trembling in an emerald heave of the pond. Underneath, the exquisite water is covered from view, and none can tell its colour; yet the leaves on top project themselves all the more attractively.
The moon sheds her liquid light silently over the leaves and flowers, which, in the floating transparency of a bluish haze from the pond, look as if they had just been bathed in milk, or like a dream wrapped in a gauzy hood. Although it is a full moon, shining through a film of clouds, the light is not at its brightest; it is, however, just right for me - a profound sleep is indispensable, yet a snatched doze also has a savour of its own. The moon light is streaming down through the foliage, casting bushy shadows on the ground from high above, dark and checkered, like an army of ghosts; whereas the benign figures of the drooping willows, here and there, look like paintings on the lotus leaves. The moonlight is not spread evenly over the pond, but rather in a harmonious rhythm of light and shade, like a famous melody played on a violin.
Around the pond, far and near, high and low, are trees. Most of them are willows. Only on the path side can two or three gaps be seen through the heavy fringe, as if specially reserved for the moon. The shadowy shapes of the leafage at first sight seem diffused into a mass of mist, against which, however, the charm of those willow trees is still discernible. Over the trees appear some distant mountains, but merely in sketchy silhouette. Through the branches are also a couple of lamps, as listless as sleepy eyes. The most lively creatures here, for the moment, must be the cicadas in the trees and the frogs in the pond. But the liveliness is theirs, I have nothing.
Suddenly, something like lotus-gathering crosses my mind. It used to be celebrated as a folk festival in the South, probably dating very far back in history, most popular in the period of Six Dynasties. We can pick up some outlines of this activity in the poetry. Then I recall those lines in Ballad of Xizhou Island:
Gathering the lotus, I am in the South Pond,
The lilies in autumn reach over my head;
Lowering my head I toy with the lotus seeds.
Look, they are as fresh as the water underneath.
If there were somebody gathering lotuses tonight, she could tell that the lilies here are high enough to reach over her head; but one would certainly miss the sight of the water. So my memories drift back to the South after all. Deep in my thoughts, I looked up, just to find myself at the door of my own house. Gently I pushed the door open and walked in. Not a sound inside, my wife had been
fast asleep for quite a while.
王椒升译文
Of late, I have been in a rather uneasy frame of mind. Sitting in my courtyard enjoying the cool evening, I suddenly thought of the lotus pond that I pass on my way day in and day out. Tonight, it must have a charm all its own, bathed in the light of the full moon. The moon was now rising slowly. Beyond the wall, the happy laughter of children on the road had died away. So putting on my coat quietly, I went out closing the door softly behind me.
A path paved with coal-dust zigzags along the lotus pond, so secluded as to be little frequented in the daytime, to say nothing of its loneliness at night. Around the pond grows a profusion of luxuriant trees. On one side of the path are some willows and other plants whose names are unknown to me. On moonless nights, the place has a gloomy, somewhat forbidding appearance. But on this particular evening, it had a cheerful outlook, though the moon was pale.
On the uneven surface of the pond, all one could see was a mass of leaves, all interlaced and shooting high above the water like the skirts of slim dancing girls. The leaves were dotted in between the layers with white flowers, some blooming gracefully; others, as if bashfully, still in bud. They were like bright pearls and stars in an azure sky. Their subtle fragrance was wafted by the passing breeze, in whiffs airy as he notes of a song coming faintly from some distant tower. There was a tremor on leaf and flower, which, with the suddenness of lightning, soon drifted to the far end of the pond. The leaves, jostling and overlapping, produced, as it were, a wave of deep green. Under the leaves, softly hidden from view, water was rippling even its colour was not discernible so that the leaves looked more enchanting.
Moonlight was flowing quietly like a stream down to the leaves and flowers. A light mist overspread the lotus pond. Leaf and flower seemed washed in milk. Moolight was glowing from behind the trees, and the dense shrubs above cast down gloomy ghostlike shadows of varying lengths and shades of colour. But the beautiful sparse shadows of the arching willows were like a picture etched on the lotus leaves. Uneven as was the moonlight over the pond, there was a harmony between light and shade, rhythmic as a well-known melody played on the violin. Skirting the lotus pond, far and near, high and low, are trees among which willows predominate. They entirely envelop the pond, leaving only a few spaces on one side of the path, as if purposely for the moonbeams to penetrate. The trees were now all enshrouded in a heavy gloom, which at first sight looked like a pall of mist, but the lovely shape of the willows remained distinguishable in spite of it. Distant hills loomed above the tree-tops in dim outline. Here and there, a few rays from street-lamps filtered through the trees, listless as the eyes of one who is dozing. At this moment, most lively were the cicadas chirping in the trees and the frogs croaking under the water. But theirs was all the merry-making, in which I did not have the least share.
Then all of a sudden, I was reminded of the custom of plucking lotus seeds prevalent in Jiangnan, handed down probably from a very remote period and becoming quite popular during the Six Dynasties, as may be seen roughly in songs and poems that survive. This in turn revived my memory of the following lines in the “West Islet Ditty”:
In autumn I pluck lotus seeds in the South Pond,
Tall are the lotus plants, taller than me.
My head bent low, with lotus seeds I play,
Green, green as water all the lotus seeds I see.
If there were people plucking lotus seeds here tonight, they might indeed find lotus plants exceeding them in height; but the absence of the merest shadow of flowing water would spoil it. And that is what has set me thinking about Jiangnan.
《中国文学》译文
The last few days have found me very restless. This evening as I sat in the yard to enjoy the cool, it struck me how different the lotus pool I pass every day must look under a full moon. The moon was sailing higher and higher up the heavens, the sound of childish laughter had died away from the lane beyond our wall, and my wife was in the house patting Run’er and humming a lullaby to him. I quietly slipped on a long gown, and walked out leaving the door on the latch.
