绝望主妇第一季第一集剧本

第一季第一集ploitWritten by Marc CherryDirected by Charles McDougall-NARRATOR: My name is Mary Alice Young.我是Mary Alice Young。

When you read this morning's paper, you may come across an article about the unusual day I had last week.come across: 偶然遇到article: 文章unusual: 不平常的当你浏览今天的晨报,可能会读到一篇文章关于上个星期我所渡过的不平常的一天。

Normally, there's never anything newsworthy about my life.normally：通常newsworthy: 有新闻价值的通常,我的生活里是没有什么有新闻报道价值的。

That all changed last Thursday.change: 改变但是上个星期四一切都改变了。

Of course everything seemed as normal at first.of course: 当然seem: 好像，仿佛normal: 平常as normal: 照常at first: 最初，开始时当然,起初,一切看起来都很平常。

I made my breakfast for my family.make: 做breakfast: 早饭我给一家人做好早餐。

-MARY ALICE: Here we are. Waffles.Waffles: 华夫饼干华夫饼来了。

-NARRATOR: I performed my chores.perform: 完成chore: (家庭或农庄的)杂务，杂活我做好了做家务。

-NARRATOR: I completed my projects.complete: 完成project: 设计【这里指美化家居】完成我的手工作品。

- MARY ALICE:: My name is Mary Alice Young.我是Mary Alice Young。

When you read this morning's paper, you may come across an article about the unusualday I had last week.come across: 偶然遇到article: 文章unusual: 不平常的当你浏览今天的晨报,可能会读到一篇文章关于上个星期我所渡过的不平常的一天。

Normally, there's never anything newsworthy about my life.normally：通常newsworthy: 有新闻价值的通常,我的生活里是没有什么有新闻报道价值的。

That all changed last Thursday.change: 改变但是上个星期四一切都改变了。

Of course everything seemed as normal at first.of course: 当然seem: 好像，仿佛normal: 平常as normal: 照常at first: 最初，开始时当然,起初,一切看起来都很平常。

I made my breakfast for my family.make: 做breakfast: 早饭我给一家人做好早餐。

-MARY ALICE: Here we are. Waffles.Waffles: 华夫饼干华夫饼来了。

- MARY ALICE: I performed my chores.perform: 完成chore: (家庭或农庄的)杂务，杂活我做好了做家务。

I completed my projects.complete: 完成project: 设计【这里指美化家居】完成我的手工作品。

I ran my errands.ran: 有步骤地进行errand: 差使,差事run errand: 跑腿完成我的使命。

-NARRATOR: My name is Mary Alice Young.When you read this morning's paper, you may come across an article about the unusual day I had last week.come across: 偶然遇到 article: 文章 unusual: 不平常的当你浏览今天的晨报,可能会读到一篇文章关于上个星期我所渡过的不平常的一天。

Normally, there's never anything newsworthy about my life.normally：通常 newsworthy: 有新闻价值的通常,我的生活里是没有什么有新闻报道价值的。

That all changed last Thursday.但是上个星期四一切都改变了。

Of course everything seemed as normal at first.of course: 当然 seem: 好像，仿佛 normal: 平常as normal: 照常 at first: 最初，开始时当然,起初,一切看起来都很平常。