A cinder-path winds along by the side of the pool. It is off the beaten track and few pass this way even by day, so at night it is still more quiet. Trees grow thick and bosky all around the pool, with willows and other trees I cannot name by the path. On nights when there is no moon the track is almost terrifyingly dark, but tonight it was quite clear, though the moonlight was pale.
As far as eye could see, the pool with its winding margin was covered with trim leaves, which rose high out of the water like the flared skirts of dancing girls. And starring these tiers of leaves were white lotus flowers, alluringly open or bashfully in bud, like glimmering pearls, stars in an azure sky, or beauties fresh from the bath. The breeze carried past gusts of fragrance, like the strains of a song faintly heard from a far-off tower. And leaves and blossoms trembled slightly, while in a flash the scent was carried away. As the closely serried leaves bent, a tide of opaque emerald could be glimpsed. That was the softly running water beneath, hidden from sight, its colour invisible, though the leaves looked more graceful than ever.
Moonlight cascaded like water over the lotus leaves and flowers, and a light blue mist floating up from the pool made them seem washed in milk or caught in a gauzy dream. Though the moon was full, a film of pale clouds in the sky would not allow its rays to shine through brightly; but I felt this was all to the good --- though refreshing sleep is indispensable, short naps have a charm all their own. As the moon shone from behind them, the dense trees on the hills threw checkered shadows, dark forms loomed like devils, and the sparse, graceful shadows of willows seemed painted on the lotus leaves. The moonlight on the pool was not uniform, but light and shadow made up a harmonious rhythm like a beautiful tune played on a violin.
Far and near, high and low around the pool were trees, most of them willows. These trees had the pool entirely hemmed in, the only small clearings left being those by the path, apparently intended for the moon. All the trees were sombre as dense smoke, but among them you could make out the luxuriant willows, while faintly above the tree-tops loomed distant hills --- their general outline only. And between the trees appeared one or two street lamps, listless as the eyes of someone drowsy. The liveliest sounds at this hour were the cicadas chirruping on the trees and the frogs croaking in the pool; but this animation was theirs alone, I had no part in it.
Then lotus-gathering flashed into my mind. This was an old custom south of the Yangtze, which apparently originated very early and was most popular in the period of the Six Kingdoms, as we see from the songs of the time. I remember some lines from the poem West Islet:
When they gather lotus at Nantang in autumn
The lotus blooms are higher than their heads;
They stoop to pick lotus seeds,
Seeds as translucent as water.
If any girls were here now to pick the lotus, the flowers would reach above their heads too --- ah, rippling shadows alone are not enough! I was feeling quite homesick for the south, when I suddenly looked up to discover I had reached my own door. Pushing it softly open and tiptoeing in, I found all quiet inside, and my wife fast asleep
朱自清《荷塘月色》赏析 立真言、写真景、抒真情 ——朱自清《荷塘月色》赏析 孙恒星 中学教材散文单元所选的文章都是些借景抒情，托物言志之类的作品，即所谓的狭义的散文，文史亦称美文。在这些美文中，朱自清的《荷塘月色》更显美得纯洁，美得成熟。 《荷》文之所以美，就在于作品营造出了一个深邃清幽的意境。散文的意境有三个必备的要素，即语言的真切，景物的真实，情感的真挚。本文正是以真切的语言描绘一幅真实的景物，抒发出了长期郁积于内心深处的真挚的情感。赏析本文也就必须从这“三真”入手，而在这“三真”中，对语言的真切的分析又当为揭示其他“二真”的必由门径。 一以真言写真景 《荷塘月色》描写了哪些景物呢？文题标得明白：一是荷塘，一是月色。在历代诗文中写荷塘的不少，写月色的更多。但本文的“荷塘”、“月色”绝对区别于其他的“荷塘”、“月色”。这里的荷塘不会是“接天莲叶无穷碧，映日荷花别样红”；这里的月色也不能是“玉户帘中卷不去，捣衣砧上拂还来”。这里的荷塘是“月下的荷塘”，这里的月色是“荷塘的月色”。正因为作品鲜明地突出了景物的特色，生动真实地再现了特定环境下了特定景物，文章所要抒发的真挚感情才有可靠的寄托，才让读者感到真实亲切。 先看对荷叶的描写：“叶子出水很高，象亭亭的舞女的裙。”如果我们抛开特定的环境，用“青翠的玉盘”来比喻荷叶行吗？当然行，而且表现力还相当强。这样的描写既绘出了荷叶的色，又表现了荷叶的质，还状摹了荷叶的形。然而这种比喻只好在朝霞、夕照里，或蒙蒙细雨中，绝不能在淡淡在月光下。夜不辨色，更难辨质，月色中所见的荷叶，主要是其自然舒展的形态，与裙十分相似。 写荷花，原文连用了三个比喻：“层层的叶子中间，零星地点缀着些白花，有袅娜地开着的，有羞涩地打着朵儿的；正如一粒粒明珠，又如碧天里的星星，又如刚出浴的美人。”文章在收入教材时删去了最后一喻。这一喻有什么不妥呢？荷花娇艳华贵，堪以美人作比。宋代诗人杨成里的《莲花》诗中就有“恰如汉殿三千女，半是浓妆半淡妆”的句子。但在这里不行。朦胧的月色中把荷花看成美人，而且是刚出浴的，这样的感觉肯定不是真实的。相反，若不是在朦胧的月色中，而将荷花比作“明珠”和“星星”也有几分牵强。 文章这样描写荷香：“微风过处，送来缕缕清香，仿佛远处高楼上渺茫的歌声似的。”这种断断续续，似有似无的感觉绝不会产生于书声琅琅的清晨，也不会产生于阳光刺目的中午，只能产生于“墙外马路上孩子们的欢笑，已经听不见了”的寂静的月夜。我们再看另一个写花香的句子：“这里除了光彩，还有淡淡的清香，香气似乎也是淡紫色的，梦幻一般轻轻地笼罩着我。”（《紫藤萝瀑布》）这是灿烂阳光下的花香，紫色的花儿正“在和阳光互相挑逗”着，满目耀眼的紫色刺激得作者生出“香气也是淡紫色的”这样的感觉显得十分自然。 直接描写月光的只有一句，本文多是以影写月，这也是被历代文人所称道的表现技法。“高处丛生的灌木，落下参差的斑驳的黑影；弯弯的杨柳的倩影，却又象是画在荷叶上。塘中的月色并不均匀；但光与影有着和谐的旋律，如梵阿玲上奏着的名曲。”这里的黑影参差且斑驳，给人一种摇荡起伏的去感。为什么？就因为它是落在荷塘里。荷塘里“微风过处……叶子与花也有一丝的颤动，象闪电般，霎时传过荷塘那边去了，叶子本是肩并肩密密地挨着，这便宛然有了一道凝碧的波痕。”黑影落在这波痕上面，当然更显参差和斑驳。也正因为荷塘处于这种动态，杨柳的倩影才象“画”而不是“印”在荷叶上。也正因为有了那道凝碧的波痕，光与影才现出一条条五线谱似的曲线，让人联想到“梵阿玲上奏着的名曲”。 二以真言抒真情
荷塘月色 朱自清 这几天心里颇不宁静。今晚在院子里坐着乘凉，忽然想起日日走过的荷塘，在这满月的光里，总该另有一番样子吧。月亮渐渐地升高了，墙外马路上孩子们的欢笑，已经听不见了；妻子在屋里拍着润儿，迷迷糊糊地哼着眠歌。我悄悄地披了大衫，带上门出去。 Moonlight over the Lotus Pond It has been rather disquieting these days. Tonight , when I was sitting in the yard enjoying the cool, it occurred to me that the Lotus Pond, which I pass by every day, must assume quite a different look in such moonlit night. A full moon was rising high in the sky; the laughter of children playing outside had died away; in the room, my wife was patting the son, Run-er, sleepily humming a cradle song. Shrugging on an overcoat, quietly, I made my way out, closing the door behind me. The Moonlit Lotus Pond These past few days I have been exceedingly restless. This evening, as I sat in my courtyard enjoying the cool night air, I suddenly thought of the lotus pong along which I was used to taking daily walks, and I imagined that it must look quite different under the light of this full moon. Slowly the moon climbed in the sky, and beyond the wall the laughter of children playing on the road could no longer be heard. My wife was inside patting Runer (The name of one of the author’s children) as she hummed a faint lullaby. I gently threw a wrap over my shoulders and walked out, closing the gate behind me. 沿着荷塘，是一条曲折的小煤霄路。这是一条幽僻的路；白天也少人走，夜晚更加寂寞。荷塘四面，长着许多树，蓊蓊郁郁的。路的一旁，是些柳，和一些不知道名字的树。没有月光的晚上，这路上阴森森的，有些怕人。今晚却很好，虽然月光也还是淡淡的。 Alongside the Lotus Pond runs a small cinder footpath. It is peaceful and secluded here, a place not frequented by pedestrians even in the daytime; now at night, it looks more solitary, in a lush, shady ambience of trees all around the pond. On the side where the path is, there are willows, interlaced with some others whose names I do not know the foliage, which, in a moonless night, would loom somewhat frighteningly dark, looks very nice tonight, although the moonlight is not more than a thin, greyish veil. Bordering the pond is a meandering little cinder path. It is a secluded path; during the day few people use it, and at night it is even lonelier. There are great numbers of trees growing on all sides of the lotus pond,