I made my breakfast for my family.我给一家人做好早餐。

-MARY ALICE: Here we are. Waffles.Waffles: 华夫饼干华夫饼来了。

-NARRATOR: I performed my chores.perform: 完成 chore: (家庭或农庄的)杂务，杂活我做好了做家务。

-NARRATOR: I completed my projects.complete: 完成 project: 设计【这里指美化家居】完成我的手工作品。

--NARRATOR: I ran my errands.ran: 有步骤地进行 errand: 差使,差事 run errand: 跑腿完成我的使命。

My name is Mary Alice Young.我是Mary Alice Young.When you read this morning's paper, you may comeacross an article 当你浏览今天的晨报,可能会读到一篇文章about the unusual day I had last week.关于上个星期我所渡过的不平常的一天.Normally, there's never anything newsworthy about my life, 通常,我的生活里是没有什么有新闻报道价值的,but that all changed last thursday. 但是上个星期四一切都了.Of course, everything seemed quite normal at first.当然,起初,一切看起来都很平常.I made breakfast for my family. 我给一家人做好早餐.I performed my chores. 做家务.I completed my projects. 完成我的手工作品.I ran my errands. 完成我的使命.In truth, I spent the day as I spent every other day事实上, 和平时没什么不同--quietly polishing the routine of my life until it gleamed with perfection.一切都和往常一样,直到一件不寻常的事情的发生.That's why it was so astonishing when I decided to go to my hallway closet这就是为什么一切令人震惊,当我决定走向走廊的壁橱,and retrieve a revolver that had never been used. 拿起一把从没用过的左轮手枪.My body was discovered by my neighbor mrs. Martha Huber,我的尸体是被我的邻居Martha Huber发现的,who had been startled by a strange popping sound.她被一声奇怪的声音吓了一跳.Her curiosity aroused, 她觉得很好奇,mrs. Huber tried to think of a reason for dropping in on me unannounced. Huber太太想了一个来不请自来的理由.After some initial hesitation, 在犹豫了一会之后,she decided to return the blender she had borrowed from me six months before. 她决定来归还她6个月前从我这里借去搅拌器.It's my neighbor. I think she's been shot. 我的邻居,我觉得她被枪击了.There's blood everywhere. 到处都是血.Yes. You've got to send an ambulance. You've gotto send one right now.是的,赶紧派救护车,叫救护车.And for a moment, 过了一会之后,mrs. Huber stood motionless in her kitchen, Huber太太呆呆地站在厨房里,grief-stricken by this senseless tragedy...因为这件事情而感动极度悲伤...But only for a moment. 但是只有那么一会.If there was one thing mrs. Huber was known for, 如果说Huber最大的特点,it was her ability to look on the bright side. 就是她总能把事情往好的方面想.I was laid to rest on a monday. 星期一人们把我安葬了.After the funeral, all the residents of wisteria lane came to pay their respects.葬礼之后,所有住在wisteria lane人都来表示他们对我的怀念和尊敬.And, as people do in these situations, they brought food.就像人们在这种情况下通常会做的,他们送来点吃的.Lynette Scavo brought fried chicken. Lynette Scavo带了炸鸡.Lynette had a great family recipe for fried chicken.Lynette有一个大家庭,大家都喜欢炸鸡.Of course, she didn't cook much while she was moving up the corporate ladder. 当然,当她还是个职业女性的时候,她很少做饭.She didn't have the time.她没有时间.But when her doctor announced Lynette was pregnant,但是当她的医生告诉她怀孕了的时候,her husband Tom had an idea. 他的丈夫Tom想了个办法.Why not quit your job?为什么不辞职呢?Kids do better with stay-at-home moms. It would be so much less stressful." 妈妈待在家里带出来的孩子会比较好,而且这样压力也比较小.But this was not the case. 但是事实并非如此.In fact, Lynette's life had become so hectic,事实上,Lynette的生活变得如此兴奋,she was now forced to get her fried chicken froma fast-food restaurant.她不得不去快餐店买一只炸鸡.Lynette would have appreciated the irony if she stopped to think about it, Lynette 如果仔细想想,可能会明白这是反话,but she couldn't. She didn't have the time. 但是她不能,她没有时间.- Stop it ! - 住手! - But, mom! - 但是,妈妈! No, 不,you are going to behave today.你们今天乖一点.I am not going to be humiliated in front of the entire neighborhood.我不想在大家面前丢脸.And just so you know how serious I am...我是认真的...what's that? 这是什么?Santa's cell phone number. Santa的电话号码r.How'd you get that?你怎么知道的?I know someone who knows someone who knows an elf,我认识个朋友,她的朋友里有人认识一个小魔,and if any of you acts up, so help me, I will call Santa,所以,今天如果你们谁捣蛋,我马上打电话给Santa,and I will tell him you want socks for Christmas.我会告诉他,你们圣诞节只要短袜就可以了.You willing to risk that? 想试试么?Okay. Let's get this over with. 好,那么我们把这个收起来.Gabrielle Solis, who lives down the block, Gabrielle Solis,住在街区的后面,brought a spicy paella. 带了辣肉菜饭.Since her modeling days in New York, 自从她开始在纽约当模特以来,Gabrielle had developed a taste for rich food... 她对食物的品味渐渐提高... and rich men. 还有那些有钱的男人.Carlos, who worked in mergersnd acquisitions, proposed on their third date. 在他们第三次约会的时候跟她求婚.Gabrielle was touched when tears welled up in his eyes,当Gabrielle看见他眼眶中的泪水时,被感动了,but she soon discovered this happened 但是她很快发现every time Carlos closed the big deal.每当Carlos成功靠近一些大人物时都会这样.Gabrielle liked her paella piping hot.Gabrielle喜欢她那些新鲜的肉菜饭.However, her relationship with her husband was considerably cooler.但是她和她丈夫的关系很冷淡.If you talk to Al Mason at this thing,如果今天早上你跟Al Mason交谈,I want you to casually mention how much I paid for your necklace.我希望你能装着很随意的提起我花了多少钱给你买这条项链.He let me know how much he paid for his wife's new convertible.他上次告诉我他为他妻子的新造型花了多少. Why don't I just pin the receipt to my chest?我干脆在胸前贴一个价目条好了?Look, just work it into the conversation.看,只要在聊天的时候插入就可以了.There's no way I can just work that in, Carlos. 我怎么插得进去嘛,Carlos. Why not? 为什么?At the Donoghue party, everyone was talking mutual funds, Donoghue聚会上,每个人都在谈论那些什么共有基金,and you found a way to mention you slept with half the Yankee outfield.你却说什么你和那些农场里一半以上的美国佬睡过.I'm telling you, it came up in the context of the conversation.我告诉过你了,当时他们在说这些.Hey, people are starting to stare. Can you keep 喂,大家都在看,轻点,好么?your voice down, please?Absolutely. We wouldn't want them to think we're not happy.当然,我可不希望他们认为我们不和.Bree van de Kamp, who lives next door, Bree van de Kamp,住在隔壁,brought baskets of muffins she baked from scratch. 带了两篮她烤的松饼.Bree was known for her cooking, Bree擅长做饭,and for making her own clothes, 会自己做服,and for doing her own gardening, 会园艺,and for reupholstering her own furniture. 甚至会给她的沙发装椅面.Yes, Bree's many talents were known throughout the neighborhood,是的, Bree的很多才能大家都知道,and everyone on Wisteria lane thought of Bree as the perfect wife and mother. 所有住在Wisteria lane的人都认为Bree是个完美的妻子和母亲.Everyone, that is, except her own family.每个人,事实上,除了她的家人. Paul. Zachary.Paul. Zachary. Hello, mrs. Van De Kamp.你好,Van De Kamp太太.Bree, you shouldn't have gone to all this trouble. Bree,不好意思这么麻烦你.It was no trouble at all. 一点也不麻烦.Now, the basket with the red ribbon is filled with desserts for your guests,这个扎红带子的篮子里装了一些甜点,餐后你可以拿给客人们享用,but the one with the blue ribbon is just for you and Zachary.但是这个扎蓝色带子的篮子里装的东西是给你和Zachary.It's got rolls, muffins, breakfast-type things.有松饼,各种各样的可以装在篮子里的吃的.Thank you. 谢谢.Well, the least I could do is 嗯,至少这是我能做的,make sure you boys had a decent meal to look forwardto in the morning. 这样孩子们明天早上至少能吃顿好的.I know you're out of your minds with grief.我知道你已经悲痛欲绝了. Yes, we are.是的.Of course, I will need the baskets back once you're done.当然,吃完东西记得把篮子还给我. Of course. 当然.Susan Mayer, who lives across the street,Susan Mayer,住在街对面, brought macaroni and cheese.带来了通心粉和奶酪.Her husband Carl always teased her about her macaroni,她的丈夫Carl总是笑她做的通心粉,saying it was the only thing she knew how to cook, 说这是她唯一会做的东西,and she rarely made it well.而且她还做不好.It was too salty the night she and Carl moved into their house. 她和Carl搬来那天晚上做的,太咸.It was too watery the night she found lipstick on Carl's shirt.当她发现Carl的衬衫上有唇印的那天晚上做的通心粉又太松软. She burned it the night carl told her he was leaving her for his secretary.carl告诉她要离开她去他的秘书那里的那天晚上,她把通心粉倒了.A year had passed since the divorce. 她已经离婚一年了.Susan had started to think how nice it would be to have a man in her life, Susan开始觉得生活中有个男人是件美好的事情,even one who would make fun of her cooking. 就算是一个只会嘲弄她的厨艺的男人. Mom... why would someone kill themselves? 妈妈... 为什么有人要自杀? Well... sometimes people are so unhappy,嗯...因为他们太不快乐了,they think that's the only way they can solve theirproblems.他们觉得这是他们解决问题的唯一方法.But mrs. Young always seemed happy.但是,Young太太看起来一直很开心啊. Yeah, sometimes people pretend to be one way on the outside when they're tot ally different on the inside.嗯,是的,有时候有些人在外人面前的表现和实际上是完全不一样的.Oh, you mean like how dad's girlfriend always smiling and says nice things,哦,你是说爸爸的女朋友总是表面上看起来很好,but deep down, you just know she's a bitch? 但是实际上,她只是个婊子? I don't like that word, Julie. 我不喜欢这个字眼, Julie. But, yeah, that's a great example. 但是,是的,这个例子棒极了. Hey, what's going on? Sorry I'm late. 嗨,怎么了,抱歉我来迟了. Hi, susan. 嗨, susan.Hey. So, what did Carl say when you confronted him? 嗨,那么,当你反对的时候, Carl 怎么说?You'll love this. He said... 你会喜欢这个的,他说... it doesn't mean anything. It was just sex. 这不代表什么,只是性.Ah, yes, page one of the philanderer's handbook.哦是的,这是那些花花公子手册上第一页所写的.Yeah, and then he got this zen look on his face, and he said, "you know, Susan, 是的,然后他摆出一脸无辜的表情,说, "你知道的, Susan,most men live lives of quiet desperation."大部分男人都在平静的绝望中过着他们的生活."Please tell me you punched him.请告诉我说你踹了他.6序号英文字幕中文字幕No, I said, "really? And what do most women lead 没有,我说, "是么,那么大部分女人 lives of noisy fulfillment?" 每天所过的吵吵闹闹的日子有是什么呢?" Hmm. Good for you.嗯,说得好.I mean, of all people, did he have to bang his secretary? I had that woman over for brunch.我不明白,那么多人,干嘛和他的秘书搞在一起? 大概她的早餐做得比我好.It's like my grandmother always said --an erect penis doesn't have a conscience. 就像我祖母说的 -- 男人勃起的时候毫无道德可言. Even the limp ones aren't that ethical. 就算没勃起的时候也是没什么道德的.This is half the reason I joined the NRA. 这是半个我加入NRA的原因. Well, when Rex started going to those medicalconferences,嗯,当Rex开始参加这些医学会议时, I wanted it in the back of his mind that he had a loving wife at home我希望他记得还有个爱他的妻子在家里等他. with a loaded Smith & Wesson. 还有一群孩子. Lynnie, Tom's always away on business. Do you ever worry he might? Lynnie, Tom总是在外面公干,难道你不担心么?Oh, please, the man's gotten me pregnant three times in four years. 哦,拜托,这个男人让我在4年内怀了3次孕. I wish he was having sex with someone else.我希望他去和别人做爱.So, Susan, is he going to stop seeing that woman? 那么, Susan,他决定不再见那个女人了么?I don't know.我不知道.I'm sorry, you guys. I just... 我很抱歉,我只是...I just don't know how I'm going to survive this. 我只是不知道该如何渡过这一切.Listen to me.听我说.We all have moments of desperation.我们都有过绝望的时候.But if we can face them head-on, that's when we find out just how strong we really are. 但是当我们勇于面对这些并继续前进,我们就会发现自己是多么坚强. Susan. I was just saying Paul wants us to go overon friday.Susan.我刚说Paul让我们周五过去. He needs us to go through Mary Alice's closetand help pack up her things. 他想让我们帮忙收拾Mary Alice的衣橱和其他的东西.He said he can't face doing it by himself.他说他一个人无法面对这一切. Sure. That's fine. 好的,没有问题. Are you okay? 你还好吧? Yeah.当然.I'm just so angry.我只是有点生气.If Mary Alice was having problems,she should havecome to us.如果Mary Alice有什么困难,应该来找我们.She should have let us help her. 她应该找我们帮忙. What kind of problems could she have had?她到底有什么问题?She was healthy, had a great home, a nice family. 她很健康,有个温暖的家.#NAME? #NAME? #NAME?#NAME?No, if Mary Alice was having some sort of crisis, we'd have known. 不, 如果Mary Alice 遇到什么危机,我们应该知道.She lives 50 feet away, for god's sakes.她就住在50英尺外. Gabby, the woman killed herself. Gabby,她自杀了. Something must have been going on. 一定发生了什么.I wouldn't eat that if I were you. 如果我是你,我一定不会吃. Why?为什么?I made it. Trust me. 这是我做的,相信我.Hey, hey, do you -- do you have a death wish? 嗨,嗨,你有什么遗愿么?No, I just refuse to believe that anybody cans crew up macaroni and cheese.不,我只是不相信有人会做不好通心粉和奶酪. Oh, my god.哦,上帝.How did you -- it tastes like it's burned and undercooked.你怎么----感觉像烧焦了,又像没煮熟. Yeah, I get that a lot. Here you go. 嗯,我说过了. Ha ha. Thanks.哈哈,谢谢.I'm Mike Delfino. I just started renting the simms house next door.我是Mike Delfino.我刚开始租SIMM的房子,就在隔壁.Susan Mayer. I live across the street. Susan Mayer. 我住在对街.Oh, yeah, mrs. Huber told me about you.哦,是的,Huber太太跟我提起过你. Said you illustrate children's books. 说你给孩子们的书画插图.Yeah, I'm very big with the under-5 set.是啊,那些给5岁以下孩子们看的. #NAME? #NAME? #NAME?#NAME?So if you ever have a clog... 如果你的水管被堵了... or something.或是其他什么.Now that everybody's seen that I brought something,现在,大家都看到我带来什么了, I should probably just throw this out. 我最好还是扔了它们. Ease up, you little vampire. 放轻松.Lynette, I've been looking all over for you.Lynette,我正到处找你. Are you aware of what your sons are doing?你知道你的儿子们在干嘛么? What are you doing? We are at a wake. 你们在干嘛?我们是来守夜的.When we got here, you said we could go in the pool. 我们来的时候,你说过我们可以在水池里玩的.I said you could go by the pool. 我说你们可以在水池边玩. Do you have your swimsuits on? 你们穿游泳裤了?Yeah, we put them under our clothes before we left. 是的,我们来的时候就穿好了. You three planned this? All right. That's it. Getout! 你们早就计划好了,我明白了,出来!- No! - 不! #NAME?#NAME?I am your mother. You have to do what I say. Come on. 我是你们老妈,要听我的话,快点.We want to swim, and you can't stop us!我们想游泳,你不可以阻止我们! Get out, or I will get in this pool and just grab you. Get out! 出来,否则我就进去抓你们了,出来! Get over here. 过来. Get -- get over here!过来!All right, give me your arm. Get back -- 好,把你的胳膊给我,回去 --Move it! That's right! Get over here! 很好,过来! Paul, we have to leave now. Paul,我们得走了.Once again, I am so sorry for your loss.我很遗憾.Go. 走.Lynette shouldn't have been so concerned about myhusband.Lynette没必要这么在意我的丈夫.He had other things on his mind -- 他脑袋里在想别的事情 --things below the surface.一些被掩盖的事情. The morning after my funeral, 我葬礼的第二天早上, my friends and neighbors quietly went back to their busy, busy lives.我的朋友和邻居们又回到了他们从前忙碌的生活.While some did their cooking... 有些人在做饭... and some did their cleaning... 有的人在打扫... and some did their yoga... 有的做瑜珈... others did their homework. 有人在做家庭作业. Hi.嗨.I'm Julie. I kicked my soccer ball into your backyard.我是Julie.我的球不小心踢进你的后院了.Oh, okay. Well, let's go around and get it. 哦,没关系,我们去拿回来. Stay.待在这儿.His wife died a year ago. 他妻子一年前死了.He wanted to stay in L.A., but there were too manymemories.他想待在 L.A.,但是那有太多的回忆.He's renting for tax purposes, but he hopes to buya place real soon.他租了那里,但是想尽快买个房子.I can't believe you went over there. 真不敢相信你跑去那里了.Hey, I saw you both flirting at the wake.嗨,那天我看见你们在互相调情. You're obviously into each other. 你们互相吸引. Now that you know he's single, you can ask him out. 现在你知道他是单身,就可以约他出来.Julie, I like mr. Delfino, I do. Julie, 我的确喜欢Delfino先生.I just, uh, I don't even know if I'm ready to start dating yet.我只是,我还不知道自己是否准备好要开始约会了.Oh, you need to get back out there. 哦,你需要从这里走出去.Come on. How long has it been since you've had sex? 去吧,你有多久没做爱了?Are you mad that I asked you that? 我问这个会不会让你生气? No, I'm just trying to remember.不,我只是在想.I don't want to talk to you about my love life anymore. It weirds me out. 我不想和你谈我的感情生活,这很奇怪.I wouldn't have said anything. It's just...我不会说什么了,只是...What? 什么? I heard dad's girlfriend ask if you'd dated anyone since the divorce, 我听说老爸的女朋友问你离婚后有没有什么约会,and dad said he doubted it. 老爸说他很怀疑. And then they both laughed. 然后他们都笑了. #NAME? #NAME? #NAME? #NAME?I brought you a little housewarming gift.我带了点小礼物,欢迎你来这里住. I probably should have brought something by earlier, but...我应该早点来的,但是...actually, you're the first in the neighborhood tostop by. 事实上,你是第一个来拜访我的人.Really?真的么?Susan knews he was lucky. Susan知道她很幸运.An eligible bachelor had moved onto wisteria lane, 一个条件不错的单身汉搬来wisteria lane住,and she was the first to find out, 她是第一个发现的人, but she also knew that good news... 但是她也知道好消息...Travels quickly.传得很快.Edie Britt was the most predatory divorc閑 in a5-block radius.Edie Britt是附近最风骚的离婚女人.10序号英文字幕中文字幕Her conquests were numerous...她的群下之臣无数...varied... 各种各样... and legendary. 简直就像小说.Hi, Susan. I hope I'm not interrupting. 嗨, Susan.希望没有打扰到你们.You must be Mike Delfino. Hi, I'm Edie. Britt.你一定就是Mike Delfino.嗨,我是Edie. Britt.I live over there.我住那边.Welcome to Wisteria lane. 欢迎你来Wisteria lane.Susan had met the enemy, and she was a slut.Susan遇到了敌人,而且还是个荡妇. Thank you. Ha ha. What's this?谢谢,哈哈,这是什么?Sausage putanesca. It's just something I threw together. 一些腊肠之类的东西.我把他们混合了一下.Well, thanks, Edie. Ha ha. That's great. 哦,谢谢, Edie.哈哈,很棒.I'd invite you both in, but I was sort of in the middle of something.我应该邀请你们进来,但是屋子很乱. And just like that, the race for Mike Delfino had begun.就这样,对于Mike Delfino的竞争开始了.For a moment, Susan wondered if her rivalry with Edie would remain friendly. 有那么一会儿, Susan 很怀疑她和Edie能否友好竞争.Oh, Mike. I heard you're a plumber? 哦, Mike.听说你是个水管工?But she was reminded that when it came to men... 但是她想起,当男人... do you think you could stop by later tonight andtake a look at my pipes? 今天晚上有没有空帮我看看我家的水管? -Women don't fight fair. #NAME? #NAME? - 当然. Thanks. 谢谢. Bye, Susan. 再见, Susan.You can't order me around like I'm a child.你不要老是把我当成小孩子来命令我. #NAME?#NAME? - No. No, no, no. I'm not going.#NAME?It's business. Tanaka expects everyone to bringtheir wives.这是工作. Tanaka希望每个人都待妻子来.Every time I'm around that man, he tries to grabmy ass.每次在他旁边的时候,他总想摸我的屁股.Ha ha. I made over $200,000 doing business with him last year. 哈哈. 去年,我跟他做了一宗 $200,000的生意.If he wants to grab your ass, you let him.如果她想摸的屁股,那就让她摸吧. Mr. Solis. You scared me.Mr. Solis.你吓到我了.Why is that bush still there? You were supposed to dig it up last week. 这个矮树丛怎么还在这里,上个星期你就应该把他们弄掉了. I didn't have time last week.上个星期我没空.I don't want to hear your excuses. Just take careof it.我不要听你的解释,你只要给我做好就可以了.I really hate the way you talk to me. 我实在很讨厌你跟我说话的态度. And I really hate that I spend $15,000我也很讨厌我花了$15,000on your diamond necklace that you couldn't livewithout,给你买了那条你没有就不能活的钻石项链,but I'm learning to deal with it. 但是我试着搞定了.So can I tell Tanaka we'll be there tomorrow night? 那么我可以告诉Tanaka明晚我们都会去?John. We have bandage stop shelf in the kitchen. John. 厨房的架子上有创口贴.Thanks, mrs. Solis. 谢谢,Solis太太.Fine. I'll go.很好,我走了.But I'm keeping my back pressed against the wallthe entire time.但是我会一整晚都靠在墙上的.See? Now this is what a marriage is all about -- compromise.看到了吧?这就是婚姻---妥协. Is your finger okay?你的手指还好么? Yeah, yeah, it's just a small cut. 哦,是的,只是个小伤口. Let me see.让我看看.Hmm. You know, mrs. Solis,嗯,你知道的,Solis太太,Um, I really like it when we hook up,嗯,当我们交缠的时候会很棒的,but, um, well, you know, I-I got to get my workdone,但是,嗯,我得干活,and I can't afford to lose this job. 我不能失去这份工作. This table is hand-carved. 这张桌子是手工刻的. Carlos had it imported from Italy. Carlos从意大利买回来的. It cost him $23,000.花了他$23,000.You want to do it on the table this time? 你想在这张桌子上做? Absolutely.当然.Why can't we ever have normal soup?我们为什么不能喝普通一点的汤?Danielle, there is nothing abnormal about basilpuree.Danielle,罗勒汤没什么不正常的啊.Just once, couldn't we have a soup that people have heard of? 只要一次就好,难到我们不能喝点大家都知道的汤? Like french onion or navy bean. 就像法国洋葱或者是菜豆. First of all, your father can't eat onions. He's deathly allergic. 首先,你们的父亲不能吃洋葱,他对这个极度过敏.And I won't even dignify your navy bean suggestion. 还有,你那个关于菜豆的建议我是不会考虑的.So... how's the osso buco?那么...炖小牛胫怎么样?12序号英文字幕中文字幕It's okay. 可以. It's okay? 可以?Andrew, I spent three hours cooking this meal. Andrew,我花了3个小时准备晚餐. How do you think it makes me feel when you say "it's okay" in that sullen tone? 你觉得如果我听到有人用那种闷闷的口气跟我说"可以"我是什么感觉?Who asked you to spend three hours on dinner?没人让你花3个小时做晚餐? Excuse me?什么?Tim Harper's mom gets home from work, Tim Harper的妈妈下班后才回家, pops open a can of pork and beans, 开一罐猪肉大豆罐头,and boom, they're eating. Everyone's happy.他们就这么吃. 每个人都吃得很开心. You'd rather I serve pork and beans? 你情愿我给你们做大豆或是猪肉? Apologize now. I am begging. 现在给我道歉.I'm saying, do you always have to serve cuisine? 我是说,你干嘛总要弄这些来显示你的厨艺呢?Can't we ever just have food? 难道我们不能就是吃饭而已? Are you doing drugs? 你磕药了么? What? 什么?Change in behavior is one of the warning signs, 怪异的行为是一种信号, and you have been as fresh as paint for the lastsix months.之前半年都很正常.That certainly would explain why you're always locked in the bathroom. 这个就是你总是把自己关在浴室里的原因么. #NAME? #NAME? #NAME?#NAME?Mom, I'm not the one with the problem here, allright?妈妈,这儿有问题的人不是我,明白么?You're the one always acting like she's running for mayor of Stepford. 你总是搞得好像你要去竞选Stepford市市长一样. Rex.Rex.Seeing that you're the head of this household, Iwould really appreciate you saying something.你是一家之主,你不应该说点什么么.Pass the salt?把盐给我?Three days after my funeral, 葬礼后的3天,Lynette replaced her grief with a much more usefulemotion -- Lynette调试了自己的心情,不再悲痛 --indignation.而是愤怒.Tom, this is my fifth message, and you still haven't called me back.Tom, 这是我的第五通留言了, 你还不给我回话.Well, you must be having a lot of fun on yourbusiness trip. I can only imagine.我相信你在外面一定玩得很开心吧. 我可以想象.Well, guess what -- the kids and I want to have somefun, too,嗯,猜猜看---我和孩子们也要出去玩玩, so unless you call me back by noon, 除非你中午之前给我回电话,we are getting on a plane and joining you.我们正在飞机上,马上就加入你们. Mom! 妈妈!Not now, honey. Mommy's threatening daddy.等等,宝贝,我正在威胁你爸爸. Mom. No, I -- where are your brothers? 妈妈,不, 我----你兄弟呢? #NAME?#NAME?#NAME?#NAME?Lynette Scavo? Lynette Scavo? Crap.废话.Natalie Klein. I don't believe it. Natalie Klein. 真不敢相信. Lynette. How long has it been? Lynette. 我们多久没见了? Years.几年了.Uh, how are you? How's the firm? 呃,你现在怎样? 公司怎样? Good. Everyone misses you.很好,大家都很想念你.Yeah. We all say if you hadn't quit, 是的,我们总说如果你没有辞职, you'd be running the place by now. 现在一定是你管理大家. Yeah, well...是啊,呃...So... how's domestic life? 那么...家居生活如何呢? Don't you just love being a mom?是不是很爱做妈妈的感觉? And there it was --the question that Lynette always dreaded. 这就是 Lynette最害怕的问题. Well, to be honest...呃,老实说...for those who asked it, only one answer was acceptable, 对于这些提问的人,只有一个答案是令人满意的,so Lynette responded as she always did.所以Lynette就像往常一样回答了这个问题. She lied.她撒了个谎.It's the best job I've ever had. 这是我做过的最棒的工作.You know what I don't get? 你知道什么是我没有得到的么? What?什么?Why you married mr. Solis.你为什么会嫁给 Solis先生. Well... he promised to give me everything I've ever wanted. 呃... 他承诺说给我所有想要的东西. And did he?他做到了么?Yes.是啊.Then why aren't you happy? 那么你为什么不开心?Turns out I wanted all the wrong things.看起来我似乎要错了.So do you love him?那么你爱他么? I do. 当然.Well, then, why are we here? Why are we doing this? 那么,我们在这里干嘛? 为什么我们要这么做? Because I don't want to wake up one morning 因为我不想某天早上醒来的时候with a sudden urge to blow my brains out.会突然想要捶打自己的头. Hey, can I have a drag? 我能要一根么? Absolutely not. 当然不.You are much too young to smoke.你太年轻了,不适合抽烟. Ah. How would you feel about me using your child-support payments 我用给你留的钱来做整形手术 for plastic surgery?你会怎么想?Stop being so nervous. You're just asking him out to dinner. It's no big deal. 别这么紧张. 你不过请他吃晚餐. 这不是什么大事.You're right.说得对.So is that your project for school?这是你学校的作业?You know, when I was in fifth grade, I made the white house out of sugar cubes. 你知道的,我5年纪的时候,用方糖做了一个白房子.Stop stalling and go 别拖拖拉拉的,走吧before mike figures out he can do better. 在mike发现他能找到更好的之前. Tell me again why I fought for custody of you.再说一次我为什么要这么做. You were using me to hurt dad. 打击爸爸. Oh, that's right. 没错. Oh, god. 哦.上帝.0 0 #NAME? #NAME? #NAME?#NAME? - No, not at all. What's up? #NAME?Well, I -- I just, uh, was wondering if, um... 呃,我 -- 我只是,想知道,呃...if there was any chance that you, uh...有没有机会你, 呃... I-I just wanted to ask if... 我-我只想问问你是否... #NAME? #NAME? #NAME?What are you -- 你怎么 --I was making ambrosia, and I made too much, 我做些可口的食物,做了很多, so I thought I'd bring some over to mike.所以拿点过来给 mike.What's going on? 怎么了?Uh, Susan was just going to ask me something. 呃, Susan 说有点事情要问我. I have a clog. 我的水管堵了. 0- 什么? - And you're a plumber, right? #NAME? Yeah.是啊.The clog's in the pipe.我家的水管堵了. Yeah, that's usually where they are. 是啊,总是这样. Well, I've got one. 呃,没错.Oh, okay. Well, uh let me get my tools.等等,我拿点工具. Now? You want to come over now? 现在?你现在过来么? You have company.你有客人. I don't mind.我不介意. Yeah, just give me two minutes.等我两分钟.。