赏析《荷塘月色》的景物描写： 本文景物描写的特点，在于将描写荷塘和描写月色巧妙地结合起来。荷塘，是月下的荷塘;月色，是荷塘上的月色，突出了优雅、朦胧、幽静之美。第四、五段最能体现这种美。如：“层层的叶子中间，零星地点缀着些白花，有袅娜开着的，有羞涩地打着朵儿的;正如一粒粒的明珠，又如碧天里的星星，又如刚出浴的美人。微风过处，送来缕缕清香，仿佛远处高楼上渺茫的歌声似的。”这个段没有写月，但处处有月，荷叶、荷花，都处在朦胧的月光中，有着奇异的光彩。把盛开的和含苞欲放的白花比喻成“明珠”“星星”，从色彩和光华上写荷花之美。写荷花的缕缕清香，微风传送，像远方飘来的歌声一样似有似无，时断时续，捉摸不定。这幽雅淡远的感受也只能在月夜独处时才会有，如在嘈杂的白天，绝不会有这样的感受。荷香本是嗅觉形象，作者却把它比喻成“远处高楼上渺茫的歌声”，使其转化为听觉形象，这种把一种感觉的形象转化为另一种感觉的形象的写法，在修辞学上称为“通感”或“联觉”。使用这种修辞方法，能够启发读者更加广阔长远的想像和联想，让读者从各自的生活经历和文化素养出发，去领会小说诗歌文学作品的思想内容和艺术境界。又如：“月光如流水一般，静静地泻在这个片叶子和花上。薄薄的青雾浮起在荷塘里。叶子和花仿佛在牛乳中洗过一样;又像笼着轻纱的梦。”把荷叶和荷花放在月光的背景下，一个“泻”字，给人一种奶白色而又鲜明欲滴的实感;一个“浮”字，又表现出月光下荷叶、荷花那种缥缈轻柔的姿容。作者是通过写叶、花的安谧、恬静，衬托出月色的朦胧柔和。又如：“月光是隔了树照过来的，高处丛生的灌木，落下参差的斑驳的黑影，峭愣愣如鬼一般;弯弯的杨柳的稀疏的倩影，却又像是画在荷叶上。”这里写“黑影”和“倩影”，还是写月色，因为影是月光照射在物体上产生的。树影明暗掩映，错落有致，反衬月光轻盈荡漾。月色本是难以描摹的，但作者透过不同的景物，从不同的角度去写月色，使难状之景如在眼前。
《荷塘月色》两译文赏析 散文翻译原则 ●1、文气贯通,气韵生动 ●英国散文翻译家 Hilaire Belloc(希莱尔·贝洛克)为文学散文翻译制定了6 条原 则，认为翻译的本质是异地之魂假借本地之躯的复活 (The essence of translating is the resurrection of an alien thing in a native body) ,强调散文的翻译不能拘泥于原文之字句,要视段落或部分为整体。翻译要“以意译意( translate intention by intention) ” ●2、传神写照———“意,气,文”三位一体 ●在散文翻译中,我们要想译得曲尽其妙,须得传神地摹写作者的气质神韵。每一个 作者有每一个的个性特点、气质精神,着手翻译之前,要先对作者进行深入的研究,把握其时代背景、人生经历、创作风格等,这样的翻译方能做到传神达意,否则,难免貌合神离。 ●PS：文学翻译非文字翻译 ●文学翻译，讲求整体效果，即“神韵”。有些表面忠实的译文，失去了散文的文采、 文雅，这样便失去了自身的价值，终究是失败的译文。 “美”是散文翻译的重点。 美感层面 ●Alongside the Lotus Pond runs a small cinder footpath. It is peaceful and secluded here, a place not frequented by pedestrians even in the daytime; now at night, it looks more solitary, in a lush, shady ambience of trees all around the pond. On the side where the path is, there are willows, interlaced with some others whose names I do not know. The foliage, which, in a moonless night, would loom somewhat frighteningly dark, looks very nice tonight, although the moonlight is not more than a thin, greyish veil. （朱纯深译文） ●动感美：run、frequent、interlace、loom ●韵味美：peaceful、secluded、solitary、lush、shady ●比喻手法：…a thin, greyish veil . 美感层面 ●All over this winding stretch of water, what meets the eye is a silken field of leaves, reaching rather high above the surface, like the skirts of dancing girls in all their grace. Here and there, layers of leaves are dotted with white lotus blossoms, some in demure bloom, others in shy bud, like scattering pearls, or twinkling stars, or beauties just out of the bath. A breeze stirs, sending over breaths of fragrance, like faint singing drifting from a distant building. At this moment, a tiny thrill shoots through the leaves and flowers, like a streak of lightning, straight across the forest of lotuses. The leaves, which have been standing shoulder to shoulder, are caught trembling in an emerald heave of the pond. Underneath, the exquisite water is covered from view, and none can tell its colour; yet the leaves on top project themselves all the more attractively.（朱纯深译文） ●音韵效果 (节奏美）： ● stirs---sending---singing； ● breeze---breaths---building；