绝望地主妇第一季中英文台词对照第一集(Season 1, Episode 1)场景：主角颖儿和她的家人坐在客厅里，看电视。

颖儿：嗨，大家好！我是颖儿。

欢迎来到《绝望地主妇》。

费德勒：颖儿，你在看啥？Ying'er, what are you watching?颖儿：我正在看这个超级有趣的美剧。

里面的妇女们生活在一个美丽而又疯狂的社区里。

费德勒：听起来有意思。

可以借我看吗？Sounds interesting. Can I borrow it?颖儿：当然可以！但我保证你会上瘾的。

Of course! But I guarantee you'll get addicted.（几个小时后，费德勒一直盯着电视屏幕）费德勒：这个剧真的太好笑了！我下次会继续看的。

场景：颖儿和她的邻居在社区的咖啡厅见面。

颖儿：嘿，安妮！最近怎么样？Hey, Anne! How have you been?安妮：哎呀，我最近有点闷。

孩子们总是让我手忙脚乱。

颖儿：我明白。

生活中总有一些烦恼。

你有没有想过要做些什么让自己开心的事情？I understand. There are always some worries in life. Have you thought about doing something that makes you happy?安妮：没错。

我一直想学做糕点，但从来没有开始过。

True. I've always wanted to learn how to bake, but I never started.颖儿：那就现在开始吧！我可以帮你找一些食谱。

Then start now! I can help you find some recipes.场景：颖儿和她的丈夫人在餐厅用餐。

颖儿：亲爱的，我想打工。

我们需要更多的经济支持。

Honey, I want to get a job. We need more financial support.丈夫：但你应该是家庭主妇啊。

Gabriella who lives down the block brought a spicy paella. Since her modeling days in New York, Gabriella had developed a taste for rich food, and rich man. Carlos, who worked in mergers and acquisitions, proposed on their third date. Gabriella was touched when tears welled up in his eyes. But she soon discovered this happened every time Carlos closed a big deal. Gabriella liked her paella piping hot. However her relationship with her husband was considerably cooler.If you talk to AL MASON at this thing, I want you to casually mention how much I paid for your necklace. Why not pin the receipt to my chest? He let me know how much he paid for his wife’s convertible. Look, just work it into the conversation. There is no way I can just work that in, Carlos. Why not? At the Donahue party, everyone was talking mutual fund. You found a way to mentioned you slept with half the Yankee outfield. I’m telling you, it came up in the context of the conversation. Hey, people are starting to stare. Can you keep your voice down, please? Absolutely, we wouldn’t want them to think we are not happy.Bree Van who lives next door, brought baskets of muffins she baked from scratch. Bree was known for her cooking, and for making her own clothes, and for doing her gardening, and for re-upholstering her own furniture. Yes, Bree’s many talents were known throughout the neighborhood. Everyone on Wisteria Lane thought of Bree as the perfect wife and mother. Everyone, that is, except her own family.Paul, Zachary. Hello, Mrs. Van. Bree, you shouldn’t have gone to all this trouble. It was no trouble at all. Now the basket with red ribbon is filled with desserts for your guests, but the one with the blue ribbon is just for you and Zachary. It’s got rolls, muffins, breakfast type things. Thanks you. Well, the least thing I could do is make sure you boys had a decent meal to look forward to in the morning. I know you are out of your minds with grief. Yes, we are. Of course, I will need baskets back once you’re done. Of course.Susan, who lived across the street, brought macaroni and cheese. Her husband, Karl, always teased her about her macaroni, saying it was the only thing she knew how to cook and she rarely made it well. It was too salt the night she and Karl moved into their house. It was too watery the night she found lipstick on Karl’s shirt. She burned it the night Karl told her he was leaving her for his secretary. A year had passed since the divorce. Susan had started to think how nice it would be to have a man in her life. Even one who would make fun of her cooking.Mum, why would someone kill themselves? Well, sometimes people are so unhappy, they think that’s the only way to solve their problems. Mrs. Yang always seemed happy. Yeah. Sometimes people pretend to be one way, when they’re totally different on the inside. Oh, you mean like how dad’s girlfriend always smiling and says nice things but we know she’s a bitch. I don’t like that word, Julie. But, yeah, that’s a great example.Sorry, I’m late. Hi Susan. Hey. So, what did Karl say when you confronted him? You’ll love this. He said… it doesn’t mean anything, it was just sex. Ah, yea, page one of the philanderer’s handbook. Yeah, and then he got this zen look on his face, and he said, you know Susan, most men live lives of quiet desperation. Please tell me you punched him. No. I said, “really? And what do most women lead lives of noisy fulfillment? Hmm, good for you. I mean, of all people, did he have to bang his secretary? I had that woman over for brunch. It’s like my grandmother always said, an erect penis doesn’t have a conscience. Even the limp ones aren’t that ethical. This is half the reason I joined the NRA. Well, when Rex started going to those medical conferences, I wanted it in the back of his mind that he had a loving life at home, with a loaded Smith& Wesson. Lynnie, Tom’s always away on business. Do you ever worry he might? Oh, please, the man’s gotten mepregnant three times in four years. I wish he was having sex with someone else. So, Susan, is he gonna stop seeing that woman? I don’t know. I’m sorry, you guys, I just…I just don’t know how I’m gonna survive this. listen to me, we all have moments of desperation. If we have face them head-on, that’s when we’d find out how strong we really are.Susan, Susan. I was just saying Paul wants us to go over on Friday. He needs us to go to Mary Alice’s closet and help pack up her things. He says he can’t face doing it by himself. Sure, that’s fine. Are you OK? Yeah, I’m just so angry. If Mary Alice was having problems, she should have come to us. She should’ve let us help her. What problems could she have had? She was healthy, had a great home and a nice family. Her life was… our life. No. if Mary Alice was having a crisis, we’d have known. She lives 50 feet away, for god sake. Gabby, the woman killed herself. Something must’ve been going on.I wouldn’t eat that if I were you. Why? I made it, trust me. Hey, hey, do you have a death wish? No, I just refused to believe that anybody can screw up macaroni and cheese. Oh, my god. How did you… it tastes like it’s burned and overcooked. Yeah, I get that a lot. Here you go. Thanks, I’m Mark Delfino. I just started renting the Sim’s house next door. Susan Mayer, I live across the street. Mrs. Huber told me about you, said you illustrate children’s books. Yeah, I’m very big with the under-five set. What do you do? Plumber, so if you ever have a clog… or something… now that everybody’s seen that I brought something, I should probably just throw this out.Ease up, you little vampire. Lynette, I have been looking all over for you. Are you aware of what your sons are doing? Cannonball! Stop! What are you doing? We are at a wake. Oh my god. You said we could go in the pool. I said you could go by the pool. Do you have your swimsuits on? Yeah, we put’em on ourselves before we left. You three planned this? all right. that’s it. get out. No. no? I am your mother. You have to do what I say. Come on. We want to swim and you can’t stop us. Here. No. get out. Think I won’t get in this pool and just grab you? Get out! Get over here. All right, give me your arm. You… that’s right, get over here. Go, go, go, go, go. Move it. out, get out. Paul, we have to leave now. once again, I’m so sorry for your loss. Go.Lynette shouldn’t have been so concerned about my husband. He had other things on his mind. Things below the surface. The morning after my funeral, my friends and neighbors quietly went back to their busy, busy lives. While some did their cooking, and some did their cleaning, and some did their yoga, others, did their ‘homework’.Hi, I’m Julie, I kicked my soccer ball into your backyard. Oh, OK, well, let’s go round and get it. stay. His wife died a year ago, he wanted to stay in LA, but here were too many memories. He’s renting for tax purposes, but hopes to buy a place soon. I can’t believe you went over there. Hey, I saw you both flirting at the wake. You are obviously into each other. Now you know he’s single, you can ask him out. Julie, I like Mr. Delfino, I do. I just… I don’t know if I’m ready to start dating yet. You need to get back out there. Come on, how long has it been since you’ve had sex? Are you mad that I asked you that? No, I’m trying to remember. I don’t want to talk to you about my love life anymore. It warns me out. I wouldn’t have said anything. It’s just… what. I heard dad’s girlfriend ask if you’d dated anyone since the divorce. And dad said he doubted it. and then they both laughed. Hey, Susan. Hi, Mike, I brought you a little house-warming gift. I should’ve brought something by earlier, but… actually, you’re the first to stop by. Really?Susan knew she was lucky. An eligible bachelor had moved on to Wisteria Lane. Welcome. And she was the first to find out. But she also knew that good news… hello there. Travels quickly. Edie Bree was the most predatory divorce in a five-block radius. Her conquests were numerous.Varied. And legendary.Hi Susan, I hope I’m not interrupting. You must be Mike Delfino. Hi, I’m Edie, Britt. I live over there. Welcome to Wisteria Lane.Susan had met the enemy, and she was a slut.Thank you. What’s this? sausage puttanesca. It’s just something I threw together. Well, thanks, Edie. That’s, great. I’d invite you both in. but I was sort of in the middle of something. I’m late for an appointment. I just wanted to say hi.And just like that, the race for Mike Delfino had begun. For a moment, Susan wondered if her rivalry with Edie would remain friendly.Oh, Mike, I heard you’re a plumber.But she was reminded that when it came to men…Do you think you could stop by later and take a look at my pipes?Women don’t fight fare.Sure. Thanks. bye, Susan. You can’t order me around like I am a child. Gabbi. No, no, I’m not going. It’s business. Tanaka expects everyone to bring their wives. Every I’m around that man, he tries to grab my ass. I made over 200,000 doing business with him last year. If he wants to grab your ass, you let him. John. Mr. Solis, you scared me. Why is that bush there? You were supposed to dip it up last week. I didn’t have time. I don’t want to hear your excuses. Just take care of it. I really hate the way you talk to me. And I hate that I spent 15,000 on your diamond necklace which you couldn’t live without. But I’m learning to do with it. so can I tell Tanaka we’ll be there tomorrow? John, we have bandages top shelf in the kitchen. Thanks, Mrs. Solis. Fine, I’ll go. But I’m keeping my back pressed against the wall the entire time.You know what I don’t get? What? Why you married Mr. Solis. Well, he promised to give me everything I’ve ever wanted. And did he? Yes. Then why you aren’t happy? Turns out I wanted all the wrong things. So do you love him? I do. Well, then, why are we here, why are we doing this. because I don’t want to wake up one morning with a sudden urges to blow my brains out. Hey, can I have a drag? Absolutely not. You are much too young to smoke. How would you feel about me using your child-support payments for plastic surgery? Stop being so nervous, you’re just asking him to dinner. No big deal. You are right. so is that your project for school? You know when I was in fifth grade, I made the White House out of sugar cubes. Stop stalling and go. Before Mike figures out he can do better. Tell me again why I fought for custody of you. You were using me hurt dad. Oh, that’s right. oh, god. Hi. Hey, Susan. Are you busy? Not, not at all, what’s up? Well, I… I just, uh, was wondering if there was any chance that you, uh…I just wanted to ask if…Edie. Hey, there, Susan. What are you…I was making ambrosia. And I made too much so I thought I’d bring some over to Mike. What’s going on? Susan was just going to ask me something. I have a clog. Excuse me? And you’re a plumber, right? yeah. The clog’s in the pipe. Yeah, that’s usually where they are. Well, I’ve got one. OK, let me get my tools. Now? you want to come over now? you have company. I don’t mind. Just give me 2 minutes, I’ll be right over. Just stuff the hair down here. I stuffed it. it’s not enough to clog it. here. OK, look. Put in this peanut butter. And this cooking oil. Mom. And these olives. Mom, I’m telling you, it’s not working. Oh, god, that’s him. How am I going to stop up the sink. Well, here’s your problem. Looks like somebody stuffed a bunch of popsicles sticks down here.。

第一集PILOT的引子部分非VoiceoverMy name is Mary Alice Young. When you read this morning's paper, you may com e across an article about the unusual day I had last week. Norm ally, there's never anything newsworthy有报道价值的about m y life. That all changed last Thursday. Of course everything seem ed as normal at first. I m ade m y breakfast for my family. I performed m y chores家务杂事. I com pleted m y projects. I ran m y errands任务. In truth, I spent the day as I spend every other day - quietly polishing the routine例行公事，平凡的of my life until it gleamed闪烁，瞬息的一现with perfection. That's why it was so astonishing惊讶的when I decided to go to m y hallway closet 壁橱to retrieve重新得到a revolver左轮手枪that had never been used.My body was discovered by m y neighbour, Mrs. Martha Huber, who had bee n startled吃惊by a strange popping平的一声sound. Her curiosity aroused, Mrs. Huber tried to think of a reason for dropping in on me unannounced未经宣布的. After som e initial 最初的hesitation犹豫, she decided to return the blender搅拌器she had borrowed from me 6 m onths before. And for a m oment, Mrs. Huber stood m otionless不动的in her kitchen, grief-stricken by this senseless tragedy悲剧. But, only for a moment. If there was one thing Mrs. Huber was known for, it was her ability to look on the bright side.I was laid to rest on a Monday. After the funeral葬礼, all the residents of Wisteria Lane cam e to pay their respects. And as people do in this situation, they brought food.Lynette Scavo brought fried chicken. Lynette had a great family recipe 食谱for fried chicken. Of course, she didn't cook m uch as she was m oving up the corporate ladder. She didn't have the tim e. But when her doctor announced Lynette was pregnant, her husband Tom had an idea. Why not quit your job? Kids do much better with stay at hom e mums; it was so m uch less stressful压力大的. But this was not the case事实不是这样. In fact, Lynette's life had becom e so hectic发热的she was now forced to get her chicken from a fast food restaurant. Lynette would have appreciated the irony of it if she stopped to think about it, but she couldn't. She didn't have the tim e.Gabrielle Solis, who lives down the block, brought a spicy paella. Since her modelling days in New York, Gabrielle had developed a taste for rich food and rich m en. Carlos, who worked in mergers合并and acquisitions 获得, proposed 求婚on their third date. Gabrielle was touched when tears welled up in his eyes. But she soon discovered this happened every tim e Carlos closed a big deal. Gabrielle liked her paella piping hot. However, her relationship with her husband was considerably cooler.Bree Van De Kamp, who lives next door, brought baskets of m uffins she baked from scratch. Bree was known for her cooking. And for m aking her own clothes. And for doing her own gardening. And for reupholstering重新装璜her own furniture家具. Yes, Bree's m any talents were known throughout the neighbourhood. And everyone on Wisteria Lane thought of Bree as the perfect wife and mother. Everyone, that is, except her own family.Susan Meyer, who lives across the street, brought m acaroni通心面and cheese. Her husband Carl always teased her about her m acaroni, saying it was the only thing she knew how to cook, and she rarely made it well. It was too salty the night she and Carl moved into their new house. It was too watery the night she found lipstick on Carl's shirt. She burned it the night Carl told her he was leaving her for his secretary.A year had passed since the divorce. Susan was starting to think how nice it would be to have a m an in her life, even one who would m ake fun of her cooking.Lynette shouldn't have been so concerned about m y husband. He had other things on his mind. Things below the surface.The m orning after m y funeral, m y friends and neighbours quietly went back to their busy, busy lives. Som e did their cooking. And som e did their cleaning. And some did their yoga. Others did their homework.Susan knew she was lucky. An eligible合格的bachelor单身男子had moved onto Wisteria Lane, and she was the first to find out. But she also knew that good news travels quickly. Edie Britt was the m ost predatory掠夺的divorcee in a 5 block radius半径. Her conquests were numerous很多的.Varied? And legendary. Susan had m et the enem y, and she was a slut泼妇.And just like that, the race for Mike Delfino had begun. For a m oment, Susan wondered if her rivalry敌对抗with Edie would remain friendly. But she was rem inded that when it cam e to m en? Women don't fight fair.Three days after m y funeral, Lynette replaced her grief with a m uch m ore useful emotion – indignation愤怒.To those who asked it, only one answer was acceptable. So, Lynette responded as she always did - she lied.The sound that awakened m y son was som ething he'd heard only once before, m any years ago, when he was quite young. But he recognized it instantly. It was the sound of family secret.Seven days after m y funeral, life on Wisteria Lane finally returned to norm al. Which, for som e of my friends, was unfortunate.BREE sobbed 哭泣quietly in the bathroom for 5 minutes. But her husband never knew. Because when Bree finally emerged浮现, she was perfect.And just like that, the possibility that Susan had clung onto, the m aybe of Mike Delfino was gone forever. And despite 尽管the precariousness 不安全不稳定of the situation, Susan took a m oment to m ourn哀痛her loss.It didn't take long for Susan to realize, this was just not her night.And just like that, Susan was happy. Life was suddenly full of possibilities. Not to m ention a few unexpe cted surprises.The next day, m y friends cam e together to pack away m y clothes, m y personal belongings, and what was left of m y life. Not quite, Gabrielle, not quite. I'm so sorry, girls. I never wanted you to be burdened负担with this. 第二集An odd thing happens when we die. Our senses感觉vanish. Taste, touch, sm ell and sound becom e a distant memory. But our sight, ah, our sight expands. And we can suddenly see the world we've left behind so clearly. Of course, m ost of what's visible to the dead can also be seen by the living, if they only take the tim e to look. Like m y friend Gabrielle. I should've seen how unhappy she was. But I didn't. I only saw her clothes from Paris; And her platinum白金jewellery; And her brand new diamond watch. Had I looked closer, I've seen that Gabrielle was a drowning淹没的woman, desperately in search of a life raft橡皮艇. Luckily for her, she found one. Of course, Gabrielle only saw her young gardener as a way to infuse注入her life with a little excitem ent. But now, she was about to discover just how exciting her life could get.Gabrielle was panicked. She knew if her husband discovered her secret, she would feel the full force of his wrath 愤怒.The peaceful facade正面表面外观of Wisteria Lane had recently been shattered心烦意乱的. First by my suicide, and then by the discovery of a note am ong my belongings that suggested a suspicious可疑的reason for my desperate act. My friends gathered to discuss its im plications含义.My friends were right to be concerned. They knew that every family has it s secrets. And as my son and husband could've told them, you need to think carefully before digging them up.After talking for hours, m y friends still hadn't agreed on what to do with the note. So, they decided to talk about it in the m orning after a good night's rest. But no one could fall asleep that night. They each kept thinking of m y suicide, and how terribly alone I must've felt. You see, loneliness was som ething my friend's understood all too well.Susan awoke that night alone and parched焦躁的. A nd as she gazed out her window, she saw the tall drink of water she needed to quench压制her thirst.Julie was glad Susan was rekindling再振作her love life. Of course, she was unaware of her m other's recent track record with fire.Doctor Albert Goldfine was the m ost accom plished marriage counsellor顾问in the city. He had dealt with problems ranging from substance abuse, to infidelity无信仰, to dom estic violence家庭暴力. Yes, Dr. Goldfine thought he had seen it all. And then, he m et the Van De Kamp's.Though he's been a policem an for 6 years, Officer Hayes had never found himself in a truly dangerous situation. Then again, he had never before told a wom an how to raise her children.For John, this was no longer a meaningless无意义的l ittle affair. Gabrielle could now clearly see he was falling in love with her.Susan suddenly had an awful可怕的feeling in the pit of her stom ach. As if she was watching an accident in slow m otion. She knew it would happen, but was powerless 无力的to stop it.As I watched Susan, I couldn't help feeling sorry for her. She wanted so m uch to know why I did it. Why I killed myself. It's not enough to want the truth. You m ust know where to look for it. And the truth is elusive难懂的，难捉摸的, because it knows where to hide.For the first tim e, Lynette could see this was not the innocent play of children. She was being challenged. So she decided it was tim e to get creative.Gabrielle could see what this gesture had cost Carlos, so she responded the only way she knew how.She had a feeling the truth would've been lost on her husband anyway. After all, it's the rare m an who understands the value of a single, perfect rose.Round one第一回合had started. It was everything Susan could do to keep a smile on her face. Round two was under way, and she was already taking a beating.What Edie hadn't c ounted on was Susan had som eone else in her corner.Susan was furious狂怒的at Edie for using a dog to ingratiate 讨好herself with its owner. She was also furious with Mike for not seeing through this blatant喧闹的manoeuvre演习. But m ostly, she was furious at herself for not having thought of it first.And just like that, Susan could suddenly see som et hing she's never seen before. Mike Delfino was still in love with his late wife. And she knew right then, that neither she nor Edie would be laying claim to his heart anytim e soon. So, she decided, for now, she could settle for just being his friend.Yes, as I look back at the world I left behind, it's all so clear to m e. The beauty that waits to be unveiled显露, the m ysteries that long to be uncovered. But, people so rarely stop to take a look. They just keep m oving. It's a sham e, really. There's so much to see.第三集Susan took dating tips from her 12 year old daughter. Bree accidentally poisoned her husband. Lynette indulged沉溺于in creative parenting. While Gabrielle indulged in the company of her gardener. And everybody's wondering-Why their best friend just killed herself. Everyone has a little dirty laundry.After I died, I began to surrender交出投向the parts of m yself that were no longer necessary. My desires, beliefs, am bitions, doubts, every trace痕迹of m y humanity人性was discarded抛弃. I discovered when m oving through eternity, it helps to travel lightly. In fact, I held on to only one thing - m y memory. It's astonishing to look back on the world I left behind. I remember it all, every single detail. Like m y friend, Bree Van De Kamp. I remember the easy confidence of her smile,the gentle elegance优雅of her hands,the refined精确的优雅的warm t h of her voice.But what I rem ember m ost about Bree-was the look of fear in her eyes.Bree had started to realize her world was unravelling阐明解释，散开, and for a wom an who despised轻视loose ends, that was unacceptable.Yes Bree was afraid of m any things,but there was one thing she wasn’t afraid of-It was challenge.The day on Wisteria Lane began like any other, with a cup of coffee and the m orning paper. And while Lynette read the business section- And Gabrielle studied the fall collections-And Bree searched for decorating ideas.Susan scanned the front page and saw som ething that caught her eye.Gabrielle spent her morning searching for the m ysterious little girl. Sadly for her, the m ystery was solved a bit too quickly.And the next day, Gabrielle calm ed her own nerves by giving som ething to her new best friend.After her talk with Lynette, Susan decided to take a look at her old photo album. And she began to see herself in a whole new light. And the picture wasn't flattering讨人喜欢的.Susan was proud of herself. She was finally ready to let go of her anger. Well, almost.It was in that mom ent that Gabrielle realized this ride was far from over.On Wisteria Lane, an unsettled Susan racked her brain to find a way into her own house.Lying naked in her shrubs矮树, it occurred to Susan that this could be the m ost humiliating丢脸moment of her life.Bree searched for Rex's audio tape, hoping to find answers. She found answers, all right. But to an entirely different question.Yes, I rem ember the world. Every detail. And what I rem ember most is how afraid I was. What a waste. You see, to live in fear is not to live at all. I wish I could tell this to those I left behind, but would it do any good? Probably not. I understand now there will always be those who face their fears, and there will always be those who run away.第四集Susan played with fire-And could get burned .Gabrielle found herself a playmate.Whilst同时Lynette couldn't get her kids to stop playing. And Bree played hardball. Everyone has a little dirty laundry.When I was alive I maintained many different identit ies.Lover, wife and ultimately终极的最终victim. Yes, labels are important to the living, they dictate命令支配how people see them selves, like my friend Lynette. She used to see herself as a career woman, and a hugely巨大的successful one at that. She was known for her power lunches. Her eye catching 迷人的presentations. And her ruthlessness无情冷酷at wiping 消除out the competition. But Lynette gave up all that to assum e a new label. The incredibly难以置信的satisfying role of full time mother. But unfortunately for Lynette this new label frequently fell short of what was advertised.It suddenly occurred to Lynette that her label was about to change again. And that for the next few years she would be known as the m other of the boys who painted Tiffany Astelrod blue.It looked to be an interesting afternoon on wisteria lane. A mysterious cassette tape had been discovered by my friend Bree. She had stolen it from her m arriage counsellor顾问, a counsellor I had once spoken to in strictest confidence.I had the night m are again.Yes. But this tim e I was standing in a river and I saw the girl under the water and she kept scream ing "Angela"over and over again.Actually,that’s m y real name.Gabrielle knew her vacation from the world had ended. What she didn't know was that John had left behind a souvenir.纪念品In that m oment, Lynette m ade a decision. When it cam e to dealing with her children--m edication was no longer an option. Of course, given her continuing bundle of frustration挫折, Lynette also felt that a little "self medication"couldn't hurt.What type of person would send such a note? Was it an enem y? Of course. But what kind? An acquaintance?A stranger?Or how about a neighbour that lives a few feet away?第五集Ultimatums基本原理，最后通牒were m ade-Questions were asked- And lots of evidence was uncovered Every neighbourhood has a wom an like Alberta Fom e. And every wom an like Mrs Fom e has a cat. When she travelled, Mrs Fome would arrange for friends to look after her beloved 喜爱的pet. This tim e, she was forced to ask her neighbour Susan Mayer. Mrs Fom e liked Susan. But it was common knowledge on Wisteria Lane that wherever Susan Mayer went, bad luck was sure to follow. Her m isfortunes不幸ranged from the common place- -To the unusual- -To the truly bizarre奇异的.As she waved goodbye, she worried that Susan's streak of bad luck would continue. For that m atter, so did her cat. Though she didn't know it at the tim e Susan's luck-..had finally started to change.News that an intruder入侵者had breached破坏侵害the security安全of Wisteria Lane spread like wildfire. At a neighbourhood watch m eeting the next night, residents居民voiced their concerns over the increasing增加dangers their community faced.Mrs Eida Greenberg announced that som eone was looking through her bathroom window whenever she took a shower.Bob Fisk warned those present that an unnam ed government agency was listening in to their phone conversations. Helen veil spoke of a ruthless local teenage gang that had egged her mini van货车.The evening concluded with Officer Thompson offering safety tips and a plan of action.The next day as residents began to patrol 巡逻Wisteria Lane in the hope of foiling击退potential burglars窃贼, Gabrielle was about to experience a hom e invasion侵犯of her own.Whilst the residents of Wisteria Lane kept up their patrols巡逻in an effort to prevent future break-ins, Lynette hatched策划a plan to break her children into Barcliff Academ y.People by their very nature are always on the lookout for intruders入侵者.Trying to prevent those on the outside getting in. But there will always be those who force their way into our lives.Just as there will be those that we invite in.But the most troubling of all will be the ones that stand on the outside looking in. The one s we never truly get to know.第六集Secrets were revealed.Relationships got complicated.And the m ystery...deepened.Suburbia郊区，郊区居民is a battleground, an arena舞台for all forms of dom estic com bat. Husbands clash 冲突with wives, parents cross swords武力，战争with children, but the bloodiest血腥的battles often involve wom en and their m others-in-law.The war for control of Carlos began the night he proposed计划, and Gabrielle had been losing ground to Juanita ever since. From the prenuptial agreement which she reluctantly不情愿的signed, to the selection of wedding music she despised轻视, the color of the house paint she hadn't wanted ... Gabrielle had suffered one defeat after another. And now that Juanita suspected her daughter-in-law of having an affair, it had becam e increasingly apparent that in this war......no prisoners would be taken.Sadly for Juanita, she had ignored the first rule of war...never underestimate低估your enemy!Of the m any suburban郊外的rituals仪式，典礼, none is quite so cherished as the neighborhood yard sale. The shoppers顾客com e to sift through the discarded belongings of someone they don't really know, in hopes of finding bargains they don't really need, each so determined to save a few pennies, they often miss hiddentreasures...She was convinced he was deliberately故意的谨慎的从容的hiding Zach, and hiding the truth. She hoped that finding one would lead to the other. To succeed, Susan would have to be evasive逃避的托辞的herself.Juanita m ight have been the gambler of the family.But Gabrielle was the one who knew how to bluff虚张声势，吓唬.That night, while m ost of Wisteria Lane dreamt the night away, Lynette was in the middle of her own personal night m are. Determined her boys would not miss their fairy tale仙女故事debut, Lynette stayed up 18 hours staright, sewing. But she began to fear her story would not have a happy ending.Luckily for Lynette, she had a magic potion handy.And once she had taken it...the m agic kept working.......and working......and working.It wasn't until noon that lynette finally took a break. And the reality of what she had done began to sink in.Juanita was now m ore convinced than ever that her treacherous背叛的e daughter-in-law was having an affair. But the question rem ained, with whom?And suddenly, Juanita remembered it wasn't the m en Gabrielle talked to that she had to worry about.The search for power begins when we're quite young. As children, we're taught that the power of good triumphs胜利over the power of evil.But as we get older, we realize that nothing is ever that simple. Traces of evil always remain...第七集Som e secrets were uncovered...And som e secrets......were shared.Competition竞争. It m eans different things to different people. In Suburbia, it m eans keeping up with the Jones's. On Wisteria Lane, that m eans keeping up with Bree Van de Kamp. Everyone knew Bree had the nicest lawn草坪in the neighborhood. And no one begrudged her this. No one, that is, except Martha Huber, whose own lawn paled in com parison. No matter how carefully she trimmed修剪... ...or how lovingly she watered... ...or how generously she fertilized施肥... ...the grass was always greener on the other side of the fence围墙.Ye s. Mrs. Huber understood the first rule of competition. In order to win, you have to want it m ore...When I was alive, m y friends and I cam e together once a m onth for a m eeting of the Wisteria Lane Book Club. We found the problems of literary characters so absorbing...the way they dealt with adversity不幸，厄运......conducted illicit非法的，不正当的affairs......endured domestic dramas......and planned romantic conquests.But since m y death, m y friends had lost their interest in fiction. Their own problems had becom e absorbing enough.Luckily for Tom, Lynette ha d a recipe for success…unfortunately for her, she was m issing the secret ingredient 成分.Paul had always known Edie Brit was capable of doing anything to close a deal.But now he realized she was capable of so much m ore.As Lynette swallowed the stolen m edication of an eight-year-old child, she vowed she'd never again sink to such depths...... any tim e soon.While Lynette was commanding everyone's attention......Susan was trying to rem ain inconspicuous.不显眼的As Juanita hovered dangerously close to the white light, Lynette and Tom were heading into a black void空间.Com petition, it m eans different things to different people. But whether it's a friendly rivalry......or a fight to the death,the end result is the sam e. There will be winners -and there will be losers.Of course, the trick诡计is to know which battles to fight. You see, no victory com es without a price.第八集Som e neighbors hired help.And som e helped them selves.Some just couldn't stop.And one didn't stop in tim e.There is a widely read book that tells us everyone is a sinner罪人. Of course, not everyone who reads this book feels guilt over the bad things that they do.But Bree Van de Kamp did. In fact, Bree had spent m ost of her life, feeling guilty.As a child, she felt guilty about not getting straight "A"s...As a teenager, she felt guilty about letting her boyfriend go to second base...As a newlywed新婚的人, she felt guilty about taking three weeks to get out her thank-you cards...she knew the transgressions违法，罪过of her past were nothing com pared with the sin过失she was about to commit.Bree knew what she was about to do was wrong, but like m ost sinners罪人, she would worry about her guilt tom orrow.Not since m y own suicide had violence intruded闯入upon the serenity 晴朗of life on Wisteria Lane in such a conspicuous显著的，出众的fashion. And needless to say, m y friends attacked the problem head on.Lynettebrought the broom扫帚. Susan brought the trash垃圾bags. And Bree brought the industrial strength solvent溶剂.Like every city, Fairview had a neighborhood that was less than desirable. It was an accepted fact: anyone who lingered逗留there after midnight was usually up to no good. Rex and Bree Van de Kamp were no exception 例外.A weary疲倦的Lynette drank her potent有效的tea in hopes of finally finding the sleep that had eluded逃避her. Unfortunately for Lynette, there would be no rest for the weary.While Susan was hopelessly stuck, Gabrielle was moving to confront the issue of her young lover's restless conscience.Although she would need to be discrete离散的.There is a widely read book that tells us everyone is a sinner. Of course, not everyone feels guilt over the bad things they do.In contrast对比, there are those who assum e more than their share of the blam e.There are others, who sooth真实的温柔的抚慰的their consciences良心with sm all acts of kindness.Or by telling themselves their sins were justified情有可原的e.Finally, there are the ones who simply vow to do better next tim e, and pray for forgiveness.Sometimes, their prayers are answered.第九集One said goodbye...One almost lost it...And one got exactly确实的what she deserved.Gabrielle was waiting for her next great idea. Her first great idea cam e when she was fifteen, after her stepfather继父paid her a late-night visit. She bought a bus ticket to New York the very next day. Her ne xt occurred five years later when she decided to seduce 诱惑a fam ous fashion photographer. One week later, she began her career as a runway m odel, which soon led to her next great idea--her decision to m arry Carlos Solis.Before she knew it, she had jumped off the runway and m oved to the suburbs郊区. Her most recent great idea was born out of her boredo m无聊with her new life. That's how she cam e to start an affair with her teenage gardener, which was cut short by a tragic悲惨的accident. So once again, Gabrielle was in need of a great idea.It was then that Gabrielle got her next great idea.She decided to throw the first annual Sacred宗教的Heart Charity Fashion Show, to raise m oney for m ore nursing staff.And that night, when she went to bed, Gabrielle slept like a baby.News of the fashion show spread quickly on Wisteria Lane. Though the event was for charity, Gabrielle soon discovered that when it cam e to the latest fashions, wom en are seldom charitable慈悲的. No one knew this better than Edie Britt. She understood that treachery背叛never goes out of style.Sadly for Mrs. Huber, this was no longer the case.Since the accident, Bree had started to worry that her son's sense of morality道德was going up in smoke.Bree had given Lynette the low down on Valley View Park. It was a gathering place for upscale nannies and their young charges. It was Lynette's first tim e there, and she was determined not to go hom e alone.Of course, Lynette had high standards, so making a connection......wasn't easy. Still, she was desperate to find that special som eone...And that's exactly who she found.From the moment she saw her......Lynette knew she had to have her.Bree had resorted求助，经常去to extrem e measures to save her son's soul. As she rummaged搜查t hrough Andrew's private possessions......it occurred to her that som etimes a little betrayal is good for the soul.Elsewhere在别处, another darker secret was the object of an investigation.调查Gabrielle believed there was an excellent chance Helen Rowland would inform Carlos of his wife's extram arital 婚外的，私通的activities. Gabrielle knew she had to com e clean.People are com plicated creatures复杂的动物. On the one hand, able to perform great acts of charity.On the other, capable of the m ost underhanded秘密的，人手不足的，卑劣的forms of betrayal.It's a constant不变的battle that ranges within all of us, between the better angels of our nature, and the tem ptation诱惑of our inner dem ons 魔鬼，残忍的人.And sometimes the only way to ward守护保卫off the darkness.....is to shine照耀the light of com passion同情，怜悯.第十集Som etimes...No m atter how hard you try...Som e problems......can't be easily solved.To understand Maisy Gibbons, you first need to know how she spent her afternoons.Her m ornings were spent running errands任务for her husband. Her evenings were spent washing dishes and helping with homework.But her afternoons, well, they were spent in the com pany of m en.Frustrated. Misunderstood. Lonely m en. Willing to pay m oney to feel a little less lonely. And Maisy Gibbons was willing to help them.Every m orality play has its cast of characters. There is always an innocent victim...a deceitful villain坏人...aprosecutor告发者who seeks the truth...a m agistrate that dispenses分发分配，免除justice...and a lawyer律师who charges too m uch.This morality play was being produced at the Fairview County Courthouse. Its them es 主题were trust and betrayal.The next m orning started with a banging.猛击No one knew where Martha Huber was, and Edie Britt was starting to worry. Edie didn't like worrying. She felt it gave her wrinkles皱纹. So, out of concern for her face and Mrs. Huber, Edie decided to find out what was going on.Later that day, while Claire was out getting the boys wired on ice cream, Lynett e did som e wiring of her own.As Claire prepared for bed, she was unaware that som ewhere else in the Scavo house, the day she had just finished, was starting all over again.Lynette was relieved to see that Claire was doing a good job. And after further viewing, it dawned on Lynette...Claire might be doing her job...a little too well.As Gabrielle considered the vast em ptiness of her new surroundings, she was surprised to find there was only one thing she truly missed. Her husband.That night, Lynette settled in to watch her personal pick for feel-good m ovie of the year.Trust is a fragile thing...Once earned, it affords us trem endous freedom.But once trust is lost, it can be impossible to recover.Of course the truth is, we never know who we can t rust. Those we're closest to can betray us.And total strangers can com e to our rescue.In the end, m ost people decide to trust only them selves. It really is the simplest way to keep from getting burned.第十一集Suspicion ended in tragedy.Trust......was put on trial.And ex-husband......was replaced.And everyone......was getting in over their heads.Edie Britt could never understand why she didn't have any fem ale friends. Of course, she always tried to tell people she didn't need any, but the truth was, it bothered Edie that other women didn't seem to like her. Even after m oving to Wisteria Lane, Edie couldn't understand why her neighbors kept their distance.And then she met Martha Huber.Within five minutes, Mrs. Huber m anaged to disparage what Edie was wearing. In fact, whenever they got together, Mrs. Huber insulted her. She m ade fun of everything from Edie's m akeup to her taste in m en. Yes, Martha Huber could be cruel, offensive, and downright m ean. But Ed ie didn't care, because she was the first real friend Edie Britt had ever had. But now Martha Huber was missing. She had vanished without a trace, and Edie was not em barrassed to admit, she needed her back.It was in that mom ent that Edie finally saw the fa m ily resemblance.Mrs. Huber was missing. The words echoed down Wisteria Lane until every last resident was aware of her disappearance. By noon, dozens of neighbors had gathered. Some cam e to volunteer, som e cam e in sym pathy, and som e, cam e to learn exactly what the police knew and what they didn't.The next m orning while the search for Martha Huber continued, Lynette discovered a little family secret. One she wasn't even looking for.As the word's 'Constant Care' echoed in her head, Bree caught a sickening glimpse into her future,which prompted her to seek an old-fashioned remedy.In spite of Mrs. Huber's disappearance, life on Wisteria Lane started to return to normal. Until an intriguing discovery was m ade on a dirt road next to the interstate.As news spread of this m ysterious development, everyone in the neighborhood decided to band t ogether, to show their support, and to look for clues. Or worse.In spite of her mounting debt, Gabrielle was determined to prove she could get along just fine without Carlos' money.It wasn't until the electricity went out that she finally began to see the light.As the police interviewed the residents of Wisteria Lane about the m ysterious disappearance of Martha Huber, my husband, Paul, reasoned it would only be a m atter of tim e before their digging would begin to yield answers. Since he knew the police had no suspects, he decided to point them to the m ost logical candidate.You see, if there's one thing that Paul understood about the suburbs, it was t his:No one's ever m ore suspicious than a new neighbor who's just m oved in.We are all searching for som eone. That special person who will provide us what's missing in our lives. Som eone who can offer com panionship...or assistance...or security...And sometimes if we search very hard, we can find。