《荷塘月色》译文赏析 朱自清先生一直认为，散文就应该是画，是“以文字作画”，而《荷塘月色》就是“用文字作画”的范本，甚至被称为“是梦娜丽莎微笑似”的美文。该篇散文文笔优美，寓情于景，情景交融，出神入化，宛如一幅逼真的山水名画。语言充满音乐美和绘画美，读起来令人心旷神怡。所以要成功翻译这篇散文，译者必须要再现原文的艺术美感，即“换一种文字作画”。 而幸运的是朱先生的译文Moonlight Over the Lotus Pond则再现原文内容和形式方面达到了“化境”，既保留了散文的形式，又很好的把握了作者了细腻的感情，从而使译文同时具有很强的艺术美感。钱钟书先生评价译文没有因“不同语言习惯的差异而露出生硬牵强的痕迹，感觉读起来在读原汁原味的写景状物的英语散文。 下面将从以下几个方面具体分析译文是怎么达到化境效果的。 首先，文章一开头就点出了全文的“文眼”：“这几天心里颇不宁静。”作者想借游览荷塘来排解自己苦闷的心情，于是从一开始就以独处的心境创造出孤寂的氛围，流露出淡淡的哀愁，给整篇文章定下基调。 下面看一下译文：这是一条幽僻的路；白天也少人走，夜晚更加寂寞。荷塘四周，长着许多树，蓊蓊郁郁的。路的一旁，是些杨柳，和一些不知道名字的树。没有月光的晚上，这路上阴森森的，有些怕人。今晚却很好，虽然月光也还是淡淡的。
朱纯深译文：It is peaceful and secluded here, a place not frequented by pedestrians even in the daytime; now at night, it looks more solitary, in a lush, shady ambience of trees all around the pond. On the side where the path is, there are willows, interlaced with some others whose names I do not know. The foliage, which, in a moon less night, would loom somewhat frighteningly dark, looks very nice tonight, although the moonlight is not more than a thin, grayish veil. 幽僻，寂寞，阴森森，淡淡等词语都营造一种孤寂的气氛，而译文中peaceful and secluded，solitary，grayish veil ，很好传达了孤寂的氛围，流露出淡淡的哀愁，符合整篇文章的基调。 其次，《荷塘月色》的绘画美和音乐美主要是通过大量叠 音词、平行结构、比喻等修辞手法的使用体现出 来。朱先生的译文基本保留了原文的修辞手法和表现形式，达到了与原文相同的表达效果。 ㈠叠词的运用，《荷塘月色》之所以成为美文，大量叠音词 的使用起了很大作用，这也是该文的一大语特色。比如：曲曲折 折的荷塘，缕缕的清香，脉脉的流水，峭楞楞的黑影。在翻译时 朱先生采取了多种方法翻译这些叠音词，尽量保留了这些叠音词 带给读者的美感。 ⑴头韵法如：树色一例是阴阴的—— the leafage，树梢上隐隐约约的是一带远山，只有些大意罢了—
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原文： 荷塘月色 朱自清 这几天心里颇不宁静。今晚在院子里坐着乘凉，忽然想起日日走过的荷塘，在这满月的光里，总该另有一番样子吧。月亮渐渐地升高了，墙外马路上孩子们的欢笑，已经听不见了；妻在屋里拍着闰儿，迷迷糊糊地哼着眠歌。我悄悄地披了大衫，带上门出去。 沿着荷塘，是一条曲折的小煤屑路。这是一条幽僻的路；白天也少人走，夜晚更加寂寞。荷塘四面，长着许多树，蓊蓊郁郁的。路的一旁，是些杨柳，和一些不知道名字的树。没有月光的晚上，这路上阴森森的，有些怕人。今晚却很好，虽然月光也还是淡淡的。 路上只我一个人，背着手踱着。这一片天地好像是我的；我也像超出了平常的自己，到了另一个世界里。我爱热闹，也爱冷静；爱群居，也爱独处。像今晚上，一个人在这苍茫的月下，什么都可以想，什么都可以不想，便觉是个自由的人。白天里一定要做的事，一定要说的话，现在都可不理。这是独处的妙处；我且受用这无边的荷香月色好了。 曲曲折折的荷塘上面，弥望的是田田的叶子。叶子出水很高，像亭亭的舞女的裙。层层的叶子中间，零星地点缀着些白花，有袅娜地开着，有羞涩的打着朵儿的；正如一粒粒的明珠，又如碧天里的星星，又如刚出浴的美人。微风过处，送来缕缕清香，仿佛远处高楼上渺茫的歌声似的。这时候叶子与花也有一些的颤动，像闪电般，霎时传过荷塘的那边去了。叶子本是肩并肩密密的挨着，这便宛然有了一道凝碧的波痕。叶子底下是脉脉的流水，遮住了，不能见一些颜色；而叶子却更见风致了。 月光如流水一般，静静地泻在这一片叶子和花上。薄薄的青雾浮起在荷塘里。叶子和花仿佛在牛乳中洗过一样；又像笼着轻纱的梦。虽然是满月，天上却有一层淡淡的云，所以不能朗照；但我以为这恰是到了好处－－酣眠固不可少，小睡也别有风味的。月光是隔了树照过来的，高处丛生的灌木，落下参差的斑驳的黑影，却又像是画在荷叶上。塘中的月色并不均匀，但光与影有着和谐的旋律，如梵婀玲上奏着的名曲。 荷塘的四面，远远近近，高高低低的都是树，而杨柳最多。这些树将一片荷塘重重围住；只在小路一旁，漏着几段空隙，像是特为月光留下的。树色一例是阴阴的，乍看像一团烟雾；但杨柳的丰姿，便在烟雾里也辨得出。树梢上隐隐约约的是一带远山，只有些大意罢了。树缝里也漏着一两点路灯光，没精打彩的，是渴睡人的眼。这时候最热闹的，要数树上的蝉声与水里的蛙声；但热闹的是它们的，我什么也没有。
《荷塘月色》赏析 朱自清，这位现代文学史上的散文巨匠，以其朴素、平常、深沉和饱蘸真情的独特风格，奠定了他在现代文坛的地位。“在朱自清的全部散文中，最为光辉绚丽的篇章，应属他的抒情小品。作家的名字已经跟他的抒情名篇融为一体，密不可分。”（蔡清富《〈朱自清散文选集〉序言》）《荷塘月色》正是这样的美文。在这篇文章中，“作者以饱蘸着感情浆液的彩笔，情景交融地抒写了他特定时期的心情。”（同上）景移情转，融情入景，达到了情与景完美的统一，织就了朱自清散文中的一精粹。 作者一开头就这样写道：“这几天心里颇不宁静。”这正是本文的文眼，主旨所在，整个文章中都渗透着这种情绪。当时，国民党反动派继“四·一二”反革命政变之后，又发动了“四·一五”广州大屠杀。朱自清曾这样评论道：“近来广州的事变，杀了那么些人，烧了那么些房屋，也许是在恐怖的开始吧！”“在歧路之前，我只有彷徨罢了”，“那里走”这个问题，“只要有些余暇，它就来盘据心头，挥也挥不去”。（《那里走》）作者对反动派的暴行极其愤慨，但又对革命抱怀疑态度，看不清革命的前途，表现出极度的彷徨和烦闷。接着作者说夜已深了，孩子们都玩完回家了，“我”自然想起那清雅幽静的荷塘来，“在这满月的光里总该另有一番样子吧”。于是披衣出门，沿着“一条曲折的小煤屑路”，走向荷塘。更深月淡，杨柳蓊郁，这可人的景色怎不令人忘乎身外呢？世界是那样的令人窒息，何不在这美景中赢得片刻的逍遥？正如作者所说，“这一片天地好象是我的；我也象超出了平常的