绝望的主妇1BREE: Paul, Zachary.ZACH: Hello Mrs. Van De Kamp.P AUL: Bree, you shouldn't have gone to all this trouble.(PAUL extends his hands to take the baskets from BREE, who moves the baskets out of his reach as he tries to take them from her.)BREE: It was no trouble at all. Now the basket with the red ribbon (holds up the basket) is filled with desserts for your guests. But the one with the blue ribbon (holds up the other basket) is just for you and Zachary. It's got rolls, muffins, breakfast type things.P AUL: Thank you.BREE: Well, the least I could do is make sure you boys had a decent meal to look forward to in the morning. I know you're out of your minds with grief.(REX, ANDREW and DANIELLE exchange long-suffering glances and mental eyeballing.)P AUL: Yes, we are.BREE: (beat) Of course, I will need the baskets back once you're done. (Smiling serenely)(REX looks with disbelief at his wife.)P AUL: (taken back) Of course.(BREE walks off with the baskets, leaving the rest of them stunned. REX is literally open-mouthed with disbelief.)(Cut to: EXT. MAYER HOUSE - PORCH --- DAY)(SUSAN and her daughter JULIE comes out of their front door. SUSAN holds a flat, rectangular dish covered in tin foil. The wind blows the foil off; SUSAN snatches it back and recovers the dish as she and JULIE walk down the pathway.NARRATOR: Susan Mayer, who lives across the street, brought macaroni and cheese. Her husband Karl always teased her about her macaroni, saying it wasthe only thing she knew how to cook, and she rarely made it well. It was too salty the night she and Karl moved into their new house.(Flashback to: SUSAN and KARL sitting at their kitchen table, laughing and smiling. JULIE, as a baby, is sitting between them.)NARRATOR: It was too watery the night she found lipstick on Karl's shirt.(Cut to: SUSAN throws a towel at KARL, who catches it and throws it on the ground, as they yell at each other. JULIE, as a toddler, sits there watchingher parents argue.) NARRATOR: She burned it the night Karl told her he was leaving her for his secretary.(Cut to: SUSAN and JULIE at about 13, sits at the table, the macaroni and cheese in the middle, untouched. KARL comes down the stairs carrying suitcases, and leaves via the kitchen door. SUSAN starts crying, as JULIE rubs her arm.)(End of flashback. Resume to present.)NARRATOR: A year had passed since the divorce. Susan was starting to think how nice it would be to have a man in her life, ev en one who would make funof her cooking. JULIE: Mom, why would someone kill themselves?SUSAN: Well, sometimes people are so unhappy they think it's the only way they can solve their problems.JULIE: But Mrs. Young always seemed happy.SUSAN: Yeah, sometimes people pretend to be one way on the outside andthey're totally different on the inside.JULIE: Oh you mean how Dad's girlfriend is always smiling and says nice things but deep down you just know she's a bitch.SUSAN: I don't like that word, Julie. But yeah, that's a great example.(Cut to: YOUNG HOUSE - LIVING ROOM -- WAKE --- DAY SU SAN and JULIE walkin the front door. SUSAN puts the dish down on the table and takes the tinfoil off . JULIE joins the teenage group standing next to the table.)JULIE: Hey, what's going on?(Cut to: YOUNG HOUSE - KITCHEN -- WAKE --- DAY SUSAN walks in, dumping the tin foil in the bin. BREE, GABRIELLE and LYNETTE are sitting around at the kitchen table. L YNETTE is holding the baby.)SUSAN: Sorry I'm late.GABRIELLE: Hi Susan.L YNETTE: (smiles at SUSAN) Hey.(BREE looks up at SUSAN, looking upset. SUSAN takes her place at the table, and looks at the one empty chair in the table, where MARY ALICE used to sit. She picks up the coffee pot, and starts pouring coffee into a mug. We followthe stream of coffee into the mug.)(Flashback to: The same stream of coffee being poured into a mug. SUSAN looks up at MARY ALICE, who is pouring coffee into SUSAN'S mug. MARY ALICEsits back down in her seat and puts down the coffee jug.)MARY ALICE (to SUSAN) :So? What did Karl say when you confronted him?SUSAN: You'll love this, he said it doesn't mean anything, it was just sex.(They all groan.)BREE: Oh yes, page one of the philanderer's handbook.SUSAN: Yeah, and then he got this Zen look on his face, and he said, you know Susan, most men live lives of quiet desperation.L YNETTE: Please tell me you punched him.SUSAN: No, I said, really? And what do most women lead, lives of noisy fulfillment?GABRIELLE: (raises her eyebrows) Hmm.MARY ALICE: Good for you.SUSAN: I mean, of all people, did he have to bang his secretary? I hadthat woman over for brunch. GABRIELLE: It's like my grandmother always said,an erect penis doesn't have a conscience.L YNETTE: Even the limp ones aren't that ethical.BREE: This is half the reason I joined the NRA. (SUSAN looks at her.) Well, when Rex started going to those medical conferences, I wanted at the back ofhis mind that he had a loving wife at home, with a loaded Smith and Wesson.MARY ALICE: Lynnie? Tom's always away on business. Do you ever worry he might..?L YNETTE: Oh, please, the man's gotten me pregnant three times in four years. I wish he was having sex with someone else. (Smiles)BREE: So Susan, is he going to stop seeing that woman?SUSAN: I don't know. (Smiles, tearing up) I'm sorry you guys, I just (I)just don't know how I'm going to survive this.MARY ALICE: Listen to me. (Puts her hand on SUSAN's hand) We all have moments of desperation. But if we can face them head on, that's how we find out just how strong we really are.(SUSAN puts her other hand on top of MARY ALICE's hand, smiling at her.)(End of flashback. Resume to present.)BREE: Susan? Susan. (SUSAN withdraws her hand from the same position from the flashback.) I was just saying Paul wants us to go over on Friday. He needs us to go through Mary Alice's closet, and help pack up her things. He says he can't face doing it by himself.SUSAN: Sure, that's fine.BREE: Are you OK?SUSAN: Yeah. I'm just so angry. If Mary Alice was having problems, she should have come to us; she should have let us help her.GABRIELLE: What kind of problems could she have had? She was healthy, had a great home, a nice family. Her life was? -L YNETTE: -our life.GABRIELLE: No, if Mary Alice was having some sort of crisis, we'd have known. She lives 50 feet away, for god's sakes.SUSAN: Gabby, the woman killed herself. Something must've been going on.(They all look down and consider this point, as P AUL, unseen, leans against the living room doorway, eavesdropping on their conversation. He sips his drink, looking very shifty and suspicious, like he knows more than he's letting on.)(Cut to: YOUNG HOUSE - DINING ROOM -- WAKE --- DAY)(Food is set out on the table buffet-style. SUSAN walks into the room, where MIKE is spooning some of SUSAN's macaroni and cheese onto his plate)SUSAN: Oh, I wouldn't eat that if I were you.MIKE: Why?SUSAN: I made it, trust me. (MIKE prepares to take a bite) Hey, hey, doyou have a death wish?MIKE: No, I just refuse to believe that anybody can screw up macaroni and cheese.(MIKE takes a bite of the macaroni, as SUSAN gestures apologetically, smiling.)MIKE: Oh my god. (Makes a face) How did you? It tastes like it's burnt and undercooked.SUSAN: Yeah, I get that a lot. Here you go.(SUSAN gets a tissue and gives it to him, as he spits his mouthful of macaroni and cheese into the tissue.)MIKE: Thanks. I'm Mike Delfino, I just rented out the Sim's house next door.SUSAN: Susan Mayer, I live across the street.MIKE: Oh yeah, Mrs. Huber told me about you, said you illustratechildren's books.SUSAN: Yeah I'm very big with the under 5 set. (MIKE laughs) What do you do?MIKE: Plumber. So if you ever have a clog. Or something.SUSAN: (laughs) Now that everybody's seen that I've brought something, I should probably just throw this out.(JULIE looks over to see SUSAN and MIKE flirting with each other, smiles. SUSAN takes the dish of macaroni and walks off. MIKE watches her as she leaves.She stops and looks back at MIKE. She smiles, and then continues walking to the next room.)(Cut to: INT. YOUNG HOUSE - BACK ROOM WINDOW SEAT -- WAKE --- DAY LYNETTE struggles with the baby, covering it in a blanket. MRS. HUBER hurries up the path, seesL YNETTE through the window and comes in.)L YNETTE: (to baby) Ow! Ease up, you little vampire.MRS. HUBER: Lynette! I've been looking all over for you.L YNETTE: Oh. (Smiles, distracted by the baby)MRS. HUBER: Are you aware of what your sons are doing?(LYNETTE's smile drops instantly)(Cut to: EXT. YOUNG HOUSE - POOL SIDE --- DAY The SCAVO kids are swimming in the pool, splashing, generally making lots of noise. Their nice shoes and clothes are discarded at the poolside.)SCAVO kids: Stop. Arrrggggh. Hah!(LYNETTE hurries down the path to the poolside holding the baby. She stops at the poolside, appalled at what she sees.)L YNETTE: What are you doing!? We are at a wake!PRESTON: When we got here, you said we could go in the pool.L YNETTE: (crouches down) I said you could go by the pool. Do you have your swimsuits on??PORTER: Yeah, we put them on under our clothes just before we left.L YNETTE: You three planned this?? Alright, that's it. Get out!PORTER: No!L YNETTE: No? I am your mother. You have to do what I say. Come on.PRESTON: We wanna swim and you can't stop us.(LYNETTE looks around at the whole neighborhood watching, helpless. The SCAVO kids all float in the water, their arms crossed in defiance. Seeing this, LYNETTE raises her eyebrow and sets her face with angry resolve.)L YNETTE: (gives the baby to a man standing nearby) Here.(LYNETTE steps into the pool, holding her skirt as she walks down the pool steps towards the boys. The boys' mouths drop open in surprise.)L YNETTE: Get out. Or I will get in this pool and just grab you, get out! Get over here. Get over here. Get back or I'll kill you.((LYNETTE struggles in the pool with the boys, splashing around as theboys try to swim away from her.)L YNETTE: That's right, get over here. Go, go, go, ugh. Move it. Out. Get out.(PAUL and ZACH walk out by the pool, watching in amazement. SUSAN puts her hands over her mouth with embarrassment, as REX, ANDREW and DANIELLE, laughing in amazement, comes out to watch. The water flies everywhere as LYNETTE struggles to catch hold of her kids. P AUL looks down at his jacket as water splashes onto his suit. L YNETTE manages to grab onto PRESTON's foot, dragging him towards the edge of the pool, as she catches hold of PARKER's foot as well. She manages to pull them up the steps and out of the pool, herself soaking wet. She glares at PORTER floating in the water, who gets out of the pool in a hurry.L YNETTE takes the baby from the man, then goes up to PAUL, flustered, as the boys gather their clothes.)L YNETTE: Paul. We have to leave now. Once again, I am so sorry for your loss. (to kids) Go!(LYNETTE hurries the boys along the path as PAUL watches them leave. He turns, and looks into the pool. The camera moves into the pool, looking up at PAUL as he stares menacingly into the watery depths.)NARRATOR: Lynette shouldn't have been so concerned about my husband. Hehad other things on his mind. Things below the surface.------------------------------------------------------------CUT TO: [EXT. WISTERIA LANE --- DAWN](A newspaper boy on a bike rides along the road, throwing newspapers at each home as he rides by.)NARRATOR: The morning after my funeral, my friends and neighbors quietly went back to their busy, busy lives. Some did their cooking.(Cut to: INT. SCAVO HOUSE - KITCHEN --- DAY LYNETTE struggles with her kids in her home, as the boys throw cereal around.)NARRATOR: And some did their cleaning.(Cut to: INT. VAN DE KAMP HOUSE - BATHROOM --- DAY BREE kneels next to the toilet, holding a scrubber, scrubbing the toilet ferociously.)NARRATOR: And some did their yoga.(Cut to: INT. SOLIS HOUSE - FOYER --- DAY We look out at GABRIELLE, who strikes a yoga stance on a mat in front of her open door.)NARRATOR: Others did their homework.(Cut to: EXT. WISTERIA LANE --- DAY A soccer ball is kicked high in theair towards a house.)(Cut to: INT. DELFINO HOUSE - FOYER --- DAY The sound of a doorbell ringing. The door opens, and MIKE looks out at JULIE, who smiles apologetically.)JULIE: Hi.(MIKE's dog barks, and MIKE puts a hand on the dog's neck to calm it down. He looks at JULIE.)JULIE: I'm Julie; I kicked my soccer ball into your backyard.MIKE: Oh, OK. Well, let's go round and get it. (To dog) Stay.(Cut to: INT. MAYER HOUSE - SUSAN- WORK STUDIO --- DAY JULIE paces the floor walking back and forth, throwing the soccer ball up and down as she talks. SUSAN is working on her illustrations.)JULIE: (to SUSAN) His wife died a year ago, he wanted to stay in LA but there were too many memories. He's renting for tax purposes, but he's hoping to buy a place real soon.SUSAN: I can't believe you went over there.JULIE: Hey, I saw you both flirting at the wake. You're obviously into each other. Now that you know he's single, you can ask him out.SUSAN: Julie, I like Mr. Delfino, I do. It's just, I don't know if I'm ready to start dating yet.JULIE: Ugh, you need to get back out there. Come on. How long has it been since you're had sex? (SUSAN's pen halts stroke. She turns to look at JULIE, open-mouthed.) Are you mad that I asked you that?SUSAN: No, I'm just trying to remember. (JULIE tilts her head to one side, smiling at SUSAN, who turns back to her drawing.) I don't wanna talk to you about my love life anymore, it weirds me out.JULIE: I wouldn't have said anything it's just?SUSAN: (turns around to look at JULIE) What?JULIE: I heard Dad's girlfriend asking if you'd dated anyone since the divorce, and Dad said he doubted it. (SUSAN looks down at her lap.) And then they both laughed. (SUSAN turns to look at JULIE, mouth open in indignation. That does it.)(Cut to: EXT. WISTERIA LANE --- DAY SUSAN, holding a pot-plant, hurries along the road and walks up the steps to MIKE's house to ring his doorbell. We hear the dog bark as MIKE opens the door.)MIKE: Hey, Susan.SUSAN: Hi Mike. (Smiles) I brought you a little housewarming gift. I probably should've brought something by earlier, but...MIKE: Actually, you're the first in the neighborhood to stop by.SUSAN: Really? (She laughs)NARRATOR: Susan knew she was lucky. An eligible bachelor had moved onto Wisteria Lane, and she was the first to find out. But she also kne w that good news travels quickly.EDIE: (waving as she walks, holding a dish) Hello there!NARRATOR: (slow motion shot of Edie jogging towards MIKE and SUSAN) Edie Britt was the most predatory divorcee in a 5 block radius. Her conquests were numerous. (Flashback to: EDIE and a workman in her living room. She grabs him, as his toolbox drops on the ground with a crash.)NARRATOR: Varied?(Cut to: a tennis coach standing behind EDIE in her living room, helping her swing a tennis racquet with her right hand. She turns and kisses him, pushing him on to her couch. )NARRATOR: And legendary.(Cut to: EDIE, sitting on her couch. She looks up at a priest, and pulls him down on top of her. He yells, his Bible dropping onto the ground.)(End of flashback. Resume to present.)(EDIE walks up to the porch, pushing her sunglasses onto her head.)EDIE: Hi Susan, I hope I'm not interrupting. You must be Mike Delfino. Hi, I'm Edie. Britt. I live over there (points). Welcome to Wisteria Lane. (SUSAN shifts uncomfortably.) NARRATOR: Susan had met the enemy, and she was a slut.MIKE: Thank you, what's this?EDIE: Sausage Puttenesca. It's just something I threw together. (SUSAN looks at her disbelievingly.)MIKE: Thanks, Edie. (Laughs) That's great. Uh, I'd invite you both in, but I was sorta in the middle of something.SUSAN: (overlapping EDIE) Oh, I'm late for an appointment anyway.EDIE: (overlapping SUSAN) Oh, no problem, I just wanted to say hi.MIKE: Well, thanks.(SUSAN and EDIE walk down the steps of the porch, and down the walkway.)NARRATOR: And just like that, the race for Mike Delfino had begun. For a moment, Susan wondered if her rivalry with Edie would remain friendly.EDIE: (turns suddenly) Oh, Mike. I heard you're a plumber?MIKE: Yeah.EDIE: Do you think you could stop by later tonight and take a look at my pipes?NARRATOR: But she was reminded that when it came to men? Women don't fight fair.MIKE: Sure.EDIE: Thanks. (EDIE smiles, following SUSAN down the path.) Bye Susan. (SUSAN waves halfheartedly as she walks in the opposite direction towards her home.)------------------------------------------------------------CUT TO: [INT. SOLIS HOUSE -- DINING ROOM --- DAY]GABRIELLE: [OS] You can't order me around like I'm a child!(GABRIELLE paces the floor, hands on her waist as CARLOS packs his suitcase for work)CARLOS: Gabrielle...GABRIELLE: No. No, no, no, I'm not going.CARLOS: It's business, Tanaka expects everyone to bring their wives.GABRIELLE: Every time I'm around that man, he tries to grab my ass.CARLOS: (puts his hand on GABRIELLE's shoulder) I made over $200,000 doing business with him last year. If he wants to grab your ass, you let him.(CARLOS walks out of the front door and down the porch s teps. He stops at the bottom of the steps, and looks sideways to whe re JOHN is cutting a bush with a p air of gardening shears.)CARLOS: John!JOHN: (pricks his finger on a rose thorn) Ow. (Turns around to look at CARLOS) Mr. Solis. You scared me.CARLOS: Why is that bush still there? I told you to dig it up last week.JOHN: I didn't have time last week.CARLOS: I don't wanna hear your excuses, just take care of it.(GABRIELLE walks out the front door and walks down the porch steps,putting her arms on her waist.)GABRIELLE: (to CARLOS) I really hate the way you talk to me.CARLOS: (walks up to her) And I really hate that I spent $15,000 on your diamond necklace that youcouldn't live without. But I'm learning to deal with it. (JOHN sucks his finger, watching the argument) So. Can I tell Tanaka we'll be there tomorrow night?GABRIELLE: (turns sideways to look at JOHN) John. We have bandages top shelf in the kitchen.JOHN: Thanks, Mrs. Solis. (Walks between CARLOS and GABRIELLE, up the porch steps and into the house.)GABRIELLE: (looks at CARLOS coolly) Fine. I'll go. But I'm keeping my back pressed against the wall the entire time.CARLOS: (smiles as he walks backwards) See? Now this is what a marriage is all about - compromise. (Turns around and walks towards his car)(Cut to: INT. SOLIS HOUSE - KITCHEN/DINING ROOM --- DAY JOHN is putting a bandage on his finger. GABRIELLE walks in the front door and comes up to him.)GABRIELLE: Is your finger ok?JOHN: Yeah, yeah, it's just a small cut.GABRIELLE: Let me see. (Takes his hand, and starts kissing his finger) Mmmm. (She puts her arms around his neck, kissing him as she sliding her hands up his back. JOHN breaks off the kiss, backing off to the。

The script of Desperate HousewivesSeason 1第一集：OPEN ON: [EXT. WISTERIA LANE --- MORNING](A school bus drives up the road. Friendly "Good Morning" are exchanged between neighbours. A woman pushes a baby carriage along, while a car pulls out of a driveway and drives down the road. GABRIELLE jogs past a fence on the sidewalk.Pan to:(EXT.YOUNG HOUSE - FRONT YARD)(MARY ALICE comes out of her front door and down the porch steps, carrying a basket of flowers. She kneels in front of her flowerbed, and smells a flower, smiling faintly.)NARRATOR: My name is Mary Alice Young. When you read this morning's paper, you may come across an article about the unusual day I had last week. Normally, there's never anything newsworthy about my life. That all changed last Thursday. Of course everything seemed as normal at first. I made my breakfast for my family.(Cut to:MARY ALICE, carrying a plate of waffles to the breakfast table, where PAUL and ZACH are sitting. She passes the plate to PAUL.)MARY ALICE::Here we are. Waffles.NARRATOR: I performed my chores.(Cut to:MARY ALICE, flipping a switch on the washing machine, and then lifting a basket of clothing off the machine.NARRATOR: I completed my projects.(Cut to:MARY ALICE, stirring a paintbrush in a can of paint and painting a garden chair)NARRATOR: I ran my errands (Cut to:MARY ALICE picking up the dry-cleaning, then retrieving the mail from the mailbox.)NARRATOR: In truth, I spent the day as I spend every other day - quietly polishing the routine of my life until it gleamed with perfection.(Cut to:MARY ALICE, straightening a photo frame on top of the piano. She sighs with satisfaction, a contented smile on her face.)NARRATOR: That's why it was so astonishing when I decided to go to my hallway closet to retrieve a revolver that had never been used.(Cut to:MARY ALICE takes a box off a shelf in the closet. Looking worried and distraught, she shakily puts a revolver to her temple. We see a finger pulling the trigger, and a loud shot is heard. The camera stays on the YOUNG family picture, as the blurred reflection of MARY ALICE is shown in the frame of the picture falling to the ground.)(Cut to: MRS. HUBER'S HOUSE - KITCHEN)(MRS. HUBER's finger dips into a pool of red sauce (resembling blood). She licks the sauce on her finger, as she turns her head towards the YOUNG house, puzzled by the sound she's heard.)NARRATOR: My body was discovered by my neighbour, Mrs. Martha Huber, who had been startled by a strange popping sound. Her curiosity aroused, Mrs. Huber tried to think of a reason for dropping in on me unannounced. After some initial hesitation, she decided to return the blender she had borrowed from me 6 months before.(MRS. HUBER takes a blender labeled Property of MARY ALICE YOUNG off a shelf, and hurries next door to ring the doorbell. Hearing no answer, she hurries to the side of the house, where she peers inside thewindow and sees MARY ALICE's dead body lying on the ground, a pool of blood next to her. She screams. We see MRS. HUBER hurry back to her own house.)MRS HUBER: (on the phone) It's my neighbour. I think she's been shot, there's blood everywhere. Yes, you've got to send an ambulance. You've got to send one right now!(MRS. HUBER hangs up the phone. She stands in the kitchen, lips trembling, fighting tears.) NARRATOR: And for a moment, Mrs. Huber stood motionless in her kitchen, grief-stricken by this senseless tragedy. But, only for a moment.(MRS. HUBER turns her head sideways, noticing the blender sitting on the kitchen counter.She rips the label off the blender, and puts it back on her shelf.)NARRATOR: If there was one thing Mrs. Huber was known for, it was her ability to look on the bright side. (MRS. HUBER shuts the cupboard door.)OPENING CREDITsCUT TO: [EXT. WISTERIA LANE -- DAY](Residents wearing black clothing and bearing plates and baskets of food are walking towards the YOUNG household)NARRATOR: I was laid to rest on a Monday. After the funeral, all the residents of Wisteria Lane came to pay their respects. And as people do in this situation, they brought food.(Pan to:LYNETTE, holding a plate of fried chicken with one hand as she walks.)NARRATOR: Lynette Scavo brought fried chicken. Lynette had a great family recipe for fried chicken. (Flashback to: LYNETTE talking animatedly in a conference room as she points at a projected screen with charts and figures, a room full of corporate businesspeople taking notes or watching as she shows her presentation, smiling with confidence.)NARRATOR: Of course, she didn't cook much as she was moving up the corporate ladder. She didn't have the time.(Fade to: The doctor's office, where he performs a sonogram on LYNETTE's exposed belly, as LYNETTE lies in a chair watching the screen, laughing with excitement. Her husband, TOM, sits next to her as he watches with amazement at the sonogram, holding LYNETTE's hand.)NARRATOR: But when her doctor announced Lynette was pregnant, her husband Tom had an idea. Why not quit your job? Kids do much better with stay at home mums; it was so much less stressful.(We see TOM gesturing, talking animatedly as he proposes this idea to LYNETTE, who nods hesitantly in agreement as she looks at him.)NARRATOR: But this was not the case.(End of flashback. Resume to present.)(LYNETTE pushes a baby carriage with her free hand, looking weary. The SCAVO children, Twins PRESTON & PORTER, and the younger brother PARKER, jostles each other as they walk on the sidewalk in front of the carriage, bickering rowdily with each other.)NARRATOR: In fact, Lynette's life had become so hectic she was now forced to get her chicken from a fast food restaurant. Lynette would have appreciated the irony of it if she stopped to think about it, but she couldn't. She didn't have the time.(LYNETTE pushes in front of the 3 boys, trying to separate them.)LYNETTE: Hey, hey, hey, hey!(She kneels in front of them with a stern look on her face.)LYNETTE: Stop it, stop it, stop it. Stop it.PRESTON: But Mom!LYNETTE: No, you are going to behave today. I am not going to be humiliated in front of the entire neighbourhood. And, just so you know how serious I am... (reaches inside her top and pulls a folded pieceof paper from her pocket)PRESTON: What's that?LYNETTE: Santa's cell-phone number.PORTER: How'd you get that?LYNETTE: I know someone, who knows someone, who knows an elf. And if anyone of you acts up, so help me, I will call Santa and tell him you want socks for Christmas. You willing to risk that?SCAVO kids: Uh-uh! (all shake their heads vehemently)LYNETTE: Okay.(She tucks the paper back in her pocket, and straightens.)LYNETTE: Let's get this over with.(The camera pans across the road.)(Pan to:EXT. SOLIS HOUSE - FRONT YARD)(CARLOS stands outside, hands in his pocket, turning his head to see GABRIELLE come out of the front door, holding a plate in one hand and a bag in the other. She wears a black halter neck dress, black high heels and an expensive diamond necklace. )NARRATOR: Gabrielle Solis, who lives down the block, brought a spicy paella.(Flashback to: GABRIELLE, strutting down a runway, wearing a pink dress as she models, the crowd is clapping and many cameras are flashing. The camera pans to CARLOS sitting in the audience.) NARRATOR: Since her modelling days in New York, Gabrielle had developed a taste for rich food and rich men. Carlos, who worked in mergers and acquisitions, proposed on their third date. Gabrielle was touched when tears welled up in his eyes.(Flash to: GABRIELLE and CARLOS, sitting in a restaurant. CARLOS holds out a ring as GABRIELLE gasps, excitedly hopping up and down in her chair as she agrees, smiling and laughing. We see the gleam of CARLOS'tears of happiness as he smiles at her.)NARRATOR: But she soon discovered this happened every time Carlos closed a big deal.(End of flashback. Resume to present.)(GABRIELLE walks down the pathway to where CARLOS is waiting, and hands him the plate.They start walking together towards the YOUNG house.)NARRATOR: Gabrielle liked her paella piping hot. However, her relationship with her husband was considerably cooler.CARLOS: If you talk to Al Mason at this thing, I want you to casually mention how much I paid for your necklace.GABRIELLE: Why don't I just pin the receipt to my chest?CARLOS: He let me know how much he paid for his wife's new convertible. Look, just work it into the conversation.GABRIELLE: There's no way I can just work that in, Carlos.CARLOS: Why not? At the Donohue party, everyone was talking about mutual funds. And you found a way to mention you slept with half the Yankee outfield.GABRIELLE: I'm telling you, it came up in the context of the conversation.CARLOS: Hey, people are starting to stare. Can you keep your voice down please?GABRIELLE: (sigh) Absolutely. Wouldn't want them to think we're not happy.CUT TO: [EXT. YOUNG HOUSE - PORCH].(The door opens to BREE's serenely smiling face. We see REX, her husband, behind her, an expression of exasperation on his face.)NARRATOR: Bree Van De Kamp, who lives next door, brought baskets of muffins she baked from scratch. Bree was known for her cooking.(Flashback to: BREE, sitting at a sewing machine, making clothes.)NARRATOR: And for making her own clothes.(Cut to:BREE, garbed in work-wear, planting a tree.)NARRATOR: And for doing her own gardening.(Cut to:BREE, using a hand knife to slice open the cover of a stuffed chair.)NARRATOR: And for reupholstering her own furniture.(End of flashback. Resume to present.)NARRATOR: Yes, Bree's many talents were known throughout the neighbourhood. And everyone on Wisteria Lane thought of Bree as the perfect wife and mother. Everyone, that is, except her own family. (We see an exasperated REX, and her children - an annoyed ANDREW and a frazzled-looking DANIELLE - behind BREE, the very image of perfection. She carries a basket of baked goods in each hand as she walks up to PAUL and ZACH, looking sympathetic.)BREE: Paul, Zachary.ZACH: Hello Mrs. Van De Kamp.PAUL: Bree, you shouldn't have gone to all this trouble.(PAUL extends his hands to take the baskets from BREE, who moves the baskets out of his reach as he tries to take them from her.)BREE: It was no trouble at all. Now the basket with the red ribbon (holds up the basket) is filled with desserts for your guests. But the one with the blue ribbon (holds up the other basket) is just for you and Zachary. It's got rolls, muffins, breakfast type things.PAUL: Thank you.BREE: Well, the least I could do is make sure you boys had a decent meal to look forward to in the morning.I know you're out of your minds with grief.(REX, ANDREW and DANIELLE exchange long-suffering glances and mental eyeballing.)PAUL: Yes, we are.BREE: (beat) Of course, I will need the baskets back once you're done. (smiling serenely)(REX looks with disbelief at his wife.)PAUL: (taken back) Of course.(BREE walks off with the baskets, leaving the rest of them stunned. REX is literally open-mouthed with disbelief.)(Cut to:EXT. MEYER HOUSE - PORCH --- DAY)(SUSAN and her daughter JULIE comes out of their front door. SUSAN holds a flat, rectangular dish covered in tin foil. The wind blows the foil off, SUSAN snatches it back and recovers the dish as she and JULIE walk down the pathway.NARRATOR: Susan Meyer, who lives across the street, brought macaroni and cheese. Her husband Carl always teased her about her macaroni, saying it was the only thing she knew how to cook, and she rarely made it well. It was too salty the night she and Carl moved into their new house.(Flashback to: SUSAN and CARL sitting at their kitchen table, laughing and smiling. JULIE, as a baby, is sitting between them.)NARRATOR: It was too watery the night she found lipstick on Carl's shirt.(Cut to:SUSAN throws a towel at CARL, who catches it and throws it on the ground, as they yell at each other. JULIE, as a toddler, sits there watching her parents argue.)NARRATOR: She burned it the night Carl told her he was leaving her for his secretary.(Cut to:SUSAN and JULIE at about 13, sits at the table, the macaroni and cheese in the middle, untouched. CARL comes down the stairs carrying suitcases, and leaves via the kitchen door. SUSAN starts crying, as JULIE rubs her arm.)(End of flashback. Resume to present.)NARRATOR: A year had passed since the divorce. Susan was starting to think how nice it would be to have a man in her life, even one who would make fun of her cooking.JULIE: Mom, why would someone kill themselves?SUSAN: Well, sometimes people are so unhappy they think it's the only way they can solve their problems. JULIE: But Mrs. Young always seemed happy.SUSAN: Yeah, sometimes people pretend to be one way on the outside and they're totally different on the inside.JULIE: Oh you mean how Dad's girlfriend is always smiling and says nice things but deep down you just know she's a bitch.SUSAN: I don't like that word, Julie. But yeah, that's a great example.(Cut to: YOUNG HOUSE - LIVING ROOM -- WAKE --- DAY SUSAN and JULIE walk in the front door. SUSAN puts the dish down on the table and takes the tin foil off. JULIE joins the teenage group standing next to the table.)JULIE: Hey, what's going on?(Cut to:YOUNG HOUSE - KITCHEN -- WAKE --- DAY SUSAN walks in, dumping the tin foil in the bin. BREE, GABRIELLE and LYNETTE are sitting around at the kitchen table. LYNETTE is holding the baby.) SUSAN: Sorry I'm late.GABRIELLE: Hi Susan.LYNETTE: (smiles at SUSAN) Hey.(BREE looks up at SUSAN, looking upset. SUSAN takes her place at the table, and looks at the one empty chair in the table, where MARY ALICE used to sit. She picks up the coffee pot, and starts pouring coffee into a mug. We follow the stream of coffee into the mug.)(Flashback to: The same stream of coffee being poured into a mug. SUSAN looks up at MARY ALICE, who is pouring coffee into SUSAN'S mug. MARY ALICE sits back down in her seat and puts down the coffee jug.)MARY ALICE:(to SUSAN) So? What did Carl say when you confronted him?SUSAN: You'll love this, he said it doesn't mean anything, it was just sex.(They all groan.)BREE: Oh yes, page one of the philanderer's handbook.SUSAN: Yeah, and then he got this Zen look on his face, and he said, you know Susan, most men live lives of quiet desperation.LYNETTE: Please tell me you punched him.SUSAN: No, I said, really? And what do most women lead, lives of noisy fulfillment?GABRIELLE: (raises her eyebrows) Hmm.MARY ALICE: Good for you.SUSAN: I mean, of all people, did he have to bang his secretary? I had that woman over for brunch. GABRIELLE: It's like my grandmother always said, an erect penis doesn't have a conscience. LYNETTE: Even the limp ones aren't that ethical.BREE: This is half the reason I joined the NRA. (SUSAN looks at her.) Well, when Rex started going to those medical conferences, I wanted at the back of his mind that he had a loving wife at home, with a loaded Smith and Wesson.MARY ALICE: Lynnie? Tom's always away on business. Do you ever worry he might..?LYNETTE: Oh, please, the man's gotten me pregnant three times in four years. I wish he was having sex with someone else. (smiles)BREE: So Susan, is he going to stop seeing that woman?SUSAN: I don't know. (smiles, tearing up) I'm sorry you guys, I just... I just don't know how I'm going to survive this.MARY ALICE: Listen to me. (puts her hand on SUSAN's hand) We all have moments of desperation. But if we can face them head on, that's how we find out just how strong we really are.(SUSAN puts her other hand on top of MARY ALICE's hand, smiling at her.)(End of flashback. Resume to present.)BREE: Susan? Susan. (SUSAN withdraws her hand from the same position from the flashback.) I was just saying Paul wants us to go over on Friday. He needs us to go through Mary Alice's closet, and help pack up her things. He says he can't face doing it by himself.SUSAN: Sure, that's fine.BREE: Are you OK?SUSAN: Yeah. I'm just so angry. If Mary Alice was having problems, she should have come to us; she should have let us help her.GABRIELLE: What kind of problems could she have had? She was healthy, had a great home, a nice family. Her life was?-LYNETTE: -our life.GABRIELLE: No, if Mary Alice was having some sort of crisis, we'd have known. She lives 50 feet away, for god's sakes.SUSAN: Gabby, the woman killed herself. Something must've been going on.(They all look down and consider this point, as PAUL, unseen, leans against the living room doorway, eavesdropping on their conversation. He sips his drink, looking very shifty and suspicious, like he knows more than he's letting on.)(Cut to:YOUNG HOUSE - DINING ROOM -- WAKE --- DAY)(Food is set out on the table buffet-style. SUSAN walks into the room, where MIKE is spooning some of SUSAN's macaroni and cheese onto his plate)SUSAN: Oh, I wouldn't eat that if I were you.MIKE: Why?SUSAN: I made it, trust me. (MIKE prepares to take a bite) Hey, hey, do you have a death wish?MIKE: No, I just refuse to believe that anybody can screw up macaroni and cheese.(MIKE takes a bites of the macaroni, as SUSAN gestures apologetically, smiling.)MIKE: Oh my god. (makes a face) How did you?it tastes like it's burnt and undercooked.SUSAN: Yeah, I get that a lot. Here you go.(SUSAN gets a tissue and gives it to him, as he spits his mouthful of macaroni and cheese into the tissue.) MIKE: Thanks. I'm Mike Delfino, I just rented out the Sim's house next door.SUSAN: Susan Meyer, I live across the street.MIKE: Oh yeah, Mrs. Huber told me about you, said you illustrate children's booksSUSAN: Yeah I'm very big with the under 5 set. (MIKE laughs) What do you do?MIKE: Plumber. So if you ever have a clog. Or something.SUSAN: (laughs) Now that everybody's seen that I've brought something, I should probably just throw this out.(JULIE looks over to see SUSAN and MIKE flirting with each other, smiles. SUSAN takes the dish of macaroni and walks off. MIKE watches her as she leaves. She stops and looks back at MIKE. She smiles, then continues walking to the next room.)(Cut to:INT. YOUNG HOUSE - BACK ROOM WINDOW SEAT -- WAKE --- DAY LYNETTE struggles withthe baby, covering it in a blanket. MRS. HUBER hurries up the path, sees LYNETTE through the window and comes in.)LYNETTE: (to baby) Ow! Ease up, you little vampire.MRS. HUBER: Lynette! I've been looking all over for you.LYNETTE: Oh. (smiles, distracted by the baby)MRS. HUBER:Are you aware of what your sons are doing?(LYNETTE's smile drops instantly)(Cut to:EXT. YOUNG HOUSE - POOL SIDE --- DAY The SCAVO kids are swimming in the pool, splashing, generally making lots of noise. Their nice shoes and clothes are discarded at the poolside.)SCAVO kids: Stop. Arrrggggh. Hah!(LYNETTE hurries down the path to the poolside holding the baby. She stops at the poolside, appalled at what she sees.)LYNETTE: What are you doing!? We are at a wake!PRESTON: When we got here, you said we could go in the pool.LYNETTE: (crouches down) I said you could go by the pool. Do you have your swimsuits on?? PORTER: Yeah, we put them on under our clothes just before we left.LYNETTE: You three planned this?? Alright, that's it. Get out!PORTER: No!LYNETTE: No? I am your mother. You have to do what I say. Come on.PRESTON: We wanna swim and you can't stop us.(LYNETTE looks around at the whole neighbourhood watching, helpless. The SCAVO kids all float in the water, their arms crossed in defiance. Seeing this, LYNETTE raises her eyebrow and sets her face with angry resolve.)LYNETTE: (gives the baby to a man standing nearby) Here.(LYNETTE steps into the pool, holding her skirt as she walks down the pool steps towards the boys. The boys' mouths drop open in surprise.)LYNETTE: Get out. Or I will get in this pool and just grab you, get out! Get over here. Get over here. Get back or I'll kill you.((LYNETTE struggles in the pool with the boys, splashing around as the boys try to swim away from her.) LYNETTE: That's right, get over here. Go, go, go, ugh. Move it. Out. Get out.(PAUL and ZACH walk out by the pool, watching in amazement. SUSAN puts her hands over her mouth with embarrassment, as REX, ANDREW and DANIELLE, laughing in amazement, come out to watch. The water flies everywhere as LYNETTE struggles to catch hold of her kids. PAUL looks down at his jacket as water splashes onto his suit. LYNETTE manages to grab onto PRESTON's foot, dragging him towards the edge of the pool, as she catches hold of PARKER's foot as well. She manages to pull them up the steps and out of the pool, herself soaking wet. She glares at PORTER floating in the water, who gets out of the pool in a hurry.LYNETTE takes the baby from the man, then goes up to PAUL, flustered, as the boys gather their clothes.) LYNETTE: Paul. We have to leave now. Once again, I am so sorry for your loss. (to kids) Go! (LYNETTE hurries the boys along the path as PAUL watches them leave. He turns, and looks into the pool. The camera moves into the pool, looking up at PAUL as he stares menacingly into the watery depths.) NARRATOR: Lynette shouldn't have been so concerned about my husband. He had other things on his mind. Things below the surface.CUT TO: [EXT. WISTERIA LANE --- DAWN](A newspaper boy on a bike rides along the road, throwing newspapers at each home as he rides by.) NARRATOR: The morning after my funeral, my friends and neighbours quietly went back to their busy,busy lives. Some did their cooking.(Cut to:INT. SCAVO HOUSE - KITCHEN --- DAY LYNETTE struggles with her kids in her home, as the boys throw cereal around.)NARRATOR: And some did their cleaning.(Cut to:INT. VAN DE KAMP HOUSE - BATHROOM --- DAY BREE kneels next to the toilet, holding a scrubber, scrubbing the toilet ferociously.)NARRATOR: And some did their yoga.(Cut to:INT. SOLIS HOUSE - FOYER --- DAY We look out at GABRIELLE, who strikes a yoga stance on a mat in front of her open door.)NARRATOR: Others did their homework.(Cut to:EXT. WISTERIA LANE --- DAY A soccer ball is kicked high in the air towards a house.)(Cut to:INT. DELFINO HOUSE - FOYER --- DAY The sound of a doorbell ringing. The door opens, and MIKE looks out at JULIE, who smiles apologetically.)JULIE: Hi.(MIKE's dog barks, and MIKE puts a hand on the dog's neck to calm it down. He looks at JULIE.) JULIE: I'm Julie, I kicked my soccer ball into your backyard.MIKE: Oh, OK. Well, let's go round and get it. (to dog) Stay.(Cut to:INT. MEYER HOUSE - SUSAN- WORK STUDIO --- DAY JULIE paces the floor walking back and forth, throwing the soccer ball up and down as she talks. SUSAN is working on her illustrations.)JULIE: (to SUSAN) His wife died a year ago, he wanted to stay in LA but there were too many memories. He's renting for tax purposes, but he's hoping to buy a place real soon.SUSAN: I can't believe you went over there.JULIE: Hey, I saw you both flirting at the wake. You're obviously into each other. Now that you know he's single, you can ask him out.SUSAN: Julie, I like Mr. Delfino, I do. It's just, I don't know if I'm ready to start dating yet.JULIE: Ugh, you need to get back out there. Come on. How long has it been since you're had sex? (SUSAN's pen halts stroke. She turns to look at JULIE, open-mouthed.) Are you mad that I asked you that? SUSAN: No, I'm just trying to remember. (JULIE tilts her head to one side, smiling at SUSAN, who turns back to her drawing.) I don't wanna talk to you about my love life anymore, it weirds me out.JULIE: I wouldn't have said anything it's just?SUSAN: (turns around to look at JULIE) What?JULIE: I heard Dad's girlfriend asking if you'd dated anyone since the divorce, and Dad said he doubted it. (SUSAN looks down at her lap.) And then they both laughed. (SUSAN turns to look at JULIE, mouth open in indignation. That does it.)(Cut to:EXT. WISTERIA LANE --- DAY SUSAN, holding a pot-plant, hurries along the road and walks up the steps to MIKE's house to ring his doorbell. We hear the dog bark as MIKE opens the door.)MIKE: Hey, Susan.SUSAN: Hi Mike. (smiles) I brought you a little housewarming gift. I probably should've brought something by earlier, but...MIKE: Actually, you're the first in the neighbourhood to stop by.SUSAN: Really? (She laughs)NARRATOR: Susan knew she was lucky. An eligible bachelor had moved onto Wisteria Lane, and she was the first to find out. But she also knew that good news travels quickly.EDIE: (waving as she walks, holding a dish) Hello there!NARRATOR: (slow motion shot of Edie jogging towards MIKE and SUSAN) Edie Britt was the most predatory divorcee in a 5 block radius. Her conquests were numerous.(Flashback to: EDIE and a workman in her living room. She grabs him, as his toolbox drops on the ground with a crash.)NARRATOR: Varied?(Cut to:a tennis coach standing behind EDIE in her living room, helping her swing a tennis racquet with her right hand. She turns and kisses him, pushing him onto her couch.)NARRATOR: And legendary.(Cut to:EDIE, sitting on her couch. She looks up at a priest, and pulls him down on top of her. He yells, his Bible dropping onto the ground.)(End of flashback. Resume to present.)(EDIE walks up to the porch, pushing her sunglasses onto her head.)EDIE: Hi Susan, I hope I'm not interrupting. You must be Mike Delfino. Hi, I'm Edie. Britt. I live over there (points). Welcome to Wisteria Lane. (SUSAN shifts uncomfortably.)NARRATOR: Susan had met the enemy, and she was a slut.MIKE: Thank you, what's this?EDIE: Sausage Puttenesca. It's just something I threw together. (SUSAN looks at her disbelievingly.) MIKE: Thanks, Edie. (laughs) That's great. Uh, I'd invite you both in, but I was sorta in the middle of something.SUSAN: (overlapping EDIE) Oh, I'm late for an appointment anyway.EDIE: (overlapping SUSAN) Oh, no problem, I just wanted to say hi.MIKE: Well, thanks.(SUSAN and EDIE walk down the steps of the porch, and down the walkway.)NARRATOR: And just like that, the race for Mike Delfino had begun. For a moment, Susan wondered if her rivalry with Edie would remain friendly.EDIE: (turns suddenly) Oh, Mike. I heard you're a plumber?MIKE: Yeah.EDIE: Do you think you could stop by later tonight and take a look at my pipes?NARRATOR: But she was reminded that when it came to men? Women don't fight fair.MIKE: Sure.EDIE: Thanks. (EDIE smiles, following SUSAN down the path.) Bye Susan. (SUSAN waves halfheartedly as she walks in the opposite direction towards her home.)CUT TO: [INT. SOLIS HOUSE -- DINING ROOM --- DAY]GABRIELLE: [OS] You can't order me around like I'm a child!(GABRIELLE paces the floor, hands on her waist as CARLOS packs his suitcase for work)CARLOS: Gabrielle...GABRIELLE: No. No, no, no, I'm not going.CARLOS: It's business, Tanaka expects everyone to bring their wives.GABRIELLE: Every time I'm around that man, he tries to grab my ass.CARLOS: (puts his hand on GABRIELLE's shoulder) I made over $200,000 doing business with him last year. If he wants to grab your ass, you let him.(CARLOS walks out of the front door and down the porch steps. He stops at the bottom of the steps, and looks sideways to where JOHN is cutting a bush with a pair of gardening shears.)CARLOS: John!JOHN: (pricks his finger on a rose thorn) Ow. (turns around to look at CARLOS) Mr. Solis. You scared me. CARLOS: Why is that bush still there? I told you to dig it up last week.JOHN: I didn't have time last week.CARLOS: I don't wanna hear your excuses, just take care of it.。