自己，到了另一世界里”，“……这是独处的妙处；我且受用这无边的荷香月色好了”。 如果说以上是“我”刚刚进入景色，那么下面所描绘的“月下荷塘”和“塘上月色”则是作者完全把自己融入了了这“荷香月色”之中，完全“超出了平常的自己”，陶醉在这“荷塘月色”中了。对“月下荷塘”作者写到了田田的叶子、零星的白花、塘上的微风、缕缕的清香和叶下脉脉的流水，行文如流水，不紧不慢，娓娓道来，如轻风送来清香一样清新舒畅，又像密密的碧叶一样醇酽醉人。对“塘上月色”，作者写到如流水的月光、薄薄的轻雾、淡云中满月、参差斑驳的树影，用轻柔的笔触，皴画出一个朦胧的仙景，“如梵婀玲上奏着的名曲”。（对于本两段精巧的结构和多姿的笔法等这里不作探讨。） 醉人的美景完全是作者超脱中淡淡的喜悦，然而景转位移，这片刻的逍遥也应付被打破。以下作者的笔锋略一侧转，景与绪便开始了偏移。全面地观察荷塘的全貌，难舍塘中塘上的梦景，却也感到了身居景外；塘外的“远山”和“路灯”虽悄然无言，却引出那淡淡的愁绪上心头，“蝉声”与“蛙声”也就难引起人丝毫的兴致，只感到缠人的烦闹又伏上身来。 于是“忽然想起采莲的事情来了”，采莲的情景是详和舒心、热闹有趣的；刚刚领略了超脱的喜悦，怕敢触到那被现实折磨够了的心
关于《荷塘月色》三个英译本的赏析 杨冬 常熟理工学院外国语学院 朱自清以及《荷塘月色》的介绍 1921年4月12日，蒋介石为了反共产党，在上海制造了四一二惨案，白色恐怖笼罩着中国大地。鲁迅，钱玄同，胡适等知识分子陷入了苦闷彷徨中。朱自清也是其中之一。作为一名知识分子，他对现实非常不满但又无可奈何，不免陷入了无限的哀愁，彷徨中。一个仲夏之夜，他闲步荷塘，为美景所吸引，暂时忘记了现实。在这样的情况下，作者写下了寓情于景，情景交融的《荷塘月色》，记下了那时的超然于挣扎的矛盾心理。文章读起来能感觉到一种非常怡然自得的心境，当时就觉得是一种享受。朱自清先生一直认为，散文就应该是画，是“以文字作画”，而《荷塘月色》就是“用文字作画”的范本，朱自清先生写的语言充满韵律美和画面美，令人心旷神怡。因此，想要很好地诠释这篇散文，译文需要能再现原文的艺术美感，这是个巨大的挑战。 三个英译本的介绍 第一个译本由朱纯生先生翻译，他十分传神地传达了原文的美感，并在译本中选用了贴切的词语。第二个译本由杨宪益与戴乃迭完成。他们的翻译主要有以下的特征：首先是翻译的语言较为忠实于原文，。其次，由于中西文化相结合，译文语言洋味，他们的审美思想在《荷
塘月色》中很好的体现出来了。第三个译本是李明先生翻译的，也是最新版本，但相较前两位译者，实力相去甚远。 文章美在何处？ 一、文中叠词的大量运用 在原文中，叠词的使用使得原文在声音，夜景等方面展现了多重艺术美感，这也是本文“美”之处。对于叠词我们并不陌生，因为我们时常能在现代文学作品中看到叠词的使用，它能使语言更加生动形象，更具音律之美等。因此，《荷塘月色》之所以成为美文，大量叠音词的使用起到了推波助澜的作用，这也是该文的一大语言特色。但是在英语作品中，叠词的使用却是极为罕见的，也难以翻译。这使得中文中的叠词翻译成为英文，挑战倍增。在本文的英译本中，朱纯生使用形容词或副词而不用叠词，效果有目共睹，相较其杨宪益与李明效果更好。 比如： 1 曲曲折折的荷塘上面 All over the winding stretch of water The pool with it’s winding margin All over the pond with its winding margin 2 送来缕缕清香 Sending over breaths of fragrance Waft breaths of fragrance Carry past gusts of fragrance
《荷塘月色》三个英译本的对比赏析 摘要：翻译的历史十分悠久，许多学者也提出了不少翻译的原则与标准，如奈 达的功能对等理论等。纽马克也曾说过: “翻译批评是将翻译理论和翻译实践连接 在一起的一个重要环节”。而针对不同译本的对比研究正是翻译批评的一种。朱自清的《荷塘月色》是中文散文作品中不可多得的佳作之一，许多译者对此文章喜 爱有加，并进行了翻译，如朱纯深、王椒升、杨宪益和戴乃迭夫妇等。本文就以 奈达的功能对等理论为指导，以朱纯深翻译的译本、杨宪益和戴乃迭夫妇翻译的 译本和李明翻译的译本为研究对象，对比分析三个译本的翻译技巧和表达效果， 从而对各自译本的精妙和不足之处进行批评式鉴赏。 关键词：《荷塘月色》；散文翻译；功能对等；对比赏析 一、功能对等理论 功能对等理论是由美国著名的语言学家、翻译家、翻译理论家尤金·奈达提出的。奈达认为，翻译即是交际，对于翻译的评价不能仅仅停留在词汇、语法或修 辞的对应上面，重要的是接受者准确理解和欣赏译文的程度。 二、散文的特色及其翻译 散文的三大特色为“真” “情” “美”。散文的翻译如何做到“真、情、美”的再现呢? 朱纯深，杨宪益戴乃迭，李明的的译作再现了《荷塘月色》的神美、形美、 意境美，堪称经典译作。文章依据原文的特色，以功能对等理论对三个译本当中 的具有代表性的例句进行赏析，看着三个译本是如何将原文的美展现出来的。 例1. 原文：没有月光的晚上，这路上阴森森的，有些怕人。今晚却很好，虽 然月光也还是淡淡的。 朱译：The foliage, which, in a moonless night, would loom somewhat frighteningly dark, looks very nice tonight, although the moonlight is not more than a thin, grayish veil. 杨、戴译： On nights when there is no moon the track is almost terrifyingly dark, but tonight it was quite clear, though the moonlight was pale. 李译：On a moonless night, it is somewhat somber here, looking rather forbidding. But it has a cheerful outlook tonight, though the moonlight is in a thin, whitish veil. 英语造句离不开连词，而在英汉互译过程中，汉语则很少或不用这类词。这 三个译文文本中都译出了表示转折关系的连接词“虽然”，原文风格得以完美体现。 例2. 原文: 妻在屋里拍着润儿，迷迷糊糊地哼着眠歌。 朱译：...in the room, my wife was patting our son, Run’er, slee pily humming a cradle song. 杨、戴译：...and my wife was in the house patting Run’er and humming a lullaby to him. 李译：Inside our home, my wife was patting our son - Run’er, sleepily humming a cradle song. 通过对比分析，这三个译本在用词和结构上大致相同，而李的和朱译本中humming前有sleepily，这一词恰恰生动的传递出妻子睡意正浓，迷迷糊糊、半 睡半醒的状态，而杨戴的译本漏掉了迷迷糊糊。 例3. 原文：荷塘的四面，远远近近，高高低低都是树，而杨柳最多。 朱译：Around the pond, far and near, high and low, are trees. Most of them are willows.
《荷塘月色》片段 朱自清 曲曲折折的荷塘上面，弥望的是田田的叶子。叶子出水很高，像亭亭的舞女的裙。层层的叶子中间，零星地点缀着些白花，有袅娜地开着的，有羞涩地打着朵儿的；正如一粒粒的明珠，又如碧天里的星星，又如刚出浴的美人。微风过处，送来缕缕清香，仿佛远处高楼上渺茫的歌声似的。这时候叶子与花也有一丝的颤动，像闪电般，霎时传过荷塘的那边去了。叶子本是肩并肩密密地挨着，这便宛然有了一道凝碧的波痕。叶子底下是脉脉的流水，遮住了，不能见一些颜色；而叶子却更见风致了。 月光如流水一般，静静地泻在这一片叶子和花上。薄薄的青雾浮起在荷塘里。叶子和花仿佛在牛乳中洗过一样；又像笼着轻纱的梦。虽然是满月，天上却有一层淡淡的云，所以不能朗照；但我以为这恰是到了好处——酣眠固不可少，小睡也别有风味的。月光是隔了树照过来的，高处丛生的灌木，落下参差的斑驳的黑影；弯弯的杨柳的稀疏的倩影，像是画在荷叶上。塘中的月色并不均匀；但光与影有着和谐的旋律，如梵婀玲上奏着的名曲。 荷塘的四面，远远近近，高高低低，都是树，而杨柳最多。这些树将一片荷塘重重围住；只在小路一旁，漏着几段空隙，像是特为月光留下的。树色一例是阴阴的，乍看像一团烟雾；但杨柳的丰姿，便在烟雾里也得出。树梢上隐隐约约的是一带远山，只有些大意罢了。树缝里也漏着一两点路灯光，没精打彩的，是瞌睡人的眼。这时候最热闹的，要数树上的蝉声与水里的蛙声；但热闹是他们的，我什么也没有。 Upon the winding lotus pond, continuous and countless leaves come into sight. The leaves are high above water like gracious dancing girl’s dress. On the different layers of leaves scatter white flowers as ornament, some in bloom, some in shy bud, like some beads of blinking pearls, or twinkling stars in blue sky or beauties just out of bath. A breeze blowing, sends continuous fresh fragrance as vague singing from distant tall building. Just then, leaves and flowers get a quiver, like a streak of lightning, across to the other side of lotus pond. It causes a long green trace among the leaves which have been standing shoulder to shoulder. Beneath the leaves are murmuring water which is covered and unable to tell its color. However, leaves on op reveal more charm. As flowing water, moonlight spreads on this piece of leaves and flowers. Green mist rises from the lotus pond. The leaves and flowers seem just been washed in milk, or resemble veiled dreams. In spite of a full moon, light clouds flout in the sky, which refuse to give bright light. However, it is right for me—a sound sleep is indispensable, yet a nap has its own favor. The moon is beaming through clustered bush in the high position, casting uneven and motley shadow; while hooked willow leaves sparse beautiful shape as it is drawn on the lotus leaves. The moonlight is not well-distributed, however, it possesses harmonious melody with shade, like a famous song played on a violin. Four sides of the lotus pond, far to near, high to low, are all trees. Most of them are willows. These trees surround the lotus pond row by row, only beside the road leaving a few sections of gaps which is specially reserved for the moon. The trees seem a cloud of fog at first sight, as their color is dim with no exception. However,