1X05 - COME IN STRANGEROriginal Airdate (ABC): 31-OCT-2004[INT -School-Day](Lynette and the boys' teacher are talking after they've painted a girl blue)Teacher: The boys are in my class because I'm the only teacher that can handle them.(shots of Lynette dragging one of the twins who is holding on to a table for dear life)Teacher: We may no longer be able to accommodate them.[INT-Young House-Living Room-Night](Zach is sat on the floor of the living room and he's spinning the barrel of a gun round. His dad watches him)Zach: Mom used this to kill herself. Why would you keep it?[EXT -Young House -Night](Zach answers the door. He's got the gun behind his back.)Bree: Are you okay?[INT-Scavo House-Kitchen -Day](The girls are sitting around drinking coffee.)Gabrielle: I think he's hiding something.[INT-Delfino House -Night](Shots of Mike on the phone and has a gun of his own)(Shots of diagrams of Wisteria Lane on Mike's wall, listing the houses, who lives where and the ages of the children.There are also photos of Gabrielle, Carlos, Julie and Susan)[INT-Solis House -Bedroom -Day](shot of Carlos discovering John's sock under the bed)[INT-Young House -Night](shot of the letter I know what you did.It makes me sick. I'm going to tell. The shot expands and we see the PI reading the note)PI: Exactly what is it you hired me to do?Paul:Someone sent that note to my wife and I need to know who.[INT -Supermarket -Day](Susan is at the checkout when Mike talks to her.)Mike: You like Alfred Hitchcock?(Susan looks up at Mike.)[INT -Mayer House -Kitchen-Night](Mrs Huber has dropped by to give Susan a pie and blackmail her. She takes out of her bag the charred measuring cup)Mrs Huber: I found it in the ruins of Edie's home.(Susan doesn't know what to say)[INT-Solis House-Stairs - Day](Carlos confronts Gabrielle with the discovered sock)Carlos: I found it under our bed. It's not mine.(Gabrielle shows Carlos the cleaning cupboard with the socks)[EXT -Wisteria Lane-Day](Shots of Julie riding her bike past an old woman)Mary Alice Voiceover: Every neighbourhood has a woman like Alberta Fome.(Mrs Fome goes out to collect her mail.)Mary Alice Voiceover: And every woman like Mrs Fome has a cat.(we see the cat through the window)[INT-Mrs Fome's House -Bedroom -Day](Shots of the cat walking over an open suitcase. It's packed with clothes.)Mary Alice Voiceover: When she travelled, Mrs Fome would arrange for friends to look after her beloved pet.(shots of Mrs Fome stoking the cat at the table. She is on the phone trying to arrange for a friend to look after the cat.)Mrs Fome: (on the phone) Thanks anyway.(She hangs up the phone and crosses another name off her list of people to ask. The last name on the list is Susan Mayer)Mary Alice Voiceover: This time, she was forced to ask her neighbour Susan Mayer.[EXT -Mayer House -Day](The doorbell rings and Susan answers it to Mrs Fome)Mary Alice Voiceover: Mrs Fome liked Susan. But it was common knowledge on Wisteria Lane that wherever Susan Mayer went, bad luck was sure to follow.(Underneath this Mrs Fome is asking Susanto look after her cat. She's nervous asking at first. And when Susan agrees she looks positively worried for her cat's well being)[EXT-Wisteria Lane-Outside Mayer House-Day](Shot of Susan backing the car out of the driveway. She hits her dustbin)Mary Alice Voiceover: Her misfortunes ranged from the common place-(Susan looks out of the window at the bin on its side)[EXT-Wedding Reception-Day]Mary Alice Voiceover: -To the unusual-(Susan is dressed in a gorgeous pink dress, she's flirting with a guy in a tux and goes to lean against a table. As she does, the table upends and she ends up on the floor with the contents of the table (including the wedding cake) all over her.)[EXT-Mayer House -Garden - Day]Mary Alice Voiceover: -To the truly bizarre.(Susan is on a stool filling her bird feeder. A bird flutters around her head and she waves her arms to shoo it away.It doesn't go and she ends up jumping off the stool trying to get away from the bird that is attacking her.)[EXT :Wisteria Lane -Outside Mrs Fome's House-Day](Mrs Fome is in a taxi, about to drive away, she seems nervous. She's looking back at Susan, who is holding her cat,waving its paw as its owner drives away)Mary Alice Voiceover: As she waved goodbye, she worried that Susan's streak of bad luck would continue. For that matter, so did her cat.(Susan walks away with the cat, and the scene changes to a shot of Mrs Fome's house in the dark.) [INT-Mrs Fome's House -Night](Susan and Julie enter Mrs Fome's house to feed the cat)Susan:(calls for the cat) Mr Whiskars.Julie: Here kitty.Susan:Dinner time. Here kitty, kitty, kitty!(Susan and Julie stop looking for the cat, when they enter the kitchen and see a lot of the drawers are open)Susan: Cats can open drawers, can they?Julie: Are you sure you didn't leave them open this morning?Susan: Noway.Julie: Wow.Do you think somebody broke in?(Susan's about to answer, when they see a large screwdriver on the kitchen table. Susan look worried) Susan: MR WHISKERS(Susan and Julie both start frantically calling for the cat and search through different rooms to find him) (The shot focuses on a door to a cupboard. We see the door open and we pan down to see the shoes of an intruder.The male intruder creeps to the door, and we see the cat follow and sneak out,with the intruder closing the door behind him)Mary Alice Voiceover: Though she didn't know it at the time Susan's luck-(we see the intruder open the door again,and put the cat back inside the house)Mary Alice Voiceover: had finally started to change.OPENING CREDITS[EXT -Wisteria Lane -Night](Shots of people all streaming towards the Scavo house)Mary Alice Voiceover: News that an intruder had breached the security of Wisteria Lane spread like wildfire.[INT-Scavo House ?Kitchen-Night](Shots of people milling around, helping themselves to coffee and cakes)Mary Alice Voiceover: At a neighbourhood watch meeting the next night, residents voiced their concerns over the increasing dangers their community faced.(we watch Mike make himself coffee, and then go to find a seat with all the others)(shot of an old woman talking to the gathered crowd)Mary Alice Voiceover: Mrs Eida Greenberg announced that someone was looking through her bathroom window whenever she took a shower.(shot of a geeky looking man talking to the gathered crowd)Mary Alice Voiceover: Bob Fisk warned those present that an unnamed government agency was listening in to their phone conversations.(shot of a large, motherly looking woman talking to the gathered crowd)Mary Alice Voiceover: Helen veil spoke of a ruthless local teenage gang that had egged her mini van. (the shot pans down to see a teenage boys quashed in between his parents on a sofa. He squirms, afraid of being caught out about the egging.)(Shot of a policeman giving a presentation to the assembled people, who are all watching attentively.) Policeman: There are three things that contribute to... (we can't hear what he says during the VO) Mary Alice Voiceover: The evening concluded with Officer Thompson offering safety tips and a plan of action.Policeman:So you can sign up for a situation you have control over.(He hands a clipboard to Lynette.) 签名同意参加Policeman:You can sign up for either daily or nightly patrols. I know that might seem a bit like overkill, but I assure you. 巡逻(Susan watches Lynette hand out the clipboard. She looks over her shoulder and smiles and waves at Mike. His halfhearted response makes her turn back, disappointed.)Policeman:That regular surveillance will deter even the most determined criminal. So are there any other questions? Alright then, let's be careful out there.(everyone claps.)(Susan gets up and talks to the policeman.)Susan: Actually I do have a question. Do you have a second?Policeman:Sure, how can I help?Susan: Well,I'm the one who discovered the break in and I think I found some evidence. Policeman:Evidence?(Susan pulls a screwdriver in a large clear plastic bag out of her purse and hands it to the policeman.) Susan: I think this is a screwdrivert left behind by the burglar. And I didn't touch it.Policeman: Why didn't you give this to the investigating officers?Susan: I tried! But they sort of laughed at me, because apparently nothing was taken from Mrs Fome's house.Policeman:Well, I apologise for that. It was totally unprofessional.Susan: Thank you! So do you think it should be dusted for prints?Policeman:Yes. And I'll make sure it gets done.(we see Mike watching the two of them.He doesn't look amused.)Susan:Great.(the cop smiles at Susan. Susan gives him a little smile, then leaves.)Susan: Bye.[INT-Scavo House -Living Room -Night](It's later on and the meeting is over.Bree is helping to pack up the folding chairs, Susan is collecting the paper cups. The others are helping to clear up, whilst the twins are jumping on the sofa, having a pillow fight.)Lynette:Boys! Stop it! Go to bed.(the boys don't stop.)Preston: But we're not tired.Lynette: Well,at least go upstairs..(She realises what she's holding, and holds out the half full bag of crisps to the boys. The boys see what she's holding and stop.)Preston: Gimme! Gimme!(Both boys reach for the crisps and Lynette backs away from them, towards the stairs. She throws the bag upstairs and the boys chase after them.)Lynette: GO!GO, GO!Preston: C' on.Porter: I'm right behind you.(Bree looks on disapprovingly at what she's just witnessed. When Lynette turns around and catches her look, she puts her hands up as if she's not going to say anything. Lynette looks pretty happy with the way she handled her kids though!!)[INT -Scavo House - Kitchen -Night](Gabrielle and Susan are continuing to clean.)Gabrielle:So why weren't you sitting with Mike tonight? I thought you two were becoming an item. 这里是解释一对的意思，GABY是问SUSAN为什么不和MIKE坐在一起，她以为他们早成一对了呢。