《荷塘月色》赏析 《荷塘月色》是现代著名散文家朱自清的散文代表作。 朱自清（1898—1948），字佩弦，江苏扬州人。文学研究会成员中在诗歌和散文创作方面有特色、有成就的作家。代表性作品主要有长诗《毁灭》，诗文合集《踪迹》，散文集《背影》、《你我》、《温州的踪迹》、《欧游杂记》等。《荷塘月色》写于1927年7月，后收入散文集《背影》。 在过去的阐释中，许多人认为：《荷塘月色》作于大革命遭受挫折的白色恐怖的历史时期，作为一位正直的、怀着满腔爱国热忱的知识分子，他无疑是极为痛苦而为祖国深感忧虑的。作者对荷塘月色的描写既表现了作者内心的压抑、沉闷之情，以及对黑暗现实和反动统治的强烈不满；也表现了作者对现实的逃避，作者也正是想借淡月掩映下的荷塘景色，摆脱现实的烦恼，追求刹那安宁的心境；同时也体现了他追求美好、自由生活的理想。（钱谷融主编《中国现代文学作品选》华东师范大学出版社）。这样的理解具有它的合理性，但是这样的坐实又不可避免地造成了对这篇散文的误读。 作品中的“心里颇不宁静”既然没有明确说出是因大革命失败而来，就有多种可能，既可能原因在大革命失败，也可能原因在家庭琐事。总之，作者是想找一个“逃遁”之所。所以具有日常性的“日日走过的荷塘”、并不特别美的荷塘才会变得美伦美奂。这样的荷塘首先是自然的美，作者通过一系列的比喻、拟人都修辞手法，将自然的美与
诸如“舞女”“刚出浴的美人”“远处高楼飘来的歌声”“梵阿铃”等联系了 起来。荷塘之美被是清醇的，但是喻体却是艳冶的。在喻体与本体同时出现的表达方式，与其说是为了形容荷塘与月色，但同时也表现了艳冶的想象。但不管怎样，艳冶的梦想是在半遮半掩中表现出来的。接着作者进行了深度的时间性想象，即将想象由现实/荷塘引入历史和文化，写出历史上许多采莲的盛事来，直接地写出历史上与采莲有关的情事。先是写出皇家的采莲景况，引用了梁元帝《采莲赋》，写出“妖童媛女，荡舟心许”的热闹场景。但因为自己不是皇帝，而就是皇帝则事过时移，因此心里不免酸楚起来。于是又把自己放到平民的位置上写出民间采莲的情事：“采莲南塘秋，莲花过人头；低头弄莲子，莲子清如水。”迷恋过人头的莲花中，男女嬉戏，低头弄莲子相爱的场面。 无论是写现实中的荷塘的美，还是写历史上采莲的盛事，文本的总体指向都与娱乐有关。在写荷塘的现实部分，一系列的比喻，如“凡俄琳的歌声似的”“刚出浴的美人似的”，很显然是个体的欲望呈现。就是写历史上采莲的盛事，所想到的也都是与情爱有关涉的，如“妖童媛女，荡舟心许”和“低头弄莲子，莲子清如水”。历史上的情事，使“我”心旷神怡。即使意识到现实/今的逼迫，但也不想回到现实。 但就在他反复咀嚼“弄莲子”，细诉内心“爱子”的心意的时候，突然到了家门口。因为是如此的沉浸，以致忘却了现实，而当现实突然出现的时候，所以吓了一跳，因此文中才有“猛然抬头”之说。一切的爱情想象，面对这现实中熟睡的妻子——家庭以及家庭道德责任的时
荷塘月色 ——朱自清 【导入新课】 同学们之前学过那些有关荷花描写的句子，请说说。（杨万里《晓出净慈寺送林方子》：接天莲叶无穷碧，映日荷花别样红。杨万里《小池》：小荷才露尖尖角，早有蜻蜓立上头。周敦颐《爱莲说》：出淤泥而不染，濯青莲而不妖。）是的，古人对于荷花可谓是非常的喜爱，在他们的眼里，荷花不仅是一种自然的景物，更是一个人洁身自好气质的表现。那么，现代的人们对荷花又有着怎样的情趣。今天，我们就一起来学习朱自清的《荷塘月色》 一、听录音，标注字音。 【走进作者】 朱自清，字“佩弦”,原名自华，号秋实，取“春华秋实”之意，浙江绍兴人。为勉励自己在困境中不丧志，不灰心，保持清白，不与坏人同流合污，便取《楚辞·卜居》，“宁廉洁正直以自清”中“自清”二字，改名“朱自清”，着名诗人、作家、教授、民主战士。 同学们之前学过他的那些文章？ 散文名篇：《春》、《绿》、《背影》、《威尼斯》、《匆匆》、《荷塘月色》（1927.7）、《桨声灯影里的秦淮河》 主要作品有：《雪朝》（诗集），《踪迹》（诗与散文），《背影》（散文集），《欧游杂记》（散文集）。
【题解】 荷塘：指朱自清先生当时任教的北京清华大学清华园里的荷花池，是本文所要描绘的特定处所。 月色：月光。点明了时间,是一个有月亮的夜晚。月色是文章描绘的中心，它是作者心目中向往、追求的和谐宁静的境界。 1、这几天心里颇不宁静。今晚在院子里坐着乘凉，忽然想起日日走过的荷塘，在这满月的光里，总该另有一番样子吧。月亮渐渐地升高了，墙外马路上孩子们的欢笑，已经听不见了；妻在屋里拍着闰儿，迷迷糊糊地哼着眠歌。我悄悄地披了大衫，带上门出去。（段意：月夜前往荷塘的缘由） 思考：从全文看“这几天心里颇不宁静”起什么作用？如果不写心情，光去写月光与荷塘好不好？为什么？（奠定了全文的情感基调，是全文的文眼。作者的感情发展变化：心里颇不宁静——淡淡的月光下，有淡淡的哀愁——在自然美景中有有淡淡的喜悦——发出“我什么也没有”的感慨——惦记江南，欲超脱而不可得。如果不写心情，光写月光和荷塘，文章就仅是就是论事，就失去了神韵，“为文而文”则失去了意义。 文眼：指文中最能揭示主旨、升华意境、涵盖内容的关键性词句。它奠定文章的感情基调，确定文章的中心。 2、沿着荷塘，是一条曲折的小煤屑（xiè ）路。这是一条幽僻（pì）的路；白天也少人走，夜晚更加寂寞。荷塘四面，长着许多树，蓊蓊（wěng）郁郁的。路的一旁，是些杨柳，和一些不知道名字的树。没有月光的晚上，这路上阴森森的，有些怕人。今晚却很好，虽然月光也还是淡淡的。（通往荷塘的小路、树木、月色）